~Hakurei Shrine~ > Kosuzu's Grand Bookstore
Rising Star (Complete At Last)
FinnKaenbyou:
This fic serves 2 purposes:
- Experimenting with a first-person POV
- Why the hell do we still have so little UFO backstory fiction?
More has been written, but for now I'll test the water.
---
A lot of humans assume by default that youkai are extremely intelligent. That they have the brain to go along with their brawn, and that they're capable of useful, witty conversation.
More often than not, they're wrong. While there are occasional youkai who are particularly knowledgable, in general they're about as smart as your average wild animal. As such, you end up getting your typical packs joining together for the sake of group interest, the only conversation usually being an unpleasant grunt if the guy across from you is cutting into your share of the meat. It's a happy enough existence, if a brutal one.
But group interest or not, every pack has a leader. Without someone in power to look up to the system would collapse entirely. It doesn't matter if it's because they're stronger or smarter - there has to be an alpha male in every pack.
That, in short, was my role. As the eldest and most trusted of my people, I was wordlessly dubbed the leader of my own little tribe of youkai. I was the highest of the band of tigers.
A shining star amongst my people, so to speak. Not that a mere beast was anywhere near smart enough to appreciate that sort of imagery...
---
"Gao~!"
I let out a triumphant roar as I led the tribe onward. It was business as usual for us, moving on victorious after feasting on a passing pack of deer. The ground shook slightly as nearly twenty tigers moved together, steps in perfect unison and their stomachs much fuller than an hour ago. It was a sight to frighten away even the bravest of men.
"Rawrr!"
An angered cry from one of my followers. I tilted my head slightly, seeing one of the young cubs breaking towards the pack in my direction. His green eyes had a flame of rage encased behind them.
I growled lightly to show I was listening.
"Grr....grarrl!"
He started biting furiously at some sort of invisible snack, before turning his head to a smug-looking cub hanging at the back of the group. There was a tell-tale strand of meat hanging in his teeth, and his walk had a notable pride.
It would take a human a whole sentence to pass on this message - 'That guy over there stole my meat!'. To us, all that was necessary was a growl and a glare. Ugly, but efficient. I nodded, allowing it to slip back into his place before I acted.
I stopped. Immediately everyone behind me froze in their tracks, sitting upright. They knew I would not stop them if there was not a transgression to point out. Turning, I could see dozens of eyes looking towards me with respect. Looking back, I think my heart must have risen a little - it shouldn't have, not with the mind of an animal, but it did anyway.
Maybe that was the first sign, but I didn't notice it then.
A slow, deliberate walk into the midst of the waiting tigers. They shifted to the side without being ordered to - my intent was obvious from my body language alone. I could see the thief's eyes widen, and he paused slightly before moving out of my way.
That was enough to confirm what I'd been told. The innocent have no reason to worry.
I stopped and stared him down with my own golden eyes. He shuddered visibly, almost stepping back out of fear. Every member of the pack was watching us, either in anticipation or out of a hope that the tense atmosphere would come to a stop.
I raised a paw, and in a single clean swipe slashed marks into the thief's face.
He roared in pain, slipping backwards wincing as blood started to spill down his cheek. But he had no intention of fighting back. The point had been made, and the whole pack were witnesses to it.
I nodded to the criminal. He shook a little, but eventually returned a nod in response. As intent as I was to punish transgressions, I was not willing to reduce my numbers based on a mere tablescrap. The injury was all I was going to enforce upon him. It would be enough to convince him to keep to his own share of the food.
I turned again, to the tribe who had watched my judgement. I raised my head, giving off another mighty roar to show that all was well.
"Gaooo~!"
"""Gaooooo~!"""
The pack roared with me. We were siblings, blood ties or no. Each of us would give our life for the sake of the pack.
Which I would end up doing far sooner than I had intended.
FinnKaenbyou:
Okay screw it, I'm putting up the second part anyway. >_>
-----
As tiger youkai, each of us would normally have been strong enough to take on any hunter that would dare to oppose us. So logically there wasn't even any need for us to stay together - we could easily have stayed alive on our own.
But each and all of us had an enemy in common. One we feared, one none of us could hope to take on single-handed. One who took up residence far too close to our territory for us to be comfortable.
Our enemy was a god.
We had no name for Him, but He was known among humans as Vaisravana. A god of fortune, but at the same time a warrior willing to punish any who acted against His will. Our resting place had an old, worn-down statue of Him, gripping tightly at His spear and taunting us with the pagoda in His hand.
We liked to take turns urinating on the statue. It was about all we could do in terms of acting against Him - He was a god, after all, and none of us had powers that could match the divine.
When our prowling path passed the temple built in His honour, we all became tense on instinct alone. There was fear, panic that one day He'd come down on us and strike us all down with that foreboding spear of His. Some of the younger tigers stopped in their tracks, almost wanting to turn tail and run.
I held back the urge, staring up the staircase leading to the temple with anger in my eyes. If a god were to have a fight with us, I would fight against Him with every ounce of energy I had, and then some. As long as it gave my brothers a chance to run.
I blinked, my eyes misting up slightly. For a moment it seemed almost as if someone standing at the top of the staircase. From this distance, though, it was only a pale grey dot, so I couldn't be certain.
I moved onward, not wanting to hang around here for any longer than I had to. I was unable to make out the figure at the temple, let alone the pale red eyes she was observing me with.
"...Interesting. There's potential there..."
---
Dusk quickly fell, and the pack retreated to its usual hiding place. We rested at a small cave roughly ten minutes walk from the temple, ensuring that even a god could not take us by surprise.
Already we were tired from our prowling, and most of us were happy to rest. A rota of night-watch was quickly determined, and as the first and youngest of our cubs stood guard what remained of us helped ourselves to a well-deserved slumber.
Most of us, at least. I tried to, that was for certain, but it was this night in particular that something rather unusual came to me.
A thought.
--I'm tired.
I jolted awake, convinced for a moment there was a hunter in the cave.
It was an experience that I was unable to describe in any way - not through a growl, nor through a cold glare. Not even with a turn of my head or stamp of my paw. It was very much unlike anything I had ever done before.
There was a voice. In my head.
What's going on...?
There it was again. My eyes scanned the cave, looking for any source of sound. All that surrounded me were the sleeping bodies of my fellow tigers. Nothing that could produce a voice like this.
Maybe there's a bird on my he-
"Gao!?"
A few of those lying nearby shook a little in their sleep, nearly awoken by my outcry.
I-It's me! I'm the voice in my head!
Humans take the concept of free thought for granted. Up until now, my way of life had simply been 'eat, sleep, repeat' - I'd never thought about it or considered it. And now, suddenly, I'd almost evolved to a point that none of my fellow brethren would be able to recognise.
Most would have considered this a magnificent transformation. Me?
I-I'm nuts! I'm going nuts!
Not so much.
I'm going crazy...talking to myself like this. I should be sleeping for the hunt tomorrow...
I started walking in circles, staying quiet to keep the pack asleep. My mind was racing - for the first time ever, no less.
There was one other disadvantage to being able to think freely - your mind naturally jumps to things you don't want to think about.
Ah...what if someone tries to wake me up in the morning?! If they get too close, they might...they might find out that-
But my internal monologue was interrupted by a yelp of fear.
"Rawr!!"
Whatever was happening to me, my primal instincts weren't dulled in the slightest. That sort of cry from the guard could mean only one thing.
Danger!
Thaws:
Really interesting point of view!
I never really thought what would it be like to suddenly to able to think...
Look forward to seeing what happens next.
FinnKaenbyou:
One person interested is officially enough. Plus, well, I like this idea and wanna keep going with it. :3
---
I was lucky in that I was already awake, and I dashed over to the mouth of the cave. The cub who'd been watching had charged ahead, ready to take out the threat himself. I had confidence in him - he was one of us, so nothing besides Vaisravana himself should have been able to stop him.
"Alright, big kitty. Stay down or something."
A voice came from the distance - the sound of our target. It was a girl, apparently not a very happy one either. For a moment I wondered if our overambitious cub had just decided to take a midnight snack as I heard him pounce.
Then he flew past the mouth of the cave as an impact sounded, and I decided I was thoroughly mistaken.
By now the rest of the pack had awakened, still woozy but generally aware. They'd realised they were a member short, and turned to me for answers. I was too busy poking my head out of the cave to answer, observing the monster that had sent one of our warriors flying for a good twenty feet.
The grey dot from earlier...!?
Her outfit certainly matched it - a dull one-piece dress with pink sleeves, and in each hand an overgrown rod with letters hanging at the ends. A pair of large mouse ears poked out the back of her head, and one of her clenched fists was held in front of her - presumably how she'd created such an impact.
Instinct would otherwise have left me drooling over the thought of such an overgrown meal, but I knew full well that right now I was the prey. For the first time I could remember, I was petrified with fear.
The hunter placed her hand back at her side, sighing.
"...Geez. I just wanna talk, that's all."
...?
I tilted my head a little. Apparently whatever deity there was up there had decided that all good surprises come in twos, and that thinking for myself wasn't all I'd learn to do tonight.
She...wants to talk?
The day before, I had viewed the sounds of other youkai as indecipherable - a language I couldn't speak or understand. Now, though, it seemed almost as if this new voice in my head was translating for me, and suddenly I could understand this girl's words clear as day.
I'm dreaming, obviously. Right? ...Right?
The mouse took steps towards me, scratching behind one of her ears. I could make out a strange blue pendant hanging around her neck, which seemed to almost be glowing as she approached. I looked back, seeing 38 frightened eyes looking at me.
My head said that if we had no chance of winning we may as well try anyway and go down fighting. More than likely this girl was a servant of Vaisravana, and that meant she was dead meat to us.
But once again, the new voice in my head spoke up, offering me a point of view which I'd never stopped to consider before.
...Why do I hate Vaisravana again?
I'd taken it for granted before. Simply assumed He was trying to get in on my territory. Had I ever stopped to consider that maybe He wasn't out to get me after all? That maybe He was a decent enough God, at least good enough to leave me al-
"You with the dumb face. Who's in charge here?"
The voice was directed to me. I resented the 'dumb face' comment, but it was enough to bring me back to my senses.
...We should at least try to talk. We don't really have any other choice...
I looked back, giving my fellow tigers a slight nod. It was the symbol to assemble, and although they seemed uncomfortable with it they trusted me enough to comply. As always, I stood slightly in front of the group to show my dominance. The mouse bit her lip.
"...Huh. Wouldn't have guessed otherwise."
I didn't understand what exactly she meant by that. Maybe she had a voice in her head too. Behind me, I could hear my pack growling, ready to pounce at any moment. Our target didn't seem threatened, only annoyed.
"Look. I'll make this simple. I'm with Vaisravana."
It was a good thing no-one else had a clue what she was saying, because otherwise twenty tigers would have been laying into her right now. It was best not to let them know - pointless bloodshed wasn't the answer here.
"And, well, we kinda screwed up with you guys. You're scared, and that's bad for all of us. So I'm here to offer a deal."
I heard some of my fellows behind me lowering, growling unpleasantly. The girl's uninterested expression did little to earn their trust. They would not attack her, though - not without my command, and as yet it remained ungiven.
Assuming that the offer was reasonable, it would stay as such.
"We want the best outta you youkai to join us. Pledge loyalty Vaisravana. You get to work alongside a god, and we get faith from the rest of the pack."
"Gh-"
I cut my cry short, struggling not to show my shock to my fellow tigers.
Recruitment?!
"You're probably too out of it to know, but Vaisravana's pretty fond of tigers. You're getting a great offer here."
I pondered what sort of use a god could have for a mere tiger youkai. Pet? Mascot? Bodyguard? Considering He already had subordinates like this mouse, the last option seemed unlikely. And what sort of god was Vaisravana anyway? He had simply been an enemy to us before, we'd never taken the time to determine why.
The mouse used her rods as a balance, planting them on the ground in front of her and leaning on them. She yawned. Apparently she'd been intending to get some sleep around now as well.
"You guys have a right to refuse, sure. But then we're just stuck in the same position with you scared shitless of us and us not getting worship from you. It's win-win, really."
She tapped a finger on the rod incessantly, bored out of her skull. She had no guarantee any of us could even understand her, so it was reasonable. In fact, if she'd come to us with this offer yesterday we'd have probably had nothing to do with it.
It was an incredible, miraculous coincidence.
Maybe even...divine.
I weighed the options in my head - pretty difficult for a first-timer. Without a doubt I'd have to go - for all I know I'd advanced like this because I was meant to go. The pack would lose its leader, yes, but they'd likely react as if I'd died in battle - everyone simply moved up a rank. There were others who could take my place.
And if I refused? Then nothing. The same old day, same old hunt, same old trudge back to the cave to rest before repeating the same over and over again. It was my life. It was all I knew.
And suddenly, I didn't want it anymore.
A new wave of perspective came over me - the thought of living the same day over and over was sickening. So boring, so pointless - was that any sort of life at all?
There was no choice whatsoever. As I was now, I'd go mad trying to go back to how I was before. This wasn't just the right choice for the pack - it was the right choice for me, as well.
"Anything going on behind those shiny eyes of yours, or can I just go home now?"
A hint of irritation slipped into the mouse's voice. I'd taken longer to think the situation over than I'd planned. Startled, I nodded.
"Good to hear. Then you'd better tell your friends that you're leaving."
The tigers behind me may have not understood the conversation between us, but they were able to see that my shoulders had slumped slightly. Even if it was the right thing to do, saying goodbye to the family I'd known my whole life was still painful.
It dawned on me that I had no way to tell them I was going to work for Vaisravana. The concept of leaving your pack for the sake of a god was one I couldn't put in terms they could comprehend.
So I passed on the closest thing I could. It was a technical truth at best, but it was all that would work. I made complicated movements and gestures, realising at last that body language had its own limits.
In the end, I told them that I was offering myself as a sacrifice to appease Vaisravana, and as a result He would smile down on us from now on. Initially there were responses of shock, and one of the cubs nearly attacked mouse-girl in retaliation, but slowly the realisation dawned on them that this was clearly in the tribe's best interest. One life in order to earn the favour of a god? Those were fantastic odds.
As each of them came to terms with the plan, they hung their heads as they faced me. This was a ritual we performed for our fallen - what is known in human terms as a 'funeral'. Perhaps they simply saw it fitting to do it now, since I would never return to the pack again.
I saw one cub still uncertain. The scars from this morning's incident still hung on his cheek. I had dug in deeper than intended - that sort of wound could possibly remain for months, maybe years. Perhaps it was respect that left him so unwilling to accept my passing - or perhaps it was fear of whoever would take my place. Regardless, he slowly bowed his head along with the rest.
Then, in sync, the rest of the pack let off a quiet moan.
"Gaoooo~...."
It was a final farewell to me. A farewell to their fallen leader, never to return. I could feel my eyes watering as pride and sorrow began to well up in me at once. It was a new feeling, a bittersweet happiness that no experience afterward would be able to match.
Everyone...goodbye...
And with that, our ties were broken. I turned to the mouse girl (now nearly on the verge of sleeping where she stood) and gave one last nod. I noticed the pendant getting brighter still as I approached.
I'm ready.
She mumbled something beneath her breath, shaking herself awake. Looking down on me she seemed as bored as ever.
"So it was you. Who'd have thought?"
If this was surprise on her part, she didn't seem very emotional about it. Lifting her rods from the ground, she started on the path back to the old temple. I followed briskly, occasionally looking back at the ever-shrinking sight of my former pack.
Memories ran through my head, memories of the years we had spent together. My life from child to leader of the pack, a long line of hunts and fights. I was slightly offput when I finally noticed how similar many of them were, but regardless they were still valuable to me.
In a way, it was better that I left like this. They were in the dark about what had happened to me - how this night had changed me.
And...better yet, they don't know about that either.
I couldn't see them anymore, not even as dots on the horizon. Looking forward again, I saw the stairs leading up to the rickety temple which was supposedly to be my new home. They'd never seemed so welcoming before.
That night signified my death, the night the eldest and most trusted member of the tiger youkai passed on.
But beyond that, it was a rebirth. The beginning of a new life.
Of my newfound alliegance to Vaisravana.
Dorian White:
Really interesting perspective.
But one thing makes me wonder how fits a abstract concept like a god in such a simple mind?