Maybe. Because I don't trust myself with a character's personality enough to write fanfiction (then again, that's never stopped anyone before... And isn't /always/ awful... And ZUN does leave a lot of holes for us to fill in~)
You're new to PSL, aren't you? :3
Well, if you do go through with it, I look forward to reading it! :3
>>;
It may be that I'm listening to inspiring as crap music, but I like how all of you think.I'm the unofficial god-father of PSL, and one of the official cheerleaders. It's what I do.
Except Definitely Satori, to hell with that guy!ಠ_ಠ SCUSE ME SIR WTF ARE YOU DOIN
ಠ_ಠ SCUSE ME SIR WTF ARE YOU DOIN
There will be NO self-deprecation in this Library. Not on my watch.
(within reason)Get out. >:< There will be no such thing as "reason" in PSL as long as I've got anything to say about it.
Get out. >:<
Physically lift the boat and smack me, or drive (sail?) it into me?
EDIT:
I'm about halfway done with the first 'chapter,' sadly a headache has put me at a standstill when it comes to thinking about anything more than just breathing (see my post in the rage thread), so I'll probably be able to get something up either late tonight or sometime t'morrow.
Apologies for the delay, etc etc.
pssst I'm still getting gibberish machine code from the emails, if you want me to look it over, send it via PM
No worries. Focus on feeling better! o/'
the second.
followed immediately by the first.
Hell, if I keep up this chain of proofreading, I may just end up wanting to start writing again, myself.
I greatly enjoy this.
Delicious Murasa origin is delicious.
Okay, I spend my hours reading fics/books in english, and I'll tell you: You are really good at writting.
The way you described her life was reaaaally nicely-done. I could picture the way Murasa lived, and that was because of your good writting. Artists transmit feelings, and lemme tell you something, I could totally feel Murasa ( if you miraculously can understand me).
Also, I could see that in some little parts of the stories (the ones that really don't change anything, but make the story more complete) you could write the things in a way that you...ummm...how to say this? Make them believable, but in some sort of weird way. Like, you gave life to the story by just adding those things.
And well, the story...I think it is really intersting, and that it has lots of potential. It is already good, you started with a good idea, and it seems like you really thought about it ( don't you deny it~) Besides, you payed attention to the details of the story, you gave it a background, you didn't just got into the action, which is - at least to me - a good thing.
For example, maybe the beginning could have started with Murasa in a soup kitchen, thinking about how tired she is of having to live like a poor person, and then maybe someone goes up to talk to her, at which point we find out that she came to the port city to try and get into business there.I actually REALLY like that idea and will probably rewrite that first bit because it does flow better. And I am all about flow~
Also, I would suggest that you use exclamation points sparingly. With the number that you have right now, they gradually lose their impact. In fact, you might as well only use them for important portions of dialogue and leave them out of the non-dialogue segments altogether. Semicolons, for a different reason, should be rare. Use periods for the most part.
Obviously, you've gotten a good enough reaction from everyone else that this is pretty minor. Keep up the good work.Any criticism is welcome because it helps improve this for both myself and for you all!
(Also, good idea on editing the thread title with the date of the last posted chapter. I should do that for my story...)Yeah... I figured a handful of people would notice it without that~
I actually REALLY like that idea and will probably rewrite that first bit because it does flow better. And I am all about flow~
Oh god...I just love Murasa more and more~~ (8)
I've already told you I LOVE her personality~~
The old man was really well portrayed, though we probably won't see him in a long time, that's one of the little things to appreciate
So you better write fast, or I'll kill you :) (you already know that I can "kyuu" you ?? xD)
Delicious. Do continue.
RIP Murasa : (
Not quite. She only thinks she died and went to heaven, simply because everything was so amazing. If incredibly loud.
Speaking as a fat guy who loves delicious things, I like to say I captured that emotion fairly well. :V (Made m'self hungry writin' the damn thing, too...)
Or were you joking and now I look silly? :ohdear: