When I'm bored, I happen to stumble across a metroidvania game starring a bunny girl with an absurd premise called
Bunny Must Die: Chelsea and the 7 Devils. Rabi-Ribi is a wonderful game, so I'm thinking I could give it a shot. Bad idea. I haven't found myself raging at a game ever since the awful GoS.
The story is... Uh.... There's a feline world war, and there's a cat-powered thermomewclear plant. Then 3 days later, the power plant exploded, causing Bunny who just happen to be near it to grow a cat ear (on top of having bunny ear). Then, there a messenger who escorted her to the labyrinth in order to free her from the curse. Suddenly a wild rhino appears and stabs the messenger 24 times. Yeeeah... Whatever.
The game play is your standard Metroidvania. You run, you jump, you shoot stuff. You explore a huge open area with multiple paths. You can gain powerup and upgrade to increase your stats and allow you to traverse further. The main gimmick of Bunny is time power. She can time stop, outright resetting if she dies, reverse time, slow down time, and stuff like that. This requires time crystal which you get from killing enemies and destroys Castlevania-esque lamps. Bunny has 5 weapons which she can get from the lamps. Slyph Shooter, her basic weapon deals low damage, but extremely effective when used with spin attack (rapidly fire weapon in 360 degrees) and time stop. Faust Samurai, sword with great damage, low range, effective with spin attack. Black Wing, boomerang with average damage, medium range, and pierces through wall. Spike Hammer, huge hammer that FUBAR enemies, but very slow firing rate and can?t be spin attack. Last is Roppongi Missile, homing missile with very low damage and very extremely unreliable. You can only equip one weapon at a time however. You can stomp on enemies and bullet and laser if you so desired, this is required for puzzles. You can also parry attack by moving just before the attack connect like you?re some Street Fighter 3 bloke. But well, I prefer to jump my way out of trouble.
Now, let?s talk why hate this game, the controls. Simply put, it?s garbage. It?s kinda lagging and doesn?t feel right to me. Jump physiics are garbage as well. There?s 3 types of jump: standing jump, spin jump, and dash jump. Stand jump has great vertical reach but low horizantal range. Spin jump has average horizontal and vertical reach, allows spin attack, but doesn?t allow stomping enemies (A fact that gets me in trouble many times). While dash jump... You get the idea. Each types of jump is triggered depending if you?re moving or not when jumping. I don?t know about this at first and thought I was stuck until I learn about stand jumping. It?s awkward to use and may costs you a life in platforming section. Wall jumping is also finicky. You wall jump when you press jump when facing wall. I?m more like mashing the jump button when facing the wall and hope for the best. Sometimes, when I wall jump, I suddenly dash for no reason, causing me to plummet down and start from the beginning. All in all, it feels I?m less controlling Bunny and more like I?m dragging her sorry ass. I guess the controls can be mastered? But I don?t have time for it.
When attacking, you superglue yourself in the floor. It takes a while to attack, and it takes a while to resume moving (I think there?s half a second delay). Time stopping ability is kinda useless later on. Stronger enemy and bosses are obviously immune to it. They can still shoot your ass while time stopped while you are physically incapable of harming enemis when in time stop. DIO can punch a hole through a man?s chest when time stopped. Bunny can?t slice things in half when time stopped. Riiiiiiight... When fighting enemies and bosses, I just superglue myself to the floor, tanks hit and hope for the best, Also, the game keeps track of your total time (saving also add a minute to your time, although it?s more like 100 seconds though), number of tries, and deaths count. You will die a lot. Mostly due to combination of bad control and occasional crap moment.
Okay okay, enough about talking negatives, now let?s talk about the positives: The story is... out there. The boss designs are kinda unique sometimes. There?s a giant photo realistic cat, there?s a Dracula wannabe who can kill you instantly by flashing (I call BULLSHIT!!!) , the music are pretty decent as befitting of Japanese game (Especially in the Metroid-esque final area.
The final boss, Chelsea is an annoying bastard with 7 phases. Some forms are kinda okay? I guess? But 3 of them just make me wanna rage! Undine Stream is a huge and very fast water beam. It bypass your invincibility. Fail to dodge it and you?ll get stunlocked by it and it can deplete 75% of your health. The only way to escape it is to parry continuously. But well... I can?t parry well. 5th form (I forgot it's name, reduces the arena to a very tiny series of platform. It?s the only boss which requires doing other things besides shooting them to damage them. Her last form is especially nightmare. Vermilion Lord weaponized lag. If she uses it, you get stopped for a while and suddenly she surrounds you with bullet in 180 degrees (I can only fire at 90 degrees when on the ground or just suddenly whip out Undine Stream. Fortunately, you can restart to whichever form you lose at.
Yeeeah... I ain't going anywhere unless I can parry it. Get enough time powerup and you can play as Chelsea. Chelsea can?t parry, slower than Bunny, and she only has 1 main weapon. But her main weapon is an upgradeable machinegun. She can also jump really high and glide, bypassing some annoying platforming section. While she can only use 1 item at a time (unlike Bunny who permanently use hers at all time), almost all her item are fun to use, especiall the ladder. Wanna reach higher place? Place a ladder. Enemies are above you? Bash them with ladder! Bosses use bullet hell? Place ladder and camp there (Her fire rate increase dramatically when crouched or on ladder). Ladder kicks a lot of ass. Her other item is just fun to use as well. There?s a locked door which requires puzzle or a key? Blow them with bombs! A spike which deals tremendous amount of damage? Break them which your shoes! Wanna find secret passage? Reveal them with Eye of Truth. Places too high to reach with your ladder? Space Jump! The only one that is useless is Vermilion Stop, her version of time power. Guess what she can?t do when she use it?
Keep holding the shoot button and you win. Except the boss rams me out of my ladder and camp there until I died. Freaking Bastard! Her final boss is against 3 bosses all at once which has 5, 3, and 3 forms respectively. I like her first final boss, Septentrion Pleilades, it transform into 4 japanese mythical beasts (Suzaku, Genbu, Byakko, Seiryuu) and what the hell is a Kirin? It?s really cool fighting a transforming boss. Except I hate its Byakko form! It moves waaay too erratically, and it?s too big and too fast to be dodged reliably. So I just damage rush it. And Seiryuu I guess it?s kinda bad as well. It?s crapshoot whether it decided to moves inside you or not. After the fun Septentrion fight, she fights Bunny. She fights mostly just as you would fight as her (Hey! I can?t spin attack with Spike Hammer!). And then she cheats. Her final form is just full of bullshit. She bounces all over the arena, stop time constantly, fire in 360 degress. The thing is:
If she touches you once or damages you, it will be followed up with Heartbeat Queen which will instantly kill you. Because that?s what you needed after 7 phases of boss fight, right?
RIGHT?!!! Back to Septentrion again I guess. Fortunately, you only have to take only 1 phase of the final final boss. The 2nd phase is unwinnable while the last phase is kickass time.
I'm glad the game understand fairness as well as GoShit did. So that was Bunny Must Die and Chelsea and the 7 Devils. It?s a unique metroidvania that is held down by it?s horrid controls and occasional bull. Well, if you want to play as a bunny in a metroidvania environment, play Rabi-Ribi instead.