~Hakurei Shrine~ > Patchouli's Scarlet Library
Recalled Lunar Romance
Slowpoke:
Hypothesize isn't a noun.
Ok, just finished. Amazing story. You have a rare talent for making me enjoy reading literature, no matter how long.
Herasy:
A nice little prologue although I felt it was a little...overdone, the romance was nice and all but it felt just a little off (I'm pretty poor when it comes to being a critic). Maybe I'm just a little uninterested when it comes to love stories.
As for typos I only spotted one
"The best of alchemists, perhaps a few of my teachers, would recognize the purpose it all."
That should be "at all" right?
Once again, great story. Look forward to the next one as usual!
Tarquinius:
--- Quote from: Herasy on November 08, 2009, 11:11:54 AM ---"The best of alchemists, perhaps a few of my teachers, would recognize the purpose it all."
That should be "at all" right?
--- End quote ---
I think 'of it all' or 'Only the best...at all' would work better. Other than that, I don't really have much to say - I don't get very involved in romance stories, although it was well done.
Dizzy H. "Muffin" Muffin:
Yeah ... no Watatsukis, then?
I mean, okay, there's still that part of me that goes, "So what's the point of making it fanfiction instead of an original work if you're just going to put the characters in the exact opposite situation and social standing from canon?" (i.e. Eirin helped found the lunar capital, so she's probably higher in social status than Kaguya; Lunarians are immortal to begin with, it's just that the Hourai Elixir makes it so they won't die if they're killed, etc) but I can't fault UD's skill for what he's done.
Usually Dead:
--- Quote from: KimikoMuffin on November 08, 2009, 05:38:41 PM ---Canon canon canon canon canon
--- End quote ---
I know, dude, I know. I'm actually really glad you mention it though! This harkens back to an issue that I struggled with when the ideas for RoSD were first gestating in my mind 3 years ago.
The universe of Touhou is so fertile, so ripe for interpretation and storytelling, that my talespinner's mind was working up its ideas not long after I started playing the Touhou games proper. I seriously did not want to write fanfiction because of all the negative stigma that goes along with it. I tried modifying the story in trivial ways that would keep it from being "touhou-related" but still allow an outlet for my ideas.
It wasn't long before I realized that, even if i change trivial things, it would still be Touhou fanfiction. I tried making a story about a priestess and a female magician who go on an adventure to stop some evil loli mage who was trying to poison the air.... and yeah it was going to be an EoSD rewrite no matter if I changed the names of things.
I realize I bastardize the canon. If ZUN got a translation of Ibunshu and read it... he'd probably laugh. And then hunt me down and beat me with the beer bottle he most recently emptied. I can only ask that people take the stories that Touhou inspires me to write unto themselves, and enjoy them for what they are.