Maidens of the Kaleidoscope
~Hakurei Shrine~ => Touhou Addict Recovery Center => Topic started by: ShouAmaterasu on July 12, 2011, 07:01:30 AM
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(The following is actually a joke and is not meant to be serious)
Toho, a game with little girls flying in a magical land... the sad part is that they use black magic and many of the characters are demons that look like little girls and have varied satanic powers at their disposal and have often encouraged children to drink alcohol under-aged. The main characters who are supposed to be the heroes aren't out of the clear either, the main character is a Shrine Maiden of Shinto Religion, which would surely lead our kids to stray from Christ, BUT IT GETS WORSE! The OTHER main character is a witch, yes, you heard me, A WITCH!...............
(THE FOLLOWING UNDER THIS SENTENCE IS THE IDEA OF DISCUSSION, THE ABOVE COMMENT WAS AN ATTEMPT TO PARODY THE IRRATIONAL MORAL GUARDIAN)
I'm very glad that Touhou is not so commercial that it attracts this breed of haters, because their insane troll logic drives them to think that even the most irrelevant things mean devil worship (even though some characters aren't that bashful about it, like Remilia, no pun intended, who likes crosses but is otherwise indifferent to religion period). At the same time, I get a good kick of laughter when I read stuff with these people obviously not having a clue what they are talking about, it's sort of that feeling of watching the Joker in Arkham Asylum kick a guard's crotch, it's painful to watch and you may feel hurt, but you can't help yourself but laugh at the sheer stupidity of it. Here's an example that I just read about on Poke'mon, revel in fear of the Metapod, the rarest and most powerful Poke'mons! http://shelleytherepublican.com/2006/10/01/pokemon-the-yellow-peril.aspx (btw, pardon my lack of knowledge, but could somebody tell me how they do that thing where the entire link is in one word?)
My main idea was something along the lines of creating a fake document that looks something like one of these moral guardians ranting about Touhou (in which it would be made VERY clear that that the whole thing is a big joke). Jokes of any particular characters acting like an over zealous moral guardian sounds fun too (Heck, I might be reading between the lines when I think of Marisa's statement on "Those Tablets").
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Shelley the Republican is a satire site.
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Reminds me of that Christian book about Pokemon.
"Moves used: Bite
Teaches kids how to: bite other people"
hahaha oh wow I'd like to see what Hyper Beam teaches them to do
I mean hey don't get me wrong, I'm a Christian, but ahahahahaha Bible-thumpers I don't even.
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Reminds me of that Christian book about Pokemon.
"Moves used: Bite
Teaches kids how to: bite other people"
Pokemon attacks don't kill people.
People kill people, with Pokemon attacks!
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Shelley the Republican is a satire site.
You know, I actually might have got some hint on that through the link I found it in. The link I found it in was on a page in TV tropes called "Everyone in Hell is the Devil" (with a picture of a wanted poster stating that the Devil and Santa Clause are long lost brothers or something), a page that talks about how people would take just about anything and demonize it without any real logical reason. When I was looking in the game section of this page, only Poke'mon and the Legacy of Kain were included, but the person posting the link to that site DID question whether it was really a crazy moral guardian or someone pulling off satire for the lulz.
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Reminds me of that Christian book about Pokemon.
"Moves used: Bite
Teaches kids how to: bite other people"
hahaha oh wow I'd like to see what Hyper Beam teaches them to do
I mean hey don't get me wrong, I'm a Christian, but ahahahahaha Bible-thumpers I don't even.
Pretty much my point of view in all this.
Though sadly I must say that Mom is one of those that demonize everything. Not so extremely, of course, but still.
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Back to the Touhou gag.... I think our biggest obstacle is finding which character would offend these high strung people the most (maybe all of them)? The Scarlet Devil Remilia Scarlet who is not only a vampre, but also uses blood to attack and rather enjoys crosses, Yuyuko for simply being a ghost (yes they are pretty high strung on their idea that there are no such things as ghosts of the deceased and that they are actually demons from hell), Utsuho for her manipulation of Nuclear Fusion (EVEN YUKARI SAYS IT'S EVIL), Reimu/Sanae for being shinto and not following Christ, even worse one of the god's Sanae follows actually wants advances in tech, Shinki because she is the creator of Makai the demon world (not to mention six wings of evil), Sariel the fallen angel of death, Marisa and Alice for being witches, Byakuren for being a witch + she and her entire crew are Buddhist, and Rumia.... just Rumia (I think I'll stop here, too much to type).
The best part about the joke is it actually being believable that some crazy puritan wrote it, but thanks to some notations and warnings before and after reading, it should be clear that this whole thing was a parody.
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No dude, telling people that it's a joke ruins the whole thing. Just look at the Onion; they don't have a disclaimer before each article that says "By the way, this is a joke."
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So are these "moral guardians" entertaining to me? Hell no. They are completely rejecting reason and acting stupidly as a result. And I don't like being reminded of how idiotic people can be. I know the OP is a joke, at least.
As for who would piss them off the most? Perhaps a magician like Byakuren, someone who gave up her humanity for what were, at the time, selfish reasons. Plus the fact that she had Buddhist origins and wouldn't be following Christ as the "moral guardians" would want everyone to.
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I love messing with my GFs mind. She's a die-hard Puritan and is very impressionable
(I was making some of this up, because I knew she would never play the game anyway)
Me: You know that Touhou game? You know that most of the characters are demons that take the form of cute girls and one of the main characters could turn into a demon to gain more power?
Torok: OMG, that's just Anti-Christian!!!
Me: Well yeah, but it has a lot of Christian themes in it. Like the setting being heaven and many of the villains turn good when they're defeated (Converted)
Torok: Oh, ok, that's ok then.
Me: Oh, did I mention the main villain is the devil?
Torok: :O
She's a real dunce sometimes.
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On an unrelated note, to make a URL into a single word, use this syntax, without the quotes:
[ "url=<your url here>"] WORD["/url"]
Replace <your url here> with the url you're linking to. WORD, of course, becomes whatever text you wish to display.
That being said, the entertainment value of the moral guardian depends on the individual guardian. For example, I've heard stories of moral guardians taking various card games and making "Christian versions" of them, but then they wind up focusing more on the morality than the mechanics of the game. This is highly entertaining. Other times, they just show up and ruin a good time.
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^ That's exactly why I kicked up a major stink when somebody suggested they should make an educational version of Portal.
GLaDOS, being one of my favourite female characters of all time, would just be ravaged by hippie teachers. I don't even want to think about what she would become after they were done with her.
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I don't have anything against religion (though I have my own diverse beliefs on God and such, but I digress), but it's when people try to push it into everything that makes me hate it to an extent. We can't even enjoy a simple game because people go "ANTI-CHRIST" at every single friggin' thing. It boils down to "stop having fun with things that aren't Jesus, guys."
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I don't have anything against religion (though I have my own diverse beliefs on God and such, but I digress), but it's when people try to push it into everything that makes me hate it to an extent. We can't even enjoy a simple game because people go "ANTI-CHRIST" at every single friggin' thing. It boils down to "stop having fun with things that aren't Jesus, guys."
That's pretty much how we all feel. Thankfully, those people (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/VocalMinority) are rare.
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The little humor I find in Moral Guardians is exceedingly black, because often they actually get their way and retarded and outrageous things happen.