-
Well, hopefully it's okay if I take this thread back now~ NO!.. Eh.. I guess I'll allow it. >_>; Thanks to Nobu for looking after it while I was gone.
CURRENT LIST OF WRITINGS:
The Power Of Faith (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg62411#msg62411)
Anything But That (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg63466#msg63466)
The Legacy Of Utsuho Yatagarasu Reiuji III (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg64032#msg64032)
Kawashiro Tech Support (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg66147#msg66147)
Third Eye In Pure Waters:
Part 1 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg67323#msg67323)
Part 2 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg70245#msg70245)
The (very long) continuation (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1882.msg71755#msg71755)
A Business Proposition (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg71206#msg71206)
Faith/Stay Night (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg73387#msg73387)
The Immortal Game (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg132629#msg132629)
Renko, Gunslinger Extraordinaire (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg144871#msg144871)
Satori's Last Stand (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg147466#msg147466)
(WARNING: These fics were produced during a bit of a rough time. Expect much tear-jerking.)
Daily Rounds (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg158868#msg158868)
Regret (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg163613#msg163613)
Moving On:
Part 1 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg170734#msg170734)
Part 2 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg174361#msg174361)
Part 3 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg182045#msg182045)
(Okay, the emo is over. You can look now.)
Obligatory New Year's Saccharine Sweet Fic (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg211163#msg211163)
Judge Eiki (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg212854#msg212854)
Highway Robbery (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg218011#msg218011)
Wait For It... (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg218753#msg218753)
VIDEO BONUS: Perfect Cherry Blossom in 60 Seconds (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9B3O9YyTPI0)
Surprise Attack 101 (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg224605#msg224605)
Tea at Twilight (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg230348#msg230348)
Just Clearing The Throat, Seriously (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg236319#msg236319)
For The Record (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg248585#msg248585)
The Yama's Special Day (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg255277#msg255277)
The Only Possible Explanation (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg271043#msg271043)
Doubly Spoilt (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg292837#msg292837)
The Forgotten (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg305636#msg305636)
The Full Rainbow (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg307646#msg307646)
Ending The Great Resurrection (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg312607#msg312607)
Six Out Of Seven (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg338797#msg338797)
Two Tigers (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg341017#msg341017)
(durr 2 month hiatus i have no idea what happened here)
Don't Forget The ATTITUDE, Part I (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg391241#msg391241)
(Part 2 will be written whenever I can come up with decent ideas for it. >_>)
Forsaken (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg433330.html#msg433330)
Freedom Fighter Koishi (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg458730.html#msg458730)
Deluxe Christmas Edition (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg500071.html#msg500071)
(THREE MONTHS
THREE MONTHS)
Wai Wai, Momi-Chan! (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg589221.html#msg589221)
Echoes of the Fallen Monk (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg605112.html#msg605112)
A Polite Request To The Human Village Of Gensokyo (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg678033.html#msg678033)
The Trump Card (10D Spoilers!) (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg699809.html#msg699809)
An Unwanted Gift (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg739653.html#msg739653)
Swaps of a Certain Kind (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg748295.html#msg748295)
Hold Harmony Sacred (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg759220.html#msg759220)
Divine Day Off (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg762135.html#msg762135)
The Diver Fairies (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg787207.html#msg787207)
A Breath of Fresh Air (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg798931.html#msg798931)
The Dolphin and the Dragon (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg802183.html#msg802183)
A Little Weight Problem (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg814620.html#msg814620)
Guest Story: A Day in the Sun (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg825900.html#msg825900)
Marin Gong, PhD (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg839167.html#msg839167)
The Secretest of Shows (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg850580.html#msg850580)
Divine Guidance (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg852324.html#msg852324)
The Trouble With Wednesdays (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg882547.html#msg882547)
Behind Closed Doors [NSFW] (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg886775.html#msg886775)
Nazwatch (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg909514.html#msg909514)
One Night Lamprey Stand (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg952754.html#msg952754)
A Sparrow In The Sea (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1013252.html#msg1013252)
Winter Warmup (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1034160.html#msg1034160)
Rivals With Benefits (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1057876.html#msg1057876)
The Best Story Ever [Citation Needed] (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1063149.html#msg1063149)
The Nature of a Beast (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1096422.html#msg1096422)
The Seabed Ballroom Incident (https://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1149011.html#msg1149011)
The Maidens In Black (https://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1178237.html#msg1178237)
Big Trouble on the Little Princess (https://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1205769.html#msg1205769)
A Friend From Hell (https://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1206461.html#msg1206461)
The Pilfering Puppeteer (https://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg1215354.html#msg1215354)
---
Just a little place where I intend to put the little stories that come to my mind. Starting off with one that came to me while I was playing Hisoutensoku:
-----
Dammit!
Sanae leapt back as the amulets hit the ground, annihilating the mound on which she'd been standing. Reimu had her playing keepaway, and she was too experienced to give her an opening.
"What's the matter? Don't tell me the proud priestess of the Moriya Shrine is running away!"
Reimu threw a jibe at Sanae along with another wave of amulets. The green-haired miko dove behind a rock, the explosion beside her covering her robes in dust. She wasn't going to have a chance fighting like this - Reimu was just too strong.
But still...I can't afford to lose here. Kanako-sama and Suwako-chan would never let me hear the end of it...
"Come on, grow a backbone and stand up! Or if you want to give up, just say so and I'll let you go~"
Reimu spoke with complete confidence, a set of needles firmly held between her fingers, ready to pierce Sanae as soon as she stood up. She hadn't even been challenged - taking the first opening she'd seen, Reimu hadn't been so much as attacked for the remainder of the fight.
This is it...isn't it?
Mentally Sanae was losing the will to fight. All she was going to do from now on was delay the inevitable, and she wasn't going to take a beating for no reason. She was on the verge of accepting Reimu's offer when another voice jumped into her head.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! You thought you could handle something like this on your own?!"
K-Kanako-sama!?
Her deity's voice rang in her ears, filled with indignation. Behind it trailed a younger, more cheerful one, which Sanae was more than pleased to pay more attention to.
"Sanae-chan, don't forget that we can help as well. A god's a miko's best weapon, right?"
She could feel them beside her, immaterial but definitely there. Their presence alone was enough to shake the fear from Sanae's heart, the strength she needed rising up again within her.
"T-Thank you, both of you! I'll...I'll do my best!"
Reimu could only hear Sanae talking to herself, and hesitated as her opponent stood up. There was a moment of silence as Sanae walked out from behind the rock, making no effort to defend herself.
"Well, I don't hear you say you're giving up, so I guess you've just lost it. I'll make this quick."
Reimu effortlessly flung the needles at Sanae, expecting at least a quick knockout if not an actual kill. She wondered briefly why Sanae refused to move.
My gods are watching over me...they won't let me down, I know it.
A new confidence ran in Sanae, and she stared Reimu down as the needles approached. She wasn't sure what would stop them, but she knew for sure that they'd never hit their target.
She had faith.
"What the-!?"
Almost instantly a water bubble had appeared in front of Sanae, Suwako chanting an incantation from within. The needles pierced the bubble and immediately lost all momentum, sinking to the bottom uselessly. Reimu looked on with an expression mixing shock and awe, as Sanae took the opportunity to step forward.
"See, Reimu? THIS is the difference between us!"
She charged at Reimu, raising her fist to begin a strike. As she ran she became aware of another person standing beside her, and looking away for an instant she saw Kanako, as proud and ambitious as ever, copying her motions exactly. Their opponent was frozen in place - she may have been able to dodge one attack, but not two at once.
""WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, REIMU HAKUREI!?""
Sanae and Kanako screamed out in unity as both fists hit their mark. Reimu was knocked backwards into the mountain base behind her, hitting the rock with a crash which every youkai in a five-mile radius could hear. Needless to say she was out cold, and had left an impressive miko-shaped hole in the stone. Kanako murmured something to herself about suing Hakurei for damaging her mountain as Sanae fell to her knees in triumph.
"I...I did it! Kanako-sama, I did it!"
She turned around to get the approval of her second deity.
"Suwako-chan, I di-"
She quickly became aware that Suwako couldn't answer her. She was stuck in the bubble of water she'd made earlier, her cheeks bulging as she flailed around comically without moving an inch.
"S-Suwako-chan!?"
Sanae dashed up to the bubble to heave Suwako out. Kanako simply facepalmed.
"...See, it's stupid crap like this that lost her her shrine in the first place..."
-----
It sort of started with a mental image of Suwako stuck in the bubble with a >_< face, and somehow it expanded into a short with GDLK PUNCHING. Guess that's how it works sometimes. >_>
-
""WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, REIMU HAKUREI!?""
That was my favorite line.
-
Same here. XD
Generally awesome on the whole, though.
-
There wasn't a single member of the Yakumo residence that didn't dread this ritual.
Ran and Yukari always did what they could to ignore the problem for as long as possible, but the longer they left it the worse it got. After so long it simply became a matter of which of the two would snap first. Most often it was Ran, her fox-like nose unable to bear the growing stench.
"...It's simply too much to handle. We need to do something about it."
They made a deliberate effort to never discuss it in Chen's presence, simply because even suggesting the solution was enough to make every hair in her body stand on end. Their complaints were silent. Their plan of action...less so.
They would always wait until dawn to strike, when Chen was lying fast asleep in bed. Just the sight of her resting peacefully like that, purring softly as she dreamt was enough to leave Ran with second thoughts about what they were doing. She whispered a complaint to her mistress, careful not to awaken the sleeping cat.
"Yukari-sama, maybe we shouldn't go through with this. Chen's happy enough as is, we shouldn't-"
Yukari brushed her shikigami's complaints away with a brush of her hand.
"Ran, someday I swear I WILL teach you to look out for your own interests ahead of your servant's. And it's not like I enjoy this either, but it's for her own good."
"M-My apologies, Yukari-sama."
Ran bowed her head in shame. Yukari placed her hand on the fox's shoulder, silently forgiving her.
"Alright then, let's try and be quiet about this. If she wakes up now it'll be disastrous for both of us, understand?"
Ran nodded, shutting up completely. The head of the Yakumo family clicked her fingers once.
"...Boundary of Cover and Exposure."
Even saying it brought a weary tone to Yukari's voice, her guilt obvious. Chen's pyjamas undid themselves neatly, folding into a tidy-looking pile at the side of her bed.
"Alright, let's move. She'll probably wake up as soon as we move her, so be ready to hold her down until she relaxes."
Yukari strolled out, doing her best to feign that she didn't care. Ran looked back once at her shikigami, probably dreaming about catching mice or becoming the Princess of the Cats or something. It was a peaceful slumber that she didn't want to break.
But still...I have no choice. I'm sorry, Chen...
---
She was prancing around a flower field, pouncing at the endless army of butterflies that landed around her. It was a simple but incredibly entertaining dream.
"Here I come, butterfly. Let's see you get away from me~!"
She leapt into the air, aiming at a single golden butterfly landing on a daffodil. It made no attempt to escape, and she was already set to catch it.
She missed the flower, and missed the ground as well.
"Nyaa!?"
The dream came to an end quickly as she jolted awake. Falling in your sleep is a common occurance, but for most people the experience isn't literal. Looking up, she saw herself surrounded by a sea of purple, eyes looking down upon her from all sides. It wasn't a sight she didn't recognise, but straight after a dream it could only mean one thing.
"Not agaaiiiiii-"
Chen's cry was cut short as she emerged from the other side of the gap, falling from the ceiling of a room in her own house. She didn't even need to look around to know where she was.
But I don't wanna have a baaath~!
-
XD
I kind of saw the punchline coming as soon as it got to the bit about Ran's nose, but it was still good.
-
oh god why (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1699.msg64003#msg64003)
-----
"So...this is it."
Reimu felt the sweat dripping down her face, the immense heat nearly overwhelming her. This was the absolute deepest region of the city, and the source of whatever had been releasing those geysers. She could make out some sort of winged figure sitting in the distance below an awe-inspiring orb of fire.
"Well, Reimu, do what you do best. Beat that youkai up and everything should be back to normal."
Yukari took another opportunity to throw guidance at the shrinemaiden through the orbs she had brought down with her. She had half a mind to throw then into the river of magma beneath her, but they did technically make her a little stronger so she resisted the urge. Flying onto the small island of rock where her final foe sat, Reimu expected her to turn around and begin some dramatic elegant speech given the top hat and monocle she was wearing.
The raven was too distracted by her drink to even notice her.
What the hell am I dealing with this time?
She only seemed to have one good arm, the other being some sort of control rod which Reimu didn't recognise, but in that arm she was holding a teacup filled with molten lava. She sipped at it like it was water, treating it as if it were the Holy Grail itself. At her side sat a plate on which were sitting a trio of scones, all buttered perfectly and giving off a disturbing green glow.
"Ah, nothing pleases the senses more than time to yourself and a nice cup of tea. Or at least, as close as one can expect to find to tea in a hellhole such as this. I really shall have to advise Mistress Satori to invest in proper meals sometime down the line..."
She spoke to herself with a dialect that Reimu didn't recognise, still ignorant of the shrine maiden's presence. Eventually Reimu got tired of waiting to be noticed and, without a hint of guilt, walked over to her and kicked the plate of scones into the magma.
"Hi there. Sorry for interrupting your little tea party."
The raven stood up, looked awkwardly at the spot where the plate had fallen, then turned to Reimu with the most dignified expression of anger physically possible.
"You...you bloody nutcase! Can't you even knock or say hello? Or is this what all of you ruffians above ground call a greeting?"
The head of the house and the cat were nothing like this, from what Reimu could remember beyond beating the crap out of both of them. Hell, she didn't even remember Remilia being this stuck-up. She decided to make the most of the situation and carefully poke the teacup off the edge of the island for an encore, hoping to invoke a reaction.
"Maybe I'd be more civil if you weren't throwing freaking geysers around up there. It gets kind of annoying, you know."
Some sort of profanity hung in the raven's mouth for a few seconds, barely held in by her sense of civility. She started up on a calmer response, still visibly struggling to maintain her pride.
"Firstly, I prefer to be called Utsuho Yatagarasu Reiuji III, not this brutish 'you' that seems to come so naturally to you. Secondly, I am afraid that these geysers are merely a side effect of my own powers, things like this wonderful fusion reaction occuring right above me. Unless you're willing to eliminate me personally, you will simply have to-"
Utsuho's monologue was cut off as Reimu held the tip of her gohei against her throat. The shrine maiden's expression hadn't changed in the slightest.
"Now why couldn't you have just said that earlier? Youkai extermination is what I do best."
Utsuho simply looked down at the stick in Reimu's hands, unimpressed by such primitive weaponry. She honestly hadn't expected this moron to take the hint and refer to her by her name, given that she probably had as many brain cells as London had clear, sunny days. (Sometimes Utsuho wished she knew where exactly this London place was, because for some reason the name had been popping into her head ever since she'd been given the power of the Yatagarasu.)
"What, so that's it? No introductions, no battle of wits? Just a simplistic brawl until one of us is unable to stand?"
"You haven't been out much, have you?" Reimu finished, prodding the top hat off of the raven's head. There were plenty of ways to irritate the residents of Touhou, but none were more rage-inducing than depriving them of their headwear. There was a pause as Utsuho comprehended exactly what had just happened.
"...P...Piss off!"
The red eye on Utsuho's chest glowed for an instant before releasing a massive burst of flame. Reimu's reactions were barely enough to save her from being burned to a crisp, taking to the air and quickly trying to gain some distance.
"What, you're running away now? That's hardly very polite, you know!"
The rod on her right arm started to spin slightly, and from its tip a sphere started to emerge. It grew rapidly, easily larger than Reimu was tall and still expanding. Immediately the shrine maiden knew that she wasn't going to win this with firepower alone.
Crap, when was the last time I had to use my brain to beat someone down?
The sphere finally finished expanding, large enough to fit maybe four shrine maidens in. Utsuho adjusted her monocle with her free arm as she aimed at Reimu, all still while maintaining her flawless posture.
"Well, fools like you are probably at their most useful when they're reduced to carbon anyway. Farewell!"
She fired, sending the overgrown bullet towards the shrine maiden at ludicrous speed. She had no hope of dodging out of the way of it in time, and on instinct alone she grabbed at one of the floating orbs she'd been given.
"Yukari!"
The one word of warning was all her partner needed. A gap appeared in the air in front of Reimu, swallowing her up and producing her a few feet above Utsuho. The raven couldn't make out her foe's escape from behind the bullet itself, so she initially assumed that the fight was already over.
"Hah! Bloody loony thought she could take me on."
She would have just sat down and made herself another cup of lava tea had Reimu not grabbed her monocle from above her, lifting it off of her face.
"Missed me."
Utsuho's expression was one of total shock - there was no way someone like her could have been outsmarted by someone so simple, so plain, so working-class, and now here she was being humiliated on top of that?
She wouldn't accept that. She couldn't accept that.
"You little piece of...!"
Utsuho flew straight upwards, planning to pierce Reimu with her overgrown rod of an arm. If she'd had anything resembling a brain, she'd probably have just shot her. Or maybe realised that Reimu was planning to teleport away the instant Utsuho charged at her.
And on top of that, she would likely have realised that as soon as Reimu disappeared she was on an unstoppable crash course with her own violent fusion reaction.
"...Oh, bugger."
Utsuho Yatagarasu Reiuji III was never seen again, but given the explosion that tore apart the entire underground network she'd been residing in no-one was foolish enough to think she had escaped alive. Somewhere in the distance, Reimu Hakurei sipped at her tea quietly, pleased that she had resolved yet another incident.
---
"You made her British?"
Sanae asked the question again for good measure, still not believing what her god was telling her. She'd heard of Britain from her time before Gensokyo, but all that she knew of it were the parodies that people made of British people on television back home.
"Yeah, I said it was the price she'd have to pay to control nuclear fusion. It wasn't really, obviously, I just thought it'd be kinda funny."
Come to think of it, that was all that Kanako knew of the British as well.
"...You're kind of a bitch, Kanako-sama."
"You're welcome."
-
Slaves
YOU HAVE TO DRAW THIS
-
That was so epic.
I was thinking then, would she have been a chav, but this came up.
OH BUGGER>
-
/me shines the symbol of a wristchain in the sky.
British Utsuho drinking tea. Must see.
Edit: I admire your story writing Rou. I wish I mastered the dutch language at the same level as you are mastering the english language. I would be definitely a writer around now.
-
I can imagine that Utsuho has a southern england accent, but with a little bit of poshness as well. I can just imagine Utsuho sitting there with a Pipe, the newspaper, complaining about how much it rains in england. Also a bowler hat.
Nice writing there, very descriptive, you might wanna be an author someday I know I would read your books.
-
Slaves
YOU HAVE TO DRAW THIS
british Utsuho, huh?
maaaayyybeee
-
I can imagine that Utsuho has a southern england accent, but with a little bit of poshness as well. I can just imagine Utsuho sitting there with a Pipe, the newspaper, complaining about how much it rains in england. Also a bowler hat.
Nice writing there, very descriptive, you might wanna be an author someday I know I would read your books.
"Would you like some lemon in your Earl Grey, Guv?"
Oh man.
-
Rou, if you don't write Nitori doing tech support on Sanae's computer, I may have to start playing MoF until I can write it. And you don't want me writing after hours of danmaku with no breaks.
-
I can imagine that Utsuho has a southern england accent, but with a little bit of poshness as well. I can just imagine Utsuho sitting there with a Pipe, the newspaper, complaining about how much it rains in england. Also a bowler hat.
Nice writing there, very descriptive, you might wanna be an author someday I know I would read your books.
"Would you like some lemon in your Earl Grey, Guv?"
Oh man.
Cockney Utsuho is a go.
-
Rou, if you don't write Nitori doing tech support on Sanae's computer, I may have to start playing MoF until I can write it. And you don't want me writing after hours of danmaku with no breaks.
As tempted as I am to see said reaction, the idea caught my attention. Here you go~
-----
KAWASHIRO TECH SUPPORT CENTER
CALL RECORDING #592
"Good afternoon, and thank you for calling the Kawashiro Tech Support Hotline. Nitori speaking, how may I help you?"
"Um...hello? My computer is acting up and I don't know what to do about it..."
"That's what I'm here for, ma'am. Could you give me your name, please?"
"Sanae. Sanae Kotiya."
"Ah, the Moriya Shrine. Weren't you down here a few hours ago buying yourself something?"
"Well, yes, but things are getting a little...complicated."
"Alright then. First of all, can you tell me what exactly the problem is?"
"Uh...well..."
"Come on, spit it out. I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."
"S-Sorry. It's just...sort of embarrassing..."
"Don't worry, Miss Kotiya. I've been doing this job for a while now, and I'm pretty sure there's nothing you can say that'll surprise me."
"...Really?"
"Yes, really."
"Okay then. What it is is that...there's a hole in it."
"...A hole in what?"
"The computer."
"..."
"It won't turn on now...do I need to rewire it or something?"
"...Was there a...hole...in your computer when you first used it?"
"Oh, no, it was running AOK from the word go. The problem is that Kanako-sama was having an argument with Suwako-chan and, well, one thing led to another and before you know it they're throwing danmaku all across the shrine. I got away fine, but a stray bullet smashed a big gaping hole in this brand new PC. Surely you've had family issues like that?"
"...Uh...no?"
"Well, that's how it works over here. They apologised but neither of them has any idea how to fix it, so they told me to call you. ...Hey, is it a bad sign if there's smoke coming from it?"
"...Miss Kotiya, I'm relatively sure your computer is damaged beyond repair. The internal circuitry would have been torn to shreds by an impact like that."
"...Beyond repair?"
"Yes."
"And the warranty doesn't cover this?"
"I'm pretty sure we've never had a clause to cover firing a bullet through your computer. My apologies."
"I see."
"...If you want, I could give you a little discount next time you're in..."
"No thanks, I think I'll be fine. Thank you for at least trying to help."
"That's what I do. So what are you gonna do now?"
"I'm going to have a little...talk with those two. Yeah, a talk...that's what it'll be..."
"Um, are you okay over there? You sound like you're getting a little angry..."
"...I mean I might beat them up a little, but it won't be that bad...yes, beating them up a little will be fine..."
"...Miss Kotiya?"
"Thank you again. If you don't mind, I need to be somewhere else right now. ...Well if beating them up a little is okay, what's the harm with beating them up a little more?"
"...I don't pay myself enough for this."
END OF CALL
-----
Trying something out with the 'nothing but discussion' thing. I was tempted to take a leaf from UD's book and have Sanae end all of her sentences with 'in the name of Yasaka', but I decided to go with this instead.
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'in the name of Yasaka'
Okay. Now do a Sailor Sanae fic. "In the name of Yasaka, I will punish you!"
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I am amused by what I see here. And yes, in the way it intends to amuse. >>
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'in the name of Yasaka'
Okay. Now do a Sailor Sanae fic. "In the name of Yasaka, I will punish you!"
Someone write this. Seriously.
Who'd be the other Senshi, though? I can see Utsuho as Mars (that is if you don't go the route of Sailor Sol), Cirno as Mercury, and Suwako as Uranus, and in that context I can easily see Reimu as Beryl or (insert villain here), but...
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Nah, Yuugi'd be better as Uranus, Suwako would probably be Neptune I guess.
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Nah, Yuugi'd be better as Uranus, Suwako would probably be Neptune I guess.
*self-facepalm
How the heck did I forget that Neptune is the water-based one?
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*has never watched Sailor Moon except for two episodes of the English dub which he hated*
Anyway, this is half of an idea that I had earlier. I won't have the chance to finish it for a day or so, so I'll just put the first part up here. It's something a little more serious, just as a one-off.
-----
Getting out of the Palace unseen was easier than she had expected. Orin and Utsuho were sound asleep when she'd made her move, and Koishi was nowhere to be seen as usual. Besides that, more or less everyone had been more than keen to act as though she wasn't there, so she reached the surface without a hitch.
Just as well - they would be worried sick if they found out what I was doing.
The Mountain of Youkai was only a small walk away, and Satori made the trip alone. It was an unusually quiet trip, because not only was there nothing to hear there was no-one to hear. A chance to have some time to herself without other people's thoughts flooding her mind wasn't something that Satori was used to.
This must be how Koishi feels all the time.
She sighed unconsciously as her sister's name came up in her memories. Always running around and doing whatever she felt like - it was something that Satori had never felt. This little endeavor was supposed to be an attempt at emulating her sister's behaviour in an attempt to understand her a little better.
Her destination approached, a pristine lake at the foot of the mountain. She'd seen lakes underground, but none had ever had water this clean or enticing. There was probably more living in the water here than anything she had seen back home.
I have it all to myself, as well.
Satori began to undress, carefully sliding her clothing around the wires of her third eye. Beneath everything she was wearing a simple dark-blue swimsuit, the closest thing to swimwear you could hope to find underground. She sat at the lake's edge, testing the water with her feet. Cold, but bearable.
It was a thought that had sprung to her head from nowhere a short time ago - 'I wonder what swimming feels like'. She'd clung onto the idea insistently, one of her few random urges, and over the last few days she'd been making plans to sneak out for a night like this. True, she had no idea how to swim, but there were plenty of fish down here who probably knew plenty about it who she could learn from.
Orin would be having a fit right about now if she knew about this - saying that it was too dangerous or too reckless or something like that. It would have been a funny sight, almost a role reversal given their usual antics, but if she had found out there was no way she would have let Satori away with it.
"...Okay, then. Here I go."
She took a single deep breath as she pushed herself lightly into the water, making a small, quiet splash. This was Satori Komeiji's first swimming lesson, and she'd literally thrown herself in at the deep end.
-
*Humbly waiting for continuation.*
-
For ease of understanding, other people's thoughts are in inverted commas and italics.
-----
Satori instinctively closed her eyes as she hit the water, taking a few seconds to get accustomed to the new surroundings. Her third eye was unaffected, as receptive as ever and already picking up murmurs from the nearby fish.
...There're all coming towards me. Does this usually happen?
True, a land-dweller jumping into your lake would probably attract your interest if you were a fish, but every living thing in the lake seemed to be interested in her. The wave of thoughts hit Satori hard, and she had to focus to pick out anything in particular.
"Look at that eye. Did the other girl have hers open?"
Other girl? Do they mean...Koishi?
The same thoughts were coming from more or less all of them, watching her curiously as she sank deeper into the lake. Unsure if she was meant to keep up appearances, Satori waved lightly to the crowd with a small grin. The fish turned to each other, murmuring about the sight.
"What's going on over here? Lemme see!"
One voice rose from behind the crowd, louder than the ones around it. The smaller fish dispersed immediately, letting the complaining creature take a look at Satori. It wasn't a fish, it was something different whose name Satori vaguely remembered from a book she'd read somewhere.
A...dolphin?
Its back was a dark shade of grey, with a lighter patch on its belly. It hastily started circling Satori, inspecting her from all angles. She felt vaguely like a piece of art on exhibition.
"She really looks a lot like Koishi-chan...actually, didn't she say that she had a sister?"
That thought was enough to grab Satori's attention. Her guess had been right - Koishi had been here before her, which was probably why she everyone down here was so interested in her. She would have replied to confirm the dolphin's suspicions, but the lack of air in her surroundings made that a bad idea.
"Blub?"
She hadn't realised it, but she'd been under for longer than she'd thought. Her lungs were getting impatient, and she hadn't had the chance to figure out how to swim from any of the nearby fish yet. She quickly looked into the heart of one of them, but the only thing she could make out was 'swing fin left, then right, then repeat'. Legs weren't anywhere near as flexible, and despite her growing worry Satori continued to sink.
This is bad...
"Blub-blub..."
Satori held a hand over her mouth to try and stop the air from escaping. She was slowly becoming aware that this whole swimming thing was one of the worst ideas she'd had in recent times. The dolphin reacted hastily to the sight of the girl in distress.
"And Koishi-chan didn't know how to swim, either. She'll need me to help her out..."
The dolphin stopped circling Satori, swimming in front and turning its back towards her. Well aware that it was trying to help her out of the water, Satori clung onto it with both hands and focused on not letting any more air loose. Despite the extra weight the dolphin made it to the surface with ease, helping Satori back onto dry land as she caught her breath.
"...Thanks for your help. I guess that was a bad idea on my part."
"You said it. That's twice I've had to save people like that."
The same voice as before, but something about it felt wrong to Satori. It was louder, more vibrant, less like a thought and more like actual speech.
But I don't remember dolphins being able to talk...
Turning back to the lake, Satori did a double-take as she realised the dolphin that had saved her was nowhere to be seen. In its place was a girl in her early teens with long silver hair and what looked like a dark grey fin coming out from the back of her neck. Satori facepalmed.
What am I talking about? This is Gensokyo. Everything talks in Gensokyo.
-----
I've become aware that if I want to make something decent of this I'm going to have to make it much longer than I'd intended. I'm considering just putting it in its own thread next time I update it and reserving this thread for shorter (and probably lulz-ier) stories. What's the reader opinion on that?
And yes, I did finally dwell into the dreaded ranks of OCs. She still needs a name, though.
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god rou that was terrible what were you thinking i'm not your fan
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god rou that was terrible what were you thinking i'm not your fan
Ayayayayayaya, the constructive criticism is of overwhelming quality there.
Now for constructive criticism...
Is dolphin girl naked? =3 *shot* (On a serious note, is she? Given your detail of description given for the swimsuit, that would be interesting to add for consistency. Alternatively I am talking out of my ass since I see nothing majorly wrong.)
And who knows, you could have this as an ongoing series between your shorts, a thread that connects it all or something...I dunno...
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I'm visualizing her naked and it's pretty tasty.
Of course I don't know what she looks like so all the better.
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All of a sudden dolphin sex seems like a good idea.
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I was intending for her to be wearing something, but at that point Satori couldn't see it because it was under the water.
But now you guys have me tempted to make her naked. I can feel my standards slowly slipping away...-_-
-
So yes, I've decided that I'm going to move this Satori thing into its own topic next time I update it because otherwise it'd be too cluttered.
And as much as I'm going to regret asking this: Naked dolphin youkai Y/N?
In the meantime, have another idea that came to me recently.
-----
"Miss Aya, you have a visitor."
Momizi's voice crackled across the intercom, reaching Aya at her desk. She grumbled to herself, letting go of the cup of coffee she was about to start drinking.
I swear, they deliberately come just when I get time to myself.
"Bring her in."
She didn't try to hide her frustration as she replied to her receptionist. She was CEO of the largest publishing group in Gensokyo, sitting here on the top floor of a skyscraper constructed in her name, and she STILL had to bother talking with all the little people?
The double-doors at the other end of the room opened, and a kappa dressed in blue walked in. She cautiously tiptoed her way over to the desk, afraid that anything resembling sound would irritate Aya.
"U-Um, hello. I'm Nitori Kawashiro and, um..."
Aya remained silent as the kappa stuttered her introduction, tapping her pen against her desk.
"Well, I have an, um, invention that I..."
The tapping got louder and louder as Aya's patience wore thin. Nitori only seemed to be getting more nervous by the second, her stuttering getting worse and worse.
"I was w-w-wondering if maybe y-you could-"
Snap.
The pen slammed into the desk for the final time, breaking neatly in two. Nitori looked down at its remains, a single bead of sweat running down her face.
"Just tell me what the hell you want me to see."
From the tone she said it in, Aya may as well have added 'or else' at the end of that sentence. Nitori jerked back into place, quickly pulling out some sort of large metallic object from her backpack.
"W-well, this is what I call a jetpack..."
She held it behind her back, a pair of handles sticking out for her to grab. The main component of the invention seemed to be a set of rocket-like devices currently pointed towards the ceiling. Beneath her left thumb was a small red button, which she pressed with a gulp.
Immediately the pack sprang to life, propelling Nitori into the air and spitting out a fiery, deafening exhaust. Aya would have been impressed if the jetpack wasn't so good at producing waste products.
"Oh, for the love of Yasaka - WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY CARPET!?"
That thing cost more than most youkai would ever make in their lifetime, and now it was getting covered in all sorts of dust and ash. Nitori, realising the problem, panicked and cut off the supply instantly, forgetting she was five feet in the air. She landed face first with a painful-sounding smack.
"Ow...s-sorry, it's a prototype, and I haven't quite ironed out that problem yet..."
Nitori pulled herself back up in an attempt to save face, afraid that she'd just cost herself the deal. Aya held back the urge to strangle her here and now, reminding herself that there was money on the line.
"...I'll get someone in to clean it later. So, I assume you want an advertisement in the Bunbunmaru?"
It wasn't that unusual for Aya to hear about some new product and be asked to include it in her paper's latest issue. The Bunbunmaru had become the tabloid of choice for almost the entire population of Gensokyo, so being mentioned there would get you noticed for sure. Naturally, Aya charged a good deal for the privelige, but that was business.
"Actually, no...that isn't it."
Aya blinked. It was the closest she usually got to displaying shock. Nitori was back to stumbling over her words again.
"What I'm h-here for is...t-to see if you'd be w-willing to invest in it."
Total silence.
"I-I don't really have the money to produce this thing by the masses, so I was k-kinda hoping that you'd help a little for a share of the p-profits..."
Aya dug her nails into the wooden desk, making a creaking sound like she was clawing a chalkboard. She stood up, adjusting her tie and straightening up her ultra-expensive suit. She'd given up on her casual attire a long time ago - this was the sort of clothing that leaders wore.
"Let me get this straight. You want me - a tengu, a youkai who can fly whenever the hell I want - to pay money to endorse a product that lets me do something I already know how to do?"
Nitori was more than aware that she'd blown her pitch, but Aya's voice carried a frightening tone that made her worry she was in for more than a refusal. She nodded silently, too scared to speak as Aya opened one of the windows behind her.
"Let me see this jetpack of yours."
The kappa responded instantly, almost throwing off the device and placing it with the utmost care on Aya's desk. The tengu examined it from all angles, ignoring its designer entirely.
"So, am I right in thinking that you can't fly yourself unless you use this?"
Nitori didn't like where this conversation was going, but lacking the courage to lie she shook her head.
"Good."
Aya clicked her fingers, summoning an unnatural burst of wind. Nitori was swept up instantly, blown cleanly out of the window and sent plummeting for twenty stories.
I haven't had to do that for a while.
Aya took her seat at the desk again and pressed a button on the intercom.
"Momizi, prepare an alibi for me so that the other tengu don't get too interested. Don't worry about Yamaxanadu - we've made our contribution this month, so I'm sure she'll be willing to turn a blind eye to a tragic accident like this. And while you're at it, get someone to sweep this carpet."
She didn't need to explain what had happened - she was relatively sure that Momizi would have seen Nitori falling past her on the next floor down. There was a sigh from the other end of the intercom.
"...Yes, Miss Aya. For all intents and purposes you were out following those rumours about a treasure ship in the sky."
"Excellent. It's people like you that make this job bearable, Momizi."
She went back to her coffee, finally taking her much-wanted first sip. It came out almost as quickly as it had gone in.
"Ack! And get a fresh cup of coffee in here, would you? This one tastes like reheated shit."
"Yes, Miss Aya."
The intercom cut off as Momizi went away to prepare another cup. Aya swiveled her chair, looking out at Gensokyo from her own little fortress.
Well, Aya, this is it. You made it. You're number one.
But still...was it really worth it?
-
I'm gonna vote "no" on the naked-dolphin-chick just for that ending. :P
Also, what's a dolphin doing in fresh water?
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Ayayayayaya, poor Nitori, bitchy Aya. Amusing story though.
I wonder which other toes were stepped on, and consequently crushed by Aya in this continuity. =p
Also, while I am a dirty minded, perverted, horny bastard, I vote for the youkai having clothes...
And Muffin...it's Gensokyo for all we know there either a) is no salt water or, b) the lake she was in is salt water, or c) the dolphin don't care, being a youkai...who knows, she may miss the ocean after getting proverbially stranded here. But at large...it's gensokyo. Silly Muffin. :P
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Also, what's a dolphin doing in fresh water?
Proving that I know nothing about marine biology.
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Okay, what's the Watsonian (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WatsonianVersusDoylist) (warning, tvtropes, etc) answer? ;)
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Okay, what's the Watsonian (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WatsonianVersusDoylist) (warning, tvtropes, etc) answer? ;)
Given that there's no real salt water source in Gensokyo (confirmed to have no oceans) there's no other place for a dolphin youkai to wind up.
Will that do, Holmes?
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isn't it obvious?
her ability is "spiritual power over water"!
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isn't it obvious?
her ability is "spiritual power over water"!
hurrah for blatant stealing from Nitori Holy shit, does Slaves read my stuff?
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well duh
how else would i be able to draw that dolphin thing? 8)
but it's not control of water like Nitori, its SPIRITUAL!
so basically she can make water saltwater/freshwater/keep it clean etc.
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...That might actually work as a power without being blatantly Mary-Sueish. *takes notes*
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...That might actually work as a power without being blatantly Mary-Sueish. *takes notes*
Also without being f'ing useless like "manipulation of wind and leaves" or "manipulation of flavor" ... except in relatively contrived situations ... (http://dizzy.pestermom.com/?p=thcomic22)
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Also without being f'ing useless like "manipulation of wind and leaves" or "manipulation of flavor" ... except in relatively contrived situations ... (http://dizzy.pestermom.com/?p=thcomic22)
I'm ashamed you didn't link this given your love of TVTropes. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ThisLooksLikeAJobForAquaman)
Anyway, after spending far too long reading up on names and stumbling through a variety of kanji, I finally ended up producing the name Tororetsu Sango (瀞 (http://www.mahou.org/Kanji/4654/)洌 (http://www.mahou.org/Kanji/5E30/) さんご) for dolphin loli, basically looking for references to purity for most of it. If anyone reading actually has a decent enough grasp of kanji to point out a mistake here (because I sure as hell can't) feel free to point it out, otherwise I'm sticking with it.
Actually, I'll get started on the next part now that that's out of the way. :/
EDIT: Okay, it's updated and moved into its own topic. (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1882.msg71755#msg71755) I'll keep this one for shorter and sweeter ideas.
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I don't love TVTropes, it's just really convenient sometimes. ;)
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Welp, after my adventure into the Bad End Corner, I had another urge to imitate the Nasu brand of writing.
So, here's a little something that I felt had to come into existence.
-----
I run for the shrine.
"Hah, hah, hah-"
I know I'm still being followed, but I don't have the brainpower left to process fear. Every ounce of power in my body is focused on moving as fast as possible.
"Eh? Looks like she's running away."
I hear her again, taunting me. The voice of the woman who has already killed me once before rings across the mountain. She could catch me at any time, maybe even send her little mouse companion to do it for her, and still she hangs back.
...She's enjoying this.
Surely she's seeking bloodlust here. The only alternative would be that she was watching over me, but that's ridiculous. After all, she'd already made an attempt on my life. A successful one, too.
"But still...how did I...?"
I murmur to myself, trying not to waste too much breath. My memory is fuzzy...I remember that spear piercing my heart, and then someone hanging over me...a feeling of warmth, and a familiar pair of eyes...young, like Suwako-chan's-
"Aah!"
Lost in my thoughts, I trip on the stairs to the shrine. I'm bruised all over, but I'm fine as long as nothing is broken. The voice laughs at me.
"Ufufu, running to your own god now? Prayer won't save you, no matter how hard you wish for it!"
I've never climbed these stairs so quickly before. What should have taken me ten minutes has taken only two. I'm already halfway across the courtyard as finally my assailant comes into view behind me.
She's still wearing that striking dress, with the tiger pattern. The stripes continue to run through her short orange hair, but my attention is focused on her hand. That spear, still red with my own blood, is held tightly between her fingers.
The image is intense. This woman literally is a tiger.
And I...I am her prey, running desperately for my own safety.
I burst through the door, slamming it down quickly. I scan the room hastily, looking for something to block the door with.
My search is fruitless - everything in this room would be taken down by her spear in an instant.
...If that's how it is, then I'll need to make a weapon.
My gohei is still lying on the ground from my earlier training. I pick it up and hastily focus my mind on it.
"...Trace, on."
The familiar feeling of a rod being shoved down my back. Pain means nothing to me now, and it only makes me focus harder.
"Reinforcement...complete."
The circuit runs its course in double-time. The gohei may only be made of wood, but thanks to me placing some of my magical energy in it it's harder than an ordinary sword. With a weapon like this, I might stand a chance against that woman.
"Knock knock! Anybody home!?"
The door to the shrine is knocked down effortlessly. The lancer jumps in acrobatically, spear already aimed at my chest. Even with all my training, it's an attack I can barely counter-
"Gah!"
There is a painful cracking sound.
No matter how much energy I put into it, my reinforcement technique isn't perfect. There are holes in the process, and if a vulnerable spot is hit it will come apart just like a normal gohei.
I fall to the floor.
The magic has tired me as much as the running. I did what I could to get away, but I've given everything I have. The spear hangs over my throat, ready to stab me at any moment.
"Heh. Looks like the chase is over."
She grins for what I expect to be the last time. Her hands tighten around her weapon.
"So long. It's been fun, kid."
...Is this it? Is this how I'm going to die?
...It can't be here, there's so much I still have to do.
...That's why...I, Sanae Kotiya, need to live now more than ever--
Suddenly.
A bright light envelops me.
"Ah?!"
The assailant winces, blinded. My hand is...glowing. A strange red symbol is shining on my palm, something I can't recognise.
Around me, on the floor, a magic circle has constructed itself instantly. The interior of the shrine is bathed in light, leaving both of us stunned.
And when the light fades...a third girl is standing there.
...Against the moonlight.
That girl looks so severe, and yet so pure.
She wears a simple dress of green and white, but her cold blue eyes have the undeniable severity of a swordsman's. A pair of blades hang by her side, a single flower hanging off the sheath of the longer one. A black ribbon holds her short silver hair in place.
...And despite all that I've been through, I can't take my eyes off of her.
She is strict, and yet incredibly beautiful.
"Servant, Saber, has arrived as summoned."
She turns to me still sitting on the floor. Her voice is feminine, but totally humble.
"...I ask of you. Are you my Master?"
-----
I will not lie. When I saw Shou wielding a spear, one of the first things I thought was 'Okay, Gensokyo now has a canon Lancer'. Spear the Gungnir is one spellcard, it doesn't count.
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Needs more Tohno Gland.
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Needs more Tohno Gland.
How do you think she got into UFO?
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Needs more Reverse Tohno Gland.
How do you think she got into UFO?
Ok, Fix'd.
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Holy crap, this topic is ALIVE again?!
-----
"You're going to have to explain this one to me, Kaguya. I don't say this a lot anymore, but this game is new to me."
Mokou muttered an admission to Kaguya as she entered the room, seeing a table roughly six feet long planted in its centre. A pair of chairs sat at the ends, waiting for the immortals to use them, and in the middle was a mysterious metallic object Mokou didn't recognise. It was roughly large enough to fit in her hand, but didn't resemble any piece of technology she'd seen beforehand. Kaguya followed her afterwards, pushing her from behind towards the nearest chair as she walked over to the other side.
"I had to be told about it as well - it's from the outside world. Reisen apparently found it when she went shopping at Kourindou and was curious enough to bring it back here. Out there, they call it a 'revolver'."
The dull grey metal of the device almost begged for a polish. Kaguya, pulling it over, rubbed it lightly with her sleeve as she continued talking.
"People out there don't know how to use danmaku, so they come up with machinery to do it instead. It's meant to work that each of the six chambers in it contains a bullet - pull the trigger and fire."
Casually, Kaguya pointed the gun at Mokou and fired. For an instant Mokou flinched, but a loud click filled the room as the princess let out a little laugh.
"Oh, you poor thing. I haven't even loaded it yet."
She smirked, with that same degrading smirk she had always had, as she pulled out a single bullet. She jammed it into one of the revolver's chambers, spinning it wildly as she returned it to its firing state.
"So now, we know that there's one bullet in there, but we don't know which chamber."
She pointed the gun at her own head.
"So we take turns finding out. Sound fun?"
Mokou was still angry, but she couldn't help but admit that the princess had some style. She figured that if this was her new way of killing Kaguya, she may as well enjoy it as much as possible. She shrugged, grinning.
"Aw, what the hell. What's the worst that could happen?"
The pair laughed together, in a way only immortals could. Then, after a few seconds, the laughter died down into a tense, painful silence. Kaguya continued to hold the revolver against her own skull, not shaking in the slightest as her finger pushed down on the trigger.
Click.
Not so much as a sigh of relief from her as she slid the gun down the table to Mokou.
"Your turn."
Mokou took a few seconds to figure out which fingers went where as she picked the device up. She replicated Kaguya's pose as accurately as possible. The princess looked at her with a manic grin.
"Ooh, wonder if it's the chamber with the bullet in it? There's a 1 in 5 chance, that's pretty large, and then your brains are gonna be all over the wall~!"
Jeez, shut up already. You'd have thought after all these years she'd have learned to shut her damn trap.
Trying to phase her out, Mokou pulled the trigger instantly.
Click.
"Awww."
Kaguya frowned in false disappointment as the gun made its way back to her. The face made Mokou feel warm and fuzzy inside.
"Hmm, down to 1 in 4 now...hope I don't make a mess to hard for Udonge to clean up-"
Click.
"Never mind~"
The princess seemed nearly bipolar - jumping between elated and disapproving with reckless abandon. The gun was once against sitting in front of Mokou, and she paused before picking it up.
"How do you get such a kick out of this, anyway? We've been doing it for centuries now."
She pointed the gun at herself, but held herself away from pulling the trigger. She had to hear her answer first. Kaguya responded with an expression that seemed almost infantile.
"Well, why not? It means I get to spend more time with you, doesn't it?"
"Cut the crap."
Click.
Mokou didn't bother handing the gun over right away - that would cut the conversation short far too soon. She stared at Kaguya, perplexed.
"The hell is wrong with you? How am I meant to get any sorta pleasure outta this if you're enjoying it?"
Kaguya placed her elbows on the table, waving a finger at her opponent.
"Come on, don't act like my company doesn't mean anything to you, Mokou-taaaaan."
She let the last syllable fall out of her mouth as slowly as possible. Mokou grit her teeth.
"Think of it this way. Who do I know better than you? Over a millenium I've got to know every little quirk about you. Every like and dislike, every dream, every fantasy, every thought. And I'm gonna keep seeing you from now until everything here's just a pile of dust. Probably a good while after that as well."
Mokou's hand squeezed the handle of the gun, almost misfiring the fifth shot. How could she be saying this?
"What about your goddamn alchemist? Isn't she immortal too?"
"Eirin is...different. She regrets the Elixir, and since then our relationship has been strictly...business. But you," Kaguya said, pointing at Mokou manically, "you're different. You come here and put every ounce of your heart and soul into killing me. Maybe that's just the thing I need to keep things interesting over an eternity. An intensity like that. You're the same in that regard, aren't you?"
I'm...making things interesting for her? I...enjoy this?
Mokou had half a mind to ignite the table right now and throw it in her face, but some unseen emotion was holding her back. She couldn't agree with this, not in the slightest - Kaguya had shamed her, shamed her father, this couldn't be entertaining to her. It was vengeance, simply striving for revenge...wasn't it?
"Ufufufu." Kaguya chuckled. "Don't tell me you're only realising this now. That's another thing I've always loved about you, Mokou - so headstrong, but you never think anything through. It's been a millenium and you still haven't grown up."
Mokou didn't bother to slide the gun across the table anymore, flinging it straight at Kaguya's face. The princess caught it with ease, carefully placing it to her own head.
"Ooh, down to 1 in 2 now. Getting dangerous."
She was deliberately taking as long as possible, savouring Mokou's reaction. The phoenix girl was running through every emotion she could think of - anger, fear, guilt, joy, envy, love, madness, elation...
I...I have to hate her! I HAVE to!
She watched Kaguya's slender finger start to push down on the trigger. All her instincts told her to pray for the bullet to go straight through her head right now, but some other part of her was begging for mercy. This couldn't be happening, shouldn't be happening. Was she...worried about Kaguya?
"I was confused like you, once."
A single, totally calm sentence. Mokou froze in place as Kaguya took on a tone that didn't seen to fit her eternally youthful complexion.
"Of course I hated you. You tried to kill me over and over again, so of course I had to hate you. But then I realised something - what does death mean to me now, anyway? I'm immortal, so you can kill me seven times and I'll stand up eight. You're hardly taking anything from me, no matter how much you may have wished you were. And in return, I got to experience your fiery passion first-hand - your insistence to kill me, over and over again for the rest of eternity - there'll never be another person in the world as amazing as you, Mokou-tan, and I'm going to have you all to myself."
Kaguya smiled. It was one of the most genuine expressions Mokou had seen from her in centuries.
"I know this sounds like a paradox, but it's these games with you that make me feel...alive. So I don't want to lose you, Mokou. You don't want to admit it, but you feel the same about me."
The room returned to a painful silence. Mokou seemed calm on the outside, but deep down she was tearing herself apart. Kaguya couldn't be telling the truth, this was a trap, a trick...
But...it sounds so...right...
"...W-What're you doing?! Hurry up and shoot, dammit!"
Tears were running from her eyes, and she hated herself for it. She hadn't cried in a long while - not for pain, not for people, not for anything. And now Kaguya had reduced her to a gibbering wreck with such pathetic ease.
"See? I'm the most important person in your life, and you're the most important person in mine. So we should make the most of these nights, shouldn't we?"
Kaguya heard no reply from Mokou other than a few muffled sobs. She shrugged.
"Oh well. Guess it's time to bring this to an end, one way or another."
Slowly, agonisingly, Kaguya nudged the trigger.
Click.
Kaguya grinned, sliding the gun back down the table to the silent Mokou.
"Well, there's one bullet left in there. Finish the game off."
Mokou looked down at the revolver, observing it again. She could easily point it at Kaguya and fire once, put a bullet right between that smug bitch's eyes. It was cheating, true, but she didn't care about these stupid games. She wanted to kill Kaguya, and that was it.
So why hadn't she done it already? Why was she just looking at the gun?
"Awwww. Mokou-tan isn't thinking of cheating, is she?"
Kaguya was almost goading her own, asking her to fire at her. She wanted to, she HAD to want to, this was what her life was, wasn't it?
Wasn't it?
...Isn't it?
It was a long, painful minute before Mokou finally grasped the gun. Kaguya watched every tiny aspect of her motion, curious. The gun slowly rose off the table...
...until it completed its journey, the barrel lodged firmly against Mokou's head.
"...You know the one thing I hate the most about you?"
"Hm?"
Mokou's finger started to pull the trigger.
"I hate when you're right."
The room exploded in a flash of light as Mokou's head burst cleanly, leaving an ugly splatter of blood against the wall. Her body slumped onto the table, revolver still hanging in her hand. Kaguya sighed.
"...Any second now."
Almost as if on cue, Mokou's body began to move in reverse, pulling itself back into its original position. The blood on the wall flew back into place, and the scattered remnants of her head magically repaired themselves. In a matter of seconds, she had resurrected completely. But something about her was...different.
"Dammit. Never stops hurting, does it?"
Mokou didn't have the same expression of anger, of hatred, that's she'd had before. Instead there was a proud smile that showed no sign of fear, no willingness to surrender. It was like by shooting herself, Mokou had somehow been reborn. She slid the empty gun back over to Kaguya, a stray bloodstain still hanging on it.
"Get another bullet. Best two out of three."
Kaguya let out a little laugh as she caught the gun, complying with Mokou's demand. This was the side of her she loved the most - totally confident, totally proud, refusing to budge an inch.
"We're going to be doing this all night, aren't we?"
Mokou nodded.
"Yup. Just the way we like it."
Another laugh, as Kaguya spun the barrels and handed the gun over to Mokou. It was her turn to go first.
"Well, then," said Mokou, "let us make the most of our eternity together, shall we?"
-
It's rigged so that Mokou always dies
-
It's rigged so that Mokou always dies
"So, that makes it 37-nil."
"FIRST TO 38!"
-
It's rigged so that Mokou always dies
Hahahahaha
Awesome story, Rou.
-
Heh ... yeah, this seems to be one of the standard rationales for outright Mokou x Kaguya.
Reminds me of a line from Thief of Time: "It was a small, sad, and wobbly little thought, and it ran: each of them had no one else but the other. There. It was a thought that sobbed into its own handkerchief, but it was true."
-
<Kaneiki_Yasakanadu> I just googled that and...
<Kaneiki_Yasakanadu> Renko was a recognizably Western archetype (???Western??? as in non-Russian, but also ???Western??? as in cowboy hat and six-shooter: Gary Cooper in a fur hat) ...
<Kaneiki_Yasakanadu> ._.;
<Ruroumu-Konyapaku> Hahahaha.
<Sana> .....?
<Sana> Wha?
<Kerigis> Haaha
<Kaneiki_Yasakanadu> Renko in a cowboy hat holding a Six Shooter
These people are to blame for this.
-----
The tavern was rough, with violent, battle-scarred brutes spitting in their drinks as they spoke. She seemed thoroughly out of place in this environment, her face covered by her ten-gallon hat. She sat at the bar, an untouched glass of bourbon sitting beside her. She didn't drink, but buying something always made the bartender a little bit friendlier.
"So what're you lookin' for, missy?"
Nothing she could do about the sexism, but then again she was used to it by now. She took a tiny sip of the bourbon, resisting the urge to spit it back out.
"I'm looking for a woman. Have been for a while now."
The bartender laughed heartily at this. Apparently he'd come to the obvious conclusion, and it entertained him.
"Ohoho-! Didn't think you were that kinda lady. Well, can I suggest our lovely Lorleen? She's pretty darn cute if you ask me~"
He pointed to the bar's singer, some woman in her mid-thirties whose performance felt like a funeral dirge. The girl's fingers rubbed at her temple.
"No, that's not what I meant."
Now came the important part. Dropping the name.
"Does the name Maryberry Han ring a bell to you?"
Silence. Total, utter, silence. Every single man in the room turned to face her, hands unconsciously moving towards their firearms. The bartender's smiling face was replaced with concern.
"...I'm hoping I didn't hear ya right there. Who'd you say you were lookin' for?"
"Maryberry Han. ...I assume you've heard of me."
The bartender instinctively took a step backwards. The glass he was cleaning fell to the floor.
"...R-Renko Usami..."
Her cover blown, Renko decided there was no point in hiding herself. She tipped up her hat, revealing her piercing brown eyes to the bar's regulars.
"Oh, you people know who I am? I'm touched."
One of the thugs got to his feet - a lanky, overgrown man with maybe three teeth in his mouth. He looked down at Renko with strong but dull eyes.
"You ain't welcome here, girly. Get yer ass outta here."
Renko didn't make an effort to respond, simply picking up her glass of bourbon. She stared down in to the dark, viscous substance as the goon came closer.
"Hey! You listenin'?!"
She waited for as long as possible, letting him get close enough that she could feel the putrid stench of his breath fill her nose.
Then, in a simple motion, she swung the glass at him. It crashed majestically, sending him falling to the floor.
After that, things happened very, very quickly.
A dozen guns were drawn at once, all pointed in one direction. Twelve bullets were fired at once, all aimed at Renko, but she had miraculously placed herself where every single bullet would miss her.
In truth, it was no miracle. This was Renko's sole definiting trait as a gunslinger - she could track the path of any bullet that flew her way, and from that she could easily find a safe spot to stand. These guys had made it easy for her - all it took was one step to the left and she escaped totally unharmed.
"My turn."
She pulled out her own gun, a pristine Colt .44, quickly firing at the first thug she saw. The gang was too stunned by her survival to react, and she took down three of their numbers before they started to return fire. Again, Renko avoided their bullets with amazing grace, picking off the occasional thug during a break in fire.
She made no effort to hide, even having the gall to reload in plain sight, but despite their best efforts the gang was unable to land a single shot on her. Within a minute they had been reduced to a single, desperate thug who let out a little yip when he realised he was out of ammunition. His hand quickly reached into a side pocket, but that did nothing to stop Renko from shooting the gun from his other hand.
"What the hell is she?!"
He jumped to grab the gun, but before he could get there Renko had caught onto him by the neck. For a girl her size she was surprisingly strong.
"So, are you feeling a little more talkative now?"
He felt cold steel being held against his forehead. Immediately he was reduced to a stuttering wreck.
"S-S-Seriously! I don't know nothin'! I just got told by the boss to get ridda you!"
The barrel pressed harder against his head.
"Who's your boss?! Why'd they take Mary!?"
The thug panicked.
"H-H-Hey, I ain't stupid! No way I'd tell you 'bout Miss Yakumo! She'd kill me if I told ya 'bout he-"
Renko smiled.
"Thank you~"
She punched him in the face once, sending him crashing to the floor. There was an eerie moment of silence as Renko stood alone amongst a sea of dead goons.
The bartender, noticing the skirmish was over, got up from behind the counter. He wore a look of sheer awe at the sight.
"You...what are you?"
Renko, still totally relaxed, tipped her hat to him.
"Just a traveller, that's all. Like I said, I'm looking for someone."
She reached down to one of the bodies, pulling out a wallet. She placed it on the counter, next to where she had previously had her glass of bourbon.
"That should make up for the glass. See you 'round."
Renko had already started on her way to the door before she'd even started to talk. The bartender was too stunned to make any sort of response, simply staring at her as she walked out the door.
"...That girl...she's a gunfighting prodigy. Never gonna see one quite like her again..."
---
Renko sighed to herself as she swung the bar doors behind her. She had a name, but it wasn't as if anyone was going to tell her anything about it willingly.
"But then again...that's why I've got this."
She patted the Colt tenderly, like a mother to a newborn child. She started off down the road again, wondering where this journey was going to take her next. Whether the next bar would finally show a friendly face, or just another bunch of bad guys to take out.
"...Don't worry, Mary. I'm coming for you."
-
[21:46] <Sana> Wh-
[21:47] <Sana> You...you actually used the name Maryberry?
[21:47] <Sana> ROU YOU ARE AMAZING
-
[20:50] <Sana> Best ever
[20:50] <Jana> I'm glad you agree~
-
Splendid~
-
Freakin' excellent.
Now I'm thinking of spaghetti Western Touhou.
... 西方, if you will.
-
... 西方, if you will.
...
COWBOY VIVIT
ROU
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS
-
Halloween special. Wanted to spend longer on this, but I got caught up in the Ijiyatsu dialogue discussion. >_>
-----
Even with the door as tightly barred as it was, the groaning still made it through the walls. The moans of the living dead filled the Palace of the Earth Spirits, striking terror into all who heard it.
Or at least, it would have if they hadn't already been listening to it for the last three hours. By now it was getting ever so slightly repetitive.
"I can't believe how stupid they are," muttered Satori, looking down on the masses from a window. Their main tactic of approach seemed to be 'walk into the wall until it falls over', and it was working just about as well as a plan like that normally works. Besides a few splinters in the door, there was no threat of them getting in.
Naturally, something like this could only be Orin's fault.
"Remind me again why exactly you decided to do this?"
The catgirl twiddled her fingers, looking away. Her tails started to swerve side-to-side as her brain struggled to produce a decent excuse.
"Uh, well...see, I found this weird book with all these strange runes on the cover, right? All I did was take a peek inside! And look up a spell that seemed kinda cool. And spend three weeks preparing the ritual before performing it. Which accidentally ended up summoning a horde of zombies. That's not too weird, is it, nya?"
Apparently Orin had realised there was no point trying to lie to Satori, so she just spoke the truth while garnishing it slightly. Utsuho was too busy holding her arm out, aiming at crowds of the shuffling moaners with a manic glint in her eyes.
"Can I fire yet, Satori-sama? Pleeeease~?"
Satori shook her head at Utsuho for what must have been the hundredth time.
"No, Okuu, you can't. You don't have enough control over your power, so firing here will take the three of us out as well."
"Oh."
Silence.
"...How about n-"
"NO."
Satori, trying to ignore the raven as much as possible, turned back to the accidental necromancer.
"Look, is there any-"
"BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!"
A notably loud cry interrupted Satori's question as one zombie called out. It was a fairy, barely possessing enough strength to hold itself together. Actually, it seemed to have failed at that as well, given that it was missing a limb here or there.
It was here Satori showed just how impressive her ability was. She'd seen the mind of that witch, and from that the mind of her kappa friend, who happened to have played a game featuring characters in a similar position to this. Her third eye blinked once, and instantly she was holding a handgun and inexplicably wearing a blue beret. She pointed the gun at the loudmouth zombie, expertly putting a bullet between its eyes as it crumbled to dust.
"Wow, Satori-sama. Who are you meant to be exactly, nya?"
"I don't know, but I have a sudden urge to pick a lock while eating a sandwich."
"Hey, that was pretty cool, Satori-sama. Mind if I try to-"
"Yes I do, actually."
"Awwwwwwww."
Keeping the gun in her hand (and somehow resisting the urge to shoot Utsuho with it), Satori cocked her head around to look at Orin.
"As I was saying before, is there any sign of backup?"
Orin's face fell.
"Nope...Koishi-sama's missing as usual. Everyone else has evacuated the underground...I think we're the last people alive."
Satori grimaced. They hadn't stored any food in the palace given that there were so many stores nearby, so there was no way they could hope to hold out for any length of time. And given long enough, the door would eventually give way and the beasts would make it in after all.
"Any way to reverse the spell?"
"They mention some legendary human who defeated the zombies with the power of dance...but I don't think we can do that."
For a moment, she considered putting the gun to her own head and pulling the trigger, but thoughts of Orin and Okuu stopped her. Not in front of them. She had to act strong now, for their sakes.
"ANYONE STILL LIVING WITHIN THE FORMER RESIDENCE OF HELL, LISTEN. THIS IS SHIKIEIKI YAMAXANADU."
A blaring voice suddenly filled the palace, louder than even the zombie's cries. It was coming from some unseen loudspeaker in the distance.
"WE HAVE RECEIVED INFORMATION ON THE CRISIS. HELP HAS BEEN SENT."
Satori smiled. They were going to make it out after all-
"AND PROMPTLY EATEN BY THE NIGH-INFINITE ZOMBIE HORDE."
She scratched that previous statement.
"AS SUCH, WE HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO RESORT TO TOTAL ANNIHILATION. A BOMB HAS BEEN PLANTED AND POSITIONED PRECISELY TO DESTROY THE ENTIRE AREA, ENSURING ABSOLUTE ERADICATION OF THE ZOMBIE MENACE. YOU HAVE THIRTY MINUTES TO EVACUATE THE UNDERGROUND."
The voice crackled into silence as the warning came to an end. Satori's hands started to shake against her will, her fear seeping out despite her attempts to act brave. It would take twenty minutes to get out on foot, assuming no obstacles, so getting out in half an hour now of all times...
"...Orin, Okuu."
A new coldness was present in Satori's voice. Her pets turned to her with a newfound sense of respect. They didn't need to ask what the new plan was - the fact Satori was walking downstairs said it all.
The three of them stood at the door, watching as the occasional collision caused it to bounce at the hinges. Orin had armed herself with her trusty cat-cart, with a few knives hastily tied to the front, while Utsuho trusted her third leg to do the work for her. Satori held the handgun tightly, cursing as she realised that this form didn't come with extra ammo.
"Whatever you do, don't look back. If you manage to break away from the pack, run like hell."
The pets nodded, still quaking in fear slightly. It'd be a lie for Satori to say she didn't feel the same, but she had a small luxury in that her heart was the only one that no-one else could read.
"Okay, then. One."
Satori held onto the door's handle, shuffling it slightly.
"Two."
Orin and Utsuho braced themselves. There was silence besides the wailing and moaning of the undead.
"THREE!"
So began Satori Komeiji's last stand...
-
*applause*
I dunno what the "pick a lock while eating a sandwich" thing is, though :o
-
*applause*
I dunno what the "pick a lock while eating a sandwich" thing is, though :o
I think it's a reference to the legendary "YOU WERE ALMOST A JILL SANDWICH!" line. :S
Also, Jill is the master of unlocking!
Edit: The blue beret line is another reference to RE, Ruro. Jill Valentine (http://ui14.gamespot.com/2093/jillmvc2_2.jpg) wears a beret.
-
"They mention some legendary human who defeated the zombies with the power of dance...but I don't think we can do that."
(http://img510.imageshack.us/img510/525/marisajackson.jpg)
I don't get the blue beret reference one bit, so that means it's probably a video game. Regardless, well done. Shikieiki showing up in Chireiden made me giggle.
-
Warning - This story
may or may not make made Sana cry.
---
Twelve o'clock. Right on time.
Renko took a deep breath as she stepped through the hospital's automatic door, biting her lip. She'd been doing this for some time now, but it still stung a little every time she came here. The receptionist turned to her with a look of recognisation.
"Good afternoon, how can I help- oh, Miss Usami! Good to see you again."
Being recognised around here was probably a bad sign, but Renko didn't dwell on it. She nodded, weakly returning the welcome.
"R-Right. Just here for the usual."
The receptionist nodded, understanding.
"Alright. You know where to go by now, surely."
Renko bowed, feeling awkward as she started down the corridor. She caught the eyes of doctors passing by, looking at her with expressions of pity. They knew who she was - more importantly, they knew who she was here to see.
Stopping in front of the same room as always, Renko knocked lightly on the door.
"Come in~."
A cheerful voice called out to her from the other side, as it had every other time. Slowly she pulled the door open, stepping inside and greeting the patient.
"Hi, Mary."
She was draped in her normal patient's robe - a bright violet colour, as she'd insisted - with her long blonde hair hanging down. She smiled, as if meeting Renko over trivial matters like a simple lunch.
"Good afternoon, Renko. It's always nice seeing you."
Her cheeriness had the opposite on Renko from what was intended. Seeing her so happy in her current state left Renko wondering if she'd ever get out of here. Mary seemed eager regardless, intent on talking whether her friend wanted her to or not.
"So, shall I tell you about last night's dream? I know you're the only one who'll listen to me, Renko. Everyone else labels me a lunatic, but we're the only two who truly understand. After all, we're the Sealing Club, the only ones who can make out the boundaries of Genso-"
"Maybe you should calm down a little first."
Renko always hated when she was like this. She had played along with Mary to an extent, so maybe she was partially to blame for what had happened. Mary had convinced herself that this fantastical realm of Gensokyo actually existed, and that she visited it in her dreams, to the point where she would ridicule anyone who suggested otherwise. Perhaps it wasn't possible to study psychology without being a little 'out there' yourself, but Renko hadn't considered that and fed Mary what she'd wanted to hear. And this was the result - her best friend had wound up in a mental hospital, declared nigh-incurably insane.
"...Ah, I'm sorry."
Mary apologised lightly, lowering her voice as she began her tale. This one was new to Renko, the story of a mysterious ship that had appeared in the sky, and the fantastic creatures who lived in it, and their goal to revive their mistress from beyond the gates of Makai. Renko had to admit, if Mary was making this up she had a very active imagination - every character had their own personality, and she described them down to the last detail, leaving nothing unconsidered or unmentioned. By now the recurring characters in these stories (such as the Hakurei shrine maiden and the black-white witch) had become familiar to Renko, but she took some enjoyment in hearing about the latest characters that Mary had created.
...I just wish she didn't seriously believe what she was saying, though...
"So, isn't that amazing?"
Finishing her story, Mary's smile widened. She was convinced that Renko was the one person she could truly be honest around - the one person she knew who believed in Gensokyo. Perhaps she had once, playfully, but not to the almost fanatic extent that Mary did. She gave a weak nod, ungenuine but with concern.
"Yeah, Mary. It sure is."
Mary seemed proud, standing upright a little further. Maybe being so close to all these skeptics had had its effect on her. Renko hoped not.
"Thanks. ...Man, I'm tired."
Mary yawned dramatically, slumping back down as quickly as she'd risen.
"Renko, I think I'll take a nap. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
Renko tried her best to smile again, nodding as she made her way out. As soon as she'd turned away, she let her face fall without fear.
"...Right. ...Bye, Mary."
"Bye~!"
Renko carefully closed the door behind her, as Mary started to brace herself for sleep. She wondered what sort of amazing sights she'd see in Gensokyo today, what stories she'd have to tell Renko tomorrow...
---
She rose.
Beneath her, the body of Mary lay in bed, snoring lightly. The patient's robes had grown in length and complexity to fit her, and the ordinary white mop hat had been given an extra red ribbon for flair.
"...So it's my turn again."
She stepped off the bed, or at least she attempted to, but her foot simply phased through to the ground beneath her. She sighed, having never really become used to this immaterial feeling. It would pass once she crossed the border, anyway.
She looked down at Mary, still as innocent and convinced of herself as ever as she slept. She frowned.
"...There's nothing worse I could have wished upon you. I'm sorry..."
She let a single tear drop down her face, leaving a single unexplained stain on the floor. Behind her, space itself tore open to leave a gap, a vast purple space beckoning her to step within.
And in a matter of seconds, Yukari Yakumo was gone.
-
/me bawls
MARYBERRY ;_;
-
I knew it was coming.
Mary's friggin CRAYzeeee
-
Damn it, I have to say I like your writing style.
Now I have to read this entire thread. Curse you.
-
I knew it was coming.
Mary's friggin CRAYzeeee
So she's a Lunatic? :V
-
So she's a Lunatic? :V
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH
-
Holy crap what is wrong with me why the hell did I write this
-----
Shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
It's gone.
Everything's gone. Everyone's gone. Kaput. Kablooey. Poof.
And I did it.
SHIT.
How was I meant to know this was going to happen? She told me that she needed me, that only I could handle the power. That damn god convinced me that I had what it took to absorb the Yatagarasu. I listened to her, trusted her.
And I let her words get to me.
Nuclear fusion is powerful, really powerful. I started thinking that having that power made me special, strong. I dreamt of restoring the old hells back to their former glory, turning the world above into a charred remain suitable for our new home. Gensokyo would burn in my name.
Satori-sama would never allow it, of course, so I kept it a secret from her. I avoided her, made sure that I was never in a position for her to read my heart. The thought of it would have disgusted her, but when all was said and done she would understand and accept it, right? She was my owner. That's what owners do, isn't it? Pat you, and hug you, and love you, no matter how many people you kill. Right?
...Maybe not.
Orin, though, I couldn't hide it from. Every so often as I worked in the blazing fires I could see her looking at me, worried. Concerned. She didn't understand it either, she acted as though my power was something to be feared. She was wrong - power is to be respected, flaunted! What's the point in being strong if you never use your strength!?
...But apparently she must have got the word out somehow, because days away from the plan's fruition there were intruders. A shrinemaiden in red and white, and a black magician, both from the surface. Humans, which was amazing enough, but humans that could fight on my level with ease, even with the blessing of the Yatagarasu.
I was mad, but first and foremost I was afraid. Yasaka's blessing had made me special. Unique. Almighty. For someone of my calibre to lose to mere humans was inexcusable. I could allow any disaster, any injustice, as long as in the end I was the winner.
So I made myself forget the first rule. The first thing that Yasaka told me after I received the Yatagarasu.
"Utsuho, you always need to keep your power in check. Not for your sake, but for the sake of those around you."
...I forgot that. I let my mind run free, released the subconscious restraints. I wished from the bottom of my heart that the two humans in front of me would drop dead.
I don't really remember what happened after that. I know there was a flash, but it lasted barely an instant.
Then I opened my eyes, and the humans were gone.
My first thought was joy. I'd won, I'd proven myself to be stronger. I flew back towards the palace, to tell Orin of my victory against those stupid humans who'd tried to mess with me.
I couldn't find her anywhere.
Come to think of it, I couldn't find anyone. No youkai, no fairies, not so much as a soul passing by. It was unusual - as old as this place had become, it had never felt so lonely.
Then I found the cart.
"...No. Oh, no."
The wood had turned black, charred through completely. Next to it, just below the handle, was a pile of ash with a black ribbon caught in it.
"No, no, no. Orin, no."
I knelt down, fingering through the ashes. This was a prank, a joke, she'd pop out in a second and laugh at me, she had to. This couldn't be real. I wasn't that powerful...was I?
I rushed back to the palace, looking for someone to tell me that everything was okay. All I found was confirmation of my own fears - more blackened buildings, and no sign of any sort of life. I wanted to just collapse and cry right there, but adrenaline pushed me into the building regardless.
"S-Satori-sama!"
She had to be okay. She was strong, stronger than me, she would have survived. I ran into her room, not bothering with courtesy at a time like this.
"Satori-sa-"
The word hung in my mouth as I looked inside. Satori-sama was nowhere to be found, but her silhouette had been imprinted on the now-black wall. On the floor was another pile of ash, but something still writhed in it.
A red, pulsing, bloodshot eye.
"U...uuuuu..."
I moaned in the most pathetic way possible. I wanted to throw up, but I barely kept the urge in check as I ran away again. This was too horrible. I couldn't stay here any longer, and before I knew it I was breaking for the surface.
I saw more signs of where there had once been life as I fled the underground. A sake bowl lying shattered on the ground, its contents evaporated. A burning bridge, its guardian blown away. An empty bucket hanging from a spider's web. It was tragic, too tragic.
And it was my fault.
When I reached the surface, I wasn't looking for forgiveness. I wasn't looking for redemption. I just wanted someone else to come up to me and ask why I was crying, for someone else to be ALIVE.
Imagine my horror to find that my power had extended to above the surface as well.
"N...no..."
Trees had become black, rotting husks. Rivers had run dry, tiny puddles of yellow liquid being all that remained. The sky had faded to a dark red, almost in irony. The ground beneath me was wiped clean of plant life, leaving just barren rock.
Nothing lived but me. Even the immortals were gone, without a single cell to regenerate themselves from.
I was alone.
I fell to my knees, and cried. I screamed, knowing that no-one could hear me as I sobbed myself dry. If Satori-sama saw me like this, she would think that I was pathetic.
...I suppose it's a good thing that she can't, then.
So here I am, alone in a world of ashes. My own personal hell.
...Heh, when I put it that way it sounds sort of like what I'd always wanted, doesn't it? Gensokyo really has become one charred, beaten furnace, like I had dreamt of only days ago.
And it's mine.
All mine.
And if I think about it, Orin loved working with the dead...cremation would've been how she wanted to go. So maybe I did her a favour.
Yes.
So there's nothing to be guilty about.
I didn't kill her.
I helped her.
I HELPED her.
...Heh.
Hahah.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
-----
Yeah, I think someone needs to lend me a straitjacket.
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Oh snap.
Crazy Utsuho. O_O
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This is eerily similar to something else I had planned... Curse you, Rou! Stop stealing my ideas from the collective unconscious!
Great job as always.
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utsuho, how could you!
ohh well even lunatic version can be too much for reimu and marisa.
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Commenting so I can keep track of this thread and read everything. :3 Hi Rou-nyan~
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Jesus Christ Byakuren Hiziri.
GJ
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"Ah, another fine day in Gensokyo over and done with~"
Yukari Yakumo rose perkily, contrary to popular belief. Though she had a nasty habit of sleeping through the day, when night came around she woke with ease. Not bothering with the common nuisance of doors, she opened up a gap beneath herself and emerged in the kitchen, fully clothed. It was at the same time incredibly lazy and supremely efficient.
"Ah, good evening, Yukari-sama."
Ran was waiting for her, as she always was at this time of day. The years had done little to her complexion, or to her enthusiasm to serve as she continued to work on a serving of tofu for her mistress's (very late) breakfast. Her fox-tails trailed along happily behind her as she worked, while Yukari took a seat at the table.
"Evening, Ran. Anything happen while I was asleep?"
This was one of Ran's primary duties as a shikigami. While Yukari could intend to be as good a guardian to Gensokyo as possible, even she needed time to recuperate. Ran was charged with watching over affairs while her mistress slumbered. Tonight she answered the question with a smile.
"A few things, but nothing to worry about, Yukari-sama. A little scuffle outside of the human village, but that's hardly out of the ordinary."
"Oh, that'll be Houraisan and Fujiwara again. Still going at it, huh?"
"I can't hope to inquire into the minds of those two. They're both incurably insane."
Ran's ability to both speak and cook was a good chunk of why Yukari valued her so much as a shikigami. She continued.
"The Moriya shrine chose a successor today. A young girl from the human village who the gods apparently smiled upon."
"A successor, already?" Yukari laughed. "Little Sanae must really be getting on."
"She is descended from a god, Yukari-sama. I would not be so hasty to write her off."
There was a quiet chuckle between the two, followed by an awkward silence. Ran's tone dropped slightly.
"Also...the procession was today."
"Oh." Yukari suddenly didn't feel hungry any more. "So...I missed it?"
"Don't worry, you hardly knew the girl. All the magicians were there, though, mourning her, and that kappa as well. You have to wonder why she never took up their offer..."
"Humans are strange, strange creatures. I can't say anything beyond that."
Neither of them felt an urge to continue the conversation after that. The quiet tapping of Ran's spoon against the pot was all that broke the silence. There was only one obvious path for this discussion to go down, and neither of them wanted to touch it.
Yukari and Ran both felt a silent relief as they heard a pair of eager feet running down the corridor.
"Yaaaaaay! Dinner!"
Chen dashed into the room, her shoes still slightly muddy. Ran would probably lecture her on that later, but right now her presence was too appreciated for that to come to the kitsune's mind.
"...Aw, tofu again? We have that every night, nyaa..."
Chen had grown into a fine young woman, but she'd never quite moved beyond her childish fashion sense, wearing the same simple shirt and cap as had for years. The only difference was that she was a good deal taller now, and there was some cleavage to fill the shirt out with.
"Now, now, Chen. I've told you plenty of times already, and I'll tell you again - you need a good balanced diet if you want to grow properly!"
"But Ran-sama, I'm a big girl now! I don't wanna eat tofu anymore! I wanna eat more fish, nya!"
"Then why don't you make it yourself for a change? Beggars can't be choosers, you know."
Chen pouted, but didn't bother to argue back. It was only a semi-serious argument, anyway, because the pair never really fell out. Chen sat opposite Yukari at the dinner table, tapping her feet in anticipation for food. She did like tofu, honestly, she just liked fish more.
Her timing was excellent, because a few minutes later Ran had laid out plates of fried tofu in front of both Yukari and Chen. The mistress of the house, though, simply stared at her meal, her eyes looking into the distance. Chen was too busy getting started on eating to notice, but Ran detected her mistress's unease and repaid it in kind.
"...Yukari-sama. Are you not hungry?"
Yukari startled, as if being woken from a dream. She hastily pulled a smile, doing her best to relieve the nervousness.
"N-No, not really...I just thought you looked so happy cooking, I couldn't bring myself to stop you. Ehehe..."
Ran's brow furrowed. She didn't buy the excuse, her worries only strengthening. Chen, still oblivious, chomped at her tofu fervently.
A few quiet minutes passed.
"...I'm going out."
Yukari slid away from the table, her tofu still untouched.
"Another visit?"
Ran didn't need to make her query any more precise than that. Yukari nodded.
"Right. ...It might be the last one."
"You always say that, Yukari-sama."
"That's because every one might be the last one."
"...I doubt that."
For the first time, a rebellious, disapproving tone entered the fox's voice. Yukari bit her lip. She hated talking about it - she couldn't mention it here, not with Ran, and definitely not in front of Chen. She quickly opened a gap, practically flinging herself through and closing it behind her. Ran continued to stare at the spot where the gap had been, as if frozen in place.
"...Hey, Ran-sama? Is Yukari-sama going to finish her tofu?"
A prod on the shoulder brought Ran back to reality, as Chen asked for seconds. She pulled a brave face, for her shikigami's sake first and foremost.
"...No, Chen. Yukari-sama is...busy."
-----
It was cold outside.
Winter had rolled in, but the last orange leaves of autumn still hung around the courtyard. Yukari stepped out of the gap, her feet making a tiny 'scrunch' sound as they pressed against the leaves. Immediately she pulled her foot up, afraid she was being too loud at this time of night, but she soon dismissed that as paranoia and stepped out completely.
The maid was here, as usual. She bowed to Yukari in a doll-like, almost mechanical fashion. She made an unusual creaking sound as she bent, like a joint that needed to be oiled desperately.
"Greetings, Yakumo-san. My master awaits you."
Yukari tried to brush her off with another fake smile. She'd hoped that the machine wouldn't be able to detect the falsehood, but the shifty eyes that stared at her as she moved further in suggested otherwise.
What had changed? She pondered as she walked through the old wooden corridors, long-ago neglected and forgotten. Once, Yukari's smile had been genuine enough to fool anyone she knew. Now it was nothing but a facade which anyone with half a brain cell could see through. Was smiling really that difficult?
Or...had she lost a reason to smile?
"...Eh, Yukari. Is that you?"
Apparently her footsteps had been pretty loud after all, because she'd been heard. Yukari slipped the last door open, her eyes immediately falling on an old woman. The voice was weak physically, but the last fragments of a youthful spirit still hung behind it. Her appearance gave much the same idea - a simple bright red robe, if no longer sporting the ambitious open sleeves she had several years previously. Yukari sat down with her, trying her best not to focus on the aged form of a girl she'd known so well.
"...Yeah. It's good to see you again, Reimu."
-----
Jeez, I keep writing such downbeat stuff. I wanna write something happyyyyyyy~
Second part may or may not be out tonight, depending on how quickly it comes to me.
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...
Is this perhaps related to a certain doujin?
It fits rather nicely...
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Ah, one of those stories.
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I can't really find anything wrong with your writing. It's good!
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Posting so I can be reminded later that this exists so I can continue reading~
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Gah I've had no time to write this, so here I am coming up with an update while I wait for the bus back home -_-
-----
"I can't keep having you over every single night, Yukari. Even tea costs money, even if it isn't a lot."
Reimu let out a deep sigh, wheezing lightly. It sounded like it was a difficult task, especially compared to Yukari's light, easy breathing. The shrine maiden took a deep breath, calling out to the corridor.
"Ruukoto, two of the usual, please."
The sound of slow, deliberate footsteps came from outside as Reimu's old maid did her work. She had meant to take better care of her, but maintenance was expensive and so Ruukoto had started to age and decay much in the same was she had. The sound of a thump against the wall, followed by a pair of cups hitting the floor, was enough to pass that message onto Yukari.
"Her navigation is faulty. She'll get it eventually."
Reimu seemed unfazed, though recently it seemed like nothing was able to affect her in the slightest. She treated every mishap, every trouble with the same cool efficiency, totally disconnected and impersonal. That was enough to irritate Yukari - that wasn't how the Reimu she knew would have responded - her Reimu would have taken every mistake as a personal insult, declared it an 'incident' and beaten down whoever was responsible. Reckless, yes, but it was that youthful spirit that she missed more than anything.
Now, in her old age, Reimu was alone. The Hakurei Shrine had been almost forgotten, overtaken by the outsiders, the Moriya. A few faithful believers offered donations once in a while, but what they offered was barely enough for Reimu to survive from. Yukari had offered her money several times over, but Reimu had insisted that she could stand on her own two feet on the donations alone. The youkai wondered how long Reimu spent just sitting in here, staring at the walls of the room blankly, too tired to stand up and too poor to buy anything to preoccupy herself with.
"So, Reimu, how's today been? Any sign of your oni friend?"
"What, Suika? She still hasn't come back, no...I'm pretty sure she's off drinking with Yuugi right now, same as always."
Suika, unsurprisingly, had also been much slower to age than Reimu, and very quickly it turned out the shrine maiden could no longer keep up with her binge drinking antics. She had retreated to the old hells, promising to visit any time she was sufficiently sober to make her way back to the surface. That had been several years ago, and there was no sign of her yet.
Yukari frowned. She quickly wished she hadn't asked, but if the query had affected Reimu in any way her face certainly didn't show it. She murmured a neutral response, seeing no reason to apologise.
"Ah. I...see."
Why is she still so calm?
Yukari almost wished that Reimu HAD taken offense to what she'd said, just to prove that beneath this stoic shell the young girl she'd known was still buried deep under there. Failing that, she sat in silence waiting for Ruukoto to figure out how to open the door. It took her a few minutes, but eventually the maid entered carrying two cups of green tea. She spilt half their contents on the table as she put them down, her hands jittering uncontrollably.
"As you requested, Reimu-sama."
Reimu nodded, ignoring Ruukoto's failing completely. She slowly motioned her out of the room with her right hand, and the maid took the hint and left the two of them to talk. Yukari picked up her tea and sipped at it cautiously. She had to resist the urge to spit it right back out - there was more or less no tea in it at all. She'd practically been served heated water, but she struggled and swallowed it. Across from her, Reimu enjoyed her beverage far more than Yukari did, savouring the few traces of flavour that lingered in the 'tea'.
Yukari still didn't feel like talking. She had her reasons for visiting, but conversation wasn't one of them. Speech just reminded her too much of how Reimu had changed so drastically, while she had stayed more or less the same. It was a subject she wanted desperately to stay away from, but as Reimu lowered her cup she found herself thrown into it against her will.
"So, I hear they had Marisa's funeral today?"
Yukari flinched.
Of all the things she had to bring up...
-----
More later, if by some miracle I have enough time to sit down and write. -_-
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Why ;-;
My beautiful shrine maiden and her shrine and her cute robot and
;-;
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-- ohhhhh. One of THOSE those fics.
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Finished in time to save the topic from hitting page 2!
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Yukari was half-tempted to lie there and then. Tell Reimu that she was mistaken, that the funeral hadn't happened yet, and that she should just go to bed and stop worrying about silly things like that. Then she saw the copy of the Bunbunmaru sitting in the corner of the room and realised that strategy was doomed from the start.
"...Yes. It was today."
"What was it like?"
Reimu's voice was as neutral as it had been before, even when discussing the death of one of her closest friends. Yukari swallowed, wishing she could just gap herself away and never come back.
But she couldn't. She had reasons to be here, and so she had to wait it out.
"...There was a procession through the Forest of Magic. They carried her through the woods - or at least Byakuren did, she was strong enough that no-one else really needed to help. They put her broom and hakkero in the coffin with her, and everyone gave their own little speech about how she was friendly, and heartwarming, and-"
"You didn't attend, did you?"
Yukari froze.
"W-What are you talking about? How could I-"
"You think I can't see your eyes? You're reading the Bunbunmaru article."
Reimu was, as usual, completely and utterly correct. Yukari had been staring at the paper from the other side of the room, reading it with her superior youkai eyesight. She'd hoped the shrinemaiden would assume that she was simply nervous and didn't want to look her head-on.
"Ah."
What was she meant to do now? She'd been caught in a lie, so the best thing she could probably do was try to make an excuse and retreat.
"W-Well, no. I didn't. I never really knew Marisa, so I didn't think it was worth going..."
Maybe she could pull this conversation onto another subject. A lighter one-
"You're lying again. Your eyes."
Or not.
"...What are you talking about, Reimu? I'm not looking anywhere this time-"
"That's not what I meant."
Reimu sipped at her tea, looking straight through Yukari with a determination that defied her physical age. It was stronger than any expression she'd seen from the human for some time.
"Yukari, I know you. I know you better than anyone. Whenever you lie, your eyes widen just a tiny bit."
She returned to sipping her tea, as if what she'd said was something completely irrelevant. Yukari was speechless. When had Reimu started deceiphering every little tell she had? Did she have nothing else to do now? Was it something to keep her senses sharp?
No. None of that mattered now. Reimu placed the cup on the table, looking straight at her again.
"So there was another reason you didn't go. What was it?"
Yukari looked away, feeling sweat run down her face. She couldn't lie, not now, Reimu would figure her out. But she couldn't tell the truth either - that would give it all away, it would ruin everything...in the end, she settled for a nervous silence. Reimu heaved a sigh.
"Hmph. I expected as much."
Reimu leaned her head over the table, struggling to bend slightly. Yukari pulled her head over to meet it, as Reimu placed her lips against the youkai's ear. The two words that came out were practically silent.
"You're scared."
Immediately Yukari's blood ran ice-cold. She jerked her head back into place, trying to throw a swig of tea down her throat to calm herself down. She was too jittery to even get a decent grip on the cup. Reimu returned to her former position slowly and calmly, clarifying her accusation.
"Death frightens you, doesn't it, Yukari? It's foreign to you. You, an immortal youkai destined to live and die along with Gensokyo."
Every word was a weight, and each one piled up on Yukari without relent. She found her head unnaturally turning to the floor.
"You knew that her funeral was today, and you went out of your way to avoid it. Her death frightened you, didn't it?"
Yukari was the nervous child to Reimu's maternal figure. An interesting reversal of roles, she would have thought were she not on the verge of tears. She nodded.
"But like you said, you didn't really know Marisa. So her death meant something else to you. It reminded you that we humans get old, and we die."
Her eyes grew more intense still, completely out of place in her frail body. For a moment, Yukari thought that Reimu was the young, reckless teenager she still remembered.
"It reminded you of me, didn't it?"
This time Yukari didn't pause, nodding her head obediently. There was no use in hiding anything anymore. She did her best to keep her sobbing as quiet as possible as tears slipped into her tea.
"I...I don't want you to go..."
There was no trace of the cheery old Yukari in her voice anymore, and her words came out in one long, pathetic wail. Reimu nodded.
"...Well, that's pretty damn obvious. Pull your head up, grandma."
The last word took a few seconds to register.
"Ah..."
Carefully, Yukari raised her head and looked Reimu in the eye again. What she saw was the first genuine grin Reimu had pulled in years.
"Good to know I'm still worth something to you even when I'm falling apart, I guess."
She sounded energetic, excited. It was probably exhausting for her to even talk like this, but she was making the effort just for her.
Yukari smiled. For a moment, an instant, she forgot everything. Forgot that Reimu wasn't who she was anymore. That Gensokyo wasn't the same place now as it had been then. Reimu had listened to her, had understood her feeling, now they could do this forever and ever and ever...
"But...maybe I'm worth a little too much to you."
Then, once again, Reimu pulled her out of her daydream.
"W...What do you mean...?"
Reimu cracked her neck, making loud and painful-sounding noises that left Yukari wincing. She grit her teeth, cursing her weak muscles silently.
"I may be an old woman, Yukari, but I'm no fool. I'm still a maiden of the Hakurei border. I can feel the changes being made in it, no matter how small."
Yukari's mouth went dry. She knew what was coming next, but she didn't want to hear it.
"I know what you're doing here every day. You're disturbing my boundary of life and death."
In an instant, everything collapsed.
Her plans. Her dreams. Her love.
Everything.
-----
For some reason, Yukari didn't do what she had expected to do and collapse into tears. Perhaps she had simply been hurt so badly that her emotions had gone full circle. Now it was her turn to stare blankly into Reimu's eyes.
"...How long have you known?"
"Since you started. Five years ago."
Yukari had noticed some time ago that Reimu's natural lifespan was reaching its end. It had been an easy job to make an excuse to visit, and at that time make a simple alteration to her boundary, but out of fear of being discovered she reduced herself to a day at a time. She had hoped the change would be too small for Reimu to notice.
Apparently she'd been wrong.
"Why...why didn't you say anything?"
Reimu was quiet for a moment. She sipped at her tea.
"I didn't know if you were ready for it."
She had taken on the role of lecturing parent once again.
"Me, I've lived a good life. I'm happy with what I've done, and I'm set for passing on. Have been for a while now. The only thing holding me back, really, is you."
Yukari blinked. She was so numb that it was as close as she could get to emotion.
"...Do...do you want to die?"
It came out as a choked cry of desperation. A final, begging plea. Reimu shrugged.
"I died five years ago. You just haven't accepted it yet."
And that, from what it seemed, was the end of the discussion. Reimu returned to her tea, leaving Yukari to think her words over.
For a good ten minutes, neither of them spoke a word.
Then, slowly, Yukari rose to her feet. Her face remained completely blank.
"I think...I should go."
Reimu nodded. She pulled herself up, slowly walking around the table. She came right next to Yukari, looking up at her from her diminuitive height.
Then she wrapped her arms around her.
"Thanks."
Again, Yukari momentarily forgot the passage of time, feeling the young Reimu Hakurei's arms around her waist. She returned the gesture, being gentle as she did so, then breaking off and leaving before the image faded. That was how she wanted to remember her.
Ruukoto was waiting for her outside of the room. Yukari turned to the maid, giving one final order.
"Your mistress no longer needs your services. You may shut yourself down now."
"Understood."
Ruukoto's eyes slowly faded into darkness. She froze in place, becoming a lifelike statue as her systems turned themselves off for the last time.
Then, with a single step into a gap, Yukari was gone.
-----
Reimu sighed.
This day had been long overdue, she knew that. She finished the last drops of her cup of tea.
Disgusting stuff. She didn't know why she drank it.
With some effort, she managed to follow Yukari's path out of the room and continued on to the courtyard. It was a beautiful night, with the stars shining in full force and no clouds in sight. The old woman looked up, fascinated by the sight.
"...It was a night like this when I first met her, wasn't it."
She decided to lie on the flooring and look up at the stars. There were dozens, maybe hundreds to count, each one so small but fascinating. Like human lives, Reimu thought - tiny and seemingly irrelevant, but beautiful nonetheless.
"Heh. I'm getting sappy again."
She reprimanded herself for turning mushy. She'd mellowed in her later years, and to be honest she'd missed her old self as well, but nothing was permanent. Everything had its time.
Even her.
"...Hm...I'm feeling kind of sleepy..."
Reimu felt her eyes closing, her body growing weary. As she passed into slumber, she couldn't help but feel a peaceful finality about the whole thing.
-----
The Bunbunmaru issued a breaking news article as soon as the facts came to light. Reimu Hakurei, old and highly-esteemed shrine maiden of the Hakurei shrine, had died quietly in her sleep.
Aya Shameimaru wrote avidly about her, speaking of how she'd touched every resident of Gensokyo in some way or another. Some would say later it was the most heartfelt piece she had ever written, and that even coming off the press the paper was damp from the tears she cried as she wrote it.
Yukari was still numb as she read the article that morning, having stayed up for the night to keep herself informed. She had expected it, obviously, but it still shocked her to her core. She felt like something had come apart from her - something vital, something she needed to live.
"Yukari-sama...?"
Ran entered the room, her previous sternness gone. She had read the paper before Yukari got a hold of it, and was aware that her mistress had just been dealt a painful blow. She had disapproved of the manipulation of the border, but now that Reimu had passed on she had no time to argue about that. She had a mistress to comfort.
She sat next to Yukari, patting her on the shoulder.
"Chen? Come in here."
Chen answered the call quickly, darting into the room and looking at the pair confused.
"Nya? What's going on, Ran-sama?"
Ran motioned to her tearful mistress.
"Give Yukari-sama a hug with me. She needs it."
Chen nodded eagerly, unaware of the gravity of the situation. She snuggled up on one side of Yukari, Ran holding her gently from the other.
It took a while for her face to show it, but the warmth of her two shikigami slowly seeped through into Yukari. The blank expression gradually turned into a smile, and she wrapped her arms around Ran and Chen.
They weren't going to be around forever.
That was why she had to make the most of her time with them.
-----
"Yuyuko-sama, someone is here to see you."
"Hm? Youmu, who would be seeing me at a time like thi- oh."
"Morning. Sorry I'm late, I got a little held up. So, where's my nirvana?"
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Now I can stop feeling guilty and WRITE HAPPY THINGS
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"Morning. Sorry I'm late, I got a little held up. So, where's my nirvana?"
I can only hope this ends in violence.
GJ, Rou. Loved it.
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Yes, I approve of any and all posthumous rampages that may be fictionalized in compensation for making us cry.
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"Morning. Sorry I'm late, I got a little held up. So, where's my nirvana?"
That last sentence made my day. XD
@Yamaxanadu: ...
What of the people who didn't cry though. >_>
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The last sentence is amazing. Well played.
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@Yamaxanadu: ...
What of the people who didn't cry though. >_>
Those aren't people, they are empty shells that should crave the ability to be deeply moved by a depressing story.
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Those aren't people, they are empty shells that should crave the ability to be deeply moved by a depressing story.
Oh yay. DX
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"Morning. Sorry I'm late, I got a little held up. So, where's my nirvana?"
Took me a few seconds to get this, I was still in shock.
Dammit, Rou. You write way too well. My miko. ;-;
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X3
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Obligatory New Year Saccharine Sweet Fic, by Roukanken
"Bleh."
Reimu's eyes heaved open as her head complained to her loudly that something was wrong. She slowly became more and more aware of her surroundings.
Empty bottle in her hand? Check.
Splitting headache and an urge to vomit? Check.
A new calendar hanging on the wall? Check.
Yup. Last night was one hell of a party.
Somewhere down the line the Hakurei traditional New Year's festival had been made impure by the presence of alcohol. Not that Reimu had minded much - if beer was what brought people and their purses to her shrine, she'd gladly accept it whatever her scriptures told her? Didn't someone once say that necessity knew no law?
With some effort, Reimu pulled herself off the floor. Her hair was flowing freely behind her back - her ribbon had obviously gone missing sometime during the night, and she couldn't recall exactly where for the life of her. She slowly realised she was only wearing one sleeve.
"...Geez. I really am a lightweight."
Stumbling over to the shrine entrance, she performed her typical morning ritual of shaking the shrine's donation box. There was a pleasing rattle that momentarily cleared up the agonising headache. She daydreamt about her next trip into the village, a chance to buy herself something to eat that wasn't rice - maybe even something that wasn't a grain-
"Gah."
Then her head throbbed again, and all idealism was forgotten to make way for her pain. She leant on the box, rubbing her temples until it subsided.
There was a yukata lying in the courtyard. Given the colour scheme of light blue and white, she assumed it was the property of that ice fairy by the lake. She took a moment to consider whether Cirno was going to wake up wearing nothing tomorrow morning. The thought only served to make her head hurt even more.
"Huh...looks like the ema board survived the night, at least."
The shrine's wish-box had been left out for the night, since it was just about the only time enough people would show up for it to see any use. She hoped no-one had noticed the dust hanging on it, and decided to peek at the wishes people had made to the shrine.
Won't be anything private - otherwise they wouldn't have put it up here, right?
Sure enough, a good number of wishes had been written on the ema's wooden plates. The difference in handwriting was enough to show the diversity of Reimu's guests - some were immaculate signature-like wishes, while others were poorly written and worse spelt. Reimu was left with those in between to read.
"Man, all this stuff is so simple. Maintained employment, good health, success in business...doesn't anyone have any big ambitions anymore?"
Reimu frowned. The fact that she had fewer ambitions than any other resident of Gensokyo didn't stand out to her. She looked over the last of them, with little interest-
"Huh?"
One wish had been deliberately placed away from the rest, attracting Reimu's attention. She scanned it quickly, curious as to why it had been placed apart from the rest.
Then she read it again.
And again.
She pulled it off the ema, holding it up in front of her face and reading it from close up.
Is this...some sort of joke?
This was the alcohol talking, surely. No-one could seriously leave a wish like this in sound mental health. But regardless, the words stung her like a spear to the heart.
"I wish you could love me as much as I love you."
It was unsigned, leaving Reimu mystified. She hadn't seen anyone's handwriting enough to learn it eaither, so all she could tell was that the writer was literate. This was enough to remove a good number of Gensokyo's residents, but not enough to narrow it down completely.
T-This is crazy! It must be for someone else or something! It's gotta be!
She spun the plate around in case the signature was hidden.
It fell to the floor with a clatter as she finished reading the note on the back.
"-Yes, Reimu, I'm talking to you."
Reimu's mouth bobbed open, her headache a distant memory now. A hundred different faces flashed in front of her eyes, each one looking at her with a smiling face. Any of them could have been the one to leave this message for her.
But...how am I supposed to know who?
It couldn't be her. The odds were tiny. It wasn't possible...
"Hey, Reimuuuuuu..."
A low moan came from further inside the shrine, with a slightly whiny voice that Reimu recognised as Suika. The oni pulled the door open, walking out with her gourd impaled on one of her horns. Her dress was stained with alcohol, and she promptly tripped on the first stair down and hit the courtyard path with a thud.
"Ow. Stupid floor...always out ta get me."
Apparently Suika had a 'fun' night as well. She crawled along the ground to Reimu, apparently unable to stand straight.
"Hey...Happy New Year and all that crap. Just...wish I could remember any of it."
Reimu took a moment to respond to her, still stunned by her recent revelation.
"Y-Yeah. Happy New Year."
Suika lazily cast her eyes on the fallen ema, reaching over and standing it up so she could read it.
"Eh~? Reimu, you got a secret admirer or someth-"
"It's not like that, dumbass!"
Reimu kicked the oni in the gut. Suika quickly decided that any further comment was a bad idea and shut up.
"Geez. Don't come to conclusions like that."
Reimu crossed her arms in a childish tantrum. For a few seconds neither of them spoke.
"...You didn't write it, did you?"
Eventually Reimu's insecurity won out, though, and the question slipped out. Suika shook her head, skidding her chin along the paved stones.
"Nope. I was so wasted last night I wasn't in any state to drink, y'know? Sorry."
Reimu sighed, rubbing her temples again.
"If this is a joke, it's in pretty bad taste."
Her eyes slid up, looking at the clear blue sky that had welcomed them into the new year. The weather was chilly, but bearable. Nothing to look at besides a tiny speck in the distance-
Huh?
She'd assumed it to be a trick of the eye, but looking again she could definitely make out something hanging in the air. She couldn't see a shape of any sort, but she could feel a pair of eyes looking down on her. With mercy? Regret? She couldn't tell from here.
She squinted at the speck slightly, its shape become a little clearer.
"Ah-"
In an instant, a hundred faces became one.
"...So that's how it is."
She wondered for a moment if it was worth flying up to the speck for a closer look, but she decided to disregard the idea. Most likely they'd fly away, and even if they didn't it would be incredibly awkward.
"Well. Wonder when she'll work up the nerve to say it face to face."
She walked over to the ema board, pulling out a pen.
"Let's see here..."
---
"Dammit, Reimu. You're so stupid sometimes."
Marisa Kirisame bit her lip.
For a moment she was sure Reimu had looked up at her. Her heart had leapt as she hoped that she would come near, but she had turned away without a second thought. Had she really not put the pieces together?
"Maybe she thinks it's a joke. Heh, guess it'd seem like that to her if she knew it was me."
She wriggled around on the broom slightly, making herself more comfortable.
"She'd think I was closer to Alice, or Patchy, maybe even Nitori...I'm just a friend to her, aren't I."
For years, now, the two of them had worked together to resolve the various incidents that had plagued Gensokyo. In that time Marisa had come to know Reimu a true friend, and after that her feelings had blossomed into something more, something that she couldn't share. What if Reimu didn't understand? Didn't feel the same way? Then she'd lose everything.
"...I was hoping she'd figure it out from the ema...dammit, she's such an idiot."
Reimu had picked up another ema and started scribbling on it. Most likely it was a warning for people to stop putting up fake wishes, a sign that she'd missed the point entirely. As the shrine maiden hauled Suika back into the shrine, Marisa swooped back down into the courtyard. There was a tiny ounce of hope that kept her dream alive, the only thing stopping her from flying away now and never coming back.
"She put it...somewhere around here..."
She looked for Reimu's trademark handwriting, her hand sliding across the surface carelessly and lazily. She found it in exactly the spot where her own ema had been, probably as a replacement.
It took a lot of nerve for her to bring herself to read it.
It was well worth it.
"Ah...aah..."
Marisa's eyes started to well up as she grabbed the wooden plate from the board. She flipped it around, knowing for sure there had to be another note on the back. She read it as well, the tears coming to her eyes faster still.
"R-Reimu...you..."
She hugged the ema, crying openly now. If this was how things were set to keep on going, it was easily going to be the best year of her life.
"I wish you would stop being a scaredy-cat and just tell me outright.
-Yes, Marisa. I'm talking to you."
A pair of hands wrapped themselves around her firmly. She looked back with misty eyes to see Reimu holding her, smiling.
"Happy New Year, Marisa. I love you, too."
-
I smiled. So hard.
-
I smiled. So hard.
With (joyful) tears in my eyes ;_;
-
Judge Eiki by Roukanken
"I know for a fact that the book is missing."
What started as borrowing from a library...
"Aw, come on. She's just jealous 'cause she's found out it's worth a fortune."
...turned into theft of a priceless tome.
"She doesn't have anythin' saying that she lent it to me, you can't do a thing."
"Maybe you need to learn a little about authority, girl."
---
You are about to enter the courtroom of Judge Shikieiki Yamaxanadu.
The people are REAL.
The cases are REAL.
The rulings are FINAL.
This is her courtroom.
This...is Judge Eiki.
---
The courtroom was filled with a bustle of murmurs, the spectators and jurors muttering to each other. Silence only arose after the bailiff's declaration echoed throughout the room.
"All parties in the matter of Knowledge vs. Kirisame, step forward."
Komachi always hated this part. It took so much effort to shout loud enough to get everyone's attention, but at least she got to sit at the side for most of the trial. The two parties involved got the point, at least, and walked toward their respective positions.
574-year-old librarian Patchouli Knowledge is suing former lover, 16(?)-year-old Marisa Kirisame, for theft of a valuable book from her possession. Marisa claims that the book was a gift to her.
Both the plaintiff, a tired-looking girl in what seemed to be pyjamas, and the defendant, a cheery-looking witch in black and white, stood at attention behind their benches. Komachi turned to the judge's chair, waiting for her superior to emerge.
In a few seconds, the door next to the chair opened, and another woman entered. Her mostly civil clothing seemed befitting of a judge, but for some reason she had decided to come to court wearing a particularly short blue skirt. The entire court froze, staring at the exposed legs of the judge with various feelings - some with disgust, others with surprise, others still with amusement. Strangely, one woman responded by bleeding profusely from the nose and collapsing on the floor. The body was removed from the court for the sake of decency as the judge took her place behind the chair.
Komachi placed a small pile of papers in front of her boss.
"Case of Knowledge vs. Kirisame. They're sworn in, blah blah blah, sit the hell down."
She clasped her hand into a fist momentarily, threatening all present into their seats, before taking her own seat in the corner and falling asleep in a matter of seconds. Shikieiki frowned at her for an instant before turning back to the case.
"Alright then, Miss Knowledge," she said, turning to the plaintiff. "You claim that Miss Kirisame has taken a highly valuable book from you?
Patchouli nodded.
"Correct."
"What was the name of this book, exactly?"
"A History Of Charisma: The Autobiography of Remilia Scarlet."
Shikieiki blinked.
"Right. Well that's a little long, so I'll just call it Charisma for now."
She scribbled something down on the notes Komachi had handed her.
"You're sure it's missing? Totally?"
Patchouli gave the judge a condescending glare.
"I know for a fact that the book is missing. I keep regular notes of current stock. I lent it to her several weeks ago, and cleared it off the-"
"Okay, okay, I've seen these notes already, now shut up. I'm the one doing the lecturing around here."
"You can't say that, I have a right to make my voice he-"
Patchouli cut off mid-sentence, clutching her throat. She let off a small coughing fit, spluttering over the plaintiff's desk. The irony was not lost on either of them.
"S-Sorry. Continue, Your Honour."
"Thank you. Now, you there...Miss Kirisame."
Marisa was now leaning totally on her desk, making shapes in the dust with her finger as she looked into the distance.
"Sup, Lady? She's wrong, y'know."
Was she even aware that she was in a court? Shikieiki hit her judging rod against the desk to attract her attention. It worked, barely.
"Okay, okay, you want the whole formal thing. Gimme a minute to get in character."
She stood straight, taking deep breaths and performing dramatic hand motions. There was silence as the entire courtroom looked at her with expressions of bewilderment. Eventually she started on her testimony, overacting every little tidbit.
"Oh, it's terrible, Your Honour! I got that book as a gift from my lovely Patchy, and now she's trying to take it back from me just because she found out it'd make her a fortune! I'm being oppressed here, oppressed! It's an outrage, a sham! It's-"
The rod left a considerable dent in the desk as Shikieiki slammed it down again, much harder this time. Marisa's soliloquy was silenced.
"Cut the drama, woman. You're fooling no-one."
Marisa froze in place for an instant, caught in the middle of a swooping hand gesture. Then she pouted as the hand decided instead to clean out her ear.
"Meh. Thought it was worth a try, at least."
Judge Eiki's eyes grew smaller, as scorn started to run across her face.
"...so you hold to your earlier story, I assume."
"Aw, come on. She's just jealous 'cause she's found out it's worth a fortune."
Marisa gave a cheeky smirk to Patchouli, standing a few feet away. The librarian, furious, slammed her hand against the desk.
There was an audible crack across the courtroom.
Patchouli's head dipped down as she held back the urge to scream. She pulled her arm back, her hand hanging limp at her side.
Shikieiki took a short moment to place her head on the desk. It was moments like this that made her wonder what the point was in maintaining this job.
"Well..." she pulled her head up as she readdressed the court.
"No offense, Miss Kirisame, but your story is paper-thin. No-one has any reason to believe you're being genuine here."
Marisa seemed unfazed by this, now turning her smirk to the judge whose sentence could easily put an end to her.
"She doesn't have anythin' saying that she lent it to me, you can't do a thing."
It was the most pathetic work around possible. Because it had never been outright said that the book was lent in Patchouli's notes, she was clinging to the possibility that it was borrowed. Shikieiki's blood boiled.
"...Maybe you need to learn a little about authority, girl."
It was clearly a threat. Marisa looked up at the judge, puzzled.
"Eh? What're you-"
"Guilty."
A moment of silence.
"...Huh?"
"You're guilty. I've declared it officially."
Marisa seemed confused, bewildered by this verdict.
"B-But there's no outright evidence, right? There's reasonable doubt and all tha-"
"Quiet!"
Shikieiki's voice boomed through the room, magically amplified. Marisa's hat blew clean off of her head, leaving her clinging at her straw-like blonde hair.
"You are talking to Shikieiki Yamaxanadu, highest of the Judges of the Dead! If I say you're guilty, you're guilty, and you've got no right to complain! Do I make myself clear, mortal?!"
Marisa was cowering behind the desk now, looking up at the judge with fearful eyes.
"C-Clear as crystal, ma'am."
Her anger vented, Shikieiki returned calmly to her normal severe posture.
"Excellent. Now, since you've compounded your crime of grand theft with an additional charge of opposing a divine order, I'm going to have to invoke the death penalty."
"...Whuh?"
Shikieiki clicked her fingers. A panel above Marisa's head opened. Startled, the witch looked up to see a human shaped projectile coming at her at high speed, holding some sort of jewelled pagoda in her face.
"The hell-"
"ABSOLUTE JUSTICE, BITCH!"
Shou shouted at the top of her lungs as the pagoda's light expanded, exploding into a pillar of light that engulfed both the tiger youkai and the defendant. In a few seconds the light had dissipated, and Shou was standing behind the defendant's stand, saluting. Marisa was nowhere to be seen.
"Mission accomplished, Your Honour. Justice has been served."
Shikieiki nodded reluctantly. She missed the days of judges performing the sentences themselves, but apparently employing people like Shou raised efficiency by almost 1% so there wasn't much she could say in her defense.
"...Much appreciated, Miss Toramaru. You are dismissed. As for you, Miss Knowledge, we'll search the residence of the deceased and look for this Charisma book of yours."
Patchouli nodded quietly, still in pain from the self-inflicted fracture of her hand.
"Whuh...? Oh, it's over."
Komachi looked up at the court from her seat, slowly waking up. Given Shou's position behind the defendant's stand she was relatively sure about how the case had ended. She grinned.
"Well, it looks like Marisa Kirisame..."
She pulled out a pair of sunglasses and slipped them on.
"...just checked out."
Shikieiki leapt on top of the desk, pulling a guitar from YamaHammerSpace.
"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH~"
-
"ABSOLUTE JUSTICE, BITCH!"
This was so unexpected but so appropriate.
This has to be one of my favorite shorts written by Rou ;D
-
I lol'd a bit.
But damn, Rou. Stop killing people =D
-
<Drake> oh god rou's new story
<Drake> i literally burst out laughing
No seriously, people are asking me what's so funny.
-
I'm not sure what to take it. 'Huzzah something lighter hearted from Rou!, Huzzah victory is nearer to my grasp!, Huzzah Komachi Shades!, Huzzah Patchy!, Huzzah Eiki making an absolute mockery of the law system...? Huzzah killing Marisa...huzzah mixing the two?...huzzah patchy fr- I can't do this.'
I may not be meant to take this seriously, But it just ends up being. 'Oh, Ahahaha...? I guess its funny?'
Its... Jesus, How the hell to put it. 'What if Eiki had a bloodlust streak!' 'What if everything that keeps Eiki from being a tyrant judge disapeared!' 'What if Gensokyo of all places tried to have a law system!' 'What the fuck Eiki?'
It may just be me, But it seems like a good joke ruined by the actual fact its kind of not funny.
-
(http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/2185/huzzah.jpg)
-
(http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/2185/huzzah.jpg)
nevermind guys drake picked up my slack, s'all funny.
-
-- why have I been missing these updates.
I kinda giggled at that last one. And d'awwed at the New Years one.
-
Highway Robbery by Roukanken
There was something comforting about that little bridge in the middle of nowhere.
After a few miles of long, painful walking, fending off strong and devious youkai to boot, anyone would be glad to see an environment that wasn't cold hard rock. The bridge was rickety, old and practically unusable, but it was a break from the norm and that was all that would have mattered. A small stream ran beneath the bridge, water seeping in through some vein between the rocks. It added a serene, calming feel to the entire scene.
It didn't have the majesty you'd expect from the border between two worlds, and neither did its sole guardian.
"Seriously, no-one even uses this damn thing anymore. Why can't I get a useful job like other people?"
There was a sizable dent in the ground from where Parsee Mizuhashi had always tapped her foot. It wasn't because she was notably strong, but simply because even stone can't stand being worn at for several centuries. A pair of blonde ponytails hung behind her head, and a multi-coloured but drab dress covered her slim figure. Her arms were folded in resignation as her bright green eyes glared down one end of the tunnel which she'd guarded for as long as she could remember.
"The surface, huh...wonder if the rumours are true and they really don't have a ceiling. Must be pretty nice to not have to worry 'bout banging your head on anything."
The scorn and malice in her voice made it clear that her words were far from sincere. She spoke of things she had never seen, that her duty had stopped her from ever having a chance to see. If there was one emotion that Parsee had garnered during her time as the bridge's guardian, it was envy.
She had been cheerful when she started, warning the unprepared that they were on the verge of stepping into hell itself. They would smile, heed her warning, and pass by her a little more cautious about their surroundings. She was proud of herself, proud that she'd done her duty as a guardian.
Then people stopped coming back.
She couldn't afford to leave her post - she was busy then, and tending for new guests left her no time to worry about the fate of old ones. She always watched with concern, fearing for their fates, mentally considering all the ways the hell beneath her could have killed them.
And because no-one ever told her, she had nothing but her fears to work with. She became consumed by her worry, and eventually something inside her gave way. Whatever happened, she couldn't let people take the risk of passing into the underworld. She made her warnings stronger, more severe, but still wannabe adventurers were slipping past her and meeting whatever painful ends Parsee could think of.
Eventually she retreated into total desperation, threatening and even attacking travellers for their own sake. She hid behind a facade of jealousy, inventing excuses to attack everyone she came across. She became obsessed with poking holes in her own psyche, telling herself that she was working solely for the safety of others.
She got what she wanted - people were so scared of her that no-one wanted to risk taking the journey down to the netherworld. But there was no satisfaction in the deed for Parsee. She had convinced herself that she was worse off than everyone around her, and over time the facade became a reality.
Of course, this was all so long ago that even Parsee couldn't recall why she'd started. All she had left of those days was the scorn with which she freely mocked anyone who came to mind. She talked to herself a lot, mainly because there was no-one around to hear her. It was soothing, in a strange sort of way.
"...And apparently they all talk to each other, all friendly. Damn, it really sucks not having anyone to talk to."
There was a mild echo as Parsee spoke. It would only travel a few hundred feet, so odds were no-one would hear it-
"Aw, come on, Paruuuuuuu~ That's a mean thing ta say about me."
Or at least, so she'd thought. A coarse voice from behind Parsee informed her otherwise. She turned toward her still unseen guest, coming from the old hell outwards to the surface. She didn't need to see her to know who it was, though - it was one of the oni from the ancient city, one who had some strange intention to visit her more than anyone else. She wished she had that sort of random urge once in a while.
"You don't count, Yuugi. Are you even sober enough to engage in real conversation?"
Slowly, a young woman entered Parsee's view. Long blonde hair hung unkept around her head as she stared somewhere in the bridge guardian's general direction. One of her hands held a bowl filled with sake, and seemed to be the only part of her body that had any sense of balance. Her white shirt and blue skirt bounced around freely as she stumbled, giving Parsee an occasional chance to make out her impressive cleavage. She looked down at her own flat chest for an instant before glaring back.
"That's mean, y'know. See? I'm fine! Left foot, right foot..."
Yuugi stepped harder into the ground, leaving heavy dents where her feet touched the ground. They were thrown across the rock almost randomly thanks to her shaky stance.
"...left foot, right foot, right foo-damn."
A single misstep was more than enough to send Yuugi crashing into the ground, the red horn on her head lodging cleanly into the rock. Apparently her priorities were messed up, because the only object to survive the fall unscathed was the sake bowl, still standing upright in her now outstretched hand.
"Okay, okay. Maybe I'm a little drunk."
A muffled admission ran through the stone to Parsee's ears. She facepalmed.
"Really, I wish I could get away with being as reckless as you sometimes. No job, no duty...you just get yourself wasted every waking moment."
Yuugi heaved herself out, pulling out a few pebbles with her. She took care to avoid letting any of it land in her sake as she stuck to one side of the cavern for support.
"Not every wakin' moment, Paru. There's a little time in the mornin' where I'm kinda almost nearly sober. Sometimes."
"Look, can you quit calling me Paru? It's a stupid nickname."
Yuugi stepped closer and closer to the bridge. Parsee started to smell her breath for an instant before wisely deciding to start breathing through her mouth. She slid back slightly, her feet slipping onto the first plank behind her.
"What's wrong with it? I ain't good with names, Parzy."
"Parsee."
"See what I mean?"
She was only a few feet away now, not showing any sign of stopping. Parsee started to step backwards across the bridge as Yuugi stepped on, maintaining as much distance as she could.
"S-So. Guess you're travelling up to the surface, right? Bet you'll have tons of fun up there with all the people and the air and all that other crap that people like me never get to experience."
There was a stutter. Not out of embarrasment, but because Yuugi's approaching form was imposing to a measly guardian like her. She was strong enough to keep humans out - not to keep oni in. One good punch from Yuugi would be enough to leave Parsee picking up pieces of herself for the next decade.
"Eh, I had other ideas. Somethin' I wanted to getta hold of."
The end of the bridge. About time.
Parsee was relieved to step off the bridge and move to the side, no longer impeding the demon's path. Yuugi's last statement was still uncomforting, though.
"Something to get hold of? There's nothing here other than the path upwards. You really are drunk, aren't you..."
Yuugi's footsteps continued to shake the bridge until she reached the other side. Parsee had expected her to keep going down the tunnel, but much to her surprise Yuugi stood still.
And grinned.
"I dunno, I can see somethin' to grab onto right here."
It took a second for Parsee to realise what Yuugi was talking about.
Then her ears pricked up slightly.
"...You're kidding, ri-"
Before Parsee could even declare her surprise, Yuugi had stretched out an arm towards her, grabbing her dress with her one free hand.
"Ah!?"
She found herself unable to fight the oni's grip, and before she knew it Yuugi had her safely tucked under her free arm. The oni looked down with a smirk.
"Comfortable?"
Parsee's constant squirming and struggling suggested otherwise.
"T-The hell are you doing?! J-Just because you're stronger than me and all...! Put me down, put me down!"
Parsee's resistance quickly collapsed into childish complaints. Yuugi squeezed her lightly to quieten her.
"Geez, quit being so arguable. I'm sure your boss'll understand if you get kidnapped for a while by an oni, right?"
"K-Kidnapped?!"
That was enough to revive Parsee's futile thrashing. Yuugi bounced over the bridge, letting it rock with every step she took. Her earlier clumsiness seemed forgotten entirely.
"Well, that's the technical term. That's what I need to do to get ya to have fun, right? Do the sorta crazy stuff you always complain that you can't do. Y'know, things like drinkin' and fightin' and seein' people..."
Parsee froze for a moment.
"L-Look, I do complain about them a lot, but that doesn't mean I want to do them! I wish I was still you enough to jump to conclusions like that, dammit!"
"So you're jealous of me for no real reason?"
Silence. No sound other than Yuugi's feet stamping off the bridge and down the long road to the ancient city with a speed that could make a lesser tengu blush.
"...I...I guess not."
It was something she hadn't stopped to consider in a while. In fact, when was the last time she'd genuinely wanted something that she complained about? She thought to herself, and for a moment a fragment of the old Parsee shone through. She resigned herself to the oni's grip.
"...Fine. Kidnap me if you want. Enjoy abusing your power."
Yuugi's strong grip of Parsee at her hip metamorphosed into a one-armed hug, holding the bridge guardian against her chest like a mother.
"See, Paru? First step's admitting you have a problem~"
Parsee would have given a witty reply, but the boob her face was being slammed into posed another problem.
"C...Can't...breathe..."
Yuugi saw the slightly-green tinge of Parsee's skin turn blue before she realised that she was in the process of smothering her hostage. She eased up slightly as Parsee gasped for air.
"Hah...quit showing off. J-Just because your chest is bigger than mine..."
Parsee retreated back to envy, but now she lacked the killer edge that her words previously held. Something about Yuugi's actions had made it to her.
"B-But...why are you doing this? Taking all this time to kidnap some pointless bridge guardian?"
Yuugi looked down at Parsee. Her eyes, previously murky and hazy, now seemed to show a genuine emotion of concern.
"Well, let's just say I gotta do this. For a girl that I kinda like but don't have the nerve to tell."
Yuugi went a little redder than usual. Parsee was silent, apparently uncertain about who 'the girl' in question was.
"Hmph. Lucky girl. I wish there was someone out there who cared as much for me."
Yuugi brushed off the sentiment as the ancient city came into view. She watched Parsee's eyes widen as she experienced its glory for the first time. Any thoughts of complaining vanished from her mind completely as Yuugi murmured to herself.
"...Don't worry, Paru. There is."
-
Hee. Splendid. |3
I was planning on doing a story with a similar premise ("Yuugi approaches romance, in typical oni fashion, with brute force") for the Mizuhashi Parsee Anthology Project, except it was entirely willing on Parsee's part. Maybe I should finish it up sometime when I'm not bogged down with other projects ...
-
Bah, Parsee's just being tsundere. :V
-
That works, too! I mean ... considering she's being a non-stereotyped variety (i.e. not the kind where the author doesn't have any way of characterizing a tsundere other than going "Hmph!" and glaring and saying "It's n-not like I like you or anything!"). Though Parsee's one of the few characters who I can stand being the stereotyped variety.
-
This was uh... cute.
-
Bah, Parsee's just being tsundere. :V
I'd be interested seeing how you'd manage to make a non-Tsundere Parsee. Well, I suppose you could just make her a major heartless bitch, but yeah. :<
-
Seems like Rou is on a Rou-ll! *is shot*
Anyway, without further ado!
Wait for it... by Roukanken
The temple was quiet and empty. Just the way Shou liked it.
With no intruders to worry about, the disciple of Vaisravana had decided to take the time to practice her meditation. The journey into Hokkai had taken up a good deal of her time lately, and she'd had no chance to contemplate like she was expected to. She sat straight in her typical orange dress, her spear resting on her lap as she emptied her mind.
A quiet breeze slid through the door, rocking her blonde-streaked hair slightly. She heard, but did not listen. She was aware of every sensation she experienced, but she responded to none of them with a thought. Her mind was blank, formless, relaxed.
At least, until someone decided to poke her in the forehead.
"Hey, Shou-sama~."
"Uwah!"
Going from no sensations all the way back into reality wasn't a very fluent transition for Shou, and that single tap was enough to send her falling backwards, slamming her head into the floor. The culprit, a young-looking mouse youkai, looked over the fallen tiger curiously. One of her two dowsing rods hung where Shou's head had been, and her black ears twitched in puzzlement.
"Man, I still don't get you monk types. So jittery when you're doing your whole mehdeetayshun thing."
Shou rubbed her head as she sat back up, biting her lip.
"Maybe you should try it some time. It'd teach you a lot."
"Can't, sorry. Got work to do and all~"
Nazrin held her hands behind her head, whistling innocently and ruffling her grey hair. The crystal pendant around her neck shimmered as the light bounced off it, contrasting the bleak colour of her dark brown dress.
Shou smirked. Nazrin was technically her underling, but in truth she'd served Vaisravana far longer than she herself had. Nazrin had been a teacher of sorts to her in her early days, and even now that the master was apparently the student there was a good deal of respect between the two. And, of course, there had been the entire pagoda scandal where Nazrin had pulled Shou's ass out of the fire, so she definitely owed her a favour at the very least.
At least...that was the image they wanted to give to the outside world. It was the sort of relationship they couldn't make public for the sake of image, but the pair were closer than sisters. No-one, not even Byakuren herself, knew of their secret, and with any luck no-one ever would.
"Well...actually, there was something I wanted to do here."
Nazrin looked away, blushing a little. Her tail ran along the floor nervously. Shou tilted her head, confused.
"Hm? What, did you find something?"
Nazrin swayed around, impatient. Her hand reached into a pocket, rummaging for something. Nazrin's duty was to search for treasures on the part of Vaisravana, so Shou simply assumed she'd come across some artifact. Maybe a trinket she was offering as a gift...
"Um...h...here."
Nazrin jerked her arm out in front of Shou, holding her open palm in front of her superior. Much to the tiger's surprise, what she was holding was no relic.
It was a small, perfectly formed diamond ring.
"N...Nazrin..."
Shou stuttered as the diamond shone beautifully, her eyes unable to turn away. It was more than a present - more than a flower, more than a box of chocolates. It was a declaration, the ultimate step.
It was a proposal.
"Shou-sama...you make me happier than anyone I know. W-Will you..."
Nazrin shook where she stood, calling upon all of her courage to keep her from running out of the temple in fear. Shou's eyes started to move from the ring, to Nazrin's ruby eyes, then back to the ring.
"I...Can we get away with this?"
Nazrin nodded.
"It'll be our own little secret. No-one has to know. You can just say you found it right?"
Shou was still uncertain, torn between her duty as a disciple of Vaisravana and the emotions that were seeping freely from her heart. For a few seconds, her emotions held her in total equilibrium.
Then, finally, her heart won out, and she started on the words that would make Nazrin the happiest girl in Gensokyo.
"...Nazrin, I accept your-"
"STOP RIGHT THERE!"
The door to the inner sanctum slammed open, cutting short Shou's declaration. A furious Byakuren stomped out from within, her eyes immediately falling on the pair. Nazrin had quickly slipped the ring back into her pocket, hopefully before it had been seen.
"A-Ah, Hijiri! H-How are you today?"
Shou was sweating bullets, but she managed to slip out her words with some effort. With any luck, Byakuren would just think she was hot and move on-
"Shou! Nazrin! I trusted both of you! How could you do this?!"
No such luck.
"H-Huh? Byakuren-sama, what are you talking about?"
Nazrin tried to make a saving throw, but from the look on Byakuren's eyes her chances were pretty much non-existent anyway.
"What, you say?! Obvious I mean this relationship of yours! What sort of god would smile upon its followers engaging in carnal pleasure with one another when they're meant to be working?!"
For a moment, Nazrin and Shou looked at each other in amazement. It was true that one night the pair had decided to...enjoy each other, but Byakuren had been nowhere near the temple at the time. How had she...?
"I'll bet you're wondering how I found out, aren't you? Well, you miscreants didn't take account for these!"
Byakuren held out a single picture, barely the size of her palm. Nazrin and Shou looked at it in shock, then horror. Then fear. It very clearly showed the two of them embracing, naked, with looks of passion on their faces.
"A passing-by tengu journalist happened on your little adventure and decided to inform me about your disgraceful actions. I have to find some time to thank her."
Byakuren dropped the photo on the floor, stepping on it with one foot. Magical energy passed through her leg, giving her the strength to separate it into its respective atoms.
She cracked her knuckles.
"And as for you two...I think a little punishment is in order."
She took slow, careful steps towards the paralysed pair.
"Hi-Hi-Hijiri, maybe you should reconsider thi-uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaah~"
The two were still clinging to each other as a single punch sent them flying into the distance...
-----
"Everything went as you intended, ma'am. The pair was left too beaten and bruised to consider risking being together."
Aya bowed as she reported her success. Her employer sat across from her, a mysterious hooded figure, obviously intended to hide her identity.
"Excellent. I'm hoping this payment will suffice?"
She pulled out a leather-bound book, on which the words 'JOURNAL OF BYAKUREN HIJIRI' were carefully printed. Aya picked the tome up, skimming the content curiously.
"You'll find that I've highlighted the entries that may be of...particular interest to you."
Aya's eyes lit up as she read over her new acquisition. She gave the woman in the hood one last nod.
"Well, this'll sell papers like nobody's business! Pleasure working with you."
"And you, Miss Shameimaru. I'll keep in touch."
Aya bowed again, already imagining her next scandalous headline as she slipped out of the room. The girl in the hood sighed, realising she was alone.
"Ach, I hate talking so high and mighty like that. And Ichirin's gonna be looking for this thing pretty soon..."
She pulled the hood off her head, revealing that beneath it was a girl with short black hair and blue eyes. She reached into a nearby drawer and wore the sailor's hat she had hidden within.
"Nothing pisses me off more than seeing people get together. Especially when they leave it ambiguous enough for anyone watching to draw their own goddamn conclusions..."
She smirked to herself.
"Well, at least that's one more pairing nobody will even think of considering."
Murasa Minamitsu, Ship-Wrecker, had struck again.
-
XD
That was priceless.
-
I'm not sure who's pun was worse.
-
..........Haaaaa... haaaaahahaa haaaa
Oh, good lord. Excellent, these are. XD
Shorts are fun to read; quick, simple, and to the point. These're all very good and worth the read.
-
Holy skies.
-
ship-wrecker
...
(http://i174.photobucket.com/albums/w88/KimikoMuffin/suwa-yeah.jpg) (http://www.epiconeliner.com/)
-
Okay, I've put off respondin' to these long enough.
The New Years' one is what I would have written had tragedy decided not to rear its ugly head in my life around that time. Thanks for writing the sweet stuff that I wasn't capable of.
Strangely, one woman responded by bleeding profusely from the nose and collapsing on the floor.
I'm with this girl. Fuck yes, Shou-Shiki JUSTICE team go. Also,
(http://img109.imageshack.us/img109/7180/tomorowwwwwwww.jpg)
Also, I prefer dominant Parsee (http://safebooru.donmai.us/post/show/534346) by far, but sad and lonely and angry Parsee is good too. (Parsee never struck me as being particularly tsundere, just... sad and angry.)
Murasa Minamitsu, Ship-Wrecker, had struck again.
Ow. Also, Byakuren how can you destroy their happiness like tha-- ... I wonder how much her journal would sell for.
Keep up the good work, Rou. Writing is a wonderful self-therapy. Hope to see you in twenty days when the ban I placed on you expires. o/
-
Perfect Cherry Blossom in 60 Seconds by Roukanken (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9B3O9YyTPI0)
-
Perfect Cherry Blossom in 60 Seconds by Roukanken (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9B3O9YyTPI0)
Why is this kind of simple stuff so goddamn brilliant?
Awesome.
-
Perfect Cherry Blossom in 60 Seconds by Roukanken (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9B3O9YyTPI0)
Haha, the funniest bit that drove it all home was at the 1:00 mark - when Rou just goes '...ow.'
That was pretty awesome, too - I liked the Prismriver Sisters bit, too.
-
From the very start I knew that the "the ghosts of some jazz trio or something" line was the best part of the original text. But I'm not sure if implementing the Prismrivers' closeness to the "What is Love" meme improved it or not.
-
In the dark, dank caves of the underground, it is nothing special to see a little overhang where potentially people could hide themselves before leaping down on you. Every traveller is cautious of the first one or two, but after you realise they line the entire path your attentiveness tends to weaken.
This was a benefit for the pair, as it was in one of these overhangs that the two were holding their secret meeting. It had to be secret, otherwise it pretty much defeated the entire point.
"B-But...couldn't we have found one that was a little bigger?"
The complainer was the larger of the two, a girl in a light blue vest and skirt with oddly coloured eyes. She clung to an overgrown umbrella, the eye on it closed for fear of bumping into a stalactite.
"Stop whining. If someone passes by when we're moving between spots, we're done. Goddamn amateur."
Her companion took up a much smaller space, poking her head out of a small wooden bucket. Still, they were at such proximity that a turn of her head nearly sent a short green pigtail into the other girl's face.
"Uuu...I'm not good with closed spaces. I want to get out of here again, back into the sky, flying through the clouds before swooping down on people and-"
"Kogasa?"
"Yeah?"
"Shut up."
Kisume grouched at the karakasa as she lit a cigarette which she'd apparently pulled out from inside the bucket. Kogasa thought the idea through for a few seconds, and stopped when her brain began to hurt. At least it explained why her voice was so raspy.
And why Kogasa was coughing so much.
"Alright. Here's the plan. When some poor sap walks past, you'll be sitting down there distracting them with your retarded beauty model face so I can get the drop on 'em."
Kogasa pouted.
"Yeah, that face right there. Good to see we're on the same page for once."
"Um, b-but...I thought I was going to be the surprise? I mean, that's what I do, and-"
"Look, who's the pro here? You or me?"
For a girl of such short stature, Kisume's green eyes were pretty scary. Kogasa squeezed a little harder into the wall.
"R-Right, ma'am! S-Sorry for disagreeing with you!"
"That's better. Now that we're clear, get down there and start moaning."
As a consolation prize, Kogasa had made it out of the cramped overhang at least, swooping down onto the ground below her with her umbrella for support. She skipped over to one of the walls, taking a seat besides one of them and taking a deep breath.
Before collapsing into a flailing mess.
"Owwie! Owwie! Someone, please! I, um, tripped and broke my leg!"
She rolled around the ground with amazing dexterity for a girl with a broken bone. Kisume facepalmed, then slammed her forehead into the edge of the bucket for good measure as she murmured to herself.
"I swear, I would kick you SO HARD if I had legs."
She watched the wannabe shock-trooper for a short while, her expression slowly shifting from anger, to realisation, to a thorough satisfaction.
"Oh well. Looks like I'll have to resort to Plan B."
Kogasa was still kicking wildly, covering herself in dust and pebbles. It was like a child's tantrum, except coming from a grown teenager.
"Help me, someone! I have a really nasty booboo! It's really so-"
"KOGASA!"
A roar from the bucket-dweller brought Kogasa's distraction to a sudden halt.
"Uu? Am I doing good?"
"You look like you need to be freaking exorcised."
Getting on her knees, Kogasa stuck her tongue out and giggled a little.
"Hehe...sorry, I'm not really very good at being subtle. Going all out is more fun, right?"
She stuck her tongue out, still laughing and not really paying any attention to Kisume's inevitable lecture.
Which is probably why it took her so long to notice the fireball.
"Eh-"
The fire didn't hurt her specifically - her power as a youkai was enough to at least protect her from a surprise attack.
Not so lucky, however, were her clothes.
"Uwaaaa!?"
Kogasa immediately jumped to her feet, running in a circle mindlessly as she tried to pat at the flames quickly burning away her shirt. This time, the expression of distress on her face seemed a hell of a lot more genuine.
"Ah, what is it I'm meant to do again!? Stop, drop and...ah, what's the third one?! I'mburningI'mburningI'mburningI'mburningaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~"
Her panicking collapsed into mindless cries as her struggling only fanned the flames, sending them billowing onto her skirt. Kisume couldn't help but take some pleasure in the sight as her 'companion' fell to the floor.
"...Eh? Someone down there?"
And better yet, it killed two birds with one stone. The karakasa's call had managed to attract someone's attention - a youkai with one of the most poofy dresses physically possible, practically bulging out beneath her waist. It was one of the underground's better-known residents - Yamame Kurodani, youkai of illness.
"P-Please, help! I'm burning up!"
Realising help was at hand, Kogasa managed to produce a pair of coherent sentences. Yamame, unable to make her out from this distance, tilted her head.
"Hm? Burning up? I don't remember giving anyone around here a fever-"
It was around then she made out the slowly burning figure in the distance.
"Oh, you meant literally. My bad."
Silence.
"...Wait, what?"
Yamame's response was stunted, but as soon as she'd come to grips with the situation she was running down the cavern at full-speed. She knelt down beneath the blazing youkai, flapping her dress at the fire in an attempt to calm it down. The flames slowly died, and Kogasa breathed an audible sigh of relief. It was cool, relaxing, like a calm breeze over her chest.
"Uuu...that was scary..."
She looked down on herself to inspect the damage.
She then quickly realised that the calm breeze on her chest wasn't a simile after all.
"Uwaaa?!"
She pulled a hand over to cover her bare chest, her shirt practically burnt away by the fire. Her skirt had been luckier, only losing a few inches in length.
Yamame got to her feet, crossing her arms in order to enter her lecture pose.
"You must have run into one of the tsurube-otoshi. They're local youkai, ones that like to drop on you and fling fire your way. You can't be too careful when you-"
That was as far as the good samaritan got before the bottom of a wooden bucket slammed into her skull.
"Direct hit."
Yamame crumpled to the floor instantly, out cold. Kisume bounced off, taking care to keep the bucket upright as she came to a landing. She looked at her fallen prey, smiling wryly.
"That's for scaring people away, jerkass. No-one spoils my fun and gets away with it."
Kogasa sat stunned for a moment, unable to comprehend exactly what had just happened. Kisume turned to her with a wink.
"Well, whaddaya know? Guess you were useful for something after all. Thanks and all that crap."
Kogasa's eyes started to water, as she raised her free hand to point at the bucket-dweller.
"You...you meanie! That was really, really, really...mean!"
The stress had apparently burnt away her vocabulary along with most of her clothing. Kisume raised her hands in faux horror.
"Oh no, some loser karakasa thinks I'm mean! My heart, I think it's snapping in two."
By now Kogasa had made it to her feet and started stamping out of the cave in a huff. Her umbrella had survived the blaze, and turned around to stick its tongue out at Kisume as its owner departed, still moaning in embarrassment.
"Uuu...uuu..."
Kisume sneered as her supposed partner walked into the distance.
"Sure, leave it to the freaking little girl to move the body around. Real polite of ya."
She decided the best cure for her irritation was another shot of nicotine. She reached into the bucket, pulling out another cigarette and taking a long, satisfying puff.
"...This is why I hating working with amateurs."
-
best kisume
-
What is this I don't even
Killer bucketloli.
I'm picturing her with shades, a cross scar on her cheek, and a stupid ridiculous hairdo - possibly a ragged buzzcut - while smoking her cigarettes.
-
My head a splode. :o
-
Oh holy what.
-
I especially love that Parsee story so far, it is just so.... Aki Eda.
-
"...Well. It seems Yukari has an...interesting taste in guests to send me."
Remilia struggled to find the words she was looking for, which was a very rare occurance for her. She sipped at her tea incessantly, using the act as an excuse to talk less.
"...I'll say, when she told me she was bringing me one of my own, I wasn't expecting you to be...this."
Across the table sat a young man whose pale skin was apparently attractive outside of Gensokyo. Every aspect of his facial features was flawless - a perfectly modelled jaw, nose, lips, everything. A pair of dark, cold eyes stared across the table at his host, analysing her coldly and completely. In many ways he reminded Remilia of the toy dolls she had given Flandre to play with, the ones she'd never been able to keep in one piece for longer than an hour.
There was about as much depth to him, as well.
"I've never been one to commit to social norms. It keeps people away from me."
Edward Cullen wore his one facial expression, that of disinterest and boredom. His eyes wandered around the room, occasionally looking with suspicion at the closed curtain hanging across the wall. For a moment Remilia let herself consider that beyond the border this man was adored by teenage girls everywhere.
She felt ill.
"Okay, let me run this by me again. You can read my mind-"
"Correct, and right now you seem to be thinking up various ways to kill me. I can assume you aren't very fond of me."
Apparently, thought Remilia, when God decided to make Edward Cullen he misplaced his list of shortcomings. Or maybe it was a she in this case.
"...Right. Anyway, on top of that, you're super strong, super fast and super durable. You're incredibly attractive to each and every one of your peers, and you don't need to breathe, eat or sleep."
Edward nodded.
"Pretty much."
Remilia raised an eyebrow in confusion.
"And despite all of this, you think you're a monster?"
Edward attempted to glare at his host, but given that it was his default emotion it had little effect.
"You don't understand how hard it is. Keeping people away from me, not hurting them-"
"Ah, yes, I forgot. You're a vampire who avoids drinking blood. Which is about as sensible as an artist who never paints, but who am I to judge? I've only been alive for, what, 400 years longer than you?"
There was a sense of victory as Remilia took another sip of tea. He had instinctively refused it, which irritated her somewhat but was hardly the last thing she could do to this man.
"...I'm not like you. I have morals."
"Is that what you told your little Isabella?"
Edward showed emotion in the only way he knew how - by standing up aggressively. Remilia winced a little as she noticed that he was a good two heads taller than her.
"Bella was...an accident. A mistake. But...I love her!"
"That's why you broke up with her and let her nearly kill herself, I assume. Love must work very strangely outside of the border."
There was something thoroughly satisfying about taking this man apart. Everything about him felt bland, one-dimensional, and showing him up for what he was turned out to be incredibly pleasing.
Plus, from what she had heard this man was giving vampires a bad name outside of Gensokyo. Beating him down was practically a duty, in that case.
"I was scared for her sake! Our love is genuine!"
Was that actual emotion rising in Edward's voice? Probably a fluke, Remilia told herself.
"Yes, genuine love consists of telling her who she can be friends with, listening in on her, and watching her intently while she sleeps. Very, very interesting definition-"
And sure enough, here he was jumping over the table with an expression that was probably supposed to be rage but came across as a mild irritation. Nothing was more entertaining to Remilia than an opponent whose soft spots were blatantly obvious.
Had any sort of logic been present, Edward would have made the jump with ease, landed on Remilia, and most likely proceeded to beat her to a pulp. However, this was Gensokyo, and in Gensokyo logic is largely ignored in favour of whatever overpowered youkai happens to be present.
His leap ended in a headfirst collision with Remilia's chair, which (much to the mistress's annoyance) came apart after the impact. Remilia was standing utterly relaxed at the other end of the room, as if she'd been there the whole time. Edward raised an eyebrow, his form of displaying utter shock.
"Oh, don't be so surprised. You clearly haven't spent long in Gensokyo, have you?"
At Remilia's side, almost instantly, another young woman emerged from nowhere. She was dressed in a traditional French maid outfit, but the cold glare and sharp looking knives in her hand were enough to tell Edward she wasn't here to clean away the cutlery.
"Ojou-sama, what would you have me do to our guest?"
Sakuya turned to her mistress, keeping a knife pointed in Edward's direction at all times. Remilia wore a devilish smirk.
"Hm...I'd say he needs a little sunlight, with that complexion of his."
Sakuya nodded. She looked for a moment at Edward, still standing surprised(?) at the table, realising slowly what Remilia's plan was.
By the time she had clicked her fingers, it was too late.
Time froze, and from Edward's point of view there was no movement at all. He didn't see Sakuya run across the room, pulling the curtain open so as to illuminate the whole table area.
But as she clicked her fingers again, he realised that was exactly what had happened.
"We~ll, Mr. Cullen? I wonder if you're still so attractive when your skin is burning away~?"
Total elation ran across Remilia's face as she watched for Edward to collapse into a pile of ashes or some other painful end. This happiness quickly faded when she realised that no such fate was befalling him.
"...Huh?"
Edward's expression had by now returned to boredom, as the sun continued to shine down upon him. His skin shone, in every definition of the word - almost as if he was the screwed up child of a vampire and a diamond.
"...Ojou-sama, he appears to be-"
"I know, Sakuya. Stop treating me like a 495-year-old."
Remilia pouted, crossing her arms in a childish huff. Her triumphant execution of this jerk had failed miserably. She sighed.
"...Just give him to Flandre or something."
Sakuya nodded, ready to click her fingers again. From reading her mind, Edward got a pretty good idea that he didn't want to meet this Flandre.
"Wait, don't-"
That was as far as Edward got before time stopped once again. By the time she was done, Remilia was alone in the room with the curtain closed again.
"...Sparkling vampires? Is that what we've been reduced to outside Gensokyo?"
There was a fresh cup of tea sitting at the table for her. She took Edward's seat, given that he wouldn't be needing it any time soon, and took a good long sip. In the distance, she could make out her sister's excited cries.
"Ooh, are you onee-chan's new present for me?! You look like you're going to be a lot of fuun~!"
Edward's cries were quickly replaced with the sounds of pain, violence and general discomfort. Remilia allowed herself a small grin as it reached her ears.
"I should visit Patchouli to get my mind off of this. Yukari mentioned an author she thought I'd be interested in...Meyer, or something like that..."
-----
Sequel where Remilia meets Ebony from My Immortal. Y/N?
-
Y
I'm tempted to show this to a few friends elsewhere (although I'd want your permission first!). Very nice work, and good satire... I've always wanted a story along these lines~
-
I'm tempted to show this to a few friends elsewhere (although I'd want your permission first!).
Why not? It's not like I'm making money from this or anything. :V
-
Rou, you are a genius~
You just made the world a much better place :V
Whenever this damned book/movie is going to come up again, I'll just call your story to my mind and endure everything with a satisfied smile. ;D
-
It's quite bizarre how bad things get popular fast and good things are forgotten to a corner of the world.
Or actually is better this way.
-
Or actually is better this way.
Not with the President we both have to endure.
By the way Rou, the story is simply amazing, and that makes me unsure if I hate you and want to kill you or if you're just brilliant.
-
I would like to know every little detail of what happens during Edward's visit with Flandre. You know, Meyer-heavy description and all that.
-
Awesome. X3
-
The foot of the Mountain of Youkai, as a brand new day welcomed Gensokyo. The plants rose in stature as the sun shone upon them, and a colourful selection of wildlife awoke. Luscious greenlands, with crystal-clear waters running alongside them, created an atmosphere that the outside world couldn't hope to match in its most idyllic imaginations.
An atmosphere that was shattered irrevocably as one loud, rough syllable cut through the air.
"Arrrrrrr."
With a ferocity akin to a tiger's growl, Murasa Minamitsu proudly swaggered along the lakeside. The native creatures, already frightened away by her cry alone, weren't around to discover that she looked nowhere near as threatening as she sounded - though it obviously took a good deal of strength to heave around a full-grown anchor on her back with such ease.
"Aye, they be lyin' tae me when they said there be no oceans in Gensokyo. Lookit all this water!"
Murasa pointed at the rather weedy-looking river that she walked alongside, talking to no-one in particular. A small trail of sand run along its side, just about wide enough for a person to stand on.
"Arr...and where there be sand, there be treasure!"
She pulled out her trustworthy metal detector, holding it firmly against the ground. Its head was pressed hard into the sand as Murasa walked down the riverside, scouring for treasure.
"Beep. Beep."
The metal detector started to give off a dull beeping sound as it was pulled along. Murasa's face lit up.
"Gettin' closer..."
She started to walk a little faster. With every step, the detector's beeping grew in intensity and speed. Murasa's heart raced along with it in anticipation, rising to speeds that would probably kill a human being.
"Beep beep beep beep beep..."
As she walked onward, Murasa could make out an oddly coloured shape of sand in the distance. Only a slightly darker yellow to its neighbours, but with her years of experience Murasa caught it with ease. For the sake of completion she slammed the detector into the mound with a satisfying slam.
"Beeeeeeeeep..."
It gave off one last, almost sorrowful fanfare before Murasa threw it to the side. Now came the fun part. Her hand now reached for the anchor on her back, and with an elegant motion she swooped down with the overgrown hunk and metal and scooped away a good chunk of sand.
"And ta think there're wannabe pirates who waste their time wi' spades fer diggin!"
With her amazing speed, it only took Murasa a matter of seconds to reach something buried beneath the sand. Her spare hand immediately reached down, and without even looking she grabbed her prize and held it in the air triumphantly.
"ARRRR! Another bounty be mine!"
She squeezed at her trophy, judging it based on feel alone. It was cold and hard, just large enough to fit in her hand. Her finger pressed on a sharp edge, and her eyes widened.
"B-By Chiyuri's Folding Chair! One a' the legend'ry 1-Up Stars?!"
She pulled it in front of her face, desperation and shock overriding her glee. If this thing was purple, she was made for life.
She was disappointed to find that it was green instead.
"Arr? What'sis?"
She spun it in her hand, maintaining a faint hope that she was just looking at it from the wrong angle. Unfortunately, it was green no matter which was she looked at it.
"Never seen one'a these before...some relic o' times before mine, methinks."
Unimpressed, Murasa tossed the star into the river, watching it as the current pulled it under. Her fist shook slightly.
"A'ight, just gettin' ridda the junk before I get ta the good stuff. Take 2!"
She grabbed the detector again, pushing it back into the sand. Its beeping was a good deal quieter now, and didn't increase much in frequency as its owner walked along the riverside. Murasa frowned.
"Hmm...maybe if I dip it in..."
Murasa slipped the detector into the water slightly, running it across submerged sand.
"Bleeplb...bleeplb..."
There was a slight but noticable increase. Murasa smirked.
"Aye, we be gettin' somewhere now!"
She pushed the metal detector further into the water, letting it sink in deeper and deeper. She grinned as its resonance grew louder and louder, until the point where even the detector itself was shaking.
"Bleeplbleeplbleepl!"
The detector's sound came off as almost desperate, as it reacted with nearly enough force to lift itself out of the water. Murasa held it in place regardless, excitement overwhelming her-
"Murasa, what the hell?"
Her trance was interrupted by a booming voice from behind her. Twisting her head, Murasa found herself face-to-face with the last person she'd been wanting to meet.
"A-Arr...mornin', Adm'ral Shou. Y'aren't usually up and about this early, are ye-"
Shou glared her down, using her few extra inches to great effect. The intense anger in her eyes said more than any words could contain.
"Ah, well...see, I know I didn't ask before I borrowed from ye...but they always be sayin' that it's easier ta get forgiven than get permission-"
"Gleeelplbl..."
The detector's call cut Murasa off, as the pair of them looked into the water. A few bubbles rose to the surface in time with the beep.
"Just get her out of there."
Shou's command was simple and direct. As the detector continued to squirm in Murasa's hand, the sailor sighed and finally lifted it out of the water.
Nazrin gasped for air the instant her head broke the surface, shivering a little as cold water hung on her face. She still struggled against the ropes that Murasa had jumped her with, holding her arms at her sides.
"Haah...haah...b-beep beep..."
Shou grabbed her underling from Murasa's hands in an instant, holding her tenderly as she untied her. There were tears in Nazrin's eyes from getting slammed into the 'treasure' head-first, though she did her best to act as though it was just salt water.
"Ah...Shou-sama, there's sand in my ears..."
The tiger youkai hugged Nazrin with a maternal touch, undoing the last of her bonds. The mouse youkai started to run her fingers around her ears in irritation as her superior got to her feet. Her benevolence vanished in an instant as she turned to Murasa.
"You don't expect me to let you away with this, do you?"
Shou reached for her own weapon, carefully wielding a spear as long as she was tall. She held its tip a few inches from Murasa's face. The sailor shrugged.
"Aye, whatever. The Capn's gotta go down with the ship 'n' all."
There was a confident grin on Murasa's face as she admitted her defeat. For an instant Shou hesitated - was Murasa really the kind to give up that easily? Regardless, there was really nothing she could do in this position, so there was nothing wrong with just lunging forward and-
"Sinker Ghost."
-falling flat on your face and half-burying yourself in damp sand as your weapon shifts straight through your target.
"Ahahaha! Ye didn't think I'd play fair, did ye?! Bloody landlubbers, couldna think yer way outta a knot!"
A green tint had run across Murasa's body, as she took on her original ghostly form. Seeing an opportunity, she ran in the opposite direction as fast as she could. Shou pulled her head out of the sand as fast as she could, but her target still had an unmatchable head start. There was nothing she could do but mutter a curse as her foe fled into the distance.
"Goddammit. I hate that card."
-----
Zzzz...
Further down the river, the water expanded slightly into a small lake. A single dolphin swam in lazy circles within it, enjoying her half-sleep and paying more or less no attention to her surroundings.
A sharp, painful object jabbing her in the side jolted her back into consciousness.
"?!"
Turning on the spot, the dolphin noticed a small green star passing by her. Its five jagged ends were enough to incriminate it as the culprit, and she made to grab it for a closer look. Realising that her hand-fins weren't cut out for the job, she reverted to humanoid form and grabbed it with a real hand instead.
"...?"
Why do I suddenly feel so...faithful?
-----
[/throwawaycameo]
-
Ack. I haven't kept up with enough of the games themselves to know all the goodies and pick-ups and items. Are the green stars from MoF?
-
I saw the Nazrin twist coming so far away I don't even know
Still great, though. Oh wow.
-
"B-By Chiyuri's Folding Chair!"
This oath made me laugh more than it had a right to.
-
That's because you're you. |3
-
Rou, allow me to tell you now that I finally read through the Reimu and Yukari's depressing 3part you wrote:
I CRIED LIKE A BITCH
SERIOUSLY
WHY DID I READ THIS BEFORE I SLEEP?
I CRIED LIKE A BITCH, God, I can't stop sobbing...
this is... arggghhh. (reminds me of Key Games, damn you)
-
A-F is lame :V
-
I am sorry I am lame, being emotional is part of the dramatic changes of being an artist lol.
/oops sorry if I hit a sore spot.
kekeke.
-
I cried two parts sissy tears and one part manly tears when I read the depressing bits.
Then I remembered that not all stories need to have happy endings to be powerful stories, and sometimes the satisfying finish from a powerful story can be twisted ever so slightly by your perception of the story to MAKE it into a happy ending.
Sure, Reimu passed away - but she went in peace and told Yukari that she'd be able to get over it.
And who knows - she probably ended up at Higan, BS'd a while with Komachi, went across the river, and Eiki was like 'yo celestial for you, gtfo of my courtroom before I ABSOLUTE JUSTICE you'
-
That was a good RE joke Rou. Nice one. I'm amazed you people don't get the references.
Also, the Remilia meets Edward Cullen was the best yet. All of these are just...just great.
-
People.
If there was anything Alice Margatroid couldn't stand, it was people.
Of course, people knew that. They had always written off Alice as a loner with a doll-building obsession who was too stubborn and proud to admit she had feelings for anyone.
What she hated was that they were half right on that count.
"Seriously, I don't understand what is with these people."
Alice muttered to herself, aware that only the wooden ears of her dolls would catch her voice. She sewed up a tear Shanghai had received after one of her more recent automaton experiments went awry. She had cut off her supply of magical energy (if Alice's concentration slipped for an instant she'd fidget, and that'd make everything harder) so Shanghai simply looked back at her with blank eyes.
"So caught up in their romanticism and all. Just because I like being by myself means I'm shy?"
As she worked, one of her unused pinkies wagged incessantly. A barely visible thread connected it to another doll, currently writing down Alice's monologue as she spoke. There was no real finesse in her finger movement, but her mind thought out the task plain and clear. The magic did the rest.
"Especially all the people who think I have a thing for Marisa. I mean, really? Just because we live close and we have similar interests we're immediately a pair?"
Even when she talked to herself, Alice managed to keep herself perfectly calm. One of the other rumours passing around about her was that she was thoroughly depressed and lonely, crafting dolls as an attempt to keep herself company.
If she ever found out who'd started that one, she'd show them exactly what her dolls were capable of. And it wasn't tea parties and puppet shows.
The needle finished its final journey, and pulling at it Alice smiled as Shanghai's dress slipped back together. She raised a finger towards the doll, and another thread started to pass through the air towards the contraption. As it made contact the doll's head rose, and emotion began to seep into her eyes. She stood up with her tiny little legs and bowed.
"Many thanks, master."
"Whatever. Just get ready to move, I want to talk to some people."
Shanghai had been the closest Alice had come to her goal of creating a doll that could move on its own. An automaton - It was the absolute pinnacle of her field, the result she'd been aiming for for years now, but even Shanghai was unable to act unless Alice maintained her with her own supply of magic. Her mind drifted to a rumour of a living doll in the suzuran fields, but that had only been at large during the flower-viewing incident some time ago. She'd visited several times afterwards with no success, so most days she simply sat around and tweaked Shanghai until she reached her dream.
That was all it was. Nothing more. No loneliness, no embarrassment, no nothing.
"And I'm sick of people trying to insist that's the case."
Taking a bag of spare dolls with her just in case, Alice let herself out and began to make her way out of the Forest of Magic, Shanghai following right behind her shoulder. She had already decided where to start - honestly, in terms of information in Gensokyo, there was only one place that made sense.
---
"Hey, if it isn't the hikki puppeteer herself!"
Aya's opening remark was, if nothing else, thoroughly predictable. She motioned to a seat across from her desk at the Bunbunmaru office (read: a shed on the Mountain of Youkai that someone had forgotten to demolish), and Alice accepted. A tiny plaque on the desk read 'Aya Shameimaru: Reporter, Editor, And Professional Photographer (Given Sufficient Funding)'.
"You must've brought me something pretty juicy if you managed to get past Momizi. I've told her not to let anyone past unless they've got something good to offer."
"Yeah, about that. I sorta lent her one of my dolls to toy around with while I talked to you. I'd suggest you find a guard with a longer attention span sometime soon."
"...Oh."
Aya's disappointment was apparent. Shanghai shook her head in disapproval, displaying Alice's inner thoughts without needing to say a word. She patched up her expression, though, and did her best to rebound.
"A-Anyway. Should I assume you're here to spill the truth about your feelings?"
"As a matter of fact, I am."
Aya's face beamed, though she seemed disappointed in the lack of nerves on Alice's part. She grabbed a piece of paper from the pile beneath her desk, pulling out a pen.
"Good to see you're coming clean, Alice! Don't need much from you, just a quote about your undying love for that black-white. The rumour mill's already given me plenty to work with."
"Actually, on that note. Any idea as to where this rumour mill started?"
Aya jerked her head away from the piece of paper, clearly irritated her scoop wasn't coming for free.
"Well, since you're not going to anyone else about it, I guess it's only fair I give you a little back."
She stopped for a minute, looking blankly into the distance. Alice could almost hear the cogs whirling in her head as she pulled her mind back to the start of this mess.
"...It's been around for a while, so I can't give anyone in particular...I remember that apparently the source is someone very close to you, but really that's all that got specified. It was in enough detail for me to believe it, too. Not enough for an article, though apparently that's about to change~."
Alice's eyes widened for a moment. Who out there would honestly call themselves close to her? She'd taken people in, but she'd never really paid any attention to them during their stay, and no-one ever visited her-
"...Ah."
Shanghai, as a servant of her master's intentions, slammed the palm of her hand into her face alongside Alice. The puppeteer groaned slightly.
"...Goddammit. Here I was thinking it was just people being over-romantic and making it up on a whim."
Alice pulled her hand aside, shaking her head and readjusting her hair. Shanghai fiddled with her dress in unison as the seven-coloured youkai got to her feet.
"Well, Miss Shameimaru, it's been interesting. Thanks for your help."
Alice moved towards the door, prompting a cry of shock from Aya.
"H-Hey, wait! What about this article?!"
Alice looked back with a demonic smirk.
"Oh, don't worry. I've never cared at all for Marisa in the slightest. Just thought you might want to know that."
She walked out the 'office' with a confident stride, looking out to the path down the mountain. Momizi was where Alice had left her, lying on the ground at her guard post toying with the doll. Her tail was wagging with childish satisfaction.
"Ehehe, it's cute...oh, Miss Margatroid. Do I have to give this back now...?"
Momizi pouted, her wolf ears drooping slightly. Alice turned to her, then back to the building she'd emerged from. Aya wasn't going to let her away with this for nothing, and if she didn't have any news to offer the tengu would probably settle for just handing down a beating. And even if she found Marisa, there was no way she could do anything about it alone.
With unsympathetic haste, a plan formed in Alice's head.
"Actually, you can hold onto it for doing such a good job, okay? Now go and show it to your boss, she'll love it."
Momizi's eyes glistened with joy. She nodded happily as Alice quickly started to make her way down the mountain. A few seconds later, Aya emerged, fan in hand as she dashed towards the puppeteer.
"That does it, you goddamn NEET! Nobody leaves me without spilling something news-worthy-"
"Hey, Miss Aya~! Look at this!"
Aya froze at Momizi's call, rubbing her temples. She always picked the worst times to do things like this. Not that it mattered - Aya was the fastest in Gensokyo, so there was no way Alice could run from her.
"...Okay, lemme see this thing."
Aya sat down next to Momizi, observing the doll. It was definitely well made, presumably one of Alice's standard models. It was nice seeing her fellow tengu enjoy herself so much with it, at least...
In the distance, Alice clicked her fingers.
"Eh? Miss Aya, do you hear a ticking sound coming from this doll? I don't know if it's supposed to be doing tha-"
---
Meanwhile, at the Hakurei shrine, Reimu found herself wondering why she couldn't get time to herself in her own damn home. Either it was Suika or it was the girl lying across her lap right now, her overgrown witch's hat lying a few inches from her head.
"You're an idiot, you know that?"
Marisa laughed in response. Reimu honestly wished that the girl had the capability to at least accept an insult - it defeated the point entirely if she just defused everything with laughter.
"Gee, y'think? Personally I think it's kinda funny."
"You went for easy targets. No ambition."
Reimu sipped at a cup of green tea, having grown used to Marisa's tendency to treat her friends like they were siblings. Although maybe 'friend' was the wrong word from Reimu's point of view. 'Stubborn acquaintance who mistakes coincidental meetings for signs of friendship' made more sense, but it was sort of a mouthful.
"Well, you gotta make it believable and all. Alice is sorta a jerk, but all you need to do is slant your view a little and BAM! She's as deredere as you get. Same with Patchy and Nitori - just give the tengu a rumour or two and the system runs itself!"
"...Deredere?"
"Some word your gap friend told me about. Never mind."
Marisa was looking up at the afternoon sky with an expression of contentment. Her arms were behind her head, and she smiled to herself as if in response to some hidden joke.
"Anyway, things are going pretty swell for me. Nothing to worry abou-"
"Here as usual, I see."
Marisa jerked to her feet with inhuman speed as her voice was cut off. A familiar face had walked in on the conversation. Familiar in a very uncomfortable way.
"U-Uh, hey, Alice. D-Didn't think you ever bothered visitin' Reimu, so, uh..."
Alice worn an expression that had transcended rage and gone all the way around back to calm. Shanghai, still fluttering over her shoulder, was somewhat less relaxed, turning to Marisa and running her finger across her throat.
"I suppose you thought it'd be pretty funny to try passing me off as some lonely love-sick loser, didn't you? Something that you thought would make a nice little joke, huh?"
Alice casually stepped forward, the smile on her face terrifyingly false. Marisa started adjusting her collar as she tried to shimmy to the side.
"Uh, well, y'see...this is all a crazy misunderstanding, right? Just some stupid jokes that got outta hand and, well, it wasn't my idea, and-"
That was as far as she got before she could see her opening. She burst into running speed instantly, trying to use her added momentum to burst past Alice and off to freedom-
"Hold it!"
Marisa stopped dead in her tracks as something grabbed her by the shoulder. Her head turned to the assailant, and it was only with mild surprise that she failed to see anyone holding her in place. The edge of her dress almost seemed trapped in midair. The voice that had called out was the second of the three Marisa really hadn't wanted to hear.
"What, you thought I'd confront you by myself? You really are an idiot, Marisa."
Alice let a tone of triumph slip into her voice. The invisible figure started to fade into view, and Marisa found herself face to face with her (now quite definitely ex-)kappa partner.
"I let you visit and promise to show you my new inventions...and this is what I get!? That's just plain mean, Marisa!"
Nitori was nowhere near as calm as Alice had been, tears rolling down her eyes. Marisa's mouth bobbed open and shut as she tried to produce some sort of excuse.
"Uh, w-well...y-you're not getting it...really-"
Before she could offer any more in her defense, a swarm of ropes emerged from the staircase in the distance, advancing on the captive witch and wrapping themselves around her. Nitori dropped her, allowing the now-bound Marisa to fall to the floor.
"...Haah...haah...I have yet...to understand...just why these humans...are so obsessed with...stairs."
Patchouli, the last of the trio, hauled herself up the stairway to the shrine with all the energy her body could spare. The ropes of wind were her doing, and as a superior magician they were more than enough to keep Marisa at bay.
Marisa was looking up at the sky again, but this time with no feelings of happiness whatsoever. Three faces loomed over her - two melancholic, one distraught, and all of them almost definitely coming up with ideas of bad things to do to her.
"Well, Marisa, I'm sure you're be aware of the threefold law?"
Alice smiled, motioning to Nitori to continue.
"Right. Whatever you give out to the world..."
"...You shall receive in return, threefold."
With that as a promise of what was in store, the trio put their united effort into lifting the flailing witch.
"H-Hey, guys! This isn't funny, really! Y-You can put me down now and all...aw, man, it was a joke! Don't get hard about i-gah!"
It was a strange occurance in that whenever Marisa's complaints became too loud, Alice would accidentally drop her head and send it slamming into a stair. What an amazing coincidence, especially since it lasted the whole several minute trip down the stairs, and there was yet more punishment to come after that.
Not that Reimu cared, though. She was back to sipping her tea, observing the entire affair as a spectator alone.
"...Heh. Looks like it all worked out in the end."
By offering the idea to Marisa all that time ago, she'd intended for everything to come to a head like this. Marisa passed out rumours, girls get pissed, girls beat up Marisa, Marisa ends up too distraught to bother her again. All for the sake of finally getting her own shrine to herself.
There was a new flavour in her tea today - that wonderful aftertaste of everything going just as planned.
-
....
REIKAKU DOORI. (http://www.epiconeliner.com/)
-
Reimu is quite a bitch isn't it... lol
even relationship wise.
I like it~
-
Reimu.
Amazing.
<33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333~~~~~~~~~
-
Reimu that was Evil, Very Evil.
-
Unexpected update!
As some of you may know, the 16th is Ruro's birthday, so I decided that I'd give her a gift in the only way I knew how; a story. She insisted I put it up here rather than keep it private, so...here you go!
---
Eiki Shiki, the Yama of Xanadu, had never been one to find repetition boring.
The seat at her office had a near-permanent imprint of her hind quarters by now. She had sifted through more paperwork in the last hour than most of her fellow judges would take on in a working day. Not that any of them were lazy, per se - they simply took time off the job to relax, catch a breath, talk to their subordinates. Others liked to stop for a snack, even though technically food was something the Yama no longer needed to sustain themselves.
Eiki partook in none of these.
"Justice is entirely selfless as an occupation. Time I spend indulging my own desires is time that I leave the fates of the dead unresolved."
She muttered to herself to stay resolute as she filled out a form nigh-identical to the one she'd just placed to her side. There was a celestial bureaucracy at work, and as a result it was left to her to sort out the inevitable paper trail. It was a thankless task, and left her with less time to get around to the actual judgement than most, but she resolved this problem by simply cutting out hours from her sleep pattern. Self-sacrifice was the only sign of an honest judge, in her opinion.
So in many ways, this day was a repeat of the one before. Filling out a nigh-endless pile of forms, making requests, writing paychecks, everything that should have been done by someone in another department. Eiki acted with no malice, only a desire to make Higan work at maximum capacity.
The pile of forms stood between Eiki and her eastern-most wall, blocking her view of the calendar. As she slowly drove through her workload, it began to slip into view - a simple 12-month calendar, marking today as the sixteenth day on the month of Kisaragi.
The hastily scribbled 'BIRTHDAY' in the corner of the date caused her to blink once as she glanced at it. She glared at it for a few seconds before sighing.
"...It's hardly a day worth celebrating. I passed on some time ago, after all..."
Paying it no further heed, Eiki disregarded the calendar and turned back to the painfully familiar regulation form. Once again she requested an audience with the highest of the yama to propse a revolutionary plan for those who had no rightful place in hell or Hakugyokurou on death. A place inbetween for those who were neither sinners nor saints. Most likely she'd be told that her absolute power of black and white made such a resource unnecessary, but it wouldn't go down for lack of trying.
The fine oaken door to her office shook slightly as it was knocked.
"Hey, boss. Package for ya."
Komachi's rough voice almost seemed to burrow through the door, echoing into the room on the other side. Eiki allowed herself to look up for the briefest of instances.
"Alright, bring it in."
The door creaked open at her command, her shinigami subordinate letting herself in. She held a package in both arms, covered in an ornate red wrapping with green ribbons running across it. Her scythe was balanced precariously on top of it, ready to tip and impale someone any moment. Komachi was sniffing for some reason as she carried it to her boss's desk.
"Dunno why this is here. Doesn't really feel like anything the judges would send you. And it smells kinda weird."
She seemed relieved as she dropped it on Eiki's desk, grabbing at her nose and stepping back.
"Geez. I dunno if you've got some kinda stalker or somethin'. I'm gonna just go polish my scythe, so don't expect me around for a little while."
With that, Komachi stepped out again, apparently unaware that her scythe was still on top of the package. Eiki allowed herself a smile - Komachi was normally a master procrastinator, but sometimes her excuses just didn't add up. She decided that given her own overblown work hours it was only fair that her subordinate could get a break from watching over her.
"...Still. What is this?"
Eiki placed the scythe on the desk properly as she picked up the package. Weighing it in her hands she found it to be relatively light, its contents most likely some sort of fabric. The scent of the wrapping rose up and reached her nose. Its familiarity caused her to flinch for an instant.
It was the smell of strawberries.
"...Tch. This is just like her, isn't it...?"
She shouldn't have been wasting time on this. There was work to be done, just like there always was. Engaging in something useless like this was a waste of time.
And yet, somehow, she didn't care. She hadn't received a birthday present in centuries, so the act of tearing apart the wrapping like an over-excited child carried a wonderful touch of nostalgia. She was glad that Komachi wasn't able to see her doing this - she still had to maintain some sense of dignity, after all.
As the last layer of wrapping came apart, Eiki's eyes widened.
"...Oh...oh, my."
Within was a piece of clothing made of a simple, elastic fabric. It was the same dark shade of blue as her official uniform, but clearly it wasn't meant for any sort of similar use. There was a name tag on the front, on which the word 'EIKI' had been written in huge infantile letters with a red marker. There was a note attached at the bottom with much more adult and fluent handwriting, written on light pink paper:
'Thought something like this would help you if you should ever fall into the Sanzu River. Happy Birthday. ~Yumemi'
By now Eiki's mouth was bobbing open and closed like a fish's. Taking it out of its wrapping completely, she opened it up fully. She was suddenly reminded of the swimming classes she'd taken back during her years among the living - she had worn something almost identical to this, though obviously a lot smaller given her age.
Of all the things she could get for her birthday, Yumemi had given her this. Not something practical, like a fountain pen or even a box of her favourite handpicked strawberries.
She'd given her a school swimsuit.
"Ah...wha...!?"
R-Ridiculous! I can't be seen wearing this, it'd be the death of me! It goes against every rule and regulation Higan has ever had, doesn't it?! And an outfit so...so revealing is unbefitting of a yama! What was she thinking?!
Eiki's face had turned bright crimson in a matter of seconds, unable to get her eyes away from the piece of swimwear in her hands. She almost wanted to get Komachi to throw it away, but then there'd be the question of how it came to her in the first place, and that'd involve explaining the connections she had outside of Gensokyo...
Wait! That'll work!
Realising disposing of the offending garment wasn't an option, Eiki hastily constructed a Plan B. Placing it to the side momentarily, she started to unfasten the buttons on her dress. If there was nowhere she could hide it in the room, she had no choice but to hide it on her person.
Within a minute Eiki had managed to undress herself down to her undergarments. Now she reached for the swimsuit and slipped it on, blushing all the while. At least Yumemi had managed to get her sizes right - it was a neat fit, its elastic clinging to her body with ease.
"Okay, now I need to get changed again before anyone sees this-"
"Yo, Eiki!"
Another knock on the door, but this time Eiki had every reason to be shocked by it. She jumped onto the seat behind her desk, pulling on one of her socks.
"K-Komachi! I'm busy!"
Despite her protests, the door slid open anyway. Eiki's blood ran cold.
"S'okay, just realised I left my scythe in here. Nothin' to worry abou-"
That was as far as Komachi got before her eyes fell on her superior. In her desperation she had laid her long, slender legs on the desk as she'd been pulling her socks on, and the only other garment of her original uniform she was wearing was the hat she'd slipped on moments before. Komachi's attention was obviously focused on the nonsensical piece of fabric running across Eiki's whole body, making her seem as if she was ready to take an afternoon dip in the Sanzu.
There was an awkward, painful silence. Eiki's face turned bright crimson.
"K-Komachi...this isn't what it looks like..."
Komachi's expression was initially shock, but it slowly metamorphosed into her own form of embarrassment. The red tint from her blushing interlaced with the blood slowly dripping out of her nose.
"...Uh...I, um...think I'll just keep the scythe in here for now. I need to, uh...run to the bathroom. Right now."
Clutching her nose to stop the bleeding, Komachi slammed the door behind her. Her footsteps echoed along the hall for only seconds before fading into the distance. Eiki stared blankly into the space where she'd been, still paralysed.
It took her a few minutes to regain her composure and finish the job. As she did up the last button on her dress, she took a few more deep breaths as she tried to wipe this incident from her memory. The feeling of the elastic clinging to her body reminded her otherwise, but she was the only one who knew about it. She could convince Komachi she'd been seeing things, and as long as she stayed in possession of all her clothes no-one else would have to know.
Still...now she had something like this, it would probably be a shame to let it go to waste. She could probably go for a swim in the Sanzu every once in a while, or maybe while she was travelling around Gensokyo. It'd make talking with the kappa a lot easier for sure, once they got over how young it made her look.
Eiki looked up at the calendar again, once again seeing the hastily written word BIRTHDAY next to today's date.
It was written in red crayon.
"...Yumemi, the next time I see you I'm going to tell you you're crazy. Insane. Absurd. Totally incapable of logical thought."
She smiled. Her life would have been pretty boring if it wasn't for someone like that messing things up.
"And that's why I love you."
Eiki Shiki, the Yama of Xanadu, had never been one to find repetition boring.
But that didn't mean that she was against trying something new every once in a while.
-
That was hilarious, I must say. Keep up the great work Rou!
-
Ahahahahahahaha. XD
-
"Geez. I dunno if you've got some kinda stalker or somethin'. I'm gonna just go polish my scythe, so don't expect me around for a little while."
With that, Komachi stepped out again, apparently unaware that her scythe was still on top of the package.
I love Komachi.
-
Ahaha, oh wow. Thanks for the pleasing visual, Rou. :3~
The strawberry-scented package threw me off for a minute there. Though it makes me wonder what'd be in the box if it were from Ruro instead.. heh.
-
Holy dick, that fic syched up almost perfectly to "Fate of 60 years" when I read it.
Was that somehow intentional?
-
The slender legs on the desk part almost made me nosebleed.
Congratulations on managing to entertain us all (especially Ruro, I assume) once more, RoU!
-
I think I accidentally nosebled a little.
this is so cute~
-
"Ah, nothing like a good drink to help you unwind~."
Junya Ota leant back on his chair, holding a freshly-opened bottle of beer in one hand and pulling his cap down with the other. Another long, hard day working on his latest production, and by now things were starting to come together.
For once, he would give the fans what they wanted rather than try to second guess them. He'd release the demo of Touhou 13 at Reitaisai, and the full game at Comiket. No fighters, no side-projects like Uwabami Breakers that no-one played, nothing. It killed the joy a little, but it had been 15 years now. He was due a break.
"Anyway, just a little to work on for Stage 3 and-"
"W-Wait! Mr. ZUN!"
A voice from outside his window? This was only his fifth bottle today - hallucinations usually didn't settle in until about nine or ten. He spun around in his chair, too blitzed to consider getting up.
The girl pressing her face against the window looked oddly familiar. That white shirt, the black skirt turning red at the ends, the sword at her waist and that little red tokin hat on her head. For some reason, though, the animal ears coming out either side seemed a little off from what he remembered. Or maybe not, when he was drunk he got confused about a lot of things.
"I, um, have a message for you! From Miss Aya!"
She was still talking, it seemed. Usually his hallucinations weren't this coherent. Curious, ZUN slid the chair over and opened the window. The white wolf tengu, who'd been pressing against it the whole time, proceeded to lean forward into thin air.
"Ah, uwah-!"
She hit the floor face-first, her tokin falling onto the floor in front of him. He reached down and picked it up. It felt real, moreso than any delusion he'd had up until now. He was obviously becoming a pro at this whole getting drunk business.
"Hm, I think I remember you now. Momiji, right?"
The wolf nodded as she pulled herself up, blushing slightly. She hadn't been recognised by name in some time.
"But I don't remember giving you those ears. Or that tail of yours..."
"Uh, it's a long story. As strong as your power over Gensokyo is, fans are pretty powerful too."
She stood up, brushing at her skirt. ZUN's beer-addled mind took a second to process Momiji's words.
"Ah, so it's one of these Gensokyo fantasies again. Usually it's Yukari I end up seeing here. So, what's your message?"
"Ah, r-right!"
Momiji dug her left hand into her right sleeve, where the note she'd been given was secreted. She held it in front of her as she started reciting, squinting at Aya's tiny handwriting.
"Dear Mr. Junya Ota. While we at the Bunbunmaru appreciate the time and effort you put into portraying our business in your work Touhou Bunkachou - Shoot the Bullet, we feel that more could be done to prolong our relationships together. Therefore we would appreciate if, at the next annual Reitaisai, you released a follow-up to Bunkachou allowing us to delve further into the new residents of Gensokyo. Yours sincerely, Aya Shameimaru."
ZUN's eyes widened. Slightly, anyway, he wasn't sober enough to open them fully. He straightened his back slightly.
"Oh. Well, this isn't usually what happens...normally Yukari chats with me about the recent goings on and all. In fact she did that a few months ago, and I'm sort of already working on Touhou 13 right now, so...tell Aya I'm sorry, I guess."
Momiji pouted as she looked up at the hammered programmer. For an instant she started to turn around, ready to make her way back out the window. Her tail wagged a little, reminding ZUN of it's presence. It irked him slightly.
"W-Wait, there's a little note at the bottom. ...Momiji, if he doesn't co-operate, feel free to rough him up a little. Love, Aya...?"
Momiji seemed puzzled by the presence of this postscript. ZUN saw her eyes shift from the note to the sword at her side, then to him, then back to the note. One hand slid down slightly and reached for the hilt.
"...Sorry, Mr. ZUN. Orders are orders."
ZUN was too pissed to realise his life was apparently in danger. He smirked slightly.
"I love how these fantasies are so inconsistent. You realise if I die, you'll never get your game, right?"
He chuckled lightly as Momiji started to blush again. Clearly neither Aya or her had thought that far.
"I-I guess...uwah, now what? I can't tell Miss Aya that I failed..."
Her eyes scouted the room, almost absently. She didn't seem to be paying attention to anything in particular, until suddenly her head jerked to a halt and her eyes widened.
"Ah, there!"
She reached down to her waist again, this time fully unsheathing her scimitar-like blade. ZUN noticed even the light in the room bounced off the sword correctly - he was either really really drunk, or this was real.
She didn't hold the weapon towards him. She'd found a different target, and his eyes followed the blade of the tip. This time his eyes did widen when he saw what Momiji was aiming at. It was something much more precious to him than his own life, than any game he'd spend months working on.
Momiji's blade was hanging precariously over an unopened six-pack.
"Reitaisai, right?! Working on it, working on it~!"
-----
"Um, Miss Aya? The mission was a success."
"Good work, Momiji. I'll give you a bath tonight as a reward, and then it's off to get some footage for ZUN to work with! Just need a witty name for this one..."
"Hm...the project is holding back Touhou 13, and it'll probably affect sales...like a spoiler issue. And it's a sequel, sorta...how about Double Spoiler?"
"Oh, that's genius, Momiji! I'll get you some of your favourite treats for all your hard work!"
"Uuu...Miss Aya, I'm a tengu too...stupid fandom, deciding I need to be moe..."
"Eh? What was that, Momi~?"
"N-Nothing."
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That's awesome.
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Very so.
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Gah, you beat me to it. :B Also, thirding.
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Nice, but it doesn't explain THAT ARMBAND, The new hairstyle, or sudden elf-ears. 3/10.
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The new hairstyle is awesome, and that's all there's to it.
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*applause* Good show, good show.
-
The Annual Tengu Reporting Convention was not, as the name would suggest, a forum for serious conversation involving controversies and scandals within the publishing circles of Youkai Mountain. A more accurate title would have been the Annual Tengu Reporter All-Night Drinking Session, but that didn't sound quite as professional.
Normally, this was a ceremony that Aya Shameimaru would embrace with all her heart, guzzling down drinks faster than any tengu around her all while listening in on her fellow journalists 'accidentally' giving away their story for that week after one too many. Today, though, she trodded along taking a strong interest in her shoes as they left heavy imprints in the muddy earth. Everyone else had just flown to avoid the hassle, but right now she was doing her best not to be seen in case people laughed at her again. A late arrival wouldn't help her much, but there wasn't much to be done about that.
The event was taking place in one of the few bars the mountain had - most had been 'converted' by the Moriya Shrine for their 'indecency', which was godspeak for 'we could make more money out of them for something else'. Aya's tastes were a little more foreign - damn, the oni knew how to make it right! - but in the end beer was beer. She scraped the mud off her shoes as she got to the front entrance.
It wasn't until her head collided with someone's chest that Aya realised there was a bouncer.
"So what, you're a pervert off duty as well?"
Aya pulled her head back, blushing slightly. An unimpressed White Wolf Tengu stared back at her, growling.
"Oh, M-Momiji. Didn't know you were working tonight."
"Really? That's strange. Last I checked you knew everything I was doing. Don't tell me the great Shameimaru's fallen from grace?"
There was a layer of satisfaction hidden in those words, and Momiji couldn't help but grin at the sight of Aya. The crow tengu's tokin was hanging on one of her pointed ears, and her shirt was soaked through and clinging to her chest. She shook a little for the cold.
"Momiji...what happened to you? You used to be so adorable and moe..."
Momiji's foot started to tap on the floor, just where the earth stopped and the stone floor began.
"Aya, if you wouldn't mind hurrying up? You're blocking the way, and I'm going to need room to kick people out when they start throwing up."
Momiji was probably the one person here going home sober, and it didn't sound like she was very happy about it. Her hand fell to the sword at her waist, running a pair of fingers along its sheath.
The threat was enough.
"Yeah, yeah, got it. Just let me in."
Momiji gave Aya barely enough room to enter the bar. The festivities had clearly been going on for a while, from all the laughing and shouting going on as she walked in. More than once she'd come close to stabbing someone who was lying on the floor in a haze.
She wasn't here to drink, for a change. Everything that had happened to her was the fault of one man alone, a man who'd been invited to the conference as a guest speaker. The term was used semi-jokingly; of course no-one was going to be talking seriously, so he was here for other purposes instead. The man was well known for sharing the stories of Gensokyo with the outside world in the form of games, and today he was showing his latest creation to the tengu present.
Which was to say he was making people play it for the first time, whilst thoroughly drunk, and laughing at their inevitable failures.
"Ahahaha, really? You lost to Parsee? That's Easy Mode. Drink more, it'll help you concentrate."
ZUN downed yet another drink as he laughed at one tengu who could barely hold the controller. The computer had been donated by the kappa, and its sole attendant was standing next to it watching for any signs of the player getting ready to hurl. Everyone's attention was focused on the game, and the poor unlucky bastard playing it.
So of course no-one saw Aya coming from behind until it was too late.
"YOU."
Aya's voice contained pure malice as she looked down on ZUN. The drunken programmer tilted his head back, still wearing a stupid grin on his face.
"Ah, Aya-chan. What do you think of Double Spoiler~?"
He didn't seem to really register that Aya clearly didn't think he'd done that good a job. The bickering and shouting in the room quietened down so people could listen in.
"What do I think? What do I think!? What the hell did you do to me?!"
She pointed to her ears.
"The hell are these?! They looked normal before, but now all of a sudden I look like a goddamn elf! And the armband - what am I, cosplaying that SOS girl you're always rambling about?!"
Her face was turning as red as her Tokin as her rant continued. What made ZUN's games particularly special was that how he portrayed the residents of Gensokyo within them actually affected them personally. Aya had woken up one morning and found her ears suddenly stabbing into her pillow, and things only got more awkward from there.
"And Momiji - what happened to her? I walk up to her expecting her to be as adorable as usual, and what happens? She bites me! BITES ME, dammit!"
The sound of Aya slapping ZUN across the face echoed throughout the room. Total silence reigned as his glasses fell to the floor, shattering.
"Yeah, I got my pictures, but I'm a wreck now! No-one takes me seriously anymore, and even you seem to be getting distant from me. The hell is going on!?"
ZUN was roughly conscious enough now to realise that he was in hot water now. His eyes wandered around the room, looking for someone to back him up.
"Uh, well, things are complicated now. There's, well, someone else-"
"Get away from him, loser!"
A voice finally piped up from among the crowd. It was a voice that struck a chord in Aya's heart in the worst way. Its owner emerged soon after, her checkerboard skirt and strange rectangular camera giving her away even though she seemed to inexplicably be wearing ZUN's hat rather than her own.
Aya muttered under her breath.
"Hatate. You're kidding me..."
Hatate pulled herself out, running towards the programmer who had yet to rise from his seat. She wrapped her arms around him in a gesture that came across as both protection and fawning adoration.
"Deal with it, Aya. You're old news now. ZUN's moved on, and so should you."
ZUN himself blushed as Hatate's arms clutched tightly around his shoulders. He reached out and stroked her hair with one hand.
Aya's jaw just about hit the floor.
"You...you bitch! You can't do this to-"
Hatate burst into a demonic grin.
"Hey, Aya, maybe you should just go get drunk like everyone else. Otherwise some stuff might, like, get spilled that you'd rather keep private, right?"
Aya's face turned pale. She knew exactly what Hatate was getting at - she alone had managed to figure out that the incidents Aya wrote about were given more than a helping hand from the girl herself. If that came into the public, any last trace of credibility she had would slip away for good.
"D-Dammit..."
Reluctantly, Aya stepped away from the pair. Hatate pulled her head closer to ZUN's, a look of desire rising on her face. The alcohol hadn't done much for her inhibitions.
"Don't worry about her. I'm totally here for you..."
As the two started on a passionate kiss, the crowd finally started to break out into roars of applause, with a wolf-whistle or two thrown in. Aya was quickly forgotten, finding one of the seats at the bar whose owner had succumbed to gravity. She lodged herself onto it, and promptly slammed her head into the wood.
"Ayayayayayaya..."
Maybe this had all been a dream. Maybe some alcohol would make everything better again. And if not, it'd make her forget about it, at least. Either way, no reason not to start drinking now if it was on the house.
-----
Meanwhile, outside of it all, Momiji Inubashiri allowed herself a small smile.
"...And now I finally get some respect around here. About damn time."
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That is one of the funniest explainations I've seen for all the Double Spoiler changes. Nice.
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I- I- You- You-
Y U DO DIS ;-;
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ZUN X Hatate WHAT
Good times, Rou. Good times.
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I- I- You- You-
Y U DO DIS ;-;
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Hmm, yes, copious amounts of beer Could help me forget.
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Now, That was Something alright.
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This hurt me like a levitated rabbit about to dropping a stone egg while I was crucified to a cross on my head and subsequently burning my legs with pain and suffering.
Truth to be said I didn't like Aya anyway, but fuck, does this hurt.
but Hatate... is, well, modern, and yes, I do like her better...mumble mumble...
Oh yes, before I forget, Rou, you made this very interesting indeed.
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Truth to be said I didn't like Aya anyway, but fuck, does this hurt.
You know you're a good writer when you can cause this to happen. ;)
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yes.
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Oh bby.
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Apparently requests are my specialty
because I suck at acting on ideas that I come up with myself :V
---
"Haah...haah..."
Rin's body was on fire. She couldn't move an inch, but her bed covers were soaked with sweat. A hacking cough racked her tiny frame, sending waves of pain across her body. Her eyes stared blankly at the ceiling, like they had been for what felt like months.
An erhu lay on the table next to her. She remembered that she used to pass the time by playing it, maybe impressing some of her friends in the human village with her songs. Now everyone was too afraid of her illness to approach her, and she didn't even have the strength to lift it herself. How long ago had that been? Days? Weeks? Since the fever struck the days had merged together, and she'd lost track of time.
"It...It hurts..."
She remembered Reimu, looking down at her with those deep red eyes of hers. The tears that fell onto her forehead were enough to cool her down for a while. She'd simply sat over the bed, beating her head against the table, constantly repeating 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry...', growing more hysterical until eventually Marisa had to drag her out. They disappeared into the red mist almost as soon as they'd walked out of the door.
The red mist. She'd known her body was frail, but at the time it just looked like dust in the air. It hadn't started to take effect until later that night. Most of the children simply suffered a mild cough, but Rin's body just wasn't strong enough to fight off the disease that it had brought around. The adults had gathered around her, saying there was nothing that could be done now, comforting her parents as they warned them to keep their distance.
"No...I'm not...going to...give up..."
Rin smiled, disregarding the pain it caused her. She was going to get better, then she and Reimu and Marisa would go and find out who caused the mist, and they'd stop it and beat up whoever was responsible and make friends with them. Her mind was as strong and optimistic as ever.
But her body couldn't match that strength.
"Aah...ack-"
A breath caught in her throat. Her body tried to cough on reflex, but no response came. Rin's arms started to force themselves to move as she started to choke - one grabbing at her throat, the other flailing around wildly. It reached out onto the table for something, anything that could help.
She was only barely conscious enough to recognise the sound of an erhu being knocked off the table onto the floor. The sound of the instrument snapping in two was audible.
"!!"
Rin's hand reached down to the floor, towards one of the broken pieces of wood. She struggled to wrap her fingers around it, placing it in her grasp. Everything hurt, she couldn't see, she couldn't breathe, she could barely think. Her body had reached its absolute limit, and every nerve was screaming in agony.
And then, almost out of mercy, the pain stopped.
The hand she'd stretched out went limp as it fell on the erhu's shattered strings. She lay still on the bed, her face unusually serene for a girl who had been through so much pain. Her chest was motionless.
And beneath those sweat-ridden sheets, Rin Satsuki's heart slowly came to a stop.
---
The next time she opened her eyes, she was welcomed by a sea of cherry blossoms.
"H...uh...?"
The rickety wooden bed she had been lying on had been replaced with cold, hard stone. Her hand reached down and touched it, confirming it was as uncomfortable as surfaces could get, but yet her body didn't seem to be in any pain.
"Am I...hallucinating?"
Rin looked down on herself as she rose to her feet. She was still in the pink blouse she had been wearing earlier, much drier than she remembered it being, and she felt the underdress beneath it still in place. She had been lying on some sort of staircase, seemingly continuing infinitely in both directions, and at its sides were a long line of majestic cherry trees, all in perfect bloom.
If this was in her mind, she'd certainly chosen a very beautiful hallucination. She walked up to the nearest tree, placing her hand on it in appreciating of its wonder.
"Oh."
As her hand slipped through, into the tree itself, Rin was only slightly surprised. For a moment, she allowed a pout to run across her face.
"So...I guess I'm dead."
"You are perceptive, child. Most humans would descend into denial at a time like this."
Another voice emerged from the staircase above her, echoing as it crossed the distance between them. Its owner didn't sound much older than she was, and as Rin made her way up the stairs she noticed she looked a similar age as well. Her light blue eyes seemed wise beyond her years, though, and her hair was a light shade of grey. The twin blades hanging at her waist looked like they were designed for a true master.
"It is a refreshing change to see one so at peace with their own demise. Welcome to Hakugyokurou, Miss Satsuki."
The girl proceeded to bow towards Rin - an awkward scene given that she was still standing on a higher stair. A white wisp emerged from behind her back as she knelt down, the hem of her green dress touching the floor. Rin blushed slightly.
"Um, thank you. Pleased to meet you too, Miss...?"
"Youmu. Youmu Konpaku. The pleasure is mine, but there is no time for formalities."
Youmu quickly took Rin by the hand, darting up the staircase at a speed her companion could barely keep up with. Apparently the dead could take form at will, otherwise Youmu would have let go of her the instant she'd broken away. For a moment Rin was scared she'd trip on the stairs, but as she looked down and saw her feet weren't even touching the floor that fear faded to the back of her mind.
"W-Wait! Where are we going? And why are we in such a hurry!?"
Youmu was hesitant to answer, taking a few seconds to turn her head. She didn't slow down in the slightest.
"These are questions you should offer my mistress, not me."
With that Youmu turned back to the staircase, continuing to lead Rin upwards. Realising there was no point in asking further Rin just allowed herself to be carried along. There was no use fighting anymore, after all. That was what life was for, anyway.
The lines of cherry trees at their sides continued all the way up the staircase, which Youmu was climbing faster than any human ever could. A trip that would take most men half an hour took her only a few minutes, and soon Rin felt her foot take shape again on the last of the stone steps. A clearing stood in front of them, and in its centre stood an even larger tree than any that Rin had seen on the way here, although with none of the beauty - this tree was dead, it seemed, never set to bloom again. Rin frowned at the thought.
At the foot of the tree was a shrine, old but well-kept. Its door hung open, and as Youmu let go of her hand she ran ahead towards the door. Rin had just about got the hang of taking form by now, and ran behind her at a slower pace. It felt exhilarating - she'd never been able to deal with physical strain in life, so it was fun to be able to run like this without getting tired.
"Lady Yuyuko! I have brought her."
Youmu stopped at the doorway, calling inside. As Rin caught up another voice echoed back from within the shrine.
"Ah, punctual as always. Good work, Youmu. You're excused."
Youmu bowed, turning to Rin once and offering a nod before running back the way she came down the staircase. Rin had never seen anyone with as much energy, but then again she'd been dead for all of five minutes.
"Don't be shy, Miss Satsuki. I imagine your last moments were quite the ordeal. I've made some tea for you."
The voice from inside beckoned her again. It was a young woman's, and it rang with a genuine concern that made Rin feel at ease even as she walked into the residence of a woman she'd never met before. As she entered the shrine itself, a folding door hung open at her side, and she could make out a kotatsu within. Assuming this was where her host was waiting for her, Rin stepped in and placed her legs beneath the kotatsu. She smiled as its warmth started to work its way into her body. The ability to take form at will was proving handier than she'd thought.
"I hope you like green tea. I'm afraid that's all we have up here."
From the next room along, her host - Yuyuko, from what she'd heard - finally emerged holding a pair of cups, steam wafting off their tops. She was dressed in a traditional kimono, in shades of blue and pink, and her light pink hair reminded Rin of the blossoms that she'd seen on the way up here. A mop hat with a wisp-like insignia sat on her head as she placed one of the cups in front of Rin.
"Enjoy. Youmu may take care of most of the work around here, but she'll never make tea like I can."
Yuyuko smiled as Rin gripped the cup. She'd never been a fan of tea in life - too hot for her liking, but now she could basically ignore the heat and enjoy the flavour. As she sipped at the tea, she found its bitter aftertaste surprisingly pleasing. She grinned.
"Thank you. It tastes really nice, ma'am."
Yuyuko gave off a hearty laugh.
"Ohohoh~! Such manners from a child your age. It truly is a shame that you met the end you did."
It had been painful, hadn't it? By now she could barely remember her own last moments. All she could recall was reaching out for her erhu, and then nothing. She sipped at her tea quietly.
"There isn't any use complaining, is there? We die when we die, right?"
For a moment, Yuyuko was taken aback by Rin's words. They conveyed a maturity, an acceptance that woman three times her age often lacked. Her host let out an impressed sigh.
"You are an impressive sight. The red mist has taken a truly tragic victim."
The mist. She remembered that, and for a moment fear registered in her eyes. Were Reimu and Marisa going to go on without her?
"I see what you're thinking, and I can assure you those two will be fine. You have reliable friends, I can tell you that much."
Rin sighed herself. Maybe there was no point in worrying about herself anymore, but her friends still had their own lives to live. It would have been a shame if they'd just thrown them away for her sake after she'd already passed on.
For a few minutes, the pair just sat and drank together. Rin complimented the gardening, while Yuyuko humbly said that Youmu had been responsible for keeping the blossoms in check. For a while, Rin even forgot that she had died entirely and simply accepted the company of this new friend of hers.
Yuyuko cut that atmosphere short with one sentence.
"You aren't supposed to be here, you know."
Rin tilted her head, puzzled.
"Not yet, at least. Your soul should have been passed to Higan and judged by the Yama, then sent here to spend the rest of eternity. That is how the cycle has always worked.
But I have been watching you, Rin. Watching as your illness took hold, putting you under more pain that children your age should be able to stand. I had to bring it upon myself to end your suffering a little early - my apologies, but it hurt to see you in such agony."
Yuyuko looked away, her face falling.
"And...I don't believe you deserved a death like that. You had such potential - you could have helped so many people, done so much for the world, and all of it will never happen now that you're gone. It's not my place to say as such, of course - my responsiblity is death, not life.
So...I've brought you here to offer you a second chance, in short."
Yuyuko placed her cup on the kotatsu, rising up. Her face turned deathly serious as she looked down at Rin.
"I cannot offer you much. If I were to make your rebirth too obvious I'd be discovered and your soul would inevitably pay a price for accepting the offer. Your new life will not resemble your old one in any way, but you will live again. You'll have another chance to do something good for the world.
But you'll know all the hardships of life again. You'll forget your time here, and your time as Rin Satsuki. You'll be forced to experience sadness, pain, tragedy, and suffering. I would not force that upon you unless you would willingly accept it."
There was a long, painful silence. Rin's eyes stared off into the distance as she pondered the offer, her face staying neutral in spite of all the conflicting ideas running through her head.
"...Maybe you're right. Maybe I'll forget everything, maybe I'll have to suffer if you let me go back. But still...it's them I'm worried about, not me."
Reimu and Marisa probably found her dead and buried her before resolving the red mist incident. They couldn't have taken it well, and it just felt wrong to leave them suffering so.
"If there's even a chance - even the tiniest chance that I can meet them again, in any form, I'll take it. So...I'll take you up on your offer, Miss."
Yuyuko closed her eyes, smiling to herself.
"So self-sacrificing for the sake of others. I knew I had chosen well."
From over here Rin could barely see, but there seemed to be a tear running down Yuyuko's cheek. Her host brushed it away before starting to walk around the kotatsu to the still-seated Rin.
"Very well, then. Perhaps you should take a nap now...it's been a long day for you. You deserve a rest."
Rin was about to disagree with the idea. She felt wide awake, ready to go, set for anything. But as Yuyuko's hand slipped onto her shoulder, she felt a sudden urge to rest her eyes. Just for a little while, at least. She'd wake up in a little bit for sure...
---
"Agh."
Rin shook herself awake as the dream came to the same end it always did. It wasn't a nightmare, technically - she didn't find it frightening so much as she found it annoying nowadays.
"Wish my brain could at least be a little more creative, though..."
It was a strange dream in that it always stayed at the front of her mind for a few seconds, but then it would just slip out of her head entirely. She didn't even have time to write anything about it before it was just 'that dream I always end up forgetting'.
It was too late in the morning now to get back to sleep, so Rin decided to just wake up and get dressed. One thing she always seemed to do after the dream was look through her clothes for a red ribbon to put in her hair. She'd never owned anything like that, though - black had always been her colour, and she ended up wearing the same black ribbons as always anyway.
The other feeling that always came with this dream was the feeling that she was in someone else's body. Her head always felt weird, like there were a pair of flaps that didn't belong there. It took a quick run-across her scalp with one hand to remind her that those were her ears.
Then there was the feeling of something stuck to her back, just above her hind quarters. Again, another hand slipping down to check before she slapped herself in the face and told herself off.
"Calm down, already. That's your tail."
She never told anyone about these dreams, mainly because it sort of felt like she was going insane. By the time anyone else was awake she'd have it entirely out of her head - which was good, because otherwise her master would find out whether she liked it or not.
Eventually, the rest of the household awakened. Rin was hanging over her friend's body as she rose from whatever dream she'd been having. There were times when Rin wondered if the girl ever stopped dreaming at all, and she just spent all day sleepwalking. It would explain a lot in terms of her brainpower, if nothing else.
"Unyu..."
She let out a groan as she woke up, her long black hair curling in every direction. Her eyes pulled themselves open, looking up lazily.
"Eh...morning, Rin."
Immediately the girl hanging over her waved a finger in her face. For some reason, being called by her name always gave her the chills. That was why she'd come up with her own nickname instead.
"Okuu, how many times do I have to tell you? Call me Orin, nya!"
-
Fantastic as always. Keep up the good work.
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I already told you that I loved this, but I think it bares repeating. I love this. You are an awesome human being for having written this
, and I want to have your babies ahem~
Keep up the good work, please~ Your stuff's always great, really, and it's a real pleasure to read whenever I get the time to check it out.
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You know, at the beginning, I was quite prepared to go "baww, darkfic", but ultimately, I do believe it made my head explode from awesome. ;)
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Amazing as always. Although it was easy to predict what happened as soon as I saw the words "second chance". :V
But criticism:
(...) Reimu, looking down at her with those deep red eyes of hers.
Her eyes have always looked brown to me :<
It changes a lot. They're definitely red during IN/PoFV, for example. lolzunart
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Yeah, both Marisa and Reimu's eyes have shifted ridiculously throughout the games.
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Awesome story!
When I read the first sentence, I was like yay orin fic, then I was like oh it's Rin Satsuki. I was surprised when I realise she was Orin :o, did she time travel to live her whole life as Orin?
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I'm not a big fan of Rin Satsuki - and Orin is actually pretty high on my tohosort (like top 5 iirc) but I actually went into this story thinking of Satsuki first. I'm just so used to Rin Kaenbyou being Orin and not Rin that I couldn't see a Rin to be Orin till the end...
And by then, Orin as Rin STILL hadn't occured to me, so when she's going through her physical checklist I was all like 'OMGWTF WHO DID SHE REINCARNATE AS ALREADY'
I am a shameful Orin fan.
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for one who claims they write poor fiction you are incredibly enthusiastic in carrying out requests, with flair as well.
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Blame E-Mouse for this one. :V
-----
Perhaps she should have seen it coming. Yukari-sama had dropped more than her fair share of hints over the months beforehand.
"You have that maternal touch, Ran. It's a shame you won't find a suitor."
"Have you ever wondered what this place would sound like with a few more fox-feet patting around?"
"It must be boring having only Chen to take care of while I'm asleep..."
Back then, she had simply assumed that comments like those were jokes, or jibes at how she was getting old. She should have known better than anyone that Yukari Yakumo never said anything if there wasn't a meaning of some sort behind it.
And now, here she was, rising awake along with the sun, with four young youkai curled up next to her.
She didn't like talking about how it had happened. It was the sort of ridiculous situation that the perverted residents beyond the border would cook up to create a pregnancy where none was possible. She'd forgotten the name - funatari, or something like that - but if anyone ever pressed her on it her most detailed reply would be 'Yukari-sama was screwing around again'. Anyone who properly knew Yukari was well aware that there was no point in asking beyond that.
The birth was another memory that Ran didn't want to bring up. It hurt, and that was all she was willing to say. It had been three years since, and Ran had just about managed to get the hang of motherhood. And besides that, there was something heartwarming about the feeling of someone snuggling up against your tails in their sleep.
She whispered, so as not to startle her children from their sleep too roughly.
"Good morning."
"Good morning, mother."
Three voices chimed out in response, and Ran felt her tails getting a little lighter as her children woke up. Though they were slow to grow physically, kitsune children were almost always intelligent enough to understand speech by the age of two. One tail, though, was still being pinned down, its resident grumbling to herself about wanting five more minutes or something. Ran reached down with one hand and ruffled the dozy fox's hair.
"Come on, Akai. Time to wake up."
The child groaned, but it was a groan of surrender rather than resistance. She slowly lifted herself to her feet, rubbing at her eyes and pulling down her light red shirt.
"Yeah, yeah, morning..."
Akai had always been the most rebellious of the litter. Ran still had fond memories of the days where she'd nudge her sisters aside to get to her breast, and even now she had a nasty habit of taking up two or three tails at once when bedtime rolled around. She was always the child who snuggled up the closest, though, so Ran couldn't hold it against her.
With the children awake, the first order of business for the day was breakfast. The dining table in the Yakumo residence had doubled in size since Ran had become a parent, and she had taken up one half of it with herself and her brood. Ran sat at one end of the table, while her children flanked her, two on each side. There was no set hierarchy about who sat where, but Akai always took the closest seat she could, and leaned it ever so slightly towards her mother whenever she thought she could get away with it. One of these days Ran would have to give her the talk about how she had to give equal time to her sisters as well.
As usual, the girls divided breakfast duty between themselves. Kiro and Midori would set the table, Aoi would hand out the ingredients as Ran needed them, and Akai, in her own words, would 'stand by mom's side and make sure she's doing it right'. Ran honestly wanted to tell her 'it's tofu and I've been cooking it for centuries, I think I know what I'm doing' some mornings, but there were no other chores for Akai to do at the time, and she'd learned the hard way that leaving Akai to her own devices was a recipe for disaster. Yukari-sama still hadn't forgiven her completely for what her sisters had labelled 'The Alopecia Incident'. Or at least, that was the name Aoi had given it and her sisters had unanimously agreed with, murmuring 'what do those big words mean?'
"Here's the salt, mother."
Aoi's voice carried a hint of pride as she handed the next ingredient over to Ran, a few grains slipping onto her light blue nightgown. She had always been the smartest of the bunch, and she'd taken every chance she could find to flaunt it. Sometimes Ran would find her with her nose buried in a dictionary, building up her vocabulary piece by piece. She'd always been a specialist with language, though - math was one of her few weaknesses, but she brushed it off as 'something the kappa are supposed to be doing'.
The table had been set up by now, but Midori and Kiro had stolen away a napkin and pulled out a pencil, playing a game of tic-tac-toe. Or rather, they had already gone though half a dozen games, and Kiro was growing more irritated with every one.
"Midori-chan, why are you so good at this?"
Midori smiled quietly. Her light green eyes flickered as the light struck them.
"I don't know. I start on my favourite square every time, and you always start right next to me. I guess it's just talent."
Of course, Midori knew for a fact that it wasn't - she'd always win if Kiro just kept making the same mistake with her first move. Ran turned around for a moment to watch the game, and smiled at the sight of Midori's manipulative ways. Kitsune were natural-born tricksters, after all, so to show this proficiency at her age was something to commend.
"Hey. It's boiling over."
Akai tugged at Ran's sleeve, reminding her of the tofu sitting in front of her.
"Ah, sorry. Good call, too - looks like it's about ready, too."
Saving the meal in the nick of time, Ran finished with cooking the tofu and cut it into six equal slices. Akai and Aoi slipped over to their seats as their mother applied the finishing touches to their meal. They had always been the two sisters with the worst relationship - mainly Aoi picking on Akai for being so clingy. These arguments had come to an abrupt end two months ago, when Akai had been the first of the children to learn how to use danmaku. She could only produce one bullet, but it was enough to catch Aoi off guard, and since then the more educated sister had settled for sticking her tongue out when Ran wasn't looking.
As Ran returned to the table, the sixth seat was abruptly taken. At the chair across from Ran a large purple gap opened, and a young woman emerged from within and took her place. Four voices greeted her at once.
"Good morning, Yukari-sama."
Unfortunately, one of those voices was Ran's.
"Mornin', grandma."
Akai's concept of humour was, to be short, not to Yukari's liking. The gap youkai's hands curled up into fists as she resisted the urge to open up a gap beneath the young fox's chair and drop her into the Blazing Fires. Ran had been like this, once - she had survived that childhood, so she could certainly survive another.
"G-Good morning, all of you."
Ran walked up to the table, placing a piece of tofu in front of each person seated while leaving one for herself. For Ran and her children this was breakfast; for Yukari, this was supper. She would go to sleep after this, leaving Ran and her brood to take care of the house during the day. For now, though, it was time to eat, and the household worked through their helpings on tofu in relative silence.
At Ran's side, across from the ever-approaching Akai, Kiro was doodling on another napkin. Initially Ran simply assumed that her daughter was drawing, or maybe playing tic-tac-toe with herself to figure out how Midori was always winning. On closer observation, though, she saw that Kiro was practicing her mathematics, writing out the times tables in the smallest writing she could. As the girl's golden eyes focused on her perfect calculations, Ran smiled as she noted that one of her children had inherited her love for numbers.
And so went breakfast. Again, the girls divided up the chores - Aoi cleaned the dishes, Midori dried, Kiro put them away, and Akai 'stopped Mom from getting lonely'. Ran would take this time to have a talk with Yukari, given it was about the only time she wasn't running around the house keeping her kin in check.
"So, it looks like you've just about got the hang of things."
Ran accepted the compliment humbly, bowing her head.
"My thanks, Yukari-sama. I imagine I must have been as troublesome as them in my own youth, so I'm grateful to you for looking after me as well."
Yukari chuckled, reminiscing over the days when Ran would try and calculate pi to as many decimal places as she could and ended up using the wall when the paper she was using ran out of space. That had been centuries ago, and since then Ran had grown into a fine, proud shikigami.
"...Though, Yukari-sama. Isn't there something missing?"
It had been a niggling feeling in the back of Ran's mind for a while. Something had seemed out of place, something Ran couldn't put her finger on exactly. Yukari stared off into the distance, pondering in unison with her servant. Akai followed their eyes, not sure what everyone was looking at.
"Hmm...I know what you mean...something feels strange about the household. Something isn't here..."
---
"Unyaa..."
Chen lay her head on Orin's lap, moaning slightly. Her fellow cat stroked her behind the ears to try and cheer her up.
"Wow, that's pretty harsh. So after she had her own kids, she just lost track of you?"
"R-Ran-sama tried at first, but...they were all so loud and they needed so much time, and...nyaa, I miss her..."
Orin kept scratching behind Chen's ears as the shikigami tried her best not to cry.
"Don't worry, kid. You can move in with me, y'know? Satori-sama doesn't mistreat her pets."
Chen looked up at Orin, enawed.
"R-Really? She'll take me in?"
"Course she will! She's a really great judge of character. It's like she knows everything you want before you even ask for it..."
-
CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!
;-;
-
Oh my god I hate you you made me cry why would you do that aaaaagh
-
*sings "Die In A Fire" to the tune of "Dracula's Castle" from SotN*
-
*sings "Die In A Fire" to the tune of "Dracula's Castle" from SotN*
Is this a new song now, that we've created? 'Die in a Fire' as arranged by the MotKians?
-
I want a full length version of this. :3
-
Gentlemen, I have come to the conclusion that Rou will continue to mess with us until we are gibbering emotional wrecks. However, we will probably enjoy the process, so carry on.
-
Gentlemen, I have come to the conclusion that Rou will continue to mess with us until we are gibbering emotional wrecks. However, we will probably enjoy the process, so carry on.
It's his superpower.
Mine is the ability to catch every possible red light on the way to work.
-
<ToumaKanou|RFJ> Also Beelolis overrun Gensokyo
...
<Sapz|Away> Go with Zengar's beeloli idea
<Sapz|Away> You should listen to him
<Roukan> Welp, two votes. Guess that makes it popular demand. :V
-----
"Ah, another fine day, isn't it?"
There was no-one else standing in the field, though the sunflowers were tall enough to make that hard for her to verify at the time. Of course she had never intended to talk to a person - the objects of her affection were all around her.
"And you're all looking so bright and healthy today!"
Yuka strolled across the Garden of the Sun, using her parasol to stop the sunlight from blinding her. She held her hand out at her side, stroking the leaves of the sunflowers as if she were performing a handshake. Her bright red eyes were filled with joy at her handiwork - every flower in this field had been planted, fed and cared for by her, and considering the size of this place that was quite an achievement.
There was a wonderful silence as she continued walking by herself, occasionally adjusting her red plaid waistcoat while stopping her matching skirt catching on any of her masterpieces. Only the occasional gust of wind distracted Yuka from her own little utopia.
"...Hm?"
It was a very faint sound, to the point where for a moment Yuka didn't think she had even heard it. She cupped an ear, listening out to see if it would get any louder.
Slowly, a buzzing noise started to reach her.
"Bees? Here?"
She had never seen the need to let bees into her garden. Her flowers did not pollinate - they simply were, and thanks to her endless devotion (and substantial magic power) they could stay as such for centuries. Bees were annoying - loud, and distracting. She would take care of this problem the way she took care of most problems - shoot it until it was no longer a concern.
Yuka took her time as she headed towards the source of the buzzing. She had never been the sort of youkai to rush - after all, it only meant she would arrive tired, if a little earlier. The buzzing grew louder, obviously, as she approached.
But it shouldn't have become this loud.
There were clearly more bees than she'd thought. Their source seemed to be coming from one sunflower whose head had been pulled down out of sight, bees rising up from it at an alarmingly fast rate. A few dozen, no, a few hundred, no, a thousand-
"Aah!"
Their numbers seemed to be multiplying by the second, and by now the buzzing was enough to make Yuka's ears hurt. She held her fingers in them to keep herself sane, walking towards the drooping flower and leaning her head down.
She found a young girl, in a yellow and black striped dress and a needle coming out of her rear, doing her best to suck the nectar out of the flower. With each drop she swallowed a flock of bees would emerge from her long black hair and rise into the air, until at last she had drained the sunflower of all it had.
"Ah...better than I thought. The flowers in this field are really tasty."
She let go of the sunflower, expecting it to return to its standing pose. It instead responded by falling to the ground entirely, all its colour fading. The bee youkai giggled.
"Heheh, oops. Guess I took a little more than nectar~"
She shrugged, laughing to herself. She was blissfully unaware of the flower youkai standing behind her, with a smile that would chill the blood of anything that lived.
Or at least, she was unaware until the parasol collided harshly with the back of her head.
"Owwie!"
The bee youkai fell heat first into the dirt, clinging at her head for a short while. Yuka prepared to seize the advantage and stomp on her while she was down, but once again the buzzing sound filled her ears.
"Whoa, w-what is it? What is it?!"
Yuka covered her ears as she stood up, and saw a black mark running across the sky. A huge shad fell on the garden as it blocked out the sun itself, all while letting off that demonic buzzing sound.
"Oh, no. Not the bees. Not the bees!"
The patch in the sky started to fall towards Yuka with astounding speed. It broke up into thousands, millions of bees, each one insistent on protecting its master.
They swarmed Yuka in an instant, too fast for her to react.
"AAAAAH! OH GOD, MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAH! AAAAAAH!"
The flower youkai flailed around helplessly as the bees overwhelmed her, while meanwhile the bee youkai controlling them rose to her feet. She wiped the dirt off her face, smiling at Yuka's plight.
"Aw, poor you~ That's what you get for messing with Zatsuza-chan!"
She was the youkai form of a video game character, sent to Gensokyo because she had been too difficult to unlock and no-one believed she really existed. The power of manipulation of bees wouldn't have sounded very fearsome otherwise, but Yuka was clearly not doing too well.
Or so it had seemed.
"Flower Sign [Reflowering of Gensokyo]!"
A sphere of beautiful golden bullets erupted from within the swarm of bees, tearing apart the attackers completely. Zatsuza herself was far away enough to dodge the attack with ease, but her minions had not been so lucky. Yuka put away her spell card, uninjured besides for a few new holes in her parasol.
"It must have been entertaining for you, thinking you could win with a pitiful army like that. Well, how does it feel now~?"
Yuka lifted up her parasol, ready to strike again. Zatsuza grimaced, stepping back as her eyes flashed gold.
"You...you have robbed me of everything I possessed! Y-Y'know, what you've done to me is just plain unforgivable!"
Zatsuza rose into the air, a yellow aura rising around her. Yuka watched her with morbid curiosity as the bee youkai's eyes grew less and less sane.
"I'll...I'll punish you myself and see to it that you die a miserable death with my AWESOME weapon!"
She clicked her fingers, and immediately the aura ignited into a wall of fire that surrounded Zatsuza entirely. Her eyes were a pure shade of gold now, and she swung one arm haphazardly at Yuka as she revealed a spellcard. For some reason, a song started playing from nowhere in particular. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MY9LTWjcvq0)
"DIE, MAGGOT! LEADER BEE [PEACEFUL DEATH]!"
As the last word slipped out of her mouth, an impossibly-dense barrage of bullets emerged from her in two specific shades of red and blue. For a moment, Yuka simply stared at the bullets as they approached, far too quick and numerous for her to ever hope to dodge.
"Oh, what the fuck is this?!"
Yuka pulled out her parasol, her hand reaching into it. She touched a spellcard attached to the inside of the parasol, and immediately its white colour grew blindingly radiant.
"Sun Sign [Master Spark]!"
A brilliant beam of white light, as strong as the light from the sun itself, burst through the bullet barrage and straight towards the still burning Zatsuza. Yuka wondered for a moment why her clothes didn't seem to be burning, but she soon decided staying alive was her top priority at the moment. The bee grimaced for a moment, but with another click of her fingers a blue shield surrounded her, absorbing the spark completely.
"GODDAMN BOMB INVINCIBILITY!"
Yuka shouted out in frustration as her attack failed, the last few specks of light fading away. The impossible barrage came towards her again, unfazed by her previous efforts.
Wait. Maybe it wasn't impossible. Yuka examined the pattern closely, and sure enough a plan came to her. She whipped out one last card in the nick of time, the red and blue bullets almost stabbing into her chest.
"Phantasm [Nature's Beauty]!"
Every bullet Zatsuza had fired was nullified for an instant. Yuka stood where she was, smiling proudly but otherwise doing nothing.
"...Eh?"
The bee youkai was confused, watching as her attack started again. The flower youkai didn't even make an attempt to dodge, and after two desperate bombs from her opponent Zatsuza's attack finally made contact, striking her opponent hundreds of times over.
Yuka's body instantly dissolved into a pile of sunflower petals.
"Wha...a fake-"
A tap on her shoulder. Zatsuza was unkeen on turning around, but she forced herself to do it anyway.
"Ah, the old 'second Yuka' trick. Works every time~."
Yuka smiled in one of the most frightening manners Zatsuza could even imagine. The bee youkai turned around fully, ending her barrage back in the flower youkai's direction.
Only to watch every bullet miss completely.
"Huh!?"
Yuka had spotted a weakness in Zatsuza's attack - a single point in space where none of the bullets would strike her. Better still, it was almost right in front of Zatsuza herself, and given that she had no melee capabilities it would be all too easy to beat her to a pulp with that umbrella of hers.
"Now, I think I need to pay you back for that poor, innocent sunflower you killed, don't you?"
Yuka lifted her parasol, ready to smack Zatsuza with full force this time. Her opponent, trapped in place by her own declaration, only managed to get out one last cry before her opponent's attack hit.
"D-DAMN YOU, SAFESPOTS!"
Pichu~n!
The bullets behind Yuka dissipated, and the music from before came to a halt. The flower youkai allowed herself one sigh at having rid herself of the intruder, then another to recover from the exertion that it had taken to do so.
"...I haven't had to declare so many cards in such a short time in years. I can't imagine a human could ever have defeated her. Not that that's a problem for me and my sunflo-"
Yuka looked down at the Garden of the Sun, her face falling completely as she realised that the bullets Zatsuza had been throwing about had been effective in killing everything in the area except her. Freshly cut sunflowers lay strewn on the ground, decades of work destroyed in a single barrage.
The handle of Yuka's parasol snapped in her hand.
"FFFFFFFFFFFF-"
-
:V
If it involves Yuuka, I shall be the first to meet it.
-
I was waiting for Hibachi-chan, buuuuuuuuut
She clicked her fingers, and immediately the aura ignited into a wall of fire that surrounded Zatsuza entirely. Her eyes were a pure shade of gold now, and she swung one arm haphazardly at Yuka as she revealed a spellcard. For some reason, a song started playing from nowhere in particular. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MY9LTWjcvq0)
Oh geez.
I lol'd. :]
-
But I liked my Sagat VS Shou idea. :<
This is good too though!
-
Rou.
You are the greatest person I have ever met, and this is the best piece of fiction ever to be written. That was GLORIOUS.
/me brofists
Oh man, that Wickerman part cracked me up so hard, ahahahaha.
-
BEES.mp3
you are awesome
-
Bees.
My god.
-
I am so tempted to post some kind of BEES demotivationals. Possibly involving that socially ackward bee thing.
-
(http://img705.imageshack.us/img705/2669/beefro.th.jpg) (http://img705.imageshack.us/i/beefro.jpg/)
Awesome.
-
"I'll...I'll punish you myself and see to it that you die a miserable death with my AWESOME weapon!"
Hahaha you did not do that did you
-
I'm not really into Orin. Actually, I barely know anything about her. But I always liked Satsuki Rin for some reason, and this is awesome.
-
And now for a very much unexpected follow-up. (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?topic=1681.msg307646#msg307646)
---
"Awful dusty in here."
It had been a few years since Ran had given this place a good once-over. Up until now she had always trusted the cleaning job to Midori, but recently she'd started to suspect her daughter was doing her best to cut corners where it wouldn't be noticed. She'd been tempted to give Midori a good talking-to about it, but the children were entering adolescence now. It was a phase, or at least that's what the book from Kourindou had said on the subject. A slightly smaller helping of desert tomorrow night would probably be enough to get the point across.
Ran tiptoed into the back of the room, trying her best not to disturb the girls sleeping next door. There were still boxes piled up here - old belongings that needed to be moved to make room so the kids had somewhere to sleep. They'd long outgrown the days of sleeping on their mother's tails, though Akai had gone to painful effort to make her pillow out of the same material. Painful for Ran, anyway.
Careful steps carried her into the sea of boxes, resisting the urge to sneeze as she brought up a wave of dust into the air. Midori had been taking shortcuts, alright. Maybe her slice of tomorrow's cake would 'accidentally' fall to the floor...
"Hm?"
Behind the boxes, well out of view from the rest of the room, there was something lying in a forgotten corner. Its shape seemed familiar to Ran, though she couldn't immediately remember why. Curious, she slipped through the maze of boxes to get to it.
She reached down, and picked it up with one hand. It was soft, some sort of fabric, and pulling it up Ran saw that it was some sort of poofy hat, a dark shade of green. She examined it for a moment, puzzled.
...Is this Midori's? I don't remember ever seeing her wear it...but I remember making it. Why do I-
An image jumped into her head. A smiling face, belonging to a girl wearing the hat she now held in her hand. It wasn't one of her children, though - it was a different girl entirely, in a red dress with a pair of cat ears-
"Ah...!"
Sixteen years hadn't been enough to wipe her memory entirely. Ran had bonded with the hat's owner for centuries, taken her as her own.
And now she finally realised what had been missing all this time.
---
Meanwhile, in the next room along, four teenage youkai were snuck up tightly in their beds, getting a good night's rest as per their mother's orders.
Or at least, that's what Ran thought. In truth, her children were never very diligent when it came to bedtime - about the only child who ever really paid attention to the curfew any more was Kiro, currently rolling around in her sleep and letting off a quiet murmur or two.
"...Mmm...ehehe, so pretty..."
No-one else knew quite what she was talking about, and she never seemed to remember the dreams by the time morning came around, so apparently it would forever remain a mystery. Kiro had ended up falling behind in terms of maturity, and it was no secret between the other sisters that she was an easy target for pranks and tricks.
In particular, Midori was very 'close' to Kiro in this regard, and tonight one of her sister's long pigtails was enticingly in reach. Currently, though, she was practicing her quick shuffling, keeping track of every card in the deck as she moved them faster than the eye could comprehend. She'd practiced skills like this habitually for years, but her magical heritage gave her talent greater than any human. Why bother with simply counting cards when you could know exactly where every single card was?
"...Psst. Midori. You awake?"
A whisper from the bed across from her. Midori made a mental note of the deck order before lifting her head out from beneath the covers to respond.
"No, I'm sound asleep. You're dreaming again, Akai."
Midori made it a habit to never give a straight answer to any question if she could get away with it. Her riposte earned her a bored look from her sister, with a yawn to accompany it.
"Yeah, yeah, very funny. Just thought I oughta ask you something."
Even with just their heads poking out, it was still easy enough to tell the sisters apart. They had all inherited their mother's golden-brown hair, but they all wore it in different styles - Midori's hair ran long down her back, while Akai had kept hers at shoulder length. Even without that, though, Akai's eyes were a bright crimson, while Midori's where a much more laid-back shade of green.
"Thing is, a buncha the spellcards I was working on have gone missing. I'm pretty sure I can make out the sound of you shuffling cards down there, so..."
"They're playing cards, Akai. Just get some sleep."
A well-rehearsed lie, as Midori slipped a few cards of a different colour to the bottom of the deck. She looked down, turning back to her practice as she started shuffling again.
Her efforts were interrupted by a pillow slamming into her face.
"Seriously, Midori. Mom and I spent ages working on those, so give 'em back while I'm still asking nicely."
Midori pulled away the pillow, pulling herself back upright. She should have known better than to take the cards, she decided - not only was Akai still as clingy as ever, but she was easily the strongest of the four both physically and in terms of danmaku. Looking up, she saw her sister pouting as if she'd been the one taking the hit.
"Okay, okay, point taken. More cards makes it more of a challenge, but they were hard to shuffle anyway."
Midori removed the bottom three cards from the deck, handing them over to Akai. She passed back the pillow for good measure, knowing she'd inevitably ask for that back as well.
"Ruling through fear again, I see. Kaiser Akai never fails to get what she wants, does she?"
A third voice joined the fray, its owner burrowed under her covers with a book in hand. A single ball of light was balanced above her other hand, providing a light source so that she could make out what she was reading. A pair of glasses hung in front of her light blue eyes, and her hair was tied in a well-kept ponytail.
"Kyzur...? If you're gonna mock me, at least do it in a language I can understand, Aoi!"
"Not my fault you don't speak a word of German, is it?"
Currently her attention was focused on the book in front of her, an obscure piece written in a language that almost none of Gensokyo recognised. Her mother had called it Cyrillic, and said it was the language of a country far to the west of Gensokyo. She also noted that knowing Cyrillic would be, for all intents and purposes, useless to her.
Aoi's response was simply to shrug her mother off and get back to reading. Why did fun have to be useful in any way to her?
"And on that note, I peeked in on your little writing session. I don't see why you want those cards back so badly - you couldn't come up with a single idea, could you?"
The old rivalry between Akai and Aoi had died down for a while, but as they hit their teens it came back at full force. Aoi had learned ways to gain the upper hand without resorting to violence - her sister may have been the stronger one, but she could win in a contest of wits any day of the week. She had her own spellcards as bookmarks, and unlike Akai's they actually had incantations and names, while hers were simply blank pieces of paper.
"Uh, well, that's because you've got the whole reading theme to work with. I'm just having trouble finding a niche, that's all?"
"Don't worry, I understand. It must be so difficult finding poetic ways to say 'Fire A Thousand Lasers Of Red Death'."
"W-Well...dammit, just shut up and get back to that book of yours."
Aoi didn't even lift her head from beneath the sheets, smiling as she heard Akai grit her teeth. She decided to keep note of Kaiser Akai, though she'd have to be careful - if she ever figured out that she was basically being called a man there would probably be a lot of pain involved.
This was all an ordinary enough night for the Yakumo children, though. A little teasing, some nasty words being flung around, but ultimately they did care about each other deep down. They'd just never been in a position where they'd had to depend on each other rather than stand on their own.
A fact that would change in the next 24 hours, as a cry from the room next door pulled them away from their petty disputes. It was the cry of a mother, screaming for a lost child.
But the name being called didn't belong to any of them.
"CHEEEEEEEEEEEEN!"
---
This story seems to have undergone what I've termed as Sango Syndrome - the new members of the Yakumo family have made the jump from one-shot gimmick into full blown OCs. -_-
I may end up giving it its own topic starting from the next entry. Assuming I can find a semi-decent name, anyway...
-
Oh snap. I sense impending drama.
-
I'm now desperate for four puppies named Akai, Aoi, Midori and Kiro.
-
sana this took me like 3 times longer than I expected it to BE GRATEFUL >:|
-----
"IT'S THE BATTLE OF THE CENTURY!" yelled a voice from who-knows-where as the two warriors squared up. One, a lean-looking Japanese man in a plain white gi, the determination of a true fighter burning in his eyes; the other, the Goliath to his David, a massive man in a simple pair of shorts, revealing the gaping scar running across the full length of his chest. The mark continued upwards until it reached his eye, where an ominous black eyepatch was enough to show that he had taken more than his fair share of hits.
"Ryu..." the giant muttered, in a tone that had once held hatred but now carried a hint of respect. The two looked each other straight in the eye, the fight beginning mentally before either of them had even moved. Neither of them budged an inch, until finally the Japanese man let out a simple response.
"Let's go, Sagat!"
Ryu took on a fighting stance, his traditional art of Ansatsuken. Sagat followed suit, bending his elbows and knees to take on a textbook stance of Muay Thai. A martial art that made no effort to be flashy or intricate, but focused entirely on efficiency and brutality. None had matched his strength, and the title 'Emperor of Muay Thai' was one none would claim was undeserved.
Then came the first time he had fought with Ryu, and the day he earned this scar across his chest. But those were days long gone, and despite his injury Sagat remained one of the strongest men in the world. Today brought him another chance to settle the old score, and prove that the Emperor of Muay Thai was still the strongest man in the world.
"FIGHT!"
The announcer's voice was drowned out by the screaming crowd that followed it. Immediately the two warriors started their battle, unleashing their attacks simultaneously.
"Hadoken!"
"Tiger Shot!"
Both men held their hands in front of them, producing intense bursts of flame in a manner many would consider physically impossible. The projectiles flew across the arena, colliding with one another in a fantastic explosion. Neither man blinked, as Ryu saw the opening to rush at his opponent. He closed the distance between them in a matter of seconds, raising his hand to send slamming into Sagat's side.
Not fast enough!
Sagat recovered from his attack before Ryu could fully capitalise, bringing his arm down to strike his vulnerable opponent. He bent his knees further still, pushing himself into the air to add even more force to his strike.
"Tiger Uppercut!"
Sagat leapt into the air, expecting his fist to collide dramatically with Ryu's chin. Only after he had left the ground did he realise that his opponent's attack had been a dramatic feint, and he had fallen for it completely.
"Kh-!"
Sagat grit his teeth, waiting to hit the floor in expectation of a punishing combo when he landed. An unusual sound from above him, however caught his attention.
"What the-?!"
Right above him a strange gap had opened up in the air, and there was nothing he could do to stop his ascent. His hand entered the gap, and the crowd gasped as they saw that nothing emerged from the other side. Then it consumed his head, his chest, his legs, until in a matter of seconds the Emperor of Muay Thai had vanished completely.
A thousand shocked eyes watched idly as the gap closed itself, leaving Ryu confused but ultimately victorious.
---
The landing had been no challenge for Sagat, at least. He had practiced the Tiger Uppercut thousands of times over the years, to the point where positioning himself for a safe landing was second-nature. His feet collided with a different surface than what he'd been standing on before - wooden planks, giving off a painful creak as they struggled to hold his colossal figure.
This was not the arena. This wasn't even Thailand anymore. All he could see at his sides were clouds, almost as if this ship - Was it a ship? Was that even possible? - were flying in the air without any sort of engine.
Sagat rubbed at his temples. He had seen many amazing things in his time as a street fighter. He'd seen men shoot fire from their hands. He'd seen a morbidly obese man prancing around like a ten year old on a sugar high. He'd even seen a blonde-haired American Lieutenant be killed off three times at three different tournaments and STILL be considered alive by many of his fans. But this was something that even he had trouble believing.
"Hey. Are you the tiger guy?"
Another voice from behind him. It was no-one from the arena, and the voice sounded distinctly feminine. Turning around, Sagat found himself stunned by several things at once - the cold stare coming from the girl's red eyes, the large grey mouse ears sticking out of her head, and the matching tail that seemed to be holding a basket unaided. Sagat had to look right down to see any of this - the girl was barely at his chest, but she looked up at him without a hint of fear.
"...Yeah, looks like she got the right guy."
"Of course I did. You would doubt me~?"
An older voice this time, belonging to a companion of the mouse girl. A young woman in a simple violet dress, carrying a parasol (needlessly, given that the sun was caught behind the clouds at the moment) and brushing aside a few strands of blonde hair to look him head on.
"I must apologise for the inconvenience, but your little bout was my best opening to bring you here. Call me Yukari, by the way. I won't bother you with the long-winded explanations, but in short I wanted to prepare something of a dream match, and you're one of the proud contenders!"
Dream match, hm? It was a term Sagat had heard more than once before, when he entered tournaments against opponents who were assigned to other fighting networks (the infamous KapuKomu vs. Esenkei tournament, for example), but they'd never involved him being sent through what he now assumed had to be some sort of dimensional gateway. The woman continued talking, apparently not that concerned about whether Sagat was actually listening.
"It won't be anything too convoluted - one match, winner takes all, and if you win I'll send you back home with a nice little nest egg for your efforts. Sound fair?"
The thought of refusal never so much as crossed Sagat's mind. For one, he didn't have a choice in the matter - this woman had presumably brought him here, so she was also the only one who could take him back. He nodded.
"Tell my opponent that they have one chance to reconsider."
The woman with the parasol grinned.
"Ohoho~. Confident, are we? Well, I'm afraid you might be in for something of a surprise, considering fights here don't work quite like they do in your world..."
She looked behind her, to a figure standing in the distance.
"Do you hear that, Shou?! He says he's giving you a chance to surrender!"
She stepped to the side, giving Sagat a clear sight of his opponent for the first time. Immediately his eyes focused on the most important features - the eyes. More than anything, he was looking for the soul of a warrior staring back at him - if he could not find even that, there would be no challenge in this contest at all.
Luckily for him, his request was answered more than abundantly, as a pair of confident blonde eyes looked back at him with an anger that was almost feral.
"Heh. Not a chance, old lady."
With his first inspection returning satisfactory results, Sagat took a chance to look at his opponent in more detail. She was female, much to his surprise, dressed in an intricate red robe with tiger stripes running along the bottom, One hand held a dangerous looking spear - likely no threat to him, though, considering that he'd fought foes with blades and claws before - and in the other sat what seemed to be a jewelled pagoda, glowing with a supernatural light. Her hair was blonde with black stripes running through it, and a single fang seemed to be sticking out from her upper lip.
He was starting to understand why he in particular had been chosen for this fight.
"Alright, then. You two seem ready, so I'll act as referree. Just let me get look at these cards I put together for the occasion..."
Yukari took out a small set of cards, reading over their contents intently. She took a deep breath as she memorised them, before finally throwing the whole set to the side and shouting at the top of her lungs.
"THIS IS GONNA BE A MATCH TO REMEMBER! FIGHT!"
Sagat didn't hesitate for an instant, giving his opponent no mercy. She may not have been Ryu, but she was a warrior, and so was well deserving of his respect.
"Tiger Shot!"
Another attack emerging from his hands, and flying across the ship towards its target with fiery intensity. Shou didn't move until the last moment, tilting her body just far enough to the side to dodge. Her eyes registered boredom.
"Is that it?"
Sagat grit his teeth. He had faced opponents who could brush off his attacks before, but it had been a while since he'd been confronted by one so confident in their own abilities.
"Guess it's my turn, then."
Sagat expected Shou to attack with her spear, but instead she raised her pagoda into the air, closing her eyes in focus. Sagat kept his distance, ready to repel any attack she made with another Tiger Shot if necessary.
With an impressive flash, the pagoda let out a stream of laser-like projectiles. Sagat flinched, but eased himself as he realised that the attack had missed completely. These lasers would miss him entirely-
Or so he thought until they turned at the very last second.
"Gh-!"
Sagat was barely able to avoid getting impaled on one of Shou's attacks, feeling a burning along his side to remind him he hadn't cleared the attack entirely.
"THEY STARTED OFF WITH A SNEAKY SURPRISE ATTACK AT THE START OF THE ROUND!"
Yukari shouted at the top of her lungs again. Sagat was really getting tired of her already, but given that she was his only way home it was an irritation he was going to have to live with. Shou smirked.
"I'm impressed. Most humans would have never reacted to that attack in time."
Sagat raised his hand from the wound on his side, returning his opponent's proud glare. He couldn't be seen afraid of his opponent, or the battle would be lost instantly.
"I am no mere human, I am the Emperor of Muay Thai! Thousands have fallen to my power, and you shall be next!"
"Really? Guess I'll make you test that theory, then."
They looked at one another with both respect and determination, ready for the next exchange to begin. For a second, neither moved.
"Haaa-!"
Sagat darted across the deck of the ship with all the speed he had. He was well aware that there was nothing he could do about that attack of hers, so the only option was to make sure she couldn't use it. Immediately she started to charge the pagoda again, but this time she was too slow as Sagat leapt from the deck with incredible velocity.
"Tiger Knee!"
Shou was too busy charging to have a chance to avoid the attack. Sagat's knees connected cleanly with her chest, knocking the breath out of her and sending her crashing into the wall.
"THAT'S WHAT WE LIKE TO CALL BIG DAMAGE!"
If only he could attack Yukari rather than Shou, he would be so much more satisfied, but such was life. He was not entirely surprised when his opponent rose back to her feet, wincing but still perfectly capable of fighting.
"Heh. I guess you really are tougher than you look."
The pair grinned at each other. This was the thrill of battle, the joy in matching wits with another fighter, and both of them were embracing it.
"All out for this next attack, then?"
Sagat chuckled.
"So you were holding back as well."
"YOU CAN FEEL THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM AS THE-"
""Shut up!""
Both competitors shouted at Yukari in unison, finally convincing the announcer to be quiet. Their faces shifted from irritation, to relief, and finally to focusing on battle.
Shou moved faster than Sagat could hope to stop, emerging at the other side of the deck within a second. She raised a single hand in the air, holding a piece of paper in her hand.
"Light Sign [Absolute Justice]!"
Immediately the pagoda let off an even brighter light than before, exploding into a hundred different lasers, all of which immediately turned on Sagat.
"Gah-!"
There was only one thing for it at this rate. He had to gamble on whether it was possible for these lasers to be deflected, and then use the opening to finish her in one blow. This was it, the entire fight depended on this-!
He charged forward, into the barrage of lasers. Behind him, he could make out the mouse girl giving her ally words of encouragement.
"LET'S GO, SHOU!"
The lasers closed in on him. Instinct alone guided his hand, slamming each laser off into the distance. Behind him two voices called out in shock and awe as Shou's attack was parried with nigh-impossible precision.
"W-What?!"
Shou was caught in place for the duration of the attack, but Sagat continued to charge in the face of impossible odds. Again and again the lasers came for him, and every single one was deflected. The Emperor winced as his arms ached, but his fighting spirit was enough for him to cope with any injury.
Now!
The last laser was knocked to the side. Finally, he had his opening. This next attack was going to use everything he had!
"TIGER..."
He curled his arms in, tensing his body as far as he could. Then, in an instant, a knee flew forward and caught Shou in the jaw.
"...DESTRUCTION!"
The tiger youkai was sent flying into the air by the impact, stunned and unable to stop the followup. A second attack - a fierce uppercut - sent her body back into the air.
"N-No way..."
She could barely utter her surprise before the final blow hit. A second uppercut, but this time Sagat's hand was aflame as if it had fused with one of his own Tiger Shots. He sent Shou a clean ten feet in the air, following her every step of the way with his burning hand.
The world exploded into a sea of colours as Shou passed out.
"I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CRITICS SAY, VIOLENCE IS A BEAUUUUUUUUTIFUL THING!"
There was something strangely satisfying about Yukari's last words, Sagat thought as he landed. Shou obviously hit the ground much harder than he did, but he could make out ragged breaths coming from her regardless. He expected no less from such a worthy opponent.
"SAGAT WINS!"
The giant flexed his muscles one last time with a pair of elbow swings, before crossing his arms in a majestic stance.
"You see now why they call me the King!"
---
He was unsatisfied.
There had been no fight. His opponent had disappeared into nothingness, so what point was there in staying? He would learn nothing from the turmoil that followed.
Ryu returned to his endless journey, travelling the world to strengthen his skills. He felt more at home here than he ever had in a home, and the solitude was enough to give him time to ponder.
At least, until he saw a familiar silhouette standing in the distance.
"Sagat...?!"
The man who had vanished from the arena a few hours ago had returned, apparently none the worse for wear. He smiled proudly as Ryu came into view.
"What happened? Are you alright?"
He could have explained it; he could have told the story of how that gap had led him into a mystical land where he fought a tiger given human form. But what point would there be in that?
"Would you refuse me a rematch depending on my answer?"
Ryu hesitated as Sagat's words rung true. A warrior is always a warrior, regardless of the trials life puts him through. Eventually, he understood, and his hands clenched into fists.
"I still have a lot to learn from you, it seems."
Sagat returned the favour, taking up his Muay Thai stance.
"I will be more than happy to be your teacher."
A moment of silence. A determined glare from both of them. And in the back of Sagat's head, a voice that refused to go away.
"LIVE AND LET DIE! FIGHT!"
-
What is this I don't even-
Seriously though, I'm still perplexed as to what inspired you to write this.
Sana requested it. :V
-
You know, mods adding comments to posts like that makes me think it's like some kind of disembodied supernatural voice speaking from somewhere next to the original poster.
<Sakana> Mods? Where? I just see Librarians around here~
So, anyway, hmm, a Street Fighter thing ...
Sagat is gapped into Gensokyo to fight Shou
*facepalm*
... and he wins by blocking each of her curvy-lasers
*facepalm x2 combo!*
<Roukan> It has been two months since this post was made, and only NOW do I get this reference. :V
... so, uh, did he get anything specific for winning besides satisfaction? Yukari seemed to imply he did ...
-
WHO LET THEM ENTER THE TOURNAMENT?!
Rou this is the bestest : D
-
Ohohoho this is awesome. Really awesome.
-
The story is unfinished. It is unlikely to be finished in time for the actual contest.
But screw it, I'm posting part 1 anyway.
-----
For all its supposed demonic power, Makai was a pretty bland place.
"Couldn't you have had the machine take us somewhere more interesting this time, Yumemi?"
"Don't talk like that! We've only just got here. I'm sure there'll be something interesting right around the corner."
Professor Yumemi Okazaki, the only human to hold a PhD in Danmakuology, trudged along Makai's blood-red plains, almost invisible as the colour of her clothing and hair blended in with it. Her assistant, Chiyuri, was reluctantly being dragged into this little escapade, watching as the horizon moved on to reveal yet more empty, red land.
"Look, are you sure you got the coordinates right? I thought you said this would take us right to Shinki's doorstep."
"Are you questioning my ability, Chiyuri?! Clearly you had a little too much to drink last night if you're can't even remember how good I am at this!"
"...But I stuck to the orange juice..."
The strawberry-coloured scientist ignored this last point, looking back and getting a nice glance of Chiyuri's legs. Yes, she was useful as an assistant as well, but this was 90% of the reason she didn't just use a computer instead. PCs didn't have long, slender, beautiful le-
"Ah!"
Distracted by those glorious thighs, Yumemi tripped over something caught in Makai's long path of red dirt. She picked herself up immediately, not realising her clothes were dirty as the colours blended in.
"See? We found something."
Chiyuri sighed, having seen the obstacle coming and letting go of Yumemi's hand in the nick of time. The pair looked down at the object protruding from the earth, with what seemed like a lid on it.
"It looks like..."
"Watch your words, Chiyuri. This is a momumental finding, a great moment for human science. Don't ruin it with a condescending description of-"
"...a giant space dumpster."
Silence.
"Just open it, Chiyuri."
The pair glared at one another, before eventually the sailor kneeled down and pulled the lid off the monumental dumpster of scientific goodness.
Immediately she regretted it, as it released an ominous red light, blinding the pair in an instant. By the time their eyes opened again, suddenly there were four ominous figures looking down on them: a mouse-girl wielding a pair of awkward-looking rods, a hooded figure accompanied by a pink cloud with a man's face on it, another sailor girl wielding around a giant anchor, and a monk with striped hair looking around awkwardly.
"...Um, guys? Anyone seen the pagoda? I'm sure I was carrying it when I got sealed away..."
The tiger-coloured monk looked around nervously, while the other three tried their best to look threatening to scare off the human explorers. Both of them, however, had focused their attention on the anchor-wielder, Murasa, with completely opposite emotions.
"Uwaah...your legs...they're so..."
"The hell do you think you're doing?! The sailor uniform was my gimmick, dammit! I'll sue you-"
"NAMUSAAAAAAAN!"
A voice roared from within the space dumpster, literally blowing Chiyuri and Yumemi away into the distance. The four servants who had emerged looked towards it, seeing their master finally emerge. She had been sealed away long ago for crimes against logic, and even now she flaunted the gradient hair that many had deemed the work of the devil.
"Good morning, Hijiri-sama. It's good to see your hair is as beautiful as ever."
Byakuren Hijiri stared at the hooded figure, shrugging.
"Not like I'm trying. It started as an effect from the lighting, and then it all went downhill from there. At least I didn't end up like Shou did."
Her eyes turned to the monk, still running around in a panic.
"Okay, seriously, I'm sure I had it. It was somewhere around here, I know it. Nazrin, do you-"
"No."
"Are you su-"
"Yes."
"But I-"
"No."
Shou paused for a moment, eventually falling to her knees and weeping quietly. Byakuren let out a deep sigh.
"I need some better servants. Really. Let's just start with the usual deeds."
"Head to the first dimension we can find, take it over, and rule like queens?"
"Yup."
"S-Sounds good, but can we wait until I find the-"
"No."
-----
"Say, Marisa. I've been wondering."
"What is it, Reimu?"
"You ever feel like something's...off about this place?"
"C'mon, Reimu. Nothing's unusual about Gensokyo High School. What, you think someone went and built this place for the sake of a plot device?"
"Well, sorta..."
"Maybe you oughta see Dr. Komeiji sometime, Reimu. You're thinkin' too hard."
Existentialism wasn't a subject that typically passed around Gensokyo High (technically Gensokyo Academy for Girls, but that wasn't worth mentioning for obvious reasons), but apparently the young shrine maiden found it worth discussing as she made her way to her next class. There was something awkward about this place, about all her classmates, her teachers - they were people she could have sworn she'd beaten up at some point in the past, each and every one of them. Apparently, some mysteries would remain unsolved.
Marisa, her classmate and best friend, quickly pulled her away from that theory. She gave Reimu a playful shove, knocking her into a pair of queasy-looking girls standing at the wall.
"'Ey...whadday think yer...?"
The shorter of the two spoke up, nearly stabbing her companion with her demon like horns. She groaned a complaint out between sips from her gourd. Next to her, a taller student with a single horn kept a sake dish upright, with better balance than the rest of her body.
"Look 'ere, Suika. 'pparently Miss Red White thinks she can screw with us 'n' get away with it."
"Yeah, Yuugi. Just 'cause she's some Student Council Prez...gets to wear that special uniform with the sleeves...ya think we wanna see yer pits or somethin'? I'ma show you how...how..."
Suika looked set to start an attack, but her fist found the floor as her knees buckled. Reimu had long since stepped backwards anyway, glaring at Marisa.
"What? You can't deny laughing at those two isn't funny."
"Maybe, but not while I'm on the job."
Reimu muttered beneath her breath to ensure her words didn't make it anywhere other than Marisa's ears. Truth be told, she was President mainly because she had the highest grades in the year, as always. She had never studied - hell, she hated studying - but somehow she miraculously scored perfect results in every exam. There was an entire council of teachers dedicated to figuring out how Reimu was cheating, but so far they'd turned up nothing. They made the same efforts to determine how Marisa achieved such high scores, but they were roughly as successful.
Marisa was a cheater. Reimu wasn't.
"Ahaha. You fell, Suika."
Yuugi laughed at her fallen comrade, her eyes slightly glazed over. Suika took this moment to pass out on the floor, her gourd somehow standing straight upwards to avoid spilling. The two oni were the school's best-known delinquents, mainly for their ability to beat the living daylights out of any student or teacher who screwed with them. At least, assuming their drinks had been in the single digits that day, otherwise they were more or less useless wrecks. Reimu would laugh at their plight if she could, but duty and all.
"Anyway. Quit your yappin' and let's just get to class. Y'know Professor Kamishirasawa hates it when you show up late."
"How should I know? You're the one with first-hand knowledge of her penalties."
"Those horns hurt, okay? I had to bandage up my forehead for a week."
Shifting the subject to the teachers, Reimu put aside her paranoid concerns. She had a feeling, though, that something about today was unusual...like a great evil had emerged from somewhere, and she would have to fight it along with a group of other girls in a giant robot.
She made a mental note to stop sharing Marisa's mushrooms at lunch.
-----
"Oh, goddammit. That's another world record, kid. Are you screwing with us?"
Gensokyo High was a school of overachievers, and the swimteam was no exception. An official sat dumbfounded as he clicked the stopwatch, confirming that Nitori Kawashiro had shaved milliseconds off her breaststroke time yet again.
"Screwing with you? I've got no idea what you're talking about, sir. A record's a record, right?"
The kappa stuck her tongue out at him, causing his face to suddenly flash red. He scribbled something down on a notepad.
"...Your cheque will be in the mail in a few days. Now get back to class, Gym's over."
Nitori was all too happy to comply, pulling herself out of the pool and prancing with glee to the changing room. Of course she had been screwing with him - if she wanted she could have destroyed her time by seconds, but because she earned a nice cash bonus with every record broken she settled for barely outdoing herself over and over. That money would help to fund her research - or at least repair the damage she'd managed to do to the science lab last week. They'd been nagging her about that for a while, but she insisted that if you didn't make your laboratory blastproof then it deserved to get torn apart.
Nitori didn't bother drying herself - she'd put money into creating a waterproof school uniform which she just wore over the swimsuit. Besides the occasional droplet of water from her hair, there was nothing to worry about. In a matter of minutes she was already in the corridor again, walking to her next class.
Art. Gah.
Whoever said that science was an art was a blatant liar. Nitori was hardly the next Leonardo, to be frank - anything beyond basic geometry was just about beyond her. She slumped toward the class, only propelled by the promise of money in the next few days. Behind her, there was a squeaking noise.
A flash filled the corridor from right behind Nitori. Or rather, right under her.
"This is, like, such a sweet shot! I've gotta make page 3 for sure!"
That accent. That angle. That boasting. It had to be-
"DAMMIT, HATATE!"
The tengu had risen to her feet again by now, having slid flawlessly between Nitori's legs and taken a clear shot of the swimsuit beneath. Immediately she started on the only logical option - running like hell.
"H-Hey, wait! You'd better not publish that! Don't you need consent for publication nowadays?!"
"Like, no-one pays attention to those rules anymore! And I'm hardly gonna let some filthy rules get in the way of beating out Shameimaru!"
Hatate was the Vice-President of the Journalism club, and helped in producing the school's monthly paper, the Bunbunmaru. Although 'paper' was perhaps too generous a term for it, considering that it was mostly a dispenser for various embarrassing photos that made the club a lot of 'friends'. Hatate wasn't the only journalist, though - the president, Aya Shameimaru, was better known and more feared, and in the last few months the VP had upped the ante in an effort to take control of the paper.
No-one was really grateful for it, to say the least.
"Get back here! You aren't getting away with-"
Actually, she was. Journalism required two key skills - the ability to take good photographs, and the ability to run really, really quickly. Hatate was blessed with both of these, and Nitori quickly found herself trailing behind.
"Heheh...this is gonna be a great scoop. Forget page 3, this is gonna be a headliner for sure! 'Swim Captain Kawashiro Mixes Business With Pleasure'! Ooh, I can smell the inches already!"
Hatate drifted off into her own little world, picturing Aya's story as a tiny paragraph somewhere around page 12. The rest of it was her, all her, digging up the dirt on every misgiving of every student there was. They'd fear her, all of them, and the name Hatate Himekaidou would be one no-one laughed at ever again-
"Eh?"
Something caught her by the foot. By the time Hatate was conscious enough to realise what had happened, she had already slammed into the floor. The camera slid along the floor, lost and crushed among the crowd. Hatate's heart tore itself apart at the sight.
"Oops, sorry~. Are you hurt?"
A hand came down to help her up, its owner being a grey-haired girl with a smile that could make a heart melt. That, or reintroduce you with what you'd eaten an hour ago, depending on your resistance to moe. A purple, eye-like decoration hung from her chest, clenched shut. Hatate grit her teeth.
Of course. Who else is going to stop me other than freakin' Komeiji?
Koishi Komeiji was...an odd student, to say the least. Everyone knew her, recognised her, but at the same time no-one was sure what she actually did. She never seemed to take classes, and she wasn't at any clubs either, but everyone had experienced walking past her in the hallway at least once. There was something about her that hung in the mind, somewhere in the subconscious. She had a sister who was the school counsellor, but even SHE didn't seem to know anything about Koishi.
She was the sworn enemy of the journalism club. Without fail, when either Aya or Hatate were fleeing from the scene of their worst heists, she would be there, and she would somehow ruin the plan singlehandedly. A foot conveniently held out, a floor uncleaned leading to a trip-up, an accidental nudge into a dumpster. And when the time came to extract vengeance and embarrass Koishi, the effort failed completely - no matter how risque or shameful the photos they took of her, Koishi still strolled around with the same carefree smile.
Why did she do these things, when she had no idea what had happened or who was coming? Because it somehow felt right.
Hatate slapped away Koishi's hand, her face twisted into an almost unnatural expression of rage.
"Look, girl. You're, like, really getting on my nerves now. I'm not an idiot, I know you're going outta your way to screw me over. Aya hired you, didn't she?"
Koishi tilted her head, puzzled. Behind them, Nitori finally caught up, and rejoiced at the sight of the destroyed camera.
"Aya? You mean the other newspaper girl? I think she said the same thing about you, actually, but you're both wrong. Sorry, I guess I'm just unlucky~."
"Unlucky?! Don't give me that shi-"
The bell cut Hatate's profanity off, and also brought the argument to an untimely end. Hatate's eyes turned to her watch.
"Huh? That time already?! Crap, I've got 2 minutes to make it to Calligraphy with Professor Hieda! We'll settle this later, Komeiji!"
Hatate sprinted down the corridor, quickly disappearing into the crowd. Koishi simply stayed where she was, glancing at the swarm of students and smiling to herself.
"She's a nice girl, I know it. I get the feeling we'll have to work together sooner than she thinks~"
-----
"Yukari-sama."
A severe voice echoed through the chamber.
"Eh...wuzzit, Ran? 'm sleeping..."
"It is about Makai. Hijiri has escaped, and she plans to attack Gensokyo."
Silence.
"So?"
"Yukari-sama, shouldn't you just use your power to get rid of her again? Seal her away, send her back to Makai, something like that. Aren't you omnipotent?"
"Eh...too tired. Too much work."
"B-But...what do we do about her?"
"Just get some kids together to do it. We'll give 'em that...that fancy robot thingy we've been saving up."
"...You want me to bring together five random teenagers, give them magical powers, and then give them control of the Hisoutensoku? Yukari-sama, perhaps you need to think this o-"
"Not just any teenagers, Ran."
Silence. This time, of the dramatic flavour.
"Recruit a team of teenagers with attitude."
-
Jesus fuck.
This was bound to happen.
-
Ahahaha what. XD
-
Oh my... for the love of Yukari!(no pun intended) This is crazy! Yukari is officially even more awesome then she already is!
-
Oh god can't wait for the ending of this man, so far it's freaking awesome. Now I wonder who's gonna be the green ranger :3
-
There are so many ways this can go.
And so many of them awesome.
(So what, will the rangers be Reimu, Suika, Nitori, Hatate, and Koishi? Sounds like a team...)
-
<@Roukan> Oh damn.
<@Roukan> I had intentions to make this romancy
<@Roukan> But suddenly I'm writing Medicine as totally psycho, and enjoying it.
Yeah. Consider yourself warned.
-----
The flowers were blooming well today.
The smell of the lilies wafted through the air, carrying a slightly bitter scent. It was an odour most wouldn't have expected from them - it was a hint too threatening, too nauseating. Most who strayed from their path and found their way to the foot of this hill would quickly find themselves turning back, feeling like there was something dangerous in the flower fields, something wrong.
The human body had instinctively learned to detect poison, even if the fleeing human found himself unable to put his fear into words.
The first sign a foolhardy adventurer would have felt as he walked inward among the flowers was the feeling of numbness running across his entire body, his nerves slowly paralysed by the spores released into the air. Then his body would grow heavy, almost unbearably, to the point where it became a challenge to maintain a walking pace. Finally, his leaden hand would clutch at his throat, as the paralysis gripped his lungs and left him choking helplessly on the flower-laden soil.
As if to spite the dying traveller, a shadow would loom over him in his final moments. It always belonged to the same young girl with short blonde hair, tied up in an ornate red ribbon. Her light blue eyes would stare down at the body with both curiosity and elation.
"Look, Su-san. The flowers have cut this human's strings."
An arm would reach down to jab at the sides of the choking man. Something was wrong with her, so thoroughly, completely wrong that even with all his nerves frozen he would be able to feel the chill run down his spine.
It would become clear by the time he got a proper view of her arm. The joint at the elbow, revealing a gaping hole where there should have been flesh, and showing that the entire arm was held together by a simple ball-and-socket.
That would almost inevitably be his last realisation, as at last his body reached its limit and he passed into unconsciousness. The doll-girl would sit over his body for a while longer, perhaps prodding at him occasionally. After a few minutes without a response, she would grow tired of the corpse and return to her normal hobby of strolling the flower fields.
They started off as grown men, with personalities and hopes and dreams. By the time they came to Medicine Melancholy, they may as well have been dead parrots.
-----
Another one. The same as the rest. The same look of horror in his eyes, the same hand clasped around his neck, the same limp and lifeless muscles. Medicine frowned - these humans weren't even putting up a fight.
It was satisfying to see a human die by her hand, true, but she wished that one of them would show a little more oomph one of these days. Not that she was lonely or anything - why would she be lonely? She was a powerful youkai, wasn't she? Strong people didn't need friends. Besides, people who came close to her had a strange habit of dying.
"And I have Su-san, don't I? Su-san, you like me, don't you?"
She spoke to a tiny puppet fluttering at her side, looking almost identical to her if several magnitudes smaller. Its head gave Medicine a tiny nod. Su-san always seemed to give Medicine exactly the response she wanted to hear. It was strange, but she saw no reason to it any thought.
She strolled along the flowers that dotted this unmarked hill, taking care not to slip over the occasional body. In time, the soil would take them, and the flowers would feast on the valuable nutrients held in their bodies. Honestly, humans were more useful as food for the flowers than they could ever be while they were alive.
The memories of her time before she awakened here were rare and unclear. She recalled sitting on a desk as an elderly man prepared a dress beside her. Its black and red tints contrasted in a way that would have caught her eye if only she could turn her head.
The next memory was further on. The man held her hands up, through strings she could do nothing to control. Her body was at his mercy, and she performed at his will towards the masses. That was when she had learned her name, Medicine Melancholy - a name she hated, but which she could do nothing to complain about. She remembered the faces of a dozen smiling children, laughing at her with teasing, hateful eyes. She wanted to hurt those children with every ounce of her heart, but she was still a slave to the strings.
Another fragment. The puppeteer was resting in bed. His breathing was heavy, and his face cold. Medicine watched him suffer from the desk with something resembling a smile on her face. Not that he would have noticed - after all, she had been built to smile. If she could, she would have taken his pillow and smothered him with it,
The last. The old man's son had claimed the house, and found some old doll that had apparently been his prized possession. That knowledge did nothing to stop him from hauling Medicine out of the house and leading her into the distance, finally laying her to rest in a field of flowers.
There were more fragments following that, but they all looked the same. Each of them were simply memories of lying face down, battered by the wind and rain and cold. She couldn't see with her eyes so close to the ground. Her world was nothing more than a wall of black that she could not penetrate or in any way change. For days, weeks, months, years, that was her world.
She had all the time she needed to think. For years, her hatred towards the race that had built her only to throw her away lingered, growing more and more venomous as the world moved on above her. She entertained herself with fantasies of vengeance - lucid dreams of giving that elderly bastard a taste of his own medicine. How she would adore the chance to see him hang powerless, bending to her will rather than the other way around. Would it be more pleasurable to see the terror run across his face, or torture him with a body that could not even show expression? She had more than enough time to fully play out both scenarios in her mind, and both of them were joyous.
Then her attention turned to the children, the little runts who had laughed at her plight. She had a special plan for them - she would kill each of them silently, and dangle the child's cold, smiling body in front of his mother's door. Strange how a doll was hilarious in that regard, but when a human was involved it was suddenly an atrocity. Medicine was disgusted by that.
But then, why stop there? There was an entire village of these humans, wasn't there? A whole city full of ungrateful, sadistic bastards who revelled in her powerlessness. It was a thought that initially infuriated her, but she soon realised that there was another way to view the fact - that gave her a full village of humans that she could punish. She gave them names, stories, lives, dreams and goals. She created an entire community in her mind, a job which took her no small amount of effort, but it finally paid off when at last she started killing the village's people off in a variety of ironic ways. Of course, she was the killer every time - she had created these people, after all, so it was only fair that she destroyed them.
There may have been a twinge of regret at one point near the beginning. Maybe they had been laughing with her, not at her. Maybe as a doll, it should have been her dream to please people, to make them smile. She was essentially immortal as long as the humans preserved her, while their bodies of flesh and bone would eventually wither and die. Was it not honourable to at least allow them to be happy in their short, fleeting, meaningless lives?
That thought was quickly discarded. They deserved no pity, no less from her, who had been brought up by them and thrown away when she was no longer needed. If she had been a girl, a human girl, the death of her 'father' would have incited a wave of saddened sighs, pats on the back and murmurs of 'you poor thing'. Someone would have taken her in out of the goodness of their heart and worked to give her a home. That was what humanity did - beyond greed and personal interest, there was a vital desire to help your fellow man and let him prosper.
Sadly, Medicine was not human. She had never been. She was a doll, and to humans a doll without her puppeteer was a worthless piece of junk that deserved to be forgotten. She was too old to be remembered, and too far from the village to be found. She had heard a youkai or two fly past once, but they saw no interest in a discarded doll either.
How was this fair? Why were dolls beneath the rest of society? Was there no human, no youkai, no creature in this land that had the kindness to look upon a doll and see her as an equal? It was a disgrace, a sham, and outrage! The dolls of Gensokyo were due more than they received! One day they would rise up, stand as one and take their revenge on the humans who had dared to treat them as toys! The roles would be reversed at last, and the humans would bow to their every beck and call! No mercy, no release, just an endless existence of servitude and slavery! And when they grew old and frail - why hold on to them? Just throw them away to rot and die!
The first sign that she had changed was when she heard laughter resounding through the flower fields. It was shrill, manic laughter, the sort that could not possibly have belonged to someone of sound mind. It puzzled her for a moment, wondering if there was perhaps a joke she had missed.
She soon realised that it was her who had been laughing.
Lifting her head upwards, out of the darkness that had been her world, Medicine finally returned to the Gensokyo that everyone else knew. The flowers were different now; tinted with a light shade of violet, as if her anger had seeped into the soil and infected them with malice. She found it beautiful.
Growing used to manual control had been difficult. More than once, Medicine had tripped on an unseen root and brought her entire body crashing to the floor. There was no pain, but occasionally an arm would come dislocated with a ghastly pop. It took a few minutes of difficult shuffling to lock it back into place in her shoulder, but there was no lasting damage like there should have been. Perhaps she was more than a doll now - maybe her time in an unwilling limbo had given her the will to stand.
It was a short while afterwards when she found the tiny doll, fluttering amidst the flowers and sniffing at them. She ignored the toxic spores that they were releasing, breathing in the scent like it was the most heavenly smell in all of Gensokyo. Immediately, Medicine knew she had found a friend.
She loved the lilies of the valley. The suzuran. So Medicine would call her Su-san, she decided. She asked the doll what she thought of it, and Su-san offered no objection.
As she became more and more aware of her consciousness, Medicine grew to realise that there was something very different about her. Something had grown inside her in the time she had been trapped, built up by her growing hatred for the humans who had abandoned her. The venom that had formed in her heart had grown literal, and she realised that in her body flowed every poison and toxin that had ever been discovered, not to mention several thought so dangerous they had been all but destroyed.
There were no words that could fully contain her joy at this realisation. Immediately, her focus became training herself, building her power so that the poisons that manifested within her grew stronger and bent entirely to her will. She would test her new-found powers on whatever animals were foolhardy enough to swoop near the hill, just out of reach of the flowers' spores. Initially, she could only clip the wings of a passing crow, but as time passed her prey became larger, and her poisonings more thorough.
When at last a foolhardy wanderer came to the foot of the hill, Medicine knew this was her one chance to truly test herself. He had wandered up to her, chivalry guiding him at the side of a young girl lost so far away from the human village. He had reached down, ready to pick her up and lead her back to her heartbroken mother.
His skin blistered where he touched her, and he leapt away in shock.
This was the moment she had been anticipating for years. The start of her plan to avenge the dolls that humans had heartlessly abandoned, and the beginning of an era where they would be given the rights they deserved. But before that, the criminals needed to be taken care of. Medicine had already performed the judgement, and the sentencing.
All that remained was the execution.
"What's the matter? Don't you want to play with me?"
The wanderer's eyes gaped open as his entire body trembled. He made to run, but with a single swing of Medicine's hand his legs buckled beneath him. He willed them to move, but no amount of will could counteract the venoms flooding his veins. His arms tried to pull him forward in vain, but there was no way for him to even hope of escaping his attacker. Medicine walked alongside him, smiling all the while with Su-san fluttering at her side.
"It hurts, doesn't it? The feeling of being alone without a soul to help you."
She saw the tears in his eyes, the murmured pleas for mercy escaping his mouth. It was every bit as fantastic as she had always dreamed, and she stepped on the man's back with a mighty thump. His skin turned black where her foot landed, and the blotch spread rapidly across his back and deeper into the flesh. The whispered words became desperate cries as the poison struck his nerves, filling his entire body with unbearable pain. He flailed pathetically beneath Medicine's foot, too weak now to even overcome a child of her stature.
"I went through this experience for years on end, and humans like you are crying for mercy in seconds? Pathetic."
She deliberately chose a poison with poor lethality, letting this human experience absolute agony until the point where he begged her for death. Even then she denied him it, letting the torture continue for as long as his body could withstand, until at last his brain surrendered to the nightmare and shut down of its own free will.
Medicine had frowned at that. It had been a fantastic experience, but it was far too short. No matter - she would have an entire city of villagers to expend her anger on in due time. She was not a fool, though - they would defend themselves, and as powerful as she was she could not defeat them alone. Whispers of a legendary warrior called 'the shrine maiden' also appeared in the fragments of her memory, so that was another foe to be prepared for.
So she would build an army first. The dolls of Gensokyo would gather here, the only of Gensokyo's creatures to be immune to her poison. They would unite under one banner, and when their army was full and prepared they would storm the village with all their might. There would be blood, and screams, and death in equal measure, and when the sun rose the next morning the human village would be a thing of the past.
Work towards that goal proved slow, unfortunately. The doll masses she had hoped for did not emerge, so her days were mostly spent honing her own skills with only Su-san for company. Her vengeance, it seemed, was still delayed until the day when her army was born.
Until then, she would satisfy herself with the fools who travelled onward into the lilies of the valley. Perhaps they all looked the same in death, but witnessing one of these filthy humans helpless would never grow old to her. This must have been how humans felt when they tortured insects, ripping the wings off while they were still alive and watching the creature writhe in agony.
Oh, if only she had a wing or two to tear away. It would be wonderful to watch this pile of filth squirm just a little more beneath her heel...
-----
I swear to god, some of this came to me disturbingly easily. :ohdear:
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Roukankan... What have you done?
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Roukankan... What have you done?
Something amazing.
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Roukankan... What have you done?
The work of a god... or a youkai with the ability to write incredible stories :3
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The nightmare fetishist inside me is grinning at this. Nice one, Rou.
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Ehh. *shrugs*
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Well this is quite the interesting story, now I wonder where Medicine will go next. :getdown:
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I just want to say that the Power rangers one was awesome.
And MM one was fascinating. Like bitter bitter tea.
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This topic is too depressing. It needs some love. And justice.
-----
When there weren?t youkai running around wrecking everything, Reimu Hakurei got bored pretty damn fast.
There was only so long a girl her age could sit around and sip tea before the concept of sitting around and doing nothing lost its appeal. Even if being made to clean up the mess of whatever magical abomination was having a temper tantrum this week needed her to work harder than she?d have liked to, she had to admit that it was a comfortable change from her daily routine of sitting next to the donation box and mentally rehearsing her speech for the next lucky donator to make her way up those stairs and offer her enough money to eat something that wasn?t rice.
This speech had gone unused for weeks now.
?Geez...what?s with people being so stingy nowadays??
She figured that it couldn?t have been that hard a trip for residents of the human village. A couple of hours trek, with possibly a few youkai blocking the way to the shrine for their own safety. Nothing that she wouldn?t be able to escort them through, and then they could add a tip to her donations as payment for her services. She could get an extra donation for helping people make their first donation - that was two donations who the price of one! Who could resist a great offer like that?
?...Wait.?
As Reimu spent a moment pondering the paradox she?d just invented, she was too distracted to hear the sound of tiny footsteps making their way out the stairway to the Hakurei shrine. Too small, in fact - they weren?t the footsteps of a soldier, and no human without some sort of combat training would have been able to make their way here. That left only one option - it was one of the various youkai who used the shrine as a meeting point, girls who Reimu had at some point beaten senseless (or at least as close to senseless as the spellcard rules would let her get nowadays). She didn?t keep track of her youkai visitors, mainly because they usually showed up to drink her tea and leave without so much as a coin in the donation box. Even if she had been paying attention to the noise, Reimu wouldn?t have been able to tell which of the super-powered little girls was coming to visit her today.
The sound of her humming her own dramatic music was something of a bigger hint.
...Oh, dammit. Not her.
Reimu sighed to herself, taking her cup of tea and rewarding herself with a larger swig than normal. It was the sort of fortitude she?d need to deal with this nutcase, that was for sure. She stood up, any pretense of welcoming her guest long since out the window, as the youkai made her way up the last few steps.
She?d never even intended to meet the girl known as Koishi Komeiji, and in retrospect it was a meeting she?d have preferred to avoid. Something in that girl?s mind had...warped, twisted. She wasn?t really sure how, or why, but at some point her rational thought processes had apparently flown into the distance to seek more fertile grounds. What had been left behind was a girl who was bright and cheerful, true, but whose grasp on reality was strained at best.
This was the only explanation for the fact that Koishi had made her way to the shrine by herself, wearing a bikini, in the middle of winter. Her eyes seemed distracted by the frozen vapours blowing out of her nose as she made her way under the shrine?s gate and walked towards the resident shrinemaiden without a hint of fear. This was her current psychosis - the idea that she was some sort of dolphin-riding superhero, fighting for love and justice and all that other nonsense. Besides the fact that beating troublemakers senseless was her job around here, Reimu found the girl?s endless energy - and lack of common sense - was more than enough to give her a headache.
?Greetings, armpit-flaunting damsel! Stand aside so that I may traverse your border!?
Reimu raised an eyebrow first of all at the ?armpit-flaunting? comment, wondering if Koishi dressed herself with her other two eyes as closed as the third one hanging off her chest. When she heard the girl?s second declaration, that irritation expanded into outright concern.
?OK, Komeiji. What are you playing at now??
Koishi?s dramatic posing loosened up as she realised that she had failed to swoon her target immediately. A hero she may have been, but she prided herself on her practicality and sociability as much as she did on her ability to smite evil-doers.
?Ah, Reimu-chan, there?s no need to worry. I?m just going out on a rescue mission. Surely you?ve heard about those prisons they?ve got out beyond the border, the ones where they trap poor, harmless innocents and turn them into exhibits for the world to see?! They?re evil places, run by bad, bad men!?
For a moment, Reimu?s resolve wavered. She wasn?t particularly knowledgeable about the world beyond Gensokyo, but if they had places like that she was a little more content with her life here. Maybe the maniac was actually on to a good cause for a change with this one.
?...Where?d you hear about these prisons, exactly??
?They were in one of Onee-chan?s books.?
Onee-chan? That would have been...Satori, the animal-loving recluse from underground. Reimu couldn?t think of a good reason for a pet-keeper like her to have books on imprisonment, but for all her gusto the one thing Koishi couldn?t do was tell a convincing lie. Now that she thought about it, the girl had a way of screwing with people?s subconscious...she had to know better than to walk around in public throwing around spells with reckless abandon, surely.
The shrinemaiden sighed to herself. The girl was probably doing something to her head right now, because this was absolutely insane.
?...Alright, fine. Just don?t get caught, okay? And you?d better be back by this evening, or I?ll have a friend haul you back by force.?
She held her gohei upright, and tapped it against the floor once. Behind her, the shrine?s gate grew a little lighter, and the air beneath it started to ripple. Koishi let out a little squeal of joy as she looked at the opening gateway, before running towards it at full speed.
?...Komeiji, wait.?
She skidded to a stop inches from the gateway, as Reimu piped up with one last question.
?These prisons, I?ve never heard about them. What are they called, exactly??
Koishi responded without a hint of awkwardness.
?Aquariums.?
By the time Reimu?s mind had processed the word, and realised what Koishi was actually trying to do, she had already disappeared into the gateway, making her way into the outside world.
Reimu felt sick.
?...Grandma.?
A violet gap tore through the air next to her, and a young woman?s head soon emerged from within.
?You?ve been letting your guard down, haven?t you, Reimu-chan? And I?ve told you a dozen times that I?m not your gra-?
?Just make sure she doesn?t kill anyone.?
Yukari allowed herself a little chuckle as she saw Reimu?s face growing more and more frustrated. That was all she gave herself before disappearing back into the gap, because if she stayed for a moment longer Reimu would have vented her frustration in the most violent way possible.
As the gap vanished, leaving only air in its wake, Reimu realised she was alone again. This time, though, she wasn?t patiently waiting for a visitor to offer her a donation.
She was offering the world beyond the border a silent prayer, and apologising for the monster she had unleashed upon them.
-----
?This place is strange.?
The outside world was even more unusual than she?d expected it to be, and it was a change that struck her as soon as she finished climbing down the shrine?s stairs. The first thing that had caught her eye was the lack of trees - in their place were huge grey buildings, looking as if they were scraping against the sky. There were strange lights on their sides, spelling out names and terms she?d never heard of before - things like ?karaoke? and ?arcade?. She definitely couldn?t fly now - not with so many potential watchtowers on every corner.
And the people - there were so many of them on this side of the border. The streets were full to the brim, and they seemed to go on further than her eyes could see. Around her were rushed salarymen, bored looking teenagers and gossiping housewives, all contesting for the right to walk forward without being crushed by the surrounding crowd. Koishi had no trouble in that regard - for some reason, people seemed to just move to their sides around her, for no reason other than gut instinct.
Good. Looks like the stories of Dolphin Rider Koishi have even made it outside of Gensokyo!
Everyone around her seemed almost tied up in their own clothing, covered by at least two or three layers. All she could make out of most people as she walked past was a pair of distracted eyes, focusing on their destination instead of the journey. She shrugged, not sure what all the fuss was about - she?d never had a problem with the cold. It was a mind-over-matter thing, and even as the snow melted on her bare skin she didn?t so much as shiver.
?...Shit. You seeing that??
She heard a voice to her right, and looking over she saw a trio of teenagers looking at her with various expressions of confusion and awe. One had already pulled out a small, metallic object with what looked like a camera attached to it, pointing it at her face.
?Hey! Beach chick! Do some poses, why don?t ya?!?
Koishi was puzzled at first by the man?s request, but she smiled when she figured it out. To think that she would have fans beyond the border as well! She couldn?t help but blush as she moved closer to the three, all watching her enamoured. She didn?t feel a need to say who she was - given the adoring faces they were wearing, they already knew.
She could only afford to spend a few minutes posing here, though. Those fish weren?t going to free themselves, after all. She offered the teenagers a fond farewell before making her way along the street once again.
They sat for a while, looking through the photos, drooling slightly. For a moment, they forgot the cold.
?...Uh...I?ve gotta go.?
?Y-Yeah, same here. I need to, uh...see if my bunk is working.?
?Well, um, that?s a coincidence. I have an appointment with...um. My psychologist.?
They gave each other hasty goodbyes, before each of them split up and ran to their own homes. They had some...personal business to take care of, so to speak.
As he was running home, the first teenager placed his cellphone carefully in his pocket. The last thing he wanted was to lose it now, before he could use its new contents to their full potential.
It would have worked, too, had a tiny gap not appeared in his pocket and swallowed away the cell. Maybe it had done no damage, but a satori walking around the streets of Japan was hardly something Yukari wanted people to be walking around with evidence of.
The trio would later accuse each other of stealing the phone, falling out and refusing to speak to each other ever again. So far, Koishi?s attempts to spread love and justice hadn?t had much effect.
-----
She?d received a couple of glances on the way here, but no-one had done more than look at her awkwardly. She figured they must have been Black Claw spies, looking to warn their leader that she was on her way. She?d take care of them later, but time was of the essence.
The first thing she was do was try and appeal to the masses. Give them the chance to repent and accept their mistakes, and let the little fishies free while Koishi was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. Failing that, she?d have to resort to a plain breakout - getting those prisoners back into the sea where they belonged.
After a good long walk - surrounded by nothing but city, a fact that stunned Koishi - the aquarium came into view. It was built into a pier on the coast, and the building?s front was decorated with a smiling dolphin, leaping happily out of the water.
Using cheerful imagery like that for a prison? ...You monsters.
Koishi?s conviction grew ever stronger at the sight of that, and her walking pace sped up to a hearty jog. There was a good attendance today, and a handy sign at her right told her that it was thanks to this being the day of the aquarium?s monthly whale performance.
Performance?! They have their prisoners perform?! OK, that?s just wrong!
The line moved along quickly, until at last Koishi was ready to be attended. The man at the counter flinched at the sight of her outfit, but eventually recovered.
?Ahem. Little girl, are you here with an adult??
Koishi tilted her head.
?Adult? What are you talking about? Do I look like the sort of girl who needs a sidekick??
He was taken aback by Koishi?s tone, but pressed on nonetheless.
?No, but...the law says we can?t let in children under the age of 16 unless they?re attended by a parent or guardian. Some of the pools are open, and if you fall in you might get into a lot of trouble. Sorry, you?ll have to come back with one of your parents.?
Parents? She hadn?t seen them in years, decades even. And she was probably older than he was, so he had no right to say she couldn?t enter.
...I get it. It?s a trick!
This was clearly some sort of clever plan the Black Claw had come up with to keep her out, refusing her entry under the guise of ?rules and regulations?. It was a cunning ploy, so ingenious that she?d almost missed it. Too bad for him that Dolphin Rider Koishi wasn?t that easy to fool.
?Well, if that?s how we?re playing it...?
Koishi looked at the path between her and the entrance. Nothing was stopping her other than a single bar, about chest-height, which wouldn?t move out of her way unless the attendant ordered it to.
However, nothing was stopping her from vaulting over it and running in unopposed.
?Iruka Jump!?
Koishi landed cleanly on her feet, leaving a stunned attendant to watch as she blitzed into the entrance. He grabbed a radio to his side, stuttering as he called for backup.
?C-Calling all guards! We have an unattended child loose in the aquarium! I repeat, we have an unattended child loose!?
A pair of men in black suits overheard the call for help on their earpieces, but they didn?t hear it soon enough to do anything about the girl dashing past them. Koishi ran down the hallway for dear life, sneaking between the smaller gaps in the crowd to gain the advantage. The guards may have been faster than her, but they couldn?t make it through the packed corridors like she could.
The only problem was the fact that they weren?t alone. With every corridor she passed, another pair of guards entered the fray. They were all over the place, and at this rate they?d surround her before she could even think of rescuing anyone. She had to admit, the Black Claw were pretty good when it came to protecting their facilities.
No worries. Those guys are wearing way too much to be any good in the water!
To her side, the corridor pulled outward, revealing an open pool about twenty feet deep. Koishi didn?t have any time to check what was inside, not with all those guards catching up on her. She cut a path through the customers looking over the pool and leapt in, diving under as soon as she dipped beneath the surface. She was really wishing she still had that ring now - breathing underwater would have been a really useful perk at a moment like this. She?d have to go without, though, and held her breath as she swam deeper and deeper down.
The fish in the tank looked over at her curiously. They probably hadn?t seen contact from an air-breather outside of feeding sessions, trapped in this aquatic prison with no hope of seeing the sea again. One or two brushed alongside her arm, and she could practically hear them crying out for help.
Don?t worry, guys! Dolphin Rider Koishi is here to free you from your enslavement! Never again will you be forced to perform at the Black Claw?s whim!
She needed a way out, though. She couldn?t surface, not with all the guards waiting up there, but at the same time she couldn?t stay down here and hold her breath forever. She glanced around the bottom of the pool, searching for another exit that wasn?t guarded.
Something poked her from behind.
?Gbl??
Turning around, Koishi saw a familiar face staring back at her - the ever-smiling face of a dolphin.
Whoa!? Sango-chan has a sister?!
The dolphin motioned towards the other side of the pool. Following its lead, Koishi could make out an indent in the pool wall, a little tunnel that led outwards. She had no idea where it went, but if this dolphin could be trusted it was an escape route. She gave it a quick thumbs-up before swimming towards it as fast as she could, just in case the guards found a way to chase her after all.
The tunnel continued for a good while, totally flooded, and started to branch out to her sides. It looked as if every tank in the aquarium was linked through these tunnels, so from here Koishi could get to anywhere she wanted. Right now, though, she needed a minute to catch her breath, and started following the helpfully given signs for the Dive Chamber.
After what felt like an eternity, Koishi saw the glass above her give way, and the water come to an end. She surfaced, gasping slightly as she realised she?d cut things a lot closer than she?d thought. How had she managed to lose that stupid ring?
?Hah, haah...I?m not gonna get anywhere like this.?
Pulling herself out, Koishi noticed that the room was unoccupied save for her. The walls were lined with various pieces of diving equipment, presumably used to let employees give the fishy prisoners their daily rations. Above the shelves, a clock kindly informed her that the whale performance was due to start in the next ten minutes. A map of the tunnels next to it showed that it would take place in the most distant tank, overlooking the sea off the edge of the pier.
Her eyes caught sight of a blank sign, and a pen lying next to it.
They glistened as an idea formed in the brain behind them.
?Looks like it?s time for me to put on my own show!?
-----
Twelve o?clock, on the dot. Time for the show to begin.
The missing girl was still a concern, but the guards were doing all they could to find her. For now, there was no point in causing unnecessary concern - not while there was still money to be made from this performance. They could hardly tell people to leave at the peak of their sale time, could they? The show must go on, as they said.
?Ladies and gentlemen, the show you?ve all been waiting for! Give it up for Oruka!?
An excited announcer made her declaration as the curtain around the tank unfolded, revealing its occupant. The children gathered here grabbed at the legs of their parents in unison as a heaving killer whale looked down on them with tired looking eyes. There were a variety of other, smaller fish in the tank alongside it, but everyone had their eyes on the largest of them all.
It swam around slowly, not seeming to be interested in the enawed spectators. Occasionally it would offer one a lazy glance, but otherwise its attention was focused on the distant window, looking out on the open sea. Everyone was too busy enjoying the sight of such a magnificent creature to bother thinking about its feelings - after all, fish were stupid, weren?t they?
The aquarium was smart, as well - they had positioned the glass panes of the tank so that the spectators could only see one half of the whale. They couldn?t see that its back fin had been kept in place with a massive chain, and that it could only stretch it so far before the chain stopped it from reaching the end of the tank. All it could do was lift its blowhole to the surface for air, but beyond that it was trapped. It had no chance of escaping on its own - not that the audience knew, or cared. They came to see a killer whale, and that was exactly what they were getting.
It took a knocking on the glass to distract their attention from it.
?Hey, is that a...??
?Holy crap. What is she-?
?Mommy, why is the lady swimming with the big fish? What if it eats her??
The audience broke out into frenzied murmurs as they realised there was something else in the tank as well. A young girl, maybe in her teens, had made her way inside, wearing the same diving gear the aquarium staff used. No-one stopped to think about how she got hold of it, or why she was using it, because everyone?s attention was on the sign she held aloft, saying in large plain letters ?SAVE THE WHALES!? She swam along the glass wall, waving cheerfully with one hand as she held the mural up in the other.
Immediately, a dozen guards stopped relaxing and started screaming.
?Dammit, how?d she get in there?! Someone stop her already!?
Koishi could make out their muffled shouts, and given that the crowd wasn?t joining together in a heartwarming attempt to care for the whale, plan A had failed. That left her plan B - namely, cut out the middle-man and free the whale herself. This time the aquarium staff were a little more prepared, and a pair of animal trainers dove down to try and apprehend her.
She swam towards the chain, seeing that it had already been stressed considerably. The bolts connecting it to the floor looked set to come off if she gave them a little twist. Sitting on the floor of the pool, she grabbed at the first bolt and started turning it with all her strength.
Halfway through, she felt a hand grab at her shoulder. On instinct alone she pulled her hand back and offered the trainer behind her an elbow in the face. She heard the sound of something cracking as he was knocked back, bursting back up to the surface. She forgot that humans could be a little squishy now and then, and people like Reimu-chan were the exception rather than the rule.
Using human shields to do your bidding...when I get my hands on the Black Claw creep responsible for this, I?m gonna give him a good talking to!
The bolt creaked out of place. Oruka, recognising the sound of straining metal, looked backwards and saw Koishi working to release him. A tiny ounce of life rose into his eyes, but the crowd was oblivious to it thanks to the general panic distracting them.
The second bolt was a little tighter, and despite her best efforts Koishi couldn?t get a good grip on it. After a moment?s thought, she looked down at the fins she?d ?borrowed? from the Dive Chamber. They were just thin enough to sneak into the gap beneath the bolt, and in a moment of ingenuity she slipped one under and kicked up. The bolt didn?t fly outwards, but it was loose enough that she could get a proper grip now.
By this time, though, another trainer had appeared. This one was more practical than the first, and rather than attempt to take her on in melee combat her pointed a netgun in her direction. It fired silently, and by the time Koishi was aware it was coming it had already entangled her.
Hey! No fair! You guys are playing dirty!
Koishi started trying to pull the net off of herself, but it was just complex enough to distract her. The trainer approached her now, coming from the front and wrapping his arms around her. The plan was to carry her to the surface, where the rest of the guards would be able to apprehend her with ease.
Unfortunately, the last step was still something of a problem, because even if he?d restrained Koishi by the arms, he?d done nothing to stop her feet from moving. And one of them was moving between his legs veeeeeeeery quickly.
Iruka KICK!
As the finned foot caught him in the crotch, the trainer squealed slightly. His grip on Koishi disappeared, and he slowly rose up to the surface with a look of agony on his face. He?d live, but he wouldn?t be having kids for the next week or so. Without no-one to distract her, Koishi managed to make her way out of the net with a little effort and some awkward flailing around.
By now, Oruka was aware that he was being rescued, and started pulling out towards the distant pane once again. The sea beckoned him, but the chain still barely held him down. Koishi put the last touches on removing the second bolt, effectively halving the strength of the chain?s connection to the floor.
As the last two bolts snapped off, and the metal plating holding him to the floor was pulled upwards, Koishi knew it was more than enough.
The crowd was screaming in panic now, and the trainers had decided they weren?t going to risk going down there again. Not with a killer whale on the loose, and not even if there was a juicy bonus on offer. Oruka had immediately started making his pledge for freedom, slamming his entire body against the pane between him and the waters of the ocean. The world seemed to shake as he collided with it, making visible cracks in the surface.
That?s it, Oruka-san! Just a little more!
Koishi had done all she could, but it was clear that the whale was going to take his chance for freedom. He rammed into the window over and over again, the cracks growing larger with every strike. Every hit looked like it would be the last, but the glass pane was surprisingly sturdy.
Not sturdy enough, though, to withstand the desperate onslaught of a killer whale. For the audience, the last hit seemed to be in slow-motion, and for a moment they saw the look of hope on Oruka?s face shift to one of joy as the glass gave way.
An instant later, the tank?s contents were being violently thrown into the waiting ocean. The makeshift waterfall carried fish of every size and colour, and among them Koishi was plummeting down into the sea. The sign she?d been carrying earlier stayed behind in the tank, serving as a souvenir for anyone who?d witnessed the entire ordeal.
Like everything else, Koishi hit the water at high-speed. She lost track of the mouthpiece, gurgling out a yelp of pain as she slammed into something hard beneath her. She was dazed by the impact, too confused to pull herself up to the surface and letting her air flow freely.
It was a relief, then, that the creature she?d landed on gave her a helping hand by carrying up back upwards.
?Hah...Oruka-san??
The whale let off a playful click as she called its name. She?d managed to land on his head, and she looked down to see him smiling as he looked back up at her.
Even if they didn?t share a language, the message of ?Thank you? was one that crossed the language barrier.
?No problem. Dolphin Rider Koishi always looks to help a friend in need!?
She petted Oruka, and he gave off another contented click. Around him, the other fish that had escaped the tank began to swim away, each set to return to its native waters. They were free at last, the lot of them, and they all had Koishi to thank.
?...Now, then.?
Koishi stood up straight on Oruka?s head, pointing into the distance.
?Onward, Oruka-san! To another aquarium, and to another rescu-?
?I think not.?
A hand emerged from the air behind Koishi, grabbing her on the shoulder. A violet gap appeared behind her, and Yukari Yakumo walked out to restrain her.
?You?ve had enough fun here for one day, little girl. It?s time to go home.?
Koishi fought against Yukari?s grip, but the youkai of boundaries was too strong for her. She knew not to give up, though - in this sort of situation, something always showed up in the nick of time to save the heroine! That was how these stories always worked, right? Right?!
?Oh, so you?re still refusing. In that case, I think it?s time to send you back to that friend of yours...?
This time, the gap emerged beneath Koishi, and she fell downward without so much as a chance to yelp. For a moment, she existed in a world of purple, with eyes glaring at her from every direction. They grabbed at her, pulling away the stolen tank and fins, presumably to be returned to their rightful owners. She felt something clink around her feet, and realised she no longer had the ability to hold them apart.
Then the gap opened up again beneath her, and a very familiar lake came back into view.
-----
Winter. I hate winter.
Sango floated along the surface, propelling herself lazily with the occasional kick. She was not a winter person - she was always rather prone to colds and sneezes in this season, but the people around her seemed to be fine. She wondered if she was taking in the bugs and viruses that had made their way into the water as well - if she was, it?d explain why she felt like her nose had been blocked up with solid rock right now.
There was a branch hanging above her, connected to some tree over at her side. It was almost sad to look at, hanging alone without so much as a leaf. For a moment, she thought she saw something purple in the sky above it, but she attributed that to the cold playing tricks on her eyes.
That judgement changed dramatically as something zoomed past her and landed in the water, connected to an iron chain that had looped itself around the branch.
?Phwee!??
Immediately Sango came to her senses and dove downwards. She had no idea what was going on, but whoever was down there was probably in grave danger-
Wait.
She knew that figure. She recognised it more and more the closer she got. It hung upside-down, held in place by a pair of locked ankle cuffs linked to the chain above her. Its captive made no attempt to free herself, and indeed didn?t seem frightened by the ordeal at all.
As Sango approached, Koishi looked up at her and offered her a cheerful wave. She was the reason Koishi had no worries about her survival. She offered the dolphin a greeting, still audible even in the water.
?Hi!? (http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm114/Roukanken/phwee/commission10165uwrjusth.jpg)
Sango looked on in awe for a moment, then promptly slammed a palm into her own face. There was probably a story behind this, but right now she didn?t want to know. The cold was giving her enough of a headache as it was. She wrapped her arms around Koishi?s waist, pulling her up to the surface. The key to the lock fell from the sky soon afterward, allowing Sango to free her from the chains.
?Hey, Sango-chan??
Koishi was immediately set for casual conversation the moment she was free. Most people would have been busy thanking her or just being glad to be alive, but Koishi saw fit to skip that stage entirely.
?Uh, what is it??
?I never knew you had a sister.?
Sango blinked. She didn?t have a sister. In fact, she?d never even mentioned having a sister before.
Now I REALLY don?t wanna hear this story...
-
As I said earlier, this was a fun read. Definitely an hour of proofing well-spent. :3
(I still say that the 8) should remain in the title. :P )
Unfortunately, titles don't work like that. :[
[matsuri]don't care do it anyway :<[/matsuri]
-
No-one stopped to think about how she got hold of it, or why she was using it, because everyone’s attention was on the sign she held aloft, saying in large plain letters ‘SAVE THE WHALES!’
Oh no. You didn't.
You did.
Never give a writer an idea that you aren't ready to expose to the world. :D
-
Oh man, I missed proofing this by minutes. I am sad.
But I'm very amused by all this. Dolphin Rider Koishi saves the day again, with copious amounts of property damage. Serves them right for having such a poorly designed aquarium. ;)
-
The moment I realized that Koishi's legs were bound I realized exactly where the ending was headed...and I love you for it. XD
Also yeah! Stick it to Corporate AmericaJapan!
-
Welp, it's December. You know what that means.
...CRAPPY CHRISTMAS CAROL REWRITE MONTH!
-----
?Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the ?Soak,
Not a creature was stirring
?Cept magical folk.
Though the youkai had plotted
To sing through the night
The miko encountered
Their puzzling sight.
Said the maiden, ?What drives you
To party so late??
They replied, ?Morrow?s Christmas!
We hardly can wait!?
The miko knew nothing
Of this celebration
And smited the party
With one incantation.
A red-white with presents
For kids who?ve done right,
Who travels the whole world
In one single night?
Ridiculous, surely!
The youkai were lying.
She departed shrinewards,
Ignoring their crying.
?We heard it from others!
We?re not those to blame!?
She paid them no mind.
She was sick of this game.
She went home and slumbered,
Through words of frustration.
Too lazy to put up
Just one decoration.
But the source of the rumour
Still walked through the woods,
Her sack full to bursting
With valuable goods.
Though she wasn?t as large
As the stories declared
She was still clad in red-white
And silvery-haired.
In long gloves and stockings
She skipped on with glee,
Though the one-piece she wore
Was designed for the sea.
A satori maiden,
With third eye concealed;
A lock she had planted
To ne?er be revealed.
You?d never have guessed it
From seeing her face,
Endearing and cheerful;
Of sadness, no trace.
The story had come to her
Out of the air,
But one point had struck her
As hugely unfair.
The man offered presents
To humans galore,
But what if o?er animals
Needed them more?
So she?d puts things to right
Where the big man had wronged
And she put all those presents
Out where they belonged.
One name stood out cleanly;
A friend she held dear
Who thanklessly worked
Every day of the year.
It seemed an injustice
To be so ignored;
For surely, the dolphin
Deserved a reward.
So if the old man
Wouldn?t hand out his wealth
There was only one option;
She?d do it herself!
She?d searched high and low
For a gift worth bestowing;
To pass on to Sango
And leave her unknowing.
She?d chosen a toy
That the out-worlders made,
Though she knew not the manner
With which it was played.
She?d found it at Kourin?s;
His glasses were funny.
She hoped he was fine
With her leaving no money.
If he knew her intent
?Twould be simple to see;
His profit should give way
To fair charity.
With her prize held in tow
Just one issue remained.
How could she deliver
That which she had claimed?
To deliver the presents
?Fore Sango would wake,
She?d have to traverse
The whole length of the lake.
But the child was both cunning
And clinically mad,
And she stumbled on lakeside
In gaudy dress clad.
To start with, she?d picked up
An old kappa trick;
Two scarlet-red flippers
To add to her kick.
The tank on her back
Would supply her with air;
Another device she had
?Borrowed? with care.
Come morning she?d place them
Right back in their stall;
As if they had never
Been taken at all.
For now they would suit her.
The lakeside drew near.
She checked one last time
On the state of her gear.
Conditions were perfect.
The time had arrived.
She took a short run-up
Then gracefully dived.
She removed from her bag
A whole handful of snacks
So tomorrow the fishies
Could feast and relax.
She swam round the edges
And emptied the sack,
Save for one wrapped-up gift box
On which she held back.
This present was special,
With a target in mind.
She swam to the lakebed
And left it behind.
The present was labelled
?To Sango, with love?,
But its owner had already
Vanished above.
The gift would work
If she had any luck.
The dolphin would find use
In that rubber duck.
If humans would use it
At bathtime to play,
Then Sango would toy with it
Every day!
She rose to the surface
Her mission complete.
She skipped right back home
With a spring in her feet.
The moral; for all you
Who clean up the sea:
Merry Christmas to all,
And to all a good phwee.
-----
?The hell is this duck for?!
Just what does it mean?
And look at this mess
I?m expected to clean!
The fish are all stuffed
But there?s plenty to spare!
All this food-clearing?s making me
Tear out my hair!?
So the dolphin awoke
To a case complicated;
Her workload obscene
And her outlook frustrated.
The moral, in that case,
Is this circumvention;
Bad things can result
From a well-meant intention.
-----
And yes. This being me, I managed to convince some poor soul to draw a picture of the aforemented Koishi getup. (http://img836.imageshack.us/img836/7964/ssubservice.jpg)
Now if you don't mind me, I need to go get a bigger stocking. Santa didn't have enough room to fit all that coal in my old one last year.
-
That entire time, I was imagining it being narrated by James Earl Jones. I couldn't come up with a good mental image of him going "phwee!", though.
-
And yes. This being me, I managed to convince some poor soul to draw a picture of the aforemented Koishi getup. (http://img836.imageshack.us/img836/7964/ssubservice.jpg)
underwater thighhighs
At least Sango will probably like the duck after some time passes. :3
-
At least Sango will probably like the duck after some time passes. :3
Suddenly and unbidden, the mental image of a dolphin swimming around, tending the waters, then stopping to give the rubber ducky a squeeze, made me giggle uncontrollable. Yes, I giggled. Like a schoolgirl.
-
*no updates for three months*
HEY GUYS I'M BACK SORRY I WAS GONE
Dunno why Succession got its own thread and this didn't. Eh. *shrug*
-----
There?s a saying among the white wolf tengu. It?s not one of those politically correct morals that you pass around as a kid?s growing up, like ?The great blue sky is yours to explore? or ?You are the shield that keeps the mountain steady?. This is the catchphrase that mothers whisper in their child?s ear when they see an unsightly sort across the street - someone with a glint in their eye, and a story on their mind.
?Momiji, never let a crow feed you. You?ll have a lifetime to wish you?d just gone hungry.?
In retrospect, I was probably too young when my mother told me that. Too trusting. Why was mommy being so mean to the lady with the wings? We were all tengu, weren?t we? That meant we should be friends and work together.
Boy, did that mistake cost me.
Crow tengu are an invaluable asset to the Youkai Mountain?s defenses in that they scare most armies out of attacking at all. They don?t fight with swords or bullets like the wolves do. Their weapons are quills, rhetoric, and as much slander as they can fit on a page. All too often a foreign youkai who thinks too much of themselves has invaded, been knocked back home, and finds that the story of their humiliating defeat has somehow managed to make it to their friends before they actually get back themselves. As a result, most of Gensokyo is frightened out of attacking us without the tengu having to so much as lift a finger.
Which is great and all, but it means us white wolves are sort of left out of the equation.
When most people in Gensokyo think of tengu, they imagine youkai flying around with black wings and cameras flashing every which way. It?s a common misconception, given that crow tengu are the only race to leave the mountain with any frequency. In fact, there are several tengu races that have no birdlike features at all, and the white wolves are one of them. Rather than the journalism that Gensokyo?s written off the entire race as specialising in, the white wolf tengu are assigned as the mountain?s guardians. We serve as guards on patrol, and fight off any intruder that has no place on our mountain.
Of course, thanks to the above issue with the crow tengu, there?s very little in the way of intrusion on the mountain. Which makes the white wolf patrol very, very dull. It?s not unheard of for sentries to slack off the job entirely and go unpunished, because the people who are supposed to be watching over them are slacking off as well, and no-one notices THEM because the level above is missing, and so on until it turns out there?s only one guard doing her job on the whole damn mountain.
That?s me, in case you hadn?t guessed.
Momiji Inubashiri isn?t a name you?ll hear often passed around the mountain. When it is, it?s usually along with labels like ?the workaholic? and ?the party-pooper?. I?m fine with that; I take pride in my work, and contrary to popular belief I manage to find enough time off duty to play a damn good game of shogi.
Being ?Momiji Inubashiri, Shameimaru?s lapdog?, on the other hand, I?m not so keen on.
Remember what I said earlier about never letting a crow feed you? The meaning?s about as simple as it sounds - never owe a favour to a crow tengu, or they?ll come collecting every chance they can. In the unlikely event that you manage to pay off your debt, they?ll have dug up some sort of embarrassing secret which they promise not to reveal as long as you help them with this little favour...and this other one...and whatever she can find to make you do after that.
Thus, whenever I?m not doing my REAL job or taking a break, I?m being hauled around on one of Aya Shameimaru?s little errands.
She caught me off guard after a long day at post. She probably heard my stomach rumbling from a mile away and sensed the opportunity. Crows have a sense like that - at least, that?s the only way I figure they can be so good at what they do. Before I knew it, there was a cheerful young woman at my side offering to buy me dinner ?as a reward for my faithful defense of the mountain?.
In retrospect, her plan was flawless. While one hand was placed around my shoulder, the other cunningly slid a camera across the ground. A camera that came to a rather neat stop between my legs, pointing upwards, and took a perfect shot of the contents of my skirt. Now I?ve got no choice but to do her bidding when she asks it of me, or the latest issue of the Bunbunmaru will have a breaking headline about the underwear choices of the mountain guard.
And I have the strange suspicion that I?m not alone in that. I said beforehand that the other white wolves were slacking off, but I?ve never actually seen anyone relaxing when they?re meant to be on shift. It?s perfectly possible that we?re all in the pocket of a crow, and Aya?s just thoughtful enough not to let her side jobs clash with my shifts so I can maintain my pride as a member of the white wolf guard.
Or she?s heartless enough to make me work two jobs instead of one. I haven?t decided which yet.
-----
It?s always easy to tell when Aya?s coming. As much as she brags about being the fastest in Gensokyo, there?s no way she?d ever qualify as the most subtle.
First of all, it?s always during my day off, or when I?m just coming off shift. Either she?s got a hold of my timetable and knows exactly when I?m available, or she?s just watching all the time and waiting for the first moment to haul me in. The latter possibility has stopped me from sleeping at night without first locking every door and shuttering every window in my house.
Secondly, I?ve developed an ability to hear her from miles away. White wolf tengu already have better senses than the rest of our kind, but experience has taught me how to pick out the noises Aya makes on her approach. The whooshing of wind, the muttering beneath her breath, and the plopping of her geta shoes on the ground as she lands behind me. (Always behind me, never in front. I wish she?d stop doing that.)
Thirdly, it?s always just when I?m about to take a break. If I so much as let out a deep breath, that?s her cue to decide I?ve not got anything better to do and intrude. Even if my plan was to go show one of the local kappa how bad they were at shogi, she?s not got time to listen to silly things that what I want to do.
My plan to avoid this usually revolves around looking busy for as long as possible, even if I?m not. Carrying my sword and shield around helps, mainly because it adds the threat of her losing that head of hers if she suggests something too ridiculous. But these things are heavy, and in the summers the mountain?s climate is almost unbearable.
This led to me finally giving in and trying to cool myself off with a fan before I ended up giving myself heatstroke. This meant that the sword had to drop out of my hand momentarily, and almost as soon as I?d let go of it-
?Morning, Momiji!?
Another fan starting blowing around behind me. This one was stronger than my lousy paper one, though - imbued with the magic of the crow tengu. For once, Aya?s specialty was actually being helpful, and the cool breeze made me forget for a moment why I couldn?t stand the woman.
?They say puppies die if they get too hot. What?re you doing outside??
Fortunately, she reminded me almost instantly.
Turning around, I was once again confronted with the woman who held my reputation in the palm of her hand. She was standing on one foot - most likely to show off - as she blew more of these cooling winds straight into my face. The baggy white blouse she always favoured blew about as she fluttered around her fan, but the black skirt never budged an inch. Aya was a highly powerful manipulator of wind - most likely she knew enough about tengu blackmail to not leave herself open to any other journalists looking to claim a scalp.
?...I?m doing what I?m supposed to be doing, Aya. My job.?
It was a lie, of course. The same lie I always told, and the same lie Aya never believed. She liked to rub it in, though, and as she put her fan away she took out in its place a small notebook. Quickly thumbing through the pages, she came across whatever note she was looking for and let out a gasp of faint surprise.
?Oh, really? Well, that?s a bit of a shock, because according to my research you usually finish up your shift at three in the afternoon. Which is...about half an hour ago, I believe.?
Her face was the sort I had to make a conscious effort not to punch. Red eyes glaring at me - maybe through me - and ears pointed up like the nose of a blue-blooded noble. Worse than any of that, though, was the fact she smiled all the time, even when she was in the middle of threatening me out of my place on the guard.
?Hey, don?t give me that look! I think you?ll like this job I?ve got for you, Momiji. Should help you...cool off a little, so to speak.?
Aya reached into the bag at her side, where she normally stored her papers. Rummaging for a copy of the latest issue, she threw it into my face just fast enough for me to not catch it. The paper caught me square in the face, and the wind was nice enough to hold it there until I pulled it off.
?New Discovery In Gensokyo - The Crystal Waters??
The picture on the headline was a lake, but not one I recognised. There seemed to be something beneath the surface at one side of it - reaching out from the lakebeds, like the branches of a tree. I squinted at the photo for a moment, not able to quite figure out what I was looking at.
?Ah, I see the eyes of the white wolf know how to pick up the interesting parts. The kappa insist that?s something called coral. It?s a long story, but just assume they?re sea creatures shaped like plants.
I wasn?t even aware Aya had moved behind me until she spoke up. That voice of hers was enough to send a shiver down my spine.
?OK, I don?t get this. How exactly do you ?discover? a lake? Is it in some hidden mountain valley or something??
Aya smirked at my side. I?d learned from years of experience that this was a sign of terrible things to come.
?See, that?s the interesting thing. Up until a few days ago, that spot was just a regular plain. Now all of a sudden there?s a lake there, and the water is stunning - they call it the Crystal Waters because it?s crystal clear, like nothing you?ll ever see in Gensokyo. My idea, by the way, and I think you?ll agree it?s perfectly fitting.?
She chuckled, patting herself on the back. What I?d give to join in and ?accidentally? push her too hard so she fell off the mountain.
?Anyway, this is big news for Gensokyo, so everyone?s eager to get the scoop. Thing is, there?s one level that no-one?s bothered to go to - everyone?s got shots of the lake from a distance, but no-one?s taken a look beneath the surface.?
I gulped. Aya had worded that sentence very particularly, and the point she was trying to get across made it to me with ease. In a vain attempt at self-preservation, I thought of anything resembling a better alternative.
?If it?s the water, I?m pretty sure the kappa are the people to go to. They?ve got the technology for waterproof photography, right??
?That they do, and I happen to have a camera for that right there. Thing is, none of the kappa want to go anywhere near that place.?
That was not a good sign. When Aya needed a kappa to help her out, she had ?favours? to collect from a good dozen of them. They were much easier to get hold of than the white wolves, mainly because we as a race are brought up to be cautious of the crows.
So if a dozen kappa had something to be afraid of when it came to that lake, something BIG was going on.
?...Dangerous??
Aya grinned.
?Sure as hell. They say there?s a youkai in the waters that gobbles up anyone who dives in. No-one?s gone in and come back out alive.?
I gulped again, louder this time. This time I could see the devilish glint in her eyes as she rummages through her bag again, holding out an all-too-familiar photograph.
I will not state its contents for the sake of my personal dignity.
?So, Momiji, feel like doing me a little favour??
And so, once again, I found myself facing a familiar dilemma: give in to Aya?s demands and take on a job that had a good chance at killing me, or refuse and watch as everyone in Gensokyo finds out exactly what colour my panties are.
Yeah, I?d go for the deadly job any day of the week.
-----
As it turned out, the Crystal Waters were only about half an hour?s flight from the foot of the mountain. I?d actually crossed the plains that had been here once, so it was strange to see that the land was suddenly replaced with what must?ve been tonnes of water.
Aya had decided not to accompany me. She had better things to do, like interrogate shrine maidens who had fallen into poverty or dig up the latest dirt on whatever drunken oni had found their way to the surface this week. Helping out a friend who she was potentially sending into a life-or-death situation? Not important enough.
I swore to myself that if anything happened to her, there wouldn?t be a court in the world that?d find me guilty.
At least she?d thought far ahead enough to offer me enough equipment to stand a good chance of not dying. The kappa who had turned her down had instead supplied diving gear for the poor sucker who WAS getting forced into the job. It came in the form of a tank I had to strap to my back along with the mouthpiece it gave me to breathe from, and a pair of fins that?d give me stronger kicks in the water. I was thankful for the latter in particular - my training in the white wolves hadn?t really covered water in detail, and I wasn?t a very strong swimmer.
She also offered me something...personal. And by ?offered?, I pretty much mean ?forced on me?. In her own words, she wasn?t sure if I had a swimsuit and thought this would suit me. It was a simple white one-piece with a maple-leaf pattern running in a line down the front. Sure enough, it fit me like a glove, and that was exactly what worried me about it so much. Every inch of it fit flawlessly, as if she?d had this thing custom made for my measurements. There was even a tiny little slit for my tail to slip through.
I eventually decided it was better than going naked. But only just.
I waited until I reached the edge of the lake before starting on getting changed. I had a sneaking suspicion that the moment I started showing skin there would be a barrage of camera flashes, and suddenly Aya would have twice as much material to hold against me. Out of precaution (or paranoia, depending on who you ask) I did my changing in a nearby set of bushes, and the fact I didn?t hear any photos being taken was already a weight off my soul.
From there, it was a difficult waddle in the fins to the edge of the Crystal Waters. I sat down at the side for a second to get my bearings and made sure I?d followed the foot-long list of precautions the kappa had included along with this thing. Do Not Use If Regulator Shows Signs Of Puncturing? I gave it a quick once over, and it looked fine. Ensure Tank Is Filled Before Use? Given how heavy it was, it?d better be full. Do Not Wear Upside Down? ...Yeah, I had that taken care of.
Do Not Use In...Space? I had to read that one a couple of times over to check if I?d misread it, but apparently they really needed to issue a warning about that. Whoever had written this list had a screw loose. Or two. Or maybe a dozen.
With the whole list checked off, it was time to get started on my little photography session. I?d been given one more present from the kappa - a waterproof camera, with enough film to take thirty shots. Aya was always going on about how this was some sort of secret art that took years of practice, but it couldn?t be that tough. Point camera, take shot, get photo. What else could there be to it?
I took a moment to look at the surface of the lake before I started the dive. The sun was starting to set in the distance, and as it fell its light bounced off the water with flawless beauty, turning it a radiant shade of orange. I?m relatively sure I sat in place for a few seconds with my jaw open before I came back to my senses. For once, Aya had been telling the truth - this was the sort of landscape that gods would savour. The only competition I?d seen was the occasional lake at the foot of the Youkai Mountain, but only in the mornings after whoever it was who took care of those waters had done their job.
To be honest, I was a little frightened as I bit down on the mouthpiece and fell into the water. Kappa had always come across as slightly unhinged to me, and the instruction manual they?d handed me was doing nothing to calm me down. Now I was expected to trust their inventions literally with my life. All it would take was one misplaced bolt and I?d be inhaling water rather than air.
It must have been thirty seconds or so before I built up the courage to breathe in. The lack of imminent drowning was enough to put my concerns to rest. By then, I was about thirty feet beneath the surface, but the bottom was still far, far beneath me. My vision was perfect, even beneath the water, and it wouldn?t have surprised me to hear that this thing was hundreds of feet deep.
Not just that - this water was warm. Too warm, even. True, it was summer, and the sun was hitting it cleanly, but that still didn?t explain how it was quite this warm. That left the obvious answer - magic - but the answer to that was probably somewhere deep down. I?d take care of that later; for now, I had to go examine this ?coral? stuff.
As I clumsily kicked my way over to the reef nearby, I was surprised at how abandoned the lake seemed to be. There was the occasional fish passing by, but in much smaller numbers than I expected from a lake of this size. The ones that did appear seemed frightened, cautious, darting away the instant I came within camera range. I wasted the first five shots of the film on blurry shots of fish that were darting away. Suddenly I understood why Aya claimed this was so hard - if your target wasn?t willing, getting good shots was impossible.
And all of Aya?s subjects were unwilling...damn, maybe she was good at this after all.
Thankfully, the coral promised to be less of a challenge. It didn?t slide backwards into the wall as I approached it. It didn?t pop out and try to stab me, either. It just...stayed there, totally still, as if it wanted to have its photo taken. This was a comforting change from the rest of the creatures I?d tried to photograph, so I had more than enough time to position myself before taking the shot.
?Gbblblblbl...!??
The kappa had found a way to electronically display the image without developing the film, giving me a chance to see my shots before I made my trip back. Imagine my frustration to find a perfectly good shot blocked by my own air bubbles. I took another one to make up for it, making sure to do it while I was inhaling this time. Damn kappa and their inventions.
Photos were nice and all, but I had to admit I was curious about this stuff. What was it, exactly? What purpose did it serve? Why did Aya insist it was a long story when it came to whether it was a plant or an animal? Unable to put the thought to rest, I reached out towards the material and ran my hand across it.
?Agglb!?
Bad move. Bad, bad move. Whatever this stuff was, it was sharp, and I?d managed to open up a gash on my right hand. Crimson blood leaked out into the water, darkening its shade slightly. I winced, muttering some sort of profanity through the mouthpiece. It wasn?t anything dangerous, but it was always the shallowest cuts that hurt the most.
I had some pictures. It was probably an idea to at least wait for this cut to fix itself before going any deeper. It?d be hard to hold the camera with a hand like this, after all, and it?d only take a few minutes at most. Clenching the hand into a fist to try and stop the bleeding, I made my way back up to the surface.
The first thing I did was spit out the goddamn mouthpiece. Maybe it was air, but that stuff was stale and only barely breathable. Coming from someone used to the high-altitude air of the mountains, that was one hell of an insult.
The hand would need a little while to heal. There was probably a little trail of blood in the water now, but there hadn?t been anything dangerous from what I?d seen. I?d need to be more careful on the next trip, though - I hadn?t had a chance to look deeper, and I hadn?t bumped into this super-dangerous youkai that Aya had been going on about. Then again, I had no reason to think she was telling the truth - I was no idiot. If no-one came back alive from the lake, who would pass on the story? I?d lived with tengu journalism for years, and I had faith in my ability to catch them in the middle of a li-
My foot.
Something.
Was digging into.
My foot.
?Ah-?
Before I even had time to cry out, I found myself plunging into the depths once again.
-----
It took a few seconds for my brain to catch up with current events. I put far too much breath into my yelling, and all it earned me was a stream of bubbles that no-one would notice. By the time I was aware I was underwater again, the mouthpiece had already drifted off to the side, and my flailing had left it tied in an unholy knot around my arm. By the time I got that thing undone, I?d have drowned twice over.
But the worst part was that my current lack of air was in fact the least of my worries. The feeling of shock from before evolved into a feeling of abject pain. There was more blood drifting upwards to the surface, and I knew for a fact that it was mine. Whatever had stabbed into my foot, it had gone in deep enough to practically leave the foot unusable. It had no plans of letting go, either, and it was dragging me down into the darkness of the lakebed.
In my panicked state, I only managed to get a few glimpses of my attacker?s face. I saw tanned skin, short, cropped black hair waving around in time with the currents, and a pair of dead black eyes staring up into mine without fear. Her teeth - plentiful, and horribly sharp - were currently digging into my foot with ease. On her back, I could make out the outline of a fish?s fin.
Not just any fish. A shark.
?Hmm-mmmmh!?
With my other foot I made to kick the creature, convince it to give up on the quarry. I slammed the fin into the side of its head with all the strength I could manage. The monster barely responded - in fact, all it did was bite down on my trapped foot even harder.
There were no words for how bad this was. Either I was going to be eaten alive by this creature, or fate would be merciful and let me drown first. Either way, I wasn?t going out of this alive.
For a moment, I forgot my peril, and took a note that this was the first time Aya had made an outrageous claim that turned out to be true.
More kicking followed, mainly out of sheer fear. I didn?t want to die - a fear I?m willing to argue is perfectly legitimate - but even in my state I could tell hammering this thing in the back of the head repeatedly was going to get me all of nowhere. My chest was burning, and the surface was only getting further and further away.
?G...gbblblbl...?
I became vaguely aware that I was letting out air without realising it. I?d had no chance to breathe before I was pulled under, and the screaming hadn?t done me any good either. Already my consciousness was beginning to fade, and the foot I was kicking with began to wander and flail at every point on the creature?s head.
I had all but given up. This was where Momiji Inubashiri, workaholic mountain guard and lapdog of Aya Shameimaru, was going to meet her end. I?d hoped for something more triumphant - sacrificing myself to win a major battle, or giving my life to seal some great evil. Getting munched on by a shark didn?t quite rank up there on my Best Ways To Die list.
Then came the three words that reinspired me to fight for my survival.
?Ow! My nose!?
Somehow, my free foot had caught the creature in the nose, and it released my foot as it recoiled from the blow. Apparently, its nose was its weak point - a fact I wished I?d known fifteen seconds earlier when I?d started. I?d make sure to mention that shark combat should come up in white wolf training.
There wasn?t time to celebrate my escape. I needed to breathe, and fast. It?d still take too long to untie the mouthpiece, so I had to break for the surface. One foot sent waves of pain up my leg as I kicked with it, and I grit my teeth while resisting the urge to scream. I was already low on air - I couldn?t afford to waste more on useless cries of pain.
For a while, I didn?t think I was going to make it. The light looked just a little too far away, my legs were moving just too slowly, my chest hurt that little bit too much. In that regard, I?m proud to say that I underestimated myself, and that the breath I took as I broke the surface was perhaps the best breath I?ve taken in my entire life.
?Haaaaah!?
Again, no time to rest. It wasn?t safe in the water. I needed to get out. Using the momentum I?d built up from swimming to the surface, I let myself fly upwards a few feet. No more than that - too much exertion, and I was hurting too much to try anything that drastic. Slowly and carefully I carried myself over to the side of the lake where, like any good person would do at that point, I promptly fell to the floor exhausted.
?Haah...haah...haaah...?
With all my panting, I was probably robbing the nearby plants of their air. Frankly, I didn?t give a damn. I?d basically stared death in the face down there, and I had the scars to show for it. Looking back, I could see the bite marks in my foot, still with faint trails of blood on them. This wasn?t a minor wound like the gash on my hand - this would take maybe an hour to recover fully, and until then I wasn?t really going very far.
I was in no mood to complain about a sore foot, though. What mattered more than anything was that I was alive. The camera was gone - I?d dropped it during the attack - and one of the fins had been mauled beyond recognition. But I was still breathing, and my heart was still beating strong, even if it had slightly less blood to work with than usual.
For a few minutes, I just lay on the ground smiling like an idiot. There was nothing like a near-death experience to remind you how wonderful life really was.
I was pulled out of my stupor by a tiny voice coming from the lake.
?Um...miss??
My heart sank. With what little strength I had left, I pulled my head upwards, looking down into the water. Floating barely above the surface, with only her head above water, was the creature that had nearly killed me five minutes ago.
Wait...was it? I wasn?t sure. It was the same tanned skin, same black hair, but there was none of the menacing presence of the shark that attacked me. Where it had giant, brutal fangs this girl had maybe one fang sticking out in front of her lip, and it was a tiny specimen. Instead of the soulless, black eyes that had stared at me, she had dark blue eyes that rang of innocence, of...apology.
?You, um, dropped this.?
One arm rose up from the water, throwing something up onto the shore. It was the camera, still in perfect working condition, and about twenty shots still to take. With that handed over, the creature looked ready to back off and disappear into the lake again.
?Wait!?
Not that I was going to let it. From the way her head was only barely bobbing up, this girl had gills. That meant she couldn?t get out of the lake, and therefore she was no threat to me at this point. Besides that, she seemed...docile now. Calm. Intelligent.
Honestly, my first surprise was that she actually responded to my request. Eagerly, in fact, like she was trying to atone for her earlier attempt to eat me.
?Y-Yes??
I had to allow myself a little smile. Maybe I wasn?t going to get Aya the pictures she wanted, but an interview with the dreaded shark youkai of the Crystal Waters had to count for something.
?I?m not going anywhere for a while. Feel like talking??
-----
We started off with the simple questions. Name, occupation, race, reasons for coming to Gensokyo. If anything, I probably sounded like a visa examiner more than a journalist. Maybe I just wasn?t cut out for Aya?s line of work. Maybe that was a good thing.
The girl answered slowly, stuttering on her words every so often. Her name was Jozu Manou, and she was apparently what was called an aumakua - a shark from a foreign island imbued with the soul of a dead human. After the two had become one, the aumakua was to work alongside their former family as their defender, helping with fish-catching and fighting off intruders. Jozu was one of those creatures - or at least, she had been.
?My family, um...died out. There were no sons, the daughters died with no children, and in the end the family I was meant to protect just...stopped existing. I don?t really remember a lot after that...I think I was drifting around, looking for someone else to take care of, but by then my people had stopped believing in the aumakua altogether...?
Jozu was sniffling slightly as she spoke. I wasn?t even aware that sharks could cry, but maybe youkai just followed different rules. I?d have felt sorry for her if it wasn?t for one tiny detail.
?...So, you?re meant to be some sort of guardian, right??
Jozu nodded quickly. She didn?t seem to get my point until I pointed at the still-obvious bite marks on my foot.
?So what exactly where you protecting from me when you did this??
That, it seemed, was the trigger that set her off. Not into another furious killing rage like I half expected, but rather a panicked leap out of the water followed by an unending stream of apologies.
?I?m really sorry about that! I do it a lot, I know, but I can?t control it! When I smell blood, it?s like something washes over me and I can?t do anything and all of a sudden I wanna eat and-I?m a shark, okay?! It?s what I do!?
Jozu?s webbed hands were flailing around in all sorts of desperate gestures as she spoke, still dripping wet. Her outfit reminded me of one of those other inventions Aya insisted I NOT use - a wetsuit, they?d called it. Hers was pure silver, with a long white stripe running down her front.
?Really, I?m not a bad person, I swear! Everyone gets so interested in the coral and cut themselves and then I realise I?ve managed to bite someone?s arm off again! It?s not like I?ve killed anyone yet, and it?s always been youkai so they get better, but I don?t know how to sto-?
The last word cut off in her throat with a choking sound. The gills on her neck started to flap around, trying to take in water from their surroundings, but there was nothing to be had. Grabbing at her neck, Jozu tumbled backwards into the water with a heaving splash, and I found myself with another layer of water on top of all the soakings I?d already had today.
She surfaced a few seconds later, panting for breath like I had been a short while beforehand.
?Um...yeah, sorry about that. When I get nervous, I kind of forget about the whole air thing...I?ve been practicing, though! Every day I try to step out of the lake and take a breath! It, uh, hasn?t gone anywhere yet, but it should work! Eventually!?
There was something almost adorable about this girl?s naivete, but at the same time she was almost pitiful in her inability to control herself. I could see that the apology she was giving was genuine, but this was undoubtedly the same girl who?d heartlessly tried to kill me. ?Conflicted? was the only word I could really find to describe my feelings at that point.
?...Look, I?m really sorry about the whole nearly eating you thing. It?s what sharks do, and I can?t go against my nature. If it means anything, you?re the first one to actually hang around and talk to me, and...I appreciate that. It?s really lonely around here, especially when you keep nearly eating all the people who might become your friends.?
That sentence was so strange even in context that I had to giggle a little. Jozu pouted at my response, and I couldn?t really blame her given that she was trying to be serious.
?So, uh, I know this might not be the best time to ask this after what we?ve been through...but do you think you could come around here more often? I?m pretty good with protective charms, so I should be able to make something that?ll stop me from trying to eat you again, even if you bleed.?
There was a look of definite loneliness in Jozu?s eyes as she looked away. She probably already expected me to say no and laugh as she sank back into the water, still friendless.
?...Huh. Why not??
She definitely wasn?t expecting me to say that. She almost jumped out of the water again in response to my statement, her face quickly widening into another broad grin.
?R-Really? You mean it??
I nodded. Even if this was a trick and she turned on me again, I knew her weak point now. All it?d take was a smack in the nose and she?d be back to normal. Jozu was ecstatic.
?Thank you so, so much! Wait a minute, I think I know what I can give you!?
Jozu fell beneath the water again, and didn?t surface for a few minutes. When she did, it was holding a pendant, made hastily out of well-folded kelp, with a large white object hanging on it.
A large, white, sharp object.
?I...Is that your own tooth??
Jozu nodded eagerly.
?You knocked it out with that kick of yours, so I don?t really need it any more. It?s a good luck charm among my people, and if you wear it I should be able to resist the bloodlust even if you come near me.?
She smiled, letting me see her teeth for a moment. They were much blunter than before, and for that I was eternally grateful.
?It?s not just that, too. It?s a sign we?re friends, and that you?ve got an aumakua watching over you. People treasured these a lot back home, so don?t lose it, okay?!?
She glared sternly at me as she handed the pendant over. Initially I wasn?t sure if it would stay together, but given how quickly it was made the kelp actually held together pretty damn well. In fact, it almost looked sort of cute hanging from my neck like that.
?Thanks. I?ll take good care of it.?
Slowly, I pulled myself to my feet. The wound was just about closed up now, and I could stand with no real problems. It was getting late, and I probably needed to get back into my old clothes before I froze to death out here.
?Make sure to come back, okay?! Bring friends, too! Just tell them not to touch the coral!?
I nodded absentmindedly. As if she needed to remind me about that after what she?d put me through.
-----
?Well, you?re back late.?
Aya was waiting at the foot of the mountain when I arrived. She looked disappointed, as if an earlier opening for her photos had never arrived. An opening like the time I?d changed into my swimsuit earlier. I grinned in response, claiming a moral victory for myself.
?Yeah, sorry. Got slightly caught up with your killer youkai and all that.?
Aya?s mouth fell open into a small circle. I couldn?t recall the last time she?d actually displayed surprise, so it was a satisfying look.
?R-Really?! You got pictures, right? Witnesses? A testimony?! Anything, everything you?ve got, Momiji! Right now!?
This was when I got to pull the smug face. I put an arm around Aya?s shoulder, pulling her in close and whispering in her ear with a voice of total confidence. It was a shame I didn?t have the scars anymore, but apparently we tengu have a special ability we pass along in the blood.
We?re all excellent liars when we choose to be.
?Oh, I?ve got a lot to tell you, Aya. About Jozu Manou, almighty shark deity of the distant seas...and my new best friend.?
-----
Thanks to Sect for helping me put this together. Hell, he's the one who came up with the aumakua idea, so thanks again. *hat-tip*
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I was wondering if the shark actually spoke. Nicely done.
Also, now you've got a shark loli and a dolphin loli. Surely they will become beeeeest buddies right? :V
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I was wondering if the shark actually spoke. Nicely done.
Also, now you've got a shark loli and a dolphin loli. Surely they will become beeeeest buddies right? :V
Crossover fic.
Fund it.
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I'm sure Sango and Jozu will get swimmingly along.
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I'm not exactly a big fan of Momiji, but I have to say, this was pretty good. But then, all your stuff's good, so that really wasn't a surprise. And no, I will not be surprised if Sango and Jozu end up meeting at some point.
Anyways, glad to see you're still writing something, and I hope you get back to DRK soon.
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I'm not exactly a big fan of Momiji, but I have to say, this was pretty good. But then, all your stuff's good, so that really wasn't a surprise. And no, I will not be surprised if Sango and Jozu end up meeting at some point.
Anyways, glad to see you're still writing something, and I hope you get back to DRK soon.
Suddenly, we dig through DRK and find that Jozu was one of Koishi's classmates in an earlier chapter!
CHEKHOV'S GUN
-
Sup guys, did I win the race for First TH13 Fiction?
(Obviously, TH13 spoilers follow. BEWARE.)
-----
Mountains are more than mere peaks of rock. Inside them, caverns and tunnels burrow deep beneath the peaks, some coming all the way out to the other end. Sometimes, these tunnels are inhabited; other times, there isn?t a sound of a living thing to be heard in them.
At least, not until a mouse speaks up.
?I honestly don?t understand why you pulled me up here.?
Nazrin squinted in both directions, unable to see the start of the end of the tunnel. Only the pagoda at her feet gave her the ability to make out her own hand. She could make out a variety of scuffles along her grey dress, grimacing at the sight of them.
Her companion didn?t answer with words, raising a hand up to silence Nazrin. She had lowered herself into a meditative pose, laying out the pagoda in front of her. It bounced off of her blonde hair all-too naturally, and against her black streaks its colour was even more radiant.
?Listen, Nazrin.?
The monk whispered so that her voice wouldn?t carry. Nazrin seemed confused, her ears twitching in obedience to her master?s command. Sure enough, she could hear a voice in the distance, bouncing back at her.
?...here...here...here...?
Nazrin blinked at the sound of it. Not because it was unusual, but distinctly because it was so thoroughly ordinary. As a precaution, she kept her voice down as she spoke to the tiger seated beside her.
?Shou, that?s an echo. I don?t get what?s so incredible about it.?
Shou sighed, but otherwise didn?t budge. Like Nazrin, her red and white robes had suffered their share of dirt on the journey up here. Shou if anything had it worse than Nazrin, given that as she sat down she was basically covering her robes in this grey muck. She paid it no mind - material possessions, after all. No use getting too attached to them. They were for keeping her warm and protected, nothing else.
?I?d have expected you to know the rumour before me, Nazrin. Haven?t you heard about the echoing voice of the fallen monk??
Nazrin looked at Shou as if she?d just claimed to be the latest reincarnation of the Dalai Lama. Shou had been expecting this response, and continued on with her explanation almost immediately.
?Normally, the voice that echoes through this cavern is like any other echo. But when it comes to reciting sutras...?
With that, Shou allowed her body to relax, her attentiveness drifting off into the distance. Her eyes opened, seeing without looking. Her own ears perked up, hearing without listening. She was at one with the world, and yet at the same time she could be no more distant from it. This was a trance state she had built up through centuries of training, far beyond that of any human practitioner. If she so desired, she could have even repeated the 49-day meditation of the Buddha beneath the bodhi tree - but she was too busy with shrine duties to spend time on that.
Nazrin watched Shou intently, with something between irritation and curiosity. She hadn?t wanted to come here. It was her one day off, and she?d been planning to spend it in bed or something equally useless. Even in her spare time, however, Shou held sway over her, and thus she?d found herself hauled into some mountain cavern in the middle of nowhere. There wasn?t even anything interesting to look at - solid rock in every direction, no matter where she looked.
Shou?s mouth slowly opened. She spoke with impressive volume, the syllables slipping off her tongue with absolute precision and flawless grace.
?We respectfully invite the Green Vajra Who Banishes Disasters.
We respectfully invite the Vajra Who Banishes Toxins.
We respectfully invite the Yellow Vajra Who Grants Wishes.
We respectfully invite the White Vajra Who Purifies Water...?
Nazrin recognised the excerpt. It was from the Vajra Sutra - a condensed form of one of the highest tomes, the Diamond Sutra. At this point, Shou was to call upon the eight Vajra for protection, but she had only named four. The mouse tilted her head, not sure why Shou had fallen silent.
The voice that echoed back across the tunnel was a suitable explanation.
?...We respectfully invite the Red Vajra Whose Sound Brings Fire.
We respectfully invite the Vajra Who Pacifies Disasters.
We respectfully invite the Vajra Purple Worthy.
We respectfully invite the Vajra Great Spirit.?
Shou didn?t make any visible reaction to her own apparent voice, other than a slight grin rising to her face. Nazrin, meanwhile, was taken aback.
?How did-?
Again, Shou?s hand rose up to stop Nazrin from speaking. The mouse pouted, but obeyed. Entirely unfazed, Shou continued with the sutra.
?We respectfully invite The Bodhisattva Vajra Company.
We respectfully invite The Bodhisattva Vajra Rope.?
The voice in the distance spoke up once more. Nazrin paid attention to it this time, pricking up her potent ears. She grimaced - something was wrong with the voice that returned to her.
?...We respectfully invite The Bodhisattva Vajra Affection.
We respectfully invite The Bodhisattva Vajra Speech.?
It was too high-pitched. Too - how to word this - cheerful. It was not a sad voice, or indeed a voice that meant any harm, but it was not her master?s voice. Shou seemed unaware of this, continuing the sutra regardless.
Nazrin wasn?t set to leave this unanswered, and so walked off into the darkness by herself. She?d have to just follow the sound of the voice if she had to. Shou?s words still travelled through the cave, reaching Nazrin from behind as she walked onward.
?I bow my head to the one honored in all three realms, and take refuge with the Buddhas of all Ten Directions. I now make this solemn vow to always uphold this Vajra Sutra.?
?My rewards will repay the four kindnesses above, and aid those in the three sufferings below.
All who see and hear this, bring forth the resolve for Bodhi, so that when this mortal body is done we shall be reborn in Nirvana.?
The voice that came from in front of Nazrin - the so-called ?echo? - was louder than it had been before. That confirmed her suspicion - it wasn?t an echo at all, but rather some spirit just reciting the sutra in response to Shou.
It was close. Almost within grasping distance. It would take just a few more steps. Behind her, Shou pressed on with her chanting.
?How do I obtain a long-living body that the Vajra cannot harm??
Perhaps she was expecting an answer from the echo. Maybe a riddle - Buddhism was fond of those. Regardless, as Nazrin grabbed in front of her, the answer never quite came out.
?Tell me how to gain great stre-eeeh?!?
Nazrin?s hand grabbed at something, though given the lack of light she couldn?t tell exactly what. Given that it made no attempt to bite her hand off, she decided it was safe to pull her back towards her master. It struggled, letting off a light whining now and again as she pulled it along, but it did Nazrin no harm.
?...Gain great streeeeeeeh? That?s not how the sutra goes.?
Shou was outright confused as Nazrin returned from her trip into the darkness. She had ended her meditative posture, quickly dismissing the Vajra she had summoned and rising to her feet.
?Here?s your fallen monk, or whatever you said it was.?
Nazrin pushed forward whatever it was she had been pushing along. Now that she had the light of the pagoda to see with, Nazrin could easily make out her captive?s feminine figure. It was a youkai - very much alive, at that - in a pink dress with a white frill running along the bottom. Small green flower-shaped buttons ran along its length, and she was hastily doing them up in an attempt to make herself look more formal. She was still clinging to a broom in one hand, the sort made of solid bamboo. Her ears - what sort of ears were they? Nazrin hadn?t seem them before, but they reminded her of a bat?s wings more than anything.
?Uh. Hey there!?
The youkai smiled innocently as she finished fixing the last button on her dress. Her ears flapped a little in time with her grin, causing her dark green her to waver around in front of her face.
Shou had no words, but the look of sheer disappointment on her face said more than enough.
?So, uh. You?re the one responsible for this echoing, then.?
The girl nodded, still smiling. She seemed unafraid of Shou - a fellow disciple was no threat to her, after all. Nazrin made note of the fact that the youkai never looked back towards her - presumably hauling her over here had left the youkai worried about her.
?Well, what did you expect? I?m a yamabiko! It?s what I do! Do, do, do...?
As an example, she whispered the last word quieter and quieter every time. Her voice bounced off the cavern walls almost unnaturally, and came to Nazrin?s ears as if it was a genuine echo. She was impressed for all of half a second until she became aware that she?d been hauled up to this mountain for a false lead.
At that point she stopped being impressed, and started being angry.
?Shou, we?re leaving.?
Grabbing Shou?s pagoda, Nazrin started on a steady march back towards the entrance. Shou didn?t follow, more stunned by her actions than anything. Still, she?d have trouble getting back out herself without a light source, so she could hardly dally around.
?U-Uh. Sorry about all the hassle. You can find me at the Myouren Temple if you?re looking to discuss the sutras, miss...uh...?
?Kyouko! Kasodani Kyouko!?
Again, a cheerful smile as she gave her name across to a fellow disciple. Shou would?ve offered the same in return, but it was already getting difficult to see. She had to catch up to Nazrin before the pagoda?s light was gone entirely and she was tripping on every rock from here to the entrance.
?Toramaru Sho-hey, Nazrin! Wait for me!?
Shou dashed off towards the entrance again, leaving the mountain youkai by herself in the darkness. No matter - she?d grown used to this place, and the echoes of her own voice were enough to make her path clear. She spoke to herself as she made her journey back, a hand on her chin.
?Shouhei? That?s a weird name...?
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Hm, interesting interpretation. My knowledge of moon runes isn't very good, so I can't tell you if you've captured Kyouko's personality (or even what the hell she is) accurately, but I rather like it.
Also, Shouhei. :3 I like how she's so serious and yet so dopey.
I used this (http://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Kyouko_Kasodani) as a reference for what I had. Didn't have dialogue to work with because RACE TO BE FIRST, so. :|
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*Has no plan to ever play the demo*
Yeah, I already know very well that I'll want the full version, and I don't want to already be familiar with the first three stages; that'd make the first half of any runthrough a lot less entertaining.
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I have to say you got her pretty much spot on, as far as I can tell. Great job. :3
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Dear Residents of The Human Village Of Gensokyo,
I am writing to you in order to lodge a formal complaint. Apologies in advance if my language is stunted - I am bad at inexperienced with polite language, and I am being advised on my choice of words by my mistress.
As a proprietor of a public service for which I am not paid or commended, I understand that my opinions and thoughts are not held in particularly high regard. I learned this personally when, during one of my rounds at your village, I was asked if I would like a scratch behind the ears and a glass of milk. I accepted, but that?s not the point.
That said, there are a variety of lifestyle choices popular in the Human Village that make my job much harder than is necessary. I would be very grateful if you were to take some of my considerations into account the next time you think about chomping down on a full lamb chop.
Carrying corpses Post-expiration transport and disposal is already a strenuous occupation even before considering these complications. In the last six months, I have had to take three weeks off of duty because the heavy lifting has induced hernias. After exploring alternatives to no success (apparently you humans don?t like it when I take people into the underground one limb at a time) I have been left with no choice but to make offer a series of furious demands polite requests.
First: I would suggest a toll to be paid by the family for all instances of corpse-carrying post-expiration transport and disposal. Though I do my duty for kicks out of the goodness of my heart, with sufficient funding I could potentially purchase equipment that would make my occupation easier and safer. You expect me to pull corpses out of lakes by myself? Seriously?
Second: If possible, the corpse deceased should be brought to the edge of the Human Village for easy pickup and disposal. There has been a history of difficulty in trying to carry particularly fat generously weighted persons out of their houses when they?re wider than their goddamn doorways.
Third: Again, if possible, the dead guy deceased should be given a bath, or at least a good bit of washing before they are picked up by me a fully-qualified Post-Expiration Transporter, or PET for short. Though not necessary, this makes their departure much easier for the grieving family and means I don?t have to make the trip into the Blazing Fires wearing a nose peg and getting death glares from the oni.
Fourth, and finally: I would request that you pay further attention to your weight diets. I am not asking for you to fast or skip meals, but simply for you to stop stuffing your faces between every freaking meal count your calories more carefully. Even after death expiration, many human bodies maintain most of their weight, and it is hard to work when the deceased is obese overweight massive flabby huge gratuitously sized. There are many other benefits to this idea - maintaining control of your stomach diet will make you more athletic, more likely to help you get laid attract wholesome companions, and generally extend your life (as much as your tiny human lives can be extended, anyway).
To conclude, I would find my work much easier if you stopped being so goddamned fat larger than the cows you?re meant to be looking after wider than the radius of your average nuclear detonation so thoroughly spread ouFUCK IT SATORI-SAMA I?M SICK OF ALL THIS FANCY SHMANCY LANGUAGE
DEAR MASSIVE HUMANS
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF A VEGETABLE BEFORE
IF I THREW A POTATO AT YOUR FACE WOULD YOU DIE OF SOME SORT OF ALLERGIC REACTION, OR WOULD YOU DO WHAT YOU ALWAYS DO AND SWALLOW IT WHOLE WITHOUT EVEN TASTING IT
SERIOUSLY, HAVE YOU EVER TRIED CARRYING A BLOATED CORPSE SEVERAL MILES IN A CAT CART
DOES WONDERS FOR YOUR BONES, TRUST ME, MY CHIROPRACTOR SAYS I?LL NEVER STAND STRAIGHT AGAIN
AND IT?S THANKS TO ALL YOU HUMANS AND YOUR SWEETS AND YOUR CANDY AND YOUR SECOND AND THIRD AND FOURTH HELPINGS
I?D QUIT, BUT THERE?S ONLY ONE THING YOUR SPECIES IS ANY GOOD AT AND THAT?S DYING
WHERE ELSE AM I GOING TO FIND FUEL FOR THE FIRES OF HELL? EVERYTHING ELSE KEEPS COMING BACK TO LIFE, GODDAMMIT
SO HERE IS MY GODDAMN ULTIMATUM
IF YOU DIE, AND YOU ARE SO GODDAMN FAT I CAN?T CARRY YOU IN MY CART, I AM LEAVING YOU TO ROT
I?LL GIVE YOU THREE DAYS UNTIL THE LOCAL YOUKAI MAKE OFF WITH YOU AND STRIP THE MEAT FROM YOUR BONES
THAT?LL BE A NICE IMAGE FOR THE KIDS, WON?T IT
MIGHT BE A GOOD INCENTIVE TO PICK UP JOGGING OR TURN DOWN THAT THIRD SLAB OF STEAK, DON?T YOU AGREE
HOPEFULLY THAT GETS THE MESSAGE ACROSS BETTER THAN ANY OF THIS POLITICALLY CORRECT BULLSHIT EVER DID
Thank you for taking my ideas into consideration. I apologise for the inconvenience.
Yours sincerely,
Rin Kaenbyou
Post-Expiration Transporter
Earth Spirit Palace
Former Hell
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I wanted a break from all the dramatics that were flaring up in everything else I've been writing, before you ask. -_-
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAA
OOOOOOHH GAAAAAAAAAWD AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAHAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAA
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Pffahaha
Oh, Rin, you silly kitty :3
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Okay, that was good.
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Rin is now even more awesome.
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XD Ohmygodyes.
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Would you like some cheese with that whine Ms. Kaenbyou?
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Would you like some cheese with that wine Ms. Kaenbyou?
Nah, she just ate Nazrin
.
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Welp. I didn't get to be first to write a full-blown 10D story, but I still like this.
WARNING! SPOILERS FOR TH13 - TEN DESIRES AHEAD!
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?...And with that repayment scheme, you should be able to pay off the loan within a few months.?
Mamizou leaned backwards in her chair, hands behind her head with a smirk running across her face. She?d worked with these numbers for longer than she cared to remember, and she?d learned every intricacy of her art. The elderly man across the table slowly worked up a smile.
?Oh, that?s wonderful news. I was afraid paying for the funeral would be too much, but...? His eyes grew watery, and he rubbed at one in order to save face. ?I didn?t realise you would ask for so little in return.?
?As long as I?m turning a profit, I?m happy.? Mamizou leaned forward again, placing her hand over the man?s palm, pressing down lightly. ?And besides, your wife was one of my mother?s best friends. I?d never be able to live with myself if I robbed her husband for loving her so much.?
The man nodded, his hand curling up beneath Mamizou?s. He looked her in the eyes, past the frames of her glasses, and smiled again.
?You have your mother?s eyes, child. And her kindness, as well.?
?Thanks. I?m sure she?d have loved to hear that,? Mamizou replied, her voice trembling slightly. She gripped her client?s hand for a moment, only letting go when he rose from his seat. He bowed towards her once in thanks, then made his way out of the building.
Mamizou sighed.
?This charade has become somewhat ridiculous.?
She could go back to the old dialect now, the speech she?d always felt more familiar with. She?d never liked how the language had changed over the years - the new dialects kids spoke with nowadays felt impure, basic in comparison to the old tongue. She?d get awkward stares from the people of Sado if she spoke like this in public, though - young women weren?t supposed to speak like grandmothers.
She stood up, pressing out the creases in her dress with her hands. How many years had she spent in this office? How many times had she repainted the walls, replaced the furniture, added in the latest high-tech gadget that all the kids were squealing over? There was nothing left of the old shack she?d built all those years ago, with the name FUTATSUIWA FINANCES written lovingly in bright red paint. Now it was all about professional sign makers and internet presence.
Her eyes fell on the computer at her desk. She despised the thing - it was invaluable, but it felt so mechanical, so predictable, so dead. That was how the whole world felt nowadays, when she thought about it. Science marched on, and all the world?s little mysteries were being solved one by one.
Where did that leave her? Wherever it was, she was liking it less and less with every passing day. This life was becoming difficult to maintain, what with the rise of photography and digital images. Eventually someone would catch on to her secret, and-
?Ah??
The chimes at her front door pulled Mamizou out of her thoughts. A customer? Back to playing the youth, then. She was skipping to the entrance before the man had even opened the door.
?Morning! Welcome to Futatsuiwa Finances, running in the family for 300 years! How can I help you to-?
No. Something was wrong about this customer. At first, Mamizou couldn?t put the feeling into words - nothing about the customer seemed out of the ordinary. He was getting on in his age, but then again the elderly were the largest age group in Sado by far. He dressed well but not sharply, in a suit that had seen better days, and he was fiddling around with a series of financial papers covered in threatening red ink. She had seen a million customers like this over the years.
That was when the realisation struck her. This customer was too ordinary, too generic, too run-of-the-mill. There were no quirks, no unusual traits, absolutely nothing that Mamizou wasn?t expecting. She was seeing exactly what she expected to see.
Which meant...no, it couldn?t be. That had been so long ago, and there was no reason for her to visit now. Even so, she couldn?t help but pull her head around, looking behind the man for that telltale sign. For a moment she even considered asking him to take his suit off, but she found what she was looking for before she had to resort to that measure.
A black snake was coiled around the back of his neck. At first glance, it looked like a tattoo, but Mamizou caught its tail slithering left and right. That confirmed her suspicions right away.
?...Nue?? The name came off of Mamizou?s mouth with difficulty, like it had grown rusty from decades without use. The man flinched for a moment in response to her call, then smiled. The voice that came from his mouth did not belong to a man.
?Damn. All these years, and I still can?t fool you.?
The snake vanished, and moments later the illusion of an elderly man faded away. Standing in its place was a young woman in a short black dress, with a set of miscoloured wing-like appendages popping out of her back. She was still smiling, but it was a smile with a hint of disappointment behind it.
Mamizou needed a moment to respond. She?d grown so used to this new life that it felt almost alien to have a youkai right in her face. Eventually she found her voice, dropping the act once again.
??Tis a futile gesture to trick a trickster, Nue. And there?s no harm in offering a simple ?hello?.?
Mamizou locked the door behind her old companion, then made her way around the room to make sure every window was closed and blinded. Nue helped herself to the seat opposite the desk, unable to sit back properly thanks to her wings.
?When I found out you were working in finance of all things, I had to pick my jaw off the floor,? Nue said with a chuckle. ?Whatever happened to the mightiest tanuki in Sado? Remember that time you scared those kids senseless by bringing the cave paintings to life??
Mamizou frowned. She remembered them all too well, the olden days when she?d frighten and help the humans of Sado in equal measure. Now her prankster days were nothing but a memory, never to be repeated again.
?If only it were still so simple, Nue. Surely you know how the world has changed over the years? I fear we live in an age of skeptics. When it became clear none would fall for my tricks, I decided to simply merge in. You youths have a saying about it - ?If you can?t beat them, join them?, if I recall correctly.?
She closed the last window, making sure that no-one could see inside. Only the dim bulb above Nue?s head lit the room now. It was time to drop this disguise.
For a moment, she almost forgot how to return to her original form. She?d acted as a human for so long that sometimes she fell for her own story. Yet as she tapped into that inner reservoir of magic, that hidden potential she?d left untouched for so long, she felt the memories rushing back.
A pair of ears popped out from the top of Mamizou?s head, brown to match the colour of her hair. A long striped tail slid out from behind her, and she gave it a wriggle like she was brushing off dust. It was refreshing to be able to take on this form again, and she took a moment to appreciate herself in the mirror.
?Every generation makes it more difficult to maintain this disguise. Pray, have you any idea how difficult it is to claim to be your own daughter? It requires more effort and magic than any of the illusions I performed in my youth.? She grabbed at a nearby coat hanger. ?When you talk to your mother knowing full well she is an inanimate object, you begin to realise how low you have fallen.?
Nue?s expression didn?t change much. In fact, she seemed outright surprised by Mamizou?s plight. Mamizou was about to ask how Nue was so unaware of this when the youkai answered the question for her.
?Sorry, didn?t really notice. I was sorta napping for a century or three, and when I woke up I was in that new-fangled Gensokyo place.?
Mamizou?s ears twitched. She had heard vague whispers about Gensokyo, but news never made it to Sado without a few lies thrown in. Her curiosity piqued, she sat down at the desk and leaned forward.
?Gensokyo? Yakumo?s last stronghold of youkai and magic, correct??
?Something like that,? Nue replied with a shrug of the shoulders. ?Hard as hell to get in or out - I had to disguise myself as a 5000-yen bill on top of a donation box and wait until someone on the outside world stole me. Real pretty place, though, and it?s pretty much nothing but youkai.?
Mamizou nodded along as Nue spoke, something warm rising up in her heart. She felt herself falling back into the good old days again, the days when youkai could roam freely and do as they wished. The thought of a nation where the old ways still held true was enticing, but she would have to leave those thoughts for later. For now, she had a guest to entertain.
?So, if this Gensokyo is so idyllic,? she said, pouring Nue a glass of sake from the bottle on her desk, ?what reason could you have to leave? Are you, perchance, looking to talk this veteran into an early retirement??
Nue didn?t reply right away, staring downwards into the glass of sake. That was Mamizou?s clue that this wasn?t just a casual reunion. She poured herself a glass, thinking she was going to need it very soon.
?Actually...? Nue started, biting her lip, ?I wanted to ask for your help.?
Mamizou smirked. ?Ah, so Gensokyo still functions under a human economy? Fear not, for my rates are quite genial, especially for a close friend like yourself-?
?We need you to take care of Toyosatomimi.?
Nue blurted out her request at once, cutting Mamizou short. The tanuki blinked once, took a deep breath, then calmly placed her glasses on the desk.
Then she took the most pressing action necessary, and downed her glass of sake in a single gulp.
?I hope you haven?t come all this way for a simple jest,? she said as she placed the glass down again. ?Miko Toyosatomimi is dead, and she has been for centuries. Don?t tell me you have fallen for another prankster, Nue.?
?Spirits were coming from the netherworld, the heavens, everywhere to see her come back,? Nue said, her voice deadly serious. ?It?s her, for sure.?
Mamizou frowned. She poured herself another drink. Nue had yet to touch hers.
?So perhaps Gensokyo has been visited by a saint. What harm does that cause you? Would Buddhists not see youkai as allies rather than enemies??
Nue shook her head violently. ?She?s not a Buddhist, Mamizou. She never was. All of it - the Mononobe, the Soga, the whole damn crusade - she set all of that up for power. She?s embraced the Tao, and she?s so powerful that every youkai in Gensokyo?s terrified of her.?
?Even yourself?? Mamizou sipped at her second shot. She could be a heavy drinker when the time called for it, and this sounded like the sort of situation she?d want to take on with a little Dutch courage.
?I?ve been holing up with the Buddhist monk that?d been trying to seal her,? Nue answered, giving her glass a shake and watching the ripples intently. ?Miko hates Buddhists, and the Buddhists love the youkai. Put two and two together, and every youkai in Gensokyo?s got a reason to sleep with one eye open tonight.?
Mamizou sped up her drinking, chugging her glass. It tasted bitter on her tongue, like most cheap sake did. She didn?t like where this conversation was headed.
?So what do you expect me to do? I?m a memento of a bygone era, not some prodigal magician. My glory days are long since behind me, and even then challenging a saint would have been a challenge.?
Nue?s face fell, her expression growing desperate. She pushed forward, spilling sake onto the desk.
?But your name still means something to the youkai. You?ve got influence, respect. You can lead them, and you might be able to convince Miko not to press an attack.?
Her hand closed over Mamizou?s, unnaturally warm. It squeezed tight, and for a moment Mamizou swore she saw tears in Nue?s eyes.
?Please, Mamizou. I owe these monks a favour. I can?t go back empty handed and watch Miko slaughter them all. I need you right now...?
Mamizou couldn?t help but feel her heart shudder at the sight of an old friend trembling in fear. She was asking for too much, Mamizou told herself. Why would a saint bow down to a washed up tanuki, of all people? This plan was going to fail, for sure.
And yet...she sort of wanted to go along with it.
Maybe it was the alcohol getting to her head. Maybe she was too old and just looking for a brave way to die. Or maybe, just maybe, she was realising how ridiculous this new life of hers was, and how much she wanted to go back to the old ways. Maybe this would go wrong, and maybe it would get her killed if Miko really was as aggressive as Nue claimed she was.
But she would rather die a youkai than live a human.
Mamizou hung her head in contemplation for over a minute. For every second she thought without an answer, Nue?s grip on her hand grew tighter until Mamizou felt her circulation cutting off. At last, the tanuki looked back up with a slightly tipsy grin.
?You are a cruel girl, playing with an old woman?s heart like that. I can?t be expected to listen to sense in the presence of such a pretty face.?
Nue?s face shifted to surprise, then to elation. ?You mean...you mean you?ll...? She looked down, realising the damage she was doing to Mamizou?s hand. She snapped back, her voice shuddering out of nerves rather than fear now. ?Oh, sorry. Got a little carried away, is all.?
?No need to apologise,? Mamizou said as she stood up. She shook her hand. It still worked. Good enough. She stretched, walking into a nearby closet. ?I will have to make some preparations before we depart. I have debtors whose loans I will need to clear. I doubt credit cards serve as legal tender in Gensokyo, so my money will be useless anyway.?
?Huh?? Nue tilted her head, seeing Mamizou?s tail popping out of the doorway. ?You aren?t gonna come back to Sado after you?re done??
The tanuki continued her rummaging through the closet, picking out various belongings. Some of her old vintage sake bottles - no way was she going to leave those behind - and a book of promissory notes in case there was any business to be had in Gensokyo.
?My sincerest apologies,? she yelled out into the main room. ?I thought for a moment you would have appreciated my company.?
Nue allowed herself a little chuckle beneath her breath. ?The temple already has a mouse, a tiger, and they just took in one of those mountain youkai the other day. I figure we have room to keep one more pet.?
Mamizou grinned. She couldn?t remember the last time a conversation had made her feel so happy. She felt genuine again, like she was really herself rather than living the lie she?d held to for 300 years. She kept burrowing through her old belongings, looking for a few mementos to hold on to.
?Out of interest, Nue, how did you come to Sado? I would hope you didn?t opt for your typical ?mysterious flying object? routine.?
She wasn?t able to see Nue?s reaction, but the tiny ?eep? that came from outside the closet was proof enough that she?d hit the nail on the head.
?Perhaps you should try something more subtle for your return journey?? Mamizou said, with the tone of a disappointed mother. ?An eagle, mayhaps, or a porpoise.?
That brought about a loud moan from Nue. ?But those forms are so booooring...?
?Yet they are practical. Do you know the extent of technology outside of the border? No doubt there will be dozens of videos of you scouring the internet right now.?
Picking the last of her belongings out of the closet, Mamizou saw Nue slumped in her chair with a bright red face. The girl was ambitious, Mamizou thought to herself, but she had never learned restraint. That was why she?d taken so many beatings over the years, and why Mamizou had needed to nurse her back to health so many times.
The tanuki shifted back into her human form, her ears and tail fading away like they?d never existed. She hastily wrote up a note saying that she was tired of Sado and wanted to try life on the mainland, and that all debts were to be considered repaid and cleared. She travelled light, taking only one bag of belongings with her - and almost all of that was sake for the journey.
The snake on Nue?s neck had reformed, so now the rest of Sado would see her as whatever they expected - most likely, an elderly man who Mamizou was discussing business with. Now that Mamizou knew what she was looking for, though, the illusion had lost its effect. Neither of them really minded.
?Well, then,? she said, holding one hand out for Nue and unlocking the door with the other. ?Shall we pretend to be young again??
?Hey,? Nue replied as she shoved the door open with her free hand. ?Who said anything about pretending??
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I really like Mamizou as a concept for a character. Favourite 10D character by far, though I've been trying to think of a way to play with Miko...
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Age is just a number, anyways, Nue! You tell her!
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This is a pretty awesome backstory-dealy. :3
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Welp. The image got stuck in my head, and I had to write it. Just another day at the office, really.
[This is not really connected to TEiPW canon. It's been a while since I wrote Satori, and my image of her has probably changed a lot since then anyway.]
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Obligation was something Satori hadn?t worked her head around quite yet.
She wasn?t used to visitors, let alone friends. The demons of the underground still feared her, giving the palace as wide a berth as they could manage. She was fine with that - she thought the oni were a brutish race anyway, and she was more than willing to let them keep their distance. She never even bothered to lock the front door on the basis that no-one ever tried to break in anyway.
So when the kappa girl had kicked the door open without a care in the world, Satori hadn?t really been sure how to react.
??Ey! You?re that satori girl, right??
The uninvited guest stepped in without waiting for an answer, two large boxes held under her arms. Satori?s first instinct was to read her thoughts, looking for any sign of aggression, but all she found was a cheerful curiosity. The kappa looked her up and down, stopping in particular to look at Satori?s third eye. She carefully put the boxes on the floor, one hand already fidgeting. Satori caught the idea forming in the girl?s head before she could act on it.
?Please don?t touch it,? she said, stepping backwards. ?It?s rather sensitive.?
The kappa?s eyes widened, and she offered a small bow in apology. The hat almost fell off her head as she leaned down, and only quick reflexes stopped it from coming off entirely.
?Agh, I keep forgetting about that!? she muttered to herself. ?Manners can be a matter of life and death sometimes...? Satori pondered her meaning for a moment, but as usual the answer came to her through the stream of consciousness the girl was giving off.
Why do we need the water bowls, anyway? What if I just put a lid on mine under the hat? Then I wouldn?t have to worry about the water spilling, even if I?m upside-down!
Satori nodded along, as if the girl was talking to her in person. Years of holding conversations with her pets had left her struggling to tell where conversation started and thought ended.
?Surely someone has attempted that before??
?Probably, but I just need to do it better. I figure I can-? It took the kappa a moment to realise she hadn?t put all of her thoughts into words. She gave Satori a small round of applause, putting on a wry grin. ?You really are as good as they say, aren?t you??
Satori shrugged. ?It hardly requires any talent. It?s just who I am.? She took another look inside the girl?s head, intent on ending this conversation as soon as possible. She found most youkai to be poor conversation partners. ?So I?m to understand you bear a gift as thanks for letting you observe Utsuho for a while??
?Oh?? The kappa looked down at the boxes on the floor again, her mind jumping back to life. ?Oh, yeah! Yeah, this is sort of a thank you for letting us study your nuclear reactor.?
?She has a name,? Satori growled.
?Yeah, but she?s also got a control rod for an arm. One of these things means more to me than the other.?
That did nothing to impress Satori, and she continued with her disapproving glare at the kappa. Perhaps she would dig a little deeper into the girl?s head, find some material that would make her cringe as payback. She hit an old childhood memory, and cruel satisfaction flooded her mind.
?So, am I to understand you tried to invent a machine to stop you from wetting the bed??
The kappa just about leapt out of her dress.
?Wha?! How did you-? She made the conclusion herself before she finished the sentence. She started stepping backwards towards the door, lacking all of the bravado she?d shown on the way in. Maybe she felt weaker when she didn?t have her mechanical gizmos right beside her.
?OK, OK, I?m leaving! Just don?t tell anyone about that, okay?!?
The kappa was polite enough to close the door behind her on the way out. Satori heard her squealing as she ran for the tunnel back to the surface. These incidents really were not helping with her public image, Satori thought to herself.
The thought passed quickly. Animals wouldn?t judge her based on hearsay, and frankly she didn?t care much about any other creature Gensokyo had to offer.
The boxes lay on the floor, both wrapped in elegant bow ties. This was probably a formal offering from some higher authority in the kappa race as thanks for her co-operation. Satori was only just curious enough to open the box, undoing the ribbon carefully. It was just as well Rin wasn?t nearby, or she?d have torn these packages apart the moment she saw them.
One box was heavier than the other, she quickly discovered. She decided to leave that one until later, opting for the lighter box first. There was a single piece of clothing inside, and as she touched it she felt the unnatural clinginess of something artificial. It wasn?t cotton, or silk, or any sort of material she?d even seen clothes made from. It felt cold to the touch.
She pulled the outfit out of the box in full. It was meant to cover her entire body, offering only holes for her hands, feet and head. A zip at the back brought the whole thing apart so that she could step into it, but the suit looked too tight for her to wear while she was still clothed. It seemed to have been made to her size exactly. Well, at least that explained why Rin had been worrying about ?giving her details to the kappa? earlier. She didn?t understand why her pets still tried to keep secrets from her even when they knew she could read their minds.
Her curiosity definitely aroused now, Satori opened the second box to find an assortment of items that had little meaning to her. Two plastic shoes that looked like ducks? feet, something made of rubber that was meant to go over her eyes, a curved tube with a mouthpiece at the end, and a metal cylinder that weighed more than all the rest of it put together. Another tube ran out from the tank, ending in another large mouthpiece. She tested it, biting around the grips made for her teeth and blowing into the device. Nothing much seemed to happen. She tried inhaling instead. There was air inside, but it had a strange aftertaste that made it seem about as natural as the rest of this mechanical nonsense.
As she spat the device out, she lifted up the tank. It was incredibly heavy given that it apparently contained nothing but air, to the point where Satori struggled to lift it. She found a small pamphlet underneath the cylinder, written in floral handwriting that confirmed her suspicions of this being a formal gift.
Dear Satori Komeiji,
Many thanks once again for your co-operation in our continuing scientific efforts to determine the source of the Moriya Shrine?s nuclear power.
Again, no mention of Utsuho by name. These kappa were starting to get on her nerves. Never mind their habit of using a dozen words where one would suffice.
We present to you as a humble offering this little piece of kappa technology. Recently refined and perfected by some of our most accomplished inventors, it is designed to allow any youkai to experience the underwater world of the kappa.
From what she?d heard of the kappa, ?refined and perfected? meant ?blatantly stolen from beyond the border?. Next came a 5-page explanation on how to actually use all of this equipment, written in condescending language that a child could understand. She would have appreciated it if the refusal to call Utsuho by name hadn?t made it clear the kappa didn?t care in the slightest. This was a gift being offered to her out of obligation, not out of gratitude.
She?d been tempted to grab both boxes and throw them into the blazing fires, along with all the corpses Rin had been collecting. To hell with gratitude. The whole thing was a barely veiled insult to her intelligence, and she had half a mind to stop the kappa from stepping into the underground ever again.
But three days later the boxes were still sitting by the main entrance, their contents untouched. Rin had made off with the ribbons long ago, but after a failed attempt to bite into the tank she?d left the rest of the ?gift? alone.
It was this damned obligation that was holding her back, Satori thought to herself. She felt like she was supposed to use the gift, at least once. Even if the whole thing was just the kappas? way of mocking her.
Eventually, she came to a compromise. She?d go for a dive like they wanted her to, then write them a jarringly polite letter noting every complaint she had about the device. That would even the odds slightly.
?Rin, I?m going out for a while.?
Satori lifted the boxes with a heave, carrying them under both arms like the kappa had done bringing them here. She heard the pattering of tiny feet behind her as a cat ran between her legs. She blinked, and as quickly as that Rin Kaenbyou was lying beneath her in her humanoid form. Her face was twisted in a look of shock.
?Master, am I hearing things? You?re going out??
Satori nodded, trying to save face. The last thing she needed was for her pets to know she was giving in to this outside pressure.
?It?s something personal, Rin. I?d rather not talk about it.?
She stepped over Rin, keeping her expression blank, but as she reached the door she became painfully aware that these boxes were heavier than she?d thought. She dropped them, looking back for a moment, before finally sighing in defeat.
?Actually, you had better come with me. I need to find a lake...?
-----
At first Satori wasn?t sure if getting out of the underground would be trivial. She had garnered quite the reputation among the oni, and there were probably plenty of unruly youkai who wanted to claim her scalp. She decided against stepping through the old hell?s side alleys - they meant she was less likely to be noticed, but they also meant that if she was unlucky enough to be jumped there wouldn?t be any way out.
Her steps were quiet as she passed through the main streets, the box blocking most of her vision. She was basically following Rin?s lead, looking down at her feet and matching her step. The kasha was dealing with the weight much more gracefully than Satori had, and though she never said a word Satori could hear the pride in her thoughts as clear as day.
Soon enough they were in the Drunkards? District, named for the array of bars that ran across it. Alcohol was the only business in the old hell that turned a profit, and it was rare to see these streets so much as half-full. Regrettably, today was no exception, and Satori had to follow behind as Rin shoved past the demons blocking their way.
?Heads up, guys. Evil mind-reader comin? through.?
Satori cringed. The box had been blocking her face until now, and for a while she?d almost thought she would get away unseen. Now that Rin had mentioned her some of the oni were turning in her direction. Satori pressed her face against the box, hoping that they?d either not recognise her or not care.
?Shit! It?s Komeiji, guys!?
Oh, who was she kidding? This always happened when she tried to leave the palace.
The thoughts of the oni came together as a mass of ideas in her head. She?d spent so long around them that she?d learned to ignore them for the most part. They became the static noise that she had to listen to every time she ventured outside.
Static noise that was quickly shifting to terror.
?Shit, shit, shit! I?m not letting her hear a thing about me!?
?Aw, man, if she tells my wife that I- no, can?t think about the chick I met last night! Can?t think about her!?
?She can?t know about the stash I stole from that asshole across the street! He doesn?t even know I?m the one who took it! It?s the perfect crime, goddammit!?
The crowd split into two, a pathway opening up for Satori and her pet. She hung her head low as she travelled through, the news passing across the sea of oni within minutes. The Drunkard?s District took up almost half the city block, so she got to spend more than enough time hearing the frenzied thoughts of the frightened masses.
It was a relief to her senses when they stepped into the tunnel towards the surface, and the voices in her head finally fell silent. She stopped for a moment on the wooden bridge that linked the surface to the underground, placing the box at her feet and leaning on the railing.
?Rin, was that really necessary??
?Nope,? the kasha answered as she twirled around, ?but damn, was it fun to watch. Didn?t you look? All those big manly men squirming in terror because of one girl!?
Satori frowned. ?Someday, one of those oni might find the nerve to bring a club to my head so his secrets stay hidden. Do you really think it?s a good idea to give them more chances, Rin??
Rin?s tails wrapped around each other as her ears drooped. For a moment, it looked as if she was going to leap off the bridge into the river out of shame.
Wait. The river?
Satori was struck by the idea. She looked down into the stream beneath her, its pale green waters lapping off into the distance. It was surprisingly clear, and much deeper than she?d originally assumed.
?Rin. Where does this river lead, exactly??
Even before Rin had started on her answer, Satori was already opening the box she?d been carrying. She pulled out the rubbery outfit the kappa had given her as a gift. Apparently, they called it a wetsuit - which seemed quite paradoxical, given that it was meant to keep its owner dry.
?Eh? Well, uh, can?t say I know...think it ended in some sorta underground reservoir or something. No-one?s ever really looked.?
An unexplored area of the underground? Now she was getting interested. She looked up out of the tunnel, towards the surface. It was still a long trek before they would step out into the sunlight. Why bother if she had her testing ground right here?
?Rin, get the gear ready for me,? Satori said as she walked into a distant corner of the cavern, away from prying eyes. ?There?s a manual that should explain everything you need to know.?
Rin tilted her head as Satori walked away from her. This was the first time she?d seen the contents of the box since that one attempt she?d made to eat them, and their purpose was something she?d never cared about. She would figure it out - it would be hard not to when the kappa had laid out the instructions to the letter.
When she found a corner so dark that she could barely see her own hand in front of her face, Satori was content that she wouldn?t be seen. She undressed hastily, leaving her clothes in a neat pile at her side. Unzipping the back of the wetsuit, she stepped into it, feeling the rubbery material cling to her skin. The hardest challenge was finding a way to put it on over her third eye, but eventually she managed to slip it and its tendrils out from within. There was no space for them under the wetsuit, and the water wouldn?t irritate her third eye anyway.
She couldn?t do the zip back up from here, though. She walked back to the bridge, holding her clothes under one arm and laying them on the bridge next to Orin. The cat was currently fiddling with the tank, turning various knobs to set the pressure properly. Satori watched her movements, just to make sure she was keeping to the instructions. Everything seemed in order as the kasha stood up, brushing her hands together.
?Rin. Get that zip for me, would you?? Satori asked, pointing to her back as she sat down. She pulled on the fins as Rin tended to the wetsuit. Satori caught a glint of worry running through the kasha?s thoughts, frowning. ?If you?re concerned, you should at least tell me.?
?I know, I know,? Rin moaned. ?But do you even know what you?re doing? What if these diving thingies don?t work? What if you get trapped down there??
?I am the master of the Palace of the Earth Spirits. If there?s one thing I won?t accept, it?s not knowing about the underground I live in.? Satori spoke with total conviction as she brought the mask over her eyes. ?That, and I?m not willing to owe a favour to those damned kappa if I don?t have to.?
Rin?s concern never faded, but a feeling of understanding took precedence in her mind. She understood that this was something Satori was going to do, one way or another, and she at least had the grace not to get in her master?s way. She was a good pet, Satori thought to herself as she strapped the tank on. It was as heavy as she remembered, and she gave up on standing with it, sitting on the bridge instead.
?Tell me, Rin. How do I look??
The kasha?s eyes fell on her master, looking her up and down nervously. The words didn?t come to her mouth, but Satori caught the thoughts easily enough.
?I look like an idiot, you say? Excellent. Remind me to bring that up when I write my formal complaint to the kappa.?
She slipped under the railing of the bridge, sitting on the edge overlooking the river. The drop was less than a foot, so small that Satori?s feet were dipping into the water. She bit down on the mouthpiece, taking a few test breaths. Still had the same clinical aftertaste. That meant it was probably working.
She took a deep breath, and pushed herself off of the bridge.
As she splashed down into the river Satori was amazed by how clear the water was. The mask was doing its job, and as she made a few practice kicks she found the fins were giving her a good bit of power as well. There was no stinging cold from the water thanks to the wetsuit. That left only the tank, and as Satori took another breath from it she almost hoped that it wouldn?t work.
It did.
Dammit. How am I supposed to complain if nothing is broken?
She surfaced quickly, giving Rin a quick thumbs-up so it was clear she was fine. Rin offered her a little smile back in return, smirking.
?Don?t have too much fun, now.?
Satori would have offered a rebuttal if she didn?t have a mouthpiece stuck in her mouth. She slithered back under the water, letting the current guide her down through the river. Now that she?d gone so far as to actually dive in, there was no reason not to go all the way.
She?d find something to complain about. She just had to look carefully...
-----
The small lanterns hanging over the bridge weren?t much use to Satori as she swam further in. The space around her grew tighter, and the air pocket above her came to an end. Now she was totally dependent on the tank to stay alive, but she comforted herself with the knowledge that if she happened to die the kappa would never hear the end of it.
Her eyes grew used to the lack of light after a few minutes. In the underground, a light source was usually a luxury, and most youkai had learned to work without it. It was an inherent magic, but in the satori it had never been particularly strong. Satori could see far ahead enough that she wasn?t swimming into walls, but she couldn?t do much more than that.
The tunnels twisted and turned in unnatural ways, as if they had a life of their own. There were small side paths, but nothing that really pulled her away from the main passageway. She ran a hand along the wall, long since run smooth by the water?s flow. Even now the current was helping her along, leading her to wherever the water happened to be pooling.
Satori felt almost numb as she swam further in. Not from the cold - the wetsuit was still protecting her from that. More than anything she wasn?t used to the silence. There wasn?t a single living creature nearby for her third eye to pick up. The only sound she could make out was her own breath, and the gurgles as her bubbles slipped away from her.
It was a welcome change, especially after the barrage of oni she?d had to walk through earlier. Her third eye had closed slightly in relief, as if it had finally been given a chance to sleep. She lazed along in the water, letting the current do most of the work.
She noticed that at some point the tunnel had bent downwards, leading her deeper underground. Now she really had no idea where she was going - this was taking her well beneath the underground, and given that the water was still cold on her face she couldn?t be anywhere near the blazing fires. So where did that leave?
Curiosity drove her on as she drifted further into the tunnel. She?d found books in the palace, left by their former owners, explaining the layout of hell in its entirety. It was made of nine circles, it said, each to house a different sin. None of these circles had been seen since, though - when the site of hell had changed, almost all of the architecture had been magically moved along with it. Only the remnants of the blazing fires remained, and they had only been reignited in recent years thanks to Utsuho.
But the stories had also mentioned rivers running through the former hell. Was this one of them, perhaps? She had no way of knowing for sure unless she followed this path to the end. She continued onwards, looking for any sign that something was unusual about this cavern.
She found one soon afterward, as the walls around her became much less natural. Jagged crystals poked out of them, each giving off its own eerie light. A chill, stronger than that of the water, began to run across her body. Without the wetsuit she would have frozen to death for sure. She folded her arms, keeping her bare hands safe from the cold, letting the current carry her around.
At last the tunnel turned upward, and Satori swam up to follow it. She?d emerged in the basin of a lake, its water impossibly pure and unspeakably cold. The surface was covered in ice, save for a small hole in its centre. Satori felt the water?s grip tightening on her, and the chance to step out of it was one she couldn?t refuse.
?Haaah...?
She spat out the mouthpiece as she surfaced, pulling herself onto the ice. She?d been swimming for a good twenty minutes, and she wasn?t used to physical exertion. She fell backwards onto the frozen surface of the lake, the ice easily supporting her weight.
What she saw above her forced her to look twice to make sure she wasn?t seeing things.
?Are those...stars...??
Satori pulled off the mask, blinking once, twice, three times. Her eyes needed a moment to grow accustomed to the bright lights, and the shimmering glints above her made her think she?d made her way to the surface. But that was impossible - she?d been diving deeper, not rising higher. As her vision came into focus, she found that it wasn?t starlight after all - the entire ceiling was made of brilliant crystals, like the ones that had been growing in the tunnel.
Along the walls, she saw human shapes carved into the stone, arms reaching out as if for mercy. Names were written alongside each marking to name its former resident, but they had all been moved along with the rest of the old hell. The names were written in a language Satori neither knew nor cared for.
Satori began to walk across the lake?s surface, struggling with both the weight of the tank and the cumbersome fins on her feet. The crystal ran across the whole ceiling, and the shapes in the walls all pointed towards the centre. It was only looking back from the surface that she could see that the hole she?d emerged from was itself shaped like a torso, as if someone had been encased within it beforehand.
That fact brought the realisation to her.
?This is...the ninth circle??
The books had mentioned it. She?d made her way through the river of lamentation, and emerged in the frozen lake that held the greatest traitors of humanity. Somehow she had managed to find her way to the ninth circle of hell - or at least, where it had been once. Any sign of the ruler of the old hell and his prisoners was long since gone, but the brilliant ice had been left behind. It was colder than cold, and even above the surface Satori had to hug herself to stay warm.
It was worth it, though, for the crystals. They were ice, Satori assumed, but magically enchanted ice that would never melt. As an unintended side effect, the light danced across them beautifully, a dozen rainbows running across the ceiling at once. Perhaps it was an ironic punishment, and the prisoners were never allowed to witness the wonder that hung right above their heads.
She wasn?t sure how long she sat there, staring upwards into the shimmering lights. She forgot herself, entranced by the beauty and the silence of the place. She was alone and content, all of her wants and needs forgotten.
The rumbling of her stomach brought her back to the reality of the matter.
?...That?s right. I can?t stay here, can I??
It must have been at least half an hour by now, maybe longer. Rin would be worried sick if she didn?t come back soon. Satori braced herself for the oncoming cold as she stepped back into the water. The return journey would be harder now that she was fighting the current, but she had more than enough air left in the tank to make it back to the bridge.
She offered the ceiling one last look before she dove under the water. The lights seemed to fall from above, like the room itself was crying at her departure.
Not to worry, Satori told herself. She?d be back. Even if she had to dress like a moron to do it.
-----
?Nyaaah...?
Rin paced up and down the bridge, her tails swishing left and right. She?d had no way to keep track of time, and every second felt like it lasted an age. Disaster scenarios played out in her head on endless repeat, and she had half a mind to dive in after her in case her master needed rescuing. How hard could it be to stop breathing for half an hour, after all?
?If anything has happened to Master Satori, I?m gonna tear that kappa a new one, I swear! I?ll...I?ll...?
Rin?s vow of revenge was cut off when she saw bubbles popping up from the water. Her heart rose as her master?s form came into view, and as she popped out from the water Rin had to resist the urge to jump off the bridge and hug her right then.
?Sorry for taking so long,? Satori said as she spat out the mouthpiece, hauling herself onto shore. ?I got a little distracted down there.?
Rin was at her side in a moment, offering her master a towel. She?d run down to the palace and picked it up while Satori was diving, figuring her master would need it when she surfaced. Satori accepted it gratefully, drying her hair as she threw her mask to the side.
?So, are we gonna file that complaint tonight?? Rin said with a hint of anticipation. ?I know a lotta words that sound innocent but are really really offensive to the kappa. Y?know, words like-?
?I?m not going to complain.?
Rin?s arms rose to her sides. ?Wha? But you said that we were gonna-?
?It was worth it, in the end,? Satori interrupted with a smile. ?Maybe you?ll get to see it some day.? She pulled the rest of the gear off, leaving on only the wetsuit, and dumped the lot in the box they?d came from. She threw her clothes into the box the wetsuit had come in, and started hauling it back down the tunnel. ?Now we?d better be getting back. I feel like making myself something fiery for dinner tonight.?
Rin could only look on stupefied as her master strolled down the cavern back home, a definite spring in her step. What had she seen down there that had changed her mind so suddenly? She was wearing that knowing smirk of hers, the one she always wore when she knew a secret she wasn?t supposed to.
All of those answers could wait a while, though. For now, her master was getting ahead of her.
?H-Hey! Wait for me!?
Rin grabbed the box, running with it as she made to catch up with Satori. She had all sorts of questions, and the strange feeling her master wasn?t going to be giving much in the way of answers. How was that fair? No-one could keep a secret from her, and yet she was allowed to hide whatever she wanted?
Not that it mattered that much. When it came down to it, Rin was a creature of basic pleasures. She liked bowls of fresh milk, naps in the afternoon and scratches behind the ears, and the master gave her all of that whenever she wanted it. If a few secrets was the price she had to pay for that, she?d pay it three times over.
Rin only noticed she was smiling when she?d just about caught up with Satori, moving in front of her as a makeshift bodyguard. It was time for them to make their way past the smelly, violent hordes of oni again.
And as long as it meant being next to her master, Rin couldn?t help but look forward to it.
-
Cirno, that girl who manages to appear in every story, even if she isn't directly there.
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferno_%28Dante%29#Ninth_Circle_.28Treachery.29
coincidence, really
Man, Satori's certainly a pretty big ass in this one :V
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rou have I told you how much i love you
"Moving on" was such a fucking beauty. Why the fuck have I not found this thread yet?
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Dear Residents of The Human Village Of Gensokyo,
I am writing to you in order to lodge a formal complaint. Apologies in advance if my language is stunted - I am bad at inexperienced with polite language, and I am being advised on my choice of words by my mistress.
As a proprietor of a public service for which I am not paid or commended, I understand that my opinions and thoughts are not held in particularly high regard. I learned this personally when, during one of my rounds at your village, I was asked if I would like a scratch behind the ears and a glass of milk. I accepted, but that?s not the point.
That said, there are a variety of lifestyle choices popular in the Human Village that make my job much harder than is necessary. I would be very grateful if you were to take some of my considerations into account the next time you think about chomping down on a full lamb chop.
Carrying corpses Post-expiration transport and disposal is already a strenuous occupation even before considering these complications. In the last six months, I have had to take three weeks off of duty because the heavy lifting has induced hernias. After exploring alternatives to no success (apparently you humans don?t like it when I take people into the underground one limb at a time) I have been left with no choice but to make offer a series of furious demands polite requests.
First: I would suggest a toll to be paid by the family for all instances of corpse-carrying post-expiration transport and disposal. Though I do my duty for kicks out of the goodness of my heart, with sufficient funding I could potentially purchase equipment that would make my occupation easier and safer. You expect me to pull corpses out of lakes by myself? Seriously?
Second: If possible, the corpse deceased should be brought to the edge of the Human Village for easy pickup and disposal. There has been a history of difficulty in trying to carry particularly fat generously weighted persons out of their houses when they?re wider than their goddamn doorways.
Third: Again, if possible, the dead guy deceased should be given a bath, or at least a good bit of washing before they are picked up by me a fully-qualified Post-Expiration Transporter, or PET for short. Though not necessary, this makes their departure much easier for the grieving family and means I don?t have to make the trip into the Blazing Fires wearing a nose peg and getting death glares from the oni.
Fourth, and finally: I would request that you pay further attention to your weight diets. I am not asking for you to fast or skip meals, but simply for you to stop stuffing your faces between every freaking meal count your calories more carefully. Even after death expiration, many human bodies maintain most of their weight, and it is hard to work when the deceased is obese overweight massive flabby huge gratuitously sized. There are many other benefits to this idea - maintaining control of your stomach diet will make you more athletic, more likely to help you get laid attract wholesome companions, and generally extend your life (as much as your tiny human lives can be extended, anyway).
To conclude, I would find my work much easier if you stopped being so goddamned fat larger than the cows you?re meant to be looking after wider than the radius of your average nuclear detonation so thoroughly spread ouFUCK IT SATORI-SAMA I?M SICK OF ALL THIS FANCY SHMANCY LANGUAGE
DEAR MASSIVE HUMANS
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF A VEGETABLE BEFORE
IF I THREW A POTATO AT YOUR FACE WOULD YOU DIE OF SOME SORT OF ALLERGIC REACTION, OR WOULD YOU DO WHAT YOU ALWAYS DO AND SWALLOW IT WHOLE WITHOUT EVEN TASTING IT
SERIOUSLY, HAVE YOU EVER TRIED CARRYING A BLOATED CORPSE SEVERAL MILES IN A CAT CART
DOES WONDERS FOR YOUR BONES, TRUST ME, MY CHIROPRACTOR SAYS I?LL NEVER STAND STRAIGHT AGAIN
AND IT?S THANKS TO ALL YOU HUMANS AND YOUR SWEETS AND YOUR CANDY AND YOUR SECOND AND THIRD AND FOURTH HELPINGS
I?D QUIT, BUT THERE?S ONLY ONE THING YOUR SPECIES IS ANY GOOD AT AND THAT?S DYING
WHERE ELSE AM I GOING TO FIND FUEL FOR THE FIRES OF HELL? EVERYTHING ELSE KEEPS COMING BACK TO LIFE, GODDAMMIT
SO HERE IS MY GODDAMN ULTIMATUM
IF YOU DIE, AND YOU ARE SO GODDAMN FAT I CAN?T CARRY YOU IN MY CART, I AM LEAVING YOU TO ROT
I?LL GIVE YOU THREE DAYS UNTIL THE LOCAL YOUKAI MAKE OFF WITH YOU AND STRIP THE MEAT FROM YOUR BONES
THAT?LL BE A NICE IMAGE FOR THE KIDS, WON?T IT
MIGHT BE A GOOD INCENTIVE TO PICK UP JOGGING OR TURN DOWN THAT THIRD SLAB OF STEAK, DON?T YOU AGREE
HOPEFULLY THAT GETS THE MESSAGE ACROSS BETTER THAN ANY OF THIS POLITICALLY CORRECT BULLSHIT EVER DID
Thank you for taking my ideas into consideration. I apologise for the inconvenience.
Yours sincerely,
Rin Kaenbyou
Post-Expiration Transporter
Earth Spirit Palace
Former Hell
-----
I wanted a break from all the dramatics that were flaring up in everything else I've been writing, before you ask. -_-
Rin is Kart
kat :comedycentral:
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I'm writing! And it's not water! And it's wait what is this
-----
Rei had just about had it with these goddamn leaves.
Every day, he stepped out of the shrine and brushed them into a neat little pile in the corner of the courtyard. Every night, they blew outwards and spread all about again as if he hadn’t done a thing. This had been happening all throughout autumn, but sweeping was a habit so deeply engraved into his morning ritual that he did it almost without thinking.
“Well, I guess this’ll teach me serenity or whatever it was the damn turtle was yapping about.”
Taking the nearby broom in both hands, Rei began to sweep the leaves out of the way for the umpteenth time. The cold autumn wind slipped under his robes, and he was grateful for the sarashi underneath. An extra layer was a welcome luxury at a time like this. He had a habit of cheating and wrapping on larger sarashis the colder it became; by winter, he was usually mummified below the neck. He didn’t care much, given that it worked.
As the leaves returned to their rightful place. Rei took a moment to brush a layer of sweat from his forehead. Always good to get some exercise. He’d been neglecting his training recently, but for him that was nothing new. He’d made it through everything Gensokyo had thrown at him until now, so things were unlikely to get much harder given all the incidents he’d already ‘resolved’.
Sometimes, though, it was the day-by-day that dragged on. He found himself missing the inconvenience of flying across Gensokyo to curb stomp another big-headed youkai who got on his nerves. It was annoying, but it was a welcome change to days of brushing away the same damn pile of leaves. Seriously, this was getting ridiculous. It couldn’t be accidental now, surely-
“Hayayayaya!”
The painful cackle that flooded Rei’s ears explained everything at once. He’d had a vague suspicion of the truth, but for the sake of his own sanity he had denied it. As the culprit landed in the courtyard with a flutter of his wings - blowing about the leaves as he did so - any doubt in Rei’s mind vanished.
Ayato Shameimaru stood on one leg, brushing at his face with the fan that served as his weapon of choice.
“Morning, Rei. Saw you hard at work as usual, and figured you could use some company to pass the time.”
Rei’s eyes turned to what had once been the fruits of half an hour of sweeping. He threw the broom to the side, his last ounce of patience for the job disappearing.
“Is that tengu-speak for ‘I’m going to hold your courtyard hostage until I get an interview’?”
“Oh, what are you implying?” Ayato stepped backwards, clutching his chest like he’d been wounded. “I assure you, any improvement to your morning regimen that takes place after this interview is entirely coincidental.”
Rei wasn’t sure why he’d even asked. There was no way Ayato would have given a straight answer anyway. Beneath his play of offense, Rei could see the childish smirk the tengu was giving him. He sighed, arms folded.
“Well, you’d better get started, then. The sooner you finish up, the sooner you fly off into the distance and leave me alone.”
The tengu nodded, kicking off the ground and taking to the air. He stopped a few inches in front of Rei’s face, hanging upside-down. The tokin hat he always sported clung to his head regardless, a small wind current holding it in place. That let Ayato use both his hands for his frantic note-taking.
“So, Mr. Hakurei. What’s your opinion on Remy Scarlet’s upcoming soiree?”
“The little vampire brat?” Rei still had a mental image of the kid running about in his head. He wouldn’t stop insisting he was the son of some famous lord from beyond the border, and he’d nearly caused an ecological disaster just so he could walk around in the day. That had been a fun case to ‘resolve’, if by resolve he meant ‘ritually humiliate in a spellcard duel’. “Unless dinner’s on the house, I couldn’t really care less about him.”
Ayato nodded, scribbling. “Blatant disrespect for nobility,” Rei heard him note under his breath. There was no point in objecting - when Ayato wanted to shame you on the front cover of the Bunbunmaru, no force on earth could stop him. Rei had tried everything he could think of, but every attempt just made the resulting headline more scandalous.
“Second question, then. There’s been a lot of skepticism about Yakumo’s promises to finally close the border to the netherworld. As the closest thing Yakumo has to a representative in Gensokyo, what’s your say on the matter?”
Rei groaned. Yukari Yakumo (he’d only held onto the name so that he could maintain a theme with naming his servants) had been avoiding his duties as Gensokyo’s protector as usual. The pathway to the netherworld had hung open for years now, and despite saying several times he would ‘get around to it’, the youkai of boundaries had done nothing to resolve the problem. There was no real dilemma - the spirits of the netherworld were usually too content with their peaceful lives to enter Gensokyo, and the youkai of Gensokyo appreciated being alive too much to meet with death himself. It just made an annoying little tear in the sky, that got more annoying for Rei when he was expected to answer questions about it.
“Yukari’s told me nothing about it. I assume he’ll wait until the last minute before he fixes it. That’s his usual MO, anyway.”
Ayato’s scribbling doubled in speed. “Untrusted by superior, yet supports his laid-back demeanor...curious contradiction.”
Without meaning it, Rei’s hands clenched into fists. He reached into a pocket on his robe, his hand resting on a trio of sealing talismans. Not to be thrown right away, but it was always good to be prepared.
“Alright. One last question, and we’ll be done here.” Ayato’s grin jerked upwards, shifting to the almost cruel grin that Rei had learned to fear. The tengu had saved his best question until the end.
“What’s the deal with your on-again-off-again relationship with Mr. Kirisame? You’ve been seen in the Forest of Magic recently...”
Rei felt bile rise in his throat. Of course this question was going to come up. Visit a friend once or twice out of boredom, and all of a sudden you’re lovers through and through. He almost fired off his warning shots, but a better riposte came to him beforehand. He smiled.
“We’re about as close as you and that wolf friend of yours.”
That had the intended effect of getting on Ayato’s nerves. An eyebrow rose (fell? It was hard to tell when he was upside down) as his hand suddenly drew a violent line across the notepad.
“Hey, watch what you’re saying. I can’t stand that Momiji guy! I swear, he’s got rabies or something. One time, I tried to get an interview with him, and-”
He was distracted. This was as good a chance as any. Rei pulled the talismans from his pocket, flinging them at the tengu while he was unprepared. Instinct allowed him to dodge the first two, but the third caught him square in the chest. The resulting impact sent him flying out from the courtyard, and probably straight down a good chunk of the stairway that ran down the mountain.
Rei felt his shoulders loosen. There was always a great relief in swatting away a frustrating youkai. He wondered what sort of scandalous headline would be gracing the Bunbunmaru tomorrow. “Hakurei Brutalises Innocent Reporter In Love Feud”? Whatever it was, it was something to look forward to. There was no way it would be as dull as the rest of the chores he had to do today.
He looked about the courtyard again, at the leaves he had finally swept away before Ayato’s intervention. With a heavy shrug of his shoulders, he walked back into the shrine, leaving the yard in disarray. Technically, he had swept the leaves away, and he was willing to let himself off on a technicality.
Like every encounter he’d had with the tengu, this called for a strong drink.
-----
“This isn’t another firework, is it?”
Alexander Margatroid appreciated his time alone. He usually greeted anyone who interfered with his solitude with a bullet to the face, but there was only one individual he was willing to offer his time to. The individual in question was currently hauling him through the forest, giving no heed to the various murky puddles he was splashing through on the way.
“What? Like I’d ever bore you with something as simple as a firework, Alex? This is so much better.”
Marcus Kirisame’s voice chirped with anticipation. It was that eagerness that dually made him so interesting and so irritating. Alex looked down at his one-blue jeans, now mostly an ugly shade of brown. Marcus’s robes had fared no better, but he didn’t care in the slightest. Had he been raised in a barn? No, that seemed a little too civilised for someone who ate mushrooms for a living.
After a too-long trek through what must have been the worst path in the entire forest, Marcus’s house came into view. In a lot of ways, it reflected the man who called it home - rough around the edges, with a lot of useless junk stored away inside, but it was that roughness that gave him character. If he’d been as orderly and refined as Alex, he might even have been worth considering a rival - as it was, he was a troublesome but sometimes interesting acquaintance.
There was no lock on the door, and Marcus barged right in without bothering to wring the mud from his robes. It had caked by then, and thankfully he at least had the decency to leave his shoes at the door. Alex followed, wishing he’d brought along one of his puppets to clean up after him.
He quickly remembered why Marcus was unafraid of potential thieves. His floors were littered with countless artifacts, to the point where walking from one room to another was almost a safety hazard. It was impossible for Alex to tell which of these trinkets were junk and which were priceless, and he had a strange feeling Marcus wasn’t so sure either. Unless he knew exactly what was useful, and the rest of it was just a distraction...no, that was ridiculous. There was no way that Marcus could have devised such a cunning plan, surely.
“Pretty sure it was around here somewhere...”
The wizard crouched down besides one of the many piles of trinkets, shoving his hand in and feeling around. Apparently, he’d actually memorised where everything of interest was hidden in this trainwreck of a house. That was impressive, but at the same time disturbing. Finally, he pulled out a small silvery trinket and presented it to Alex.
“It’s a...” Alex peered closer, trying to make head or tail of the device. It wasn’t a magical artifact of any sort; nor was it a piece of equipment he would use for building his puppets. That meant it fell out of both his areas of expertise - all he could see was a small metal cylinder with a hole at its top. “...it’s the most pathetic flute I’ve ever seen in my life.”
Marcus took offense to that, his glare piercing through Alex’s eyes. “Hey, I’ll have you know this is an ultra experimental super-high-frequency Fairy Flute!”
“Is that what Nicolai told you?” Alex asked, rolling his eyes. Marcus had been spending more and more time with the kappa of late, getting more and more interested in the sciences they’d been forwarding to Gensokyo. Personally, Alex had never seen the appeal - magic could accomplish much more than the sciences when you did enough work, so why opt for the cheap way out?
“Yes, well.” Marcus twirled the whistle between his fingers with uncanny ease. “Nicolai says that it plays a note at a frequency so high that even most youkai can’t hear it. Only fairies can make it out because they’re so close to the earth, or something like that. He used a lot of big words I didn’t really get when he was explaining it.”
Alex had a strange feeling ‘big words’ started at seven letters and above when Marcus was involved. He put a hand to his temple, grumbling. He’d been called away from his research to watch Marcus play with woodwind instruments?
“So I suppose you want me to be on point if your kappa friend is wrong and you blow out your own eardrums.”
“Well, that’d be nice,” Marcus said as he started to make his way towards the door, “but I figured you’d wanna see what happened if it went right. I’m not sure how the fairies are meant to react to a sound like this.”
Alex couldn’t admit he was very interested in the idea, but he followed Marcus outside regardless. Now that he’d come this far, there was no point in taking the trip home without anything to show for it beyond a ruined pair of trousers. He stepped with care around the mountains of junk Marcus called his belongings, stepping beside him in the clearing outside his home.
The trees around him bristled with the sadness of autumn. Though the leaves never fell from their trees, they still took on an almost eerie shade of red in time with the season. Alex had never been concerned by it - after all, a tree was hardly much of a threat unless it fell on him.
Marcus primed the whistle (or flute, as he insisted on calling it), putting it to his mouth and taking a breath. Out of a careful paranoia, Alex put his hands over his ears just in case Nicolai’s claim was false. Memories of that one incident involving the alarm clock that turned out to be an explosive still haunted his mind. That had been quite possibly the worst birthday present of his life.
As Marcus played the whistle’s only note, Alex was glad to find that his brain was not seeping out through his ears. Pulling his hands away, he found that the flute was making no audible sound whatsoever; as Marcus finished playing, he looked at the instrument with a puzzled face.
“Huh. Nothing’s really happening. Is this thing broken or-”
Marcus’s ponderings were cut short as a massive THWUMP broke the morning silence. Alex jerked around, hands primed to pull at unseen strings if necessary. There was no need for conflict, though - the unseen intruders were in no state to fight. A trio of young fairies had fallen - presumably from Marcus’s roof - and were lying in a heap right at his doorstep. Three voices began to bicker at once.
“Dammit, Arty! You were supposed to keep us quiet! This is your fault!” the largest of the three yelped, his long blonde hair running into his friends’ eyes.
“My fault?! Sirius didn’t say anything about him having a Fairy Flute!” a smaller fairy whined, his hair in loops poking into the ground and up to the sky.
“How was I supposed to know it would be that loud? And you’re the one who fell first, Sol!” the third fairy muttered, his black hair covering half of his face.
“Shut up! I just did it because I knew you two were gonna fall, and I didn’t want you to feel bad!”
Their argument continued, the three of them evidently forgetting they were being watched. Marcus grinned, reaching into a pocket in his robes and walking towards them. Alex already knew what he was reaching for, even before he pulled it out. He twirled the small wooden box on one finger as he stode along, lining himself up so that the ensuing barrage wasn’t going to damage any of his own property.
The forest wouldn’t be quite so lucky.
“Hey, you three. How’s about getting off my property?”
Marcus pointed the box at the tangled trio, their wings flapping in vain. They looked at the point of light forming at the centre of the box, then at each other, then back at the box.
By then, it was too late.
“MASTER SPARK!”
The laser that burst from the box was a brilliant white, occasionally flickering with every colour of the rainbow. Alex had to shield his eyes from the sheer intensity of the blast; when he looked back seconds later, there was no sign of the three fairies at the doorstep. There was also no sign of the patch of forest that had been directly in the line of fire - a straight line had been torn through the trees, and a new pathway had just been added to its already puzzling labyrinth.
Marcus shrugged. “Might make getting outta the forest easier, I guess. And it’s not like anything good was ever achieved without a little collateral damage...”
Alex felt his muscles stiffen. That laissez-faire attitude was intriguing and infuriating all at once. Being in Marcus’s presence was at the same time an interesting experience and an utter waste of time.
“Anyway, while you’re here, want me to get you a drink?” Marcus asked, one hand behind his back as he pocketed the flute. “Picked up some nice mushrooms on this morning’s collection. I can make a batch of that brew you always liked...”
He was lucky he could make a damn good cup of tea, or he wouldn’t have been worth Alex’s time.
“I think that should make up for my crushing disappointment, yes.”
-----
BLAME SAKANA HE GAVE ME THE IDEA
[i may write more of these because they're entertaining in a very strange way]
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... I love you. [And Sakana as well.]
I may or may not have some more requests for you as a result of this... Because this is pretty cool. Funny too~ <3
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oh god that was awesome
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I regret nothing. And it's strangely entertaining to see our familiar girls as guys for once :D
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Says you. I think I'm scarred for life.
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I dunno, I could get along with Ayato fairly easily.
Ulterior motives? Never.
>___>
<___<
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Now with 100% more fitting avatars/names/texts for the occassion. :]
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The moment I saw him step out of the palace, I knew the scales had tipped.
I had long since learned my brother?s little ticks. There was a weight in his eyes, as if he was struggling to keep them open, and his shoulders had sunk towards his chest. He was looking off into the distance as he walked away, muttering beneath his breath. I left him to himself, following behind for a few minutes until we had cleared the palace. I was no more than five paces away from him, yet he never gave me so much as a glance. That was how my brother always acted when he was deep in thought, forgetting the world around him existed.
It took a small prod on the shoulder to pull him out of this trance.
?What??
Though he only spoke a single syllable, the aggression hidden behind it was obvious. As he turned towards me I feared for a moment he would strike, but his hands unclenched when he recognised me. Like him, I was dressed in the formal robes of the Imperial council, but my penchant for adding a hint of colour to an otherwise bland outfit gave me away.
?Ah, Futo. My apologies. The negotiations have been...difficult.?
Difficult was not a word my brother often used. Frustrating, yes. Long-winded, definitely. But he had too high an opinion of himself to ever call his duty ?difficult?. That was another warning of what was to occur.
?Is Emperor Youmei still acting stubborn?? I asked, keeping my nerves to myself. ?The Soga appear to have him under his thumb-?
?Emperor Youmei died this morning.?
It took a few seconds for his words to sink in. Every emotion I could conceive struck me in an instant - anger, fear, sorrow, hatred, and countless others. I could not show this, though. It was essential that a member of the Imperial nobility left their emotions to one side, even the women.
As I sat in silence taking in his words, I caught my brother?s eyes falling down upon himself. He looked at his hands, growing agitated, brushing them against each other like he was trying to rub something off. They darted across his robe, searching for a stain, but from what I could see his attire was spotless. It was unlike my brother to be so concerned of such trifles. His behaviour now reminded me more of paranoia than of anything else. A thought was coming to me - a heartless one, but one based solely on fact.
?How did he die?? I asked. It was a question for my sake as much as his. I expected my brother to answer instantly, taking on the level of disconnection that had brought the Mononobe clan to its position in the first place.
Much to my dismay, he hesitated, looking away as if to think his answer over.
?Disease, of course. You know that of the epidemic spreading across the country, I presume.?
I nodded. The illness had claimed dozens of lives in the last few weeks, among them venerable members of the Emperor?s council. It was easy to believe that the Emperor himself, old as he was, had also succumbed to the disease.
And yet, something seemed amiss. There had been no reports of ill health in the Emperor of late, and my brother had visited him as early as last night. His hesitation was more damning than any word he could have uttered.
On that alone I knew that this was more than the simple passing of an emperor. This was the tipping point of the battle that had gone on for years, the point where at last the first drops of blood would be shed.
My brother regained his composure, looking towards me with a solemn smile. ?We will make the most of this situation. While the Emperor is replaced, we have time to begin our own counterattack. Soga has lost his control over the throne for now, and Prince Anahobe has offered me his support. If fortune smiles on us, Shinto will return to its rightful place throughout Japan.?
?And assuming that the Buddhists disapprove of you throwing them out of the country?? I was blunt, as I often was when acting as my brother?s consort. He had never quite grown used to that, the question always forcing him to flinch and take a second to reconsider. I wondered, for a moment, how things might have changed if we were in each other?s positions.
He was silent for a long while after that, his hands clenching into fists once again. ?I shall fight for my beliefs if need be, and the rest of the Mononobe will fight alongside me. If words will not win us the throne, then steel will suffice.?
The look of intent that went along with those words made something stir in my chest. Without thinking about it I stepped away from my brother, just out of arm?s reach. I stared at him, ready for him to lash out at any moment. He wouldn?t, of course - he had no idea what was really going on - but the thought of it still concerned me.
?Futo,? he said, his voice losing all emotion. ?You should leave. Find a village that will take you in. Do not tell them who you are. Do not reappear until we have taken the throne. Do you understand??
I knew it was his way of showing concern for me, but the empty tone he spoke with left me unimpressed. I had seen less and less of him since Emperor Youmei?s rise to the throne, when the squabbling between himself and the head of the Soga family had begun. The desire to see the Buddhists removed from Japan had absorbed him, slowly at first, until now he could think of little else. Even looking after me had become an afterthought.
On top of that, his actions had grown more and more extreme. Initially he kept his concerns for the court, but over the years he had become more aggressive, and now there were stories of Buddhist shrines across the country being burnt down in my brother?s name. The epidemic had started soon afterward, and the Soga were quick to blame it on my brother?s actions.
There was no doubt how the Soga would react to this.
?...Yes, brother. May the gods smile on your campaign.?
Looking back on it, I wonder how I left him so easily. We parted at the gate, going our separate ways, as if nothing was wrong in the slightest. At some level, deep down, I knew that I would probably never see him again. He would die, and the rest of the Mononobe clan would die alongside him.
And yet, as I found myself beginning the long walk towards the Soga encampment, I realised that I honestly didn?t care.
-----
It took two days off the beaten track to make it to my destination. Taking the straight path would have brought me there in half the time, but would have attracted too much attention. I was, after all, a member of the Mononobe, and the guards were likely to have me executed on sight following the Emperor?s death. My meetings with Lord Umako had been kept strictly secret, to the point where only the highest members of the Soga council were aware of my allegiance with them.
The journey took me through the dense foliage of the nearby forest. It kept me safe from detection, but left me vulnerable to the whims of the wild. The nights were filled with the whispers of the beasts, but the mornings were filled with their roars. I could not stop to sleep, lest something devour me while I was unaware.
Theoretically, I should not have managed it. No force on earth should have allowed a young woman such as myself to trek through unforgiving terrain for days on end without need for rest, let alone need for food or drink. If I were to ever tell the story to Lord Umako, he would have dismissed me as a liar or a charlatan.
Fortunately, I had tapped into a force beyond the mortal realm. For years, unbeknownst to my family, I had trained myself in the way of the hermit, reaching a state of physical perfection that seasoned warriors could only dream of. This power lay not with the Shintoism of the Mononobe, nor with the Buddhism of the Soga, but with a third faction entirely.
I was a follower of the Tao.
Running on a power fueled by years of asceticism, I finally arrived at the Soga encampment no worse for wear. My robes were stained from various swamps I?d been forced to tread through, though. Physically I looked a mess, but I knew there was no need to worry for my health - least of all about this epidemic that was spreading about. I stuck to the forest, walking around the encampment away from the front gate. Entering head-on was exactly what I?d taken this detour to avoid.
Circling around, I came to a stop at the distant end of the encampment. The rear entrance, of course, was almost as well guarded as the front entrance. I looked up towards the sky, seeing the sun hanging over my head. I nodded to myself. She would be taking her walk any second now, surely. I kept my eyes locked on the entrance, waiting for my cohorts to emerge.
Eventually, the pair of them stepped out, having what seemed to be a jovial talk to one another. From here, they looked like two ordinary young girls - one in a long green dress with the pleasant but empty look of a noblewoman, and another in a blue dress with flowers running across her vest.
I knew for a fact that the second girl was anything but ordinary.
Being seen was still a poor idea. Tojiko, the girl in the green, was still unaware whose side I was on. It was her companion that I was depending on here. I waited behind a nearby tree as they walked past, then gently tapped at its trunk with my knuckles.
For Tojiko, the sound was far too faint to be heard. Her companion, though, turned towards the forest with a single raised eyebrow. I poked my head out for a moment to catch her attention. She nodded, then turned back to Tojiko.
?Sorry, can you head back in? I?ve got something I need to take care of.?
Tojiko nodded, seeming a little clueless as to what was going on. She wasn?t of the same calibre as myself, that much was obvious. She strolled back to the encampment, while her partner walked towards me.
Through the trees, of course. Seiga had never been the sort to make unnecessary detours around things if she could avoid it.
?You look lousy, Futo.?
As informal as always. Seiga was brilliant, but she was anything but noble.
?I presume that the news from the palace has beaten me here,? I answered, ignoring Seiga?s remark with a well-practiced calmness. The Tao had helped with it, but life as a noblewoman had taught me more about staying calm than any asceticism.
?Yup. Word is your brother?s trying to raise an army to fight over the throne. Umako?s going nuts about how the disease is a sign that he?s outta whack, and they?re pretty much set to wipe the Mononobe out.?
There was no concern in Seiga?s voice, despite the fact she was telling me that my whole family was probably going to die. I never figured out whether it was because she knew I harboured no love for my bloodline or if she honestly didn?t care.
?Anyway,? Seiga said, taking my hand. ?I?m guessing you want to talk with the big man.?
I nodded. Seiga led me around through the forest again, coming to a stop at the side. A heavy curtain stood between us and the other side - more notably, several wooden logs carved into stakes had been erected to stop charging infantry. Seiga cared for none of these, passing through them as if she was made of air.
Following on behind her was something that I still wasn?t calm with. Taoism had taught me to do many things, but the art of walking through walls was one that only Seiga had mastered. She was several hundred years my senior, and my main tutor on the way of the Tao. As I held her hand her power was channeled into me, and I became as immaterial as she was. We passed through the border together, taking physical form again when we had emerged on the other side. A small part of me wondered what would happen if she let go halfway, then quickly decided that was a subject too macabre to dwell on.
We had emerged behind one of the small temples the Soga used for religious practice. I?d been the one to suggest it, telling Lord Umako that having a Buddhist temple within the encampment would both cement his position and improve his soldiers? morale. He?d taken the advice to heart, much like everything else I?d told him. Despite being the sister of one of his most hated enemies, he considered me his most trusted adviser. I?d proven my worth to him many times over the years, appearing more and more often as the war between Buddhism and Shintoism grew stronger.
He was entirely unaware that my allegiance was with a third party.
Seiga stepped into the temple, once again proving she was beyond petty human concepts such as doors. While I waited for her, I removed the damning robe that would reveal my identity, letting my hair down as a final countermeasure. She emerged a few minutes later with a flowing orange robe, fitting for a Buddhist monk. She at least had the decency to let me change in private, reappearing to take away my dirty clothes when I was done. That would be enough to hide me from the common guard, at least.
From then on, she led me towards the war meeting. Already Lord Umako was surrounded by half a dozen of his consults, his face bright red as each of them offered their reports.
?Moriya Mononobe?s forces are continuing their advance, sir. Our numbers are great, but our rations are dwindling. If they cut our supplies-?
?Sir, the epidemic has struck our forces! Reports mark 200 as ill, with 50 casualties! Morale is-?
?Sir, the attacks on nearby temples are growing more frequent. Monks are being executed where they sta-?
?We have to move now, before they get the upper hand! If we wait for the palace?s consent, we risk-?
?Ridiculous! If we move without the Emperor?s mandate, we?ll be traitors ourselves! We have to-?
?Lord Moriya may be too forceful here, sir. There will be too many casualties if we-?
Six voices were speaking at once, each merging into the other. More than once I heard Lord Umako call for silence, but his words clearly held little strength at his own table. He was a poor leader - strongly opinionated, but lacking the conviction to fight for his beliefs.
That had made my job much easier.
I took my seat at the far end of the table. This was not my place to intervene, and the best I could do was watch as the council continued its bickering. Seiga had already wandered off to do whatever it was she did in her spare time. The arguments continued, neither side gaining an edge, until at last a voice emerged from the side.
?Would you all take your turns with your complaints? I understand that Lord Umako does not share my gift.?
A young, but powerful voice jumped into the fray, and the council fell silent in an instant. Its owner stepped forward, taking their seat across from me, a long hooded cloak keeping their face hidden from all. Many would have considered this an act of defiance on the intruder?s part.
When the intruder in question was the young prince Shoutoku, no-one would have made that accusation.
?M-My apologies, my lord!? one of the distant councilors uttered, bowing deeply. Shoutoku gave a vague nod in his direction, not letting the hood slip away from his face. A pair of brilliant grey eyes shone out from underneath it, catching the looks of everyone at the table.
The prince was famous for his ability to hear ten conversations at once, and offer the appropriate advice to each and every one of them. He looked towards each of the councilors, issuing orders on Lord Umako?s behalf.
?Pull supplies from the nearby villages. Offer them protection from the disease spreading across the country.? He moved to the second councilor. ?Inform the troops that the disease is a decay of the soul, and that it can be overcome with devoted meditation.? To the third, ?Let it be known that we will fight for our beliefs, and that enlightenment is attained only through action.? The last three, he addressed at once - ?We will meet them at Shigisan, and we shall defeat them in the name of Emperor Youmei. The Mononobe will pay for their insolence.?
The six councilors nodded along, quickly rising to their feet and journeying off to perform their duties. Only Lord Umako, the prince and myself remained at the table. I allowed myself a smile.
?If I had known you would be in charge here, my lord,? I said, towards the prince, ?I may have known there was no need to make the journey here after all.?
The prince smiled back. The two of us shared a unspoken joke at Lord Umako?s expense. The head of the Soga family had slumped backwards into his chair, weighed down by the armour he?d been wearing since rumours of war had begun. He looked towards me with a hint of concern.
?Perhaps the prince has us prepared for conflict, but only you are skilled enough to lead us through the storm that follows. What shall we do when the Mononobe are routed? How do we maintain the throne??
I had thought the answer to this question over in the two days I?d spent traveling here. It had taken some serious consideration, but I was just about content with my answer. I looked towards Lord Umako, my expression deadly severe.
?With Mononobe defeated, we will install Sushun on the throne.?
Lord Umako raised an eyebrow. ?Sushun? But he does not approve of the Soga family. How do you intend to keep him in check??
?Quite simple,? I answered, my expression never faltering. ?You will wed me to him, and I will deal with any issues myself.?
That was enough to take Lord Umako aback, a rare look of surprise rising to his face. Prince Shoutoku didn?t respond, but he offered a very small nod in my direction.
?...Well, I cannot deny that your planning is brilliant, Futo,? Umako sighed, ?but are you certain you want to take on this role? As a member of the Mononobe, you will likely be unpopular in the palace.
I shook my head. ?My deeds here will exonerate me of suspicion. Besides, if Buddhism is to flourish as we desire it to, we must have our own hand in the way of the Emperor.?
Lord Umako looked at me, still stunned, before finally nodding.
?The Mononobe lost a great adviser when you came to me, Futo.? He rose to his feet, the armour shuffling about. ?I will see to the troops. Lord Moriya will regret the day he dared to oppose the Soga.? With that, he strode off towards the main encampment, ready to give another speech to instill the Buddhist way in his army. I was alone with the prince, and everyone who could have walked in on us was busy with other duties.
The prince grinned as he pulled down the hood, revealing that he wasn?t much of a prince at all.
?I always imagined the head of a family like the Soga would be harder to manipulate.?
Miko was relieved to bring the hood down, allowing her hair to stand as it naturally did. Two points stood on end, like an extra pair of ears that helped her to hear so many conversations at once. Her voice was softer now, more feminine, but she?d taken on the alias of a man for political reasons. Buddhism still frowned on female monks, so having a woman leading the charge for Buddhism was paradoxical.
?All this talk about Buddhism, and their ego blinds them to our actions,? I answered, returning the grin. ?Pitiful, if you think about it.?
That seemed to hurt Miko, and as we walked to the other side of the table a darkness came across her face.
?Isn?t it? Look at them all, bickering over whose religion is right and whose is wrong. Our history is stained with bloodshed, with countless men and women dying over the smallest of disagreements. I?ve seen so much of it, and it breaks my heart.?
She reached out over the table, taking my hand and squeezing. Without thinking about it, I squeezed back.
?If there were any other way, I would have taken it,? Miko continued, sorrow staining every word. ?I didn?t want this to come to blows. I?d hoped your family would just accept Buddhism, but they remain loyal to the old gods. At the very least, it may serve as an example to those who come after that Buddhism is the best solution.?
It disturbed me slightly that Miko?s words seemed to be drifting past me. She seemed to have more remorse for the impending demise of the Mononobe than I did. Not worth thinking about, I decided. Soon, my heritage and this battle would be a thing of the past. It was the future we had to focus on.
?How is your research going?? I asked. Miko thought it over for a moment, looking unsure whether she should answer, but finally did.
?I have been looking into cinnabar of late. The dose would kill an ordinary human, but with my practice of Taoism I should survive it. If my theories are correct, it should leave my body permanently preserved.?
The search for immortality had been Miko?s greatest endeavour. She?d come to me through Lord Umako, though he was totally unaware that we both happened to be Taoists. She?d been the one to suggest spreading Buddhism to keep the nation in check, while we tapped into the powers of the Tao in secret.
Miko squeezed my hand again. ?I can?t risk leaving humanity to itself, Futo. If I die, the fighting will break out again. Thousands, millions will die because they can?t come to an agreement...so I?ll make them agree. Maybe my methods aren?t the purest, but the end justifies the means. The people will bow to an immortal saint, and peace will reign forever.?
She looked distant, still not looking me in the eye, and her words carried a vague uncertainty. I took a deep breath, before once again pressing at Miko?s hand.
?And I will gladly serve beneath you in the name of peace.?
Miko looked at me, seeing my earnest expression, and tears came to her eyes almost immediately. I suspect that nothing other than her standing as a noble stopped her from embracing me right then. To the rest of the world, we were two nobles with the nation's fate resting on our shoulders.
But behind it all, we were just two girls ready to fight the world to make our dreams come true.
-----
I basically wrote this with the goal of making Miko look sympathetic as a character rather than being AGH AGH EVIL like she's usually portrayed. In that regard, I think I managed to do relatively well.
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Yes, you did do a pretty good job invoking sympathy in Miko, even though it seems like Futo isn't as morally inclined as Miko is, and despite the fact I'm still not totally sold on the, "make war to make peace" method. Anyways, good writing as always Rou.
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The character you gave Futo is interesting, and you really managed to show how devoted they are to their goal. However, as you know, I wish for more! Too tired to say anything else...
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Just read the latest.
Best 12d fanfic I have read yet.
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?Nothing like a summer morning, is there??
The voice caused Kanako to flinch. For the last half hour, Suwako had been doing her best impression of a garden ornament, lying sprawled out across the courtyard without making so much as a sound. The only movement she?d made was waving her arms and legs up and down, like she was making snow angels without the snow.
It brought Kanako back into focus. The mornings were always slow at the shrine, so she had too much time to herself. She would stare off into the distance, eyes glazed over, lost in reminiscence. Suwako?s voice was at just the right pitch to rip her out of that trance. Whether that was intentional or accidental, Kanako had never been certain.
?I suppose it?s good for business,? Kanako answered, straightening her back as she sat up, crossing her legs. ?The tengu know I can just rain on their parade whenever I want, so they?re grateful that I keep my power to myself.?
Suwako giggled, sliding along the ground as if she was swimming. She came to a stop right in front of Kanako, her hat?s googly eyes staring up at her fellow god?s face.
?C?mon, Kanako. It?s not all about business anymore. We got past that stage about the time we finished Hisoutensoku.?
Kanako grimaced, loosening her shoulders with some effort. She glared, snatching Suwako?s hat and holding it upwards.
?What?s with this whole ?we? thing? I don?t remember agreeing that you were in charge of anything.?
Suwako?s eyes turned to the hat immediately, and in a single motion she had risen to her feet and hopped upwards. She snatched it back, a sly grin running across her face.
?What about that time you asked me for advice on the Yatagarasu??
?Executive decision,? Kanako answered, folding her arms as she stood up. She was a head and a half taller than her companion, and loomed over her to make sure every inch counted. ?You would have complained that I?d left you out of the loop if I hadn?t run it past you first.?
Suwako put her hand on Kanako?s shoulder, stepping on her toes to stand as tall as possible. ?That means I am in the loop, though, doesn?t it??
Kanako had no answer to that. She turned around, shoulders rigid again, making her way back into the shrine proper. She had to prepare a contingency plan in case Hakurei decided she wasn?t keen on sharing the faith.
She nearly tripped over Suwako?s foot as the earth goddess swerved around her, her expression darkening.
?Seriously, Kanako, could you lighten up a little?? she asked, even the eyes on her hat glaring straight into Kanako?s face. ?You?re being a real downer, and I don?t like having great mornings like this wrecked by a worry-wart.?
Kanako sighed. Suwako hadn?t been in charge of the shrine for centuries. She?d forgotten the daily stresses, the constant fear that another god would show up and take your believers away, all the little things that kept Kanako awake at night. Today was good, but what about tomorrow? What if one of the other old gods had the same idea she?d had, and decided to take root in Gensokyo and rip away all the work she?d put in over the years?
Suwako had been like this, once. Kanako remembered the days of old, when her rival had stood eye-to-eye with her, a spotless symbol of womanly beauty. Now she looked like a child who?d been taken in out of pity. She?d forgotten the responsibilities of a goddess, and Gensokyo had worn away at what little maturity she had left.
?What do you want me to say, Suwako?? Kanako growled. ?Do you want me to just sit back and hope that everything works out??
?I want you to stop seeing enemies that aren?t there.?
Suwako grabbed her by the hand, spinning her around. Looking out from the courtyard, at the top of the Youkai Mountain, Kanako could see all of Gensokyo in its full glory. The lush forests, the pure lakes, the brilliant flower fields - everything here was verging on perfect, the sort of beauty that the outside world couldn?t hope to achieve.
?Look out there, Kanako,? Suwako demanded, her voice gaining a strength Kanako hadn?t heard from her for centuries. ?Do you see anyone trying to steal from us??
Kanako blinked once or twice, the question blindsiding her, before shaking her head.
?Do you have any reason to think that things are going to go wrong??
Again, Kanako could do nothing but shake her head. Suwako tugged at her sleeve.
?Then why do you have to act like it all the time??
Her words made a childish sort of sense, Kanako thought to herself. She?d been comfortable when she was fighting to take control of the shrine, when there was an obvious threat to take care of, but the comparative peace of being in command of the shrine was something she?d never quite accepted. When it had been time to make the jump to Gensokyo, the new wave of potential threats and dangers had brought her back to life, sharpening her senses to a level they had never reached over centuries of dominion.
Kanako?s shoulders tightened again, feeling like they were ready to snap off. Her lips stuttered open and closed, looking for something to say, but no words came out. Suwako took that as consent, and hauled her into the shrine.
?You?re taking a break, Kanako, and you?re going to enjoy it.?
Kanako could have broken away at any time. Hell, with the amount of faith running through her, she could have flung Suwako so far that Hakurei would be scraping her off of the Boundary. But as she tried to come up with a good reason for it, her brain stalled entirely. Had she really been so tense all this time?
She made no attempt to fight back as Suwako hauled her in front of the kotatsu. It was one of the few luxuries they?d managed to keep from the outside world, and with the help of the kappa they?d even managed to give it a working power source. Not that it was on, of course - the heat was so stifling that if the kotatsu was on as well the pair of them were likely to melt.
?I know how you feel, Kanako,? Suwako yelled as she walked off into the kitchen. ?I?ve been there. For decades I had to fight off a whole buncha wise guys who wanted to take my land and make it part of their super-country. Japan? I had to worry every day whether the next guy to come along was going to be the one, whether I was gonna lose everything.?
Kanako felt herself shrink as the words hit her. She was ?the one? that Suwako was talking about, and the goddess?s words stung with accusation.
?And y?know what? It happened. You showed up, and beat me fair and square. Everything I was scared about happened, and I lost everything.?
For a few seconds, there was silence other than the sound of Suwako rummaging through the backrooms for something. Kanako bit her lip, eying the door, wondering if it was a good idea to leave before this discussion got too morbid.
?But that was when it hit me,? Suwako continued, her voice regaining some of its former life. ?I?d spent so much time worrying about losing what I had, I never took the time to actually appreciate it. I mean, no offense, but I did pretty well for myself. A kingdom to myself, the best steel anyone could muster, and control of the Mishaguji? That?s not an achievement to make light of, if you don?t mind me blowing my own horn.?
Finally she re-emerged from the backrooms, holding a bottle in one hand. Even before she?d opened it Kanako knew it was sake - she recognised the fancy calligraphy the tengu spread across their alcohol in an attempt to hide how brutal their drinking sessions became. In her other hand she held a pair of cups, which she laid down on the kotatsu as she undid the bottle?s lid.
?And think about it. Not only did you beat a fine little goddess like me, but you also managed to save the shrine from the brink of collapse with a risky move to Gensokyo. There were plenty of things that could?ve gone wrong with it, but you got around it all and now we?re pretty much the biggest force in the country.?
The lid came off with a gentle pop, and Suwako carefully poured its contents into one of the cups. She pushed it along the kotatsu, coming to a stop right in front of Kanako.
?So how about it?? Suwako asked, back to her childish self. ?A toast to your success??
It was a trick question, Kanako thought. Gensokyo wasn?t the sort of nation where you had one drink and stopped it there. This would lead to a second bottle, and a third, and by the time the tengu arrived in the evening for the usual feasting she would already be wasted. (Of course, she could have chosen not to be drunk, but the patrons appreciated it more when she played along.)
Finally, with the look of a child gulping down unpleasant medicine, Kanako snatched up the glass and downed its contents with a single chug. The alcohol worked its way through her body quickly, and she felt herself loosen up, like her worries were taking being sieved out of her. A grin rose uncontrollably to her face.
?Heh, sorry. Forgot you?re supposed to make the toast before you take the drink.? She held her cup out towards Suwako. ?Lemme try that again.?
Suwako returned the grin, pouring herself a drink as soon as she?d refilled Kanako?s cup. ?That?s the spirit. Wasn?t so hard, was it??
Kanako nodded. When she got a drink or two in her system, the pride washed away, and she was back to the haughty warrior god she?d been all those years ago. Usually that was why she didn?t play along with the feasting - that was Suwako?s job. She was meant to act mature and divine, staying away from worldly pleasures like alcohol.
But maybe that had been a bad move, Kanako thought to herself. It had put her on a different level from her patrons. They couldn?t relate to her when she refused to take part in even their most basic pleasures. It was a realisation that hit her harder with every glass of sake.
She was out of practice, she decided. If she wanted to be able to keep up with the tengu, it was a good idea for her to warm up. Surely another bottle wouldn?t hurt...
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Awesome as always man. 8)
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New page, new story! :3
Didn't feel like writing DRK today. All that dark and serious stuff made me feel like writing something lighter to clear my palette. So I took an idea I semi-introduced back in one of my old stories (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,10805.0.html) and expanded it a little. Hope it brings some smiles to some faces. :>
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This bush was comfy.
Briar had slept in many a bush over the years, but she?d grown attached to this one. Its leaves felt softer than those of its neighbours, rubbing tenderly at her wings as she slumbered. She had the best dreams when she slept here, and she?d fought off a fairy or two to claim it as her own.
When morning came, her eyes opened in an instant. There was no feeling of sleepiness - fairies were part of Gensokyo?s lifeforce itself, so they woke up in time with the earth around them. Briar pulled herself to her feet, giving her wings a quick test flap. No, the bats hadn?t been nibbling at them during the night. It had happened once, and she?d been cautious about it ever since.
She pulled herself out of the bush. It was about as tall as she was, which was to say that it stood at a mighty four feet. More than once the frills on her long red dress snagged on the twigs, and she had to tug to free herself. It was an occupational hazard of sleeping here.
Her stash was sitting in front of the bush, and looking down at it Briar couldn?t help but frown.
?Aw, someone broke the tank again...?
Sitting at her feet was a pair of rubber flippers and a large pink cylinder with a very clear puncture in it. She picked it up and gave it a little shake, and heard the rattling of a pebble inside. Grumbling, she rolled it out and threw it to the ground. Probably another fairy playing a prank.
?Why can?t anyone appreciate how advanced this machinery is??
Briar curled her hand up into a fist, bringing it down on the hole that the pebble had left. The metal flashed for a moment as Briar felt a pulse of magic charge through her body. When she lifted her hand, she witnessed the metal reforming to cover the gap. Sadly, a quick look at the O2 gauge confirmed that all the air inside had been lost.
?Gonna need to get River to check that before we dive today.?
The fairy scratched her head, her fingers playing with one of the cogs she used to tie her short pink hair into twintails. Who could have done this? The more she thought about it, the more she realised it could have been just about anyone. There wasn?t a fairy in Gensokyo who could turn down the urge to cause a little trouble.
The snoring coming from a nearby bush served as a better hint.
Briar poked her head into the foliage. Another fairy in a long yellow dress had curled up into a ball, her wings fluttering up and down in time with her breaths. One of the nocturnal fairies, Briar thought to herself. She could do anything she liked and the girl would probably stay asleep.
This was an opportunity she planned to exploit.
After ten minutes of careful shuffling and tying, Briar had successfully wrapped half of the nearby twigs around the fairy?s wings. They heaved as she snored, but they remained unable to move against their newfound bonds. Briar let herself out, smirking as she slipped on her fins. She?d just got herself some payback for the damaged tank.
Maybe. If the fairy hadn?t been responsible - well, she?d played a fun little trick, so that was worth celebrating too.
?Alright. Better head to the spot, then. River?s probably mad by now.?
Briar leaped upwards, allowing her wings to keep her aloft. She gained height, soaring above the bushes and even the trees, before she began her journey towards the usual meeting place. She could make it there with her eyes closed now - the water called to her, with a quiet but alluring voice.
Come here, Briar...I?ve got some shiny treasure for you!
And that was an offer no fairy worth her salt could turn down.
-----
They called it the Crystal Waters.
She?d heard the name from a passing youkai while she was making preparations once. The name didn?t mean anything to her, ultimately. It was basically the largest puddle she?d ever seen in her life, and she knew a puddle when she saw one.
But it wasn?t just wide - it was deep, too. Briar honestly didn?t know how far down it went. Two hundred meters? Five hundred? A thousand? She had no way of telling, but the thought of it just got her excited. After all, the deeper it was, the better the reward at the bottom had to be.
Briar was later than usual when the waters came into view. She made out a pale green speck sitting at the side, and brought herself down to meet it. She spiraled downwards, arms folded for extra flair, before swooping down until her dress?s frills ran along the grass beneath her. She came to a stop inches in front of the green dot, which in truth was another fairy.
?Six out of ten, Briar.?
Briar?s shoulders drooped. ?Six? But that was awesome!?
River Moss didn?t go into detail on her marking system, simply shrugging her shoulders. She was tending to her own tank right now, blowing into the mouthpiece to fill it up. Briar wasn?t sure quite how she did it - River had said her power was manipulation of air pressure or something complicated like that, but whatever it was it worked.
?When you?re done with that, can you gimme a refill too?? Briar placed her tank on the ground, rolling it over until it prodded at River?s leg. River sighed, pulling her green dress out from under the cylinder. Her clothes were covered in vines, and she took care not to leave Briar?s tank punctured for the second time today.
?Let me guess. You dropped it again?? River asked, rolling her eyes.
?That only happened once,? Briar said, defiant.
?You only admitted it once. There?s a difference.?
?Just do it, okay??
River let out a long, heaving sigh. ?Alright. But you?d better pay me extra.?
?I told you, you?ll get an even cut with the rest of us when we find the treasure.?
River raised an eyebrow. A strand of her dark blue hair fell over her face. ?You mean you?re giving me the same cut as Dandy??
?Hey, if you wanna go home soaking wet tonight, be my guest.?
River?s face scrunched up, and she got back to blowing air into her tank. When she was done, she started giving Briar?s tank the same treatment. It?d take her a few minutes to get it up to full capacity, and Briar took a walk around while she waited.
The trees at the edges of the Crystal Waters looked comfortable. She?d tried to sleep in a tree once, but the branch couldn?t stand the weight of her tank and she woke up with her face pressed against the dirt. River had taken the opportunity to call her fat, of course. Briar would have kicked her out of the team if only her ability wasn?t so helpful.
?Eh??
The bushes besides Briar rustled. Briar was on edge, holding her arms out to scare off an attacker, but the shuffling stopped. She stepped towards the source nervously, watching her step up until she heard the whispers coming from inside the bush.
?I?m not late, I?m not late, I?m not late...?
Briar groaned. She plunged an arm into the bush, grabbed at its occupant, and tugged her out.
?Meep-!?
Dandelion made no attempt to fight back as Briar pulled her into the open. Her pure white dress was covered in fallen leaves and the seeds sewn into it were caked in mud. A quick dive would wash that all off. The flower on her head drooped as she looked away, murmuring in whispers.
?S-Sorry...someone hid my dress in the treetops while I was asleep...?
Briar gave the fairy a little pat on the head, opening up the petals on her flower. Dandy buried her face in Briar?s chest, sniffling and sobbing all the while. Normally fairies weren?t attached to their dresses, but they were an important part of a Diver Fairy?s apparel.
?Well it?s a good thing you found it,? Briar said as she gave Dandy one last headpat. ?How else are you disguise yourself as a jellyfish? Gotta keep those predators from eating us, y?know.?
Dandy nodded, wiping away her last few tears. She was already dressed in her gear, which was of course white to match her outfit. Briar had made sure only to ?borrow? tanks that were colour co-ordinated with her teammates. Fashion was one of a fairy?s top priorities, along with shiny objects and prank-pulling.
?You can clean yourself off before we get started,? Briar said, shoving Dandy into the water. The fairy only let out a little yelp before she splashed beneath the surface, vanishing in a cloud of bubbles before disappearing completely.
Thirty seconds later, she hadn?t surfaced.
?Eh, she?ll be fine,? Briar said to herself, shrugging. She looked back over to her other companion. ?Hey, River! Is that tank ready yet??
The cylinder flew through the air and hit Briar in the face. Given how heavy the tank was, she could only assume the answer was yes. She put it on after the world had stopped spinning, then did it again after realising she had the tank upside-down.
River was already prepared, sitting at the lakeside and scooping up water on her fin. As she came close, Briar could hear the fairy muttering something about meeting her contact. That?s silly. Why would she be meeting a contact lens?
Shortly afterward, Dandy finally rose above the water, soaked right through. Her dress was spotless, but her short white hair had drooped over her face. She spat out strands of it as she pulled herself ashore.
?B-Briar, that was mean...?
Briar put a hand on her shoulder. ?It was for the greater good, Dandy. You?re clean now, right??
Dandy gasped, nodded, and made no attempt to argue. She was loyal, useful, and willing to keep working no matter how many pranks Briar played on her. In short, she was the perfect subordinate. Briar was proud to have her on the team.
?OK, you two. You ready??
Briar took her tank?s mouthpiece and bit down on it. River did the same at her side, giving her a thumbs up. Dandy had to scramble around to find hers, but eventually followed suit.
Showtime!
Briar put her arms around her teammates as she tipped forwards, pushing them into the water alongside her.
The latest expedition of the Diver Fairies had begun.
-----
The surroundings were, admittedly, very pretty.
Briar?s first few expeditions hadn?t gone very far, because the sheer number of shiny objects floating around in the water made it impossible to focus on the job. There were fish with scales that ran through every colour of the rainbow, and pearls in oysters that glistened beautifully. (They weren?t to be taken, though. Briar had found that out herself the hard way. Even now, her fingers ached at the sight of the oyster.)
The three fairies swam downward into the depths, flapping their wings now and again for propulsion. If anyone had asked them how the physics behind the motion worked, they would have all asked what exactly a ?physics? was. Whatever it was, fairies didn?t need it.
There were larger fish in these waters they had to be wary of. There were eels that tried to slip under their dresses, jellyfish that poked them in the nose with stingers, and sharks who saw fairies as nothing but an afternoon snack. Dandy had never quite recovered after that incident, still clinging to Briar?s hand as the trio descended.
The sunlight fell away quickly, and the fairies were left with nothing but the sounds of their own gurgles. This was the small blind spot between the multiple levels of the Crystal Waters. A little further down, the walls were covered with pale green crystals that shone and gave them light to swim by - until they made it that deep, they were basically blind. It?d be fine as long as nothing else happened to be in the way - the blindness lasted for thirty seconds at most.
It was at this point Briar?s head collided with someone?s chest.
?Hey, watch it!?
A familiar voice snapped at Briar. Dandy yelped, letting go of her hand and charging off to the side. There was another gurgle as she swam straight into a nearby wall.
Right in front of her face, Briar couldn?t see much. She and whoever she?d crashed into continued downwards, and the light of the wall crystals let her see again. She could see two mounds, bouncing up and down slightly as their owner pulled back.
?Jeez, it?s like you?re aiming for me or something.?
Jozu Manou shielded her chest as she righted herself, blushing a little. She was one of the resident youkai - in fact, she was the shark who had left Dandy so traumatised a few weeks back. She?d promised not to do it again, noting that fairies tasted too much like glitter.
Briar took out her mouthpiece. ?Morning, toothie lady!? She gave the shark a proud salute, floating above her in the water to meet the shark eye-to-eye. River followed on soon afterward, giving Jozu a small nod. The shark smirked back.
?So are you three going on another adventure??
?Of course!? Briar puffed out her chest. ?We get a little deeper with every dive, so we?re gonna find that treasure eventually!?
Jozu chuckled. ?Without a doubt, kid. I believe in you.? She ruffled Briar?s hair roughly, forcing a squeak out of the fairy. At her side, River smirked behind her mouthpiece.
?Though, where?s the third stooge?? Jozu asked, looking around the water. ?I thought you divers came in threes.?
?Oh, Dandy?? Briar pointed to a nearby rock formation. A single flower poked over the top, along with a few strands of white hair. ?She?s come up with a few hiding spots on the way down. None of them really work.?
Jozu frowned. ?I said sorry, didn?t I? She doesn?t need to hold a grudge that long.?
Briar nodded in agreement. Honestly, Dandy had taken this whole thing a little too far. Jozu had apologised at length for swallowing her, but the fairy still wasn?t willing to come anywhere near her. It was becoming an embarrassment.
?I?ll have some words with her tonight,? Briar said. What she meant was ?I?m going to pull pranks on her until she grows a spine.? Jozu grinned again, seeing the meaning behind her words.
??Attagirl. Anyway, I?ll leave you three to get on with it. Good luck.?
Jozu broke for the surface, through the blind spot and up towards the sunlight. As Briar watched her leave, she noticed the shark looking down on her with an almost teasing smile. Briar lowered an eyebrow. What was so funny?
River spat out her mouthpiece. ?You should probably breathe soon.?
?Ah-? Briar gasped, grabbing her regulator and biting down on it again. She took several long breaths to make up for the five minutes she?d spent airless. It was strange, though. Wasn?t she meant to feel a need to breathe when she was running low on air?
Eh, whatever. I guess I?m just too awesome to drown.
Dandy finally emerged from her hiding spot and reunited with her teammates. She was still looking upwards, waiting for Jozu to swoop down and bite her arm off. She never did, though.
Anyway, where were we?
Briar pointed down. They had reached the second Stratum of the Crystal Waters - they had no idea how many layers the place actually had, but someday Briar vowed they would reach the last one. The best shinies were always at the hardest spots.
As she kicked her way further into the depths, there was a glint of avarice in her eyes.
-----
River?s eyes darted across the water as she dove deeper down. She?d played the part as well as she could. She had been worried that Briar might catch on after her conversation with Jozu, but as usual Briar was too headstrong to think it through.
Not like River. She?d caught onto the truth a while ago, and it made for a great cover story. She?d be fine as long as the other two stayed oblivious.
The second Stratum had a very different atmosphere from the first. The glowing crystals at the side gave the whole place an eerie aura, and if that was all there was for River to focus on then she might even have been scared.
The sound of fairies playing in the distance counteracted that fear.
?Got your tail!?
?Hey, I need those shells! Gimme them back!?
?...Eight, Nine, Ten! Ready or not, here I come!?
River?s face brightened. It was good to know that fairies could be found in every part of Gensokyo - even if down here they had fish-tails and shell-bras. The merfairies had taken ownership of a cave built into one of the walls, and their frolicking echoed out into the rest of the Stratum.
First of all, she would need to distract her teammates. That would be simple enough. She pulled out her mouthpiece, and pointing straight down.
?Hey, is that a brand new fifty-yen coin??
Briar?s eyes shone. ?Coin? Where?!? She flew downwards into the depths, tugging Dandelion along behind her. River allowed herself to chuckle at the sight for a moment. The poor girl was so exploitable.
Now that any witnesses were out of the way, River slipped through the mouth of the cavern. There were a few metres of tunnel before she reaches the actual cave - and right away, her eyes were assaulted with the shining of pearls that the merfairies had collected over the last few months. Pictures had been carved into the walls, drawings of sharks and eels with big googly eyes. One side of the room held a giant oyster - right now it was closed, and River could hear snoring sounds echoing from inside.
Hundreds of fairies swam about the water, playing with one another and giggling. This was their safe haven, where there was no need to fear a monster gulping them up whole. They could play and dance and sing without a care in the world.
If River had her way, the fairies would be doing something a lot more productive.
She swam through the room, eyes scanning her surroundings. She got one or two looks, but most of the merfairies were too busy with their own business to pay any attention to her. She squinted, trying to make out any distinct features, but when it came down to it most fairies looked strangely similar to each other.
?Psst.?
A whisper came from the side. Turning around, River saw a merfairy sitting in the corner of the room. The beret on her head was enough to separate her from the rest of the crowd. She beckoned River towards her with a finger. River swam through, pushing several fairies to the side, and took a seat across from her.
?Good morning, Jacqueline,? River said.
Jacqueline Cousteau - Jacky for short - didn?t respond right away. Her expression remained impossibly strict as she shuffled her beret, showing a hint of brown hair beneath. Her wings looked like a fusion between River?s long, soft wings and a fish?s fins. Her tail was a light blue, and it flapped up to slap at the ground.
?Bonjour, mademoiselle.? Jacky answered. Her voice was horribly accented, and sometimes she spoke in a language River could neither make head nor tail of. Regardless, she was one of River?s closest allies.
?How is the Resistance faring?? River asked.
?Eet eez difficult,? Jacky said with a shrug. ?Ze commoners are too busy with zeir jewels and zeir playthings. Zey cannot see we are being oppressed by ze youkai masses.?
River nodded, their eyes both blazing with intent. Until she?d met Jacky, River had thought herself the only sane fairy in Gensokyo. There were so many fairies compared to the youkai that taking over the country would be laughably simple. She had tried to arrange for a rebellion among the fairies above the surface, but she was out-prioritised by things like butterflies and kittens.
In Jacky, she had finally found someone who understood. Jacky could speak at length about her beliefs, although most of her speech was in that weird language that River didn?t speak. Whatever she was saying, though, she was saying it with a lot of emotion. The two of them had been meeting in private to make war plans.
So far, things had not been going well.
?Where are your friends?? Jacky asked. ?Are zey still unaware??
?Of course,? River answered with a smug grin. ?They still think we need to breathe like the humans do. Can you imagine?? She chuckled, and even Jacky managed a small smile. ?I?ll let them know when we have our army assembled. I almost managed to recruit someone yesterday, but at the last minute she got distracted by a four-leaf clover.?
?A shame. I will continue my work with zese fairies.? Jacky saluted. ?Glory to La Resistance!?
?Uh, yes. Glory to...Lah Rezeestonce.? River mumbled the words without knowing what they meant. What was she saying? They couldn?t arrange a war together if they didn?t share a language.
Getting out was as easy as getting in, luckily. No-one paid River any mind as she left. She could try convincing them to join her cause, but she didn?t imagine it would be any more successful than her efforts on the surface. Best to focus on her natural habitat and let Jacky deal with the merfairies.
As she came to the mouth of the cave, River bit her lip. A figure was floating around outside, twiddling her thumbs and mumbling to herself.
?Uuuu...River, where are you??
Dandy had come back for her. How had she broken away from Briar?s grip so quickly? River took a moment to calm down, then focused on acting natural as she swam back out. ?Sorry, I lost you guys. Did you find the coin??
?Uh-uhh.? Dandy shook her head. ?Briar is still sure it?s down there, so she went ahead on her own. But we had no idea what happened to you, so I came back to check.?
It would have been endearing if only it hadn?t been so frustrating. River had to keep her recruitment strictly secret. If the youkai overlords found out what she was doing, she knew that The Man would come down on her like an iron press.
...Why did they call it The Man, anyway? Given the power balance in Gensokyo, The Woman seemed more appropriate.
?Um, River,? Dandy said, looking away as her headflower twirled about. ?Can I ask you a question??
River gulped, glad that Dandy couldn?t see her sweat while she was underwater. ?Sure, go ahead.?
?W-Well, the thing is...? Dandy picked up her mouthpiece and looked at it. ?I sort of forgot about this for a while, but I don?t feel like I?m drowning or anything. Why is that??
Crap.
Dandy was onto her. For all of her typical incompetence, she had a strange ability to realise the obvious. That was a rare gift among fairies, and exactly what River was most afraid of.
Luckily, Dandy was as manipulable as a ball of clay. River put on her serious face.
?That?s because you don?t feel anything. For ages you?ll be able to talk and it?ll be just fine, but then suddenly your whole body will feel really really warm...? She brought her hands close together, and Dandy?s eyes were trained on them.
?And then, BOOM!? River pulled her hands out as she screamed, forcing Dandy to flinch. ?Your whole body goes pop! They?ll be scraping little bits of Dandelion off the walls for weeks.?
Dandy squealed, and promptly put her mouthpiece back on. After taking a quick breath, she took it off again, looking at River with misty eyes.
?T-Thank you, River...I might have blown up if it wasn?t for you...?
River gave the girl a little pat on the shoulder. ?Hey, we Diver Fairies have to stick together.? She grinned darkly while Dandy wasn?t looking. Sucker.
Their little embrace was interrupted by a stream of bubbles coming up from below. River looked beneath her with a frown. That was more than just the exhaust from Briar?s breathing.
?So she?s busted the tank again.?
Dandy nodded, lips forming a little ring as she looked into the depths. A pink speck came into view, rapidly growing larger.
?...crap, crap, crap, crap, crap!?
Briar?s tank had a massive scratch in it, and air was bubbling out freely. She didn?t even notice her teammates as she whizzed by them, charging towards the surface. River shrugged, casually swimming up behind her, with Dandy following suit for lack of anything better to do.
River had what she?d came for, anyway. Jacky was still hard at work, and one day Lah Rezeestonce would make fairies the most powerful force in Gensokyo.
Whatever Lah Rezeestonce was.
-----
?Haaaaaaah!?
Briar took in a huge gulp of air as she broke the surface. The journey must have taken her ten minutes, and she hadn?t been able to breathe for the whole time. Her life had flashed before her eyes - all the friends she?d made, the kittens she?d snuggled, the pranks she?d pulled - but against all odds, she?d made it out in time.
?Haah...hauu...I forgot how dangerous this job could be.?
She?d been so busy looking for that coin that she accidentally dragged her tank against a sharp rock. The wreck of a tank was still clinging to her back as she pulled herself ashore. She unstrapped the tank, rolling it about to look at the puncture. If anything, it was worse than the damage she?d had to deal with this morning, to the point where any sensible engineer would have written it off.
Briar was not an engineer, and she was most definitely not sensible.
?Work, dammit!?
Her way with machines usually involved convincing them to co-operate with threats of violence. For some reason, whenever she struck an object that wasn?t working, it seemed to come back together again. River had called it ?percussive maintenance? once, but Briar didn?t know what either of those words meant. She just knew that if she punched things, they got fixed.
As she smacked her palm against the crack, the metal slithered out to repair the damage. It took a couple of minutes of focused hammering, but eventually the tank was as good as new. She planted it down beside her, beaming in satisfaction at her own work.
She then promptly wrapped her arms around herself as the water chill struck her.
?Jeez, that?s cold...?
Briar?s dress clung to her body, and she shivered as she flapped her wings dry. Dandy surfaced just in time for the spray to catch her in the face.
?Hyauu!? She put up a hand to shield herself before climbing up on shore. River appeared moments later, also hugging herself to protect from the newfound cold.
?Dandy, feel like working your magic?? Briar asked once her teeth had stopped chattering. Dandy nodded, and the three fairies came together in a huddle. Dandy puckered her lips up and blew, letting off a soft whistle as a breeze came to life around them. The wind blew at every inch of their bodies, passing through one of Briar?s ears and out the other. By the time Dandy stopped whistling their clothes were completely dry, and the grass around them was much damper than it had been thirty seconds ago.
?That?s more like it.? Briar stretched her arms and flapped her wings before planting her empty tank at River?s feet. ?Y?know the drill. We?ve still got time for two or three more dives before the sun sets.?
River groaned. ?Can?t we have a break? I have some people to convert-I mean, converse with.?
Briar waved a finger inches from her partner?s face. ?Don?t you remember the oath you swore when you became a Diver Fairy? You promised that you would do all that you could to find the treasure at the bottom of the Crystal Waters.?
?Yeah, and you promised to give me a lifetime?s supply of candy if I joined you.?
?Politics is a harsh mistress. What matters is that you swore the oath and now you can?t take it back.?
River grumbled, sitting down and working on refilling Briar?s tank. Fairies didn?t make oaths often, and when they did they had to stick by them no matter how unpleasant the circumstances. Now that Briar thought about it, maybe that was why River didn?t like her that much.
Dandy poked her on the shoulder. ?Uh, Briar, can I ask a question??
Briar grinned, puffing out her chest. ?Shoot.?
?This treasure we?re looking for...what is it??
Briar blinked. She hadn?t thought about it. She scratched her head as she tried to give an answer.
?It?s...awesome.?
Dandy tilted her head. ?Awesome??
?Yeah, too awesome to describe. It would blow your ears off if I tried to put it into words.?
Dandy nodded, letting out a small oooh. She was easily impressed, but then again Briar was cool enough to impress most of her fellow fairies. Even the toothie lady liked her, although Jozu did seem to laugh at her a lot for reasons she hadn't figured out yet.
That said, Dandy?s question did leave Briar thinking for a while. She really had no idea what the treasure at the bottom of the Crystal Waters was. In fact, it was possible that there wasn?t even any treasure there at all. What would she do then?
A moment of thought was rare for Briar, and when it ended she felt content about it. Maybe there wasn?t any sort of treasure in these waters. But even if there wasn?t, she was having fun looking for it, and she had two good friends to go searching with. (Well, one good friend. She wasn?t sure where River sat in the equation.)
She felt a new wave of enthusiasm as River handed her tank back. She didn?t even throw it at Briar?s face this time around.
?OK, Briar. We?re ready to go when you are.?
As Briar strapped the tank back on, she looked to her other side. Dandy was taking deep breaths, readying herself for the next dive. There was a small smile on her face up until she bit down on her mouthpiece.
For an instant, Briar wondered if it would be best if they never reached the bottom Stratum. That way they?d be able to continue these adventures together forever.
She quickly turned down that thought. What if there was something shiny down there? Like, really shiny, shinier than any other shiny Gensokyo had ever seen before?
?Alright, ladies,? Briar said, picking up her mouthpiece. ?Let?s go for another dip!?
She bit down and fell forward, splashing into the water again. Two splashes came from her sides as River and Dandy fell in tandem with her. The trio began on another mission to visit the deepest point of the Crystal Waters. In truth, they would probably fail, just like they?d failed every other time.
But an expedition that didn?t get to the bottom wasn?t a failure, Briar thought to herself. It was just a bonding exercise.
-
Jacqueline Cousteau
ear-to-ear grin right here
-
I'm not sure if I've ever said this before...
But I love River; smart little fairy. ^^
Jozu laughing at a completely oblivious Briar just continues to get a giggle out of me.
And where do I start about the 'Rezeestonce?' This is fun! I need more diver fairies! XD
-
These fairies charmed my socks off. Actually, y'know what, I just really liked everything about this fic. :3
-
BONUS FEATURE:
So I'm really quite liking the diver fairies, and I asked Stuffman if he felt up for some requestin'. He went above and beyond, and I'm pretty much loving these. (They're a little too large for size limits, so I'll have to link them.)
First off, a trio of designs! (http://i.imgur.com/QgI2h.jpg) From left to right it's River, Briar, and Dandy.
Second, another request I asked for after the first - footage from one of the team's first dives. (http://i.imgur.com/mpizB.jpg) Briar would go on to insist the entire thing was a learning experience.
Thanks again, Stuff. These are awesome. :D
-
They are made of dorbl--
...
Dandy's flower. how did I not notice it when I first clicked X3
-
Another pic! (http://i.imgur.com/nE7o1.jpg) This time from Aoshi.
Yeah, I'll stop now. I think I'm getting awfully carried away with these fairies. :P
-
Note: If you haven't read this (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,1681.msg787207.html#msg787207), the story might make a little less sense. But considering it's the same OC-laden stuff I usually write, it probably doesn't matter that much. :V
-----
Sometimes Sango wished she wasn?t so good at her work.
She?d been the self-proclaimed guardian of these lakes for longer than she could recall. For months, she had made it her duty to keep these waters clean and fresh, and she had done her job brilliantly. With every day she found a new shortcut, a better route, a way to get her work done a little bit faster.
The only problem was that at some point, she?d become too fast. She would have the lakes in tip-top shape before the morning was over, which meant she was left to her own devices. Food wasn?t an issue - she just helped herself to some of the kelp and seaweed growing along the bottom of the lakes. She had spent a few weeks trying to become a connoisseur on the subject, able to identify every branch and type of weed the lakes had to offer.
She had caught herself halfway through that idea, realising that it was the most boring thing she?d ever thought of.
?Why is there nothing to do around here??
Sango muttered to herself, kicking up small splashes of water as she sat at the side of the lake. She looked down into the water, every little rock and pebble engraved into her head. She had seen everything there was to see. Not just in this lake, but in every lake surrounding it. She?d met every fish, tried every delicacy, looked through every nook and cranny. The lakes didn?t have much left to offer her.
She?d tried taking a walk around the mountain, but ultimately there wasn?t much to see. The kappa had made their homes around the foot of the mountain, but after she?d seen one crackpot invention pouring steam out of the roof she?d seen them all. Most of the kappa were too caught up in their own studies and experiments to pay Sango any mind. Nitori was the main exception, but that was because she was trying to make business with the dolphin, blissfully unaware that Sango hadn?t made a single penny in her entire life.
The mountain itself wasn?t an option either. Sango was...well, she was a dolphin, and she was more at home in water than in air. This was doubly so when said air was several hundred feet above solid ground. She?d never been a fan of heights, and even looking at the mountain could make her dizzy if she focused too hard. She preferred to keep to the earth. Or the water. You couldn?t fall in the water.
She could try out Koishi?s vagabond routine and explore the nation on foot, but that had never appealed to her. Gensokyo was too large for her liking. There was too much to see, and it was too easy to get lost. And besides that, she always felt a little out of place on dry land. Water was where she belonged, and she kept to it when she could.
That left only one possibility in Sango?s head. She had met a shark youkai some time ago who came from well beyond the lakes of the mountain. Sango had heard about her home many times in the past - a new area known as the Crystal Waters, full of sparkling water and fish of every colour. It was deep enough to make Sango?s lakes look like puddles, and the thought of seeing all those new animals was enough to bring a smile to her face.
The smile quickly faded when she remembered how long a trip that was. It?d take her an hour of walking, and that was assuming she knew which way to go. And even if she did take the journey, her need to breathe every so often made sure she couldn?t stay under for long. It wasn?t worth the effort, she decided.
So she was left with nothing to do but engage in staring contests with the fish of the lake. None of them were looking back at her, but she considered that a victory by default on her part. She was so focused on her one-sided staredown that she never heard the footsteps coming up behind her.
?Um, excuse me-?
?Phweeaah!?
Sango flinched, pushing herself forward just enough to shift her centre of gravity. Her arms flew out to try and stop herself, achieving nothing as she fell into the water with a plop. She surfaced a few seconds later, turning about towards the mystery voice.
?Don?t sneak up on me like that, okay??
The girl looking back at her wasn?t a figure that Sango recognised. She wouldn?t have forgotten hair like that - long and green, running down to her waist. She was in her teens, dressed in a shrine maiden?s formal garb, and a long snake hairpiece was slithering about on one side of her head. That caught Sango?s attention, and for a while she could only look at the twirling snake. The girl either wasn?t aware of it, or was ignoring it entirely.
?Oh, apologies,? the girl said, backing off with her hands outstretched. ?You seemed very focused, and I wasn?t sure how to get your attention. Can I assume you are Sango Tororetsu??
Sango raised an eyebrow. ?Who?s asking??
The girl?s eyes widened in disbelief, her expression silently asking ?can she REALLY not know?? A moment later the look vanished, and she gave Sango an honourable bow.
?I am Sanae Kochiya, faithful servant of the mountain goddess Kanako Yasaka. I?m to understand we owe you our thanks.?
Sango gasped. She?d heard stories of the gods that lived at the top of the mountain, but she?d never met any of them in person. Sanae knelt down, cupping her hand and scooping up some water. It glinted as the light struck it, without a hint of impurity.
?Lady Yasaka?s influence doesn?t make it this far down the mountain. You?ve been keeping it clean of your own volition, correct??
The dolphin nodded. Somewhere at the back of her head she felt like this was the sort of recognition she?d been seeking for a long time, but the desire seemed to have faded away at some point. She shrugged. Either way, it was nice to feel respected.
?That?s about right.? Sango pulled herself out of the water to stand eye-to-eye with Sanae. ?I don?t exactly tell everyone about it, though. How?d you find out??
Sanae sighed. ?A strange young girl came to the shrine a few days ago and told us about you. I think she may have been a satori, if that means anything to you.?
?Oh.? Sango grumbled. That was all she needed to know. Koishi, couldn?t you have at least told me about this...?
?Anyway.? Sanae dug into a small bag she carried over her shoulder. She squirmed about as she searched, and Sango noticed her hand falling in further than space should have physically allowed. Eventually she pushed her entire arm into a bag that was only large enough to fit her hand.
?Lady Moriya keeps too many of these trinkets in here. She really needs to clean it up once in a while.? She stopped, and her eyes lit up. ?Ah, here we are.?
Sango was too stunned by Sanae?s magic trick to see what she was pulling out. Sanae had to click her fingers to get the dolphin?s attention and show her the flower currently sitting in her palm. It was violet, spreading out to a clear white at the edges of its petals.
?This is a present from the Moriya Shrine as a boon for all of your efforts.?
Sango tilted her head as she picked up the flower. It felt alive, even though it had obviously been cut from its stem. It was still damp to the touch, and as she put it to her hair it fit snugly into place as if there was a hole in her head for it.
?Uh, thanks. But why a flower??
Sanae giggled. ?If you blow on it, you might understand.?
That just made Sango even more confused. Regardless, she did as she was told, taking the flower off and blowing at it. As she did so, the petals folded inwards, stretching out and taking on the form of a small tube with mouthgrips at the bottom. It was a snorkel - Sango recognised the design from something Nitori had been trying to sell her a few days earlier - but rather than having a hole at the top for air, it had another, smaller flower.
?Give it a try,? Sanae said, unable to contain her own excitement. Still not sure what the fuss was about, Sango bit down on the snorkel and took a breath.
She couldn?t hide her gasp. Just to be sure, she blocked the lid of the snorkel with her palm. When that changed nothing, she jumped into the water and took another breath. The flower on the tip of the snorkel shuffled up and down in time with her breaths, but every breath was as full and fresh as the first. She surfaced, looking to Sanae for an explanation.
?We thought that as a dolphin you might feel a little left out from all the underwater antics,? the shrine maiden said, sounding almost as happy as Sango was. ?You can dismiss it by pushing in the flower at the top. The other form?s much easier to carry around. Either way, this should take care of your air-breathing problem, shouldn?t it??
Sango was dumbstruck. This was the perfect gift for her - it opened up all sorts of paths she couldn?t have taken before. Definitely Koishi?s fault, she thought to herself. She pulled herself out of the water again, following Sanae?s instructions. As she pushed the flower in the snorkel collapsed inside of it, and it grew in size until she was holding the original flower in her palm again.
?This is...I really have no idea what to say. Thanks a lot.? She almost hugged Sanae right then, but realised at the last minute it?d be awkward to hug a girl she?d only just met. ?Though, can I ask you one question??
Sanae nodded. ?Ask away??
Sango felt a wave of determination rise in her. ?Can you tell me how to get to the Crystal Waters from here??
-----
Neither girl was paying much attention to their surroundings. Even if they were, there were certain things that the people of Gensokyo had learned not to pay much mind to.
Fairies were one of those things. Even so, the fairy poking her head out from behind a bush would have seemed a little out of the ordinary by fairy standards. The oxygen tank on her back and flippers on her feet accounted for that.
River Moss had been in a foul mood when she had happened upon this conversation. She had stepped away from her duties for a ?lunch break?, which was of course an excuse to find more followers for the upcoming revolution. As always, she?d been unsuccessful. Sometimes she wondered if she was the only sane fairy in Gensokyo. Why didn?t anyone else want to bring down the youkai populace in a rain of cleansing fire?
This discussion had caught her attention, though. A youkai with an artifact that let the user breathe underwater, and she was on her way to the Crystal Waters right now? It was a massive opportunity on two counts - it would help the diver fairies reach their goal of plumbing the depths of the waters, and an artifact with that much power would be sure to win the revolution some followers.
The human and the youkai finished their discussion, and the dolphin set off on her way. River rose to her feet right away, feeling a leaf lodge itself between the hem of her dress and her neck. She didn?t have time to get rid of it. She had to get back to base and warn Briar before this chance passed them by.
As an emerald blur zipped through the air above her, the dolphin didn?t so much as turn her head.
-----
?Huuu.?
Briar surfaced for the third time today, water dripping from her hair. She spat out the mouthpiece, falling backwards and floating across the surface of the water. Technically the weight of her tank should have pushed her under again, but she had never considered the idea and thus it didn?t affect her.
A few seconds later Dandelion?s head popped up at her side. The flower-headed fairy immediately turned to Briar for guidance. When their dives ended Briar was the one to offer an official debriefing on their progress. There wasn?t much to report today - as usual, they?d run out of air somewhere in the Second Stratum, and made one long break for the surface. By now the fairies were so used to being without air that the feeling wasn?t even scary anymore.
?Dandy,? Briar said, reaching out and patting her companion on the head. ?We need to talk.?
Dandy?s eyes widened, and she dipped her head back under the water. The flower on her head still poked above the surface, drooping so low that it almost folded in on itself. Briar bit her lip.
?Ah, no, I?m not firing you! We just need to have a serious strategy meeting. I had an idea after that last expedition.?
A pair of eyes rose up from the waters. Dandy nodded, following right behind Briar as they headed for the edge of the water. They pulled themselves to shore for the third time in a day. Morning had finally come to an end, and Briar pulled off her tank and fins as she sat down. Even the mighty leader of the diver fairies needed a break once in a while.
Dandelion did her job without being asked, letting out a small whistle. A wind blew through Briar?s dress, lifting the water that had soaked it through and sending it spiraling across the grass in hefty puddles. Briar gave her a nod, then motioned for Dandy to sit down beside her.
?So, um, what was your idea?? Dandy asked, looking away. She was allergic to looking people in the eye, and Briar was used to looking at the side of her head. She was a great addition to the team for her magic alone - and given that most fairies were too busy with serious matters like counting the leaves on every tree in Gensokyo, Briar was grateful for every teammate she could get.
?Well, I?ve been watching our progress,? Briar started, standing up again and stomping about. She fluttered upwards, her feet ?standing? on air as she walked around Dandy. Being tall made her look more important, but four feet wasn?t quite tall enough in her opinion. ?We?re making decent progress through the first Stratum. The toothie lady has put us on good terms with the fish around there, so they aren?t a problem.?
She raised two fingers into the air. ?It?s the second Stratum that we?re having trouble with. In particular, it?s all those shiny crystals they?ve got in the walls. How are we supposed to resist their shinicity?? She?d been learning all the big words that leaders were expected to use.
Dandy tilted her head. ?But isn?t it just you that?s getting distracted? You always pull me along and-?
?Dammit, Dandy!? Briar shouted, knocking Dandelion back a few inches with her voice alone. ?I?m not here to crunch numbers and deal with details. I just wanna figure out what?s at the bottom of that lake, and if we wanna do that we?re all going to need to make a few sacrifices. Do you have a problem with that??
Dandy clamped her mouth shut, shaking her head wildly. Briar smiled. It was good to see her charisma at work.
?OK, so the plan is that we make the next dive blindfolded.?
Silence.
?...Eh??
?Think about it,? Briar continued, in awe of her own genius. ?If we can?t see the shinies then we can?t get distracted by them, right? We?d only need them for the second Stratum onwards, maybe less if it turns out there aren?t any shinies to look at.? She had to bow at her own brilliance, though she nearly whacked Dandy in the head as she bent down.
Dandy still seemed unsure. ?But, uh, doesn?t that mean we won?t be able to see? We?ll swim into walls and stuff.?
Briar shrugged. ?Collateral damage.? She spoke with such force, such conviction, that any other concerns Dandy had faded away in her throat. Briar took that as a sign she agreed. ?Now, there?s one problem - I think blindfolds loosen up when they?re wet, so we?d need to come up with some other way of doing it-?
?Briar!?
A voice from above caught both of them off guard. River swooped down between the pair, landing in a spot no more than two feet wide. She brushed off leaves on her dress that she?d acquired some time ago.
?Your landing was a five at best,? Briar said, sticking her tongue out. She never gave anyone a higher score than they were willing to give her. That was why Dandy scored eights and nines in spite of her clumsiness.
River didn?t even give her a glance as she caught her breath. ?I?ve got some important news for you. There?s a youkai coming this way that you?ll be very interested in.?
Briar?s eyes widened. She lowered herself to the ground. ?Go on.?
?Well, I was at the youkai mountain, and there was this fishy youkai person who said she was coming here. The thing is, she?s got a snorkel that lets her breathe underwater.?
Briar couldn?t hide her giggling. ?Oh, River, you?re so silly. Snorkels only work on the surface. And fishies can breathe underwater anyway.?
?I know that!? River?s face crumpled up. ?But this is a magical snorkel. It turns into a flower, which means it?s got to do something cool. And like I said, she?s on her way right now. She?s only walking, so it?ll take her about half an hour to get here.?
Briar lost control of her jaw as her mouth hung open. This was a game-changer.
?So you mean...if we get hold of that snorkel, we won?t have to worry about air ever again??
River nodded. Briar could barely believe what she was hearing. It was like the gods of Gensokyo had come together to create an artifact that did everything she could have asked for (which was technically true, but not in the way she was imagining).
?Umm...? Dandy, as usual, was the only one to try and inject common sense into the discussion. ?So do we ask her nicely??
She got two blank stares straight back at her.
?No, you dummy, we?re gonna take it from her,? Briar said.
Dandy pouted. ?But that?s stealing. Only bad little girls do that.?
?We?re not stealing it. We?re just borrowing it indefiminably.?
?Indefinitely,? River said.
?Yeah, that word.?
Dandy still didn?t seem keen on the matter, so Briar reached out and put a hand over her shoulder. ?Look, Dandy, the fishie lady won?t even need the snorkel anyway. She can already breathe underwater, so it?s just going to an owner who can actually use it. What?s wrong with that??
That was the argument that won the day, and finally she nodded in agreement. Briar gave her a pat on the back strong enough to displace a lung.
?Great! Now, if she?s on her way, we?ll need to come up with some sort of plan. Anyone have any ideas??
River smirked. ?Actually, while I was on the way over I took the liberty of coming up with an attack strategy. First of all, I have to give both of your tanks a refill. You?ll need to be in the water for this...?
-----
Sango was starting to wonder how Koishi managed to live like a vagabond. She had been walking for about an hour, and felt like her legs would snap off at any moment.
Swimming for an hour wasn?t a problem, but walking involved a set of muscles she really hadn?t practiced with. Once or twice she?d stopped to take a breath, and she couldn?t shake the feeling someone was watching her. There was dense foliage on all sides, with plenty of room for someone to hide. The lakes didn?t offer hiding spots like that, and this was her first time feeling so exposed.
And then there were the fairies. She walked past at least two dozen of them, minding their own business and flying around without any concern who was in their way. Sango was almost run over twice, and she was covered in the glitter their dresses seemed to give off. She was looking forward to taking a dip and washing all of this away.
At last the Crystal Waters came into sight, and Sango was just about ready to fall into them. She took a look into the water, and immediately felt a pout come to her face. It was as clean and beautiful as the name suggested, and she counted more fish hanging beneath the surface than she?d seen in three of her own lakes. She briefly considered moving, but she decided that it was a bad idea to quit her job on the same day she?d been praised for doing it so well.
She put a hand on the flower she?d placed in her hair. It felt so natural that she wondered if it had been made for her. She blew on it, bringing it out into its true form. She took a few breaths from the snorkel just to be sure that it really did its job.
She was about to get into the water when she heard the voice.
?Help! Someone, help me!?
Sango?s head jerked to the side. A fairy in a long green dress was running towards her with a look of horror on her face. It was the sort of look that Sango couldn?t allow herself to look away from.
?What?s wrong?? she asked.
?Oh, a youkai?? The fairy pointed out into the water. ?Please, you have to help my friend! She crashed into the water by accident, and she can?t swim! If you don?t help her, she?ll-!?
Sango didn?t have time to think. Sheer instinct kicked in, and she leaped forwards with a perfectly executed dive. She hit the water with barely a splash, not losing a moment of speed as she headed towards the disturbance. She saw a figure flailing about, barely keeping her head above water. The flower on her head was flapping about as she tried to gasp for air.
?Haah, aah...hel-ppplbl!?
She wouldn?t be able to stay above water for more than a minute at that rate. Sango came to a stop a few feet away, trying to reach out for her. The fairy kept swiping her away, her hands swinging about in all directions and keeping Sango at bay.
?C-Calm down, okay? I?m here to help!?
She wasn?t going to get anywhere like this. The first priority was to make sure that the fairy could breathe. She looked at the snorkel still hanging in her hand, thinking it over for a moment, before nodding to herself.
?Just take this!?
She brought the snorkel forward, and the fairy bit down on it right away. Sango was surprised at how quickly she took it when she?d been panicking five seconds ago. She calmed down right away, as if she was aware that the snorkel would help her even if she fell under the water. Both of those left Sango a little confused as to what was going on.
Before she could get any further than that, she felt something grab at her ankles.
?Phwee?!?
Sango was caught off guard entirely, losing her grip on the fairy. The girl she?d been trying to rescue dipped under the water, and Sango pulled under to follow her. She found a third fairy in a long pink dress holding her by the ankles, breathing from a tank on her back.
?Briar, dive now!?
The girl in the green dress had grabbed her own tank, and gave Sango a snarky wink as she leaped into the water. At that moment, Sango remembered seeing a green blur in the corner of her eye on the way to the Crystal Waters.
A setup?!
The girl holding her in place let go and swam straight down. Sango chased after her at the first chance she got, but the fairy had more speed than she expected. Clearly she?d done her fair share of swimming, and those fins she wore gave her an extra boost.
Sango would have been able to catch up to her if it wasn?t her first time in these waters. Schools of fish stormed her, eager to meet a newcomer and totally unaware that she was in a hurry. The fairies dived downwards, fading away until they were out of sight entirely. Sango tried to keep up the chase regardless. She glanced at her surroundings - if she had been here in any better circumstances, she would have taken the time to appreciate them. The fish, the coral, the beautiful water - it was a wonderful sight ruined by the fact she had just been robbed.
?Mmh-?
The fairies had just come into view again when Sango felt a pain rising in her chest. They hadn?t just robbed her - they?d robbed her of the one thing she needed to chase them. She grit her teeth, turning around and breaking for the surface again. She brushed past something silver, but she was too busy rising up to pay attention to it.
?Haah-!?
One breath of air later, Sango had decided she didn?t like fairies. The glitter was already frustrating, but getting mugged was another thing entirely. She thought for a moment, looking for a way to catch up to them, but her air-breathing tendencies had got the best of her again. It was time to think of a good excuse in case the mountain gods wanted to know where their artifact had gone.
When someone poked her in the back, she was about ready to turn around and punch them. She stopped herself at the last minute - which was a good move, because punching a shark in the face would have been a terrible idea.
?So that?s how they say hello where you?re from?? Jozu said, frowning. The shark was only poking her head just above water, her gills still churning beneath the surface.
Sango dropped her arm, going bright red. The pair had met during an incident some time ago, and while she wouldn?t call Jozu a good friend she was an acquaintance at the very least. This was not the best way to re-introduce herself.
?Sorry. I just got pickpocketed by a bunch of fairies, so I?m not in the best mood.?
Jozu raised an eyebrow. ?What, Briar and her merry band? Why would they wanna rob you??
?They stole this artifact that would?ve let me breathe underwater, so...?
The shark nodded. She seemed to know the fairies responsible, and she looked regretful as her eyes jumped between Sango and the water. Eventually, she let out a hard sigh.
?Sorry. This is giving you a really bad first impression of my home waters. I think I owe it to you to get your trinket back.?
She raised one hand above the water, offering Sango a thumbs-up. ?Sit tight.? She slipped back beneath the water, diving down in pursuit of the burglars.
Sango spent half a minute treading water, still a little lost with regards to what had happened. She took a deep breath, and with a shrug dropped back into the water again.
If I?m going to have to wait on Jozu, I may as well look around while I?m here.
-----
?Celebrations all around!?
Briar gave high fives to her two companions. River returned the gesture, and Dandy offered a weak flick of the wrist to match. Dandy had been using the snorkel for the whole trip down, and she?d been breathing with perfect ease the whole time. River?s intel had been spot-on, and they made it to the second Stratum without any incident.
?Good work, River,? Briar said in between breaths from her tank. ?That was genius. Hell, even I would have had trouble thinking of that.? From Briar, that was the best compliment imaginable, and River smirked in response.
Without a blindfold to work with, Briar covered her eyes with her hands instead. She assumed her subordinates would follow suit - obviously she was too blind to check. Unlike every time beforehand, she was swimming straight down without a care in the world. They were making three times the progress that they usually made. At this rate, they?d finally make it into the third Stratum.
?Hey, Dandy, is it cool if I take a shot at the snorkel? We?re gonna have to share it anyway.?
She pulled her hand away, looking at Dandy with one eye. The flower-headed fairy gasped, and suddenly turned crimson red. She backed off, looking set to flee at any moment.
?Eh? Dandy, what?s wrong?? Briar asked. Dandy responded by blushing even harder, and just when Briar thought she?d never answer she took the snorkel off and began to speak.
?T-This snorkel...I have to put my lips on it. So if I give it to you, it?s like I?m...indirectly, I?d be...?
She couldn?t finish, and she looked set to cry. Briar felt the blood drain from her face. She hadn?t thought of this.
?Really?? River muttered. ?Come on, it?s just a snorkel. It?s not like you?re really kissing her.?
Briar raised a hand to stop her. ?River, this is serious. This could put our entire mission in jeopardy.?
?...You?re kidding. You agree with this too??
?The Diver Fairies are a respectable group working together for a common cause. This sort of romantic irresponsimability is something I refuse to stand for.?
?But I have to breathe into your tanks to refill them. Isn?t that the same thing??
River?s statement had exactly the opposite effect from what she'd intended. Both Dandy and Briar cringed, their faces glowing as they blushed. The three of them hung in place, and even River couldn?t stay stern with two pitiful expressions coming back at her. Their relationship had reached a new level of awkwardness.
?...We might have to give that snorkel back to the fishy,? Briar said. River and Dandy nodded along with her. For once, the three of them came to a genuine agreement. None of them was willing to make the first move and move towards the surface. They were probably in for a long lecture at best.
Or a charge from a shark at worst.
?Wha-?
Briar was rushed from behind, pushed forward and knocked off balance before someone grabbed her by the edge of her dress. She turned around to see Jozu looking at her with the expression of a disappointed mother.
?You three are gonna come with me. You have some explaining to do.?
Jozu swam up towards the surface, pulling Briar along as her hostage. The two remaining diver fairies followed on behind her, neither of them willing to mess with the dreaded toothie lady.
Briar made a small attempt to fight Jozu off, and made sure to do her fair share of complaining. But in all honesty, she was grateful that Jozu was hauling her in to face judgement. It meant she didn?t have to apologise willingly.
And if there was anything fairies hated doing, it was saying sorry.
-----
How does this place stay so clean, anyway?
Sango raised an eyebrow as she swept around beneath the surface of the Crystal Waters. This place was unnaturally clean, on the same level as the lakes she had to work daily to keep clean. Magic was in play here. She wondered if she had a secret protege at work. Maybe a doppelganger? She?d have to ask Jozu when she showed up.
She stroked at a passing eel, feeling it shiver at her touch. She smiled, feeling like she?d already made a new friend. There was a brilliant coral reef on one side of the water, though she took care not to touch it. She suspected it was sharper than it looked, and if she cut herself Jozu was going to be less sane than usual.
?Hey, lemme go already!?
Sango heard the voice rise up from the depths. Looking down, she saw Jozu coming into view, hauling one of the fairies along by the edge of her dress. Her partners in crime were lagging along behind, and both of them looked completely docile. Sango?s eyes widened. She hadn?t expected Jozu to have that much influence, but the more she thought about it the less it surprised her.
The dolphin and the shark surfaced at once, with the head fairy poking her head out of the water as well. She was pouting so hard Sango almost expected her jaw to fall off, and she couldn?t look the dolphin in the eye. She looked like a child who denied robbing the cookie jar with her hands covered in crumbs.
?OK, Briar,? Jozu said, putting her hand on the fairy's shoulder instead. ?You?ve got something to say to Sango, don?t you??
Briar muttered something so quietly that neither Sango nor Jozu could hear her. Jozu gave her a little shake to try and force the words out of her.
?Right, right, I?m sorry.? Briar looked at Sango with a look of bewilderment. ?I don?t get it. You don?t even need that snorkel. You?re a fish. Why would you need to breathe underwater??
Sango raised an eyebrow. ?Uh...y?know, I?m a dolphin. I still need to breathe air.?
Briar?s face went pale, and Sango heard her mutter ?Crap.? She must not have known about it after all. Sango felt her frustration towards the fairies fade, but only slightly.
The other fairies surfaced - the green-dressed girl who wasn?t willing to look her head-on, and the flower-headed fairy who seemed ready to wilt at any moment. She was brushing off the snorkel, trying to wipe the mouthpiece as if to clean it. She handed it back to Sango, her head bowed so far that she was almost under the water again.
?S-Sorry. We didn?t know you were friends with the toothie lady. We won?t do anything like this to you again, so...?
Briar made no attempt to disagree with her teammate?s apology, but she looked grateful that she didn?t have to say it herself. Jozu let her go as Sango took back the snorkel, moving away and giving the fairies enough room to vacate the premises. The three of them swam off into the distance with their metaphorical tails between their legs. Sango heard Briar mumbling something about how they needed to ?work on that blindfold strategy?.
When they were well out of the way, Jozu turned around and rubbed at her head. ?I?m real sorry about that. They?re harmless most of the time, but you just happened to have something they wanted. Now they know that you?re with me, they?re not gonna mess with you.?
Sango nodded, taking a strong grip of her newest possession. Now she didn?t have to worry about explaining this all to the Moriya Shrine when she got back.
?Thanks, Jozu. Sorry for making you work like this out of nowhere.?
Jozu shrugged. ?Don?t mention it. I?m meant to look after these waters, so it?s just part of the job description.?
The pair smiled at each other for a moment.
?Anyway...? Jozu grinned. ?You wanna take a look around??
Sango nodded, put on the snorkel, and gave Jozu a thumbs-up. This was what she?d come here for, and even if there had been some slight complications she was going to make the most of it. She?d made a long walk to get here, after all, and she wasn?t doing all that work for nothing.
Jozu shared the thumbs up as they both sank under the water. Sango took long puffs from the snorkel, reveling in her newfound ability to breathe. She let Jozu take her by the hand and lead her around.
?Good afternoon, and welcome to Jozu Manou?s official tour of the Crystal Waters. Now, if you look to your left...?
-----
Like I said, I'm really taking a liking to the fairies. :P
This fic also let me resolve something that's bugged me for a while - ever since PLotSS Sango has had a flower in her hair (http://i33.tinypic.com/2vxg7rl.jpg), but I never really explained or used it. Well, here's your explanation for it! :D
Now if you'll excuse me it's coming up to 2am. Man, I haven't done this with a story in forever. x_x
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Great Rou, diver fairies are awesome. Maybe someday their plan will come to fruition, in time the may overcome such childish weaknesses (if they weren't fairies). Overall, this was really nice and cute story, and despite the amount of OCs you come up with, it all fits together and still feels very Touhou.
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>the flower
"But didn't she already have one?" :V
By the way, is the reason behind the waters being so clean staying a mystery for now, or was it explained by how "Jozu's the one looking after the lake"?
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Ahhh, the blindfold strategy. Gotta love fairy-logic. Quite clever in its own way, while at the same time utterly devoid of anything resembling wisdom or common sense.
It's the kind of thing that inspired me to make this post (http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?592186-Fairy-Cosplay-Online-playtest-whatsit&p=14586479#post14586479).
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Rou requested a Jacky/River so here you go.
(http://i.imgur.com/rwCv2.jpg)
If you're going to use a stereotype you need to go whole-hog.
Also:
(http://i.imgur.com/FS7h9.png)
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I thought sharks made a GASHUNK noise when they rammed things?
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Not when ramming fairies, apparently
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Nah, it's only when they knock down doors.
-
The weather showed no signs of improving. The clouds above were only getting darker, and the first crackles of thunder resounded in the distance. The rain battered Gensokyo without relent, and most youkai took shelter under trees or caves.
As a dolphin, Sango didn?t have that luxury. Instead she floated just beneath the surface of the lake, looking up at the miserable weather. These storms were uncommon, but when they did hit they were devastating. They never happened more than once a year, and Gensokyo was grateful for that.
The waves picked up, knocking Sango around a little. The winds were even strong enough to push the lakes about. Sango sighed, diving further down beneath the surface. She was thankful for the snorkel she?d received as a present from the local gods a few weeks earlier. The flower at its tip shifted up and down as she breathed, letting bubbles out but giving her more air than she was putting in. It was a convenient artifact that let her hide from the storm.
It?s pretty boring down here, though.
She?d been planning to take a trip to the Crystal Waters and go on a real expedition, but that would have called for an hour-long trek in this weather. She?d even talked Nitori into lending her a proper outfit for the dive - a real swimsuit, and those plastic foot things humans used to kick (http://i.imgur.com/my7GD.jpg). They didn?t make Sango any faster than she would have been as a dolphin, but she had to be in human form to use the snorkel.
The swimsuit and the fins were sitting in a pile at the bottom of the lake, still unworn, and Nitori was expecting them back first thing tomorrow morning. If Sango didn?t have a piece of plastic stuck in her mouth, she would have told the weather just what she thought about it. Another lash of thunder echoed through the water to return the gesture.
From down here, all she could see of the surface was a murky blur. Part of her wanted to just leap out of the lake and experience the storm for herself, embracing the fury of nature. Then she thought about the rain and the cold and the thunder and the wind, and sensibility won out.
The fish of the lake were circling around her, hiding from the storm as well. She reached out and stroked a passing salmon, its scaly side nuzzling against her hand. She smiled. Maybe she was bored, but at least she wasn?t bored and lonely.
Until the thunder roared again, and the fish darted off to the corners of the lake. Sango flinched slightly, but was mostly desensitised to the sound. It was going to be hard sleeping if the weather stayed like this.
On that note, what time was it? The clouds had made it impossible to see the moon, and Sango didn?t know any other way to keep the time. She approached the surface again, looking for a hole in the cloud cover to judge the sky by.
Instead, she saw something red jump out of the clouds. Something red that was getting larger very very quickly.
Wha-
She didn?t even have time to finish the thought before the object crashed into the water, sending the already churning waters splashing out of the lake. Sango had to pull backwards to avoid being crushed, turning around to look the moment she was in the clear.
A human figure was floating beside her, brushing off the sides of her blouse as if she?d simply fallen over. The shawl hanging over her shoulders waved about in the water, in perfect time with the ribbons protracting from her long-rimmed hat. She brushed a strand of violet-blue hair from in front of her eyes, straightening her hat before she turned towards Sango.
?Excuse me. You?re the dolphin youkai who lives in these waters, yes? I?d like a moment of your time.?
Sango immediately let loose with the questions. Who was this woman? What was she? How did she know who Sango was, and what exactly did she want?
Given that she was breathing through a snorkel, though, these questions all came out along the lines of ?blubblglubl?? The woman?s eyes widened, then closed as she nodded to herself.
?I suppose you?re entitled to your questions. I don?t have much time to spare, though.?
She broke for the surface, and Sango made a hasty pursuit. She noticed that the rocking waves of the lake had faded away the moment this woman had fallen in. Regardless, the rain was going at it as hard as ever, and Sango had to shield her face as she spat out the snorkel. She dismissed it, and it transformed into a flower as she placed it back in her hair.
?OK, so,? she started, barely able to hear herself above the storm overhead. ?First of all, who are you, and why didn?t you break anything with that landing??
The woman pulled down the tip of her hat. Rainwater drained off its edge, replacing the water she?d sent flying out with her entrance. ?I am Iku Nagae, an envoy of the Dragon Palace. I?d have to fall at twice that speed to be in danger of hurting myself, and that?s if I was landing on solid rock.?
Sango wouldn?t have believed that claim if she hadn?t just seen it play out in front of her. A messenger of the Dragon God was looking for her personally. This was beginning to get a little absurd.
?How did-?
?You were recommended,? Iku said before Sango could even finish the question. ?At the Dragon Palace we overhear much of what goes on in Gensokyo, especially among the deities. The Moriya gods spoke of a youkai with the power to purify water who lived in these lakes.?
Sango felt out of her depth. She was just an ordinary dolphin at the end of the day, but now the Dragon God - the Dragon God, the deity that all other gods in Gensokyo bowed down to - had reached out to her. She wondered if she?d fallen asleep at some point and this was all a dream.
Probably not. Dreams weren?t this loud. Or wet. Or uncomfortable.
?And what does the Dragon God want with me? I?m not gonna be served up for dinner, right??
Iku?s expression didn?t budge an inch. ?Miss Tororetsu, I?m not exaggerating when I say Gensokyo?s future may depend on you.?
Silence.
?...Seriously??
Iku nodded. She looked at Sango so sternly that the dolphin couldn?t believe she was lying. The sheer scale of her claim left Sango dazed for a moment. She gulped.
?What do you need??
?First of all,? Iku said, pulling close and lowering her voice to a whisper, ?I need you to promise that you?ll keep this incident to yourself. I?m going to have to break a few rules here, and if you start giving away divine secrets to every fish in the lake my superior won?t be very happy.?
Sango nodded. She figured she could keep a secret - as long as Satori didn?t return for another visit, anyway. That would be awkward.
?Alright. Now, I need to take you to the Dragon Palace so you can-?
?Wait a second,? Sango said, holding up a hand and interrupting Iku for a change. ?I?m not very good with geography, but isn?t the Dragon Palace at the bottom of an ocean??
Iku raised an eyebrow. ?Well, yes, but we?ll be using the-?
?One moment.?
Sango had vanished under the water before Iku could finish. She made no attempt to follow, which gave Sango plenty of time to recover her little stash. She shooed away any fish brave enough to take a look, and quickly changed into the gear she?d borrowed from Nitori. At least it wasn?t going to be totally wasted. She kept the belt - if they needed her for something, it probably involved her powers.
She surfaced again a few moments later, her shirt and skirt replaced by a much more aerodynamic swimsuit and fins.
Iku raised an eyebrow. ?I suspect it?s best not to ask.?
?It?d bore you.? Sango stuck her tongue out. ?So, how are we getting to the Dragon Palace??
The messenger?s face broke into a sly grin. Lightning lit up the sky for an instant as she drifted towards Sango, pulling her arms out.
?How else? We?re leaving the same way I got here.?
Her arms wrapped around Sango?s waist, gripping her with a strength her slender body shouldn?t have possessed. Sango had just enough time to figure out what was going on before she felt herself being jerked out of the water.
?P-Phweee!?
Sango squealed, kicking about as Iku lifted her further into the air. Heights had always been an issue for her, and as a dolphin it have never been one she?d seen a point in dealing with. She couldn?t fly, she never planned to climb the mountain she lived beneath, and she generally had no ambitions that took place far above sea level. As she was pulled up towards the pitch-black thunderclouds, she was understandably frightened.
?Don?t let go,? Iku said with a mischievous grin. ?It?ll be quite the drop if you do.?
You think?!
Sango tried to grab Iku in the same way Iku was grabbing her, but the envoy?s arms were locked around her elbows. Sango couldn?t do more than grab at her shirt for support. She looked straight up, well aware that looking down would just make her feel even worse. She started kicking with her legs, pretending that she was swimming through the air to calm herself down. It took her a while to notice that Iku?s legs were moving in time with hers, but from the glistening trail they left she knew that Iku wasn?t pretending.
?How do you do that?? Sango asked, poking at Iku?s leg with her knee. She?d point to it, but Iku?s grasp on her didn?t give her arms much room for movement.
?It?s the uniform,? Iku answered. ?It has the blessings of the Dragon God, and allows me to swim through air like it was water.?
Sango?s face flashed red for a second.
?C-Can I borrow-?
?No.?
?Dammit.?
The clouds were still a long way off, but Iku continued to ascend with her dolphin passenger. Sango couldn?t deny the feeling was exhilarating - the winds blowing through her hair, rain pummeling at her face as sheer adrenaline charged through her veins. She could hear her heart pounding like it was set to explode. She couldn?t even see the ground beneath her anymore, and the whole experience took her breath away.
Or maybe that was just a side effect of the height she was at.
?Ah-?
Sango was starting to feel a little light headed. She was aware that her breaths were getting shorter and shorter, drawing in less oxygen from the rapidly-thinning air. She tried to grab at the flower in her hair, but her hands were still locked at her sides. Iku continued upwards, unaffected by it. Maybe she didn?t need to breathe at all.
?Iku...? Sango wheezed. She could hardly find the air to speak. ?Need...flower...?
Iku tilted her head. ?I?m afraid you?re unlikely to find flowers at this altitude. Isn?t the one you?re wearing enough??
Sango began to kick about wildly, gasping and panting as the air continued to thin. She looked up towards the flower to try and get the point across. ?Can?t...breathe...?
The realisation hit Iku just in time. She loosened her grip so that Sango could squirm her arms out before clutching at her waist again. The dolphin quickly pulled the flower from her hair, blowing at it just hard enough to make it transform. She lodged one end of the snorkel into her mouth and savoured the sweet taste of genuine air.
?Huuu...haaa...huuu...?
The flower fluttered up and down as strength returned to Sango?s body. She wondered if Iku had been aware of it, or if the envoy of the Dragon Palace had forgotten about the troubles of mere youkai.
?I didn?t think snorkels did that,? Iku said, raising an eyebrow.
Sango pulled the snorkel away after she?d caught her breath. ?They don?t,? she said, before putting it back on. This time she bit down as hard as she could, unwilling to let anything pull her air away from her again.
Still, why are we headed this way? The bottom of the ocean should be...well, down.
The black stormclouds now hung right above Sango?s head. She could still see lightning jumping around inside the cloud, and the rumbling was ten times as loud here as it had been on the ground. She put her hands over her ears, relying on Iku to keep a strong grip on her.
?Get ready,? she heard Iku say. ?This is going to be rough.?
Sango felt Iku?s grip grow tighter, and she saw a brilliant glint shine in the envoy?s eyes. The pair charged into the thundercloud, and Sango clung to her guide for dear life. They had escaped the rain, but the lightning bounced around in all directions with deafening crackles. Iku picked up speed, grinning recklessly as if she was channeling the storm itself. She lowered herself to bring the pair within a few feet of a spark of lightning, and Sango reacted as any dolphin would in that situation.
?Mmmmh!? Are you nuts?! I don?t wanna be fried dolphin today!
Iku winked at her. ?I said it was going to be rough. I never said I planned to make it any easier.?
Sango considered letting go for a moment, only to remember that she was currently several thousand feet above the earth. She held onto Iku, deciding that Probably-Going-To-Die was still preferable to Definitely-Going-To-Die.
The lightning hung beneath them - or rather, they hung above the lightning as it danced across the cloud. Sango was relatively sure it should have struck them by now, but perhaps Iku had some sort of protective ward. She definitely hoped as much. She looked around the cloud, trying to find whatever it was Iku was searching for, when at last a shimmering light emerged in the distance. Hanging in the air in the centre of the stormcloud was a flickering doorway, made of the same lightning that was surrounding them right now. On the other side of the doorway Sango could see the briny depths of an ocean, and beyond that-
?That?s the Dragon Palace,? Iku said as she pulled in towards the door. ?You should be grateful - few youkai have ever seen it with their own eyes.?
The building was tall enough to outdo any building in Gensokyo, two jade dragons curling around its length. It was a pagoda with a dozen stories, black at the bottom but brightening to a sheer-white roof. Each of the roofs was covered in scale-like tiles, four jagged spikes sticking out of their corners. Lanterns hung from these, bringing light to what would have otherwise been a completely dark environment.
As Iku pulled her through the doorway, Sango came to a sudden realisation. She?d never ventured to any great depth before. The water pressure at the bottom of the ocean would be strong enough to turn her into a pancake. Given that Iku had forgotten about her need to breathe, Sango was worried for a moment that she?d be crushed the moment they passed into the doorway.
Instead, Iku clicked her fingers, and a sphere of flickering light surrounded the dolphin. Sango felt the water hit her, but it was with no more weight than the waters of her own lakes. She looked up at the envoy in bewilderment, and Iku simply smiled back.
?I?m not that bad, I?ll have you know. Now, right this way...?
Iku let go of Sango and took her by the hand as they approached the front door of the palace. Curiously, it was hanging open, but from the size of it the door would have been difficult to open and close on demand. The interior was as carefully designed as the exterior, with paintings of dragons on surrounding scrolls and impossibly well-kept wooden walls that glimmered with a magical sheen.
Dozens of other youkai were swimming about, in the same flamboyant uniform as Iku. They were all murmuring in hushed voices, but Sango didn?t need to hear them to know that they were uneasy. Something serious really was happening here.
But why do they need me?
She saw several of the passing youkai look towards her, with expressions ranging between confusion and relief. She felt her body temperature drop by a few degrees. No pressure or anything...
?Right, here?s the plan,? Iku said as she brought Sango further into the building. ?We?ve got some major impurities that need to be cleaned up on the bottom floor. It?s too strong for any of us to remove, which is why we sent for you. We don?t know how long you have, but if you?re too slow the consequences will be disastrous. Any questions??
Sango glared, pointing at the snorkel in her mouth again. ?Mmmmphhlbl.?
?Ah, right, I forgot. I?m sure there?s someone here who?ll take care of that.? Iku let go and pulled away, swimming towards a crowd of envoys and speaking in murmurs. Eventually one of their number nodded and looked towards Sango. She chanted for a brief moment, holding her hands out towards Sango, until with a pop a bubble came into existence around her head. Sango spat out the snorkel, checking that she could breathe in this newfound air supply. She was pleasantly surprised.
?Thanks,? she said, giving the magician a wave. The woman shook her head.
?No, Miss Tororetsu. Thank you.?
Before Sango could ask for any more explanation, Iku was pulling her along into the pagoda?s crooked corridors. The bubble bounced around in time with Sango, and like the snorkel it never seemed to run out of air. Sango had to wonder just how difficult this enchantment really was given that she?d seen it twice in a matter of weeks.
?So what am I cleaning up?? Sango asked, gripping one of the vials on her belt. ?Dirt? Curses? Demons??
Iku came to a stop in front of a large wooden door at the end of the corridor. She smiled again. ?You?ll figure it out.? She opened the door, and Sango got her first glimpse of her duty.
Hundreds of dishes and plates were floating about, each showing stains from use. Some were marked with flour, others with sugar, others still with butter. Some had burn marks that would need some heavy duty cleaning, and others were covered in a substance Sango couldn?t hope to recognise.
She felt a nudge on her back as she was pushed into the room. The door closed behind her with a final click.
?We still have some last-minute business to finish, so I?ll be on my way,? Iku said from the other side of the door. Sango could hear her drifting down the corridor already, her voice fading away. ?Remember - if you want Gensokyo to survive the storm, you?d best be quick...? From there she was too far away to be heard.
Sango charged the door, which unsurprisingly refused to open. The door was firmly locked, and her yelling didn?t earn her anyone?s attention. She heard one or two of the fellow messengers swimming by in a hurry once, and one of them sounded concerned, but his partner simply said Sango would ?calm down eventually?.
For about ten minutes, Sango sat in the corner of the room, glaring at the cutlery bouncing about. She?d been expecting a duty that could alter the fate of history, and in truth she?d just been hired as the world?s best dishwasher.
She thought of Iku, who?d hauled her into all of this. She remembered the stern look the envoy had given her when she had said Gensokyo?s fate depended on her. Could she have been lying? Sango tried to imagine it, but a look that stern could have only been honest.
?But still, how is dish-washing going to save the nation??
She didn?t know, and no-one planned on telling her any time soon. They?d locked her up in here and left her to do her job. A fork fluttered in front of her face, its tips grimy and coated in red.
She sighed.
?Either way, I can?t go home if I?m on bad terms with them...?
She rose to her feet, cricking her neck and flexing her shoulders. She pulled out one of her vials, filled with a liquid that could cleanse water of any impurity. It wasn?t large, and there was a lot of work to do with it, but they?d left her a washcloth as well. She poured a droplet onto it, and the cloth shone with a glorious light.
?Alright,? Sango said to herself, pulling over the first bowl. ?Time to show these youkai just why the gods were talking about me.?
-----
It didn?t take long for Sango to understand why she?d been sent for. This cutlery was in horrendous condition. She almost threw away two of the first dozen plates as lost causes, but with some thorough scrubbing she?d been able to wipe them clean. After about twenty plates the pure-water ran dry, and she was forced to reapply her magic to the cloth to keep up the pace.
The loneliness frustrated her more than anything. Being on her own for hours with nothing to do but clean dishes wasn?t her idea of a good time. She would rather have been braving the storm with her fishy friends than working cleanup for people she?d never met. When that thought came to her, she reminded herself that this was for the good of Gensokyo.
Yeah, I?m sure wiping the muck off of this plate will save thousands of lives.
It was a difficult idea to get into her head.
It took her an hour - or maybe two, she had no way of keeping time in here - but ultimately she had managed to clean up everything that she?d been left with. She?d even taken the time to arrange them in well-ordered piles, just so they?d be easy to put away later. It wasn?t like she had anything better to do.
When that was finished, she knocked at the door again.
?Uh, hey? I?m done in here. Can I come out now??
There was no answer. Sango frowned. They were still caught up in whatever it was they were preparing, most likely. She?d have to wait for someone to pass by.
It was only a few minutes before she heard footsteps stomping down the hallway.
?...Where?s breakfast? Hell, where?s the chef...??
A young girl?s voice traveled through the walls. She sounded too young to work here, but either way she probably knew how to open a door. Sango knocked to try and get her attention.
?Eh? Who?s there??
There was a click as the door creaked open again. Looking down, Sango found herself face-to-face with a youkai unlike any of the others she?d seen. Most obviously, she was dressed in a long green kimono, except rather than fabric it was made of scales. Her jade hair was tied by two jeweled ribbons, but it formed frill-like shapes behind her ears seemingly of its own will. A small fang hung above her lower lip, which was drooping like a weight had been tied to it. She looked about as ready to punch Sango as she was to say hello. Somebody had got up on the wrong side of the oyster this morning, Sango thought to herself.
?Uh, hey,? she said, waving half-heartedly. ?I know I?m not supposed to be here, but I?m kinda on a super-secret mission.? She was whispering for reasons she wasn?t really sure of.
The girl?s expression stayed as dark as before. ?A secret mission to clean the cutlery??
?They didn?t tell me that when I signed up.?
The girl sighed, crossing her arms. ?Whatever. I?ll find someone to take you home.? She looked around the corridor, muttering beneath her breath. ?...As soon as I can find anyone, that is.?
Sango?s eyes widened. ?You mean the envoys are gone??
?Yup. I just woke up a few minutes ago, and everyone?s missing.?
Sango pulled herself out into the corridor. Besides her and the girl who?d freed her, there wasn?t a soul to be seen. That was enough to worry her - they?d been flailing about in a panic only a few hours ago, and now they?d all vanished?
She remembered the stakes involved, and that just made her feel worse.
?Let?s look around,? she said with unexpected force, turning to her left and swimming down the corridor. ?They might just be having a meeting or something.?
The girl caught up with Sango easily. She didn?t even need to kick, Sango noticed - she just drifted along with the water perfectly naturally. She was looking off into the distance, just aware enough to turn when the corridor bent.
?I doubt it,? she said. ?They?re probably off to serve someone better than the lousy god running this place.?
?Eh? But I thought this was the palace of the most important god in Gensokyo.?
The girl put on a pained smile. ?You think Gensokyo?s the only country the gods care about? There are hundreds of Dragon Gods, all looking after different nations and different oceans. There?s a reason they only trusted this god with a couple of lakes.?
Sango bit her lip. ?And what would that reason be??
The girl looked down on herself, hanging her head in shame.
?It?s cause she?s...she?s...? She grit her teeth as the words forced her way out of her mouth. ?It?s cause she?s so damn short.?
Uh-oh.
Sango didn?t need to be a genius to make the connection. The girl was talking about herself.
Which meant that Sango was three feet away from the almighty Dragon God of Gensokyo.
To say she was nervous was something of an understatement.
?W-Well, come on,? Sango said, giving the deity a pat on the shoulder. ?It?s not like you?re that short. I mean, how old are you? Twelve? Ele-?
?Five thousand and twenty-seven, as of three hours ago.?
Sango couldn?t hide her groan. ?Oh.?
?I know, right?? Now that she?d started talking, the Dragon God didn?t look like she planned to stop. ?I mean all the other gods say I?ve got to wait until I?m at least ten thousand before I start worrying about adulthood. But ten thousand is aaaaages away. Why don?t I get to be a grown-up now??
Sango honestly couldn?t think of anything to say. She could practically see the clouds forming over the girl?s head, and knowing she was talking to the most powerful force in Gensokyo made her much less adventurous.
?Wait,? she said at last. ?If you got older three hours ago, doesn?t that mean today is your birthday??
The girl shrugged. ?Yeah, something like that. But I hate birthdays. Nothing like a reminder about how NOT-old I am.?
The pair searched throughout the first floor of the palace, but there was no sign of any of the Dragon God?s attendants. At several points they found letters from employees thanking her for the work but announcing their decision to take wing under a new deity. The young goddess responded by crushing each of these letters, the currents twirling around the scraps of paper to break them down to the atomic level.
?This is all Iku?s fault,? the goddess said to herself. She looked like she was fighting back tears. ?She was supposed to keep me informed if employee morale was getting low, but now everyone?s just walked out...?
Sango almost hugged her, but getting too close to an angry god could have led to all sorts of divine retribution. She settled for another pat on the back as they made their way back into the entrance hall.
?They didn?t even leave the lights on in here,? the dragon muttered. The lanterns that had been lighting the corridors and rooms came to an abrupt stop as they made it to the entrance. They drifted onwards for a few paces before the goddess?s eyes shone, and the lights in the room jumped back to life.
Dozens of voices called out at once.
?Happy Birthday, master Miryu!?
The Dragon God?s attendants stood around her in a semicircle, each of them holding out a plate. Each plate had a cake on it - some made with a master?s touch, others that barely qualified as edible, but every one stuffed with as many candles as they could fit. In the middle of the arc, Iku raised a finger into the air, and with hundreds of tiny crackles the candles burst into flame. Given that they were underwater, it was undoubtedly magical.
Miryu could only look on at what her followers were offering her. Sango, deciding her presence was unwanted, swam backwards into the corridors while the celebration played out.
?You guys...? Miryu hiccuped, fighting off the urge to cry in front of her subordinates. ?Why?d you do all this? Why would you wanna hang around with a little girl like me??
Iku smiled, stepping forward and taking the step Sango never did as she wrapped her arms around the Dragon God.
?Miryu...you may be young, but that doesn?t stop you from being our master. We?ll look after you until the day you become the greatest Dragon God of all.? She winked. ?And you?re doing a wonderful job looking after Gensokyo. Don?t you agree, miss Tororetsu??
Sango flinched as Iku called out for her, poking her head out from behind the wall.
?Yeah, I do,? she said, nervously at first but growing more relaxed with every word. ?Gensokyo?s a wonderful place to live. All sorts of colourful youkai and interesting locations...it?s great. So...thanks, I guess.?
Miryu shivered as the wave of emotions overcame her. She returned the gesture, hiding her face in Iku?s shoulder. Sango could hear her sniffling from here. Iku gave her a little squeeze.
?Now, be a good birthday girl and blow out the candles.?
It was a few seconds before Miryu had recovered herself enough to show her face again. She stepped backwards, turning towards Sango with a cocky wink. Sango saw the young god mouth ?Watch this!?
Then the tides started.
In all fairness, she did what she had set out to do. The currents definitely put out the candles, but they also sent Miryu?s attendants flying across the room. The cakes flew straight off their plates, slamming into either walls or any servant unlucky enough to be in their way. There were yelps and cries as Iku and her companions were knocked into each other, and no-one was lucky enough to escape unscathed. As the dust cleared, Sango decided that hanging back had definitely been the best idea.
Miryu frowned. ?OK, I think I overdid that a little. Can we try that again??
-----
?Sorry about that,? Iku murmured as Sango wiped away the last few stains of chocolate on her face. ?I wasn?t expecting the master to go overboard like that.?
?No worries,? Sango said. Iku was the last of her ?patients? - she?d taken it upon herself to repair the damage Miryu had done to her own palace. It was faster than the dishwashing, mainly because the cakes didn?t leave as stubborn a mark on the walls. She had magic to thank for that.
?So is your boss like that every year? She was pretty grumpy when she ran into me.?
?It?s been a problem for a few centuries now,? Iku answered, picking her hat off of the floor and putting it back on. She took care to straighten it. ?Master Miryu is rather...sensitive about her youth, and birthdays only make the problem worse. They make her angry, and when that happens Gensokyo feels the brunt of her wrath.?
?So that?s why you planned a surprise party for her??
?It?s something a little different from the norm. We thought it would cheer her up, but to get it all to work we had to make it look like we weren?t here. We were running behind, and if master Miryu found all of the leftover dishes it would give the game away, so...?
Sango nodded. As she?d hoped, it had all made sense in context, and she?d actually had done her part in saving Gensokyo. Not that she was allowed to tell anyone. She?d tried to negotiate that point with Iku, but the messenger was adamant that Sango hold to her promise of secrecy.
?I?d best be getting you back home,? Iku said, taking Sango by the hand. The dolphin would have wanted to hang around, but the anti-pressure ward Iku had cast earlier was beginning to flicker. Maybe it was best to leave while she still existed in three dimensions.
The trip back to Gensokyo held none of the mystery that her entry had offered, but the feeling of hurtling through the air wasn?t something she would get used to any time soon. She put on the snorkel before they departed this time, and given that her air-bubble burst the moment they were out of the water she was eternally grateful for her foresight. As the pair fell out of the stormcloud and dropped out of the sky, Sango saw the stormcloud fading away overhead. The sun was beginning to rear its head, the first rays of light striking the soaked earth.
Iku came to a stop just above Sango?s lake, dropping the dolphin in with a small plop. She removed her hat and put it to her chest, bowing her head.
?Allow me to thank you on the behalf of my fellow servants. You?ve done Gensokyo a great favour today.?
Sango shrugged. ?It?s not much, really. All I did was wash some dishes.?
Iku smirked. ?True. Then I can relax in the knowledge you have no reason to brag about it??
?Sure thing.? Sango gave Iku a salute. ?Now go make sure your boss enjoys her birthday.?
?With pleasure.?
Iku rose up into the sky, quickly fading into the red dot Sango had seen hours ago. She vanished into the remnants of the thundercloud, which dissipated entirely a few minutes later.
The storm had passed.
-----
?Bluggh.?
Nitori Kawashiro was just about conscious as she opened the shop for business. Last night?s storm had kept her awake, and it was only a strong shot of cucumber tea that kept her from collapsing into bed. She muttered to herself as she stretched her arms, reminding herself that a day wasted was a penny lost.
Only a few minutes after she?d opened the store, there was a ring of the bell as her first customer entered.
?Morning, Nitori!?
Nitori quickly found she?d been off the mark. Sango was not technically a customer. Customers bought things and gave her money for them. Sango just called in favours and borrowed things for a day or two. It was bad for business, but Nitori owed her for getting the shop started in the first place. The kappa were an honourable race first and foremost, though sometimes Nitori wished honour and profit didn?t have to oppose each other.
?Morning, Sango. I guess you?re here to return the stuff you borrowed yesterday??
She couldn?t imagine Sango had used the gear. Last night?s weather was far too violent for a dolphin to consider a trip to the Crystal Waters. Still, there was a definite spring in Sango?s step as she walked towards the counter, leaving the swimsuit and fins in a neat little pile in front of Nitori.
?Thanks again, Nitori. These were great.? Sango was grinning like an idiot, like she was laughing at the punchline of a joke no-one else was aware of. The kappa raised an eyebrow.
?Sango, just what were you up to last night??
The dolphin only gave her a wink.
?I?m afraid that?s classified information~?
-
This ... made me giggle. :3
-
herro agen
Commissioned another pic from the usual suspect. (http://shoxxe.deviantart.com/) Decided to colour this one and write a little story to go with it, so. As a warning I put this together in the space of half an hour, so don't expect brilliance. :V
-----
As Chen slowly came to her senses, she had an innate sense that something was wrong.
The first thing she determined was that this wasn't her bed. Harsh wooden planks pressed against her face as she struggled not to get splinters in her mouth. She tried to roll over, but something heavy was clinging to her back.
The next thing she realised was that these weren't her clothes. Her nightgown had vanished, and in its place someone had dressed her in a full skin-tight fabric in two shades of blue. A clunky plastic mask had been strapped in front of her eyes, and two floppy flippers were clipped to her feet. She kicked them about, the plastic dipping up and down in time with her movements.
This led to her third revelation - namely, the clanging of chains that she heard whenever she moved one foot.
"Nyaaah?!"
Chen rolled around, heaving at the weight on her back. A ball and chain had been clipped around her left ankle, held in place by a lock on the clamp. The key for this lock was sitting in the hand of the woman hanging over her.
"Good morning, Chen. Apologies for the rude awakening."
Chen's master, Ran Yakumo, was in an outfit very similar to Chen's. Her suit was black with grey highlights in comparison to Chen's cheery blues. A large cylinder was strapped to her back - Chen assumed that the weight she'd been hauling around was something similar.
The fox sat down on the edge of the wooden planks, her multiple tails bouncing around. Chen looked over to see what had caught her master's attention. Her vision was quickly filled with the largest body of water she had ever witnessed. Chen pulled back, but the metal ball was sturdy enough to keep her from getting too far.
Ran frowned. "See, Chen, that's exactly the sort of reaction I'm trying to help with. I understand that you don't like water, but you're not going to get anywhere unless you face up to the phobia. I'm tired of having to hold you down every time you need to take a bath. I had to bring you to the outside world and borrow some human technology for this, so you had better appreciate it."
Before Chen could come up with a word of complaint, Ran had already leaned down and grabbed her under the arms. She hauled the cat over to the edge of the dock, the metal ball dragging along behind her. Chen fought back with all her strength, but there was a reason she was only Ran's servant.
"Don't worry," Ran said, nuzzling at her familiar's cheek. "I'm not going to make you hold your breath or anything. That's what this is for."
Ran grabbed at the weight on Chen's back, bringing around a small plastic hose with a mouthpiece at the end. She brought it up to Chen's face, and the cat reluctantly bit down on it. There was a loud hissing as she took a breath from the tank, the faint aftertaste of processed air hanging on her tongue.
"You'll want to hold onto that," Ran said with a playful wink. She lifted up the metal ball, visibly struggling with the weight as she dangled it over the edge of the dock. "Are you ready?"
Chen shook her head violently. If she'd had half a say in the matter she'd have demanded to go home right now. Maybe Ran had given her this mouthpiece just to shut her up.
"I'll take that as a yes," Ran said, her eyes glinting mischievously. The ball fell into the water with a mighty splash, and Chen was pulled in soon afterward. The cat managed a muffled yelp before she hit the water, bubbles exploding in front of her eyes.
"Nyaaggllbll!"
Her first instinct was to break for the surface, but the metal ball put an end to that idea. Even then, swimming was something Chen had never learned to do, for obvious reasons. The weight continued to pull her further into the watery depths.
She felt weaker in the water. The entire reason she avoided it was that contact with water broke her connection to Ran - part of her contract with the fox involved Ran passing her energy whenever they were close. Water nullified that step of the contract, reducing Chen to less than half of her normal strength.
Thankfully, her master had been true to her word. In spite of everything else, the tank on her back was keeping her alive. She took long, nervous breaths, streams of bubbles passing by her face on the way towards the surface. The mask stopped the water from blinding her. If she wasn't caught up in trying to escape, she might have taken the time to appreciate the view.
After about half a minute, the ball hit the bottom of the shelf with a mighty clong. Chen was thirty, maybe forty feet beneath the surface by now, the light still reaching down to this depth. She could make out an advancing figure from above, growing larger and larger until eventually she recognised the form of her master. Ran was breathing from her own tank in the same was Chen was, her flippers sliding up and down with the grace of a fish. Chen couldn't help but feel jealous at the sight of it - if she could swim like that, she'd have been out of the water in no time.
"Gllbbbllbll."
Chen tried to voice her frustrations, getting nothing but a muffled gurgle for her efforts. The mouthpiece was keeping her breathing, but it made conversation difficult. Ran smirked, pulling out a card and pencil and handing them to her servant. After a few minutes of trying (and failing) to pick the lock with the pencil, Chen simply resorted to writing out her train of thought. Her message was short and simple.
PLEASE HELP :( (http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm114/Roukanken/phwee/chenfinal.png)
She'd even said please, Chen thought to herself. How could her master turn that down?
Ran let out a gurgled laugh behind her mouthpiece as she took the card back. She flipped it about, writing on the other side. Compared to Chen's hasty, simple message, Ran's was almost a monologue.
Two hours should be long enough for you to acclimate. Then taking a bath once in a while won't be so bad, right?
Chen gave her master the sternest glare she could. As soon as they got home, she was going to make a scratching post out of every table leg she could find.
-
Iced shakes his head sadly.
Silly silly Ran. Don't you know you can't train cats?
-
Good Story, though I wonder if chen will get the bends when she gets back to the surface
-
Characters and setting used with permission. All events portrayed within are fiction. Any likeness to any persons, living or otherwise, is completely coincidental.
/me cackles maniacally
Let the fun begin!
A Day In the Sun
The Crystal Waters sat tranquil in the pre-dawn morning, the sky barely lightening up because of the early hour. Many of the nocturnal animals had already settled in for the day, burrowing into their dens or staking out a handy cave or clearing in the nearby area.
Until, that is, a small ripple formed in the surface of the lake, followed momentarily by a shockwave of water spray being shoved aside as a blast of magic shot out of the lake towards the nearest tree.
The tree shuddered from the impact, wood creaking, and began to ponderously tilt towards the lake. The birds that were roosting in it took flight with an angry chittering and squawking, rousing the rest of the lake from its slumber.
The tree finally gave out, pulled slowly but surely towards the Waters. Once the roots came completely out of the ground, it tipped, canopy crashing into the surface with a mighty splash. The trunk stayed mostly on land, preventing the tree from sliding deeper into the lake. It had, after all, been picked for that exact reason - it was tall enough to catch on land while still stretching into the lake a ways.
The initial cause of the ripple began to move towards the tree's canopy, snatching up the leaves that had inevitably been shaken loose. After the water had been cleared of any floating detritus, the ripple made for the trunk of the tree.
There, a woman in an over-large shawl climbed up out of the water and reclined on the trunk. She daintily popped one of the leaves into her mouth and sucked on it, then shook her shawl lightly. Drops of water flicked off it, and she relaxed against a branch that had, at one point, been parallel to the ground.
"This is a wonderful place to sunbathe," she chirped to herself.
Jozu woke up quickly. One moment, she was asleep, the next, she was awake, still in motion. Even if she slept in her human form, she kept moving, instinctually unable to stop swimming lest she suffocate.
A smile spread across her face as she shed her animal form. Most of her neighbors had gotten used to a shark swimming around in a lake, but there was still no reason to make everyone but the pilot fish panic at the sight of her shadow.
She stretched, then froze when her hand bumped into something.
"Wha-?"
It took her a moment to identify the tree branch - after all, trees were something that one didn't often find underwater. The occasional branch would fall in, or be kicked in, or some human kid would try to toss one as far into the Waters as possible.
But never one this large.
"Weird." She grabbed the branch and began pushing for the surface. It provided a fair amount of drag, and had soaked up a lot of water, increasing its weight, nearly driving her to shift back into her shark form so she could use her tail instead.
"Nah," she grunted to herself. "Always confusing as hell when I breach like that. Dunno how Wonder Dolphin does it all the time." Jozu paused for a moment to consider the mental image of a shark leaping out of the water and doing a backflip before coming back down. "And I might break it in half in my teeth." The less-pleasant image of suddenly using a hundred toothpicks at once didn't appeal to her nearly as much as doing a backflip. "And I might not come back down..." Suddenly, the backflip achieved escape velocity, and a shark was spinning away through the clouds, twigs and toothpicks poking out of its mouth.
"That'd be terrible!"
Jozu nearly brained herself on the tree trunk, focused as she was on not flying away once she left the water, and not focusing on where she was going as much as she should've.
"Another branch? No, this one's bigger..." She swam alongside it, following it towards the Water's edge. Once she poked her head above the surface, she heaved the branch she'd been dragging out of the water and tossed it ashore as best she could.
"Hmm?" a voice chirped at her.
Jozu looked around. "Hmm?" she replied. "Hello? Are you a talking branch?"
The voice laughed, and Jozu finally spotted the woman reclining on the tree trunk. "No, sorry, I'm not a tree. Who are you?"
Another person! Momiji, the faeries, and Wonder Dolphin stopped by regularly enough, but if someone else wanted to visit the Crystal Waters, that'd be loads of fun, too. "I am Jozu Manou, Guardian of the Crystal Waters!" She kind of hoped the woman could hear the capital letters from the inflection she was putting on them. It'd be more impressive that way. "I am an aumakua. Who are you?"
The woman reclined against the tree trunk again, turning her face to the sky. "O'tuim," she sighed, smiling at the rising sunlight. "So what's an 'aumakua'?"
Jozu tilted her head, nearly exposing one set of gills to the open air. "It means I'm a Guardian," she said, again injecting another capital letter into it. "I take care of these waters. Did you see what knocked this branch over?"
The woman rolled over onto her side, facing Jozu properly now. "It's a tree, not a branch. See, branches are the smaller parts of the tree, but the tree is the whole thing altogether. And, I knocked it over."
Jozu felt annoyed. "Well, why'd you do that?" She didn't have any fancy tricks or magic to keep the Crystal Waters clean, like Super Dolphin did, so she had to work twice as hard to keep the waters clear. Not that she'd ever admit that it was a massive effort.
"I wanted someplace in the water I could sunbathe. Do you wanna join me?" O'tuim didn't seem to properly speak, rather mumbling sleepily or clipping her words in a lazy tone. A warm smile seemed plastered permanently to her face, and her eyelids seemed to be incredibly heavy - they hadn't opened fully the entire time Jozu was talking to her, and gave her a kind of droopy expression.
"You made a huge mess! What am I supposed to do with a tee in my Waters?" Jozu flailed her arms out of the water, gesturing angrily at the tree.
"Drink it, I assume? Unless you meant 'tree'," O'tuim chirped back at her.
The steam left Jozu's engine. She tilted her head to the other side now, confused. O'tuim reached out and patted Jozu on the head. The aumakua noticed that O'tuim's hands seemed to be slightly longer than normal, and she almost recoiled from the weirdness.
She glared up at the woman. "You better clean this up when you're done. Why couldn't you just do your sunbathing thingy on the shore if all you're doing is laying there?" The excitement of having another visitor to the Waters was wearing off quickly if it meant a tree was gonna get knocked over into it all the time.
"I don't like to be on land. Easier to get around in the water." O'tuim rolled completely over, laying on her stomach now. She folded her hands under her chin and gazed at Jozu sleepily. Pale hair poked out from under a green cap of some sort, and though some of it hung in front of O'tuim's face, she didn't seem to care.
Jozu didn't have much to say to that. Being a shark made it hard to get around on land, too, even in her human form. If it weren't for that dolphin, Faster Than Lightning, and her friend's breathing apparatus, she'd never be able to wander around the area surrounding the Crystal Waters.
O'tuim pushed another leaf into her mouth, bits of greenery sticking out from her lips, and she just continued to stare at Jozu.
It was unusual, having such flippant disregard pointed at her. Most people were cautious, or a little scared around her, on account of being a shark with Many Sharp Teeth. This O'tuim didn't seem fazed by it at all. Jozu tried smiling widely at her, showing off her Many Sharp Teeth.
O'tuim calmly sucked the leaf clear into her mouth and chewed mindlessly on it, still staring at Jozu with her droopy eyes.
Jozu's smile faded, and she sunk down to her eyes in the water. What a weird lady. She nodded at O'tuim and withdrew back underwater properly.
Maybe Sleepyhead would go away and take her tree with her in a while.
An hour later, Jozu had her breathing harness - the fancy gizmo that Super Tuna's friend put together so she could walk around on dry land without having to worry too much about things like suffocating. She put it on, which, while she was underwater, felt incredibly odd, and made for the surface once more.
O'tuim was still there, but had at this point taken her shawl off and folded it up under her head like a pillow. She was reclining on the tree wearing a two-piece swimsuit outfit, with scarcely any decoration on it, the bright white of the bikini standing out quite starkly against her tanned skin. She didn't seem to notice Jozu this time, instead keeping her face turned skyward, eyes closed and smiling at the sunlight. She had her hands clasped over her belly, with more leaves stuffed under them.
Jozu felt a pang of jealousy towards O'tuim, laying there for all the world to see.
Such tanned skin...
She shook her head and made for the shore. As long as the tree was stuck in the water, constantly losing leaves and smaller branches, cleaning the Waters was going to be an uphill battle. Maybe Derpy Dolphin could help with the tree - and hopefully maybe with O'tuim, too. Jozu felt they had to establish some kind of watery dominance. They were here first!
Sango stared up at Jozu, standing at the shoreline of her lake. The shark youkai had, along the trip from the Crystal Waters to the Youkai Mountain, gathered an extraordinary amount of twigs and leaves in her hair, and her bare feet were caked in dust.
"You didn't dry off before you started walking, did you?" she asked the shark.
"Couldn't stand hanging around any longer than I had to. I need to ask you a favor; can you come and help me with the Crystal Waters? A tree got knocked over into it. It's making the waters all... leafy."
Sango pushed ashore and rose out of the lake, checking to make sure her flower was still firmly twined into her hair. "I dunno how well my purification salts will work on a tree, but at the very least I can help you get rid of the leaves." Water flicked off of her dress, misting away easily, leaving Sango drier than Jozu, despite the shark's time spent out of the water just walking to the Youkai Mountain.
Jozu didn't seem to notice the magic trick. Sango chalked it up to not being an air-breather, and thus not thinking of utility magic like that. She'd have to see about teaching Jozu some time, so she wouldn't track mud into either lake.
"It's good that you're taking care of the breather tank. I don't think Nitori exactly remembers how she made it - or that she was the one who made it. She's totally fixated on this 'aeroplane' thing right now - at least she's not trying to get me to test out all her new fancy underwater gizmos. For a while."
Jozu nodded absently. To be honest, she hadn't had much use for the harness, so its not like it was getting too terribly worn out. However, when tree-snatching sunbathing youkai decided to wander past the Waters, it made handy for escaping their annoying obliviousness. Seriously, people should be more afraid of Many Sharp Teeth. If something had Many Sharp Teeth and came near you, you should at least apologize for anything you could think of.
Then, maybe she could figure out who stole her conch seashell collection.
The Crystal Waters finally came into sight, and Turbo Tuna let out a whistle. "That's a pretty big tree. I can see why you're having troubles."
"Mhmm," Jozu grunted back, then began trying to surreptitiously recreate the whistling trick.
From the tree, a small commotion was being raised. The three faeries who had insisted on banding together to plunder the Waters of all its bioluminescent plant life or whatever they said they were after were floating around the tree's canopy, where O'tuim had been lounging.
O'tuim herself had sat upright, her legs dangling into the water, and one of the faeries - the leader of their little group, Briar - was sitting on her shoulders. The faerie with a small flower sprouting from her head was hovering a small ways away from the tree trunk, while the third was slowly edging closer to Briar and O'tuim, rubbing her hands together subtly.
"This'll be great, guys! If we could ride on this turtle, we'll definitely make it past the Second Stratum, no problems! Having our own turtle to get around on would be perfect!" Briar crowed, pumping a fist into the air enthusiastically.
O'tuim tilted her head to the side. Jozu noticed that her cap had been pushed down over her eyes, and her pale hair was still sticking out in front of her face. Undoubtedly the faerie had pushed it down in her excitement.
As excited as Briar was, she didn't notice one of O'tuim's long hands come wandering its way up to her ponderously, until it had seized the faery completely in its lone grasp.
"Hgrk!" Briar grunted and tried to pry herself free, but since only one fist was upraised when she was grabbed, she wasn't making any good progress. O'tuim pulled her down off her shoulders and held the faerie in front of her.
"I don't mind you playing around me, but I am not your mare to ride around on."
Without bothering to push her cap up off her eyes, O'tuim simply heaved back with her arm, faery and all.
"Briar!" the flower-headed faery, Dandy, cried out.
O'tuim threw the faery out of the area. The backwash of the faeries' passing forced ripples across the surface of the water, and the tree's canopy lost several of its leaves in the gusting wind.
Jozu and Sango forcibly clamped their mouths shut as a dull thoom shook the area, and the other two Diver Faeries tumbled through the air, almost being dragged into Briar's contrail.
"Briar is trying to ride off into the sunrise again, River! We hafta go get her, what if she's smushed up against the Boundary?" Dandy righted herself with a quick flap of her wings, and took off after the first faery. The third faery, River, had tumbled onto the far shore and sat there looking dazed, unaware that Dandy had flown off.
"I think... I think she can keep her tree for a while. You think she's earned it?" Jozu asked sidelong at Tiny Whale.
"She's the one who knocked it over? We should at least ask her to clean it up when she's done... using it, I guess?" Sango shook her head. "I know those faeries leave glitter everywhere behind them, but I've never seen one leave a contrail in the air quite like that."
And for the rest of the day, O'tuim managed to sunbathe in peace, interrupted only once by Sango asking if she wanted all the leaves she'd gathered up out of the water after Briar's sonic boom had knocked them free.
-
This story comes with the Phwee Phwee Stamp of Approval. (Seriously the Sango nicknames pretty much cracked me up.)
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This is pretty awesome, really.
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So Sakana has been pestering me for ages to write about a platypus youkai, for reasons I can no longer remember. Either way, I got THE URGE today, and a few hours later this emerged from the ether.
Sakana, this is your fault. :V
-----
?Phweee...?
Sango was not the sort to do anything half-heartedly, even taking breaks. She bobbed along the surface of the lake, barely conscious enough to keep herself from bumping into anything. The sun hung over her head as she drifted, letting her mind wander. She?d done some good work today - a passing kappa had thrown a set of used batteries into the lake, and Sango had spent an hour cleaning up the mess they?d made. She felt like she deserved to turn her brain off for a while.
Birds fluttered over her head, and the fish of the lake circled her in curiosity. Sango closed her eyes, focusing on the cool water beneath her and the sounds of nature from all sides. She felt peaceful, relaxed, content. She wondered if she could stay in this trance until sunset.
Her reverie was shattered a few minutes later by a clunking sound in the distance.
?Ah??
Sango righted herself in the water, lying on her stomach as she swam towards the sound. She heard metal smacking against metal, and it was getting louder by the minute. She sighed as she brought herself to the edge of the lake and pulled herself up.
?If she?s back with another set of batteries, I swear...?
Sango cracked her neck. She wasn?t up for fighting, but she was definitely ready to give this kappa the lecture of her life. She looked towards the bushes, seeing them rustle as the source of the noise drew closer.
She was disappointed when the creature that stepped out of the bushes was something else entirely.
?Ah! Good afternoon, ma?am.?
A young girl emerged from the foliage, tipping her visor towards Sango in a greeting. She was almost engulfed in the thick brown fur coat she wore, looking ready to trip up over it at any moment. The clanking noise from earlier followed behind her.
Sango was lost for words. By the time she?d come up with something to say, the girl was already talking again.
?I understand my intrusion is somewhat sudden, but would you object if I were to use your lake for my research? I?ve heard you?re the local go-to girl, so to speak.?
She held a pen and clipboard - two handy inventions the kappa had brought over from beyond the border. Sango peered down onto the paper; its contents mainly consisted of doodles and scribbles that had no scientific value.
?Research?? Sango raised an eyebrow. When she heard the kappa use that word, it typically ended in something unpleasant. ?You?re going to have to clarify.?
The youkai gasped. Her short brown hair curled around the visor, like it was deliberately trying to get in her way. Luckily, the swimming goggles she wore kept the strands from poking at her emerald eyes as she ruffled through her notes. Sango watched her flip through half a dozen pages before finding the only sheet with actual words on it.
?Certainly, ma?am.? She squinted at the miniscule text. She adjusted her goggles as if they were glasses. ?I?ve been working on a machine that will produce efficient electrical power through the turbulence present in an aqueous solution.?
Sango blinked. That sentence had too many long words in it. The would-be scientist stuck up her nose.
?In layman?s terms, it?s an engine that runs on water currents. Should serve to produce energy without the pollution present in other methods, if my calculations are correct.?
That was a language Sango could speak. She was grateful for the translation, but the scientist?s snark was not winning her over. Still, an ecologically friendly power source would probably save her a lot of work in the long run. She sighed.
?Well, you can give it a try, Miss...uh...?
The little girl puffed her chest out, brushing at her hair with one hand. ?Professor Marin Gong, at your service.? She stepped out of the brush and towards the lake without bothering to shake Sango?s hand. Now the dolphin could make out the floppy tail trailing out from under Marin?s coat, and the bag that was tied to it.
Sango stared at it for a moment, walking alongside the girl until she took a seat at the lakeside. Her curiosity got the better of her.
?So, uh, Marin-?
?Professor.?
Sango frowned. ?Professor Marin. What exactly are you??
Marin looked up at the dolphin, eyes popping open. Instants later she was shaking her head and tutting. She reached up and patted Sango on the head - no mean feat considering she was a head shorter than the dolphin.
?Poor, poor you,? she said with a sigh. ?I can?t believe you?re so old, and this is your first time meeting a platypus.?
That clarified nothing. ?Platypus?? Sango said, pushing Marin?s hand away. The platypus looked hurt, but pulled the hand back to shuffle at her coat.
?Indeed,? she said, her tail lifting off the ground. She reached backwards and undid the knot that kept her bag of equipment tied to it. ?I?d like to think we?re something of a novelty with regards to evolution. The best parts of a duck, a beaver and an otter, all rolled into one!?
She opened up the bag, pulling out a fan-shaped device. The exterior was transparent, letting Sango see the gears and shafts inside. Attached to the fan by a wire was a voltage reader, which Marin promptly switched on.
?And as you?ll soon see, we?re rather ingenious as well.? She winked at Sango, dipping the fan under the water. ?All those kappa think they?re so intelligent, but they?ve yet to witness the wonders of the platypus!?
She looked down eagerly at her voltmeter. Sango hung over her shoulder - partially out of curiosity, and partially because she didn?t trust this girl on her own.
?Uhhh...? Sango bit her lip as she looked at the readings. ?Is the number meant to be that low??
Marin growled. ?No. No, it?s not.? She put her face closer to the meter, as if that would somehow make the voltage jump. It didn?t.
?Hm...maybe I broke the circuit??
She pulled her head back, grabbing at her visor. She brought the duckbill-shaped plastic down over her nose, blowing into it with a quiet hum. Sango tried her best not to giggle.
?Ummm...? She couldn?t help but smile as she watched the now duck-billed scientist glare into the water at the fan. ?What?re you doing, exactly??
Marin looked back at her, looking almost impossibly serious given what she was wearing. ?I?b scanneeng fer illictri-? The visor blocked off her nose, muffling her words. With another grunt, she pulled it back up over her eyes again. ?I?m scanning for electric fields to see if the machine?s working like it?s supposed to.?
?You don?t seem happy with the result.?
Marin growled again. ?That?s because it?s working. The machine is definitely functioning, but...? She lifted up the voltmeter, still showing no power coming from the fan. ?For some reason, the water?s not pushing it along.?
Sango put a finger to her chin. She wasn?t a scientist, but she could make a few educated guesses.
?Maybe you need to put it deeper in the water? If it?s running off of currents, you might get stronger ones on the lakebed.?
The platypus let her guard down for a moment. She looked up at Sango in wonder, like the dolphin had just offered her the secrets of the universe. Then she was back to the same hard-headed grin as before.
?Ah, yes. Of course. The old ?stronger current? trick. I was about to try that, actually.?
She pulled the fan out of the water for a moment, stepping away from it as she made to change. She pulled off her fur coat, revealing shorts and a tank-top underneath. Her tail flopped out from the top of her shorts, nearly as long as she was tall.
?Haaah, it feels good to take that off,? Marin said to herself as she stretched. ?It?s always so hot and stuffy inside that thing.?
?Then why do you wear it?? Sango asked.
Marin gave her another condescending glare. ?It?s a fur coat. What else am I going to do with it??
After checking her goggles were airtight, Marin pulled the visor over her face again. Maybe it was to keep water from getting into her nose. Whatever the reason, Sango had to look away to keep herself from laughing uncontrollably as the platypus picked up the fan again.
Better keep an eye on her, though.
When Marin dipped into the water, Sango followed soon afterward. The platypus was a faster swimmer than she?d expected - though most of the work came from her hands, while her legs and tail seemed to be there just for steering. All the while she was looking intently at the voltmeter, pulling the fan deeper and deeper alongside her.
From this distance Sango couldn?t see the reading, but from Marin?s livid expression it couldn?t be very good. The pair continued to descend for twenty, thirty seconds, Sango keeping a safe distance from the girl at all times.
This turned out to be a good move when Marin stopped in place.
?Blu??
Marin put a hand over her mouth as a bubble popped out. As Sango drew closer, she saw the girl begin to puff up her cheeks.
?Blubbllbuubl!!?
Seconds later Marin was bursting for the surface, leaving a trail of bubbles in her wake.
Huh?
Sango watched the platypus break the surface, still dumbfounded. How long had they been under? Thirty, forty seconds at most? Sango could keep going for another fifteen minutes if she wanted to.
When Sango surfaced at last, Marin was lying on the side of the lake, using her fur coat as a towel. She was still gasping and panting as the dolphin took a seat beside her.
?You?re, uh...? Sango looked for a polite way to say what she was thinking, but nothing came to mind. ?You?re not very good at this whole underwater thing, are you??
Marin didn?t answer for a while. It wasn?t a hard conclusion to make - she had to wear goggles to cover her eyes, and that hilarious visor to protect her nose. She was a decent swimmer, but her breathhold time was abysmal at best.
?I?ve been trying to work on it!? Marin said at last, sulking as she wrapped herself up in the coat. ?I came up with this tank thingy you could put air in, but the only gas I could get to work was an anesthetic. I nearly drowned when I tested it...?
A cold wind hung in the air, and Marin buried herself in the fur to protect herself. Sango heard the platypus mumble to herself, her tail slapping repeatedly against the ground.
As the dolphin looked at the fan, her face flushed.
?Uh, Marin...?
Marin pulled herself out of the coat. ?I said it?s PROFESSOR Marin! How many times do I have to tell-?
She stopped mid-sentence as she saw Sango point towards the fan. Marin turned around to see it twirling about in the wind, the voltmeter finally giving a real reading.
So in trying to make water power, she made wind power...? Sango was impressed for all the wrong reasons. She moved forward to give the girl a pat on the back.
Marin pushed her away.
?Aaargh, it happened AGAIN!?
She rose to her feet, glowering at the machine as she fumbled it back into the bag. Sango tilted her head.
?What?s up? Your machine worked, didn?t it??
Marin looked on the verge of a tantrum as she turned back to Sango. ?Worked? Worked?! It?s doing exactly what it?s NOT supposed to do, you dolt! How can you call that a success?!?
Sango was taken aback by the sudden aggressiveness. Marin pulled her coat back on, throwing her clipboard into a nearby bush.
?I swear, this happens with EVERYTHING I invent. I was working on an air conditioner and came up with a hairdryer, for crying out loud! How can this keep happening to me?!?
Before Sango could get a word in, the platypus had already started to walk away. Steam flared from her ears as she dragged her coat and tail along the ground.
?Back to the drawing board...again. Agh, why won?t anything work like it?s supposed to...??
The clunking and clattering of her contraptions faded as she headed off into the distance, leaving a speechless dolphin to figure out what she?d just witnessed. Sango stared in Marin?s direction for almost a minute before falling backwards into the water.
Once again, she let herself bob along the surface, letting her brain switch off as she floated around. This time, though, it was out of necessity rather than relaxation. If she thought about Marin for too long, it?d probably do some damage to her mental faculties.
Gensokyo is a strange, strange place...
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Sakana, this is your fault. :V
I regret nothing, as usual.
I am very amazed and amused how you managed to translate a platypuses main features into an outfit! And I like Marin's character too, interesting way to complement the kappa through another technologically interested race.
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Damn shit, cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!
Had to let that out, guess you could eventually write an entire series on Chen's bathing...
And the pic is nice too, nyaa I want to write about chen too.
-
?Alright, ladies. You?re on in ten minutes.?
A kappa poked her head into the dressing room, the door creaking as she pulled it open. Mystia nodded, never looking up from her guitar as she gave it one last tuning.
?This looks pretty nice, actually,? Mystia said. The guitar was a special model the kappa had designed for the event, with a small amplifier built into the sound hole. The sides curved in with a smooth gradient, more for aesthetics than anything. ?Though does it sound kinda muffled to you, or is that just me??
Kyouko was going through some last-minute vocal practice, shifting from one note to the next in a fluid transition. Mystia had been surprised by the yamabiko?s voice control - most people could only hold a note or yell it, but Kyouko was one of the rare few who could do both at once. Mystia usually missed by an octave or two when she started shouting, but that was why she wasn?t on vocals.
That and the whole night-blindness thing.
?The kappa said it?ll work properly out on stage, right? They?re the brainiacs.? Kyouko stood up with a stretch, almost hitting her head against the ceiling. Considering she was no more than five feet tall, that said a lot about the size of the room. ?It says a lot that they went so far to get us out here, doesn?t it??
?Uh.? Mystia struggled for an answer. ?It?s nice and all, and there?s no way the shrine maiden will break up the performance like last time. But...?
Kyouko tilted her head. ?But??
Mystia knocked at the wall of their ?dressing room?. It clanged like the inside of a tin can. She pulled her wings out, nearly hitting Kyouko in the opposite corner.
?I?m not exactly feeling like royalty.?
Kyouko shrugged. ?I?m just looking forward to getting out there. I heard we had a big kappa fanbase, but I didn?t realise it was that big.?
She pointed out the porthole. Through the window Mystia could make out a crowd of hundreds, murmuring to each other passing around memorabilia of all shapes and sizes.
?Is he...? Mystia squinted at one fan in particular. ?Does that shirt have my face on it??
Kyouko gave her a pat on the back. ?Welcome to the big time, Misty. These people are all here to listen to the roars of our souls.?
Ugh. Mystia winced. That was one of Kyouko?s favourite phrases when it came to the band, and Mystia couldn?t imagine anything cornier. She?d have complained, but the yamabiko?s enthusiasm was so strong that Mystia couldn?t bring herself to put the girl down. She diverted her frustrations elsewhere.
?OK, I get that. But do we have to go out dressed like this??
Mystia was fine with most of the outfit. She liked the bikini top, and the skirt was a nice little touch. But the shoes - could she even call them that? - were some of the most impractical things she?d ever worn. They were plastic, flipper-like contraptions, and as she tried to walk in them she couldn?t manage anything faster than a waddle.
?It?s business.? Kyouko raised a leg, waving one of her own flippers about. ?The guys who paid for the event are looking to sell more of these fin-thingies. Having us wear them on stage will be a big boost to their sales.?
?Oh, great.? Mystia rolled her eyes. ?I?m going to inspire duck-feet as the latest fashion craze.?
Kyouko giggled, pulling up one of the shoulder straps of her jet-black one-piece. Frills ran along her waist like a ballerina?s tutu, and two spiked armlets were clipped to her wrists.
?Don?t worry about it,? she said with a smile. ?Just go out there and play.?
Mystia nodded. She gave the guitar another squeeze of affection. It wasn?t her guitar, but it was close enough. Kyouko played to vent her frustrations; Mystia performed for performance?s sake.
?Yeah, you?re right. But I?m going back to normal shoes next time, no matter what the higher-ups want.?
With their final checks done, the pair headed down the corridors towards the airlock. Mystia would have flown, but there wasn?t enough room for her to pull her wings out. She had to settle for walking, one clumsy footstep at a time. Kyouko made quacking noises as she followed behind, laughing to herself.
Mystia fought back the urge to punch her vocalist in the face.
?Ah, Ms. Kasodani! Ms. Lorelei!?
A voice popped out of a side corridor. A young kappa leaped out soon afterwards, sprinting to catch up with the two musicians. Mystia turned to face him as he caught his breath.
?Yeah, that?s us,? Kyouko said with a salute. ?What?s up??
The kappa was too busy panting to answer, simply opening the wooden box he had been carrying. Two inhaler-like contraptions sat inside, labeled K and M. It wasn?t hard to tell who was meant to take which, and Mystia picked up hers without being told to. She eyed it from all angles, brow furrowed.
?You?re sure this?ll work, right? I mean, if it doesn?t, I really won?t have time to regret it.?
This was the other part of the performance Mystia had been worried about. It was one thing performing in front of a crowd while dressed like a duck.
Doing all that while underwater was a whole other issue.
?The audience are all using these, and there haven?t been any problems,? the kappa said when he?d finally recovered. ?And we?ll have some safety divers nearby in case anything goes wrong.?
Mystia?s concerns still lingered in spite of the kappa?s promise. She looked to her side for Kyouko?s opinion, only to see the yamabiko already taking a puff from her inhaler. She beamed a grin at Mystia as she put it back in the box.
?Don?t worry, Misty. I can lend you some air if you get in trouble.?
She winked. Mystia felt her face catch on fire. She turned away from both Kyouko and the kappa, taking the deepest breath she could from the inhaler to cool herself down. Her chest tingled as she turned around and put it back in the box alongside Kyouko?s.
?Thanks,? the kappa said. He looked up at Mystia, his eyes glistening slightly. ?I?m, uh, a big fan, and I?ll be in the front row. So, uh, if the air doesn?t work out, I could lend you-?
?Don?t you have somewhere to be?? Mystia said, glaring at him. The kappa got the point, hanging his head as he slipped away down the corridor.
Kyouko frowned. ?Misty, that wasn?t very polite.?
Mystia continued to stare in the kappa?s direction until he was out of sight. ?Last I checked, politeness wasn?t a virtue of punk rock. Besides, he?s going to sell those to someone for a killing.? She could imagine the advert now - Get A Second-Hand Kiss From Mystia Lorelei, or something like that. She trembled as she made her way to the airlock.
About halfway down the corridor, Mystia became aware that she hadn?t needed a breath since she?d used the inhaler. It was an awkward feeling to start with, but by the time she entered the airlock it was as natural as, well, breathing. Kyouko skipped along behind her, humming to herself without pause. The yamabiko could hold a note for a minute and a half now if she wanted.
Hopefully she didn?t realise that, or they?d never make it past the first song.
The metallic door clanged shut behind them. The room flooded over the space of a few seconds, but neither girl paid it much mind. Mystia was slightly anxious when the water slipped over her nose, but the lack of imminent drowning was enough to keep her from panicking.
She gave the guitar another shot, and this time the riffs echoed through the water with perfect clarity. Kyouko ran through the scales besides her, her voice traveling through the water like it was air. It was like they were performing on dry land, except a little colder and a lot damper.
Outside, the crowd began to chant in unison. The sound was like a switch that turned on the performer inside of Kyouko. Mystia saw her eyes shine with enthusiasm as she grabbed at the pouch on her waist. Mystia copied the gesture, reaching at her own waist and pulling out a pair of yellow shades. If these drifted off into the water mid-performance, she?d be very unhappy.
?You ready?? Kyouko asked as she put her shades on. She smiled like an animal on the prowl, lapping up every ounce of the atmosphere.
Mystia couldn?t quite match her zeal, but she could get close enough. She donned the glasses and grabbed at her guitar, ready to let the music flow.
?I was born ready.?
As if on cue, the airlock pulled open. A wave of raving applause washed over the night sparrow.
?Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for CHOUJUU GIGAKU!?
An announcer?s voice carried through the water as the two youkai took their places. In the short swim onto the stage, Mystia learned to appreciate just how agile these flippers made her. Her wings were already weighing her down.
Kyouko came to a stop in front of the mic stand, Mystia standing to her side. The yamabiko grabbed at the microphone, and for an instant she wore the smile of a child having three birthdays at once.
Then the beast was unleashed.
?ARE YOU READY TO ROCK THE FUCK OUT?!?
A roar of consensus came from the audience. Kyouko was manic as she screamed into the mic, so loud that she was almost deafening.
?WE ARE CHOUJUU GIGAKU!? she cried. ?AND WE ARE HERE TO ROCK YOUR GODDAMN FACE OFF!?
She raised a hand upwards as a cue to her partner. ?ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR!?
Mystia looked down at the guitar. The world around her faded away, leaving her alone with her instrument. Her fingers began to dance across the strings, chords shooting out one after another. She paid no mind to the crowd, to the water, or even to her outfit. Right now, the music was all that mattered.
Her sound was aggressive and violent, but with a hint of grace. Kyouko?s voice was her metronome, keeping her in time as she moved from one verse to the next. The music flowed in her blood, as much a part of her as her own flesh. Every note she hit was like a current through her body, flooding her with excitement and adrenaline.
Only at the end, after a solo that made the water itself tremble, did Mystia come back to the world of the living. Kyouko was hanging upside-down in the water, yelling a final ?YAHOOOOOOO!? into the mic. The crowd screamed in unison, their applause almost matching the sheer volume of Kyouko?s voice. For Kyouko, that was saying a lot.
?Huuu.?
Mystia sighed as the moment passed. It had been worth it after all: the dumb costume, the cramped sub, even the attendant who?d tried to hit on her. It had all been a hassle, but for the chance to play in front of a loving audience she?d be willing to do just about anything.
Kyouko held out a fist, still hanging upside-down in the water. ?Your soul is really loud today, Misty,? she said as she pulled the mic away from her face.
Part of Mystia?s brain still wanted to throw up at that choice of words. It was still corny as hell, but in the euphoria of the performance she couldn?t bring herself to care. She bumped her own fist against Kyouko?s.
?Betcha I can be louder than you on the next song.?
The yamabiko?s eyes blazed. ?You?re on.? She took her place in front of the mic again, cracking her neck as they prepared to work their way through the set list.
Mystia gripped her guitar like a weapon. The crowd tensed in anticipation. In a few seconds, the water would explode with sound.
And she was going to love every second of it.
-
YAHOOOOOOOOOOOO!
*Ahem* Very nice Rou. Very nice indeed.
>.>
<.<
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>Rou writing something canonical with no water
WHAT IS THIS
-----
Sweeping a courtyard seemed a little menial for a god.
Sanae Kochiya brushed at the leaves with care, bringing them together into an orderly pile in the corner. There weren?t many trees up on the mountain?s peak, but the few that were present grew in enchanted soil. Suwako?s blessing had caused the plants here to cycle through the seasons three times faster than normal, which meant three times as many leaves to pick up afterward. It was a neat trick to get the attention of passing youkai, but it was a nightmare to clean up after.
She considered cheating for a while. It wouldn?t take much to summon a breeze that would pick up the leaves for her. It?d cut the time she spent sweeping in half, if not further. Then she could spent the rest of the day gathering faith and spreading the word.
No, that?s not right.
She shook her head. Kanako had asked her in particular to clean this courtyard. There were a couple of tengu attendants who dealt with the chores around the shrine, but Kanako had explicitly asked for Sanae?s help. It was a lesson in humility, something to keep her from getting too proud. It would defeat the purpose if she took the easy way out.
What wisdom, Lady Kanako, Sanae thought as she smiled to herself. She started sweeping a little bit harder.
It had been a while since Sanae had tended to the grounds. As only a partial deity she had to devote more time to maintaining her faith than her gods did. In the past she would frequently made the journey to the human village to earn their praise with simple miracles and minor blessings.
But the trip had lost meaning for her. Ever since Byakuren and her Buddhists had arrived on the scene, they had tended to most of the little troubles the human village had. Sanae could no longer conjure up a farmer?s lost rake; whenever she tried, she found that a mouse had beaten her to the punch. Her visits were rare now.
She?d found other ways to maintain her power since then. They were less peaceful methods, but they worked well enough. The only fight she?d struggled with until now was against the Hakurei maiden, but with a few years of extra practice Sanae fancied her chances. Then she?d take Reimu?s place, and take in all the faith she let go to waste-
Sanae?
A voice jumped into Sanae?s head, pulling her from her trance. It spoke only a single word, but it carried the quiet dignity only a god could possess.
Sanae liked to call it her divine voicemail.
What?s up, Lady Suwako?
Sanae directed her thoughts towards her deity. Most mortals could only speak with the gods through devout prayer, but gods could communicate with each other much more easily.
?What?s up?? Really? Suwako replied, the whole quiet dignity act falling away immediately. A young god shouldn?t talk like that, y?know.
Sanae pictured the goddess she was talking to. She tried to imagine a stern look on Suwako?s face, but the googly-eyed hat she always wore made it impossible. She giggled uncontrollably for a few seconds before sending off a response.
Times have changed, Lady Suwako. Everyone talks like this nowadays.
The olden dialects of Suwako?s time had fallen away of late. Other than a few stragglers - like the monk who?d risen from the dead all of a few months ago - speech had become a lot more relaxed, almost in line with what Sanae was used to beyond the border. In fact, even Suwako was letting herself slip a little bit - ?y?know? wasn?t something she would have said in the feudal era-
I?m gonna stop that thought process now before it goes too far, the goddess said. She sighed, and Sanae almost felt the breath slip out of her ears. I was joking, okay?
Oh. Sanae hung her head even though Suwako wasn?t there to see it. Even back at home her classmates had considered her straightforward. The term she would have preferred was something like ?focused? or ?highly trusting?, but no-one ever seemed to use those words. A-Anyway, what is it?
Kanako wants to talk to you when you?re done with those leaves. Sanae heard the goddess shuffle her hat on the other side of the shrine. Breeze ?em together or something. This is kinda important.
Sanae gasped. Most girls her age would have considered a talk from their elders a bad thing, but Sanae was always eager to learn from her superiors. No-one became a great god without a great mentor, after all, and the two gods of the shrine had been endless supplies of wisdom.
Are you sure that?s okay, though? Sanae looked down at the brittle-haired broom in her hands. Lady Kanako wants me to train myself by-
A hearty laugh broke into the conversation, too deep and rugged to belong to Suwako. Sanae had to grab her ears as the sound echoed through her brain.
Sanae, what are you talking about? Kanako said. I just wanted you to do it because the tengu are busy setting up tonight?s service. Hurry up, already!
The voice faded away as quickly as it came. A vague humming in her skull told Sanae that Suwako was still listening.
...Uh, well, what she said, the goddess blurted. A moment later, the humming stopped entirely, and Sanae was alone in her head again. She looked down at the broom with a new feeling of reluctance.
Flinging it into the corner of the courtyard, she turned to the nearest set of leaves and pulled it upwards with a motion of her hand.
Maybe I?m trying too hard...
-----
The Moriya Shrine was much larger than its Hakurei counterpart, mainly thanks to Kanako?s handiwork. She had constructed a temple for the Buddhists in a single evening, so tending to her own shrine was almost a non-issue. Sanae stepped across the wooden floor without so much as a creak, every plank polished until it shone.
The shrine itself was not quite as ordered. Kanako had done her best with it, filling it with statues and paintings of her trademark animal, the snake. For the first week or so it had been an impressive sight, but then a mysterious vandal had drawn crude frog-shaped scribbles on some of the scrolls. The culprit was obvious, but Suwako had covered her tracks just enough that she?d never been caught in the act. Now only the odd unblemished statue remained, with the rest consigned into the back rooms out of shame. On the plus side, there was a lot more room for Sanae to walk now.
As she stepped into the main prayer room of the shrine, Sanae found her two gods already waiting for her. Kanako?s mature, imposing form was a start contrast to the almost-infantile Suwako. The earth goddess twirled her hat in one hand, beckoning Sanae in with the other.
?Took you long enough,? she said as she put the hat back on. Its eyes jiggled around for a moment before focusing on Sanae. ?You weren?t busy dealing with that Shizuha girl, were you??
Sanae winced. ?That was three months ago, wasn?t it? I thought we promised to drop that.?
?We would have if you hadn?t given us reason to remember,? Kanako said. She stepped forward, the wooden floor rippling beneath her feet like water.
?Eh?? The shrine maiden blinked. ?What did I do? I?ve just been working on my duties at the human village and-?
?Youkai hunting?? Lady Kanako said.
?Yes, that.? Sanae nodded without a hint of shame. ?You said it was a good way to build up my faith.?
Kanako sighed, grabbing at her temples and grumbling. Suwako reached up and poked at her shoulder.
?Don?t get so stressed, Kanako. You?ll get wrinkles.?
The sky goddess retaliated by snatching Suwako?s hat and holding it above her head.
?Hey, no fair!? Suwako leaped as high as she could to grab it back, but Kanako always pulled it just out of reach. Even as Kanako looked back to Sanae she kept the hat out of its owner?s hands.
?Sanae, there?s nothing wrong with a little youkai hunting.? Without even looking, Kanako swapped the hat from one hand to the other to keep it away from the pint-sized goddess. ?Beating youkai in a spellcard duel is a great way to earn their respect, and their faith as a result. But you?re a little too...liberal about it.?
Sanae tilted her head. ?Liberal??
?She means you?ve gotta stop beating up everyone you meet,? Suwako said, jumping onto Kanako?s back and grabbing at the hat. She snatched it away and put it back on her head, puffing her chest out with pride as she sat on Kanako?s shoulders.
?...I?d have worded it a little differently, but Suwako is basically right.? Kanako poked Suwako in the chest, and the little goddess fell away with ease. ?There are a few unspoken rules you aren?t really following. For example, it?s bad policy to challenge one of our followers to a duel.?
?Eh?? Sanae scratched at her head. ?But if I beat them in a fight, won?t that just make our shrine look even better??
?That?s not the point.? Kanako bit her lip, struggling to hold back an outburst. ?Youkai are proud folk, and fighting followers is bad for business. If you beat someone down like that, they?re going to be too embarrassed to show their face around you.?
Suwako poked her head out from between Kanako?s legs. ?Most people, anyway. Some of them hang around and mooch off of you for free faith.? She pulled away before Kanako could trap her head between her thighs.
?Ah, right.? Sanae hung her head again. She?d never considered the consequences of a fight beyond gaining herself faith. ?Sorry. It?s just...?
Kanako?s eyes widened. ?What is it?? Her words were coated with concern.
Sanae was slow to answer. She?d done what she could to keep her problems to herself, but now she was backed into a corner. She played with the snake charm in her hair to calm her nerves.
?There doesn?t seem to be a place for me in the human village anymore. Byakuren and her followers are tending to their needs, so the only way I can gather any faith is by hunting youkai.? She shrugged her shoulders. ?Besides, if they want a shrine maiden, they just go to Reimu. What am I supposed to do??
She tried her best not to sound defeated, but her true feelings shone through in her voice. Was she just a bad god? Would Kanako have done better in her position? The thoughts bounced around in her head until a hand fell on her shoulder.
?Sanae, I want to ask you something.? Kanako had a mother?s smile, and her hand was from with surplus faith. ?When you visit the village, do you make the people smile??
The question stunned Sanae for an instant. She thought over her last visit, with the shopkeeper who needed some change and the mother who she?d reunited with her child. She had helped, but not in a manner befitting of a god.
?Well, yes, but-?
?There you go.? Kanako put a finger on Sanae?s lips, silencing her. ?You don?t have to do something grand like bless a harvest or end a drought to win faith. Something as simple as staying over for a drink or making them laugh is enough.?
That sounded almost too simple for Sanae. She tried to object, but Kanako still pressed her lips shut.
?Faith comes from trust, Sanae. Even if people just trust you to bring a smile to their face, that?s enough. The days of being a distant deity are over - nowadays it?s best to just be a friend to your followers rather than an authority.?
She spoke the words with such power that Sanae couldn?t help but believe them. She forced out a nod, and Kanako pulled the finger from her lips with a smile.
?I know you try your best, Sanae, but you need to lighten up a little.? She ruffled at Sanae?s hair. ?You?re still a little girl. Don?t be afraid to live a little, alright??
Sanae nodded again. She felt warm as her god?s faith seeped into her body, pouring strength back into her.
?Thank you, Lady Kanako.? She managed a grin of her own. ?But I have one more question.?
?And what?s that??
Sanae pointed behind her goddess. ?How does Lady Suwako get by??
Suwako was seated on the floor, locked in a staring contest with her own hat. A half-chuckle popped out of Kanako?s mouth.
?Well, Suwako is...a friend, I suppose.? Kanako scratched at her head, struggling to find the right words. ?Sometimes she?s a bit frustrating, true, but she certainly brings a lot of life to the shrine. I have a lot of faith in her, so in a way I?m sustaining both of us.?
Sanae?s mouth formed a tiny o. They must have been very close friends if Kanako had managed to deal with her all this time.
?Besides, what would happen if we let her loose on Gensokyo?? Kanako turned back to Sanae, her voice hushed. ?I don?t need to remind you about that robot thing she-?
Kanako?s speech was interrupted by Suwako?s hat landing neatly on her head.
?I heard that.? Suwako spoke with a wry grin. ?And last I checked, that nuclear reactor you built in the underground was a lot more dangerous than my overgrown blimp.?
Kanako?s reaction was delayed by a few seconds. Slowly she pulled the hat off of her head, ignoring the stare its taped-on eyes were giving her.
?Sanae, could you help the tengu prepare for tonight?s service? Suwako and I need to have a talk.?
Sanae knew her gods well enough to tell what that was a euphemism for. She nodded, rapidly backpedaling out of the room. The two goddesses stepped a few paces from each other, lowering themselves into fighting stances. Kanako clicked her fingers, bringing an onbashira into existence at her side. With another click she made the wooden pillar spin in the air to point at her opponent. Across from her, Suwako?s eyes glinted as a pair of iron rings formed in her hands.
?Try not to break anything!? Sanae yelled before closing the door behind her. The two gods came to blows every other day, but by the time the evening service came around they were back to being best friends again. Their relationship was unusual at best, but at least Kanako cleaned up after herself.
But do all gods fight that often? Sanae placed a hand on her chin, walking away as the sounds of battle erupted behind her. She had long since been desensitised to it. I should find myself a rival. Maybe Reimu would be up for a bout...
-
>Rou writing something canonical with no water
WHAT IS THIS
?There you go.? Kanako put a finger on Sanae?s lips, silencing her. ?You don?t have to do something grand like bless a harvest or end a drought to win faith. Something as simple as staying over for a drink or making them laugh is enough.?
THERE, THERE, I FOUND THE WATER REFERENCE!
:3
-
I really like it!
-
And now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
-----
Genius was not a word Sakuya was fond of.
There was nothing wrong with the word itself. It slipped cleanly off the tongue, and it carried an air of authority and power. Regardless, there was only so long she could hear Patchouli use the word before her patience ran dry.
?Genius?, in Patchouli?s case, had become an excuse. A genius had better things to do than eat dinner with the rest of the household. It was blasphemy to suggest they engage in any form of social interaction. And above all, a genius couldn?t possibly be expected to keep her own library clean. This meant the duty inevitably fell to Sakuya, as chief maid of the Scarlet Devil Mansion.
Sakuya sighed to herself. Patchouli was a close friend of the mistress, and as a magician she was just about unparalleled. Neither of these facts stopped her from being a nuisance to work with sometimes. In the last week she?d sent Sakuya off to fetch half a dozen rare ingredients from across Gensokyo, all without a word of thanks. Aggravating was too light a word to describe the feeling.
?With any luck, I won?t run into her today,? Sakuya grumbled. She?d just finished cleaning up after yesterday?s soiree. The mistress tended to hold ?elegant dinner parties? for her friends throughout Gensokyo. Like most celebrations, it ended with gratuitous servings of alcohol and a room full of youkai who barely had the mental faculty to stand. The mistress herself would be caught in the throes of her hangover until the evening at the very least.
After a morning like that, the last thing Sakuya wanted was for her normal rounds to be any more complicated. She hadn?t tended to the library for almost a week, and her pride as a maid refused to let it go unchecked for any longer. She made long, confident strides towards the basement, ignoring the gaudy crimson wallpaper that attacked her eyes from every direction. She walked past dozens of identical, unlabeled doors - one of the mansion?s many defense mechanisms. Some led to rooms, others to traps, and others still led to nothing at all. Only Sakuya herself knew the full layout of the mansion, and it was not a secret she planned to share with anyone.
At last the journey brought her to a small staircase, and at its foot was an ornate wooden door. There was an inscription built into the oak in an archaic language Sakuya neither read nor cared about. Paying it no mind, she pulled the door open and put one foot through the doorway.
Immediately a stinging cold struck her leg, and she jerked backwards out of reflex. Her foot was damp, little water droplets falling from her sock. Her heart leaped as she stared through the open doorway.
A wall of water separated the library from the rest of the mansion. The library itself was entirely submerged. Seaweed had emerged through the cracks in its wooden planks. Coral crept across the bookshelves. The occasional fish fluttered past, eyes wide open as if it had no idea where it was.
All things considered, Sakuya handled the discovery relatively well. This wasn?t the first time Patchouli had revamped her wing of the mansion without warning. She?d turned the room into a cavern once, which had been a nightmare for Sakuya to clean up after. It was a Wednesday, too - and if Sakuya remembered her dates, that meant Patchouli was most in tune with the element of water today. With that in mind, flooding the library seemed almost like a natural decision.
Still one that got in the way of her cleaning, though. It would be difficult to tend to a library of this size if breathing was no longer an option.
?Patchouli?? Sakuya came as close to the wall of water as possible, hoping her voice would echo further in. ?I think we need to discuss something.?
Of course, Patchouli didn?t respond. Her desk, that slab of wood where she could be found more often than not, was in one of the deepest corners of the room. Sakuya waited for almost a minute, getting no answer for her trouble.
She took a moment to consider her options. Contacting the mistress was not an option - in her current state, Remilia wouldn?t respond to anything that wasn?t a vial of fresh blood. She could visit the kappa for one of those breathing devices they were so fond of, but that seemed like too much effort when it came to cleaning one room. Or she could just leave the room unchecked, but her pride as a maid meant that was the worst possible option by default.
Which left one course of action, one that she hadn?t wanted to try unless there were no other possibilities. She gripped at her temples, making no attempt to hide her frustration.
?Koakuma.?
When it came to naming familiars, Patchouli was horrendously uninventive. Koakuma was the young demon she had made a contract with to serve as an assistant around the library. As a servant, she was utterly faithful to her master - the rest of the mansion, though, was a different story.
Soon after Sakuya called for her, the demon appeared on the other side of the wall of water. She was dressed in a black bikini, along with snorkeling gear from the outside world. Her wings flapped in time with her flippers as she swam towards the entrance, offering Sakuya a casual wave. No bubbles drifted from the snorkel - after all, demons only breathed when they felt like it.
Koakuma stepped out onto dry land, and Sakuya stepped back to give her room. The demon pulled off the mask and snorkel, taking a deep breath as she stretched her arms.
?Ahh, that was refreshing. Haven?t had a good swim in centuries.? She turned to Sakuya, offering a stiff salute. ?Morning, chief maid. How can I help you today??
She had that too-innocent look that Sakuya had learned to dislike over the years. The maid had learned that the best way to deal with Koakuma was simply to give her no room for her usual antics, and thus she kept her words short and simple.
?I?d like to talk to Patchouli, if you don?t mind.?
Koakuma?s eyes widened. ?The master? Well, she?s where you?d usually find her.? She motioned towards the doorway with both arms.
?I guessed that,? Sakuya muttered. ?But some of us have lungs that we are very fond of.?
Koakuma tilted her head with childish curiosity. ?Wait...surely you can conjure a basic water breathing charm? That?s Magic 101, Sakuya. In all the time you?ve been around the master, she hasn?t even taught you that??
Sakuya could almost touch the sarcasm oozing from Koakuma?s voice. It was very tempting to punch her, but she still needed the demon?s help. She took a deep breath, filing her temper into a distant corner of her mind.
?She hasn?t, actually. I?ve had enough work on my plate without being the magician?s apprentice as well.?
Koakuma pouted, every action a little too dramatic. ?Aww, that?s a shame. The master is busy right now, and I?ve been ordered not to disturb her.? In an instant her frown morphed into a devilish smirk. ?But it?s different if you want to talk to her, and I know a charm or two that?ll get you into the library without that drowning thing you humans do sometimes. Interested??
This was exactly what Sakuya had been worried about. She was at Koakuma?s mercy now. The devil probably knew several charms that would let Sakuya breathe underwater, and she wouldn?t hesitate to go for the most embarrassing. It would be much less of a hassle if she just said no and let the library clean itself today.
No. Sakuya shook her head, a proud stubbornness welling up inside her. She had decided to tend to the library today. That was what she would do, come hell or high water. Literally, in the case of the latter.
?That?d be great, thanks.? Sakuya bowed towards the devil, wearing a look of false gratitude. ?Do I need to find you any ingredients from the vault??
Koakuma shook her head. ?No worries. This oughta be simple enough.? She held her arms out, muttering words beneath her breath, and a dark blue magic circle came into existence at Sakuya?s feet. ?Now, if you could just stay still for a moment...?
The devil continued to murmur. The light of the magic circle grew brighter. Sakuya fought to keep her nerves from overwhelming her. It was just a water-breathing spell. There was no way Koakuma could make anything too terrible out of this.
Right?
-----
?I swear, one of these days I am going to learn how to perform an exorcism.?
As usual, Sakuya had underestimated Koakuma?s devilish streak. She gave the demon another glare as they ventured into the library.
?Hey, I gave you what you wanted.? Koakuma shrugged, swimming on her back and staring at the ceiling. ?You can breathe now, right??
?Yes, but was all of this necessary?? Sakuya motioned to herself, taking the chance to look down at the devastation Koakuma had wrought. She had lost almost a foot of height, leaving her around the same size as her mistress. Gone was the maid uniform and all of its quiet dignity - now she was dressed in a dark blue swimsuit with gaudy white frills. She wore comically large flippers, and in one hand she was carrying a magic wand with a pocketwatch built into the tip. She had tried to throw it away before, but the damned thing came back to her as if she was a magnet.
Koakuma pouted again. ?Awww, you don?t like it? But I think you look so cute in that outfit. Don?t you like being Sakuya the Time Diver??
No. No, she didn?t. And ?cute? was the last adjective Sakuya wanted connected to her. She did her best to ignore Koakuma entirely as she swam deeper into the library, one clumsy fin-kick after another.
The makeover of the library had been more thorough than she?d first thought. The wooden bookshelves had been encased in a coat of pebbles to keep them dry. The books themselves hummed with power - a simple spell to make them waterproof, Sakuya assumed. Rays of sunlight fell from the ceiling, feeding the plants and weeds with natural light. A gentle current circled around the room - nothing strong enough to stop Sakuya, but enough to keep the schools of fish on one side of the library.
Behind the current, in the furthest corner of the basement, Patchouli?s desk had seen an overhaul as well. Shells and gems were built into its sides, and its surface was covered with sand. Patchouli was in her usual spot, eying over a tattered book and taking notes on it. She wrote with a pen shaped like an octopus? tentacle, the ink clinging to the paper in spite of the environment.
These were all secondary observations for Sakuya. The first thing she noticed was that Patchouli?s legs had been replaced with a long violet fish-tail. Two fins poked out behind her ears, and a sash across her chest protected her modesty. Her hair bounced about in the water, waving left and right but always keeping out of its owner?s face. All things considered, she pulled off the mermaid look surprisingly well.
In typical fashion, Patchouli didn?t even notice their arrival. It took a long clearing of the throat from Koakuma to get her attention.
?Koakuma, I thought I told you not to interrupt me unless-? Patchouli stopped short, looking up from her study for long enough to see Sakuya. She craned her head forward, squinting for a better look. ?That?s strange. I never knew Sakuya had a daughter.?
It took every ounce of self-control Sakuya had not to scream. Her face flushed bright red as she gained a sudden interest in the floor. At her side, Koakuma begin to giggle and prod her shoulder.
?Actually, master, it?s a funny story.? The devil wrapped an arm around Sakuya, using the other hand to ruffle at the maid?s hair. ?I found this little girl at the front door and she looked kinda lost, so I was thinking we could adopt her and-?
Sakuya only got one hit, but she made it count. She buried her elbow right into Koakuma?s solar plexus. The devil careened backwards, clutching at her stomach while letting off a tiny howl. Maybe her body was smaller, but Sakuya hadn?t lost an ounce of her adult strength.
Patchouli stared at the limp body of her assistant in the same way a statistician would look at a number. ?I thought I asked you to stop abusing my subordinates.?
?Maybe you should ask your subordinates to stop giving me good reasons.? Sakuya crossed her arms, giving Patchouli the sternest look she could muster. Given her current size and outfit, this was much less threatening than she would have liked.
Patchouli sighed, waving one hand in Koakuma?s direction. The current intensified, carrying the devil off into the distance. When her assistant was out of sight, she turned her attention back to Sakuya. ?So what reason did you have for interrupting me at work??
?Well, it was cleaning duty to start with, but I?m not sure what good a feather duster will be in a room like this.? Sakuya motioned at the water surrounding her. ?I understand if you want to change up the decor once in a while, but isn?t this a little too far??
The magician gave Sakuya a deadpan expression. ?I can assure you, I didn?t go to all of this effort to improve my feng shui. I?ve been hard at work.? She picked up the book in front of her, turning it around and holding it in front of Sakuya?s face. ?Take this, for example. What do you see??
Sakuya stared at the pages, blinking rapidly. She could make out characters and symbols pulsing on the paper, in yet another language she couldn?t comprehend.
?I don?t get it,? she said plainly.
?Of course you don?t. It?s Atlantean. As in the ancient civilisation.? Patchouli pulled the book back onto the desk. She eyed the page, scribbled more notes, then flipped over to the next one. ?They were very secretive, you know. Their tomes were written in a very special ink that?s only visible underwater.?
Sakuya raised an eyebrow. ?Then couldn?t you have just used a bucket of water? Or even the pool we had installed in here a while back.?
Patchouli frowned. ?On Monday, maybe. Tuesday, perhaps. But Wednesday, the day when water bends to my will?? She rose up from her desk, waving her tail about slightly and spreading out her arms. ?I wouldn?t be able to take myself seriously if I didn?t take a chance to test my skills. A genius does not rest on her laurels, Sakuya.?
Genius. Again with that word. Sakuya flinched. When Patchouli used the word, it carried an air of self-importance that didn?t sit well with the maid. There was a certain smugness that Sakuya couldn?t put a finger on, something vaguely annoying she couldn?t find the words for.
She grumbled again. It wasn?t worth thinking about. For now, she?d just do her duties and move on.
?So, how am I supposed to clean up now?? Sakuya scratched at her head. ?Should I tend to the walls with a mop??
?Actually,? Patchouli said with a wave of a hand, ?I don?t think you?ll be needed around here today.?
Sakuya hesitated. ?...Eh??
?Did I stutter?? Patchouli said, her ear-fins twitching. ?I think the water?s done a good job of washing up the dust and grime around the library. When I dismiss it at the end of the day, it should take most of the dust with it. In fact, it might not be an exaggeration to say it?s done your job for you.?
Sakuya?s mouth hung open. Tending to the library was one of the most time-consuming duties she was in charge of. It could involve hours of hard labour, depending on how long Patchouli had left it unattended for. She?d made plans for the day based on that, only to find that there was a gaping hole in her schedule.
Patchouli smiled. ?You were up late making up for Remi?s antics last night, weren?t you?? There was an almost maternal glint in her eyes that made Sakuya gasp. ?If you finish up your rounds early enough, you might be able to get a quick nap in before dinner.?
Sakuya couldn?t think of anything to say, and for someone like her that was extremely rare. For an instant she had seen a glimpse of the woman behind the snark - a woman who actually could care for the people close to her. She finally understood why the mistress had placed so much faith in Patchouli. Behind the quips and the jibes, there really was a dependable friend locked up inside that fragile body.
Not that Sakuya would be caught saying something like that, of course. She cleared her throat, letting her blushing subside before she responded.
?Thanks, Patchouli. But while I?m here...? She motioned at herself again, refusing to give her outfit another glance. ?Is there anything you could do about this? My self-esteem has been haemorrhaging ever since Koakuma forced it onto me.?
Patchouli squirmed in her chair, as if the request had been an accusation. After a moment of silent thought, she let out a heaving sigh. ?Well, since you?ve come all the way out here to check on me, I suppose it?s the least I can offer in reparation.? She held a hand out, murmuring like Koakuma had, and another blue circle emerged under Sakuya?s feet. ?I assume you?d like to hold onto the water-breathing for a while longer.?
?That would be wonderful, yes.? Sakuya rolled her eyes.
Patchouli managed another small smile. With one final swing of her hand, she brought the magic circle to life with a flash of blue light. It engulfed Sakuya for an instant, spreading outwards before fading as quickly as it had emerged.
As Sakuya opened her eyes again, the world felt a little smaller around her. She grabbed at the hem of her maid uniform, and immediately she felt relief flood her system. Another minute in that outfit and she would have given herself an aneurysm.
?Thank you, Patchouli,? she said with a nod. ?Shall I have Koakuma bring you your dinner when it?s ready??
?That would be wonderful, thanks.? Now it was the magician?s turn to smirk. ?You can take her off my hands until then, if you want. I?d like to be alone with my work.?
That was just the opening Sakuya had been hoping for. The two of them shared a dark smile before Sakuya made her way back to the entrance, retracing her steps towards the library?s entrance. This uniform was a little less aerodynamic than her old one, but it was considerably less shameful.
As she opened the door out of the basement, Sakuya felt the water rise off of her on its own. It left her bone-dry, the droplets floating in the air for an instant before zipping back where they?d come from. Another charm Patchouli had thrown in, she thought to herself. The magician must have understood that a maid in a soaked uniform wasn?t much of a maid at all.
?Surprise!?
Something leaped out from behind the corner with blistering speed. Sakuya saw the camera in its hand just before the flash hit her. She shielded herself, but she was moments too late.
?A-ha!? Koakuma held the camera aloft. ?I got it! Sakuya the Time Diver, on camera! Just wait until Remi...? She stopped for a moment, getting a chance to actually look at Sakuya. What she found was not what she was looking for. ?Until Remi...sees...this...?
So the devil had been aiming for a public shaming as well. Something else to add to her growing list of crimes. Sakuya stomped towards her with a cool confidence.
?Koakuma, do you feel like helping me with the dusting??
The demon opened her mouth to object, but unseen energies held her lips together. It was part of her contract - Patchouli had given an order, and Koakuma had no choice but to obey it. She was pale and lifeless as Sakuya took her by the wrist, dragging her along the corridors of the mansion. The look of horror on her face was enough to make the whole ordeal worthwhile.
?We?ve only got the kitchen to tend to now. I?ll let you handle that part.? Sakuya put on a smug grin of her own. ?You should be okay. The rats aren?t that big...?
-
Dammit Rou! Now I have multielemental form Patchy stuck in my mind. Do you know how long I'm going to spend trying to figure out a proper Sun Patchouli?!
-
Consider this experimentation more than anything. Since it's probably ~*~Too Hot For MotK~*~, I'm linking to it indirectly.
Behind Closed Doors (WARNING - NSFW Content) (http://archiveofourown.org/works/513856)
-
Hm. That's not quite how I was expecting that to go~
-
BACK TO YOUR USUAL FAMILY-FRIENDLY DIVER STORIES
-----
Life was good.
Nazrin stretched her arms out, slipping her tail through one of the gaps in her deck chair. The sun hung over her head, turning every grain of sand a brilliant gold. She absently looked out at the youkai wading into the ocean, splashing each other and giggling like schoolgirls.
She pulled the sunglasses closer to her face, just to make sure no-one saw her ogling.
That fairy has a nice figure, she thought to herself. Wondered when she?d get in the water. Guess she finished burying her friend in the sand.
A smirk rose onto Nazrin?s face. She looked over to a bird youkai who?d lost her bikini-top, and her rabbit friend who was hastily running off with it. A snorkel poked its tip out of the water as its owner surfaced - a well-tanned fox with piercing yellow eyes.
This is the best job in the world, Nazrin thought to herself. I get to look at all the girls I want, and I?m getting paid for it.
The moment that thought ran through Nazrin?s head, a hand smacked into her face.
?Ow!? Nazrin flinched, legs jerking outwards. She pulled the glasses off to look up at her assailant.
?Afternoon, private.? Murasa Minamitsu hung over her, arms folded and eyes adamant. The usual baggy sailor uniform hung from her. A real waste, Nazrin thought to herself. The sailor probably had a decent body hidden under there.
?I haven?t interrupted your sightseeing, have I?? the sailor growled. Nazrin gulped.
?Uh...no, ma?am. I?m just watching for trouble on the beach like I?m supposed to.?
?Then what are these reports of a fairy going missing??
Nazrin pointed at a heap of sand in the distance with a giant X drawn on it. ?She?s in there. Tell her friends they can dig her out whenever they feel like it.?
Murasa hesitated. Nazrin let a smug grin roll onto her lips as she gave the sailor a wink. See? I was paying attention. Internally, she thanked every god she knew that the fairy in question had a cute companion.
?...Regardless.? Murasa sat down next to Nazrin - or at least, she tried to. The ghost could only become solid through conscious effort, so half of her thigh ended up sinking into the sand. ?Private, we need to have a talk about your little pets.?
Nazrin groaned. ?This conversation again? Boss, I?ve told you a dozen times that the mice are doing a better job of running the Lost and Found than I ever could.?
?They?re mice.? Murasa grabbed at her temples. ?When people come to the beach, the last thing they wanna see is a rat running around and picking things up off the ground.?
?And they?re going to be okay if it?s a mouse youkai doing it instead?? Nazrin rolled her eyes and shuffled her glasses back on. ?If you don?t want the rats working the stand, get someone else to do it. Just don?t complain when stuff goes missing and stays missing.?
As usual, Murasa went awkwardly silent after that. The coastguards were already running on a shoestring budget. They couldn?t afford another employee, especially not one with all those fancy qualifications that lifeguards were supposed to have. She held her hands up in defeat, floating off the sand and turning back towards the mangy hut they called a base.
?You win this round, private.? Murasa clenched a fist. ?But if I see you put one foot out of line, I?ll-?
?Heeelp!?
The threat was cut short by a cry in the distance. Nazrin looked out into the water, seeing a child struggling out in one of the deeper patches. She leaped out of the chair, adrenaline suddenly rushing through her body.
?Sorry, boss. Gotta run.?
She left Murasa trailing in her dust as she dashed into the water, breaking into a swim once she was up to her waist. Maybe she didn?t have a piece of paper to prove it, but she knew what she was doing in the ocean.
The girl was barely keeping herself afloat, arms flapping at her sides as she kept yelling. Nazrin dipped just under the surface, grabbing the girl by the waist and holding her up.
?Aaah-aah??
The yelling came to a halt the moment Nazrin grabbed her. The little girl looked puzzled more than anything, and didn?t say a word until they were back on the shore.
?You alright?? Nazrin saying, laying the girl on the ground. She had yellow hair with black stripes, and her swimsuit was red with stars running along it. It?d look good on someone older, but this girl was too young for Nazrin?s tastes.
?Uh...umm...? The girl couldn?t get the words out, her face rapidly going red. Nazrin frowned.
?Is it that hard to say thank you??
?N-No, it?s not that!? The girl grabbed at her chest, looking off into the distance. ?It?s just that I?ve never been kissed before, and Mama told me not to-?
?Wait. Kissed?? Nazrin was torn between dismay and bewilderment.
?Yeah. That thingy you do to people when you pull them out of the water.? The child?s nerves got the better of her, and she forced her eyes shut. ?Just...be gentle with me, alright??
Nazrin resisted the urge to throw the girl back into the water. Barely.
-----
It was best to deal with this by the book, Nazrin decided. If Murasa found out she hadn?t ticked every box on her paperwork, it?d be a good enough excuse to throw her out. She led the little girl into the worn-down shack the coastguards called a base, holding her hand the whole way along.
The base had just enough room for Nazrin to fit her new companion in. The wooden hut was covered in poorly-kept equipment and warning signs that no-one bothered to read. She nearly tripped on a stray diving mask, tip-toeing around bolts and screws that had fallen out of their respective gadgets. A metal-plated door separated the main room from Murasa?s office - a ship?s steering wheel had been taped to the front to prevent any confusion as to who it belonged to. There were a couple of chairs in the corner - Nazrin took one for herself and left the other for her new companion, grabbing a towel and throwing it at the tiger.
?OK, let?s deal with this as quickly as possible,? Nazrin said. The time she spent here was time she could spend on ?duty?. What if that pretty fairy was gone by the time she got back?
?First off,? she said, raising a finger. ?What?s your name??
The girl glared at Nazrin. ?Mama says I?m not meant to tell my name to strangers. And if you?re gonna offer me candy she told me not to take that either.?
Typical. Nazrin bit her lip, holding back a profanity. She took a moment to let her temper pass.
?Fine, whatever. Just tell me where I can find your folks so I can get you back home.?
The child opened her mouth to answer, then stopped. She pursed her lips, twiddling her thumbs.
?Ummm...I don?t wanna.?
Nazrin ground her teeth together. ?I just saved your life. Do you think you could offer me a little cooperation here??
?I said I don?t wanna.? Now the girl was pouting, puffing her cheeks out and stubbornly staring at the wall. Nazrin was suddenly grateful she had no plans of ever becoming a mother.
?Look, kid, you?ve got two options. Either you help me out, or I send you off to my boss.? She looked in the direction of the captain?s quarters. ?And trust me, you do not want to go there.?
The girl shivered. ?R-Really? Is your boss scary??
Nazrin smirked. ?Oh, she?s terrifying.? She stood up, holding her arms out and putting on her deepest voice. ?The legends say that she died at sea, but she came back to haunt little girls who don?t do as they?re toooold...?
Now the little tiger was tearing up, shaking so hard she looked ready to fall off her chair. That look was enough to give Nazrin a little bit of catharsis.
?A-A-And what does she do to those little girls?? she stammered.
The mouse put on her cruelest grin. ?Why, she tickles them. Forever and ever and ever, even when they?re trying to sleep or go to the bathroom or-?
?Hauuuu!? The girl finally gave in, cupping her hands around the back of her head. ?O-Okay, okay! Just don?t send me in to see the scary lady!?
Success! Nazrin reached down to pat the tiger on the head as she sat back down. The girl let out a low growl, nuzzling at Nazrin?s fingers. It was cute, in a condescending sort of way.
?Right, let?s start again. What?s your name??
?Shou.? The name jumped off the girl?s tongue like a bullet. ?Shou Toramaru.?
?There we go. Was that so hard?? She scratched behind Shou?s ear, and the tiger gave her a tiny purr. This was almost too easy now. ?OK, for the bonus question - where?s your family??
?In one of those little cottages on the cliff. One of the holiday homes.?
Nazrin smiled. She could be there and back in ten minutes, and still have plenty of time for ?sightseeing?. Maybe she?d even get a bonus for her hard work.
?Alright, then. Let?s get you home.? She reached out to take the girl?s hand. Shou looked up at it, but kept her hands firmly at her sides. The little tiger?s eyes started to well up.
?B-But I lost my shiny...?
Nazrin?s cheer quickly faded away. Why couldn?t any of her jobs be simple nowadays? It wasn?t enough to save a life anymore - now she had to go on fetch quests for her patients as well.
?What shiny?? she asked, trying to hide her frustration.
Shou looked up, trying to describe the problem with her limited vocabulary. ?It was this shiny lamp thingy. Mama called it a pagoda or something. It was really pretty and expensive and-?
?You dropped it into the water?? Nazrin finished the sentence on Shou?s behalf. The tiger nodded, hanging her head in shame.
?I tried to follow it, but I can?t swim very well.? She stopped for a beat, then corrected herself. ?Okay, I can?t swim at all. But if Mama finds out I?ve lost her shiny, she?s gonna be really really mad at me...?
Now Shou?s eyes were brimming with tears, and the tiger rubbed her arm against her face as she started to sob. If the girl had been pathetic before, there were no words for how she looked now. Nazrin felt embarrassed simply by proxy. Her first instinct was to push the girl out the door and tell her the pagoda was long gone, but that would mean forcing this teary little child onto someone else.
That was something Nazrin didn?t want to be held responsible for.
?Do you want me to go search for it?? she asked. Shou?s sniffling stopped, and she looked up again after one wipe of her eyes.
?Really? You can do that??
?We?ve got a few sets of diving equipment lying around here.? Nazrin lifted up a flipper from the pile of junk behind her. ?And I?ve got a bit of a knack for finding things. I?ll take a quick look for your little treasure, alright??
Shou?s face lit up like someone had just turned on the sun. ?T-Thank you, mousey lady!? She wrapped her arms around Nazrin?s waist, muttering ?thank you? over and over again. Nazrin gave the girl another comforting pat on the head.
?No worries. Looking after kids like you is part of my job. Now how about leaving me alone for a few minutes so I can suit up??
The tiger nodded, running out of the shack with tiny steps. Nazrin made sure she was out of peeking distance before digging into the pile of junk that she called an inventory.
Let?s hope they?ve finally invested in a larger helmet...
-----
They hadn?t.
As Nazrin stepped out of the shack, the main feeling running through her mind was claustrophobia. It had taken her two minutes to fit her ears into the tiny glass helmet, and even now they were packed in against the side of her head. Her typically excellent hearing had been downgraded to merely average - never mind quite how ridiculous she looked in it.
Shou?s jaw dropped the moment she saw Nazrin emerge. She seemed uncertain whether to laugh or sigh. ?Um...that looks sort of painful.?
?Learn from my mistake, kid.? Nazrin waved as she waddled towards the water, wearing one blue flipper and one pink. ?If you ever get involved a business, make sure it has a steady source of income.?
Shou was polite enough to avert her gaze. So were most of the other beachgoers, looking up at Nazrin for an instant before making a point of turning the other direction. It was almost a relief when Nazrin managed to enter the water and leave that awkward atmosphere behind.
I hope that kid?s parents are rich. We could really use a donation right about now.
For all her low-budget antics, the gear more or less did its job. The tank strapped to her back would give her about half an hour to search, which would be more than enough if the pagoda was still in the area. Nazrin took a moment to acclimate to her new surroundings, phasing out the gurgling noises the helmet made every time she took a breath.
Even the local wildlife seemed keen to avoid Nazrin. Schools split apart to move around her, and she swore she saw something hiding behind a coral reef to stay out of her way. Grumbling to herself, Nazrin grabbed at the pendant around her neck and focused her thoughts.
Come on, pagoda. Come ooooon, pagoda.
Her ears wiggled against the helmet as she tried to make out a trace of the artifact. The outfit wasn?t just uncomfortable - it was hampering her powers, as well. On land she?d have detected the pagoda in an instant - down here, it took her half a minute to find something that resembled a signal.
When it came at last, the pendant let out a dim light. She could hear a distant humming from the depths beneath her.
Better than nothing, I guess. Shrugging her shoulders, Nazrin dove further into the water. The ocean grew darker as she descended, but never quite far enough to hamper her vision. She scouted out the ground beneath her, looking for the telltale twinkle of something valuable.
When she reached the seabed, there was still nothing to be found. She?d have discarded it as a false lead, except the humming was getting louder. She was getting ready to start digging into the sand when she managed to zero in on the source of the noise.
Oh, for crying out loud...
Lying in front of Nazrin was a giant oyster, almost twice as large as she was. The edges had been decorated with swirls of red paint and what seemed to be glitter. The words ?VISITORS: PLEASE KNOCK? had been written across the top of the oyster using a variety of shells and stones.
Nazrin complied, tapping at the roof of the oyster with her knuckles. Within a second it snapped open, and a voice leaped out from inside to greet her.
?Welcome, welcome, welcome to Fumi?s Flotsam Fleamarket!? A young mermaid was seated in the center of the oyster, stretching her arms out like she was ready to embrace her customer. Surrounding her were various bits and bobs - some valuable, some worthless, all relentlessly shiny. ?If you?re looking for bargains on air-breather refuse, you?ve come to the right pla-? She opened her eyes, finally looking on her visitor for the first time. Her enthusiasm quickly vanished. ?Oh. It?s you.?
Nazrin nodded, her eyebrows furrowing. ?Still trying to make a living off of other people?s goods, I see.?
Fumi stuck up her nose, her long blue hair billowing about in the water. ?You don?t have to make it sound like that. If you air-breathers threw this stuff away, you obviously didn?t want anything to do with it.?
?I told you not to run your business right on my doorstep,? Nazrin growled.
Fumi raised an eyebrow. ?And what law is there that?ll stop me? Finders keepers.?
It was tempting to show the mermaid exactly where she could stick that snark, but fighting a water-breather on her own turf seemed like a poor move. Nazrin sighed, letting the anger seep out along with her air bubbles.
?So can I assume you just got something new in stock??
Fumi?s eyes glistened. ?Ohh, you have a discerning eye, don?t you?? She shuffled out of her shell and rummaged through her private collection. She dug into a pile, pulling out a pristine 5-yen coin, shortly followed by a sewing needle and a handheld mirror. ?C?mon, I put it in here somewhere...?
Nazrin floated in place, crossing her legs. She?d be okay with the waiting if she wasn?t acting on a time limit. She looked absent-mindedly at her air gauge until the mermaid finally finished her search.
?Aha! Here it is.? Fumi rubbed at the object with one hand before spinning around to present it. Nazrin was almost blinded as the jeweled pagoda came into view, pulsing with a supernatural light. It was hopelessly ornate, and probably worth more than three months of Nazrin?s wages.
?I happened upon this little sucker just an hour ago,? the mermaid said with a grin. ?On a scale of one to shiny, I?m pretty sure it?s right up there. Looks vintage, too. There?s no way I?m letting it go for any less than fifteen-hundred shells.?
Fumi?s eyes sparkled as she looked over the pagoda. She was already in love with it, Nazrin thought to herself. That was going to make this negotiation even harder than it already was.
?I?m guessing you don?t offer a return policy? See, that thing belongs to a little girl, and-?
The mermaid cut her short, holding a palm right against the mouse?s helmet. ?I don?t see anyone?s name on it. And don?t gimme the little girl argument - I?ve had people try to cheat me outta my merchandise plenty of times already.?
The mouse groaned, bubbles seeping out of her helmet with a low whine. That argument had never worked before, but it was worth trying. She racked her brain, trying to find some way of luring the goods out of Fumi?s grasp. She couldn?t pay for it - she had no idea what fifteen hundred shells was worth in land-money, but it was definitely out of her price range.
An idea struck her, something just stupid enough to work.
?How about a trade??
Fumi blinked. ?Excuse me? What do you plan to offer me??
Nazrin smirked, reaching down and poking at her heel. ?These flippers, obviously.? She gave them a kick, twirling about to show them off. ?They?re designer footwear among the air-breathers. Haven?t you ever noticed that all the divers are wearing them??
The mermaid?s eyes widened as she nodded along. ?Yes, I suppose they do. I always thought it was just their attempt to disguise themselves as one of us, but...? She looked down on her own tail, flapping it up and down, then turned back to Nazrin. ?If they?re so valuable, why are you wearing a different set every time I see you??
The mouse sighed, shaking her head. ?Oh, Fumi. Don?t you know anything about the fashion business up on land? Yesterday?s hot trend is today?s laughing stock. Blue-and-pink is only going to be in style for so long. It?s an expensive business, but I pride myself on staying up to date.?
The more Nazrin listened to herself, the more she had to fight the urge to laugh. Clearly she had a special talent for lying to children. Even though she could barely take herself seriously, Fumi was lost in thought over whether to take the offer. The mermaid turned back to the pagoda, a sad glimmer hanging in her eye.
?...Well, a good salesman has to always look her best.? She held a hand out to take the flippers. Nazrin smiled, peeling the fins off and handing them over. The mermaid stuck her hands into the footholes, wearing them as if they were gloves.
?Pleasure doing business,? Nazrin said as she picked the pagoda off the floor of the oyster. ?And I have to say, those look great on you.?
Fumi blushed. ?Ah, well, thanks. Have a good day!? She reached up for the roof of her home, closing it over to mark that their business was over.
As she swam for the surface again, Nazrin let out the laugh she?d been holding in for an age.
Honestly, is there anything I could tell her that she wouldn?t believe?
-----
?What do you mean, you lost your flippers??
Murasa leaned back in her chair so far that her back went right through the wood. Nazrin shrugged, still drying herself off with a nearby towel.
?I ran into a shark looking for that girl?s pagoda. Apparently plastic is a local delicacy around here.?
The lie came to her naturally. She could hardly tell her boss she had sold coastguard property to a mermaid.
?Then why didn?t it take half your foot off as well?? the captain asked.
Nazrin?s face didn?t even falter. ?It was a very picky eater.?
Murasa?s face scrunched up, like she?d swallowed half a dozen lemons in one gulp. Apparently Nazrin?s lying skills didn?t extend to anyone beyond the age of twelve.
?Well, whatever.? Murasa put her hands behind her head, lodging them somewhere inside her chair. ?That girl you rescued apparently has some very well-off parents, so I?m sure their donation will pay for the damages and then some.?
?That sounded almost like a compliment.? Nazrin smiled.
?Whatever helps you sleep at night, private.?
That was as close to praise as Nazrin was likely to get. She saluted, turning on her heels and making her way for the exit. There were still a few nice-looking ladies out there for her to inspect.
?Actually, before you go...? Murasa said.
Nazrin?s ears twitched as she stopped in place. ?Yes, boss??
The ghost held up a poorly drawn sealing amulet. ?Could you explain why I found this stuck to my door earlier today??
Nazrin walked back to the desk, grabbing the paper and reading it over.
Her heart sank.
Begone, foul tickle-monster of the sea!
Haunt our coasts no longer! -Shou
?Well?? Murasa had already cupped one hand around the anchor behind her chair. Nazrin felt a bead of sweat run down her forehead.
?It?s...well, it?s a long story...?
-
>Ctrl+F "water"
>No results
WHAT IS THIS
-----
The worst part of any gig was the morning after.
For the third time in a month, Mystia swore to herself she would never drink again. Her head ached to the point where she expected her brain to start seeping out of her ears. Every muscle in her body felt withered and dead, and her insides had churned into a fine paste.
When she opened her eyes at last, she found herself in her own little tree-house. She heard the familiar creaking of branches under the floor-planks, the whistling of wind through the window. A cursory glance around the room confirmed that she hadn?t even broken anything.
She sighed with relief. At least she had managed to pass out in her own home rather than someone else?s.
But how had she made it back here? Her recollection of the night came to a sudden halt at the afterparty. One of the oni who?d attended the concert had challenged her to a drinking contest. She?d accepted, of course - her pride refused to let her turn down a fight. Based on her current state, it was probably a safe assumption that she had lost.
She decided that what had happened after that was nothing important. Nothing valuable was missing from her home, and besides the hangover she hadn?t been hurt. She could look into her inebriated escapades another time. Preferably after a few more hours of sleep.
Her course of action decided, Mystia rolled over in bed and wrapped herself up in the blanket. She stopped short when her cheek rubbed against something cold and hard.
?Eh??
Something was lying on the pillow beside her. Her first instinct was to pay it no mind - among other things, it was surprisingly comfortable to put her head against. In reminded her of her time as a baby, resting on the inner shell of her-
Wait.
A wave of dread washed over Mystia, wiping away her hangover. She craned her neck sideways to take a look at the object that was hogging her pillow.
Lying next to her was a pristine, newly laid egg.
?Eeeeeh!??
Mystia jumped back far enough to take herself off of the bed, pulling the covers down with her. Her hangover was already a passing memory, the aches and pains fading away as something much more dangerous took precedence.
?What is this thing??
She spoke to herself, almost in denial. It couldn?t be real. It was just a really elaborate fake, right? One that looked just like an egg, felt just like an egg, and squirmed about like it was just about to hatch-
?Aah!?
As the first tiny cracks began to appear on the egg?s surface, Mystia?s last attempts to trick herself died out. This was no joke. In a few minutes, she would become the mother of a newborn child.
?Oh man.? Mystia walked up and down the room, wings flapping about behind her. ?Oh man oh man oh man oh man...?
She?d slept with someone last night. That was the only explanation. It was the only way to rationalise the chick that was about to crawl out of its shelter onto her bed. Even after all the times she?d managed to get herself drunk, none of them had gone as horribly as this.
Looking after the kid would only be the start of the problem. How was she meant to keep up with her normal life? How could she keep the lamprey stand running with a kid to look after? And perhaps most importantly of all, who was the father to her newfound kid?
A knock at the door drew all of Mystia?s attention.
?Myschi, you in there? You told me to check up on you if things went bad last night.?
Kyouko?s voice chilled Mystia?s blood. Of all the times for her bandmate to drop in, it had to be now. She took a deep breath and pried the door just open enough for her to poke her head out.
?Morning, Kyouko!? She plastered on the largest smile her face could fit. ?No need to worry about me. I?m fit as a fiddle, see? So you can just go back home and read your sutras or whatever it is you do.?
Kyouko took one look at the night-sparrow?s face and pouted. ?You sure? I saw you sink a dozen shots at the afterparty, and that?s about a dozen more than you can handle.?
?Well, I?m home, aren?t I?? Mystia let out a painfully fake laugh. ?Doesn?t really matter what I did last night if everything turned out okay.?
Kyouko didn?t buy it for an instant, the little yamabiko glaring at Mystia with unimaginable force. It was hard to believe that she was such a friendly monk when she wasn?t indulging in the punk-rock lifestyle.
Sweat dripped down the side of Mystia?s face. She couldn?t let Kyouko find out about the egg. What sort of rocker would she be if she had to hire a babysitter? If only there was some way to hide it-
Wait...that?s it!
Inspiration struck her like a hammer to the skull. ?Y?know what? Gimme a second.? She ran backwards into the room before Kyouko could open the door. There was only one way to keep this secret from getting out.
Slowly, carefully, Mystia lowered herself onto the egg.
?Meep...?
She could feel the chick squirming about inside the shell, rubbing along her skin in a bid for freedom. She folded her legs to be safe before calling out to the door.
?You can come in now, Kyouko. See? Nice and clean.?
Kyouko was at least polite enough not to open the door until she was told. She still looked unconvinced as she stepped in, but as she looked around the room her eyes stopped on nothing incriminating.
?Well?? Mystia put on a big grin again. ?What did I tell you? Nothing to worry about.?
?Yeah, but...? Kyouko bit her lip, struggling to find the words she was looking for. ?It?s not the house that?s looking weird right now.?
?Oh, uh. Really??
?Yes, really.? The yamabiko turned towards Mystia again, her arms folded in disapproval. ?You?re a really lousy liar, Myschi. Your wings flap like nuts whenever you?re trying to hide something.?
?They do not!? Mystia declared, ignoring her wings almost smacking into her face. ?I?m just trying to cool myself down.?
An awkward silence followed. Mystia felt the egg shuffle about more and more aggressively beneath her. Was the chick hatching already? Without thinking it through, she looked down on herself.
That was the hint that Kyouko needed. Her eyes widened momentarily before shifting back to a look of suspicion.
?Myschi, stand up.?
?Don?t wanna.? Mystia folded her arms and looked away with a sullen expression.
?Come on, Myschi,? Kyouko said in an almost pleading tone. ?We?re friends, right? Stop trying to hide things from me.?
?I?m not trying to hide anything.? Despite her best efforts, Mystia could feel her face going red. ?You?re just grasping at straws, and I?m starting to get offended by your-?
Before she could even finish the sentence, Kyouko?s hands were on her chest. The yamabiko shoved her backwards onto the bed, taking her entirely by surprise.
?Iyaa!?
Mystia?s head landed firmly on the pillow. She righted herself quickly, trying to sit down again before Kyouko caught on. She only needed one glance to tell she was too late - Kyouko was staring in awe at the spot where Mystia had been sitting.
The egg had hatched, and a tiny head was poking up from inside. Two beady eyes stared at Mystia with wonder.
?Mama?? the chick said as it continued to pull itself out of the egg. Mystia had no response - either for Kyouko, or for her newfound child. She felt like all of the bones had been ripped out of her body. She fell backwards on the bed, the reality of the situation finally catching up with her.
Kyouko kept her commentary short and sweet. ?I?m guessing we?re gonna have to cancel the rest of the tour. Later.?
Mystia nodded, struck dumb by the whole series of events. She didn?t even look up as Kyouko walked out, closing the door with a resounding slam. Her headache began to surface again, pulsing and throbbing in time with the baby?s cries.
?But I don?t wanna be a mother...?
-----
Success!
Ava pumped her fist, drifting away from her vantage point at the window. Her tiny wings flapped a little harder as she felt elation wash over her.
I can?t believe she took the bait that easily. Guess it?s a good thing she was drunk last night.
The whole thing had been a remarkable stroke of luck. Her child had been on the verge of hatching, but Ava's scavenger lifestyle brought home barely enough food for one mouth, let alone two. When she'd come across Mystia tripping over herself in a bid to get back home, the chance was too good to pass up. Ava had literally carried the night sparrow back home and tucked her into bed - from there, it was a simple case of planting the egg right next to her and letting Mystia draw her own conclusions.
Still, I'm gonna miss that little guy...
The cuckoo youkai began to pull away from the treehouse, retreating to her own nest a few minutes flight away. She picked up speed as she cleared the branches, her long white dress dancing in the wind. She brushed a few strands of her long purple hair to the side, wiping away a tear as she did so.
?Goodbye, little chickie,? she said with a sniffle. ?The rich rock lady will give you a better home than I ever could...?
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This story went from very funny to soul-crushingly depressing in the span of two seconds. :qq:
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I must agree I started reading that story thinking it would be funny yet at the end I find myself shedding a few tears I hope that mystia takes great care of that chick.
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Well, that's a first in Mystiafiction, I think.
I don't care how many people have said this to you, I don't mind being yet another person to say this to you, but goodness gracious, Rou. You're really paying off, what with all the whiplash-inducing plot twists you laid upon in the (X) stories of yours so far.
I would also love to see how this would play out as a full-blown story, too.
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[Excerpt from Kawashiro Monthly, Issue 34: Available now at all good vendors]
Mystia Lorelei: A Sparrow In The Sea (http://i.imgur.com/9HPmzxI.jpg)
Keisuke Mizumura sits down with one of the most unlikely stars of the kappa modeling circuit.
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When I first sit down with Mystia Lorelei, she?s got her face buried in a fresh towel. There?s a small puddle of water at her feet, droplets still sliding down her arms and legs. When she pops her head up, her hair is a ruffled, untidy mess - but it?s almost impossible to notice for the brightness of her smile.
?I?ve always wanted to be interviewed,? she tells me. ?It?s a sign I?ve finally managed to make it somewhere in this business.?
Mystia has just finished an elaborate modeling shoot for Kawashiro Incorporated, having spent the last few hours posing underwater to show off their latest line of diving gear. It?s a niche market, and one that Mystia is an unlikely herald for - most birds wouldn?t even touch the water, let alone submerge themselves in it. As she continues her toweling regimen, I can?t help but notice that her wings are completely dry.
Noticing my attention, Mystia smiles wryly. She digs into the pile of discarded gear at her side, pulling out a length of plastic film. ?I wrap these around my wings before I get in the water. Keeps them nice and fluffy.? She strokes one to demonstrate, the feathers still soft and flexible between her fingers.
She dismantles her equipment with a well-practiced hand, undoing a variety of clips and straps. When she?s done all she has left is her wetsuit - a sleek brown and white number that leaves little to the imagination. Unsurprisingly, she keeps that on.
?The shoot was...strange is really the only word I can use for it.? She sits firmly on a tree trunk, her wings slowly flapping in time with her thoughts. ?I mean, there?s an obvious problem with communication. The photographer had to bring a bunch of signs with him so he could point out exactly what he wanted me to do.? She rubs the small of her back with one hand. ?And those tanks are heavy, so it?s really hard to hold a pose.?
So what got Mystia involved in such an unnatural hobby for a youkai of her race? When I ask her, she?s quick to specify that it started purely as a business decision; she still runs a small lamprey stand on the edge of the human village, and matching the growing demand proved to be more difficult than she?d expected.
?I was just sticking my face in the water and hoping I?d find something.? She isn?t the sort to laugh at herself, but she lets out a rare chuckle at that. ?Thinking back on it, I probably looked like a maniac.?
She was on the verge of losing her business entirely when a friend of a friend happened upon her dilemma and offered her assistance. That acquaintance was Nitori Kawashiro, CEO of Kawashiro Incorporated.
?Nitori had just started her company then,? she tells me, looking up at the sky with the fondness of nostalgia. ?She needed someone to test out her gear, to show it was simple enough it wouldn?t take a kappa to use it. Our interests happened to collide, and things snowballed from there.?
Taking a look at the gear myself, I note that simplicity is definitely one of the key elements in its design. Pictures and diagrams are drawn next to key valves and hoses. Even the air gauge has a set of colourful drawings rather than numbers. It?s simple enough that it could be used even by an illiterate.
?It?s not that I can?t read,? the sparrow mutters when I bring it up. ?It?s that I don?t see why I should when I don?t have to. The letters are all so small, and don?t the pictures get the idea across anyway??
It quickly becomes apparent that Mystia?s most defining feature is her honestly - even on subjects most youkai would choose to brush over or outright ignore. I test the waters, so to speak, and ask her about the rumours that her blindness-curing lamprey is in fact a scam.
?Eh? Rumours?? Mystia tilts her head at the question, like it?s in a foreign language. ?I thought that was common fact by now. The lamprey doesn?t really cure anything - I give the humans a slight hint of night-blindness, and I take it away from them after they?ve gone through a few plates. Some would call it a swindle, but personally I think it?s just good business practice.?
At this point, I admit I?m a bit bewildered. I?ve done a variety of interviews over the years, but it?s uncommon for a subject to be so upfront about such a dangerous topic. Out of caution alone, I tell her we should probably keep that statement off of the record.
?And why exactly would I do that?? Mystia says. ?It?s not like any humans will ever get their hands on a kappa magazine. Especially not one as obscure as Nitori?s. I want the world to know just how snappy my idea is, and it?s your job to put it in print.?
She approaches potential scandal with an almost suicidal bravado. In fact, when I fail to respond to her request, she grabs a fin from the pile at the side and threatens to throw it at me. Her cockiness is unnerving, yet refreshing all at once.
Besides her contributions to Gensokyo?s culinary world, Mystia is also well renowned for her singing voice. She gained a considerable reputation by serenading her customers while they ate, and she?s one half of the cult-classic band Choujuu Gigaku.
?The band was just something that happened,? she admits in a rare moment of humility. ?We were two girls who wanted to scream at anything and everything. I didn?t expect people to get so into what we were doing. I suppose there?s a little bit of resentment in everyone, and we?re an outlet for them to let it all loose.?
The sparrow has achieved more in one lifetime than some youkai manage in several. Yet in spite of her success on multiple levels, Mystia does her best to keep her many lives separate from each other.
?I haven?t told her about the shoot,? she tells me, referring to her bandmate Kyouko Kasodani. ?It?s like...Choujuu Gigaku is one life, and the lamprey stand is another. It?d be really weird if she saw me wearing something so close-cut.?
And yet she?s fine with flaunting herself to the kappa en masse? ?That?s different. It?s not like I?ll meet these guys at band practice or at work. No-one?s going to come up to me and say ?Hey, Mystia! Your butt looked real nice on page five.?? She chuckles. ?Not that I need anyone to tell me that.?
A flirtatious rebel with a hint of business sense: it?s no surprise that Kawashiro Inc. lapped Mystia up to serve as their main mascot. And as the company gets bigger and bigger, their plans for Mystia grow more and more elaborate.
?They?re talking about sending me down in a cage for the next shoot,? she says. ?Something about coming face to face with a ?shark?. I have no clue what that means, but it sounds like fun. Besides, I?ll do pretty much anything if the pay is good.?
So does what does she have to say about her supplier? ?SCUBA is pretty cool, yeah. I mean, when I get through the day without drowning, I can only consider it a success.?
At this point, we?re cut short by the photographer coming in to show Mystia the results of her shoot. As I start walking away, I catch her reaction as he shows her the first photo.
I?ve never seen anyone so overjoyed by their own picture.
-----
This was half a response to the lovely picture linked in the headline (Thanks again to Sunderpep!) and half an experiment in trying a different style of writing. All in all I'm pretty happy with how it came out.
Bonus: Kyouko Learns About A Thing She Was Not Meant To Learn About (http://i.imgur.com/o7pWfom.png)
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Heh, cute ...
The link at the beginning is broken, though. :o
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The link at the beginning is broken, though. :o
Indeed it is! The artist likes changing her tumblr name a lot so the link seems to keep breaking. Replaced it with this link. (http://i.imgur.com/9HPmzxI.jpg)
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This reads like the style of David Simon, one of my favorite journos. Lovely stuff.
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Threw this one together as a little present for Himiko.
Because penguins. :P
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?Brr...?
Sanae lowered herself further beneath the kotatsu, arms wrapped around her torso. She looked out the window at the thick layer of snow that had formed over the length of the mountain. The trees around the shrine fluttered about, their branches tickled by a chilly wind.
She wasn?t a fan of winter. Cold was her kryptonite, turning her from a proud shrine maiden into a shivering mass beneath a blanket. She still made the occasional public appearance, but after that she would always need a week or two to recover. The kotatsu had become her safe haven, the spot that no force in Gensokyo was strong enough to pull her from.
She was just about unrecognisable as she was now. Three layers of clothing engulfed her body, scarves on top of jackets on top of shirts. Half of her face was buried under the fabric, and only a strand of her long green hair poked out from beneath her wooly hat. No-one would have thought of her as the same girl who would brazenly flaunt her armpits in the middle of fall.
It was a relief that her gods had understood her plight. Ladies Kanako and Suwako were out tending to the masses, collecting faith in Sanae?s place. The shrine was deserted, giving her all the privacy she would ever need. Sanae felt warmer at the thought, pledging to redouble her efforts went spring reared its head.
That was still a few months away, though. And until then, nothing was going to get her away from this kotatsu. Absolutely, positively nothing-
Knock, knock. The door. A visitor.
Oh, come on. Sanae smacked her head into the kotatsu, her hat neatly cushioning the impact. She waited a few seconds, hoping that the knocking at the door would miraculously disappear. When the knocking continued, she decided that her powers had gone rusty from lack of use.
Knock, knock, knock.
She didn?t want to answer it. Not only would it mean leaving the kotatsu, it?d give some random youkai the chance to see her at her most human. That would be crippling for the shrine?s reputation - especially with the Hakurei maiden still flying about Gensokyo without a care for minor things like hypothermia.
But she?d been brought up too well for that. Leaving the door unanswered was mildly offsetting in a way she couldn?t put words to. There was a voice in the back of her head nagging at her for being impolite, a voice that grew louder with every knock.
Sanae sighed, bracing herself as she rose to her feet. ?I?m coming.?
The trek to the door felt like a visit to the North Pole. Sanae shuffled along, barely able to walk in the huge fluffy boots she?d snatched from the wardrobe. Little clouds of water vapour formed in the air in front of her face, and her teeth chattered despite her best efforts to hold them still.
If it?s a tengu trying to sell me her newspaper, Yasaka help me.
At last, Sanae made it to the front door, pulling the worn oak handle back and exposing herself to the elements. The three inches of skin she still had showing stung as the winter chill blew through the doorway. She winced, looking out for any sign of her guest.
A black sleeve popped up from the bottom of Sanae?s vision. ?Down here, miss.?
Sanae?s eyes widened, and she craned her neck down. Standing in the doorway was a girl at least a head and a half shorter than she was. Her body was engulfed in a baggy black jacket with a white patch over her stomach. Her hands didn?t even make it out of the sleeves, whipping about as she tipped at her bowler hat.
?Afternoon, miss. I don?t suppose I could ask you for directions? I?ve managed to get a little lost.?
Sanae blinked. The girl?s appearance was surreal enough, but the Moriya shrine was at the very peak of the mountain, with no other landmarks in sight. What would this girl have to be looking for to wind up here?
?Uhh...? Sanae gulped down her surprise, summoning up the cool calmness her duties called for. ?C-Certainly. I haven?t been here for long, but I?ve done a lot of traveling around Gensokyo.?
?Great!? The girl grinned, a light shimmering in her emerald eyes. Her hair was long and black, and Sanae struggled to tell where the hair stopped and the jacket started. ?I?m trying to get to Antartica. Any clue which way I should be heading??
Sanae?s brow furrowed. ?Antartica? As in the South Pole and all that??
?That?s the one. Got a birthday party to attend. I?m only...? She looked at her sleeve as if there was a watch on her wrist. ?Three months late? Going on four, I guess.?
Sanae was lost for words. She?d have stood there in silence if it wasn?t for the cold. Her arm creaked as she beckoned the youkai in.
?You are...pretty far off the mark.?
?Seriously?? The girl pouted. ?Damn, I was sure this was the right direction.? She waddled forward, awkwardly putting one foot in front of the other. As Sanae looked down, she noticed the girl was wearing a pair of sandals shaped like duck?s feet.
?Should you really be wearing those?? Sanae asked as she closed the door. ?They look hard to walk in, and it?s awfully cold out there.?
?What, these?? The girl lifted one leg up, looking down at her shoe with a prideful affection. ?They?re all the rage where I?m from. Besides, cold is something that happens to other people.?
Her confidence was bewildering, but impressive all at once. Sanae felt sweat slipping down her brow, clumsily pulling away her outer jacket. Strange - the house was a lot warmer than it had been five minutes ago. Maybe the heating was finally kicking in.
?Okay, I?m not sure how to tell you this,? Sanae said, retreating beneath the kotatsu again. ?You?re, uh...sorry, I never caught your name.?
?Toriyuki.? The girl tipped her hat again. ?Penguin youkai, at your service.?
Sanae raised an eyebrow. That explained the destination, at least. ?Well, Toriyuki, you?re in Gensokyo now. It?s sort of its own pocket dimension, split off from the rest of the world.?
?Gensokyo? Are you serious?? Toriyuki rubbed her temples. ?I was sure I followed those instructions right. Take a left at Albuquerque, then walk straight for about a thousand miles...man, this is going to be awkward.?
She didn?t seem to have grasped the concept that she was stuck here. Sanae felt a flame forming in her chest, pulling away another layer of clothing. As she pulled the hat away, she had finally returned to the shrine maiden garb people expected from her.
?Um, miss Toriyuki...? Sanae wasn?t sure if it was embarrassment, but she felt bizarrely warm even without her extra layers. Maybe she?d managed to catch a fever or something. ?Gensokyo isn?t really a place you leave.?
The penguin tilted her head. ?I don?t follow. If there?s a way in, there?s a way out, right??
?Not exactly. If you got in, it was because the youkai in charge wanted you here - and if she wants you to leave, she?ll be the one finding you.? Sanae melted down under the kotatsu, feeling the crispy heat engulf her. It had never felt this good before, even on the best days. What was going on?
?Oh. Huh.? Toriyuki put a sleeve to her chin. ?So what?s the best way to get kicked out??
?By Gensokyo?s standards?? Sanae shrugged. ?You?d have to start a war or burn down half the country. Can you do that??
When the penguin genuinely stopped to consider the point, Sanae admitted she felt a little intimidated. Still, in spite of her aura of confidence, Toriyuki didn?t look powerful enough to do any lasting damage to the big names of Gensokyo.
?Well, I could ruin winter for everyone. Would that work??
?Huh?? Now it was Sanae?s turn to look confused. ?How do you plan to do that??
Toriyuki grinned. ?Watch and learn.? She rose to her feet, standing at her full height of four feet. She stretched her arms out, sleeves still hanging limp as she closed her eyes in focus.
There was a faint humming as the white patch on her jacket darkened, shining a brilliant red. Sanae could feel the heat wafting through the air, warmer than Gensokyo?s fiercest summer. Now she knew how she?d become so warm in the last few minutes - it was Toriyuki?s power, warming up the room even when she wasn?t trying.
?Not bad, huh?? The penguin smiled, lowering her arms as her jacket faded back to white. ?I?m thinking I start up here and slide all the way down the mountain. I?ll bring down all sorts of slush and make sure no-one ever gets to build a snowman-?
Her monologue was interrupted by Sanae jumping up and wrapping her arms around her.
?H-Hey! What are you-?
Sanae was too entranced to listen. Toriyuki?s jacket felt like it had been freshly ironed, a heat that carried through her and warmed her heart. She forgot it was winter, arms wrapped around the penguin like a vice, refusing to let go.
?Seriously, let go!? The little penguin flapped about, blushing as she struggled against the shrine maiden. ?You?re gonna crease the fabric!?
Sanae paid her no mind, squeezing her with all her might. The pleasant heat had locked her in a trance, smiling like an idiot as the world ceased to be around her. She was still giggling to herself when her gods slipped through the wall, stepping in after a long day?s work.
?Sanae, we?re ho-? Kanako stopped halfway through her sentence as she saw her shrine maiden locked in embrace. ?Sanae, who?s this? And what happened to your jacket??
Toriyuki looked up at the gods with an almost despairing expression. ?Oh, thank goodness. You?ve got to help me. This girl?s a maniac, and I?m always three months late for my appointment-?
?Can we keep her?? Sanae asked.
Toriyuki flinched. ?Eeeh?!?
Kanako scratched at her head, while Suwako giggled lightly to herself. The frog goddess was just about at Toriyuki?s height, and took the chance to look the penguin in the eye.
?Hm, an interesting specimen.? She smiled, looking up to Sanae again. ?You know we?re strict about pets in this house, right? We?re still trying to make up for the time you tried to take in a wolf tengu as a dog.?
?I?ll take care of her really really well, okay?? Sanae pouted, eyes welling up for maximum persuasion. ?And it?s just until winter ends. I?ll let her go when the weather isn?t so terrible.?
?Do I get a say in this?!? Toriyuki yelled.
?With Sanae?? Kanako sighed and rubbed at her temples. ?Not really. Unless you?re willing to risk the anger of both her gods, that is.?
Toriyuki?s neck jerked around - first to Sanae, then to Suwako, then to Kanako, and back to Sanae. She flailed about more, the bowler hat finally falling off her head onto the floor.
?Muuu...? The penguin grumbled, going limp in defeat. ?Maybe I can still make it for next year...?
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Penguin shaped space-heater!
...or just a Penguin youkai, trololol
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WARNING! Not quite NSFW but still questionable enough that I had to double check posting it was acceptable.
Also diverTouhous, but that should be a given for me by now.
Featuring some complimentary Stuffman (http://stuffman.tumblr.com) art as well!
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The worst feeling a mathematician can experience is the feeling of being out of their depth.
Ran Yakumo stared blankly at the papers she?d left strewn over her desk. Each page was full to the brim with her working, numbers coming together in a demented shorthand only she fully understood. It was the culmination of hours of theorising and calculation.
And all of it was absolutely worthless.
?Goddammit!?
Her frustrations burst out at once, and she brought her arm sweeping along the length of the desk. The papers went flying in every direction, though she still possessed enough self restraint to keep the inkwell from falling over. She placed her head on the wooden surface, gripping at her temples and mumbling to herself.
She couldn?t think straight. Her brain felt like it was swirling around in a sea of fog, slowly throttling her ability to think coherently. She knew the cause, of course - it was something that happened to her every year, something that led to her locking herself away in her room until the feeling passed. But never in all her years had the feeling been quite this intense.
Deep breaths, Ran. Calm down.
The fox squeezed her eyes shut, whispering the mantras to an old meditation. Gradually the heat passed out of her body, dousing the fire in her veins. She sat up again as she filled her lungs with cool, crisp air.
?Right. That approach didn?t work.? She raised a hand, the fallen papers floating pack onto the desk at her command. With another swing of her wrist the words written on them vanished, the ink rising off the paper and returning to the inkwell. ?That just means I have to try something else.?
She picked up her quill, dipping it into the well before scribbling down a new set of equations to solve. Her progress was slow at first, but her momentum grew with each line, the trained mind of a mathematician overriding everything else. It was a simple pleasure, and one she rarely had a chance to enjoy. In that way, this affliction had almost been a blessing in disguise.
She was so caught up in her work that she almost missed the leaf floating through her window, blown in by a wind that didn?t exist. It flew straight towards the inkwell, with enough speed that it easily would have knocked it over.
Ran caught the leaf between two of her fingers without looking up. ?Nice try, Mamizou. But I?m not that careless.?
The leaf flapped about in her grip in an attempt to free itself. After a few seconds without success it vanished in a puff of smoke, and Ran found that there was now a tanuki sitting on her desk.
?You?re no fun, y?know that?? Mamizou pouted, folding her arms like a five year old. ?Locking yourself up to play around with your numbers. Surely there?s better things you can do with your day.?
Ran sighed. Mamizou was a relatively new addition to Gensokyo?s rogues? gallery, but she?d quickly made her presence known. In particular, when she wasn?t busy elsewhere, she seemed to take a perverse pleasure in bothering Ran in every way possible. Perhaps it was just a natural relationship between a fox and a tanuki. Or maybe it was-no, she didn?t want to consider that alternative.
?As it happens, I think experimenting with theoretical mathematics is a perfectly good way to spend my day.? Ran straightened her hat, working very hard not to meet the tanuki?s glance. ?Though I can understand if a plebeian like you finds that concept difficult to grasp.?
?Plebeian?? Mamizou pulled back, face going white from offense. ?I?ll have you know I was inventing compound interest back when you were still suckling at your mother?s breast. Maybe I don?t know all your fancy theorems, but I know enough to make a killing in the world of finance.?
She pulled out a notebook, fluttering through the pages to show several loans she?d given to Gensokyo?s residents and the profit she?d made from each. Both sides had more zeroes on them than seemed necessary. ?See here?? Mamizou said, puffing up her chest. ?This is what I call practical knowledge. I use what I know to make money hand over fist. All you do is write down stuff that nobody else is ever gonna understand.?
Ran growled, her tails bristling behind her. Not only was Mamizou bothering her, the tanuki saw fit to lecture her as well. She shoved forward to push Mamizou off the desk, but rather than falling to the floor Mamizou simply stayed suspended in the air.
?Is privacy a foreign concept to you?? the fox muttered, one finger tapping incessantly at the desk. ?At least bother me when I?ve got the time to spare.?
Mamizou tilted her head, her tail bobbing around behind her. ?So you want me to make an appointment, then??
?Well, that?s not what I meant, but-?
?Sure! That sounds like fun.? The tanuki grabbed the quill off of Ran?s desk and scribbled on a blank page of her notebook. ?How does tomorrow sound? High noon at the edge of the Misty Lake.?
Ran raised a hand to object. ?I didn?t-?
?Excellent!? Mamizou through the quill back into the well with immaculate aim. She tipped forward the leaf on her head as if it was a hat. ?Be punctual, alright? I?ve got a surprise in store for you, but there?s no point if you show up late.?
Before Ran could offer an objection, the tanuki had already disappeared. She watched as the leaf fluttered out of the window again, turning into a dot in her vision within seconds. She watched its movements, following it until even her well-trained eyes could make out no glimpse of it.
Moments later, she slammed the window shut.
?Foolish tanuki.? Ran pursed her lips, sinking a few inches lower in her chair. ?Thinks she can order me around. Me! Ran Yakumo, subordinate to Yukari Yakumo herself! It?d be hilarious if it wasn?t so pathetic.?
She said everything she could to motivate herself, ignoring the heat that had rushed to her face. Her affliction was already hard enough to control, but being in the tanuki?s presence made its effects even more pronounced. She had theories as to why, but stopped herself from putting them into words for fear they might be right.
?Besides, her whole plan banks on me going along with what she says.? Ran laughed to herself, tails bouncing with every giggle. ?Well, she?s got another thing coming. There?s no way I?m heading out for that appointment. Never in a million years!?
-----
Twenty four hours later, Ran felt a queer terror shaking at her bones.
What the hell am I doing here?
The Misty Lake spread out in front of her, its water remarkably clear in spite of the name. Above her, the sun was minutes away from reaching its peak. Luckily there was little in the way of witnesses, other than a few fairies who probably wouldn?t have noticed her anyway.
She wiped a layer of sweat from her forehead. She?d had to rush to make sure she arrived on time, just as Mamizou had asked for her. At no point had anything rational taken part in her thought processes. In fact, it had been the opposite - for the entire journey her brain had been screaming at her to turn around and keep herself locked up at home.
So why was she here? There was nothing for her to gain from this. She was playing right into Mamizou?s plan, whatever that happened to be. Nothing was keeping her here. In fact, nothing was stopping her from turning on her heels and going home right now. There was still enough time to salvage today and spend the rest of the evening plugging away at the Riemann hypothesis.
But it?s a bit of a waste to come all this way for nothing. Ran nodded to herself, finding an answer that her rational thoughts could accept. I?ll wait for her to arrive, then make a polite excuse and leave. That should do it.
Satisfied with her course of action, Ran sat at the edge of the lake, turning her back to the water and looking into the surrounding forest. This had to be the place, she thought to herself. The other side of the lake was home to the Scarlet Devil Mansion, and even Mamizou wasn?t foolhardy enough to venture into those parts.
The fox looked about, twiddling her thumbs. No sign of the tanuki. Maybe the whole thing had been a trick to stand Ran up. That sounded like a very Mamizou thing to do, now that she thought about it. After a few minutes, Ran decided she?d had enough and rose to her feet again.
With perfect dramatic timing, the waters behind her shuddered.
?Kyaa?!?
Ran turned around just in time to get sprayed in the face with lake water. Her robes were soaked through, the fabric clinging to her body unpleasantly. She growled in the direction of her attacker, ready to claw them down in retribution.
She stopped mid-swing as she got a good view of the culprit.
?Shuuuu~??
Mamizou stood tall in the water, a playful grin etched on her face. She wiped a few water droplets from her glasses, posing in a dark brown suit that clung closely to her body. A metal tank was strapped to her back, attached to a plastic mouthpiece held between her lips. With each rise and fall of her chest the contraption let out a loud, breathy hiss.
?What the...-? Ran lowered her arm, more out of confusion than a desire to stand down. ?Mamizou, what are you wearing??
The tanuki offered Ran a salute before spitting out her mouthpiece. ?You like it? It?s called a wetsuit. You wear it when you?re gonna get, well, wet.?
She ran a hand down her side, and Ran found herself unconsciously following her finger. The outfit clung to her like a second skin, leaving nothing to Ran?s imagination. She saw Mamizou?s every curve, her well-formed chest and her plump behind-
Agh! Ran shook herself out of her trance, covering her eyes with one hand. There was never a good time to be caught ogling another woman, but this moment happened to be especially inappropriate. She recovered admirably, clearing her throat and putting on an expression of bored nonchalance. Her awkward glance had lasted only a moment - too short for Mamizou to notice, surely.
?Oh?? Mamizou stepped forward - or rather, she waddled. A pair of plastic flippers were strapped to her feet, presumably to improve her mobility in the water. ?That wasn?t the response I?d expected from you.?
?And what were you looking for?? Ran asked, with a smidgeon of curiosity.
?A clever quip, if I?m honest.? Mamizou shrugged. ?Something about how I looked like a drowned rat, I was going to wager.?
?I?ll keep that in mind for next time.? Ran looked down at her soaked robes, the fabric weighing her down so much she struggled to move in it. ?Now is there anything else you wanted from me, or is this my cue to start trudging on home??
?As it happens, I had something I wanted to show you.? Mamizou pointed out into the depths of the lake. ?But we?re both gonna have to do a little swimming to get there.?
Ran raised an eyebrow. ?So you get all the fancy equipment, and I have to swim in my undergarments??
?Of course not, silly.? Mamizou stuck her tongue out, pointing to a nearby bush. ?There?s another set of gear hidden over there. All tailored to your size, of course.?
?How do you know my-? Ran got halfway through the question before deciding the answer wasn?t worth knowing. ?Never mind. I assume I don?t have a choice in the matter??
Now it was Mamizou?s turn to eye up the fox youkai. ?You can leave if you want. But I?m pretty sure that outfit?s gonna need a few hours to dry out. And you may as well find something else to do in the meantime, right??
Ran sighed. Of course Mamizou had considered that option. The tanuki knew her well, almost disturbingly so. She raised her hands in defeat, trudging towards the bush to hide herself.
?For the record,? she said, her eyes glowering with scorn. ?If I catch you peeking in on me, I?ll make you wish you?d never been born.?
?Oh, please,? Mamizou answered with a smirk. ?Why would I ever spy on you in a way you?d be able to notice??
That did little to make Ran feel more comfortable, but she tried her best to brush it off. She walked into the foliage, making sure she was properly hidden from sight before beginning to undress. Losing the water-logged clothes was a relief, but she didn?t feel comfortable staying undressed for long.
Sure enough, a similar set of diving gear had been hidden among the roots of the branch. The main difference was the colour; where Mamizou?s wetsuit was a dark brown, Ran?s was instead a shade of deepest black. There was also a plastic mask designed to go over her eyes - probably what she had to use in place of Mamizou?s glasses.
Thankfully, most of the equipment was self explanatory. Within a few minutes she had nothing but the tank to contend with. Though it took her a while to figure out where all the straps were supposed to go, she eventually managed to emerge from the bush with all her equipment in check. She took a quick breath from the tank as a test, letting out the same hissy breaths that Mamizou had demonstrated earlier.
?Oh my~? Mamizou giggled childishly, a very obvious blush rising to her face. ?You look even better in that outfit than I?d imagined. If only I?d brought a camera with me...?
?Don?t even joke about it,? Ran said with a growl. ?I wouldn?t let anyone see me dressed like this.?
?So you mean I?m the only one you?ll dress up for?? Mamizou smiled. ?Aww, I always knew you cared, Ran~?
Ran grunted. She?d walked right into that one. The longer she dallied, the better the odds of her embarrassing herself again. She shrugged the thought off, taking her first awkward steps into the water.
?Let?s just go,? she said, biting down on her mouthpiece before she could say anything else that could be used against her. The sooner Mamizou showed her whatever was so impressive, the better.
?Okie dokie,? Mamizou said, taking Ran?s hand and leading her along. She gave the fox a playful wink when they were up to their shoulders in the water. ?Stick close to me, alright??
Ran nodded begrudgingly, squeezing at Mamizou?s hand as they fell beneath the surface. I just know I?m going to regret this...
-----
At first Ran had to overcome the feeling of clunkiness. (http://i.imgur.com/Oh8lE2n.jpg) Her kicks were sloppy and graceless, giving her almost nothing in the way of velocity. She held her breath for as long as she could, trying not to rely on the tank until she had no other choice. Luckily the contraption worked as advertised, as with every breath she let out a steady stream of bubbles trickled from her mouthpiece.
In comparison, Mamizou seemed much more comfortable in the water, pulling the struggling Ran along behind her. Ran paid close attention to the form behind her swimming, her flippers cutting elegantly through the water. The fox did her best to emulate that posture, and while it wasn?t a perfect copy it was enough to let her keep up with the tanuki.
After a few minutes, Ran was comfortable enough that she could match Mamizou?s pace without much effort. Now she had her a chance to focus on her surroundings instead. The visibility beneath the water was amazingly clear, even before taking the mask into account. She reached out at a passing school of fish, tickling at their scales as they swam by. A smile rose to her face unbidded, a small giggle gurgling out from her lips.
?Hrrrmbbl~?? Mamizou looked back at her, gurgling with a sly grin as her tail bounced about in Ran?s face. The fox blushed again, refusing to meet the tanuki?s glance. For a moment it had looked suspiciously like she was enjoying herself, and that was a victory she wouldn?t allow Mamizou to have.
It was only when Mamizou looked away again that Ran attempted to relax. Her breaths were faster and sharper than they should have been, and she put a hand to her chest to quell her racing heart. This was the feeling she?d locked herself away to conceal, the feeling that had tricked her into humouring Mamizou?s ?appointment?. She knew exactly what the source was - and from the glint in Mamizou?s eyes, the tanuki had figured it out as well.
No. She knew from the beginning. Ran looked up at Mamizou again with a frown. That?s why she dressed up for me like that. She knew I wouldn?t be able to turn her down...and now I?ve walked right into her trap. She grabbed at her temples. Dammit, why can?t I think with my head rather than my hormones?
She was so caught up in berating herself that she barely noticed the path Mamizou was leading her through. The pair passed through caverns built into the rock, and at one point a mermaid swam by, eying the two newcomers with some confusion. By the time Ran?s attention had returned, Mamizou was already leading her up through an air pocket, out into an underwater cavern.
?Puhaaa~? Mamizou took in a long deep breath as she spat out her mouthpiece. ?Man, there?s nothing quite like fresh air, is there??
Ran weakly nodded in response, pulling off her mask and mouthpiece in rapid succession. Her eyes lazily turned to the walls, getting a grip of her surroundings. It didn?t take long for the sight to strike her dumb.
?Wow. Just...? Ran blinked. ?Wow.?
Structurally, it was just an ordinary cave, similar to any other. But the walls had been decorated with almost impossible brilliance, icy spirals forming beautiful patterns across every inch of the surface. It was a perfect fractal design, every edge of the design serving as the root for a smaller version of itself.
?Not bad, is it?? Mamizou pulled herself out of the water onto dry land, unclipping the tank and laying it on the floor. Clearly she wasn?t planning to get back into the water any time soon. ?Apparently it?s the work of a local ice fairy. She?s since moved on to another hideout, but she left this little masterpiece behind.?
Ran nodded along again, taking off her tank and placing it on the ground beside Mamizou?s. Neither of them bothered to take off their flippers, walking slowly and carefully across the uneven earth.
?It?s a real sight,? Mamizou said to herself, hands on her hips as she puffed her chest out with pride. ?I was quite happy with myself after I found it. Figured it was worth sharing with someone, and the folks in the temple weren?t interested, so-?
?Enough of the charade,? Ran said with a sigh. ?I know why you called me out here.?
Mamizou stopped in place, biting her lip for a moment, before turning around with a sigh. Droplets of water still clung to her suit, the fabric fitting her even tighter than before.
?I don?t get why you hide it,? the tanuki said at last, scratching behind one of her ears. ?Being in heat, I mean.?
Ran shuddered. Even the phrase was enough to make her feel uncomfortable. She rubbed at her forearm, her fox ears drooping down as far as they would go.
?It feels...dirty,? she said, practically spitting the words out. ?I?m one of the strongest magicians in Gensokyo. I should be above carnal desires like that.?
?Now that?s just being stubborn.? Mamizou frowned, tutting as she waved a finger about. ?You still have to eat, drink and, uh, answer the call of nature. Sex shouldn?t be any less natural than any of those.?
?I know, it?s just...? Ran found herself blushing harder still, twiddling anxiously at her thumbs. ?I?ve never found somebody that I?d feel comfortable giving myself to. And I don?t want to rush into anything and-?
?Wait.? Mamizou?s eyes widened as she wiped her glasses clean. ?Are you saying you?re a virgin??
Now Ran was turning redder than a beetroot. ?Have you ever seen a male fox in heat? They?re lusty and abusive and-? She froze. ?Wait, why am I telling you this? You pulled me all the way out of here just so I?d embarrass myself and-?
Before she could finish, Mamizou swooped forward and kissed her on the lips.
?Mpphnn!?? Ran flailed about at first, brain ready to explode in response to the assault. But before she knew it she was sinking into Mamizou?s embrace, the tanuki?s grip firm but comfortable. She began to lean forward into the kiss, her tongue pushing forward to press against Mamizou?s.
After a few seconds, Mamizou pulled away and smiled. ?Ran, be honest with me. You like me, right??
The sheer upfrontness of the question left Ran stunned for a moment. She forced herself to remain sane, to keep her hormones from overcoming her rational thought. Only when she felt sufficiently calm did she attempt to reply.
?Well, you?re a nuisance,? she said. ?You refuse to leave me alone, and trouble follows behind wherever you go. You?ve made it your personal goal to frustrate me every chance you get, and ever since you arrived in Gensokyo I haven?t had a moment?s peace.?
She smiled. ?But my life?s been a lot more interesting with you around. And it?s been a long time since I had another trickster to test myself against.? She put a hand on Mamizou?s side. ?That and, well, you?re pretty attractive for a tanuki.?
Mamizou chuckled, reaching back to brush at Ran?s tails. ?And you don?t like being locked away in your room, right? No matter how much you love your math, I?ll bet you wish you had a choice in the matter.?
Ran gasped slightly at Mamizou?s touch before nodding again. ?I think I know what you?re going to suggest.?
The tanuki stuck her tongue out. ?Aww, and here I thought it was going to be a surprise~.? Her hand dropped a little lower, grabbing firmly at Ran?s backside. ?That is, if you?re okay with it. I don?t wanna force you into something you don?t want.?
For a moment, the playful smirk fell away from Mamizou?s face, giving way to a look of genuine concern. Ran smiled. Perhaps the tanuki had a conscience after all. ?Do I have your word that no-one will find out about this??
?Why did you think I brought you out here?? Mamizou?s bright smile returned. ?This can be our little hiding place. And I swear on my honour as a tanuki that I won?t speak a word about anything that happens within these four walls.?
Ran felt a weight lift from her heart. She?d found a way to relieve herself of this burden, and nobody had to know about it - well, she knew one person who?d be watching in, but there was nothing she could do about that. She leaned forward into Mamizou, resting her chin on the tanuki?s chest.
?You understand my honour forbids me from thanking you, I assume.?
?Of course, of course.? Mamizou slowly lowered Ran onto the floor, leaning above her as the tanuki began to join in with the panting. ?But don?t worry about that. I?ll make sure to get my share of fun out of this as well.?
She hung close, and Ran felt her whole body catching alight. This was an experience she?d held back for centuries, and now all that pent up excitement was going to be let out at once.
?Come now, Ran,? Mamizou said, with a confidence that came with centuries of experience. ?Let me show you just what I can do with this tail of mine...?
-----
?Oh, my. How unabashedly lewd.?
Yukari giggled to herself as she watched the scene play out from the warmth and comfort of her own home. Both participants were too caught up in the moment to notice a small violet gap hanging above them, occasionally shuffling about to make sure she had a good angle.
?It?s about time, though,? the youkai said to herself, nodding as she folded her fan in one hand. ?Ran?s been a pure flower for far too long. Maybe an experience like this will help her to get out more.?
She watched the two youkai embrace with a mixture of curiosity and surprise. The tanuki certainly seemed to know what she was doing. Clearly, Ran wasn?t her first partner - maybe not even her hundredth. Both of them were going at it with immense amounts of energy - it could take them hours to finish at this rate.
?Nyah?? A voice rose up from the hallway as Chen poked her head in. ?Miss Yukari, what are you watching??
?Oh, Chen.? Yukari beckoned the shikigami over with a finger. ?I?m indulging in a little bit of voyeurism, if you must know.?
Chen walked forwards, puzzled at first. As she came closer, and the figures in front of her became more distinct, her mouth opened to form a tiny O.
?Eeeeh?? Her tails swished about behind her. ?What are they doing with each other??
Yukari smirked. ?Well, you see, Chen, when two people love each other very much-?
?I know what sex is,? Chen said before Yukari could finish. ?I?m not THAT young, miss Yukari.? She looked back towards the screen. ?But why is miss Ran doing it with the tanuki lady? I thought they hated each other.?
Yukari nodded. She?d thought the same herself at first. But plenty of time among the living had taught her that the emotions of love and hatred weren?t that far apart. Both of them involved one person taking up every waking thought - the only difference was if you wanted to cuddle them or kill them. And sometimes, even that much wasn?t clear.
She wondered to herself if the relationship would last. Maybe they?d be back to yelling at each other in a few days time. Or maybe - just maybe - that was what made them so appealing to each other.
Not that any of it mattered to her right now. She was going to enjoy this little exhibition while it lasted.
?Take a seat, Chen,? she said, patting at the pillow beside her. ?You just might learn something from this.?
-
Listen. You hear that?
That's the sound of meta.
-----
?Hear ye, hear ye!? Sango yelled, smacking her palm against a tree trunk for emphasis. ?I hereby call the first meeting of the Gensokyo Interracial Literature Reciprocation Committee to order!?
The sole member of the audience rolled her eyes. ?You could just call it a story swap, you know.?
?Quiet, Jozu,? Sango said. ?Big words make it sound more impressive.?
?Well, you sure did a great job calling in the masses, didn?t you?? Jozu motioned out across the Crystal Waters, at the various youkai and fairies minding their own business. Most of them seemed to be making a deliberate effort to keep their distance from the coast where Sango and Jozu were holding their meeting.
?It?s our first event,? Sango said with a shrug. ?These things always start slow.?
?Riiiight.? Jozu fidgeted with her breathing device, unable to meet the dolphin?s glance face-on. ?What brought this on, anyway? I never pegged you as the writing type.?
Sango put a finger on her chin. It had been one of those momentary impulses that didn?t have an obvious source. Generally that meant it was somehow Koishi?s fault, but she wasn?t confident enough of that to pin the blame.
?I?m just trying something new, I guess. Never really done a lot of writing.? Sango?s eyes widened. ?Honestly, I?m more surprised that you were up for taking part.?
?Yeah, well.? Jozu blushed slightly, scratching harder at her neck. ?I?ve actually done this a couple of times before. Never shared it with anyone, but I guess now is a good time to start.?
Sango nodded. ?Good to hear.? She puffed out her chest. ?Though I think I?m pretty talented myself, so don?t get too overwhelmed by what I?m about to show you-?
?Just gimme the story already.?
?Alright, fine.? Sango pouted, handing over a few sheets of paper. ?Do you enjoy cutting me off every chance you get??
Jozu smirked. ?Maybe.? She pulled out her own work, written on a few slices of well-pressed seaweed. Sango had no idea how Jozu managed to write underwater, but the answer probably wasn?t much more complex than ?magic?.
?OK, then, let?s see what we?re working with...? Sango gave the story a quick look-over to start with. Jozu did the same, examining Sango?s writing from a distance before she started to nitpick.
In the space of a minute, the blood flushed from the dolphin?s face.
?Uhhh...?
She scratched at her head, biting her lip. What she was reading was...well. At least the spelling was consistent, and the grammar only faltered once or twice. But as for the story itself, calling it ?mediocre? may have been too much of a compliment. ?Awful? was probably closer to the truth.
I hope she?s not feeling awkward, the dolphin thought to herself. She looked up when Jozu seemed distracted, trying to gauge her partner?s reaction.
Instead, she saw Jozu grimacing with an expression very similar to her own.
Uh-oh. Sango gulped. I don?t think I?m going to like what she has to say.
It was a few minutes before either of them made an attempt to comment. Sango pretended to take longer reading than she actually needed, looking for any excuse not to be the first one to break the silence. Unfortunately Jozu had the exact same idea, and the awkward atmosphere between the two just grew harsher with each passing moment.
Eventually Sango decided to take action. ?You go first.?
Jozu twitched. ?You sure? I mean, you said before that you were a beginner, so I don?t want to scare you off.?
?It?s my committee, and I say you go first.? Sango folded her arms. ?Those are the rules.?
The shark tensed visibly, then finally sighed in resignation. ?OK, not going to lie. This is going to be brutal.?
?I guessed as much.? Sango tapped anxiously at her arm. ?Just get it over with.?
Jozu looked down at the papers in her hands, with the look of a doctor bearing bad news. ?Well, the first thing is the characters. They feel a bit...familiar.?
?Um, really?? Sango looked away. ?I don?t know what you mean-?
?You called then Ognas and Uzoj.? Jozu frowned. ?A dolphin and a shark. Doesn?t take a genius to figure out who you?re talking about.?
?Oh, that?s what you?re getting at.? Sango laughed awkwardly. ?Sorry. Coming up with new characters is difficult, so I try to just write what I know.?
Jozu sighed, visibly struggling to find the right words. ?Normally, I?d be fine with that. But these two characters...? Now it was the shark?s turn to blush. ?You?re writing about them as, uh, partners. Of a romantic nature.?
Sango tilted her head. ?What?re you getting at? They?re not us, Jozu. Just characters that look kind of similar, that?s all.?
Jozu?s grip tightened on the paper. ?Well, does it have to be so...graphic? I mean, you never shut up about how pretty they are. You wax poetic about things like her ?heavenly sighs? and how she has ?the skin of a goddess?. It?s all so...? Jozu tickled at her breather. ?Showy-offy.?
The dolphin raised an eyebrow. ?But I thought using pretty words like that was what good writers did??
?I dunno who taught you that, but they were wrong.? Jozu?s eyes glazed over as she tried to skim through the story again. ?Honestly, half the effort that goes into reading this thing is deciphering what you?re trying to say.?
Sango looked for a defense, but she knew that Jozu had a point. She sighed, long and hard, finally conceding the argument. ?OK, I get it. I?ll wind down on the fanciness next time. Anything else you want to crush my spirits with??
?Not particularly.? Jozu put down her copy of Sango?s story, rolling her eyes as she prepared for the barrage to follow. ?I?m guessing you?re not very happy with what I?ve written, either.?
?Well, it?s...? The dolphin sucked in a breath. ?It?s not terrible, but it?s just very bland. A lot of it is just ?he did this, he said that?. There?s no real flow to the writing, and it reads like some sort of instruction manual.?
The shark pinched at her nose. ?Yeah, I admit that I sort of rushed most of the story. I wanted to get to the part with the-?
?The muscles, yes. I was getting to that.? Sango pulled at her collar. ?You...you like well-sculpted men, I assume.?
?You don?t?? Jozu flexed. ?There?s just a real passion to seeing men get together like that. It?s a forbidden love, you know what I?m saying??
No. No, I don?t. Sango?s throat felt dry. She hadn?t thought of Jozu as a fan of...this sort of fiction. Maybe she would talk the shark into writing something different next time; otherwise, this committee could earn itself an unpleasant reputation.
?Anyway,? she said, forcing herself to change the subject. ?The writing gets better when you get to the...? Sango felt her cheeks heat up. ?The fornication, but there?s a lot going on here that doesn?t make sense. I mean, what the heck is an twelve-pack??
?I thought that was obvious,? Jozu said with a frown. ?It?s like a six-pack, but twice as good.?
?Is that even possible?? Sango said, scratching at her head.
?I dunno, but I get shivers thinking about it.? Jozu stared off into the distance, a warm grin stuck to her face. ?Ooh, those pecs...?
Sango hesitated, waiting for the shark?s trance to subside before she spoke again. ?Well, whatever it is, you spend way too long talking about it. I just checked, and you spent a page and a half talking about one guy?s biceps.?
?That?s still too much?? Jozu pouted. ?Man, I thought cutting that segment in half would be enough.?
?No. It really wasn?t.? Sango grimaced slightly. ?I get that you really like this sort of thing, but it?s really distracting to someone who doesn?t share your interests. It feels like the whole story exists just to let you fantasise.?
Jozu let out a long, deep breath. ?Point taken. This is the first time I?ve let anyone else read my work, so...yeah.?
Silence fell over the two youkai. They looked towards each other, then their stories, then back to each other again. Ultimately it was Sango who put words to the thought lingering in both their minds.
?We?re not very good at this, are we??
Jozu shook her head. ?Not really.?
Sango sighed. Honestly she?d been expecting a result like this - she could hardly expect to be a professional writer without any sort of experience. But the criticism still stung nonetheless.
?OK, so I think we?ve both got some lessons to take from this,? she said, trying to accentuate the positives. ?I need to be a bit more original with my characters, and tone down on showing off my vocabulary.?
Jozu nodded. ?And I need to take into account the things that I like reading about might not be the things people want to read.?
?Sounds about right.? Sango took a deep breath of fresh air, feeling rejuvenated. ?Anyway, unless anything else comes up, I?d say this is the end of-?
?Heeeeeeeeey!?
A voice from overhead pulled away Sango?s attention. Looking up, she saw a red blur charging through the sky, headed straight for her like a human sized bullet. It pulled away at the last moment, and Sango felt the wind brush past her face.
?Hey there is this the-? The newcomer didn?t have time to finish her sentence before momentum ran its natural course, and she slammed headfirst into the ground. A cloud of dust blew up around the point of impact, and Sango teetered backwards to keep her distance.
Jozu stared at the crater with a bizarre lack of surprise. ?Afternoon, Briar.?
As the dust cleared, Sango could make out the form of a fairy standing in its midst. Mud and dirt trailed along her long read dress, and there were leaves caught in her messy pink hair, but she still stood tall and proud in spite of it. Her usual dive tank was nowhere to be seen, but she still wore the shoe-like flippers that had practically become her trademark.
?Briar Rose, reporting for duty!? The fairy saluted towards the two youkai, both of whom were well over a head taller than her. ?This is where I?m supposed to go for the Intraracist Litter-ture thing, right??
Sango?s jaw hung open without her intending it. ?It?s, uh, the Interracial Literature Reciprocation Committee.? Her eyes widened as she finally recognised the figure in front of her. ?Wait, aren?t you the fairy that tried to steal my magic snorkel a few months ago??
?Huh?? Briar put a hand on her chin, having to think the point over for a few seconds before she responded. ?Oh, yeah, that did happen, didn?t it? Well, you got it back now, so it?s all water under the bridge.?
Sango was unable to put words to the sheer bewilderment she was experiencing. That sort of ?no-one got hurt, so it?s fine? ideology could only have come from a fairy - well, maybe Koishi too, but Koishi was her own category of ?unusual?.
?Jozu, we?re not going to let her take part, are we?? Sango looked back at the shark with a frown. ?I?m not sure I can feel comfortable around someone who tried to rob me.?
?Eh, she?s pretty harmless when it comes down to it.? Jozu shrugged. ?Besides, what sort of writing do you think she?s managed to come up with??
The idea was enough to turn all of Sango?s preconceptions on their head. A fairy - a creature known for having the attention span of a goldfish while only being marginally smarter - was trying to write a story.
She felt a sudden surge of confidence. As bad as her writing had been, there was no way it could be worse than what Briar had produced.
?Alright, then,? she said, nodding as she turned back to the fairy. ?Let?s take a look at what you?ve got.?
Briar wore a smug grin. ?If you insist. Try not to get too jealous, okay?? She pulled out a set of papers, even going to the extent of handing out multiple copies of her story. The paper itself was ragged, and the pages came in no obvious order, but after some sorting Sango managed to find the proper order to read them in.
What she happened upon was unbelievable.
?This is...? Sango cupped one hand around her mouth. ?It?s beautiful.?
Jozu nodded, looking over her own copy. ?It?s like I?m watching a shipwreck in progress. It?s horrifying, but I can?t look away.?
Sango could only watch the story play out. The spelling was atrocious, the plot was nonexistent, and the characters were cardboard cutouts who came back from the dead without any sort of explanation. It was undoubtedly the worst story Sango had ever found herself reading.
And yet it was so terrible that it had an uncanny charm to it. It read as the crazed ramblings of a fairy high on sugar - which, honestly, it probably was - but Sango found herself hooked on every page. Briar had clearly put her heart into this piece, and the dolphin always found herself wondering what insane plot twist would come next.
?So what do you think?? Briar looked over Sango?s shoulder, fluttering in the air behind her. ?I wasn?t sure if the dinosaurs had enough lasers to be believable. I tried to get River to give me some pictures to go with it, but she just laughed when I tried to show her the story.?
Sango spent a good minute or two looking for a way to word her feelings. All she could manage was reaching around to give the fairy a gentle pat on the back.
?Never change,? she said. ?Just...keep doing what you?re doing.?
?I agree,? Jozu said, giving Briar a thumbs-up. ?If you make more stories like this, I?ll read every single word.?
Briar took their words entirely at face value. ?Yes, well. Here?s hoping I haven?t disheartened you two with my awesome talents.? She puffed out her chest, honestly thinking the youkai were calling her the greatest artist of her generation.
Which she was. Sort of. In her own special way.
We should do this again some time, Sango thought to herself. This committee just got a lot more interesting...
-
After reading the Kappa's interview with Mystia, I was wondering if you would do a Mystia meets Jozu story...
-
So a few days ago I got my first Normal 1CC for Ten Desires at 4 in the morning, in an amazing fight I'll never be able to replicate. As a consequence I'm ever so slightly obsessed with Miko, and when I get obsessed with characters I insist on adding them to my little OC-canon. So here you go. :P
-----
If Miko had learned anything in her travels, it was never to trust appearances. In politics, a beautiful face was often a cover for a cruel and wicked exterior. You had to be suspicious of the folks who were always smiling; they were the ones most likely to stab you in the back when you looked away.
So when she arrived at the foot of the Crystal Waters, Miko was careful not to let her guard down. She?d been expecting something more feral, overgrown bushes and rabid animals around every corner. Seeing the picturesque landscape only made her more cautious, cape wrapped tightly around her body.
When nothing jumped out at her, she was almost disappointed. She?d spent the trip over preparing herself for some dramatic showdown with a bloodthirsty beast, and all she?d found so far were some pretty flowers.
?Is this really where I?m supposed to find the White Death??
She relaxed slightly as she approached the water itself. Maybe the article had been exaggerated after all. She?d have to get her info from a more viable source. A local, perhaps, or someone else who visited the waters frequently. Luckily, she saw three figures rising up from beneath the surface, and positioned herself at the water?s edge to welcome them.
As the trio rose up into the air, Miko raised an eyebrow. They were fairies, still in full dresses with diving gear thrown on top. It had an eccentric look, even by fairy standards. They ignored Miko?s presence entirely, bickering amongst themselves.
?You?re no fun, River.? Their leader, in the rose-themed red dress, folded her arms and sulked. ?The eel just wanted to give you a hug.?
?It was choking me, Briar.? The blue-haired fairy rubbed at her stomach. ?Any harder and it would?ve broken my back.?
?That?s just ?cause it was affectionate.? Briar turned to the fairy in the white dress. ?Right, Dandelion??
?U-Um...? The third fairy twiddled her fingers, looking anxiously at both her companions. ?Am I allowed to abstain??
Briar and River both shot Dandelion a disapproving glare. There was a strange chemistry going on between them, Miko thought. More complex than such simple desires should have allowed, in fact. Gensokyo found a new way to surprise her every day.
?Excuse me,? she said during a lapse in the conversation. ?Are you three busy??
?Eh?? Briar turned towards Miko and tilted her head. ?Sorry, we don?t have any openings for non-fairies. Who?re you, anyway??
?Just a passing hermit.? Miko reached into her cape, pulling out the article snippet she?d attached to the inside. ?I was wondering if you could tell me anything about this.?
The fairies gave the paper a cursory glance. None of them were literate, but the picture beside it did enough to get the message across. A grey blur poked above the water?s surface, a set of vicious teeth prominently flaunted.
?They call it the Great White Death,? Miko said. ?The tengu say it?s a blood-thirsty monster who?s already swallowed several victims whole. Would you happen to know anything about it??
Briar opened her mouth to speak, but Dandy was the first to react. Her face went whiter than her dress, the flower on her head drooping into her hair.
?Aauuu...!? She bit her thumb, wings fluttering about behind her. ?I?m not delicious, I?m not delicious, I?m not delicious!? The fairy burst off into the treeline with impressive speed.
?Hey, get back here!? Briar yelled. ?You haven?t dried us off yet!? She made to pursue, dress still sopping wet as she flew into the distance.
Miko furrowed her brow. ?That...wasn?t the reaction I was expecting.?
?They?re idiots.? River?s response was concise and brutal. ?Though to be fair, Dandy did get eaten by that thing once.?
?Eaten?? The hermit sucked in a breath. ?So the monster is real, then??
?Yup.? The fairy smirked. ?Good luck in there.? She flew off at a much more leisurely pace than her comrades, muttering something about incompetence and schedules. There were some oddly aggressive desires emanating from her; if she?d been more than a fairy, Miko might have been concerned about that.
Not now, though. The White Death was more than a tabloid myth now. Something like that could pose a threat to the humans of Gensokyo. She?d have to go ahead with her original plan - find the creature, and make sure it couldn?t hurt anyone again.
?It?s deeper than I thought,? she said to herself, grabbing at the clip that fastened her cape. ?Good thing I came prepared.? She let the cape fall to the ground, revealing the dark violet wetsuit underneath. Grabbing at a bag on the cape?s insides, she pulled out a pair of flippers and slipped them on as well. It was good to have a kappa among the faithful, she thought.
?Alright, then.? She cracked her neck, letting rusty muscles get some exercise. She gave the sword at her side a light pat. ?Time to go fishing.?
She stepped forward into the water, and vanished under the surface in an instant.
-----
The view under the water was even more impressive than that from the surface. Rainbows of fish swarmed around, popping in and out of the coral. The weeds seemed to dance in time with the currents, life bustling out of every nook and cranny.
Miko felt alien in this environment, dragging herself slowly through the water. Air wasn?t a problem; breathing didn?t matter much to someone who wasn?t technically alive. But her swimming was slower than she would have liked, and there was a lot of ground to cover. The waters continued downward, so deep that she still couldn?t see the bottom from here.
?And here I was, thinking it?d be easy to find this thing.? Miko sighed as a school of fish flew past her face. She recalled the other hermit who?d visited her temple, the one who could speak with animals. That was a power Miko would have appreciated now.
?Oh well.? She shrugged. ?When all else fails, go down.?
Miko descended into the depths, pushing forward with hefty, clumsy kicks. The bright welcome of the Waters gave way to a much more bare-bones look, lightless caverns built into the rocky walls. This was more like it, Miko thought - plenty of hiding spots for a monster to pounce from. She had to be going in the right direction.
?Now, where should I start?? Miko pointed at the various openings in the wall. ?Eeny, meenie, miney-?
?Hey, you!?
A voice from below stopped Miko before she could decide. She placed a hand on her blade?s hilt, watching as a young woman rose up to meet her. She had dark skin, a wetsuit similar to Miko?s own, and a jagged fish fin poked out her back. A local youkai, then?
?That?s a nasty sword you?re carrying,? the girl said, arms raised defensively. ?You?re not here to cause trouble, are you??
Miko frowned, giving the girl?s desires a quick glance. The voice echoed in her head, repeating the thoughts drifting in the back of the youkai?s mind.
Get out of here, already. It?s for your own good.
The hermit nodded. From the sounds of things, they had a common enemy. Maybe this was the assistance Miko was looking for.
?Don?t worry, miss.? She bowed her head forward. ?I heard you?ve got a predator looming around here. I?m just here to solve your problem for you.?
?Predator?? The girl tensed. ?You don?t mean the White Death, do you??
Miko smiled. ?And what if I do??
?Then you?re making a big mistake.? The youkai?s mouth formed a small, tight line. ?This place is super dangerous. You?re gonna get yourself killed.?
?Killed? Me?? Miko chuckled lightly. ?Death is something that happens to other people. Trust me, I?ll be fine.? She held out a hand. ?Though I?d appreciate your help in finding this beast. I could be here for a while scouting the thing out myself.?
The fishgirl looked almost frightened by Miko?s offering. Unusual, Miko thought; weren?t they meant to be on the same side? Maybe she wasn?t used to visitors from the surface.
?...Fine.? Eventually the girl took Miko?s hand, clasping it tightly in her own. ?What should I call you? Other than ?maniac?, that is.?
?Toyosatomimi no Miko.? Miko smiled. She didn?t get to introduce herself often anymore. ?And you are??
?Jozu Manou. Just call me Jozu.? The fish looked towards one of the dark caverns. ?You?ll find the White Death over there. It?s a maze in there, so I?ll lead you around. I assume you?ve got a light source??
Miko pulled her sword out a few inches, radiant light emanating from the steel. ?You could call it that.?
-----
As the girl had warned, the cavern quickly split into several craggy tunnels. There was no light past the first few feet, making it almost impossible to retrace your steps. Jozu took the lead, comfortable with the lack of vision, drifting through the water with effortless ease.
Miko hung behind, using her blade to light the path. Whatever angle she held it, there were blind spots all around her for the beast to jump out of. She stayed tense, ready to draw the sword at any moment.
?So what stories do they tell on the surface?? Jozu asked, looking back at the hermit. ?About the White Death, I mean.?
?Oh, it?s very graphic.? Miko stretched her arms out to make the story as dramatic as she could. ?There are claims that it eats whole youkai in a single bite. Apparently the journalist who found the thing was lucky to get out alive.?
?I see.? Jozu pouted. ?I think I know the girl you?re talking about, actually. There was a white wolf tengu who visited a few months back.?
Miko nodded. ?Normally, I wouldn?t intrude on the business of youkai. But there are human fishermen who live near these waters, and they can?t defend themselves against this beast.? Her grip tightened around the blade?s hilt. ?If it comes down to it, I?ll make sure it can?t hurt anyone again.?
Jozu gulped. ?You, uh...you?re serious about this, aren?t you??
?Why wouldn?t I be?? Miko tilted her head. ?Besides, I thought we had a common goal.?
?Yeah, yeah. Of course we do.? Jozu turned around, pointing deeper into the tunnel. ?This way. Don?t fall behind.?
The fishgirl picked up her pace, pulling away from Miko with blistering speed. She must have been slowing herself down so Miko could catch up, but now she was giving the hermit no consideration at all.
?Hey, wait up!? Miko tried to accelerate, but she?d never be able to swim faster than a fish. Jozu pulled further and further away, turning a corner at the edge of Miko?s vision. By the time Miko made it around the bend the youkai had already vanished into one of the tunnels, leaving Miko to fend for herself.
?Jozu...??
Miko sucked in a breath. This was too deliberate to be thoughtless on Jozu?s part. But what motive did she have for leaving Miko behind? Did she want to claim the monster?s head herself? Or did she-
Oh no.
The truth hit her moments too late. She?d assumed the White Death was a mindless beast, but it was a good deal smarter than that. And she?d just stumbled right into its trap.
There was a whoosh as something blitzed through the tunnel behind Miko. She spun around, sword in hand, but the water slowed her movements just enough. The creature smacked into her arm, knocking the blade to the ground.
?Agh!?
Miko pulled back, grabbing at her wrist and grimacing. For the first time she saw the true form of her adversary - a great white shark, staring her down with soulless black eyes. It growled, mouth gaping open, dozens of jagged teeth poking out from within.
?Tch. Not bad.?
Miko looked down. Her sword was several feet beneath her. There was no way the shark would give her a chance to grab it. She couldn?t outrun it, either - turning her back was an easy way to get herself eaten. The shark?s eyes were still burning into her, like they were trying to beat down her will before she was devoured.
In that case, the creature had made a grave mistake.
?But the blade was just to save me the trouble of getting my hands dirty.? Miko raised her fists. ?I won?t need it to put you down.?
The shark went quiet for a moment before accepting Miko?s challenge. It burst forward, ramming straight towards the hermit?s stomach. Miko swerved to the side, kicking the beast in the side as hard as she could. The shark yelped, but the blow wasn?t enough to do any lasting damage. It spun around, gnashing its teeth as it made to try again.
Miko held her stance, but in truth she wasn?t as certain as she made out. Physical strength was that Buddhist?s specialty, not hers. She was just fast enough to dodge the shark?s strikes, but she couldn?t put the creature down however hard she swung. It?d take something clever to keep herself from ending up inside Jozu?s stomach.
She eyed the ceiling. The rocks were unwieldy, barely holding themselves together. An idea came to her in the heat of the moment - risky, with a good chance to blow up in her face. Her favourite sort of plan, in fact.
?C?mon, I?m right here.? She pulled up the sleeve of her wetsuit, flaunting her forearm. ?Doesn?t this meat look real tasty to you??
The shark?s eyes lost their light. It growled again as it resumed its assault, more aggressive and reckless than before. Miko repositioned herself with every dodge, slowly guiding Jozu towards the wall of the tunnel. All the while she kept up her mockery, making sure her foe didn?t realise she was being tricked.
The hermit pressed her back into the rock, heart hammering in her chest. If she got this wrong, she could spend a millennium buried under fifty feet of solid rock. Again. She held her breath, holding still as the shark swung in for the killing blow.
At the last moment, Miko reacted.
Now!
Miko used the wall as a kickboard, pushing herself into another tunnel. Jozu?s inertia was unstoppable, and the shark slammed right into the wall. The rocks began to rattle above her, a rumble that resounded through the entire cavern. She looked up, and Miko saw the moment she realised what she?d fallen for.
Then the ceiling collapsed, and the shark was buried under a flurry of rubble. It growled once, then went silent.
?Aa...haa...?
Miko gasped, struggling to catch her breath. She?d been lucky that the cavein wasn?t more severe, only just wide enough to subdue her enemy. She swam down to the bottom, picking her sword up and slipping it back into its sheath.
?That was more trouble than I expected.? She swam towards the debris, sword still held close. ?Now, let?s make sure the job is done...?
As she approached the rocks, a hand burst out from within. Jozu?s arm reached up, barely strong enough to move. There was no aggression left in her, a tiny wheeze as struggled to remain conscious.
Miko raised her sword. This was her best chance to finish the job. One more stab would be all she needed to-
Wait.
At the last moment, Miko?s ears twitched. She caught shards of desires the shark had tried to hide, too quiet for her to hear normally. She pulled down one side of her headphones, the limiter that kept every thought from pushing into her head.
In a second, she understood.
-What did I do to deserve this?- Jozu tried to dig herself out, but she couldn?t even get a grip on the stone. -I don?t want to hurt...anyone...-
The shark went still, rocks shaking slightly in time with her shaky breaths. Miko felt the adrenaline seep out of her body, shame rapidly taking its place.
?...I see. So that?s how it is.? The hermit sheathed her sword. With a heavy sigh, she reached down and began to pull the rocks aside. ?It seems like we need to have a long talk...?
-----
?Nngh.?
All things considered, Jozu hadn?t expected to wake up. By the time the rocks had flattened her, she already knew she was easy prey for the hermit. When she opened her eyes again, her first thought was that she shouldn?t have been able to open them in the first place. She?d have thought it was a dream except for the fact her whole body hurt like hell.
?I see you?re awake.? A voice spoke up beside her. ?Are you alright??
Jozu?s eyes came into focus. She was lying face-down at the surface of the Crystal Waters. Righting herself she found Miko sitting comfortably at the lake?s edge, trying to knock some lingering water out of her headphones.
?Dumb question to ask.? Jozu poked her head out of the water, staying just low enough to keep her gills beneath the surface. ?You?re the one that dropped a dozen boulders on me.?
?My apologies for that.? Miko bowed towards the shark, deeply and without restraint. ?I must ask for your forgiveness, ma?am. I?ve been greatly misinformed from the start.?
?Misinformed? About what?? Jozu sighed. ?You?re right. I?m the White Death. I eat people, and I tried to fool you. Didn?t you say you were gonna put me down??
?Indeed, that?s what I said.? Miko nodded. ?But I only knew half the story then. Now I?ve realised you?re nothing like the monster I thought you were.?
Jozu gasped. ?Wait, what? Where?s this change of heart coming from??
?I got a good look at your desires. All the things you did your best to hide from me.? The hermit reached out and pointed a finger at Jozu?s chest. ?You weren?t trying to kill me, were you? You just wanted to scare me off. When it comes down to it, you really don?t want to hurt anyone.?
The shark felt her heart miss a beat. How had she found out all of that? She wasn?t a mind-reader, was she? She?d heard the Wonder Dolphin had a friend who could do that...
?That said, there?s one thing I don?t understand.? Miko shook her head. ?Why didn?t you just tell me, Jozu? If you?d explained yourself, things would never have become so...unpleasant.?
Jozu grumbled. She dipped a few inches further into the water, her head barely above the surface.
?I didn?t think that?d be good enough.? She folded her arms and tapped at her elbows. ?The fact is I?m still a shark at the end of the day. When I smell blood my instincts kick in, and it makes me really want to eat someone. Sometimes I can?t resist that temptation, and...? She sighed again. ?When it comes down to it, those stories are true. I?ve eaten a whole bunch of youkai.?
Miko watched Jozu intently. The shark tensed, ready to dive to safety if the hermit attacked her. Instead, Miko carefully placed a hand on her head.
?Hey, what are you-meep!?
Miko ruffled her hair, and Jozu squeaked on instinct. The hermit?s fingers were warm and gentle, stroking her like she was an overgrown cat.
?You?re an enviable youkai, Jozu. I could learn a lot from you.? Miko smiled. ?For you to struggle against your base instincts like that? It?s truly commendable, in my opinion.?
Jozu?s eyes widened. ?But isn?t that sort of bloodlust a bad thing to begin with??
?It?s impossible to avoid evil desires entirely,? Miko said. ?But morality isn?t based on what desires you have, in my opinion. It?s about how you react to them, and whether you can resist your darker urges.? The hermit ruffled again. ?Your hunger is such a deep instinct, and yet you struggle to contain it. I think you should be a lot prouder of yourself, Jozu.?
Jozu blushed and nuzzled into the hand. No-one had ever given her that sort of compliment. She?d have leaped out and hugged the hermit if it weren?t for all the bruises.
?In any case, I think I owe you a favour.? Miko put a hand on her chin. ?Hmmm. How can I pay you back for this...? She clicked her fingers. ?I?ve got it. How would you like some personal training? Something that?ll make it a little easier to resist those impulses of yours.?
?Really?? Jozu bit her lip. ?Is that okay? I mean, I figure there?d be a lot of problems with trying to train a shark.?
?We?ll figure something out.? The hermit winked. ?Just don?t expect to be meditating under any waterfalls.?
-
HELLO INTERNET, I RETURN.
So I have decided that I'm gonna start cross-posting my work on Tumblr from now on! If anyone wants to throw likes or reblogs over there that'd be swell and Sango would give you a high five for it. You can find the tumblr version of this story over here. (http://rouwriteswords.tumblr.com/post/104942957386/the-seabed-ballroom-incident)
Anyway, without further ado...
-----
?It?s not a date. Stop calling it that.?
Kagerou was normally the sort to pride herself on her patience. In spite of her lupine nature, she liked to think she had an air of nobility that most other youkai lacked. Unfortunately all women had their limits, and Sekibanki was starting to push at hers.
?Well, what else should I call it?? Sekibanki?s head floated bobbed up and down beside Kagerou?s shoulder, while her body walked along on the other side. She was one of the few youkai in Gensokyo who could flank someone singlehandedly. ?A midnight rendezvous with your fishy girlfriend??
?She is not my girlfriend!? Kagerou raised her voice, then promptly regretted it. She forced out a cough to clear her throat before continuing. ?She just needed a partner for some mermaid-dance thing so no-one would try to hit on her.?
?And I?m sure she chose you based entirely on your dancing skills.? Sekibanki folded her arms. ?You should really give up on the denial, fur-face. It looks like crap on you.?
The werewolf winced, twiddling her thumbs and running her long nails against each other. Wakasagi was a friend, and for someone with a social circle as small as Kagerou?s, that was worth a lot. So yes, this was just a simple favour for an acquaintance. A favour that came with a few metric tons of romantic subtext and awkward tension and oh jeez she was definitely overthinking this she had to stop right now.
?W-Well, why did I invite you then?? she stammered, nudging away the floating head at her side. ?If I wanted things to be intimate, I definitely wouldn?t have brought someone else along.?
Sekibanki smirked. ?Because you need someone to bail you out if your inner dork starts showing.?
?I?m not-? Kagerou paused. ?Okay, maybe a little. But you understand, right? I?ve never been to one of these super-formal events before, never mind one in mermaid territory. If I look dumb, it?s going to reflect badly on Wakasagi as well.? She forced a smile. ?And she?s your friend too, isn?t she? You wouldn?t want that to happen to her.?
Sekibanki blinked uncomfortably, her head floating around and landing in its proper place. She seemed to bury herself in her shawl, covering her whole face from the nose down. ?I hope you realise you?re gonna owe me big time for this. I hate these song-and-dance affairs.?
?I?ll make all the arrangements for the next three network meetings,? Kagerou said.
?You mean five meetings.?
?Four. Take it or leave it.?
Sekibanki pondered the offer, then finally nodded. ?Deal.?
?Really? Thanks a lot, Seki! I?m so glad that you-ahem.? No, too emphatic. Such raw emotion was unbecoming of an upper-class youkai. ?I mean, I?m truly grateful for your support.?
Sekibanki rolled her eyes. ?Yeah, sure. So where exactly is this shebang taking place??
?Well, if I got the directions right, it should be...? Kagerou pulled aside a large shrub, revealing the exit to the forest they?d been walking through. ?Here!? She stepped out of the foliage, brushing stray leaves off her dress before standing at the edge of the Misty Lake. Even in the dead of night, the full moon overhead gave the water?s surface an almost silvery sheen.
?Oh, duh. Mermaids. Forgot.? Sekibanki peered over the edge of the water. A faint cascade of lights rose up from the lakebed, the first signs of the oncoming festivities. ?Anyway, fur-face, I thought you were supposed to be a crappy swimmer-?
By the time she turned back, Kagerou was already pulling her dress off.
?Holy-!? The rokurokubi jerked backwards, her head spinning around to face the other direction. ?At least gimme a warning before you start stripping!?
?Seki, what?re you talking about? Of course I?m not naked under this.?
Sekibanki?s head creaked around, looking at Kagerou with the corner of her eye. The dress was lying in the grass beside the werewolf, but beneath it had been a sheer-white bodysuit with red stripes along its sides. A leather bag was strapped to her waist, and she pulled it open to start rummaging through its contents.
?The heck is that?? Sekibanki asked, raising an eyebrow.
?It?s called a wetsuit,? Kagerou answered. ?It?s formal wear for air-breathers at mermaid gatherings.?
?You mean a dress doesn?t count as formal??
?Not when you?re underwater. If the currents get under the dress, it might flare up and reveal some...unpleasant surprises.? Kagerou pouted, speaking from experiences she?d much rather forget. ?Obviously the mermaids don?t have anything to hide down there, so they can wear whatever they want.?
Sekibanki looked away for a moment, but made no effort to push the point. Kagerou wiped her brow at that; she?d been worried the rokurokubi would ask why a swimsuit couldn?t do the same job. The answer was that it could, but that would mean Kagerou would be exposing a lot more skin. And on a night like this, she was much...hairier than she wanted to admit.
?So what am I meant to wear?? Sekibanki ran her hand along the hem of her skirt. ?I can?t be your wingman if I?ve gotta stop myself from flashing every five seconds.?
?Don?t worry.? Kagerou smiled, pulling a second wetsuit from the bag, this one in shades of black and red. ?I thought ahead with this one.?
Sekibanki nodded. ?I figured. You?re always the sort to have everything in order before you-? As she took the suit from Kagerou?s hand, a small card fell out of the sleeve and into the grass. ?Eh? What?s that??
?Oh, you?ll want to read that over,? Kagerou said casually. ?Some very important information on there.?
?Like what?? Sekibanki?s head hung in place while her body leaned down to pick up the card. ?Let?s see...Lady Gurren of the Green Lands, heiress to a small manor in the mountains-? Her brow furrowed. ?What the heck is this supposed to be??
?Your cover story.? Kagerou shrugged. ?It?s a very high class event, so I had to...invent some facts about you. They won?t let just anyone in, after all. Don?t worry, Wakasagi will vouch for you.?
?So you want me to pretend I?m some fancy-ass noble with a silver spoon in her mouth?? Sekibanki?s head gradually shifted to a shade of scarlet. ?This is not what I signed up for! You lied to me!?
?I never lied, per se. I just may have omitted a few details.? Kagerou winked, a sly grin forming on her lips. ?And we made a deal, didn?t we? Can?t go back on a promise. Youkai?s honour.?
Sekibanki?s hands curled into fists, and for a moment Kagerou primed herself to weave away from a punch. The rokurokubi?s face turned bright crimson - then, like she?d been frozen solid, flipped back to a pale white.
?I?ll admit one thing: I?d be applauding you if you tried pulling this shit on anyone else.? She took the suit from Kagerou?s hand, refusing to look the werewolf in the eye as she walked back into the forest to change. ?But you?d better sleep with one eye open for the next few days...?
-----
In spite of its meager size, the Misty Lake was much deeper than it first appeared. Sinking to the bottom took a good five minutes, maybe even ten for a swimmer as poor as Kagerou. This was one of the main reasons the mermaids received few visitors from above the surface; even the strongest youkai had to breathe once in a while.
Fortunately, this was one of the many problems Kagerou had taken into account. From the bottom of the bag she drew a necklace with a navy-blue gem in its centre, then carefully clipped it on. As her toe brushed at the water, the gem shone brighter to show its magic was in effect.
?Some fancy jewellery you got there.? Sekibanki stepped up on Kagerou from behind, clad in the black wetsuit. Her arms were folded so tightly that she made look more like a straitjacket. ?Water-breathing charm??
?Obviously.? Kagerou allowed a hint of satisfaction to seep into her voice. She?d spent weeks planning for this occasion, and now she felt like she was ready for just about anything. ?There?s one in here for you as well, if you want it.?
?I?ll pass.? Sekibanki casually lifted her head off of her shoulders and sat it on the ground by the lake. A second head popped out of the hole in her neck, and she took a moment to put its hair into place before continuing. ?Periscope here will do my breathing for me.?
?Periscope?? Kagerou pulled her head back slightly. ?You name your heads??
?Only when it?s suitably ironic.? The rokurokubi took her first steps into the water. ?So are we going, or what??
?Ah! Right. Yes.? Kagerou stood to attention, following behind Sekibanki with smaller paces. The water was frigid, as she?d expected, but at least her fur did something to stave off the cold. For the first time she could remember, her lycanthropy had actually turned out to be an advantage.
It wasn?t long before the ground beneath her feet disappeared, and she dropped without a fanfare into the waters of the lake. She held her breath on instinct to start, then slowly let her air trickle out as the necklace began to shine brighter. When she finally did breathe in, it was so natural that she would?ve sworn she was on dry land.
?This way.? Kagerou pointed towards the lakebed lightshow, growing more flamboyant with every passing minute. If there was one thing the mermaids were good at, she thought to herself, it was spectacle.
The first few minutes of the journey passed in relative silence. Sekibanki was murmuring details about her cover story to herself, seemingly adding new details as she went along. Kagerou, meanwhile, was trying to conceal the hammering of her heart, keeping herself from smiling giddily. She?d dreamed of being invited to a party like this for decades, and it was finally happening. Her, Kagerou Imaizumi, one of Gensokyo?s high-class socialites! She couldn?t have imagined it more perfectly if she tried.
Naturally, Sekibanki took it upon herself to destroy that illusion.
?So this is the mermaid city?? The rokurokubi snorted as a small outpost came into view. ?Jeez, it?s even gaudier than I imagined it.?
Though the houses were few in number, they were all sprawling masses of decoration and extension, as if each was designed to outdo its neighbours. Shimmering stones and hand-carved coral ran across the walls, catching every inch of light from the surface they could. It was a display of opulence so grand that Kagerou struggled to look for more than a few seconds without her eyes hurting.
?It?s a cultural thing,? she said half heartedly. ?Merfolk value beauty above all else. It?s not about showing off.?
?Really?? Sekibanki smirked, pointing to the center of the village. ?Then what do you call that??
?That?s...?
Kagerou?s mouth dropped open. In the midst of all these clashing houses was the source of the lights - a massive castle, with towers that went almost halfway up to the surface. Every other brick in the building was made of solid gold, and it seemed like recent work had been done to increase that number. At the entrance sat two marble statues of the realm?s king and queen, each of them twice the size of Kagerou herself. The queen was depicted as a gentle, maternal figure, while the king was lifting a trident over his head and bellowing a war cry.
?Okay, you win.? Kagerou bowed her head as she dropped down towards the castle?s courtyard. ?Someone?s seriously overcompensating.?
?I know, right?? Sekibanki stuck her tongue out at the statue. ?Like, I bet he?s four feet tall and about as buff as a piece of paper.?
?Maybe don?t say that too loud. That IS Wakasagi?s father you?re talking about.?
?I know.? The rokurokubi smirked. ?Still definitely true, though.?
Kagerou chose not to honour that with a response. Admittedly, she?d have liked it if Sekibanki was right on that count. Wakasagi had spoken about her parents being very protective - and more importantly, very critical of the dreaded air-breathers. Kagerou would much rather earn the disapproval of a pint-sized puppet ruler than the epitome of mer-testosterone.
The pair touched down at the front of the courtyard, walking carefully towards the front door. As they made it to within a dozen paces of the entrance Kagerou pulled Sekibanki aside, using one of the statues for cover.
?Now, remember the rules,? the werewolf said. ?No swearing, no brawling, and absolutely no self-decapitation. The mermaids have no idea what a rokurokubi is, so you?d definitely freak them out.?
?Aww.? Sekibanki frowned. ?You?re really doing your best to suck all the fun out of this, aren?t you??
?Please.? Kagerou grabbed at Sekibanki?s shoulder. ?I?m counting on you here, Seki.?
For a moment, something seemed to glisten in Sekibanki?s eyes. If you looked closely, you might have mistaken it for compassion, though you?d never hear her admit to it. It was gone within instants anyway, replaced with her classic sigh of resignation.
?I can?t say no when you look that pitiful.? The rokurokubi cracked her neck, then pulled her posture backwards until she was standing upright. Her hands fell over each other, palm over palm, and her threatening aura was replaced with something almost docile. Every inch of her form was perfect - so perfect, in fact, that it quickly turned into a parody of itself. ?Well, milady?? she said, in a flamboyant upper-class dialect. ?Does this tend to thy desires??
Kagerou furrowed her brow. ?Maybe overdoing it with the formality there.?
?Hey, at least gimme points for trying,? Sekibanki replied, dropping back into her natural tone. ?Or would you rather I went around talking like one of those damned commoners??
The werewolf winced. ?Point taken.?
?Most excellent!? Sekibanki held a hand out, every motion as exaggerated as her voice. ?Now escort me to the promenade like a true gentleman would. Chop chop, dear.?
Kagerou paused, looked at Sekibanki?s hand for a moment, then grudgingly took it and led her on. ?You?re enjoying this, aren?t you??
?I haven?t a clue what you?re talking about~?
-----
Getting in to the ball was easier than Kagerou had been expecting. She?d been ready for the bouncer to grill then incessantly over their identities, but the guard barely bothered to pay attention to them. ?You?re the only two air-breathers on the guest list,? he grumbled. ?Not like anyone?s gonna steal your identities.? Kagerou wondered to herself whether or not that was meant to be a compliment as she walked through the front door.
In the corridors mermaids and mermen conversed with each other in small groups, mainly about their latest purchases and how wonderful they were. All of them wore beautiful, billowing dresses or formal suits of the highest caliber. Kagerou and Sekibanki were hugely plain in comparison - but that only made them stand out even more.
?Poor air-breathers,? someone whispered as Kagerou passed by. ?Those legs of theirs look so...unwieldy.?
?Is it true they?re friends of the princess?? another girl asked. ?That girl must have some interesting tastes.?
Kagerou fiddled with the collar of her wetsuit. It wasn?t a welcoming atmosphere, but that much was to be expected. She was a new face, and a foreigner at that. It?d take some effort before the community really accepted her.
?Does this fine establishment offer refreshments?? Sekibanki said, giving the issue much thought than Kagerou was. ?I must admit I am thoroughly parched.?
?Probably?? Kagerou said as she stepped into the ballroom. ?There should be snacks for you to-whoa my god.?
Every rational thought dribbled out of Kagerou?s head as she looked into the ballroom. It wasn?t the room itself that caught her attention, with its statues carved into the wall or the brilliant chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. Her focus was on the woman in the middle of the room, giving the crowd around her the most polite rejections she could manage.
?Sorry, but I?m already taken for tonight.? Wakasagi forced a giggle as the wannabe suitors did their best to lock her in. ?Not that I don?t appreciate the thought, but-? When she caught sight of Kagerou in the doorway, her face lit up. ?Oh, look, there she is!?
Kagerou became gradually aware that she was staring uncontrollably at Wakasagi. Every inch of her emerald dress shone, the frills bouncing along playfully with the current, making her look almost like a jellyfish. A silver tiara was locked neatly on her forehead, covered in gems that would have sold for fortunes on land. Yet in contrast to the overbearing effort of her fellow mermaids, she made the act of looking beautiful seem almost laughably easy. She looked so natural, so authoritative, so...royal.
It took a hand on Kagerou?s shoulder to snap her out of her trance. ?Wha? Uh, hey there, Wakasagi. You look, um...nice tonight.?
Nice? Kagerou thought to herself. That?s the best word you can come up with? Jeez, you sound like a moron! They?re going to eat you alive with a vocabulary like that-
?Ah, thank you.? Wakasagi blushed and looked away. ?I was worried you?d think it was a little bit overkill.?
?Not at all!? Kagerou blurted, turning even redder than Wakasagi. ?I wish I could look half as glamourous as you do, actually.?
?Heh heh. You?re a real flatterer.? Wakasagi turned to the crowd as she put a hand around Kagerou?s shoulder. ?Everyone, this is Kagerou Imaizumi. She?s a very good friend of mine from the surface.?
Wakasagi?s seal of approval was enough to silence the murmurings of the crowd. The nobles all turned to her, expecting an impressive introduction. She took a deep breath, summoning up the speech she?d memorised days beforehand.
?It?s a pleasure to meet you all,? she said with a bow. ?I?m Kagerou Imaizumi, and this is my companion Gurren of the-? She motioned to her side towards Sekibanki, only to find herself pointing towards empty space. ?Eh? Where?d she go??
Wakasagi giggled, pointing to a set of dinner platters on one side of the room. Sekibanki was leaning over a dish, helping herself to everything within her reach. For all the fancy words and mannerisms, the one trait the rokurokubi couldn?t conceal was her appetite.
?...Actually, never mind. I have no idea who that is.? Kagerou looked back to the audience, doing everything she could to disassociate herself with the gluttonous display. ?Anyway, it?s a pleasure to meet you all!? She had no dress to properly curtsey with, but she tried to emulate the hand motions anyway.
The merfolk whispered amongst each other in response. Mild impression seemed to be the most common reaction. She hadn?t embarrassed herself, but she hadn?t quite won them over either. Kagerou would have spent longer worrying about them if it weren?t for a larger problem presenting itself.
?Ah!? A voice called out from the back of the room. ?So you are the miss Imaizumi my daughter has said so much about.?
The guests fell silent, obeying an unspoken command, and split apart to open a path across the floor. Kagerou had her first clear glimpse of the back wall, and the two golden thrones that sat against it. In one sat a wisened old merman, treated poorly by the passage of years but still holding a childish glint in his eye. In the other sat his wife, a maternal-looking woman whose long scarlet tail never seemed to come to rest. Both of them looked down on Kagerou with polite but expectant smiles.
?Go on, introduce yourself.? Wakasagi pushed Kagerou along down the split in the crowd. Kagerou drifted along on inertia, mouth stammering open and closed as she looked for something to say. Honestly she?d been hoping to avoid Wakasagi?s parents entirely - acting properly in front of nobles was hard enough, but in the presence of royalty all her semblances of calm started to crumble. It happened whenever she talked to Wakasagi, and the king and queen were no exception.
?Um...g-good evening, Your Majesty, Your Highness.? Kagerou bowed so low she felt like she was hanging upside-down. ?T-Thank you for allowing me to attend as your daughter?s partner-? She stopped, blushed furiously, and bowed lower still. ?I mean as her dance partner! Just that, I swear! No connotations or anything behind-?
?Alright, dear, we understand.? The king waved his hand downwards to calm her. ?My dear Waka was quite insistent you attend, and who am I to turn down my lovely daughter??
Kagerou gasped. Looking up at the king?s face, she saw vague similarities to the effigy at the front entrance. Yet there was no aggression or threat in his words, and he spoke gently at every instance. Perhaps time had mellowed him from his war-faring ways.
Thank goodness, Kagerou thought to herself. I was worried this guy was going to tear me apart. Maybe Wakasagi?s warnings had been a bit overdramatic.
A single look at the other throne killed off that beacon of hope.
?I was against the idea, I?ll have you know.? The queen smacked her tail against her throne, tightening her grip on the armrests. ?This is an important festival of merfolk culture to celebrate the highest tide of the season. Having an air-breather intrude upon it is-?
?Now, now, Lucia.? The king shot his wife a small frown. ?You promised you would behave tonight. We settled our differences earlier, remember??
Queen Lucia scrunched her eyes shut, taking one deep breath and forcing it out. ?Of course, Marlon. My apologies.? Effortlessly, she returned to a docile, gentle grin. ?Greetings, Miss Imaizumi. A friend of my daughter is a friend of mine.? She held out a hand towards Kagerou.
?Really?? Kagerou stared at the hand incredulously before slowly gripping it. ?Many thanks, Your Highness! It?s an incredible honour to-?
The moment their hands touched, Kagerou knew something was wrong. A cold jolt burst through her veins, like a predator shooting poison into its prey. A voice rang in her head, echoing through her skull so loud her own thoughts felt like whispers.
Listen here, you little runt, said the voice, unquestionably Lucia?s. Maybe my husband?s grown soft in his old age, but I still have standards. If you so much as THINK of doing anything inappropriate with my daughter, I will tear every hair from your body and wear you as a fur coat. Am I understood?
Kagerou felt like she?d shrunk three feet in size. The audience looked on unaware, and Lucia still wore the same calm smile. No-one but her was aware of the exchange that had just taken place.
?...be accepted into your ranks,? the werewolf mumbled, finishing the sentence after a long pause. Her hand slipped limply out of Lucia?s grip as she gradually backed away from the throne. Even as she turned around she could feel the queen?s eyes burning into the back of her head. This was beginning to feel less like a party and more like a hazing ceremony.
?Hm?? Wakasagi tilted her head, blissfully unaware of the goings-on. ?Kagerou, you alright? You look a little pale.?
?Y-Yeah, I?m fine.? Kagerou did what she could to get the glare out of her head. The last thing she wanted was to make Wakasagi worry. ?The water?s just a bit cold, that?s all.?
?Aww.? Wakasagi hugged the werewolf close. ?Don?t worry, you?ll warm right up when the dancing starts.?
The crowd meshed together again, all eyes falling on the royals. The king sat up in his seat, holding his trident in one hand and clearing his throat. ?Now that all our esteemed guests have arrived...? He slammed the trident?s handle into the floor. ?Let the festivities commence!?
A trio of glowing white spheres emerged from the tips of the trident?s prongs, rising up to dance along the ceiling. Each of them began to chime with a different tone, the sounds mixing to form various chords and cycling through a spectrum of colour. A choir of mermaids formed in front of the thrones, singing to add a final layer of depth to the music. It was a light show and a concert all at once.
?Wow...? Kagerou watched the display in awe for a few moments. Around her the crowd began to split into pairs, each couple clasping hands and beginning to sway to the beat. Kagerou watched them move, following the sway of their tails and their rocking in the currents.
That looks easy, she thought to herself. She?d had no experience with mermaid dance before, but if the motions were this simple she could at least perform a reasonable facsimile.
?Ready?? Wakasagi said.
?I think so.? Kagerou took Wakasagi?s hand, wearing the most confident grin she could manage. ?May I have this dance, princess??
Wakasagi giggled. ?I?d be honoured.?
The pair began to rock and swerve in time with the beats. Kagerou?s first moves were clumsy, but Wakasagi stayed slow enough for the werewolf to find her footing. After a few minutes she was almost graceful - or at least, as graceful as someone with legs could hope to be in this scenario. The song ended, and a small pause took place while the song-spheres switched to a different formation.
?Um, Kagerou...? Wakasagi looked away, eyes falling to the floor. ?There?s something I should warn you about.?
?Eh? What?s up??
?Well, see, the first dance is always a warmup. Things are about to get a bit more...complicated.? The mermaid tightened her grip on Kagerou?s arms. ?Don?t get mad at me, okay? My mother was the one who planned the dance, not me.?
?What?re you talking about?? Kagerou said, with an air of bravado. ?Don?t sweat it, Wakasagi. I?ll be able to handle whatever you have to throw at-?
Then the flips started.
?WHOA!?
Kagerou squealed as her partner spun her through the water. Another aspect of mermaid dance routine she?d wasn?t prepared for was the fact that gravity was no longer a concern. Wakasagi led her into a dizzying series of spins and twirls, moves which the other couples were copying to the letter. The mermaid was many times stronger than Kagerou had expected, hurling her about with relative ease.
?I take it back! I can?t handle this!? the werewolf yelled. ?Can we at least slow it down a little?!?
?I?m sorry,? Wakasagi said with a pained face. ?Please, just try to hold on for a little longer!?
Kagerou had nothing to offer. No clever quip, no casual comment. Right now the majority of her focus was on not propelling the contents of her stomach into the water. Her legs split apart, both kicking wildly, and she began to look more like she was drowning than dancing.
?Look at the poor air-breather,? another mermaid said. ?I knew she didn?t have what it took.?
?I know, right?? Her partner scoffed. ?It?s a wonder she?s still conscious, honestly.?
Faint laughs started to run across the hall, all of them aimed at Kagerou. The werewolf?s self esteem was being slowly crushed beneath a wave of embarrassment. Lucia did nothing to act, but Kagerou swore she saw the woman grin.
Stop the ball, she thought to herself, her brain barely stable enough to put together rational thoughts. I wanna get off...
-----
This was unquestionably the worst party Sekibanki had ever been a part of.
Admittedly, that wasn?t a very difficult achievement. She had never been sociable at the best of times. In fact, this was the first social gathering she?d attended in centuries. Still, even without a frame of reference, she was confident this was about as miserable as parties would ever get. Even playing the role of an upper-class buffoon wasn?t enough to raise her spirits.
To start, there was nothing to do. There was dancing, perhaps, but a quick look at Kagerou was enough to convince her otherwise. The poor werewolf was being thrown about like a ragdoll, and her face had turned an unpleasant hue of green. Sekibanki made sure to stay as far away from her fellow air-breather as possible to avoid the fallout when the inevitable happened.
Other than dancing, Sekibanki?s options were to eat and to converse with her fellow party-goers. She?d put as much time as possible into the first option, to no avail. All they were serving here were crappy appetisers made of seaweed and algae. There weren?t even any drinks, for crying out loud! What sort of social gathering was this if there wasn?t even a good supply of alcohol?
That left the worst option of all - conversation. It wasn?t even the thought of discussion that put her off. It?d be unpleasant, but she was more than capable of having a conversation with a stranger. The problem was that all the other girls who?d gathered for this event were...well, Kagerou would have said ?well-endowed?, but Sekibanki was a good deal franker than that.
?Freaking melons,? she muttered under her breath. ?Can?t look anywhere without getting an eyeful of fish-boobs.?
The rokurokubi?s hand drifted over her own chest. She?d never been large, by any definition, but the wetsuit just made her flatness even more apparent. And even by youkai standards, the mermaid women were almost unnaturally busty. A small part of her wondered if this was all a joke at her expense, a ploy by the other members of the network to rub in her lack of assets.
Her head wobbled on her shoulders, threatening to pop off entirely. Only a small fragment of self-restraint held her back. As much as she disliked it, she had promised Kagerou that she?d keep herself under control. Things weren?t quite bad enough that she?d turn her back on a promise.
At least, they weren?t until he showed up.
?How tragic. A beautiful rose like yourself left to wilt in the corner??
A merman in a close-cutting tuxedo skirted over to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. With his other hand he presented a piece of coral folded into the shape of a flower. His smile was saccharine-sweet, and his face was incredibly punchable. Sekibanki had to take a deep breath just to fight her natural instinct to let rip on him.
?Good evening, sir.? She picked up the merman?s hand and wordlessly stepped out from under his arm. ?Do you not have a partner to be wooing??
?I?m afraid she was unable to attend. Busy washing her hair, I believe she said.? He pushed the rose into Seki?s chest. ?But isn?t that beautiful? That fate would deign for us to meet, both without a partner, on a night as wonderful as this??
?Not really,? Sekibanki said. ?Simply coincidence.?
?There is no such thing.? The merman ran a hand through his hair. ?But where are my manners? I must introduce myself. I?m Roland, 34th in line to the throne. It?s a pleasure.?
?Lady Gurren,? the rokurokubi said, still refusing to look the man in the eye. ?Green Lands. Uninterested.?
?My, you?re a brash one.? Roland tutted. ?But I think that can be appealing in its own way.?
Sekibanki?s blood pressure was rising to dangerous levels. This was the sort of noble she hated the most; the man who was simply looking for someone to sleep with. He probably thought she was just playing hard to get, when the truth was that she wanted to bury her fist inside his skull. No matter how obvious she made it, he simply refused to take the hint.
?So what?s your family like? Mine?s rich, you know. Extremely rich.? Roland continue to blether, failing to notice that Sekibanki was staring off into the distance. ?We have bedrooms the size of this ballroom, in fact. Very extravagant. Perhaps you?d like to visit sometime??
Sekibanki did her best to ignore the merman?s rambling, but she couldn?t quite turn her ears off. Every word was a grain of salt in her blood, driving her blood pressure higher and higher. Too much longer in his presence, and her urge to tear him apart at the molecular level would be impossible to resist.
?Well, as fascinating as this discussion has been, I fear I have other places to be.? She pulled away, looking for somewhere she could retreat. Maybe a washroom. Somewhere she could scream at a mirror for a few minutes without anyone noticing. ?I hope you have a wonderful evening-?
?Wait!? Roland swerved around her, much faster in the water than she?d ever be. ?Surely I?m at least entitled to a dance? A drink? Can we at least hold hands??
?Are you deaf, or merely ignorant?? Sekibanki glared, the shell of her facade beginning to crack. ?Why are you so insistent, anyway? Surely you have a dozen other women to bother with your ?wiles?.?
?You don?t understand!? Roland said, his voice trembling. ?I?ve attended dozens of these events, but never have I met a woman of your like. No mermaid could ever hold a candle to you!?
?Oh, really?? Sekibanki raised a finger. ?Name one thing I have that they don?t.?
?Uh-? The merman stuttered. He looked back out at the women on the dance floor, then back to Sekibanki. ?Well, you, um...oh!? He clicked his fingers. ?Your youthful form! Yes, that?s what makes you so special!?
Sekibanki went rigid. ?Come again??
?It?s like I said!? Roland smiled, convinced he?s managed to hit on something. ?All the women in this city are milkcows, nothing but breasts and rumps. Compared to them, your body is so innocent, so youthful, so...? He struggled for a clever metaphor, but eventually settled for the truth. ?So flat!?
Snap.
Something gave way at the back of Sekibanki?s brain. The word popped in and out of her ears - flat, flat, flat. As if having to watch the mermaids herself wasn?t bad enough, this man had to show up to rub in the punchline. She made a decision in that moment, fuelled by a white-hot rage that made her whole body go numb.
To hell with a youkai?s honour. She wouldn?t sit back and be ridiculed like this.
?...I see.? Sekibanki whispered with a calm smile. ?But you know, that?s hardly the most spectacular thing about me.?
?Oh?? Roland clapped his hands together in delight. ?Then please, bewilder me with your talents, my dear??
The rokurokubi smirked. She reached up with one hand, gripping at her forehead. The merman raised an eyebrow, and Sekibanki could already see the empty compliments form on his lips.
They dropped dead the moment she pulled her own head off.
?Tell me,? she said, in a sing song voice, ?how many of your girlfriends can do this??
-----
Kagerou didn?t actually hear the scream that brought the dance to a crashing halt. She still had water swirling in her ears from all the spinning and swirling. At first she thought Wakasagi had stopped as an act of mercy, but after a few seconds her senses came back into focus.
?M-Monster!? A merman cried out, darting away from the dining tables before taking cover behind one of the thrones. ?She?s here to devour us all!?
The eyes of the ballroom fell on the dining tables. Where there had once been trays of appetisers there were now only empty platters, each of them occupied by a disembodied head. In their midst stood Sekibanki, arms outstretched, one final head sitting upside-down on her neck.
?Sorry for the inconvenience,? the heads spoke out in unison, a crowd forming from a single voice. ?But I had a theory I wanted to test.? Sekibanki licked her lips. ?See, I?ve heard that eating the flesh of a mermaid makes you immortal...?
The words had exactly the intended effect - unbridled terror across the masses. Screams and yells broke out as the merfolk tried to flee the ballroom, pushing and shoving each other out of the way. Another swarm of heads gathered at the exit, blocking off the only route of escape. Calling it chaotic was perhaps too generous a term. The only dancers who weren?t falling over themselves were the princess and her partner.
?Kagerou, what?s going on?? Wakasagi hugged Kagerou from behind whispering into the werewolf?s ear. ?I thought you said she was going to behave.?
?So did I.? Kagerou gripped at her temples to regain her balance. ?Guess we pushed her a little too far.?
Sekibanki continued her pestering, poking her heads right into the faces of everyone present. The screams grew louder and less coherent as merfolk fought each other for right of way. It was probably safe to say that the ball had been a complete disaster at this point. No-one would want anything to do with the air-breathers after this. But on the bright side, Kagerou thought, at least the dancing had stopped before she lost her lunch.
?Stop right there!? The king rose up to strike the youkai down, trident in hand. ?You?ll do nothing to harm my-? He tensed, only to grab at his back and slump back into his throne. ?Oh, curse my arthritis!?
?Marlon!? Lucia held her husband for support as she looked out onto the panicking crowd. ?Someone, please! Stop that monstrosity before it takes away my daughter!?
That last sentence was a light bulb of inspiration flashing over Kagerou?s head. Maybe all her old plans had fallen to pieces, but there was still a way to salvage this. It would just require a small degree of friendly fire.
?Man, these guys are such losers. Is there anything that doesn?t spook ?em?? Sekibanki relodged her head before beckoning Kagerou in with a finger. ?Come on, fur-face. Let?s show these wimps how REAL youkai have fun.?
Kagerou took a deep breath. If she wanted to be heard over all this screaming, she?d have to give her windpipes a real workout. With a crack of her neck, she pointed a damning finger straight at Sekibanki.
?Stop right there, fiend!? she yelled, with dramatic aplomb. ?You?ll do no more to threaten the good people of this city!?
Sekibanki blinked. ?Wha-?
?What?re you talking about?!? Wakasagi grabbed at Kagerou?s sleeve. ?Isn?t she your-?
?Just play along,? Kagerou whispered to the mermaid, before turning back to her adversary. ?Hear this, beast! Through the powers bestowed upon me by the full moon, I will destroy you!?
Sekibanki?s heads stared at Kagerou, then turned to each other with puzzled looks. After a few seconds of deliberation they looked back to the werewolf, eyeing her up with twisted smiles. ?So you want to play hero, then? In that case, I?m happy to oblige!?
A storm of heads flew through the water, aimed straight at Kagerou. The werewolf dodged to the side, pulling Wakasagi away from the attack in the same flourish. A stream of red bullets trailed behind the heads, flying in random directions, trying to catch her mid-escape.
Kagerou blinked once, and her eyes flashed red. Her feral instincts drew a path through the ensuing bullets, and she followed the route through to the letter. All the while she held the young mermaid in her grasp, protecting her from the onslaught.
When a gap appeared in the pattern, Kagerou leaped on it. Letting go of Wakasagi, she charged through a hole in the bullets like a torpedo. She howled as she raised an arm, making a wide sweep at Sekibanki?s neck.
?Ha!? The rokurokubi chuckled as her head popped off, leaving the claws striking at nothing. ?You thought you were going to hit me with that??
Kagerou smirked. ?It wasn?t the claw I intended to hit you with.?
Sekibanki paled. Looking down, she saw a cloud of blue bullets floating in the wake of Kagerou?s nails, hanging between her head and body. ?Shit!? Her body pulled back, and a wave of heads gathered to throw themselves over the blast. When the bullets were released they scattered in all directions, but only a few made it through the hasty wall of heads Sekibanki had constructed. Truly, this youkai brought new meaning to the phrase ?blocking with your face.?
?Not bad.? Sekibanki brushed at her cheek while the heads reformed around her. ?But there?s no way I?m letting you get another shot like that!? She reached under the collar of her wetsuit and drew a spellcard. ?Harrier Sign [Geeza Guardian]!?
The heads altered their formation, creating a series ring that spun around Sekibanki. Their rotations were too fast for Kagerou?s eyes to follow, and they took turns firing bullets aimed straight at the werewolf. Kagerou swerved and dodged, firing a few bullets of her own to test her opponent?s defenses. Each of them was knocked away by a head before it could reach its target. She threw longer, faster streams, but no amount of quantity was enough to reach Sekibanki herself.
?Come on, that?s not even fair,? Kagerou grumbled. ?Why?d you even bring a spellcard to a ball??
?Why didn?t you?? Sekibanki shook her head and placed her hands on her shoulders. ?This is Gensokyo, remember? If you?re not ready for a fight to break out at any moment, you?re doing something wrong!?
Kagerou cursed beneath her breath. Of all the times she had to come prepared-! She thought over a plan of attack as she continued to weave through her opponent?s assault. None of her bullets were fast enough to make it through that barrier. She needed something faster, stronger, something those flying heads wouldn?t be able to block.
?C?mon, Kagerou!? Wakasagi alone stayed near the fighting, waving her arms about as she cheered the werewolf on. ?You can take her, no problem!?
Hearing the mermaid?s voice brought Kagerou another wave of revelation. It was a crazy idea that had a good chance of getting her killed; in other words, the best sort of idea. She pulled back from the attack, coming to a stop right in front of Wakasagi.
?Wakasagi, help me out here.? She held out both arms. ?We have to dance.?
?Sure, I?ll-? Wakasagi?s eyes popped open. ?What did you say??
?Just do it!? the werewolf yelled. ?And no warmups. You?ve gotta spin me as hard as you can.?
Wakasagi?s eyebrows rose so high they almost fell off of her face. ?Alright. I really hope you know what you?re doing with this.? She took Kagerou?s hands, making a few small swings to warm up. ?Hold on tight!?
The mermaid sent Kagerou into another spiral, flipping her up and down through the water. The orbs overhead played once again, their tempo rising into a desperate allegro. The pair danced between the bullets, drifting slowly closer to Sekibanki while avoiding her attacks. The crying mermaids fell silent, watching the display with quiet awe.
?OK, here?s my plan,? Kagerou whispered. ?On my cue, you?ve got to let go of me.?
?Let go?! But then you?ll-? Wakasagi gasped. ?You can?t be serious. You?re a lunatic!?
?Thank you.? Kagerou turned around to watch Sekibanki. ?Wait for it...?
She focused her eyes, learning the varying patterns of the rokurokubi?s heads. The timing would have to be perfect for this to work. Otherwise she?d end up embedded in the wall with concrete where her brain should be.
?Are you two mocking me?!? Sekibanki and her many heads muttered over each other out-of-sync. ?Let?s see how you two get around this!? With a swipe of her hand the rings of heads spread out, each sending a hazy stream of bullets straight toward the dancers.
?NOW!?
At Kagerou?s command, Wakasagi let go of her mid-flip. The werewolf was sent forward through the raw inertia of the swing, while Wakasagi drifted backwards to avoid Sekibanki?s attack. Kagerou was essentially a human bullet, flying through a tiny hole in Sekibanki?s defenses.
?Oh, son of a-?
Sekibanki couldn?t finish the curse before Kagerou?s drop kick caught her square in the chest. The rokurokubi?s body crashed into a stained-glass window behind her, before starting its mandatory one-way trip to the surface. Her assorted heads watched on as their core vanished into the distance, all floating in place with their mouths agape.
?...Dammit.? The main head, still hanging where Sekibanki?s body once was, stuck its tongue out at Kagerou. ?Pull back! All forces retreat!? The heads swarmed through the newly-made hole in the window, muttering complaints and promises for revenge on their way out. Silence hung in the ballroom as the merfolk watched their former predator flee home to dry land.
A few seconds later, the silence gave way to raucous applause.
?She?s done it! The air-breather saved us all from that beast!?
Kagerou was buried in a sea of merfolk showing their appreciation. Many hugs were involved; based on the pressure applied to her ribcage, perhaps a few too many. Maybe her plan had worked a little too well.
?Alright, everyone.? Wakasagi intervened before the grateful merpeople could smother their hero. ?Give our saviour some room to breathe.? She spoke calmly but with authority, in a manner truly befitting of a princess. The nobles obeyed, pulling away and giving her room to take Kagerou?s hand and hold her upright. ?Are you alright, Kagerou??
?Nothing a little bit of rest won?t fix.? Kagerou said. In truth she was relatively sure she?d broken some bones in her foot, but that was a much less impressive claim to make. Her body healed faster on a full moon anyway; it?d be fixed in an hour or so.
?Marvellous! Absolutely marvellous!? The king rose from his chair again, still rubbing at his back as he bobbed towards the werewolf. ?Though it doesn?t hold a candle to how I used to fight in my youth. Why, if I were a few decades younger, I swear I would-?
?Yes, dear, we?ve all heard this one before.? Lucia followed at her husband?s side, ready to catch him if he overexerted himself. She turned to Kagerou with a frustrated sigh. ?It seems I was too quick to judge you, air-breather. Our people owe you a great debt.?
Kagerou laughed with false humility, rubbing at the back of her head. ?Really, it was nothing. After all the kindness you?ve shown me, it was the least I could do.?
?Hah! Strong and humble. That?s a rare sight nowadays.? The queen gave her a small bow of the head. ?You?ve proven yourself worthy. In light of your achievements, you can consider yourself an honourary mermaid.?
?Ah. That?s, uh...thank you.? Kagerou pushed out a reply, but the cogs in her head were still stumped on that one. An honourary mermaid? How did that even work?
?And as for you...? The mermaid turned to her daughter. ?Wakasagi, take more care with your taste in guests. Maybe next time we can have a ball without a homocidal maniac on the invite list??
Wakasagi looked down, blushing as she twirled a strand of hair with one finger. ?I?ll try my best, mother.?
?Don?t be so harsh on them, Lucia.? The king gave his wife a heavy pat on the back. ?These two are heroes! Why, if we weren?t already in the middle of one, I?d arrange a ball in their honour!?
?Yeah, about that...? Kagerou frowned, looking down at her necklace. The glowing light on the jewel was starting to dim and flicker. ?My water-breathing charm is going to run out soon, and I really don?t want to be here when that happens.?
?Hm. That would be unfortunate. I suppose. But keep in mind that you will always be welcome here.? Lucia nodded. ?Wakasagi, please escort this young woman to the surface.?
?My thoughts exactly, mother.? Wakasagi took Kagerou by the hand. ?And surely our hero deserves a little time alone with the princess she saved, doesn?t she??
-----
?That couldn?t have gone worse if we tried.?
Kagerou talked as she dried herself off; partially to Wakasagi, but mainly to herself. A wall of shrubs shielded the wolf from view, keeping Wakasagi from seeing her in all her hairy glory.
?I don?t know. I really think you won my mother over.? Wakasagi sat on the edge of the lake, scooping up water with her tail as she waited. ?And trust me, that?s a pretty hard thing to do.?
?Yeah, but...? Kagerou buried her face in her towel. ?I really wanted to do this by the book, y?know? Win my way into the royal court through style and charisma. That?s how they do it in the outside world.?
?Maybe, but this is Gensokyo. It?d be boring if the rules applied here, wouldn?t it??
?Heh. I guess you?re onto something there.?
A few minutes later, Kagerou emerged from the bushes in her usual dress. She should have found a better place to hold it, in retrospect; some leaves and dirt had stuck onto it in her absence. Something to consider for next time, she supposed.
?You should probably get going soon, shouldn?t you?? she said, with a tiny frown. ?Your folks will probably go nuts if you?re away for too long.?
?Right. I think we?ve put them through enough for one night.? Wakasagi looked down at her hands, tail wiggling about as she began to blush. ?Look, I want you to know I really appreciate everything you did for me tonight. I know I put you through a lot of trouble, so I just wanted to say-?
?It?s alright, Wakasagi.? Kagerou leaned down and placed a finger on Wakasagi?s lip. ?This is the sort of thing friends do for each other.?
?...Friends, huh?? Wakasagi smiled, her eyes growing distant. ?I don?t know if that?s the best word to describe us, honestly.?
?Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows?? Kagerou shrugged. ?Whatever we are, I?m grateful for every second of it.?
?Me too.? Wakasagi lifted herself out of the water. ?Now, a present for my favourite hero...?
?Present? What are you-?
Before Kagerou could finish the question, Wakasagi leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek. The wolf?s heart fell into her stomach, every inch of her body blazing hot. ?I, um, aaah...?
?Good night, Kagerou.? Wakasagi pulled back, giving the werewolf one more playful wink. ?I?ll see you at next week?s network meeting, alright?? She drifted backwards into the water before diving under again, leaving only a trail of ripples to remember her by.
Kagerou stared at the surface of the water for what must have been several minutes. She rubbed at the spot on her cheek where Wakasagi had kissed her. She laughed to herself, a slow, quiet chuckle that came from the deepest depths of her soul.
?See? I told you she was your girlfriend.?
The wolf almost fell back into the water as a voice popped up from behind her. ?S-Seki! How long have you been standing there?!?
?Long enough to see you giggling like an idiot.? Sekibanki had changed back into her ordinary dress, dropping her wetsuit to sit alongside Kagerou?s. ?I?m guessing you got the hero?s welcome after you kicked me into orbit.?
?Yeah, kind of.? Kagerou cradled her hands together as she rubbed her toe into the ground. ?Look, Seki, I?m sorry about how things turned out. I shouldn?t have thrown you into that situation without any time to prepare. And when you lost it, well...?
?Are you kidding? That was the best fight I?ve had in years.? Sekibanki grinned, giving the werewolf a thumbs-up. ?Making yourself into your own projectile? That was some clever stuff.?
?Oh. Well, uh...? Kagerou blinked rapidly. ?You?re welcome, then. I suppose that means we?re even now??
?Not a chance.? Sekibanki grabbed at Kagerou?s collar. ?You made a promise, remember? You get to do the prep for the next four network meetings.?
Kagerou gulped. ?Y-Yes??
?Good, because I have a few motions I want to propose.? Sekibanki?s head rose up again, her eyes digging right into Kagerou?s. ?And they?re going to involve a LOT of paperwork...?
-
Aaaaaahhhh your writing is still so goooood
no seriously, I love your writing. I can't feel like I can express that any better. You just make great stories.
Kinda makes me jealous...
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Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at leaOK OK I know stop reminding me.
Anyway, have a short inspired by Mamizou's new getup in ULiL (http://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/1983948).
-----
?Do all of you guys dress like that??
Reimu spoke to fill the silence in the endless grey corridor. It felt like she?d been walking for hours, and there was still no sign of her destination. The ceiling lights flickered precariously, threatening to go out at any moment. All she could hear was the echoing of her footsteps on the steel floor, as well as those of the woman in front of her.
?What, the suit?? The woman who?d introduced herself as Mamizou answered the question with a shrug. Her formal attire - an office suit with skirt and pantyhose - was a far cry from the casual tone of her voice. ?Yeah, it?s kind of a company thing. Very serious and professional, y?see. Gives the job the gravitas it deserves.? She made inverted commas with her fingers for the last two sentences.
?If it pisses you off that much, why not just ditch the job??
?It?s annoying, but the pay?s pretty fantastic.? Mamizou slumped her shoulders. ?That and my other option is getting stuck behind bars for the rest of my life. Not a hard choice in the long run.?
Reimu furrowed her brow. When she?d been contacted about a job interview, she?d been expecting a greasy-faced forty-something asking her where she wanted to be in ten years. She wondered if she still had a chance to turn tail and get out of here; she?d have done it, too, if it wasn?t for the fact she was four months behind on rent.
?Which reminds me,? she said. ?You still haven?t told me what company you?re working for.?
?We don?t have a name.? Mamizou adjusted her glasses. ?Not a real one, anyway. That?d be paperwork, and we don?t exist on any official records.?
?So you?re a government agency, then.?
?Something like that.? Mamizou smiled. ?Tell me, miss Hakurei. How much do you know about youkai??
Reimu folded her arms. ?That?s a bit irrelevant, isn?t it??
?You?d be surprised.?
Reimu paused. The woman was talking nonsense, but she did it with a grin that oozed confidence. Either she was delusional, or she actually believed what she was talking about. Either way, it was probably a bad idea to piss her off.
?My parents read me a lot of folk tales,? Reimu said, rubbing at the back of her head. ?They run a small shrine on the edge of town, so they?re really into that kind of stuff.?
Mamizou nodded. ?And what do you think about it, personally??
?What do I think?? Reimu snorted. ?It?s bullshit, is what I think. I mean, it?s the 21st century. All that superstition is for old fogies and kids who don?t know better.?
Mamizou stopped and spun around, her smirk coyer than usual. ?Superstition, you call it??
?Well, duh.? Reimu paused, then caught the meaning behind Mamizou?s grin. ?...Wait, you?re not saying-?
?I?m not going to say anything.? Mamizou adjusted her glasses. ?I?m going to prove it.?
The woman clicked her fingers, and a cloud of smoke burst out from the floor at her feet. Reimu leaped backwards, shielding her eyes with an arm. The smoke dissipated within seconds, giving her a clear view of Mamizou again.
?...Oh, you are kidding me.?
Reimu couldn?t hold back her expletives. Mamizou gave her a dramatic bow, in the same outfit a before, but with two very distinct additions. First was the pair of raccoon ears that had popped up from under her ruffled brown hair, along with a large leaf on top of her head. Second was the huge striped tail swishing about behind her, almost as large as she was.
?Impressive, huh?? Mamizou smacked at her chest with a fist. ?Bet you?ve never seen a tanuki in action until today-?
?Bullshit.? Reimu shook her head and clenched her jaw. ?Absolute bullshit.?
Mamizou pouted. ?Hey, at least let me finish bragging before you complain.?
?You think I don?t know what?s going on here?? Reimu pointed a finger, her voice rising to an incredulous peak. ?This is some sort of prank, isn?t it? You?re some sort of quick-change artist trying to trick me into thinking youkai are real. I don?t know who put you up to this, but I?m not that stupid.?
Mamizou wallowed in her misery, her tail drooping and wiping at the floor. Reimu paid her no mind, turning on her heels and making her way out. How had she let this woman trick her for even a second? She had a million better things to do with her day than listen to this.
?Not that stupid, you say??
As Reimu walked away, Mamizou?s voice took on a lower, darker tone. She was probably trying to guilt-trip Reimu into believing her. Well, she was wasting her time, because nothing was going to convince Reimu that-
?Whoa!?
A figure popped out of nowhere in front of Reimu, causing her to stumble to the floor. By the time the shrine maiden had regained her footing, the newcomer was strolling towards her with their hands in their pockets.
For a moment, Reimu thought she was looking into a mirror. The girl approaching her...that was her, wasn?t it?
?You humans are such a peculiar bunch.? The girl spoke with Mamizou?s voice, all of its humour sucked out. ?You?re so convinced you can explain everything that you?ve become blind to the supernatural.?
Reimu?s throat went dry. The first trick she could write off as a fake, but this was uncanny. They?d copied every inch of her body to the letter, right up to the clothes she?d picked out today. There was no way anyone could have planned this out in advance. But then that meant-
?You tell yourselves that the monsters under your bed are just shadows. That demons and beasts are just stories meant to scare little children into behaving.? The clone pulled a pair of glasses from its pocket, balancing them on its nose. ?And that makes you the easiest prey you could imagine.?
Reimu tiptoed backwards. Her face was gaunt, and her heart was racing. This was more than just a prank now. She was staring head-on at something no amount of science could explain. It took all her self-restraint not to simply faint on the spot.
?That?s more like it.? The clone vanished in another puff of smoke, and Mamizou was standing in her place when the dust cleared. ?From the look on your face, I?m guessing I?ve made my point.?
Reimu was dumbstruck. How was she supposed to respond to that? Every ounce of common sense in her said this had to be a trick somehow, but she simply couldn?t explain it. And this woman?s presence; no matter how you looked at it, this girl simply was not human.
?...Fine. I?ll buy your story for now.? Reimu grabbed at her chest as her pulse started to die down. ?But you really didn?t have to spook me like that.?
?Are you kidding?? Mamizou stuck her tongue out. ?That?s the best part of my job. Seriously, you should?ve seen the look on your face. Pure gold, I tell you.? With a casual shrug, the tanuki made her way back down the corridor. ?Anyway, if you?ll just follow me for a little while longer...?
It took Reimu a few seconds to decide on a course of action. The adrenaline roaring in her veins told her to run away, but clashing with that instinct was a morbid curiosity. She?d always wished her life could be more colourful, and maybe this was the change she was looking for. A terrifying change, maybe, but since when did she back away from something just because it was scary?
?Sure, I guess.? Against her better judgement, Reimu began to match Mamizou?s pace again. ?Though is it cool if I ask you something??
Mamizou nodded. ?Go ahead.?
?You?re saying that youkai are real, and lots of them want to eat us.? Reimu scratched at her head. ?If that?s true, why have I never heard about it until now??
The tanuki grinned. ?Because we?re here to stop them before they start.?
-----
A few minutes later, the corridor finally came to an end. A large metal door confronted Reimu, with no sign of a knob or a keyhole. Beside it was a panel built into the wall, its monitor showing a picture of an eye.
?A retinal scanner?? she said. ?If you?re a tanuki, that seems kind of redundant.?
?I?m the exception that proves the rule. Or however that saying goes.? Mamizou leaned over, staring into the panel as she removed her glasses. A green light ran down her face before the machine gave a beep in confirmation, and the door slid open.
?Ladies first.? The tanuki stepped aside, motioning to the doorway with a flourish. ?Watch your step. It?s a little busy in here.?
Reimu had made all of two paces into the room before her jaw dropped. She stood at the foot of a massive command complex, dozens of monitors firing off numbers and symbols she couldn?t comprehend. At the forefront of the display was a map of the world, centered around Japan with flashing red dots to mark points of interest. Women in suits barged past her, talking over each other about matters of the utmost importance. The floor was so crowded, in fact, that some people chose not to use it at all.
?Uh, question.? Reimu pointed at a young girl flying through the air on silvery wings, carrying a large envelope under her arm. ?What is she supposed to be??
?Just your average fairy,? Mamizou said, before leaning in to whisper in Reimu?s ear. ?They?re not exactly smart enough for field work, so we just have them take care of the heavy lifting. Don?t tell them that, though.?
Reimu nodded. It was hardly the strangest sight in the room. Among the crowd of suits were creatures of every shape and size. She saw ears, tails, even the occasional horn. The agents spoke in several tongues, some of which she?d never heard before and some of which didn?t even sound human. If she?d had any doubt left about Mamizou?s legitimacy, it was long gone now.
?So what exactly are these people doing?? Reimu kept to the wall to keep the horde from overwhelming her. ?Besides yelling, I mean.?
?This is our control center,? Mamizou said. ?From here we can keep an eye on our agents all over the world, as well as rally our forces to take care of any incidents that may occur.?
?Incidents??
?I told you that there are still youkai who prey on you humans, right? When they make their presence known, that?s what we call an incident.?
Reimu nodded. ?And what does ?taking care? of an incident usually involve??
?That depends. On a good day, we just need to wipe a few memories and talk things out with the perp. If they don?t play nice, we lock ?em up until they reconsider.?
Reimu pondered for a moment. She?d mentioned this before, hadn?t she?
?You said that you?d be behind bars if you didn?t work this job,? she said. ?Does that mean that you-?
Mamizou laughed awkwardly. ?I may not have come quietly, yeah. Took half a squadron to take me in. I?d have gotten away too if they hadn?t brought in the big fur-face.?
?Fur-face?? Reimu?s face scrunched up. ?Who the hell is that??
?Don?t worry.? Mamizou smiled. ?You?ll be meeting her shortly.?
After following the wall halfway around the room, Mamizou led Reimu up a staircase. At its peak was an office with glass walls, its occupant typing furiously at a computer. Nine golden fox tails stood to attention behind her, hopping up and down in time with her key presses. She was so enraptured by her work that she didn?t even notice Mamizou letting herself in.
?Hey, boss!? the tanuki yelled, throwing the door behind Reimu for good measure. ?I brought you the Hakurei kid.?
The fox flinched at the sound of the slamming door, heavy creases forming along her brow. ?How many times must I remind you to refer to me as Director Yakumo??
?Iunno.? Mamizou shrugged. ?But since I?m still not gonna call you that, I guess you haven?t told me off enough yet.?
The director shot Mamizou a vicious glare, her golden eyes shining with untold power. Mamizou kept one hand in her pocket, refusing to budge an inch under the fox?s pressure. These two clearly had a long and colourful past, Reimu thought to herself.
?Thank you for your work, Mamizou.? The fox woman cleared her throat. ?Now, if you?ll kindly give me a chance to speak with the human in private??
?Aye aye, ma?am.? Mamizou turned to leave, but whispered in Reimu?s ear one last time. ?Don?t try stroking her tails unless you want your head used as a bowling ball.?
?I heard that, Mamizou.?
?No idea what you?re talking about, ma?am.?
Mamizou raised one arm above her head, waving the director goodbye as she sauntered out of the office. Reimu let out a sigh as the atmosphere began to clear up, her shoulders slacking now the threat of a brawl had passed.
?I?d like to apologise on her behalf,? the fox said. ?Mamizou is an excellent agent, but her attitude is...questionable, shall we say.?
?Seconded,? Reimu replied. She had to admit she found a certain charm in the tanuki?s casualness, but now was probably a bad time to say as much. She took a seat in front of the director?s desk, hands squirming about on her lap. ?So I assume you?re the one in charge of this operation.?
?I do have a superior I report to, but in practice I?m the one who gets things done.? The woman reached into her breast pocket and pulled out a small badge. ?Director Ran Yakumo. Pleased to make your acquaintance.?
?Reimu Hakurei. The pleasure?s all mine.? Reimu tried her best to look forward and not let her eyes fall onto the woman?s luscious tails. ?So one quick question before we begin - what exactly am I doing here??
Ran closed her eyes for a moment, and swept her hand across the empty desk. A folder popped into existence beneath it, and she pulled it open to the first page. Reimu?s gut clenched as a photo of herself stared back at her.
?Reimu Hakurei. Nineteen years of age.? Ran recited the biography with her eyes still closed. ?A certified genius who graduated high school with an unparalleled GPA, only to crash out of college within six months.? The fox shook her head. ?I?ve read your file a dozen times, and I?m still mystified. How could a girl with so much talent be so unsuccessful??
Reimu frowned. She was hoping this conversation wouldn?t come up. ?They wanted me to do a shitton of recommended reading. One of my rules in life is that if I don?t care about something, I?m not gonna waste my time on it.? She shrugged. ?So I didn?t. Simple as that.?
The fox creased her brow again. ?Glaring attitude issues. Just as your file suggested.? She rolled her eyes briefly before continuing. ?As for why I called you here, I?d like to discuss your actions on the night of the 23rd.?
Reimu clung to the arms of her chair. ?I?ve got no idea what you?re talking about.?
?Don?t bother playing dumb.? Ran turned the page to what looked like a police report. ?You chased a mugger into a back alley and beat him senseless. We had a fairy flying overhead who saw the entire thing.?
Reimu hissed. Even the cops hadn?t found out about that incident. Just who the hell were these people?
?I don?t regret it, if that?s what you want to ask me.? She leaned back in the chair and folded her arms. ?If you rob an old lady at three in the morning, it?s only fair you lose a tooth or two. That asshole got what he deserved.?
?That ?asshole? was also a highly dangerous youkai.? Ran visibly winced on the word ?asshole?, but pushed on regardless. ?Based on the difference in physique alone, he should have pounded you into mulch.?
Reimu almost fell out of her chair. ?Seriously? That sack of shit was a youkai??
?One we?d been trying to apprehend for some time.? The fox gave Reimu a slight nod. ?Many thanks for that, by the way. You saved us a good deal of trouble.?
?...Sorry, I think I?m missing something.? Reimu blinked rapidly. ?You?re telling me I beat the stuffing out of some supernatural being? How the hell did I do that??
?Frankly, that?s what I want to know.? Ran cradled her fingers and placed her head upon them. ?I suspect it has to do with your bloodline. The Hakurei family has been blessed by the gods for centuries, but it?s been generations since they produced an heir this potent.?
Reimu wasn?t sure what she was hearing. Was this woman telling her she was some kind of monster-slaying prodigy? She grabbed at her temples, pinching to keep her brain from seeping out of her ears. She had come here for a job interview, not to have her world rocked three times over.
?You never answered my question,? she said. ?What do you want from me??
?Exactly what I told you,? Ran replied. ?I?m here to offer you a position in our organisation.?
Reimu raised a cautious eyebrow. ?What sort of position??
?I?m sure Mamizou has told you that we deal with youkai who threaten human society. Sometimes, a simple discussion is enough to make them reconsider. But in drastic cases, we have to convince them through...less peaceful means.?
Ran smacked a fist into her palm. ?To that end, we have a team of enforcers. Specially trained to combat and capture the supernatural, they?re one of the most elite fighting forces on the planet.? She pointed straight at Reimu. ?And I?d like to recruit you as their newest member.?
?...Huh.? Reimu paused for a moment. ?I didn?t think you guys hired humans to work for you.?
?It?s rare, but not unheard of. Humans join our ranks perhaps once a century. That alone should tell you how much of a privilege this position is.?
Reimu narrowed her eyes. ?And if I refuse??
?Then you?ll forget this meeting ever happened.? Ran?s voice took on a new ominous edge. ?We?ll wipe your memory and never make contact with you again. You?ll never get to explore your powers, and you?ll go back to your boring, predictable life.? The fox shrugged. ?But if that?s what you want, I suppose I can?t stop you.?
Reimu felt her stomach churn. This woman knew exactly what made her tick. ?That?s dirty.?
?I prefer the word ?persuasive?.? Ran outstretched her hand. ?So, do we have a deal??
The young shrine maiden stared at the hand in front of her, weighing up everything that the gesture entailed. This would be a dangerous line of work, undoubtedly. There was a good chance it?d end with her in a body bag. It would throw out any semblance of routine in her life, and fly in the face of every piece of advice she?d ever been given about her career.
And yet she wanted it anyway. She wanted to see how deep this hole of monsters and spirits would take her. She wanted to find out just how strong she really was, especially if she could use that power for good as well. And maybe she was a jerk for thinking it, but getting paid to beat down scumbags seemed like a pretty good job to her.
?You drive a hard bargain, boss.? Reimu smiled before accepting the fox?s handshake. ?But I think I like the sound of what you?re offering.?
?An excellent choice.? Ran?s grip was gentle, but authoritative. ?In that case, your first order of business will be to visit the company tailor.?
?Tailor?? Reimu tilted her head. ?Why are you sending me to a tailor??
Ran smirked. ?To get you fitted for your suit, of course.?
-----
We are the shadows you see in the corner of your eye.
By day, we walk among you. We are never seen, but always felt. We are the faces you can?t recall in the crowd, the strangers brushing against your shoulder. We are nowhere, and yet we are everywhere.
By night, we take up the sword to protect you. We strike down foes you never knew existed, enemies you have relegated to the realm of fairytales. Our presence is always needed, but never praised. When you wake up in the morning, it is because we defended you from the creatures of the night.
We are magic. We are mystery. We are everything you fear. We will risk our lives to save you from your predators - without you even realising we were there.
We are the Maidens in Black. And we are the oil that keeps the gears of the world in motion.
-
/me cues Getting Jiggy With It
Delightful little parody of the almost-start of the first Men in Black film. This was abound to pop up after that bit of ULiL news, but the question was who was going to write it and do it justice?
You did, man. :3
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Awesome. X3
Also, from IRC:
[22:40:32] * Iced nueralizes
-
?I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with S.?
Suika was slumped back in the co-pilot?s seat, one of her horns prodding into Yuugi?s shoulder. Her eyes were half closed, misted over as she looked out at the vast expanse of nothing outside of the ship.
?Is it space?? Yuugi said, with a quiet sigh.
?Wow, you?re good at this.? Suika?s eyes opened slightly as a cunning smirk rose to her lips. ?Alright, let?s try again. I spy-?
?Stars.?
?-Whoa.? Suika pulled her head back as far as the seat would allow. ?Yuugi, are you a mind reader or something? How come you never told me??
?I?m not a mind reader.? Yuugi folded her arms. ?It?s just that there?s nothing else to see.?
It had been a few months since the pair had left their home planet, but this was the first time Yuugi had realised just how big the galaxy really was. Distant stars twinkled at her from miles away, tiny lights that illuminated the empty blackness of the vacuum. She might have even found it poetic if she weren?t stuck in the middle of it.
?Can I fiddle with the autopilot again?? Suika asked.
?I don?t see how that?ll help.?
?It can?t get any more busted than it already is.?
Yuugi shrugged. ?Sure, why not??
Suika sat herself upright, cracking her knuckles as she looked at the black rectangle prodding out of the ship?s control panel. To be honest, calling it a machine was almost a misnomer at this point - half of its mass was composed of duct tape and anything else that could serve as glue. The lights on its face would occasionally flicker, but it had long since stopped serving its original purpose.
?OK, you mish-mash of microchips.? Suika wrapped her fingers around the metal drive, giving it a firm rattle. ?Either you come back to life and send us to the nearest solar system, or I?m gonna-?
Snap.
The brittle machinery crumbled in Suika?s hand, pieces of scrap falling onto the floor of the ship. The small oni stared at her handiwork for a moment, eyes wide open, like a child who?d just put their guinea pig in the microwave.
?Ummmm.? She turned to Yuugi, sweat slipping down her forehead. ?Y?think our warranty covers this??
?We don?t have warranty. We stole it, remember??
?Oh, right.? Suika looked at the autopilot for a moment longer, then hurled the remnants of the gadget against the window. ?Aaaaah, this sucks worse than a black hole!?
She slumped back into her chair again, cheeks puffed out as she curled up into a ball. Occasionally she?d break into a slew of expletives that would have made even the hardiest admiral uneasy. At one point she grabbed an empty beer can off the ground and stabbed it into her horn solely for catharsis.
She?s taking it pretty well, Yuugi thought to herself. She?d reckoned her partner would have descended into madness after this long. Not from the boredom, though, or even the existential crisis of being an invisible speck on the blackboard of the universe. Suika?s concerns were much more...?down-to-earth? was the polite way of putting it.
?What?s a girl gotta do to get a drink around here?? Suika removed the pierced can from her horn, running her tongue along the sides in search of a drop of alcohol. ?I haven?t been this sober in...in...ever.?
Yuugi nodded along solemnly. The oni were a race of hard drinkers. Whereas most people would feel ill after having too much to drink, the opposite was true for them. Three days without alcohol had left Yuugi feeling like she was having the worst hangover of her life, but at least she was still mostly coherent. She was lucky enough to be a lightweight by oni standards. Suika, on the other hand...
?Aaah! Yuugi, do you see that?!? The young oni abruptly jumped to her feet, her eyes shining frantically. ?It?s an oasis! An oasis of beer, right outside the airlock!?
Yuugi sighed. I retract my previous compliment.
?That?s not an oasis, Suika.? She placed a hand on her co-pilot?s head, slowly pushing her down into her chair. ?You?re just going ever-so-slightly insane from withdrawal.?
?Am not!? Suika pouted, pointing out of the window. ?See? Those guys must be here to visit the oasis too!?
?Those guys?? Yuugi raised an eyebrow as she turned to follow Suika?s finger. ?What are you-oh.?
The entire window to Yuugi?s left was engulfed by the bow of a massive starship. Its chrome surface was almost painful to the eye, and the needle-shaped cannons along its underside promised pain of the more literal sense. There was a name printed along the side, but the ship was so ridiculously large that Yuugi couldn?t see more than a letter or two of it.
?Somebody?s overcompensating,? she said to herself.
?That?s what SHE said,? Suika added with a snort.
For a moment, Yuugi pondered her options. Being rescued was the best thing she could ask for at this point. But everything about this new ship reeked of sketchiness. Was it really a good idea to trust them?
As it turned out, she didn?t have much of a choice.
?Whaaah!? Suika yelped as the ship jerked to the left, sending her flying into the opposite wall. Yuugi slammed head first into the co-pilot?s chair, the horn on her forehead stabbing through the leather. At least it did a good job of stopping her momentum.
?The hell was that?!? Suika shrugged off what should have been a fatal collision, walking away with little more than a bump on the head. ?Besides being really really rude.?
?It?s a tractor beam.? Yuugi pulled herself free, her hands running across the control panel. ?They?re trying to drag us into their docking bay.?
Suika pondered the statement for a good five seconds. ?Is that a good thing??
?Given that they didn?t warn us about it? Probably not.?
Yuugi fired the ship?s thrusters at full power, but their engine was too small to escape the beam?s pull. All she could do was watch as the battleship grew ever closer, a hole opening in its hull to swallow them up.
?Looks like it?s my turn to play,? she said, her hands instinctively curling into fists.
?Eh??
?I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with...? She clenched her teeth as their ship was engulfed in darkness. ?Trouble.?
-----
The docking bay seemed designed to be as foreboding as possible. Bright lights flickered and danced from all directions, and the ship?s walls echoed with a mighty rumble. Yuugi counted at least half a dozen gates closing behind them, each larger and thicker than the last. If she was meant to be frightened, it wasn?t working - in fact, the sheer overkill in the design meant she had to fight back a laugh more than anything.
?Why d?ya think they need all those doors?? Suika asked as she scratched her head. ?Maybe it?s to keep out the salesmen.?
?I don?t think you get door-to-door salesmen in space,? Yuugi said.
?That?s what they want you to think.?
After several minutes of overly ominous whirring, the tractor beam finally released their cruiser, allowing it to drop to the ground with a quiet clang. Once it was clear the demonstration was over, Yuugi brought up the ship?s scanner and gave their surroundings a quick check. No immediate signs of life, but at least the air was breathable.
?Guess we?re supposed to go inside,? she said to herself.
?I call first dibs when we find the bar.? Suika was already out of her seat, pulling open the hatch door. Her priorities were questionable, but Yuugi couldn?t argue with her course of action. She followed behind, leaning under the doorway to keep from banging her head.
For how large the docking bay was, there were very few options when it came to exits. The only way out was a pair of double doors carefully placed right in front of the cruiser. It reeked of a trap, but it wasn?t like they had any other options. Yuugi pulled open both doors at once, stepping into the room with a mighty flourish.
She was not expecting the confetti that fell all over her.
?Cooooongratulations!? A cheery voice boomed out of a nearby speaker as the floor tiles exploded into colour. ?You?re the first ultra-lucky spacefarers to be selected for our crew! Let?s give our new friends a big round of applause!?
The rattling of metal-on-metal brought Yuugi?s danger senses to attention again. Eight humanoid robots stepped forward, circling her as they clapped in her apparent celebration. Just a quick glance at their hardware said that they were relatively advanced.
?What?s going on?? Suika stepped in afterwards, kicking at the fallen confetti before a revelation struck her. ?Oh crap! You never told me it was your birthday, Yuugi! I would?ve got you something.?
?It?s not my birthday.? Yuugi stepped forward, hands clenching into fists as she turned to the nearest robot. ?Hey, junkpile. Who?s in charge around here??
The android cut its clapping subroutine short, pointing to a large screen that took up the entirety of the opposite wall. With another flicker it jumped to life, a giant face projected across every inch of the surface.
?You called??
Yuugi looked the face over for a few moments. It was a little girl, undoubtedly - her proportions gave that away, and she had cheeks that looked made to be pinched. Her hair was tied up in short, clean violet strands, clearly the result of some careful attention. She wore the grin of a swindler who?d just separated a sucker from his life savings.
Definitely a kid, Yuugi thought. But that was no reason to take her lightly.
?Well, that was fast.? Yuugi placed her elbow on the android?s shoulder. It squirmed for a moment before resigning to its new duty as furniture. ?OK, kid. You?ve got a lot of explaining to do.?
?Of course! I love a good chance to talk about myself.?
The girl stepped back from the screen slightly. A flowing, translucent kimono hung from her shoulders, with a more typical bodysuit visible underneath.
?I am Shinmyoumaru Sukuna, and I?m the captain of the Little Princess. You will refer to me as Captain Sukuna at all times - not Miss Sukuna, not Shinmyoumaru, and NEVER Shinnie. It?s a stupid name and I hate it.?
?You?re the captain of this thing?? Yuugi?s eyes widened. ?I figured you were playing around how your dad wasn?t looking.?
?How rude!? Shinmyoumaru puffed her cheeks out. ?I?ll have you know this entire battleship is my handiwork. Even the state-of-the-art mechanoid you?re currently leaning on.?
Yuugi held back a chuckle. State-of-the-art? These machines were impressive, but they weren?t THAT good. She?d seen much better in her time travelling. Still, for one girl to be responsible for all of this was somewhat impressive.
?Hey, quit using all those long words.? Suika stumbled over, hopping onto Yuugi?s shoulders in a mandatory piggyback. ?Are you gonna share the booze oasis with us or not??
Shinmyoumaru looked Suika over, her expression paling slightly. ?Uh...is she okay? She seems sort of inebriated.?
?You get used to her.? Yuugi gave Suika a gentle nudge, and the oni promptly crashed back to the floor. ?So what?s this about being part of your crew??
?Oh! Well, I figured that was self explanatory.? Shinmyoumaru rubbed her nose before placing her hands firmly on her hips. ?The two of you seem like you?d make excellent underlings, and thus I?m giving you both the chance to be my second-in-command.?
?That high up already?? Yuugi raised an eyebrow. ?How many crew members do you have on this ship??
?Dozens of them! I mean, they?re all robots, but that probably still counts.? Shinmyoumaru tugged at her collar for a brief moment. ?But you?ll be entitled to room and board, as well as being part of what will soon be the most terrifying battleship in the galaxy! How could anyone turn down an opportunity like that??
Yuugi narrowed her eyes. Even if she could take this girl at her word, long-term employment was hardly her style. Duty and responsibility were words meant for other people; she was a free spirit, going wherever and doing whatever she pleased.
?I like the cut?a your jib, Cap?n.? Suika grabbed Yuugi?s arm for support as she struggled back to her feet again. ?Count me in.?
?Suika?!? Yuugi shoved her android armrest away. ?How can you be okay with-?
?Think of it this way, Yuugi. We?re gonna be sailors. And you know what sailors do all day?? Suika winked. ?They get wasted on rum and grog, of course!?
?That?s true, but-?
?I hate to disappoint you, but we?re not that kind of ship.? Shinmyoumaru folded her arms, pulling the sternest look her baby-face could manage. ?Drinking on the job is a duty strictly reserved for the captain.?
?Oh.? The eager light in Suika?s eyes went out in an instant. ?Never mind. Let?s ditch this joint.?
?That?s more like it.? Yuugi gave her partner a quick bump on the shoulder before turning back to the screen. ?Thanks for the offer, but we?ll pass. Though if we could hitch a ride to the nearest star system, that?d be awesome.?
Shinmyoumaru went quiet, pondering her response for a few moments. Her other hand drifted off screen, and Yuugi could hear the faint click of keyboard strokes.
?I don?t think you two understand the situation.? The young girl smirked. ?This isn?t an offer. From today onward, you?re going to work for me.?
Yuugi sucked in a breath. ?And if we refuse??
?Then things start getting painful.?
A beep of confirmation came from Shinmyoumaru?s screen. The robots in the room jerked to attention, the green lights in their eye sockets warping into a murderous red. They lowered themselves into fighting stances, whirring ominously as they formed a circle around the two oni.
?Alpha Squad!? With a smug grin, Shinmyoumaru rubbed her palms together. ?Show our newcomers what happens to mutineers.?
The robot Yuugi had been leaning on was the first to approach. It was hard to be sure, but it almost seemed like this bucket of bolts was smart enough to hold a grudge. It slowly pulled one arm backwards, charging up a catastrophic punch.
?And again with the fighting,? Suika said, swinging around to stand back-to-back with Yuugi. ?Why can?t we just skip to this part??
?The law?s not too keen on letting you beat people up.? Yuugi cracked her knuckles. ?But as long as we can call it self-defense-?
Before she could finish, the armrest robot dashed forward with a devastating haymaker. Yuugi casually swerved to the side, clenching one hand around the extended forearm.
?-we can do whatever we want!?
With a sharp tug, Yuugi pulled the robot?s arm clean off. She used the moment of bewilderment to follow through, burying its still-clenched fist inside its own face. The machine let out a morose beeping noise before collapsing to the ground.
?Wha-? Shinmyoumaru?s mouth hung open. ?How did you-?
?You tried to pressgang the wrong pair, Shinnie.? Yuugi pounded a fist against her chest. ?And once I?m done playing with your toys, you?re next.?
Shinmyoumaru?s face went sheer white. Yuugi almost felt like a bully, reducing a little girl to a trembling wreck like this. Luckily, Shinmyoumaru?s next order put an end to her guilt.
?ALPHA SQUAD! ANNIHILATE THEM!?
The machines lurched forward, their attack protocols bursting to life at once. Yuugi toppled the closest with a quick sweep, then slammed her foot into its chest as she ran across it. That left only four opponents, and now they wouldn?t be coming from all sides.
?Man, you guys suck.? Suika staggered around the battlefield, bobbing and weaving around the two robots targeting her. ?I could take all twelve of you without breaking a sweat.?
Her unintentional comedy aside, Yuugi had to agree with Suika. These machines packed a punch, but they were slower than a block of concrete and about as intelligent. Even in her less-than-healthy mental state, it was laughably easy to run rings around them.
The two machines heading Yuugi?s way were at least smart enough to flank her. They both pulled back for horribly telegraphed punches, their motions perfect mirror images of each other. Yuugi held her ground, waiting for the last possible moment before leaping out of the way. The robots ended up swinging into each other, each knocking the other?s head clean off of its neck.
?Hmph. Here I was getting my hopes up for some action.? Yuugi sighed, brushing at her shoulder. ?You alright over there, Suika??
?I think so.? Suika had turned her two adversaries into a giant knot, wrapping their limbs around each other in a nigh-impossible configuration. ?We?re not supposed to fight the pink elephants, are we??
?Not yet, no.? Yuugi looked back to the screen, pounding a fist into her palm. ?Well, Shinnie? Feeling any more charitable??
Shinmyoumaru?s mouth bobbed open and shut for a few seconds. ?O-Okay, so maybe that batch wasn?t my finest work. But you won?t be half as lucky against Bravo Squad! Or Charlie, or Delta, or-?
?So you?re not surrendering, then.? Yuugi smirked. ?Good. That means I get to vent a little more stress.?
?D-Don?t interrupt me!? Shinmyoumaru puffed out her cheeks. ?This is MY ship, and that means I get to make the rules! So you?d better stop when-?
The picture cut out abruptly, leaving Yuugi staring at a blank screen.
?Good. She finally shut up.? Suika swung the monitor?s disconnected power cable over her head. ?Sorry, that girl?s voice just made me wanna puke.?
Yuugi opened her mouth to object, then thought better of it. ?Probably a good idea. She wasn?t going to say anything else useful anyway.?
?So what?s the plan?? Suika asked. ?Wait around for the next wave??
?Nah, that?ll take too long.? Yuugi turned to the far end of the room, with two corridors opening up in opposite directions. ?I say we split up and try to find the bridge. Captain Shortie?s probably controlling all the machines from there, so our best plan is to...?convince? her to stop.?
?We?re really gonna convince her? I thought we?d just knock her lights out.?
?We are. That was a euphemism.? Yuugi started walking toward the right pathway. ?I?ll take this side. Try not to throw up on anything important, alright??
?Can?t make any promises!?
Suika waved Yuugi farewell as she delved further into the battleship. Given the sheer size of the vessel, this was going to take quite a while. She?d end up running into another squad of defense bots eventually.
As her hands clenched into fists, she hoped they?d at least put up more of a fight.
-----
?So what squad are we at now? I forget.?
Yuugi spoke to an empty corridor, throwing away the breastplate of the android lying crumpled at her feet. Odds were that the captain had speakers throughout the ship, so she would hear every little thing Yuugi had to say. For that reason, the oni made sure to make her words as aggravating as possible.
?Is this X-Ray Squad? Zulu? I think you?re running out of letters at this point.?
In truth, the newer squads were a bit tougher than their predecessors. They were starting to fight less like robots and more like actual people. Maybe Little Miss Halfpint was feeding them the data from the previous battles to give them more of a chance.
If that was the case, Yuugi couldn?t afford to wait around. She still wasn?t in peak condition, and too much fighting would wear her out. If she ran out of cheap tricks before the captain ran out of robots, things could go pear-shaped very quickly. Not that she was planning to let that concern show on her face, of course.
?I?m getting close, aren?t I? I?ll bet you kept your best guards around the bridge so I wouldn?t get the drop on you.?
Yuugi kept her ears perked in the ensuing silence. If her hunch was right, her target was about to give herself away.
?...Muuu...?
Sure enough, a faint growling came from the corridor to her left. All that goading had finally worn away at the girl?s composure. Yuugi kept her mouth shut, moving ever closer to the source of the noise.
?...I?ll bet she thinks she?s so great.? As she drew closer, Yuugi could hear more and more of the captain?s temper tantrum. ?Just ?cause she?s so tall. Size doesn?t matter THAT much, dammit!?
Says the girl who made her flagship two miles long, Yuugi thought to herself. A few twists and turns later, she was confronted with a large set of double doors. This was undoubtedly the bridge, and the source of Shinmyoumaru?s whining. Yuugi paused for a moment, waiting for the best moment to barge in.
?I?d like to see her talk like that to my face,? the captain continued. ?Her and me, one-on-one. We?ll see how smug she is when she?s just a smudge on the-?
That was Yuugi?s cue to punch a hole in the bridge door. The squeal that came from inside was immensely satisfying for the oni.
?Kyaah! H-Haven?t you ever heard of knocking?!?
?Not really a concept on my home world.? Yuugi kicked at the hinge of the shattered door, knocking it clean off its hinges. ?Don?t let me interrupt you, Shinnie. What were you saying??
The bridge was more open than Yuugi had expected, spanning twenty feet in every direction. Control panels and dashboards covered the walls, but there was oddly little in the way of furniture. There was only a single chair at the head of the bridge, with a small staircase sitting beside it. As the chair spun around to face her, Yuugi thought she was ready to face down her aggressor.
She couldn?t have been more wrong.
?Honestly, I can?t believe how rude you are!? the tiny figure on the chair replied. ?Trashing my attendants, barging into my command center, and all because I offered you a job!?
Shinmyoumaru walked down the steps off of her chair, a staircase that was taller than she was. If she stretched up on her tiptoes, she might have just been tall enough to reach Yuugi?s knee. In spite of the height difference the inchling stomped forward with a determined gait, murmuring something unpleasant beneath her breath.
That was it. That was all Yuugi could handle. All her calm and patience fell away as she collapsed into side-splitting laughter.
?Ahahaha! Holy shit, that?s priceless! I figured you?d be a piece of work, kid, but...? She couldn?t even finish the sentence before the giggles struck her again.
?W-What?s so funny?!? Shinmyoumaru?s face grew increasingly red. ?I?m the captain of this ship, remember? That means you?ve got to treat me with respect!?
?Yeah, yeah, sorry.? Yuugi struggled to keep a straight face. ?Hey, is that why they call you Captain Shinnie? ?Cause you?re about as tall as my shin?? Another outburst of laughter ensued, with Yuugi leaning on the control panel to keep herself from falling over.
Shinmyoumaru?s face continued to darken until it was a raw shade of crimson. She came to a stop on a small circle on the floor and folded her arms.
?I was going to ask you to reconsider working for me. You and your friend know how to take care of yourselves.? The inchling stamped down with one foot. ?But if you?re just going to treat me like a practical joke, then I?ll have to pound you into space dust!?
?Ooooh, scary!? Yuugi tittered, cupping one hand around her mouth. ?What?re you gonna do? Stub my toes until I fall over??
Shinmyoumaru smiled. ?You?re gonna regret talking to me like that, punk.?
The circle she was standing on began to descend into the ground, taking her with it. Within seconds she was out of sight, with nothing but the whirrs and clicks of machinery in her wake. As the hole in the floor began to widen, Yuugi?s laughing fit came to a sudden halt.
?Well, fuck.?
A giant robot rose up from the ground, almost as tall as the room was high. Every joint and muscle was covered in a glimmering chrome plating that looked ten times sturdier than the garbage the droids were using. Steam hissed from the knuckles of its overgrown fists, and a hammer the size of Yuugi was clenched in its right hand. A glass window on the center of its chest showed Shinmyoumaru at the controls, her eyes shining with giddy confidence.
?As I was saying...? She raised her arm, and her machine lifted its hammer above its head. ?Let?s see how proud you are after I?ve squashed you like a goddamn fly!?
Yuugi leaped backwards as the hammer hurtled down, leaving a crater in the ground where she had been standing. It wasn?t just bigger than the rest of the machines; it was faster and stronger as well.
The oni grinned. Maybe this fight would be interesting after all.
?Eat this!?
Shinmyoumaru brought the mallet around in a wide, sweeping arc. Yuugi leaped over the attack, charging towards the machine as she stretched her arm out for a lariat. Her attack splintered the armour on the creature?s knee, but managed nothing beyond cosmetic damage.
?That almost tickled,? the inchling said. ?My turn!?
The leg Yuugi had attacked kicked out at her, forcing the oni to roll away. She made another attempt to strike at the weakened knee, but Shinmyoumaru?s swings forced her to keep her distance. Going in without a plan wasn?t going to work here.
I need a distraction, she thought to herself between short, hard breaths. Having Suika around would be really handy right now...
After another round of bobbing and weaving, Yuugi was hit with a wave of inspiration. As she dodged around another deadly punch, she took hold of the control panel beneath her and ripped it out of the floor.
?H-Hey, what are you doing?!? Shinmyoumaru smacked a fist against the glass. ?Do you have any clue how long that took to install?!?
Yuugi wasn?t listening to the inchling?s tirade. She tossed the panel forward, sending it hurtling towards the robot?s cockpit. Shinmyoumaru gasped, bringing both arms up to protect herself.
Now!
Yuugi leaped on the opportunity, running straight for the robot?s knee. This time she went for a devastating drop kick, bending the limb in a direction legs weren?t made to go. Shinmyoumaru stumbled backwards a few paces, a noticeable limp in her robot?s step.
?T-That wasn?t fair!? The inchling and her machine flailed their arms around in protest. ?You can?t use my own ship against me!?
?Last I checked, there?s only one rule in a good old-fasioned brawl.? Yuugi jumped back to her feet, recovering her battle stance. ?And that?s that the winner is the last one standing!?
She gave her strategy another try, tearing another piece of priceless hardware out of the ground. Again, she threw it right at Shinmyoumaru herself; again, the inchling had to focus her attention on blocking the projectile. She?d found her opponent?s weakness, and she?d exploit it as many times as she could.
Or so she thought.
?Amanojaku System, online!?
As Yuugi made to land the final strike, her feet suddenly lost their grip on the floor. Her punch whiffed entirely, and her head spun as the momentum sent her flying across the room.
It took her a few moments to realise she was standing on the ceiling.
?What the hell...??
Yuugi?s stomach churned at the sight of the inverted world. The broken machinery she?d flung about had drifted to the ceiling as well, as if gravity had been flipped on its head. Only Shinmyoumaru and her machine were immune, hands on their hips as they chuckled to themselves.
?Bet you thought you had it all wrapped up, didn?t you?? Shinmyoumaru pointed to a small compartment beneath the cockpit, its arrow pointing up towards the ceiling. ?This right here is my magnum opus, the Amanojaku System! With this machine, I can turn gravity in any direction I see fit - for everything except me, of course.?
She goaded Yuugi on with a single, taunting finger. ?Well? Where?s all that confidence now??
Yuugi grunted. She wasn?t about to let a pint-sized runt talk to her like that. She broke into a run, jumping forward to pounce on the machine?s head.
?Down.?
The Amanojaku System clicked, its arrow turning in the opposite direction. Yuugi?s head spun as gravity changed its course again, sending her tumbling towards the floor. The mallet caught her in mid-air, hitting her with a devastating force.
?Aaaagh!?
Yuugi roared in pain as she slammed into the wall. The dull ache of her hangover was screaming in the back of her head, her heart ready to burst in her chest. Before she could get her bearings the gravity shifted again, this time sending her right into the opposite corner of the room.
?Ready to give up yet?? Shinmyoumaru wasn?t even trying to attack anymore, letting the changing gravity do the work for her. ?If you apologise for mocking me, I might not have to pulverise you.?
Yuugi?s head was a muddy swirl of fury and adrenaline. She was too proud to concede defeat, but she couldn?t come up with a plan of attack. For all her might, she wasn?t strong enough to overrule the laws of physics itself. Maybe she?d be capable of it in her prime, but now her sobriety was going to be the death of her.
?Stubborn to the end, I see.? Shinmyoumaru shrugged, then pulled her mallet back for the killing blow. ?I?ll send the bill for the damages to your next of kin. So long-!?
Yuugi tensed herself as the hammer came crashing towards her. She couldn?t dodge it. She couldn?t block it. She could only watch as her end drew ever closer-
Only for her to be carried away by a speck of light.
?Wha-? Shinmyoumaru clutched at her controls. ?What the hell was-?
Yuugi was as baffled as the inchling was. Her saviour stood firmly on the bridge?s floor, in spite of the Amanojaku System?s influence. She only put the pieces together when a familiar voice spoke up.
?I have to bail you out of everything, don?t I??
Suika carried the taller oni without any semblance of effort. She spoke sharply and cleanly, with no sign of her previous slur. Even her skin looked more vibrant, like a light bulb inside her body had just been turned on.
Yuugi could only think of one explanation.
?You?re drunk.?
?For the first time in WAY too long.? She grabbed at a half-full bottle of alcohol clipped to her belt. ?Found this in the captain?s quarters. This stuff?s incredible, Yuugi. It?s the kind of shit people pour into their eyeballs to get wasted.?
?Wait, that?s-? Shinmyoumaru slammed her mallet against the wall. ?That?s a priceless inchling vintage! I was saving it for when I was finally old enough to drink!?
?Sorry, kiddo. Finders keepers.? Suika slipped the bottle into Yuugi?s hand. ?Go wild, Yuugi. This one?s on me.?
Yuugi pulled the cork so hard she almost ripped it in half. With one hearty chug she let the bottle?s contents gush down her throat, barely tasting the drink as it went down. That was for the better - it had the wretched aftertaste of battery fluid.
Seconds later, Yuugi felt like she?d just come back from the dead.
?Awwww, shit yes.? Yuugi stepped out of Suika?s hands, standing firmly on what should have been the wall. ?Suika, I love you.?
?I love me too.? Suika looked back to the robot as she cracked her knuckles. ?Mind if I back you up??
?Why not? The more, the merrier.? Yuugi pointed straight at Shinmyoumaru, a devilish smile rising to her face. ?So, Shinnie, where were we again??
The inchling?s face seemed trapped between disgust and despair. She sent the gravity hurtling every direction she could - up, down, left, right. But whatever she tried, the oni refused to budge from where they were standing.
?W-What?s going on?? Her expression grew more and more desperate with each failed effort. ?Why aren?t you falling like you?re supposed to?!?
?You think you?re the only one who can screw with gravity?? Yuugi gave her partner a quick nod. ?Suika, show her what I?m talking about.?
?Okie dokie!? The small oni rubbed her palms together, flickers of electricity dancing between her fingers. A small sphere began to form between her hands, drawing in stray pieces of debris and consuming them.
?You?re kidding me...? The colour drained from Shinmyoumaru?s face. ?Is that a black hole?!?
?Damn straight.? Suika pulled her arm back. ?Though if you don?t believe me, you oughta take a look for yourself!?
She threw the tiny black hole between the robot?s legs, letting it lodge in the back of the room. Within seconds it was sucking in everything in reach, including Shinmyoumaru and her machine.
?No, no, no!? Shinmyoumaru pushed her mecha onward, still limping as it struggled to fight the black hole?s pull. ?You?re cheaters! Both of you!?
?And we already went over this.? Yuugi ran in to land the finishing blow. ?Anything?s fair, as long as you win!?
Her hand slammed into the glass window, shattering it into a hundred pieces. She grabbed Shinmyoumaru out of the cockpit with her other hand, pulling her to safety as the black hole?s pull grew even tighter.
?Nooooooo!? Shinmyoumaru reached out to her crumbling robot, tears forming in her eyes. ?My masterpiece!?
The robot seemed to reach out in response, making one last effort at a salute before folding in on itself. The black hole hungrily devoured every scrap of the machine, like a glutton finishing every crumb of food on their plate.
?Aaaaand done.?
Suika clapped her hands together, and the black hole shrank away into nothingness. Most of the bridge had remained intact - the parts Yuugi hadn?t torn off, at least - but there wasn?t a trace of the robot to be seen.
?Nice work, Suika.? Yuugi gave her partner a fistbump in congratulation. ?You saved my ass back there.?
?Don?t I always?? Suika ran a hand through her hair as she puffed out her chest. ?So what?re we gonna do with Captain Five-Inch??
Yuugi looked down at Shinmyoumaru. The inchling had given up on resisting, murmuring to herself about fairness and expenses. When she looked up at Yuugi, it was with an expression that begged and pleaded for mercy.
?Beating up a kid would leave a bad taste in my mouth. Though I?m sure she won?t mind us asking her for a little favour.? Yuugi gave Shinmyoumaru?s hair a nice hard ruffle. ?Isn?t that right, Captain Shinnie??
Shinmyoumaru puffed out her cheeks in one last attempt to intimidate the oni. A long hard glare from Yuugi extinguished the last of her stubbornness.
?Muuuuu...? At last, the inchling slumped forward in defeat. ?Just don?t take anything too important, okay??
-----
?Y?know what? I?d say today went pretty well.?
Yuugi nodded in agreement as she clinked her beer bottle against Suika?s. Their demands had been relatively meagre, in all honesty - a replacement for their broken autopilot, and the contents of the ship?s wine cellar. The latter had been a bigger haul than they?d expected - Shinmyoumaru must have really been looking forward to her eighteenth birthday.
?You think the kid?s going to be alright?? Suika asked, as the Little Princess slowly drifted into the distance. ?We did wreck most of her stuff.?
?Eh, she?ll be fine.? Yuugi shrugged. ?If she built the whole thing by herself, nothing?s stopping her from putting it back together, right?
?I s?pose.? Suika leaned back in her seat. ?Think she?ll find a better way to recruit her crew??
?For her sake? I hope so.? Yuugi downed half her bottle in one shot. ?She should view this whole thing as a learning experience, in my opinion.?
?Even the part where we held her up by the collar and let her flail about for five minutes??
?That?s a lesson in humility.? Yuugi pressed a few buttons on the panel, and the new autopilot jumped to life. ?So where should we head today??
?Hmmm...? Suika pondered the question deeply, resting her chin on her hand. ?Any sectors nearby with a pirate infestation??
Yuugi smiled. ?You want to get in another fight already??
?Actually, all that talk about rum got me real thirsty.? Suika gave her stomach a pat. ?We?re in peak condition now. Feel like separating another captain from his grog??
Yuugi was relatively sure that pirates and rum didn?t actually go together anymore. Still, the thought of another brawl brought a certain fire pulsing through her veins.
?Sure, why not?? After some consideration, she gave Suika a thumbs up. ?Let?s go looking for trouble together.?
Suika grinned as she brought the engines to life. ?I love it when you say that.?
-
It's midnight. I wrote another short! With diver fairies, who I haven't written in ages.
This story has minor-ish spoilers for Touhou 15. Consider yourself warned.
-----
?Briar, we need to talk.?
River spoke up, as she often did, just after Briar had turned her brain off. There was a vague murmur as her tiny fairy mind shuddered to life, then another as she realised she was still biting on her mouthpiece.
?You can?t call me that, Vice President,? she said, once her mouth was empty. ?It?s a sneaking mission, remember? We?ve gotta use codenames.?
?For the last time, I?m not calling you Her Royal Rosey Highness. Not even ironically.?
?Aw, c?mon. It?s got a great ring to it.? Briar stopped swimming, taking a moment to pose in what she was convinced was a dramatic stance. ?The Pink-Petalled Princess hunting the treasures at the bottom of the ocean! Doesn?t that sound awesome, Lion?s Tooth??
Dandelion flinched as she was called out by name. ?U-Um, it does sound kind of cool, I guess.? She looked down across the seabed, gently brushing at the roots of newly growing flowers. ?But I never knew you were a princess, Briar.?
?Oh, I?m not. Not yet.? Briar looked off into the distance. ?But once we hit the jackpot, there?ll be princes all over the world who want a piece of me. So really, it?s as good as done.?
River grimaced, then snorted out a long breath into the water. ?As I was trying to say, Briar...what exactly are we doing here??
?Hm?? Briar tilted her head. ?We?re diving for treasure, duh. How could you forget that? You?re wearing the tank and fins and everything.?
?That?s not what I?m talking about,? River continued, her fingers digging into her elbows. ?I?m asking why we?re doing it on the goddamn moon.?
Briar sighed. It was just like River to ask the silliest questions.
?River-I mean, Vice President, we?re here because this place is the hot new resort for fairies.? Briar sat herself down on a large spire, standing well above the flooded landscape. ?They?re only letting in folks from Hell, though, so we can?t let anyone know we?re from Gensokyo. Hence the codenames.?
?Wait, Hell?? River jerked her head backwards. ?As in ?fire and brimstone? Hell??
?Ehhh, from my experience it?s more like ?lukewarm embers and loud guitars?. Nothing like it?s cracked up to be.?
?That?s ridiculous,? River said. ?You can?t just visit Hell. It doesn?t work like that.?
?Um, actually...? Dandy raised a hand. ?I sort of went to Heaven once.?
River gave Dandy a blank stare. ?You?re kidding me.?
?N-Not at all! I heard they have really nice gardens up there, so I wanted to see them!? Dandy looked down, her voice starting to fall away. ?But then the oarfish lady told me to go away, and I didn?t want to upset her, so...?
?Anyway!? Briar said, cutting Dandy?s story off halfway. ?It?s thanks to a friend from hell that I heard about this whole resort thing.? She looked down at her wrist, in that fancy way people with watches liked to do. ?And if I?m right, that friend should be joining us any second now.?
River looked up to the surface, waiting for something to splash in. Thirty whole seconds passed before her patience began to wear thin; in all fairness, thirty seconds of focus was a task beyond most fairies.
?I don?t think anyone?s coming.? Dandy twiddled her thumbs. ?Are you sure we?re in the right place??
?Of course we are!? Briar said, puffing out her cheeks. ?We agreed to meet at the big pointy thing. That?s pretty distinctive.?
River opened her mouth to object, then thought better of it. She held her tongue for two whole minutes through gargantuan effort. She watched her partners recover their mouthpieces, taking in air they didn?t know they didn?t need. Hanging around them was trying enough at the best of times, but being hauled off-planet only to be stood up? That was a whole new level of incompetence.
?That?s it. I?m done.? At last, River turned on the spot and started to swim back the way they?d come. ?I?m not going to just sit around for your imaginary friend.?
?Aw, come on! Don?t be like that, VP!? Briar pleaded. ?And she?s not imaginary, I swear! That whole talking unicorn thing was a one-off!?
?Yeah, right,? River scoffed. ?The day you make a friend in Hell is the day a clown falls out of the sky and hits me square in the-?
?YAHOOOO!?
A yell from above compelled River to look up. She caught a multi-coloured blur crashing into the water, flying downwards with incredible force.
By the time she realised she should probably get out of the way, it was far too late.
?Ooof!?
The fairy grunted as the collision knocked the stuffing out of her. She slammed face first into the dusty crater beneath, continuing downward for a good five feet. It would have been lethal for most youkai; for fairies, it was a mild inconvenience.
?That looked sore.? Dandy looked down at her fallen companion. ?Should we check on her??
Briar, as usual, wasn?t listening. Her attention was locked on the brightly-coloured bullet that had fallen from the sky. It was another fairy, wearing a similar set of diving gear along with a tight suit with a complicated stars-and-stripes pattern. She stretched out from her cannonball position, carefully adjusting her jester?s hat.
?Huh?? The girl looked around in every direction other than beneath her. ?That?s weird. Water?s not supposed to be that hard. Wonder if it?s some fancy moon thingy-?
?Clownpiece!? Briar charged forward, smothering the newcomer in a tackle-hug. ?I knew you?d show up eventually.?
?Bri-Bri!? Clownpiece roughly ran her hand through Briar?s hair, toying with the cogs that held her twintails in place. ?Thanks for coming all the way out here. The moon?s great and all, but I really needed the company.?
?Um, you two?? Dandy continued to point at the hole River had left in the seabed. ?Helping River? Anyone??
?What?re you wearing?? Briar paid her no mind, focusing on the star-spangled suit that Clownpiece was flaunting. ?Some kind of logo??
?Heck if I know,? Clownpiece replied. ?My boss gave me a whole wardrobe of stuff with this pattern. Apparently it really pisses off the Lunarians.? She poked at the hem of Briar?s dress. ?What about you? My boss said you weren?t meant to wear dresses for diving.?
?Hmmph.? Briar smirked, pressing two fingers against her forehead. ?Rules like that are for ordinary people, not for a visionary like me.?
?Ohhh, I see.? Clownpiece nodded along, her hat jingling with every move of her head. ?No wonder you?re the leader of your operation.?
Briar opened her mouth to brag again, only for Dandy to tug at her sleeve. Her white-clothed companion murmured something nonsensical about a river needing their help. What silly chatter, Briar thought. Rivers weren?t alive.
?Anyway!? Briar said. ?I was hoping you could show us around. Any hidden goodies to find beneath the waves??
Clownpiece pondered. ?Hmm...not sure about goodies, but there?s a cool palace not too far from here! Apparently some human fisherman lived there for years thinking he was on the bottom of the ocean.?
?Seriously? Wow, humans are super dumb.? Briar gave Clownpiece a thumbs up. ?But stupid-human-palaces sound like they?d be full of shiny stuff! Lead the way.?
?Naturally.? Clownpiece started to swim away, then turned back with a quizzical expression. ?Wait, didn?t you say you were bringing two of your friends along??
Briar?s face scrunched up in deep thought. She made a drawn out motion of counting herself, then Dandy. ?Nope. There?s only two of us, so that can?t be right.?
?But Briar, you aren?t listening to me!? Dandy whined, tugging harder at Briar?s sleeve. ?You?re forgetting about-?
Before she could finish, a loud moan resonated from the ground beneath them. Dandy gave in to her natural instincts, hiding behind the spire they?d used as a meeting point. The other two fairies looked at each other with puzzled looks.
?Does the ground always groan around here?? Briar asked.
?I dunno. I?m pretty new here.? Clownpiece looked down. ?Think it?s got anything to do with that arm coming out of the ground??
Briar looked down. That green dress looked awfully familiar, now that she thought about it. The sort of outfit that would suit a Vice President, in fact-
?Oh, right! River!? Briar swooped down just in time to see her partner pull herself out of the hole. ?You should?ve told me you were stuck down there. I?d totally have bailed you out.?
River clenched her teeth. ?I hate you all. So, so very much.?
-
I miss Alice. Do you miss Alice? I do.
-----
?Could Miss Margatroid please come to the doctor?s office??
A small earth rabbit came out of the corridor, carrying a clipboard half as tall as she was. Alice pushed herself out of her seat, giving the bunny a pat on the head before walking out of the waiting room. It was always the grunts you had to be nice to, she?d learned; they were the ones who could screw you over at a moment?s notice. When she was face to face with the doctor, she planned to be a good deal less polite.
The office was as she remembered it - neat to the point of aggravation. Every perfectly clean surface, each shelf filed without a page out of place, a variety of well-preserved medical textbooks on display. Cleanliness was Eirin?s way of demonstrating her superiority. She was a brilliant doctor, always trying her best for her patient, but she still had to make them feel beneath her somehow.
?Good morning, Alice.? Eirin looked away from her file with a too-well-rehearsed spin of her chair. ?How can I help you to-oh.?
Alice knew her expression did the talking for her. The rings around her eyes had somehow found a shade even darker than black, and keeping them open was an effort of its own. Shanghai was slumped on her shoulder, the doll lightly snoring as as she tried to make up for her master?s deficit.
?You get three guesses,? she said. ?And the first two don?t count.?
Sleep was something Alice had struggled with for several years now. Technically, as a magician, her body no longer needed it, but after years as a human she was so accustomed to it that she?d never been able to stop. It was more of a psychological issue than a physical one, and her long work days only exasperated the problem.
?Hmm. That?s unfortunate.? Eirin read over Alice?s file again. ?You haven?t stopped taking the pills I prescribed, have you??
?Oh, no. I?ve been taking your medicine nightly, as suggested.? Alice folded her arms. ?The problem is it isn?t working anymore.?
?Isn?t working?? Eirin?s face scrunched up. ?I find that hard to believe. The Butterfly Dream Pill shouldn?t have any side effects. As you sure you haven?t lost a batch and you?re just too proud to admit it??
Alice clenched her jaw. Her insomnia was enough of a problem without this doctor making things worse. Would it kill this woman to admit she?d made a mistake for once?
?I?ll put it simply,? Alice said. ?I took the pill and went to sleep. Instead of the usual dream where I?m flying around as a butterfly, I was stuck in the Lunar Capital with everyone around me yelling that I was ?impure?. This has been happening for over a week now, so it?s not just coincidence.?
?Yes, but-? Eirin?s eyes dilated. ?Oh. I see.?
?What is it? Do you know what?s happening??
?It?s a long story.? Eirin threw the case file onto the shelf, where it made a perfect landing amongst the other documents. ?The Butterfly Dream Pill takes you to a specific area of the Dream World to make sure the dream you have is predictable and comfortable. Unfortunately, the Dream World is...? The doctor tugged at her collar. ?Slightly occupied at the moment.?
?Occupied?? Alice rubbed at her temples. ?Is this something to do with that lunar incident Marisa dealt with a few weeks ago??
?That?s correct. The problem?s been resolved, but it will still take some time for the Lunarians to make their way out of the Dream World.? Eirin cleared her throat. ?So it?s not the fault of my medicine, you understand. It?s just unfortunate circumstances that have rendered it ineffective.?
For a brief moment, Alice considered punching the doctor square in the face. She decided it wouldn?t end well. There were still a few dozen rabbits between her and the exit, after all.
?I don?t care whose fault it is,? she said, pausing to yawn. ?I just want an alternative so I can get some rest.?
?An alternative?? Eirin put a hand on her chin. ?Hmm. Now that I think about it, there is one substance that might help you.?
The doctor pulled a massive encyclopedia from the bookshelf at her side. Fluttering through the pages, she came to a firm stop at the exact point she was looking for. She held the page up to Alice, holding the book like a mother telling her child a bedtime story.
?There?s a little-known herb called slumberweed,? Eirin said, pointing to a large illustration of it in the book. ?It?s a common remedy used by the merfolk for sleep issues. You won?t have any pleasant dreams, but it?ll do a good job of knocking you out.?
?Perfect,? Alice said. ?How much for a month?s supply??
?I?m afraid I don?t have any in stock.? Eirin closed the book with a shake of her head. ?The merpeople are quite protective of their ingredients, you see. People who ask for samples tend to get threatened with large tridents. You?ll have to procure this slumberweed on your own.?
?But you just said that they wouldn?t hand it over.?
?I never said you had to get their permission.? Eirin smirked. ?But maybe a few samples the mermaids in the Misty Lake are cultivating could...disappear. And one of them might even find its way onto my desk.?
Alice felt her shoulders tense. ?Eirin, are you telling me to steal something for you??
?Heavens, no. I only made a hypothetical assumption.? Eirin leaned closer. ?But if you WERE to bring me one of these herbs, perhaps I could concoct a new medicine from it. And that would be to both of our benefits, would it not??
Alice gnashed her teeth. If Eirin wanted her help, she could have at least been more upfront about it. Besides that, the thought of stealing something left her uneasy; not because she was a stickler for the law, but rather because it was the sort of thing she?d imagine Marisa doing. True magicians like her were supposed to be above plundering their ingredients.
But if her options were betraying her ideals or continuing her sleepless streak, she?d go for the former any day.
?Wake up, Shanghai.? Alice brushed her hand along the doll?s back, beckoning her awake with a few strokes. ?We?ve got some hardcore planning to do.?
-----
In retrospect, maybe Alice had overdone it a little.
She?d retreated to her cottage with a simple plan - put together a water-breathing charm so she could infiltrate the academy. Any magician worth their salt could come up with that kind of spell in five minutes. That should have been the only preparation she needed.
But what about her clothes? She liked her dress, and she didn?t want it to get soaked. She could strip down to her undergarments, but not only would that be shameful she?d likely freeze to death. She?d have to make an outfit that would shield her against the cold. And something so she could move faster, and something else to keep the water out of her eyes...
Before she knew it, her mundane preparations had turned into a full-blown project. The more she worked, the more she found to work on. Her fatigue pushed her into a dreamlike euphoria, striking her with inspiration she?d never have found when she was awake. She even made contact with Marisa?s kappa friend to put on the final touches.
When the night of the heist came, Alice was more than ready. She arrived at the lake moments after sundown, changing in the bushes while Shanghai stood lookout for passing lechers. She?d have changed in the comfort of her home, but flying around in this might garner some strange looks. And the specifics of her outfit made walking...difficult.
?I really hope I get more than one use out of this thing...?
Alice emerged a few minutes later in what she could only call a mermaid suit. The silky fabric was a baby blue-shade, covering her whole body while holding her legs in the shape of a mermaid?s tail. Extra fins on the back of her arms gave her an extra layer of aerodynamics. Nitori?s help with the schematics had been invaluable, and after a few minutes practice she was confident she could keep up with a mermaid in the water.
?Ready, Shanghai??
The doll saluted at her master?s command. Alice had taken the time to tweak Shanghai as well, giving her a mermaid tail of her own so the pair matched. She hugged a flashlight with both hands, ready to guide her master?s path through the water.
?Alright, then.? Alice pulled her dive mask down over her eyes and murmured an incantation. ?Let?s go steal some plants.?
The cold struck her almost as soon as she submerged. Her suit?s inbuilt heat charms took a second to kick in. The sensation was like huddling up in front of a warm fire, and immediately she knew she?d made the right call taking her time on this project. The Quest To Get Some Goddamn Sleep was not one she would pursue half-heartedly.
?Hrrrm.? Once she was sure the water-breathing charm worked as intended, Alice turned her attention to the lakebed. ?If the map I found was accurate, it should be in this vicinity...?
She blindly swam deeper, hoping her intuition was on the mark. Shanghai dutifully pointed her torch for her master, but the light was obviously too weak to make much impact. It took a few minutes of descent before the landscape became visible to any degree - and thankfully, her destination was kind enough to light itself up for her.
St. Triton?s Academy For The Magically Talented was the only academic institution the mermaids of Gensokyo had. From what Alice had read it was quite a cushy place to work, and the view from a distance certainly gave that impression. Warm lights still drifted around the dormitories, keeping young students from fumbling around in the dark. The school itself had the mystical quality she expected, the currents humming with lingering magic.
It wasn?t the school itself she was interested in, though. She dolphin-kicked around the grounds, locking her eyes on the apothecary behind the main building. This was where they grew the plants and ingredients needed for their spells. It looked almost like a greenhouse, its glass windows doing nothing to hide the valuable catalysts being stored within.
The most surprising thing was how simple it all looked. The entrance hung ajar, and a quick check showed there weren?t any protective wards on the grounds. There was nothing stopping Alice from stepping inside and pilfering everything she pleased.
?If people are this careless with their goods, it?s no wonder Marisa makes such a killing.?
Alice slipped through the hole, Shanghai flopping along behind her. She was met a variety of with stacked shelves and questionable sorting methods. Tiny scraps of paper gave the names of each of the samples, but they seemed to have been laid out in no particular order.
The puppeteer sighed. For once, she missed Eirin?s obsessive cleanliness. With no clue where to look, she?d have to search every aisle until she found what she needed. She started skimming through the collection, looking for anything that resembled what she?d seen in the illustration.
Her leisurely searching was interrupted by another voice.
?...Stupid detention work...?
Someone grumbled to themselves three aisles away. Alice instinctively ducked into a side aisle, pressing herself into the wall and slowing her breathing.
?Shanghai.? She whispered to her doll. ?Kill the light.?
Shanghai nodded, fumbling to turn off the flashlight. The waters were dark and murky, making Alice almost impossible to make out from her hiding spot.
Of course there?s a guard, she thought to herself. Nothing ever gets to be easy for me.
It took a few minutes for the warden to saunter past. It was a young mermaid in school robes, clutching a lantern as she swung it along the empty aisles. Her pale red scales matched her hair, tied into twintails with small star clips. She rubbed at her eyes with a tiredness that felt painfully familiar to Alice.
?Why?d they even give me this job, anyway?? The girl muttered to herself as she went about her work. ?They could?ve just set up a sentry ward, but nooo, it?s gotta be a manned post. It?s like they don?t want me to get any sleep.?
Alice had to feel for the girl. In any other scenario she?d have chastised the school for working her to such a limit. As it was, though, Alice was grateful that the one guard on patrol wasn?t at her best.
?Shanghai.? She whispered another order as the mermaid moved on. ?Head left.?
There was a brief shuffling before the doll tilted her head.
?My left IS your left, Shanghai.?
Shanghai gasped, then followed along behind her mistress. They?d have to move carefully to avoid detection, and they couldn?t use the flashlight without giving themselves away. Alice was forced to squint at barely-visible labels, hoping she found what she needed before her eyes broke from the exertion.
?Is this it?? Alice grabbed a jar from the shelf, trying to discern its contents. She could make out some sort of plant inside, but it was hard to tell any more than that. She pulled the lid open, hoping she?d get a better view.
It soon became clear that what she?d grabbed was in fact a mandragora seedling.
?SCREEEEEE!?
The creature yelled the moment Alice unscrewed the lid. After she?d finished reeling she hastily undid her work and shoved the jar back onto the shelf.
?Eh? What was that??
The mermaid guard swerved out of her patrol route, her sloshing strokes drawing closer and closer. Alice panicked, pressing herself into the tiny gap between the shelf and the wall, pulling in Shanghai along with her. She concealed herself just in time for the mermaid?s lantern to illuminate the spot where she?d been.
?Hmmm.? The mermaid swam over to the mandragora, poking at the glass bottle once or twice. ?Guess I?m hearing things.?
Alice sighed with relief. That had been a close one. Now all she?d have to do is keep quiet, and the trouble would be past-
Oh no.
Alice felt something welling in her throat. Something she REALLY couldn?t afford to let out at a time like this. She tried to force it down, but every moment she spent looking at the sleepy sentry made her urge ever stronger.
As she saw the girl open her mouth, the desire became too strong to resist.
?...Haaaaah...?
Alice let out the loudest yawn she?d ever given in her life. Given her lack of rest, it was a totally natural reaction.
It was also the worst thing she could have done.
?Eh?? The mermaid swung her lantern in the direction of the noise. ?Hey, you! What?re you doing here?!?
Crap. Alice cursed under her breath. Now things were going to get unpleasant. She swung around to the other side of the shelf, hoping the gap between them would buy her some time.
She was wrong.
?Respirus Disparus!?
The mermaid called out an incantation Alice didn?t recognise. It didn?t take her long to realise its effect, as the slits across her throat faded away.
She couldn?t breathe.
?Mmmgllb!?
Alice cupped a hand around her mouth. She tried to reset the water-breathing charm, but the magic shorted out along her fingers.
?A-HA!? The mermaid swooped over the shelf, her arms folded as she hung upside-down. ?Only an air-breather would be stupid enough to rob us. Bet you feel real dumb now, huh??
Alice felt her air trickling out of her lips. Of course the mermaids would have a spell to dispel her water-breathing charm. It was an obvious counterspell she should have seen coming a mile away.
Luckily, she had.
Now!
Alice put her free hand behind her back. Ultimately it didn?t matter where, as long as no-one could see it. She focused her mind, imagining her inventory, bringing out the item she needed most right now. She closed her hand around cold metal.
?Eh?? The mermaid tilted her head. ?What?re you doing??
Alice responded by revealing what she?d pulled from beyond the ether. It was a simple handheld rebreather, another extra Nitori had thrown in with the suit. She promptly bit down on it, savouring the taste of oxygen.
?H-Hey, that?s cheating!? The student went red in the face. ?You didn?t have that before!?
?You?re right.?
The mermaid blinked. ?Eh? Who said that??
?Me, silly.?
Shanghai waved for the girl?s attention, Alice?s voice coming from her lips. The puppeteer couldn?t speak with the rebreather on, so she had to settle for some ventriloquism.
?I pulled this from a pocket dimension of mine,? Shanghai continued. ?Did you really think I wasn?t ready for a simple counterspell? No wonder you got stuck with the midnight shift.?
The mermaid?s face scrunched up, like she was on the verge of throwing a fit. ?You stupid air-breathers with your no-good loopholes!?
?Besides, aren?t you being a bit forward?? Alice and Shanghai shrugged shamefully in unison. ?We have a process for settling disputes here in Gensokyo. Even larceny.?
The student stared into space for a few seconds. Alice could see the two cogs in her brain clicking together before she finally gasped in realisation.
?Oh, right!? The girl pointed her wand at Alice like an accusing finger. ?I, Meredy Prometheus, challenge you to a spellcard duel!?
?That?s more like it.? Alice gave her opponent the tiniest bow she could manage. ?I, Alice Margatroid, accept your challenge. If you defeat me, I?ll turn myself in.?
?You mean WHEN I defeat you.? Meredy smirked. ?One spellcard each??
?Sure, but I won?t need to use mine.? Shanghai said. ?I assume you only HAVE one spellcard??
?Ye-? The girl opened her mouth, then jammed it shut. ?I mean, what gives you that idea??
The doll giggled. ?Mainly because you look about as threatening as a stage 1 midboss.?
Alice could see the vein popping out on the mermaid?s forehead. All according to plan, of course - an angry opponent tended to make more mistakes.
?You?re gonna regret pissing me off, understand?? Meredy squeezed at her wand, its tip glowing red. ?I?m the best duelist St. Triton?s ever seen!?
Alice rolled her eyes. She idly wondered what sort of bullets this girl would go for. Something scale-themed, maybe? Marisa had fought a mermaid like that once. That fight had been a pushover, so she couldn?t imagine this girl would be-
?Fire Sign [Sauna Shooter]!?
A bellowing fireball flew from the tip of Meredy?s wand, aimed right at Alice?s chest. The puppeteer barely had time to dodge, rolling to the side as the attack slammed into the shelf behind her. She hoped nobody had been using that mandragora.
?What the hell is that?!? Shanghai yelled.
?Oh, the fire?? Meredy brushed her hair away. ?That?s my speciality. No-one sees it coming.?
?That?s not what I meant!? Alice shot the mermaid a glare. ?That?s not what danmaku is meant to look like!?
?Says who?? Meredy puffed out her chest. ?So what if it?s not slow or pretty? All that matters is if it works!?
She sent another barrage of fireballs in Alice?s direction, her attacks lacking in depth or complexity. It was a fighting style that was familiar in the worst possible way.
And as basic as the strategy was, it had its merits. Alice hadn?t seen bullets this fast since she fought the newspaper tengu. There wasn?t enough room between shelves to dodge and counterattack at the same time, so she was locked on the defensive. Meredy?s attacks flew left and right, setting shelves alight and consuming their contents.
?You realise you?re burning down the building you?re meant to be protecting, right?? Shanghai hung close to Meredy, continuing her emotional assault. ?What?re your teachers going to think when they find out??
Meredy puffed out her cheeks. ?I?ll just tell them you did it! Then they?ll give me a medal for defending the school for the rotten air-breather menace!?
Alice had started to tune out the girl?s voice at this point. She wasn?t in any danger, but the longer this fight lasted the more damage the apothecary would suffer. If her precious slumberweed was destroyed, the whole heist would have been for nothing.
?Fine.? Alice hid her hand, reaching into her pocket dimension. ?I?ll show you what a real spellcard looks like.?
Her hand closed around familiar cloth and thread. Ducking under another fireball she pounced forward in the water, her mermaid tail propelling her with incredible speed.
?Magic Sign [Artful Sacrifice]!?
She flung her doll forward, aimed at Meredy?s chest, then curved upwards toward the ceiling. The doll released a small wave of bullets, forcing Meredy to focus on it instead of its user.
?What?s this?? The mermaid chuckled. ?As if some crummy puppet is gonna stop me!?
She pointed her wand at the puppet, its tip flashing a brilliant white before a giant flame emerged from it. The doll was rapidly engulfed, its attack powerless against the fire?s might.
?See?? Meredy smiled. ?Easy as-?
BOOOOOOOM.
Alice was smart enough to cover her ears before the explosion. Meredy was less fortunate, standing point blank as the doll erupted in its own fanfare of fire and bullets. The mermaid was blown back into the wall, half a dozen bullets hitting her before she could recover. With a pop, the flames she?d thrown around the room vanished into nothing, their lingering power flowing into Alice. She felt the nullification spell fade away, and took the chance to reapply her water breathing charm.
?Spellcard captured.? As she pulled off her rebreather, Alice wore a catlike grin. ?Now that I have your co-operation, could you please tell me where you keep your slumberweed??
Meredy was slumped on the floor, her tail flapping around incessantly. She was a girl with serious authority issues, that much Alice had already determined. But at least she seemed to respect the spellcard rules.
?Down there,? she grumbled. ?Third shelf to your left.?
?Thank you.?
Alice swam over to the shelf in question, moving casually now the threat had passed. She found the plant held in a small glass tank, too large to carry back to the surface herself. She settled for sending it to her pocket dimension instead, where she?d retrieve it from when she made it home.
?Still, I wasn?t expecting to get in a fight,? Alice said as she returned to Meredy. ?I didn?t think you merfolk cared for combat magic.?
?We don?t,? Meredy muttered, hugging at her tail. ?They don?t even teach us self-defense at St. Triton?s. It?s all the boring stuff like transmutation and fortune telling.?
?That?s...that?s disgraceful.? Alice frowned. ?A curriculum without anything life threatening? You?ll never make a good magician with a plan like that.?
?I know, right?!? Meredy popped up, suddenly struck with enthusiasm. ?I had to look this all up myself, y?see? Normally only the royals get to make spellcards, but I figured out how to make one by myself! All the teachers say I?m a troublemaker, but you understand me, right??
Alice looked back at the smouldering wreck the apothecary had become. She considered saying something particularly cruel, but she?d already had enough drama for today.
?You...? She paused, trying to find a compliment that wasn?t outright false. ?You have potential, I suppose? But you?re lacking in control, finesse, tact, and just about everything else.?
By Alice?s standards, a statement like that was relatively merciful. Meredy looked like she?d been stabbed, but moments later she was grabbing at Alice?s arm.
?Hey! You?re a magician, right?? The mermaid?s eyes lit up. ?Do you do tutoring? I wanna learn how to fight like you do!?
?I don?t take apprentices,? Alice replied. ?Whatever price you?re offering, I?m not interested.?
?But, but...? Meredy stammered for a moment, then gasped. ?That?s right! I can get you all the slumberweed you want! Even that sample you stole is gonna run out eventually, right??
?Yes, but that?s why I?m sending a sample to-?
To a pharmacist who I really can?t stand, Alice thought to herself. One who?d undoubtedly pat herself on the back in spite of Alice doing all the work. One who?d charge ludicrous prices for a drug that was a replacement for a mistake she?d never admit to making.
Alice had gone into this assuming she had no choice but to play along. But maybe there was a way she could get what she needed while giving Eirin the middle finger she so desperately deserved.
?Hmm.? Alice thought over the plan for a while longer before responding. ?Actually, I think we can make that work.?
?Really?!? Meredy?s tail began to flap again. ?So you?ll give me one-on-one training??
?Not quite,? Alice said. ?I have another idea in mind.?
-----
?Is that a lesson plan??
Marisa looked over the documents on Alice?s desk with a scratch of her head. Alice was impressed she?d bothered to learn any form of magical notation, even if this was designed for absolute beginners.
?It is, yes.? Alice kept a grip on the paper so Marisa wouldn?t get any ideas. ?I?ve taken up a side job teaching at St. Triton?s.?
?St. Triton?s?? Marisa furrowed her brow. ?That upstuck merfolk academy??
?Apparently, they had a break-in rather recently,? Alice said, her voice calm and neutral from hours of rehearsal. ?Lots of their ingredients and catalysts got stolen or destroyed. So they wanted a teacher to help the students learn self-defense.?
?Huh.? The witch pondered for a moment, then smiled. ?How much are they paying you??
?I?m not being paid, actually,? Alice replied, underlining an important passage for later. ?Not in money, at least. But it?s something much more valuable than that.?
?Valuable?? Marisa rubbed her hands together. ?Then you won?t mind if I-?
?Sorry, I?m not allowed to share it.? Alice shook a finger. ?Part of the contract. Hope you understand.?
?Boo.? Marisa pouted. ?You?re no fun, Alice.?
?I?ll take that as a compliment.?
Alice couldn?t hide the extra life in her voice. She?d slept soundly for a week now, and it felt like she?d been reborn. All she had to do was give some pointers three days a week, and she?d get all the slumberweed she?d ever need.
Her sleep was back to normal. She didn?t need to worry about her hard-made suit going unused. And most importantly, she?d screwed over that goddamn Lunarian.
?Haah...? Marisa yawned, pulling her hat down over her eyes. ?I think I?m gonna go take a nap. Was up late last night working on some new potions.?
?You do that,? Alice said with a smirk. ?I?ve got work to do.?