1. Do you enjoy or dislike yaoi? How strongly do you feel about that?
Yaoi's something that I've found myself gravitating towards in recent years; before then I was mostly indifferent aside from the influence of my fujoshi friends back in Hong Kong (who would literally recite Sukisyo's Chinese name as a battle mantra). Unfortunately, most typical yaoi media seem to have this thing where the focus is on the eye candy rather than any sort of actual emotional intimacy between two characters. If I want to get my jollies off of a guy boinking another guy, I will gladly go find some trap doujins and satisfy myself that way. I won't even get into yaoi fanworks, barring the doujins (where some of them actually AREN'T half bad), but the Western fanworks such as fanfiction are mostly kind of that thing which tends to turn off a lot of people, at least if they didn't ignore the content in the first place. But I digress. Yaoi isn't something I feel particularly strongly towards, but then again it's the sort of thing I only read if I'm bored or feel like seeing some traps in action. Overall, I can say I do enjoy yaoi to some extent but not enough for anyone to call me a total fujoshi (I will admit I will go bonkers over yaoi pairings if I feel they're fitting or just plain realistic and genuinely workable).
2. Do you enjoy or dislike yuri? How strongly do you feel about that?
Hooo boy. Here's the precursor to the meat of the post, arguably. I am through and through a yuri fanatic. You will be hard pressed to find a piece of yuri material I have not already devoured with my mind and my eyes. Yuri is one of the things I enjoy watching the most, many yuri shows which are objectively bad by written AND occasionally visual standards I will place over those that are actually good simply because they're yuri (Strawberry Panic! is probably one of my favourite anime in the entire world, and we all know how bad that is). I feel so strongly about yuri to the point that watching certain anime or OVAs will drive me so full of emotions that I'll literally break into tears out of sheer positive emotion, and when I watch anime with heavy yuri sub-text but without any proper resolution or it was just a tease, I will become very angry about it (I won't slam the anime but yeah). Yuri art, yuri manga, yuri stories - everything, they are all things I enjoy perusing to varying degrees. Of further note is that I do not get sexually aroused whenever I watch or see yuri. In fact, I feel heavily emotional when perusing such materials. I have also played yuri VNs, so yeah they won't ever escape my grasp. In fact, yuri is not something I watch for excitement. It is something I watch if I want to feel fuzzy and warm and tingly. As a very affectionate person, I derive more personal pleasure from seeing such affection in yuri rather than the sexual intercourse often depicted in yaoi.
3. If you enjoy or dislike both, does one bring out a stronger reaction than another?
As I mentioned earlier, yuri definitely brings out a stronger reaction in me than yaoi. Yaoi is something I read to humor myself or maybe if I'm bored and bothered simultaneously I'll help myself to some trap doujins. But with yuri, it's something that I really do literally watch deeply as if it were some sort of masterpiece, and by the end of it I'm probably shivering from a sheer overload of emotion, or I'm crying. Sometimes both, but yuri definitely brings out the worst best stronger reaction in me.
4. Assuming the pairing you've witnessed is well-written/well-drawn, what is it about yaoi and/or yuri that makes you enjoy it or dislike it?
Since I feel ambivalently positive towards yaoi, I'll talk about yuri, which is what I feel far more passionate about. Okay, first thing's first. A lot of what I find enjoyable in yuri lies in the small interactions between the two characters outside of the scissoring. Even something as simple as the initial conversation between two characters before they get down and tango in bed can have me in an absolute frenzy, or even something as simple as a passionate makeout that again leads into the inevitable bedroom scene. The major flaw with citing an example like Himeko and Chikane in Kannazuki no Miko (No offense taken, AF) is that the relationship there was bordering unrequited - in the manga version, Chikane pretty much raped Himeko with a flute
, and it seemed to be solely there for the purpose of... Well, rustling people's jimmies (given that it was Kaishaku who did the art there, and his art is pretty much known for that). A well-written yuri story has something that's remotely realistic considering the nature of yuri. It's something where both characters have a give-and-take relationship going and their sexual intimacy is consummated properly.
It's not just the sexual interactions between the two characters. It's everything that ISN'T the sex that makes it more powerful of a relationship to me. The Sono Hanabira ni Kuchiduke wo OVA (2010) featuring Sawaguchi Mai and Kawamura Reo is the most recent example of a yuri anime that drove me to tears more than once upon several replays of this. During the 20-ish minute OVA, there were approximately 2 or 3 small sex scenes in them. However, in between, there were many moments of the two sharing tender moments with each other, and they even had an absolutely adorable quarrel (though in context it probably shouldn't be seen as such...) and you know what? It's not just the sex that makes me feel so warm. It's, as I said, the circumstances surrounding the sex that enhances the experience so much for me. It would be very accurate to say that I love it when yuri in question follows the shenanigans of two girls who love each other. To deviate a little bit from the definition, the true yuri experience for me cannot be achieved without the soft-core form - the shoujo-ai. A lot of the yuri that people find "dry" is most likely attributed to the lack of balance within depicting such relationships - there's usually either too much hot sex and not enough shoujo-ai fluff, or there's too much shoujo-ai fluff and not enough hot sex to properly consummate the passionate emotion that's derived from the fluff.
And for me, well, if the yuri is just the "dry" stuff anyone says, that certainly doesn't stop me from enjoying it for what it is. The romance between two girls in this manner is just something I find incredibly enamoring, incredibly romantic, incredibly sensational to experience, even as a spectator. I don't really particularly care if people call it shallow or "vanilla." To me, it's still an experience that makes me feel warm and nice inside, because of all the affection evident in it. Of course, there are exceptions to this, such as the aforementioned Himeko/Chikane dynamic (which was mostly Chikane pining for someone who just didn't fucking get it, and that's a fault of the anime because the manga has it pretty much differently, where Chikane is actually just a bitch). Even so, this just makes me think more about the whole relationship dynamic even more, and it makes me appreciate yuri very, VERY much.
5. How do you feel about actual, flesh-and-blood same sex pairings?
They are awesome and I am in full support of them, as long as these relationships are actually healthy and are not abusive in one way or another. I believe that relationships do not have limitations - sure, they can be painful, and are a very big investment, but if people put the time to reinforce them, then relationships can be wonderful things, and these wonderful things can be experienced between a male and a male, or a female and a female as well, instead of just the heterosexual couples we see all the time. I know several same-sex couples who are having a wonderful time in life right now and I am incredibly happy for them. I'm also bisexual, so I could just be a little bit biased here.
6. Are there any other caveats you'd like to add?
Yuri is not something I find sexually arousing, it is something I find incredibly mentally stimulating. It makes me happy, and that is ultimately what matters to me. Yaoi is usually what I go to if I want to think about something on the carnal side of things.