|~Hakurei Shrine~ > Patchouli's Scarlet Library|
|Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!|
|(1/100) > >>|
|Dead Princess Sakana:
There are times when you want have an idea to write something, but are not sure.
When you want to know whether an idea or outline is any good, or need help fleshing it out.
I'm sure every writer has experienced that before.
So, since we had a number of topics with only outlines created that were too big for Koakuma's Parlour but didn't quite fit in anywhere else,
enjoy the newly created Aya's Writing Workshop, inspired by Tengukami.
In here all the previous topics on story outlines have been merged together,
and everyone is welcome to present and discuss outlines and ideas here.
I'm sure us amateur writers have lots thing in our heads, but for some reason we couldn't finish our dreams and let them rot in a dark dark place.
Isn't it sad? I mean, it maybe cos of laziness, or some private reason we'd never share, but it's rude to left our ideas like that.
So I make this topic, so people can share their outlines, or unfinished fiction and perhaps someone may want to continue the work. This is like the opposite of the "Request thread" outside, because some outline may ends up in a huge book.
Because you're putting the whole outline here, make sure to put it in spoiler, a brief summary is needed.
Anyway, not sure if the topic is accepted, before Ruro or any higher-ups decide this topic's fate, I'll let mine here.
You know, it's the original Touhou Dark War: Gensokyo is dying, Yukari decided to make a game, where everyone fight each others to death with Mokou, Kaguya, Eirin as supervisors, due to their immortality. However, the cruelty of the youkai is out of control, and something weird is happening afoot.
Spoiler: Day 1:
Yukari invited the elite-tier people to the Mt. Youkai to announce the game.
Aya was found dead in the Bamboo Forest, Remilia was suspected by Eirin.
Kaguya and Eirin went to SDM, and witnessed Meiling's death. Patchouly said they're being attacked by the Yakumo.
Remilia, Flandre, Sakuya found dead, the SDM disappeared and Patchouly was nowhere to be found.
Kaguya and Eirin went to the Hakurei Shrine and informed that they're going to fight against the Moriya.
Eientei was attacked by Momiji, Tewi was confused by the Lunatic Eyes and killed Reisen, and ran off.
Kaguya found Tewi and Mokou, found out Tewi was leading the youkai to attack the Human Village, resulted in Keine's death. Mokou was furious and led Momiji to Eientei.
After the talk, Mokou fought Kaguya and accidentally killed Tewi.
Mokou told Eirin that Akyuu asked them to be the next history recorder before passed away.
Kaguya suffered a great shock after Tewi's death, but still went to Hakurei Shrine.
The Moriya Shrine had Yuugi as their partner, who killed Suika in a fierce 1-on-1 battle.
Kanako killed Marisa after the witch blew Sanae away with her Master Spark.
Reimu was crushed under the steel Onbashira, and Alice was wrapped by Suwako to death.
Mokou joined force with Kaguya and Eirin, wishing to end the war.
They went to the forest under the Youkai Mountain and found the Aku sisters, Hina and Nitori dead.
Kaguya's group met the mourning goddesses, and learnt they wanted to give up.
Kaguya's group and Yuugi fought the goddesses, and Yuugi killed them both.
Eirin thought it's strange for Yuugi to be so bloodthirsty, she and her group secretly follow the oni to the Garden of the Sun.
Here, Yuugi got killed by Yuuka. Before death, Yuugi told everyone that Yukari was holding Satori hostage, and more will come for Yuuka's life.
Yuuka nearly got killed by Utsuho, but Koishi appeared and stopped the bird.
Yukari complained via a gap and burnt Rin alive infront of everyone.
Utsuho got killed by Yuuka before she could do the same.
Kaguya's group went to Mugenkan, joining with Yuuka to fight against Yukari.
Tenshi and Iku appeared in the Hakurei Shrine and found something was still alive in the shrine.
However, before doing anything they were killed by Yukari herself.
Ran asked the Mugenkan group to have the last battle on Youkai Mountain's Peak. She was spared by Eirin after a fight with Mokou.
Yukari escorted Patchouli to a sealed cave, had the witch unseal it and killed her.
Kaguya's group and Yuuka went to the mountain, found an ambush led by Byakuren. The monk was persuaded by Yukari.
Murasa killed Koishi before got butchered by Yuuka, Mokou managed to burn Narzin to ashes but cannot defeat Shou.
Yuuka killed Ichirin and Nue before Byakuren sent her flying out the mountain, making a human-shaped tunnel through the rocks.
Yukari revealed her plan: to awake the Dragon God to break the 4th wall, so she can finally free from ZUN's world.
Mokou, Kaguya were defeated badly, and Byakuren, Shou were killed by the Great Youkai Sage.
Eirin ran to Hakurei Shrine, killed Ran and Chen to release the evil soul of this shrine: Mima.
Mima sent Eirin back to the Youkai Mountain, where Yukari was, and she herself ran off to revive Yuuka.
Yuuka was revived as her strongest self, long hair, winged, everything and rushed to face Yukari.
Eirin didn't fight as she was busy healing her princess. However, Yukari didn't mind, she was waiting for Yuuka.
The two strongest youkai fought from dawn to sunset, with the opponent's heart in her hand, Yukari was now the best of Gensokyo.
Eirin, Kaguya, Mokou fought the tired Yukari, chased her to the foot of the mountain.
Mima appeared, but before she can avenge her students, Yuyuko and Youmu saved Yukari.
Youmu died from the injuries. The duo was chased down again, this time to the Sanzu river.
Shikieiki appeared, and Yukari used Mima's sins to persuade the Judge.
Mima killed Komachi, and was sent to Hell by Shikieiki.
Before Shikieiki judged Yukari, the Dragon God awaken from the blood of the Gensokyo's citizens.
Yuyuko attacked Shikieiki, while Yukari gapped herself to the Dragon.
THIS world was no more./Your ending.
Are you allowed to change a few things about the main story? Because sweet Shinki the amount of 'Did Not Do The Research' in this is almost painful.
Spoiler: - Gods can't die. They revive every time they get 'slain'. They can only die when no one believes in them anymore, so for Yuugi to kill the deities she had to kill everyone in Gensokyo first.
- Celestials can't permanently die either. They are already dead. 'Spirit' celestials use host to interact with the plain of the living. If you destroy the host nothing happens to the spirit celestial. 'Corporeal' celestials (like Tenshi) have bodies and can be 'killed', but when they are sent to Sanzu they beat the ever loving shit out of the shinigami and then frolic back to Heaven like nothing happened. However, with Yukari's gaphax you can never be sure, so maybe this one is justified.
- Shinigami, as DEATH GODS, obviously can't die either. That would be a paradox. And even if she was killed, where would she end up? Sanzu River of course! In the words of South Park: "Where did you think I would end up? Detroit?"
- Reimu cannot be defeated in combat. Thanks to her ability to 'float between dimensions' she can effectively become invincible. Moriya doesn't stand a chance against her. They would basically hit nothing but thin air. The battle would go on forever. And when Reimu dies the Hakurei Border would break, which would release the youkai. If Yukari really wanted to be free she could have just killed Reimu with gaphax instead of slaughtering everybody. If however the world of Gensokyo is a 'game world' Yukari could just use the 'border of fiction and reality' to jump out of ZUN's computer and become real. There is actually no need for Yukari to do all this.
- Eirin isn't immortal. Inaba of the Moon/Earth confirmed this when Eirin saw a bit of the afterlife when she got strangled by Kaguya with a leek.
I would suggest that anyone who plans to write this to take the above points in account and avoid plotholes. Before you start on this I would suggest to thoroughly research Gensokyo and its inhabitants.
To be fair, if anyone can kill a god the old fashioned way, it'd be one of the 4 devas.
Also Reimu gets beaten in IN and in 12.3. And in SWR.
- The Moriya's life is the faith of the Youkai Mountain's area, which was wiped out completely by the fight of Nitori vs Hina and when Yuugi rampaged there.
- Yukari can kill the spirits of the Celestial with her ability.
- Shikigami is death, but they can "disappear" by getting blown by a great magic force.
- Reimu cannot use that skill whenever he wants, nor it is a passive skill. In a fight, things happen.
- Yukari needs to call the Dragon God. Since what Reimu is doing is MAINTAIN the boundary. Killing her MIGHT get the boundary collapse, but it's not what definitely happens.
- Seeing the afterlife doesn't mean you can die, also you shouldn't take that manga seriously. Or Kaguya really is a damn useless princess.
| Message Index|