~Hakurei Shrine~ > Alice's Art Atelier
FLANDRE
Chirumiru-chan:
This is one of my first "good" create.swf videos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9l5yR81P1o Jumpscare warning at the end.
Boomer:
Did you voice act it?
HalfGrand:
I strongly believe in giving people constructive criticism when I believe it is warranted so please do not take what I am about to say as a personal attack against you because it is anything but that. I would like to see you improve and your artistic style flourish instead of stagnate.
Your youtube video made me cringe... throughout the entire duration. Again, don't take it personally.
The speech bubbles where too big for the text dialogue and should have been made to fit instead of being 1 default size.
Both Koakuma and Patchy sounded exactly the same. Couldn't you have gotten a friend to do the other character?
If you want to keep voice acting with your own voice in future videos then I recommend you invest in better audio recording technology and that you project your voice better so that the listener can hear you clearer. Try working on your voice acting a little more before you make another one. There are plenty of videos and tutorials online that can help you with that.
Story wise... it took until after ISC for Koa and Patchy to know not to go in the basement and get torn to shreds by Flandere? Huh... why wouldn't they have known that sooner? I expected a joke or something and instead got no pay off at the end. There are so many things you could have done with Flandere besides making her a generic jump-scare. I feel like a good opportunity has been wasted here for what could have been a better video.
Still, keep it up, take my suggestions on board and in no time at all you should be making gold content instead of amateur rank content. Any good artist strives to always improve themselves!
That is all.
jester147:
Hello there. I'm Jester, fellow Walfaser. I have many to say for your video.
First off, the bubbles. You can adjust the size and text placement by pressing the M key and click the bubble. T is for text placement, white S for bubble size, red S for bubble and text size, R for rotate, and P for bubble position. Experiment with it, you'll get the hang of it.
Next, the scene transitions. The scenes moving erratically is a bit annoying. You could improve it by using a screen capture software. Or if you can't do it, try using photoshop and experiment with layers and opacity, such as the previous scene and the next scene will be in the exact same position.
By the way, you could press the spacebar to enter theatre mode, which removes all the interface and you can use left and right keys to navigate between scenes. You can leave theatre mode by pressing the spacebar again.
I don't have anything to say much about the voice acting other than it's way too low.
Hope these things will help you improve. Happy Walfasing.
Chirumiru-chan:
Thank you guys for suggestions, and yes Boomer, I did do all the voices. The only good-sounding one is Flandre herself. I'm gonna improve, and in the process of making a Tenshi video.