What If... (Ver 2.0 + MORE EXPLOSIONS)

[game2011]

Marisa asks for "precious things" to be donated, while Reimu "borrows" money for a lifetime.

What if Orange became annoying?

[Kaze_Senshi]

Marisa asks for "precious things" to be donated, while Reimu "borrows" money for a lifetime.

What if Orange became annoying?

If Orange became annoying, certainly someone will be killed by a KNIFE, considering that this is a touhou forum, Orange is a kind of annoying Sakuya from Youtube
So if Orange became annoying, Meiling will be stabbed by a Knife as always.



What if Yoshika had the ability to drink anything instead of eat anything?

[game2011]

She comes with the ability to change anything into liquid by biting them as well.

What if Hina rolls instead of spin?

[Hawkpath1337]

She comes with the ability to change anything into liquid by biting them as well.

What if Hina rolls instead of spins?

She would be Peppy.

What if Tewi did a barrel roll?

[Rei Scarlette]

She would be Peppy.

What if Tewi did a barrel roll?

Then it would either come with zero or two barrel rolling waves of danmaku, depending on the direction she rolls. because press z or r twice

What if Sakuya used spoons in her danmaku instead of knives?

[Error]

Spoonmaku.
Guaranteed 9999 damage per hit.

What if the book that Alice always carries around with her turned out to be an ordinary bible?

[Cybeast710]

Then, in that case, one of two things is true.
1. Holy artifacts do nothing to demons/spirits of chaos
2. Bibles aren't holy at all, they're just as sacred as a history textbook.

If 1: That's going to bite someone in the butt later.

If 2: People have even less reason to care about religion than they already do, and Byakuren, Suwako, and Kanako all take severe faith hits.

EDIT: Almost forgot the what if.

What if Touhou + Minecraft?  <---- This one I've GOTTA hear...

Before you answer, let me get this off my chest. I DON'T LIKE MINECRAFT. There. I feel a lot better now.

[game2011]

Creepers now look like human girls, 'nuff said.

What if Pixar made a Touhou movie (obviously 3D)?

[Vael]

What if Touhou + Minecraft?  <---- This one I've GOTTA hear...

One more answer

Creepers now look like human girls, 'nuff said.

What if Pixar made a Touhou movie (obviously 3D)?

ZUN's wrath shall reach the heavens and Pixar shall know the meaning of the word fear.

What if Marisa was a guy da-ze?

[Hawkpath1337]

Then her da-ze wouldn't be out of place, ze.
What if EVERYONE IN GENSOKYO said ze at the end of their sentences?

[game2011]

Touhou: Highly Responsive to Prayers-ze
Touhou: Embodiment of Scarlet Devil-ze
Touhou: Scarlet Weather Rhapsody-ze
Touhou: Forbidden Scrollery-ze
You get the idea...

What if everyone in Gensokyo, including those at SDM, forgets about Flandre's existence completely?

[Vael]

Gensokyo? Meet apocalypse.

What if Sanae found a drill-like necklace and a huge face near the shrine one day?

[Cybeast710]

She'd probably try and figure out which of her two patron goddesses would like them better.

What if Flandre lost her ability to crush Eyes?
But also gained the ability to rescale anything to whatever size she wanted? Including herself? (Arguably worse, because at least the Eye thing could kill one quickly. But this ability would quickly turn one from playmate to play toy!)

For anyone confused, it would be like the Setscale command shared by most Elder Scrolls games, meaning that the target is scaled proportionally. Basically, what I'm saying is that a target would still have the same ratio of measurements. Or in layman's terms, Reimu is still Reimu shaped, Flandre CAN'T turn her into Paper Reimu, and tables are still table shaped, meaning she can't make a really tall table out of a normal sized one.

[Hawkpath1337]

Then she would be getting in fights with Suika a lot.

What if Yukari lost to Cirno?

[Cybeast710]

She would get Cirno back later by throwing her between Mokou and Kaguya while they were dueling.
That or Utsuho's reactor.
What if Sakuya lost her power over time, but gained the same resizing powers as in the above question? For anyone who is unclear, it's not just resizing oneself. It's ANYTHING. Doesn't even need to be seen, they just need to know what and where, for an object, or WHO, in the case of a person.

Edit: I hate your answer to the Flandre one. I really do. Sakuya wouldn't do the same thing as Flandre, either. But again, this isn't meant to be serious... so I'll just let my anger bubble away and focus on making my OWN answer.
See it here...

[Hawkpath1337]

Previous answer repeat.
What if Shikieiki lost against Cir-ohwaitshedid.

[Delfigamer]

Makai would be divided by zero.

What if Alice used voodoo dolls?

[Error]

Then she would nail them to trees.
...wait, doesn't she already do that?

What if the outside world suddenly disappeared?

[Hawkpath1337]

Then Renko and Maribel would be gapped into Gensokyo.

Makai would be divided by zero.

DID YOU NOT SEE THE OHWAITSHEDID!?
*ahem* What if Yukari talked in third-person all the time?

[Gensokyo Dreadnought]

It would sound rather cute and child-like. It would also indicate Yukari had a plateau in her education somewhere along those 1200++ years of living.

What if Okuu actually can control multiple stars at once and she realized this when she was in a hot bath?

[Cybeast710]

Then wherever she is starts to resemble planet Zebes after the events of Super Metroid.

I've given up on the size question... So I'll just write my own damn answer! Because it's good fanfic material!
Insane Goddess of the Mansion

What if everyone in Gensokyo woke up and found that their powers had been randomly swapped around? And the culprits were a coalition of all the forgotten PC-98 characters?

Man, i come up with good ideas for fanfics. Pity I just don't generally have the drive or motivation to write them.

[fondue]

Reimu would've judged Mima in PoFV, and in EoSD, Yuki would be the final boss.

What if all the MiB movies were Touhou? Who would the characters be?

[Hawkpath1337]

I wouldn't watch them. MiB is too scary...

What if Yamame played Baldur's Gate?

[fondue]

I wouldn't watch them. MiB is too scary...

wat :I
Someone re-answer my question then please.

[Cybeast710]

Ran and Chen would probably be the two main characters.
(See Touhou Pocket Wars EVO + ;they don't need the light to wipe memories, and the player character almost gets mind wiped by them, but fights them off with familiars. [although the "this person saw us, we need to mind wipe them" thing loses credibility when you consider the fact that there is Touhou merchandise being sold BLOODY EVERYWHERE in that world, and therefore the odds that anyone would believe the player character are about 0]This was right before Ran, Chen. AND the player get sucked through a gap into Gensokyo. Which he/she can go back and forth between all he/she pleases somehow even though no one there can even put their hand through a gap [apart from Yukari] )

Wow, that got off topic.
The head of their agency would be Yukari, and the villain could be pretty much any of the PC-98's who've been forgotten. Maybe with Flandre being their right hand.

I wouldn't watch them. MiB is too scary...

What if Yamame played Baldur's Gate?

Dude. I'm not even going to answer your question. Don't throw down a non-answer, then ask. That is just rude. At the very least, give an answer that qualifies REMOTELY as an answer.

What if the Touhous were boss characters in Megaman Battle Network? What attacks would they have?
Two things you gotta remember about Battle Network. Battle takes place on a 6 by 6 grid.
Chip/Attack names have no more than EIGHT characters.

I have an example of Mokou here to give you an idea...

[Maribel Hearn]

The danmaku would be very tricky to dodge for Megaman: no visible hitbox... no effective vertical movement... should be clear why.

What if Touhou character x (choose yourself) existed in real life? Pick an interesting one and not a too obvious one, e.g. Utsuho destroying everything.

[Gensokyo Dreadnought]

Nitori and I would be dominating the world with human+kappa technology. We would be crowned as 'The Forefathers of New Technology".

Also, world peace would be ensued as the combined technologies would possibly cause the creation of a nuclear deterrent (something like Dr.Manhattan).

If that doesn't happen, then she'll just be the little lovely waifu who I chained down at the basement.  :V

What if Hideo Kojima decided to make the next Touhou game along with ZUN?

[game2011]

Yukari and Hakurei Miko (fanmade Touhou character) started an organization that was supposed to bring peace to Gensokyo, but the former led the organization down the road of corruption, so the latter became disgusted and threatened to leave if things do not become better.  Yukari, however, sees Hakurei Miko as a role model for the organization, so while the latter was in a coma due to an accident, she took her DNA to create two clones to replace her if she really leaves.  The two clones are Reimu and Sanae.  When Hakurei Miko woke up and learned about this, this was the last straw for her, so she left the organization.  Because of this, Yukari lost faith in everyone else and would not let any living being succeed her in ruling the organization, so using the combination of magic and technology, she created an A.I. more advanced than any known A.I. in the world in the form of a dragon to help rule over things.  However, the dragon led the organization down a path that she would never have imagined; he wanted to control the whole of Gensokyo and everything that is happening to it, including the daily lives of the inhabitants.  Hakurei Miko swears that she will put an end to this organization, even if it means getting killed by the hands of her "daughter", Reimu.

What if being pet on the head is the biggest weakness of everyone in the series?  Doing this drains them of their powers for quite some time.  This includes male characters as well.

[Hawkpath1337]

Then Yukari would be doing it non-stop.

At the very least, give an answer that qualifies REMOTELY as an answer.

But I did...

[Cybeast710]

But I did...

"I've never watched them." hardly counts as an answer. At the VERY least, you put that down, but you don't get to ask a question.