Maidens of the Kaleidoscope
~Hakurei Shrine~ => Touhou Addict Recovery Center => Topic started by: ?q on January 08, 2010, 06:29:36 PM
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Which of ZUN's creations do you find the strangest? I'm looking for the kinds of things that make you wonder just what ZUN was drinking when he came up with them. To jog your memory, I've listed a number of good candidates below.
Character design
*Five Magic Stones - a.k.a. "I couldn't think of a loli to put here"
*Kotohime - A princess who doesn't act like a princess who's a klepto Cop who attacks with magic carpets and--what!?
*Luize - An interdimensional demonic... tourist. Seriously.
*Rumia - A youkai who exudes darkness that she can't see through herself, so she's totally blind. Plus she looks like a young girl and eats people.
*Youmu - Half-human and half-ghost, half-dead and half-alive, half-phantom and half-reality, and altogether half-baked. Yet she has two swords.
*Yukari - A woman who attacks by shooting a slightly smaller mammal who attacks by shooting a slightly smaller mammal who attacks by shooting successively smaller mammals. ...well, okay, that's how it should be.
*Suika - The strongest and most feared creature of this eon. Also, a drunken loli. Also, a sadistic psychologist.
*Keine - A history teacher who happens to be a rare and wise mythical being - just not right now. Under the full moon she turns into GODCOW.
*Medicine - A doll who only ever thinks about poison and ruling the world.
*Komachi - Charon, of Greek mythology. Except a loli (sort of). And a massive slacker.
*Hina - How can you say no to that face?
*Kisume - BUCKET LOLI
*Parsee - Why is a Persian girl underground in the first place, never mind a Persian girl-turned-embodiment-of-envy-turned-bridge-troll?
*Iku - An oarfish loli who sold her personality to the Celestials in exchange for fashion sense. Acts like Thor-meets-Jane-Travolta.
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Danmaku design
*Meira - YES I LOVE HAVING BULLETS SPAWN RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME in a game where all bombs have to be pre-emptive. Also, her balls are small and unsatisfying compared to Reimu's.
*Five Magic Stones - Actually, more like one magic stone in charge of a battlestation.
*SoEW Marisa - Orreries Sun, anyone?
*Sara - RUN! There's a bullet on the bottom half of the screen!
*Yuki/Mai - Mmm, bad design.
*Meiling - So Patchy attacks with elements, Sakuya attacks with knives, Cirno attacks with ice, Meiling attacks with... colors?
*Sakuya - YES I LOVE CLAUSTROPHOBIC RANDOM KNIVES with terrible hitboxes
*Flandre - I'm actually not a psychotic killer; most of my attacks actually reflect that I'm kind of bored.
*Reisen - My special power actually takes away bullet bullets' hitboxes :o
*Hina - The leader of a Nagashi-hina army, who doesn't actually use any of them in battle...
*Parsee - The bullets I shoot are actually the least threatening things about me!
*Utsuho - FACE-MELTING SUNMAKU
*Koishi - Freud was right. Just admit it.
*Ichirin - A NECK? NO, UNDER UNZAN'S CHIN IS ANOTHER FIST
*Shou - Curvy lasers EVERYWHERE omg omg omg
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Music (whether the tune itself or just its name)
*The Aggressive Girl's Visionary Dream (The Tank Girl's Dream) - Worst song EVER.
*Mystic Oriental Love Consultation - Always a great thing to say around people who don't know anything except that Touhou is full of little girls.
*BAD Apple!! - How can you dislike a title like this?
*Lunar Clock ~ Luna Dial - Admit it, you disliked this song at some point.
*Crystallized Silver - See previous entry.
*Because the Rice Paddy Goddess is Scolding Me - Even if it is a mistranslation and the song is lame, how can you argue against this?
*Night Falls ~ Evening Star (SWR version) - The accordionist has gone insane. Please send help.
*Corpse Voyage ~ Be of Good Cheer! - Yeah, right.
*UFO Romance in the Night Sky - Synthesized laughter, okay. Synthesized squeaks, no.
*Future Universe of Wheelchair - I guess this is one way to credit Stephen Hawking.
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Strangest of the Strange for each of these categories:
Parsee
Parsee again
Night Falls ~ Evening Star
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Character: Nitori, simply for the 'Hey there's an ene....where did she go?'-introduction
Danmaku: Can't decide between Anchors and Brofists, they're both (0_o)-bullets
Music: 'The Maid and the Pocket Watch of Blood', I have seen neither the watch nor the blood yet
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Oh right, I left something off
The game title "Mystic Square" - The games with names like "Undefined Fantastic Object" and "Immaterial and Missing Power" make sense. The shortest name in the series "Mystic Square" doesn't seem to have anything to do with anything in the game.
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In the character design I have to say Kisume. A mid-boss in a bucket was the biggest WTF moment I had in a Touhou game.
Danmaku design, well IN's Marisa. I love being walled to death by TINY STARS.
Ichirin, for the cloud fists and the fucking pink bullets raining down.
Shou, for CURVING LASERS FDSFSDG
Mokou, because she shoots PHOENIXES at me.
Meiling for being fun and COLOURFUL, characteristics reserved usually for Extra stages.
Music:
Solar sect of Mystic wisdom - Nuclear Fusion, for me not being able to make sense of the first part, also because of the discordant piano tune at the beginning. It's awesome, though.
Extend ash - hourai victim, title makes no sense.
Candid friend, bonus because Nitori shoots syncing up with the beat.
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Actually, what about Spellcard names? There are some weird ones there as well. I'm always laughing about 'Monster Cucumber'.
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Embers of love.
Really, what was he thinking?
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I don't have time to do this at the moment, so for now I'll just say one thing:
SoEW stage 3 midbosses. SPIDERS. PUNCH 'EM.
POW POW POW.
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I'm always laughing about 'Monster Cucumber'.
What, no laughter at "Exteeeending Aaaaarm"?
As for strangest danmaku design, I humbly submit Elly's. Her danmaku is simplicity itself, but thanks to lol PC-98 graphics, no one ever sees her scythe coming through the danmaku at them. Also, I would like to give the tiles right before Elly an honorable mention. Those stupid tiles last about a minute or so and they always take away valuable bombs (or worse, lives) that would have been put to better use against Elly herself.
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What, no laughter at "Exteeeending Aaaaarm"?
Ah, that's the Hard-version, right? I only play Easy and barely Normal, so I didn't see that one yet.
But yep, it's worth a laugh :D
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On the subject of Nitori, "Super Youkai Warhead" just oozes awesome
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touhou
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Yuugi for character design. She looks nothing like an Oni - at least Suika has the two horns. She'd be better off as a unicorn youkai. Also, Yuugi's skin is almost disturbingly pale.
Brofist for danmaku. I've yet to play UFO, but this kind of large sprite bullet doesn't sit too well with me.
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Design.
...Hmm.
Rin Satsuki. I mean what was he THINKING. :V
Danmaku? Tie between Sanae and Nitori. Nitori for jesus I could -sleep- through her attacks. Sanae for well. Danmaku Stars, No, Not the ones we know, made with regular bullets!!!
Runner up to Aya. I love the fight sans illusionary bullshit, but how do you get that from AYA?
Song...
Hiroari Shoots a Bird. I know theres a long story tied to the meaning, But jesus, I expected more swords from the gardener.
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I loled at your character descriptions.
Design :
- Tewi Inaba in IN. Twisted ankles etc.
- MoF Zombie Reimu.
Spellcards :
- Blue Sign "Benevolent Orlean Dolls". And then she shoots white, red and green danmaku at me.
- Profound Field "Phantasm, Foam, Shadow". What does it mean ?
- "Imperishable Shooting". The shooting doesn't stop, but there isn't any shooting in this attack - ZUN.
- "Terrifying Hypnotism". Completely failed to hypnotize me.
- "Hello Forgotten World". ... what ?
- BROFISTS and Sunmaku. Their hitboxes are 1/4 the screen size.
- "Mystic Fragrance of a Makai Butterfly" (Normal) vs. "Magic Butterfly" (Lunatic).
- "Star Maelstrom" (Normal) vs. "Magic Milky Way" (Lunatic).
- "St. Nikou's Air Scroll" (Normal) vs. Superhuman "Byakuren Hijiri" (Lunatic).
- "Flying Fantastica" (Normal) vs. "Legendary Flying Saucer" (Lunatic).
Something is horribly wrong here.
Music :
- Locked Girl ~ Girl's Secret Room. Uhh ... secret ? And the tune is bad.
- Lunar Clock ~ Luna Dial. Horrible all-around.
- Memory of Forgathering Dream and Memory of Forgathering Oriental Dream are two separate songs ?
- U.N. Owen Was ... what ?
- Future Universe of Wheelchair. Weird name for an incredibly awesome song.
- G Free. *cough*Half-Life*cough cough*
Game title :
- Phantasmagoria of Dim.Dream.
- Scarlet Weather Rhapsody.
- Undefined Fantastic Object. Of course it grew on me, but ZUN could just use Star Lotus Ship.
- Unthinkable Natural Law. And OMG there's a SIXTH kanji in its name.
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Design:
i prefer the design of the girls in the fighting games, but it's true zuns art got better
in pofv i think nearly every picture is kind of messed up *take cover*
Spellcard
Shou, for CURVING LASERS FDSFSDG
the hell i am not capable of avoiding them, no chance even on easy^^
Okuu's gigantic bullets are great^^
Musik:
Yukari's Theme - Necrofantasia
Utsuho Reiuji's Theme - Solar Sect of Mystic Wisdom ~ Nuclear Fusion
Marisa's Theme - Love-coloured Master Spark (IN)
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Design: Ichirin and Unzan. A girl dressed like a nun, followed around by a gigantic cloud spirit who takes the form of an old man's head and throws fist shaped projectiles? What?
Danmaku: UFO everything <_< >_> *shot repeatedly* But seriously, the majority of the danmaku feels like it's intended to kill you... As in, you, the player. Cause so much rage that you hurl your head out the window :V
Music:
Not entirely sure what to go with on this one =/
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Design: Every PC-98 midboss. :V
Danmaku: Anchors made me wtf hard.
Music: Crimson Dead. Why ZUN would replace a theme with a couple looping notes is beyond me.
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Those rocks in SA stage 1 were pretty funny, considering it's about the only instance in the series of an environment-based obstacle, yet it lasts all of two seconds. Needs moar invisible blocks.
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This made me laugh hard enough to have to pause the game:
(http://i47.tinypic.com/291gr3a.jpg)
I mean, if I were a Touhou stage boss - replete with some awesome look, kick-ass danmaku and a great theme song - I'd probably still make an introduction like this. "Tada!"
This admittedly wasn't so much "what was ZUN thinking?" as it was "oh my god I would totally do that if I were Rin".
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Patchouli rating things on a 96 scale because it's both divisible by 2 and 3. Why does that matter?
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I think he was sober when he thought of the giant catfish
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Reisen's danmaku is... well, the bullets dodge you instead of you dodging the bullets. (At least in normal they do.) Also, Final Spark. Because Master Spark isn't enough.