>Be Iku.
Patience.
> Patchouli: Carefully consider jellybean optimization.Unfortunately, you have no way of telling what the SECONDARY EFFECTS of each flavor of jellybean is. You do not have your EXHAUSTIVE PLAYER'S GUIDE on hand at the moment, and you cannot simply taste test them to determine their effects. You do not gain any benefit from simply eating candy; to gain the associated boosts, you must consume it from a BACKUP CANDY SLOT, which can only be used at a CRITICAL MOMENT, much like a LAST WORD.
You elect to simply figure out what flavor each color is, and pick your favorites.
Some time later, you settle on RED CINNAMON, FRENCH VANILLA, and BLACK LICORICE flavor jellybeans, and swap them with the randomly selected previous jellybeans.
With this careful deliberation resolved, you start eating the jellybeans by the fistful, because seriously eating these things one at a time is not satisfying at all.
> Patchouli: Read the book again.Now, where were you? You open up the book once more to try to make some sense of that arcane gobbledegook.
Okay, that was bizarre.
You know what? You eat jellybeans instead. You just sit there and eat those jellybeans.
However, you eventually reach a point where the jellybeans at the bottom of the bowl are stale. Presumably, somebody ate about half the bowl, refilled it, and continued this process until a sedimentary layer of the chewy confections formed at the bottom. You put the bowl back and leave it be, so that the cycle may begin anew.
Just as you are about to muster enough boredom to get out of your chair and go do something else, Remilia returns. Remilia explains that her plan is to STEAL THE SHOW by going out and making her DIVA DEBUT! All she needs you to do is figure out how to work the stage controls.
You tell her that this is a terrible idea, and that even if she sings well the crowd won't be okay with her trying to upstage the star of the show. Remilia retorts that the peasants have SHORT ATTENTION SPANS and will eat up anything you put in front of them. You don't necessarily disagree with this CYNICAL ASSESSMENT, so you let the point go.
You ask her what she's going to do about Kurodani, who is set to perform soon. She tells you that she has already sent Sakuya to TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS.
[
BGM ]
> Patchouli: Examine stage controls.Soon, you find yourself standing in front of the controls for the stage lighting and such, while Remilia prepares for her performance.
This control panel is much larger than it needs to be, with bright colors and large print labels. It was clearly designed in such a way that even a very drunk oni could operate it.
Once all the rappers have cleared out, you decide to turn some of the lights on to indicate the show will be starting soon. That should round up a crowd.
Unfortunately, you find that another side effect of these buttons being designed for a very drunk oni is that they are much too hard to press with your feeble strength!
However, you quickly devise an ELEGANT SOLUTION. As expected, all manner of party guests start to gather.
> Patchouli: Start the show.
Once a sizable crowd of spectators has been rounded up, you dim the lights and give Remi the signal that you're about to start.
> Ichirin: GET HYPE.
The lights are dimming! The show's about to start!!
[
BGM ]
> Patchouli: 2x Facepalm Combo.
You knew something like this would happen, but still.
> Patchouli: Assist Remilia.The crowd is none too pleased that Remi has attempted to upstage their beloved Yamame. Looks like you?ll need to save Remi?s bacon.
Your throwing arm is MORE THAN A LITTLE RUSTY. So much for PLAN A.
> SET SPELL CARD!!
Seems like you'll get to pick a fight with an oni today after all!
> _
