The Enchanted Diary

[Blackraptor]

If she pulls this off...the MaLice cannon might not be far away.

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 98:

I went to Patchouli's library today to see if I could find anything about how to convert Love to Magic, or anything close at all. I have a good stack of books on the subject, so that will surely occupy a good number of hours with research.

I was looking at the doll that Marisa gave me, and I still can't believe she'd do such a thing for me. I didn't even know that Marisa knew HOW to make dolls. Then again, I guess she's probably snuck into my house more than once without my knowledge, so she might have picked up a few diagrams or something to help her. I don't mind even if she did, this product is amazing.

Entry 99:

I continue to research how to convert Love to Magic, and all the while I can't get my mind off of Marisa. I'm going to let this be, though, because I don't mind the love. It makes me feel amazing, to think of her, even if I don't straight out tell her all the time.

I sent Shanghai to her house today to bring her a note, in which I wrote that I was sorry for not visiting in a few days because I was busy. When I got her back, all that Marisa wrote back was "it's k". How like her.

I'm getting no closer to my goal in my project, but I still have a lot of reading to do.

Entry 100:

I've begun to notice how used this book looks. I've really taken a liking to it, haven't I? It's been 100 days since I found it in Patchouli's library, and quite a lot has happened since then. I've confessed my feelings for Marisa, and that is by far the biggest event written in these pages.

I feel as if this book is somewhat of a Grimoire to my heart...Yes, actually, this is perfect. I already own my Grimoire, however, this particular book may in fact be the key I need to activate the reactions needed to create love-based Magic...I wonder if writing a few magical seals on the cover would do anything...

Perhaps it's not Marisa's Hakkero that creates the reactions, but simply a cannon of sorts that forms the conical shape of the Master Spark. That begs the question, though, what is it that she's drawing such a strong feeling from? I feel like it's been long enough, maybe I should go ask her again.

Entry 101:

Marisa is still being dodgy about where she's getting the love from. I guess it's just her nature to not like serious conversations like that, I should have expected it. Still, I can't help but wonder.

Before I headed to my house, I headed to the Shrine to talk with Reimu. I wanted to ask her if she had any clue about what Marisa could be using to create such a massive amount of Love in her heart, seeing how Reimu has been Marisa's friend for such a long time. She told me she didn't know, but (what I assumed was) jokingly told me that it was probably for trouble. Although funny, that hardly helps.

I've gotten a few leads on how to convert Love into Magic, and will test them out tomorrow.

Entry 102:

Well, that was a failure basically.

I managed to get a pathetic 3 bullets with about as much power as I could channel into a doll. The mechanism I put in it obviously is hardly efficient, with what I'm going to judge as a .0003% effectiveness rate. I'm hoping to get that to at least an 80% before I call the spell complete.

This kind of magic is baffling, it's like nothing I've done before. Still, it's an amazing experience, because at least I'm happy while trying to use the spells.

Entry 103:

I've gotten the efficiency rate to about .005%, but that's hardly anything. Perhaps I'm going about this wrong...I think I need an entirely new design of not only mechanism, but doll.

Other than my slow going work, Marisa was over at my house today for a bit. Seeing her renewed my zeal in trying to get this project off the ground; she's just so beautiful. It's hard to convey what I mean in writing, but seeing Marisa's shining eyes and beautiful smile is pure exhilaration at it's best. If only I could properly show her how I feel...

Entry 104:

I've found a solution. The doll Marisa made for me is the answer. I've noticed that in her design, what I would call a flaw previously is actually perfect for this project. I'm somewhat hesitant to alter it, however...I'm going to research a better way to convert Love into Magic, that way I can be 100% sure I know what I'm doing before I mess with the doll in any way, shape, or form. It'd be terrible if I just messed it up irreversibly, Marisa would probably be crushed that I would do such a thing to our symbol of friendship.

Now that I think about it, I wonder what she's done with the doll I made for her...

Entry 105:

I went to Marisa's house to try and find her, but she wasn't there, so I ended up finding her at the Shrine. I kinda lost the nerve to ask her what she did with the doll in front of Reimu, so we just ended up having tea together. I know Marisa thinks of me as a friend, but I wonder if she finds me annoying. It's possible considering she knows how I feel, and I do tend to visit her quite frequently as of late.

I say this because we got into somewhat of a fight, because Marisa told me that I tend to go see her a lot, and I'm probably being a lovestruck slacker. The way she said it was so taunting, I couldn't help but get mad at her. Reimu found the whole ordeal funny, which didn't help.

I'm not really mad at her though, even though I yelled. I should probably apologize.

Entry 106:

I was in the middle of baking some cookies for Marisa, when she showed up at my house and told me she was sorry for poking at me like that. I told her it was ok, and made some tea for the two of us. She seemed surprised that I served her with a smile so quickly, almost as if she expected me to be mad for longer.

I kinda deflected the thought from her, telling her that I was already in the middle of making the cookies to simply get my mind off of things. I don't want to come off as obsessed with her, so if she thinks I was doing it before she came into the question, then maybe she'll just think I'm friendly for sharing.

She said they were good though...♥~

Entry 107

I think I have a good design for my Love Converter completed. I've been spending the past few days on it, and it's definitely powerful. The technicalities behind it are written in my work journals, and are too complicated to put here without wasting a good number of pages. However, I will note that the mechanism is very reactive to two things: Emotion, and a new spell I've been working on.

I plan on testing this theory tomorrow, it's dark right now and not really a good idea to be blasting things out in the cold forest without knowing what I'm doing.

Entry 108:

The converter was a success!! I reaped a resounding 47.32% from the mechanism alone, and that was without the doll being in possession of it. I predict that if I'm in control of the doll Marisa made for me, then the love embedded in the doll itsself will act as an amplifier, as well as provide a source of Love for me to work off of, which should in theory boost the rate to my desired 80%.

I've been really bugged lately, though, about where Marisa gets her power source from. There's something more than just her Hakkero and Magical abilities fueling her Master Sparks, there has to be.

[Sect]

Evil theory: Marisa powers her Master Spark through the love that OTHERS have for her when she manipulates their feelings for her and built her Hakkero using cannibalized parts of heartfelt gifts that the girls give her. Reimu and Patchy have already fallen, Alice, and they're trying to warn you!

[Blackraptor]

Clearly, Marisa has a Star Sapphire battery hidden somewhere. That is where she gets all that love from!

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 109:

I've decided to change the design of the converter to a necklace for the doll instead of something that goes inside. That way, if I mess up, I can simply take it off the doll. I don't know why I didn't think of this before, but I'm glad I thought of it now at least. I'll make it look like a heart shaped pendant - that'll be very fitting, considering it's purpose.

I'm looking at the doll right now, and the smile that Marisa gave it is somewhat comforting everytime I see it. Seeing myself happy like that makes it true, considering I know Marisa still cares about me. That girl...Whatever she does always ends up in me being happy, even if I'm initially mad. I wish I could make her as happy as she makes me...

Entry 110:

I think I've overdone it a bit.

I was trying to test out my new spell, and I accidentally felled a few trees in the process. The crashes were so loud, and there was so much Danmaku, I couldn't believe it. Having that sort of power is something I haven't been able to do since my last duel with Marisa in Makai...It's amazing. It was as if I was on top of the world, nothing could have stopped me in that moment of swirling pleasure and passion, of sheer beauty and finesse.

I don't even want to begin to rate that kind of feeling, I feel it's very complete. It's not something I could rate, anyway, because I feel as if it could get much more powerful if Marisa were at my side while I'm performing the new spells...

I've decided to call this technique Love Sign: "Unbridled Passion". I think that name is fitting, considering the sheer amazingness of this entire experience.

Entry 111:

Marisa came over today, because she wanted to check out what caused the trees to fall. I guess she didn't come over yesterday, considering I was antsy and tried the spell out at night. After she learned it was me, she seemed surprised at first, but happy that I'd gotten a new spell to work. I couldn't tell her how I did it, though, because I feel as if it's too early. Besides, there's one more spell I want to get to work before I can call this project complete.

I've been trying to not show my love to her as much, considering how she feels about me. I don't know if I'm overdoing it, though, because sometimes I feel as if I'm being a little harsh on her. Marisa doesn't seem to mind, she just probably thinks that's how I am. I'm only not trying to overload her with love, because I know she wouldn't appreciate that.

I know you won't read this (then again...) Marisa, but I'm sorry if I'm mean to you sometimes. It's because I love you, and I don't know how to properly express it without coming across as creepy.

Entry 112:

I felt bad for acting cold toward Marisa yesterday, even if it was only in the way I reacted to her, meaning I didn't act super happy and lovestruck like I usually do. In fact, I've been doing that for a few days, weeks maybe, now that I think about it. I'm just bad at trying to deal with my intense emotions, which I guess is what fueled the start of Project Aishiteru. Anyway, I felt bad so I went over to Marisa's and told her exactly that, that I'm bad at expressing my emotions.

The reaction I got somewhat surprised me. I expected her to be a little weirded out, and subconsciously I expected her to tell me everything was going to be ok. Yet, she did neither and opted for avoiding my apology in a way. I don't understand why, but she just kinda seemed to brush it off and change the subject. I shouldn't read too much into it though - Knowing Marisa, she just had something on her mind, and didn't feel like talking too much. It happens to all of us, so there's no need to worry.

Entry 113:

I think I've finally done it. And to test it, I did what any reasonable person here in Gensokyo would do - get into a friendly duel.

I went to Patchouli's library today to break the news of my new spells. I asked Patchouli if she would personally be the one to experience them for the first time, and she accepted, saying she wanted to test out some of her own spells as well. I warmed up with a few of my older spellcards, but when I had gotten to Unbridled Passion, even Patchouli was amazed at the amount of power I had suddenly thrown out. I even broke through some of her tougher spells with my own before I was forced into a Spell Break. However, this isn't the important part of this little story.

The important part is that I have finished my ultimate spell for this project, and I won the duel with it.

The feeling of love and power surging through me, the rush of a thousand beautifully colored bullets, the thrill of pushing forth my deepest passions, the determination of knowing it was all for her...The sheer greatness of casting that spell is indescribable in words. This must be how Marisa feels when she uses her Master Spark, or even her Final Spark...

I have named this card simply "Marisa Kirisame". That, in itsself, is the most beautiful and meaningful name I can think of.

Entry 114:

This doll...I'm extremely glad I have it. I love this doll, for the extreme amount of sentimental value within it is literally priceless.

I wonder how long it took Marisa to create her Master Spark spell...I wonder this because, for some reason, project Aishiteru didn't seem to take as long as I thought it would. Then again, Marisa is human, so perhaps as one of her original spellcards, it must have taken a while for her to make. Overall though, she did an amazing job, considering it's still effective to this day.

This again brings me back to the question, though, of where Marisa could be drawing all her power from. In it's most powerful form, her love based magic far surpasses mine, or at least it seems that it does. Maybe it's just the fact that she's perfected it over the years, and she has a much higher efficiency rate than I do.

It's still a mystery on how she has that kind of power in such extreme amounts, though.

Entry 115:

I went to Marisa's house today in hopes of showing her my new spells. She wasn't there, though, so I went to the Shrine, because that's about the only other place she'd spend any good amount of time, besides my house I guess. Sure enough, she was there, but it was strange. As soon as I got there, she seemed like she had to leave in a hasty fashion. Reimu didn't seem to know why, so I'm still confused.

Perhaps another day.

Entry 116:

Marisa came to my house today, and asked me very bluntly if I still loved her. I was extremely hesitant to tell her yes, however, because the way she asked me made it sound as if it were a bad thing. So, I just told her that I don't love her enough to think of her night and day, and I think that did the trick. It was a bit of a lie, though, so I hope I didn't tell her anything that would ruin any chances I have with her...In fact, she's not really the kind to want to have a passionate love at first anyway, so it probably was a better choice.

She seemed relieved after I told her that, and I asked what was wrong, because she was acting somewhat weird. She told me it was nothing and regained her usual composure, ate my food, and left.

What a weirdo. A weirdo that I love, but still a weirdo.

Entry 117:

Well, I know where Marisa is drawing all her love from now.

Reimu.

Guess I have no use for these damned cards anymore.

Why do I even bother.

[Sect]

[Ryuu]

the implications of this development excite me

[Blackraptor]

Alice...in order for you to overcome this, you need to ask yourself:

"What would Dr. Gordon Freeman do?"

Spoiler:

I wonder what the chances are for an AlicexPatchy end? Either that or Alice going Yandere or possible NTR-ing Marisa from Reimu.

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 118:

I'm not mad. I'm happy for her. I'm happy that Marisa could find such a person that she feels loving thoughts for.

Absolutely. Not.

I can't deal with this. It seems that ever since I said those stupid three words about Marisa, nothing but anguish has become of me. Why am I condemned to these kind of thoughts, this lifestyle? And I had to find out the worst way, too.

I was over at the Shrine yesterday, and I walked into seeing them....together. I'm not even going to bother writing the word. But it was painfully obvious. I mean, nobody presses their face to anyone else like that unless it's true.

I'm at a loss of rational thought here.

Entry 119:

Yet again, the world is gray, and I cannot taste the food I eat. I'm just dredging through life, yet again, and I can't see the point in continuing on. Again.

I must be a masochist or something if I'm going to continue to get hurt, and still continue on my way. I mean...it's really hard to put this into words and feel as if I'm in the right. But despite the fact that Marisa and Reimu like eachother...I still care about Marisa. No matter what happens, I'll always care about her somewhere in my heart...

I'm an idiot.

Entry 120:

Marisa came over to my house. Oh how bittersweet.

She wanted to apologize to me for what I had seen, and her rationale for coming so many days afterward was that she wanted me to cool down. Well, how dead you're wrong, Marisa, considering I'd "cool down" in about a few hundred years at this rate.

She seemed sorry enough, but I asked her outright if she was happy with Reimu. She looked really torn on how to answer, which means I know the answer.

I couldn't sit there with her in my house, knowing what she's done so shamelessly, not thinking once about my feelings. I can hardly sit with myself...

Entry 121:

I haven't touched the doll Marisa gave me since I learned about her and Reimu. I can hardly even look at it.

It's saddening, thinking about how happy it made me just a few days ago, and yet suddenly I'm snapped into this kind of situation. Fate really loves to piss me off, doesn't it? Because I certainly think that I'm cursed or something. Maybe one of the times I was at the Mansion, Remilia altered my fate for the worse. If so, what a bitch.

Either that, or I'm just unlucky. Very unlucky. Where's Tewi when you need her?

I want to die.

Entry 122:

Reimu made a personal appearance at my house. If it weren't for the fact that I still respect Marisa, I would have ran her through with the nearest sharp object on sight.

What am I saying...Reimu isn't a bad person. I know she's not, because not only of how much she cares about Gensokyo, but because Marisa wouldn't choose just any girl to set her heart with...

Reimu wanted to apologize for what I had to see, and she seemed to do a better job than Marisa. It might be due to the fact that I couldn't think straight with Marisa at all, but at least Reimu was somewhat better at it. We had a long talk about Marisa, and love. It was really comforting, in a sense. I don't know what about it, but getting so many repressed feelings out of my system kinda helped.

And yet, at the same time, I know I was speaking to my competitor. My nemesis in a sense. She's most likely the biggest reason that Marisa doesn't like me, and although I don't blame Marisa, I don't know if Reimu is quite up to the job. It might just be me, but during our conversation, it didn't seem like Reimu cared about Marisa at all as much as I do...

Entry 123:

I'll be blatantly honest. I spent most of today wishing I could cry, but not finding the heart to, even in my own house. It's hard living with yourself, knowing you're a failure.

I shouldn't be this depressed. I should be happy for Marisa and Reimu. And yet...it's as if I should be stopping them. Marisa deserves only the best, because she's worth it. Reimu may be powerful, but loving? People always described her as being indifferent toward people, not caring who they are, and treating everybody equally. Which, in a sense, is good, but at the same time, that means she never plays favorites either.

What would Reimu do if faced in a situation where she's tempted by another girl? Would she stick by Marisa's side? Break it off with Marisa just to be with this new girl? Cheat?

I need to stop myself before I work myself up even more...

Entry 124:

Marisa came over again today. She apparently thinks we can still be normal friends after what happened...I wish it was that easy.

She tried to act as if everything was cool, but it's NOT. I love seeing her, but knowing how she just kinda is trampling my feelings like that is...I don't even know.

I've never before had such a mixture of pure joy and vile hatred at once.

Entry 125:

I'm going to calm myself down and apologize to Marisa tomorrow. I'm going to tell her that I'm happy for her, and that she should be happy with Reimu. I have no business caring about what they want to do, it's their lives.

I'll still love you, though, Marisa...

Entry 126:

I told her, in essence, the same thing I said I would yesterday. I said that she should be happy, and that I'm happy for her. And you know what she said?

"Don't be a liar. You're bad at it."

She's right, but damn her for ever telling me that to my face. She really needs to stop just pushing my heart around like a toy, she needs to realize how much this hurts me inside...

I know she's a good person, and she means no harm, but I have feelings as much as any person would. I can be hurt, and I'm not going to take everything with a smile like she can. It just can't be done.

Marisa told me she was sorry again, though, to try and help my mood. It didn't really work, to say the least. All she managed to do was explain how Reimu was such a good girlfriend, and failed to mention anything I do for her. All she told me was that things weren't meant to be, at least for the moment. Which basically translates to "Alice, nice try, but you're not good enough. Reimu's my love, and you never will be."

Such a direct insult to me shouldn't be tolerated. And yet, I know she didn't mean any harm. I hate this feeling. I hate to love her, and love to hate her. And yet, I love her with all my heart, and hate how she treats me.

I'm so screwed up.

Entry 127:

I tried to see if I could recapture the moments that I experienced with my new spellcards. Needless to say, I failed miserably. I can't even cast a single one in this state.

This doesn't mean I don't love Marisa, I just can't capture that love like I was able to before. I'm so lost in my own heart, it's amazing I haven't killed myself yet. It really is. In fact, I've considered it a few times.

Not like anybody would care. I'm just Alice. To Patchouli, she'd only lose an occasional bother to her work. To Reimu, she'd lose her competition. To Marisa...

Marisa would lose a pathetic, sniveling, love struck puppy who won't leave her alone. A fool who can't even think correctly to save her life, that hopes blindly and doesn't listen to logic. An idiot who does nothing but intrude upon her own personal life and wonder why she isn't loved.

And yet, after I say all that, I still wish for her.

Nobody would miss me.

Entry 128:

I really, really need to stop thinking depressing thoughts. I can't live like this, I have to think proactively. So let's pose a question:

What can I do to solve this problem?

...What is the problem?

Problem: I love Marisa, Marisa doesn't love me. Marisa loves Reimu. I want Marisa. I want to show her how much I care. I want her to only have the best, to be cared about like she should be cared about. I'm unable to achieve this goal, because Marisa is only willing to accept that sort of treatment from Reimu. Reimu, up until this point, has not given her what she deserves.

Solution: Fix or get rid of Reimu.

[Blackraptor]

Seo Kouji, is that you?

I have a very bad feeling about this...

[Landon]

Solution: Fix or get rid of Reimu.

I like this solution.

[Marin The Magus]

Solution: Fix or get rid of Reimu.

Alice, you should ask advice from Flandre... Or better, her assistance in doing that xD
And don't worry, if what you observe is true, if it's not pure jealousy, Marisa and Reimu will break up in any moment. And YOU'll be there for Marisa (Oh, how much I wish that would happen~ )

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 129:

I don't think my attempt to make Reimu see as I do worked.

I was over at the Shrine, and I asked her how much she loved Marisa. All she did was tell me not to worry, that she'd take good care of her. I kept persisting, trying to get her to prove in some way that she was fit for Marisa, but she kept just sweeping the front of her shrine, basically telling me not to think about it.

Eventually she told me to go away or else she'd make me, so I left, trying not to antagonize her too much. Is it so bad that I just care about Marisa? I mean, if anything I'd think it's sweet.

Then again, Reimu is the one with Marisa's heart...

Entry 130:

I tried a different tactic today. I went to Marisa's house and asked HER what Reimu does for her. It was basically as fruitful as asking Reimu, though, because Marisa, being the girl she is, saw right through me and knew what I was up to. She just told me to be at ease, to not worry about it, because she's her own person and will dump Reimu if things go wrong.

I trust in her to do just that, and yet I still think Marisa deserves more than I've seen Reimu give her. For instance, I've hardly seen them together since that day, and not to sound like a stalker, but I've been kinda keeping my eye out to see if Marisa leaves or if Reimu comes into the forest.

I'm just caring about Marisa...There's nothing wrong with that.

Entry 131:

Good old Marisa...She said she's felt like our friendship has started to break up, so she spent a good part of the day at my house today. It's almost as if things were back to what they were, except for the fact that I'm plagued by the constant thought that Marisa, at this point, will never love me. I don't know how many people have tried living like that, but it's hard.

I really enjoyed seeing her, though. Seeing her so happy, so energetic like she usually is. One thing did ruin it, however.

As it got later, she mentioned that she was going to go to the Shrine, obviously to be with Reimu. I told her goodbye, and to have fun. Although I said that with a smile, it felt as if I was giving away a piece of my soul. It hurt to know that she was leaving my house to be with Reimu like that, even though I'm the one who's cared about her since day 1. I doubt Reimu has felt anything like that for Marisa until just very recently, so it's probably premature and underdeveloped, which only leads to grief.

I don't want Marisa ending up hurt. I'll be damned if she does.

Entry 132:

I went to Patchouli's library again today to return a few books, borrow a few others, and ask her opinion on Reimu. All she said was that she could care less about Marisa, considering she still owes her countless books, so Reimu could be a succubus for all she cares.

After telling her to lighten up about Marisa, I promptly left.

So much for that.

Entry 133:

Today was slow and long. My life has become such a random bustle ever since summer, I guess I'm not really used to these kind of days anymore. It used to be that I'd spend days and days at a time in solitude, just working away, not caring about the outside world. Yet today, I was kinda lonely. I wished that somebody would come over, but I had work to do, so I didn't leave myself. Maybe I've become too attached to things...

No, that's not it. I've just gotten past the stage of "loner" and realized the joys of having friends. I can't believe I was able to live without them before. I mean, I would talk to people yes, have the occasional run-in with the usual people, but I never really had people that I'd talk to nearly every day, that I know I could count on to make me happy, that I could return the favor to any time.

Yet, at the same time, I feel as if the friends I've found, or should I say FRIEND, is thinking less and less of me every day. Marisa really has been my one friend ever since I left Makai, even if I never wanted to admit it. After I had gotten to know her better, I just wanted to get closer and closer, until these feelings emerged. Romantic thoughts are not to be taken lightly if they are true, and I'm positive mine are. Of course I'm going to want to be near Marisa, to talk to her, to see her.

And yet, despite all of this bonding I have done with her, she goes to choose Reimu. No, I'm not going to go as far as to say that I was the only choice for her, but I honestly don't see what all Reimu has done for her in the past. They disagree about countless things, which gets them into countless fights. Reimu herself hardly favors anybody or anything except Gensokyo, herself, and her donations. I don't understand what kind of logic would lead Marisa in that direction...I guess Reimu is cute and all, but Marisa can't be THAT shallow. I know she isn't, or else she would have had plenty of "loves" by now.

Entry 134:

Another virtually eventless day.

There's only one good thing about days like this: I get a lot of my own thoughts sorted out. Through a lot of self-reflection, I've finally been able to recapture the love that I have for Marisa for use in my spellcards. Yet, something is different. I feel as if the love is no longer free and whimsical, but a duty and a part of me. The love can no longer act as it did before, simply because it no longer has options like it did before Reimu came into the picture.

This power is of sheer will and determination now...Determination toward what, I'm not entirely sure. But my heart knows, even if I'm not consciously aware of it's intentions.

I'm going to go to the Shrine tomorrow, hopefully Marisa will be there. I want to wish those two best of luck, but tell Reimu that I have high expectations of her, and for her not to let me down, or else she'll have these spells to deal with. I think that's a reasonable solution to this problem.

Entry 135:

That bitch. That no good, manipulative, whorish bitch.

As I got to the Shrine, I VERY CLEARLY saw Reimu hit her. Very. Very. Clearly. I don't care what they were fighting about, Marisa looked hurt. And NOBODY hurts Marisa like that.

I hope Reimu enjoys the black eye I gave her, because she's going to need to live it up as much as she can before our duel tomorrow.

That bitch is going down.

Entry 136:

Game set and match.

I hope Reimu's learned her lesson in blood, because mercy is for those who deserve it, and like hell if I was going to hold back on her.

Entry 137:

I...I don't know what to say about anything...I guess I should start from the beginning.

Reimu called me out to that duel for obvious reasons. She said she didn't want to do it that day though, for reasons she wouldn't tell me. Grudgingly I accepted it, but I realized that this would give me time to plan out what I was going to do, as well as bring more spellcards with me.

Either Reimu wasn't taking it as seriously as she should have, or she's really lost her touch, because I won that duel hands down with my new spells. I thought that Reimu would have learned to treat Marisa with more respect, but I've done just the opposite.

Apparently, I hurt Reimu really badly. Those spells I've devised, when Unbridled Passion took down several trees without maximum output, I should have known how powerful they were. But I continued to use them without hesitation, continued to let my own rage befall me.

Worst of all...Marisa hates me. She wants me to leave them alone, both of them, because what I've done is terrible.

I don't blame her. Reimu looked half dead. Probably was.

Marisa...I'm sorry. More than you could ever realize.

If I died tonight, nobody would care. I just might. The world would do better without me anyway.

I did it out of love...What have I become?

[Sect]

: (

On the one hand, I'm kinda proud of Alice, in that not only did she manage to beat Reimu in a spellcard duel, but that she didn't go psycho yandere on her (or, at least not full out like everyone's expecting).

On the other hand, I'm a bit disappointed in her. Also, worried, but I'm... eighty five percent sure that she will never go through with her thoughts of suicide. Anyways, one of her problems is that she's never really forthcoming with her thoughts and emotions to anyone, always too hesitant. Perfectly reasonable, but when one of the issues surrounding this whole debacle appears to be that most people aren't taking her seriously, well...

[Blackraptor]

I can't blame Alice for what she did, considering her childhood in Makai and how she lived in Gensokyo up to that point. She's never really had anyone to confide in aside from her dolls, litterally just talking to herself, and Marisa. It was inevitable that she's form a bond with Marisa and it would grow into something far more.

Problem comes from Alice never experiencing love before and getting shot down in a not-so-subtle way, damn you Marisa, we could have avoided all of this if you didn't have the social graces of a grenade.

There's really no one at fault here. Alice is reeling from being rejected by her first love. Marisa is just being Marisa. And Reimu is just being Reimu. Honestly, with the kind of love-based power Marisa throws around so leasurely, there should be no doubt that Reimu loves Marisa immensely.

Just another tale of unfortuate circumstances and Danmaku. Lets just hope Shinki doesn't get word of this...

[Marin The Magus]

Well, Alice had her reasons for doing that. Though, she could have controlled herself a little bit more. And Marisa...Breaking what the doll's simbol meant so easily, that certainly didn't seem like Marisa. Besides, she has seen Reimu almost dying of dnamaku (if that's even possible) and she has done nothing to the ones that did it, IN FACT, she has fought with Reimu several times. I'm just mad at Marisa, but being the love-magician she is, I should've expected it.
 

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 138:

Well, in a nutshell, today sucked. I still can't get my mind off of how Marisa looked when she told me to leave her alone...

When I hit Reimu and gave her that black eye, Marisa looked mad. I signed it off as a "she'll thank me later" at the time, but now I'm starting to rethink that. I was in such a blind rage that I didn't care, all I wanted to do is make Reimu pay for hurting Marisa.

Marisa didn't want us to duel. She knew that I was going to overdo it, I think. I subconsciously knew I was going to overdo it as well, but I didn't care. All that needed to be done was make Reimu pay. That's it.

Before our duel started, I noticed that Marisa was looking onward with a grim look. I don't know what she could have been thinking though, seeing her friend and her girlfriend fight like that. I doubt it could have been nice though.

I'll admit that I broke the spellcard rules in our duel. I wasn't after a fair fight, I wasn't fighting with beautiful thought like you're supposed to. I wasn't looking to simply overpower her to make a deal in my favor - I was looking for blood. At that moment, I could have died, and it wouldn't have mattered to me. All I was concerned about was taking Reimu down, making sure she'd remember to treat Marisa with respect, or die for it. Such blind rage...I feel it now, even. I still don't forgive Reimu for doing what she's done. But I feel terrible for what I've done.

I shouldn't have hurt her that bad. Either she's a really good actress, or she was on the edge of passing out. The sheer overwhelming power of the danmaku I used wasn't charged to be numerous like it usually is - it wasn't made simply to be powerful in numbers in hopes of hitting its target. No, it was made with a rageful power, with intentions of destroying the target. Maybe I had created less danmaku that way, but the bullets and lasers I did create were very quick and powerful. It's through repeated hits with such shots that Reimu's spells were broken so quickly, and the aftershocks of that power physically hurt her. Badly.

But, to be completely honest, I was glad I hurt her. And I still would be if it weren't for the fact that Marisa now hates me for it. She was over Reimu when she landed with a horrified look, a look that will haunt me for a long time, I'm sure. Her eyes, although once filled with cheer and energy, were filled with shock and tears in that moment. And I caused it. All of it. And even worse, Marisa was up in an instant, pointing her Hakkero at me, screaming at me to just get away from them. And...

And that she doesn't want me to be around her ever again, she said.

Entry 139:

I really want to cry. I really do. But for some reason, I can't. I'm just...existing. I have this constant weight on my heart, and I can't do anything about it. I can't even kill myself correctly. I sat last night with a knife to my neck for at least an hour...I can't do it. For one, I can't stand the pain, but more importantly I can't stand the thought of leaving this world with Marisa still so mad at me. I can't get pills from Eirin either, because I know she wouldn't perscribe something that would kill me.

I'm really stuck. I really am. Marisa hates me, she doesn't want to talk to me. I can't end my own life. I can't control anything, can I? The only thing I have are these dolls...And even then, as I control them, the futility in their own existence is astounding, as they get destroyed at a sizable rate during battles. So what do I really control?

Nothing.

Entry 140:

That doll of me is sitting on my bedroom shelf, and it's unsettling. I know I still have this doll, but does Marisa still have the doll I gave her? Doubtful - she most likely Master Sparked it after what I did to Reimu. I don't blame her, considering how much of a failure I am.

I can't please Marisa even if I tried, because I have been trying, and look where it got me. I try to be her friend, and she accepts it at first, but I ruined that with all these stupid thoughts of romance. And after that, I tried to be somewhat of a guardian angel to her, reasoning that even if I can't have her, I could make sure she at least lives happily. But I had to ruin that as well with my stupid emotions, never thinking, only doing.

And now I'm here, alone. Again. Sitting in my house, my dolls the only ones I have as company. And, when one goes to think about it, that means nothing. I have fabric and wood as company - yeah, I'm leading a great life here.

Maybe I should go see Patchouli to get my mind off this stuff...I really just need SOMEONE as a friend right now.

Entry 141:

Well Patchouli hardly helped. All she told me was that I kinda deserved it, even though I was trying to be nice to Marisa. She just calmly told me to keep a better check on my own emotions and look out in the future.

How like her to basically not care about other people's problems. I mean, at least she didn't get mad or anything, but she could have at least shown a LITTLE interest. I guess that's just Patchouli though. If she were to be concerned with relationships, she would leave her library once in a while and go have a few outside of the mansion.

Entry 142:

Everything hurts. It's hard to get up in the morning even, considering I have nothing to get up for anymore. All I do now is try to work, but that work is simply for myself, and has no benefit on anything outside of my own home, really. So, in reality, the choice when I wake up is to either stay in bed and mope, or get up and slave away at things that don't matter anymore. Such a choice.

Marisa, I love you so much, you have no idea. I'm so sorry for what I did, I was just trying to protect you...If I had one chance to make it up to you, I would do anything you wanted. Anything.

Entry 143:

I really want to go out and apologize to her, but I can't find the heart to. I'm not going to go see somebody who hates me, because then I would have betrayed her wishes yet again. She wants me to stay away from her, and I painfully have to. I just really wish that I could go back in time and fix this stupid ordeal...There's nothing I can do about that, though. Even if I had somebody like Keine to help me, messing with history to fix a stupid mistake that only affects a very small group of people is quite selfish of me, as well as a waste of time and energy. Besides, the full moon isn't for another couple weeks.

I can't really go to talk to Reimu either, I doubt she's happy at me due to what I did. I don't blame her at all for that, though. The point of what I did wasn't to make Reimu happy, it was to make her sorry for mistreating Marisa. I don't know if she's actually sorry, though, because Marisa isn't happy about it either. I bet if anything, she's just pissed that I was meddling with things that really aren't my business.

And yet...I love Marisa. So it IS my business. Even if she hates me...I still love her. This kind of love isn't something that people would normally think of, I imagine. No, what I feel for Marisa is beyond simple infatuation, simple lust, simple joy. What I feel for Marisa is at a much, much deeper level than that.

Marisa, even though she might hate me, I will never stop caring about her. I'm always going to want to protect her, because she is so special to me. I can't even begin to describe in words why that is, but it just is. I could try to bring up my story about meeting her in Makai again, but it simply does not do this feeling justice. No matter what happens, I will always love Marisa, and I will always be here for her, even if she doesn't want it. I will always come to her aid when she needs it, and I will always look out for her. Always think of her fondly, and always do my best to ensure she lives happily...

Entry 144:

I was reading over what I wrote yesterday, I don't know where all of that pure emotion came from. I think I hit a nerve in my own heart, and it just kind of happened. It was as if I had struck a point of enlightenment, like I had decided my life's goal right then.

And it's all true.

I can't explain why, but Marisa is simply the most special person in my heart, whether she knows it or not. And everything I do, in reality, is for her.

I miss her so much...

Entry 145:

I've come to a conclusion today while attempting to work. I'm going to apologize to Marisa tomorrow, and then I'm going to apologize to Reimu. I don't care what either of them think, I owe them an apology.

Tomorrow.

Entry 146:

It was...awkward, to say the least. Marisa wasn't at her house, so I headed to the Shrine instead. Sure enough, the two were sitting together, having tea. Reimu looked like she was better, although she still had a few marks on her.

I had to stand there in front of both of them, after being greeted with a curt "what do you want" from Reimu, and apologize. It was hard to stop myself from crying, but I did it. And, after I had gotten no response from either of them, I just left.

I tried my best to apologize fully, and I meant every word I said. And yet, I have a feeling that either they didn't believe me, or they didn't care. Reimu looked mad, and Marisa looked confused. I just don't know what to do anymore. There really is nothing left, considering I've apologized, and that's gotten me nothing.

So what now?

Entry 147:

Tears. So many tears. I don't understand anything.

Marisa came over to my house today to say she accepted my apology. And yet, when she left, she left behind something.

A doll.

[Sect]

;_;

[Ryuu]

marisa is the best bro ever

[Marin The Magus]

I swear that if I was Alice, instead of hitting Reimu, I would hit Marisa...

[Blackraptor]

Good lord...Alice needs a hug. If this isn't the end yet, I can only shudder when I think about how low Alice's psyche can go after that kind of emotional stress.

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 148:

The two dolls are sitting together on that shelf. And there they shall stay, I assume.

I'm not going to throw either of them away. I just can't bear to do that. I can't believe Marisa would just do that to me though, after all we've been through.

I don't feel like writing today. I just can't. I have enough to worry about right now, like trying to keep myself from going insane, that even trying to form a sentence correctly is hard for me.

Entry 149:

I was hoping that Marisa being Marisa just left the doll here, and would be back by now to pick it up and say she was sorry for any misunderstanding. Well, I'm sadly mistaken, because they're still sitting in the same place that I left them. The two dolls of eachother, sitting side by side...It's the closest I'll ever get to her again, isn't it? I just...I don't even know where to begin about how to feel about this. I don't think anybody has created a sufficient word to explain the terrible ache that pains me every day.

I screwed up, big time. And I can't do anything about it. I'm completely at the mercy of Marisa, and she doesn't want to have to do anything with me.

Entry 150:

I went on a walk today through the forest. I went and I explored plenty of places that I've never been before. Or, at least, I wish it was that nice.

Now that I'm done kidding myself, I ran out into the forest today. I was kind of hoping that some powerful youkai or animal or something would find me before anybody else did, but I can't even have that. I just kinda blindly headed into the forest, not caring where I was going, hoping to find either an end or a new beginning. I found nothing but mushrooms and trees. Those damned mushrooms...they remind me of Marisa. Why can't I get my mind off of her? That no good bitch is the one responsible for my sorrow. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't have fallen in love with her, and I wouldn't be here today, doing what I'm doing now.

And yet...She told me never to regret loving somebody. Does she regret telling me that? I have no idea what to think of her...I care about her so much, and at the same time, she is the catalyst of my downfall.

Just somebody kill me, please.

Entry 151:

Yukari made a suprise appearance at my house. She told me that she heard from Reimu about our fight, and pitied me a little. Key word: little.

She said a lot of random nonsense like she always does, and seemed to enjoy herself when it was getting harder and harder to contain my own emotions. I swear, she lives for nothing but to annoy people and push their limits, and finds it funny when people snap. Poor Ran must have a handful every day to deal with.

Apparently this would be the last day that Yukari would be making any major activity, because winter is fast approaching. It's practically here. She wanted to tell me, though, a cryptic message that would apparently solve my problems. It goes as follows:

"When two great powers collide, a large amount of energy is created. This energy is for better or for worse, destructive or constructive. The coexistence of two independently functioning societies, however, do not matter to eachother in the end, and are only bridged by choice, and mean nothing if waived. A symbiotic parasite relies on its host as much as the host relies on the worm, despite the medications given. That way, when nothing is for certain, all makes sense."

And then she gave me a hug and left. What the hell is wrong with that girl, saying such weird things.

Entry 152:

I've been kind of thinking of what that message might mean. It's obviously symbolic, considering Yukari never gives anybody a straight answer until it's too obvious to not already know.

Two great powers colliding: Could mean a number of things - An incident, a weather disaster, Gods battling.
Energy for better or worse: Like hell if I know...I guess it means that the outcome of the happening is never certain?
The societies: Humans and Youkai? The bit about the independence is extremely confusing, because nothing I can think of, except Gensokyo as a whole perhaps, functions completely independently. Could it mean Gensokyo and the outside world?
Symbiotic Parasite: No clue.
Nothing being certain: Why the hell would it make sense when nothing is certain? And what makes sense, even?

I hate Yukari's vagueness. I wish she would have just told me what she meant...

Entry 153:

I give up on that stupid riddle. Yukari is probably just messing with my head and didn't mean anything. It's not unlike her to do that. And besides, just about everyone hates me already, it's not like I had to look forward to anything.

I can't stand myself anymore. I can hardly stand the world as it is. I...I've lost my best and only friend, Marisa.

It's re-hitting me today, and I see the true nature of it all.

Marisa could care less if I die...she doesn't care if I get hurt, she doesn't care if I cry, she doesn't care if I do anything, I could simply disappear tomorrow, or right now even, and she would never notice, let alone care. I know all of this because I still have the doll I made for her...The doll that meant our friendship. She gave her friendship back, basically throwing it away. What does that say to me?

"Fuck you Alice."

I should be mad...But...I can't. I don't know why. I feel as if instead of being mad, I should be sad because I've just failed. Failed being a good friend to Marisa...I'll never live up to whatever Reimu does for her. I've failed my duty that I swore myself to, I can't keep Marisa happy because of how much she dislikes me now.

You'd think that Marisa would know the amount of pain she's causing me, and find a little sympathy in her heart to spare me that. And yet, I must have screwed up in the worst way imaginable if she'd go as far as to end our friendship...

I'm a failure. A terrible, terrible failure. If only I could convey the amount of sadness I'm feeling, and the pain of the tears that are welling up in my eyes right now.

Entry 154:

I went to the village today to stock up on some items I've been lacking. Still, nobody seemed to care that I haven't been out for an extremely long time. I don't even know half the people there, but you think that somebody like a shopkeeper would at least make the note of "haven't seen you in a while miss", considering I go to the same shops every time I need something.

Whenever somebody is sad, they usually tend to talk to their friends about it. Well, sad thing is, I don't have friends to talk to.

Misery is an understatement.

Entry 155:

I swear, I'm going to go catatonic. I can't deal with these emotions, and my only option is to bottle them up and try not to feel. But even that is painful, because I know I'm fighting a losing battle.

I went to Eientei today to see if I could get something from Eirin to help with my stupid emotions...She told me that my daytime emotions weren't a clinical condition, but instead a state of mind, so relying on medicine would be foolish. She did, however, offer to give me something called a Butterfly Dream Pill that would ensure a good dream to whoever takes it. With nothing better to look forward to, I gladly took a bag full.

I hope these things work.

Entry 156:

Yes, I had a wonderful dream. It's 7am right now, and I'm in tears. Why is that?

Well, my dream had everything to do with Marisa, and waking up is a cruel mistress, considering that's when you find out nothing is real.

--

Those pills...What do I do? Do I keep taking them and live in my own fantasy world, just trying to get by in real life, just waiting for night time so I can go to sleep and be happy? That sounds like a terrible, terrible life. I can't do that. I'll keep these pills just in case, but...I just can't take them right now. I'd rather live with the fact that I'm a failure than have to deal with the fact that I'm lying to myself.

Marisa, it's been weeks since I've seen you happy at me. I miss your smile so much...more than you'll ever understand. I can't live without you...

[Ryuu]

I read the previous entry as marisa made another doll for alice and now that I am wrong I am sad : (

[Blackraptor]

Yukari is suggesting a Tenchi solution? And Alice is getting hooked on Eirin's shady drugs?

Clearly, this is all a Moriya Shrine Conspiracy!

[nolrai2]

You can actually understand what Yukari suggested?

I am impressed.

[AMZYoshio]

Entry 157:

That bag of pills is taunting me. I really want to take them, but I know I shouldn't, because it's all a lie.

Why did this sort of misfortune befall me? All I have ever done is love her, and look where it's gotten me...is chivalry so far gone that it's no longer accepted to act in a kind manner like that? What kind of messed up world do we live in where somebody can't even love somebody else without being punished for it?

I sound so terrible. I read the entries I've made, and I sound like I'm either dying or going insane. Both of those probably aren't too far off from the truth, considering how vastly different each entry may be - one is about love, the other hate, the next confusion, then back to love. I don't even understand myself anymore, and nothing good can come of that.

At least the dolls still smile.

Entry 158:

I've tried my best all day to simply do nothing but work. Work will keep my mind off of things. Thing is, all I worked on was trying to figure out what to work on. Honestly, I have no clue, with Aishiteru being a successful failure. I guess I could continue on my project I was working on before that, but looking at it now, I hardly know what I was trying to accomplish with it, despite my detailed notes. It seems so superficial now, in light of what I now know.

Just keep on dredging on, something will get better...

Entry 159:

The most signs of life I saw today were the birds outside my house this morning. And they didn't even stick around.

I hate being lonely. Hate it more than most people should. I miss you Marisa...please forgive me. I can't do anything about it though...it's terrible.

I'm repeating myself over and over again these past few days, and it's starting to sicken me. I know I should be better than this, but I just can't seem to move on. Maybe that in itsself shows how deep rooted my feelings for her are.

Entry 160:

It's getting colder and colder every day. It probably won't be too much longer before it starts to snow.

Entry 161:

If I had a book for every time I said "I can't do this", I'd own a library comparable to Patchouli's.

I can't do this. Then again, what CAN I do? Marisa, you idiot, why did I even fall in love with you? You've been nothing but uncaring toward my emotions ever since you figured out about them, and I don't know why I still continue to care. I can't keep my own emotions suppressed, even when I haven't talked to her in such a long time. I just want to cry, to make everything go away. I don't understand anything, and I probably never will...

I hate emotion. And yet, I can't live without it.

Entry 162:

Well, nothing is looking up, and nothing ever will. I'm serious here...This is it. Weeks and weeks have gone by, and things have only gone downhill.

Ever since I decided to bond more with Marisa, I've learned the joys of having friends. I can't go back to being lonely like I was, I was always miserable then too. Today, though, it's worse, considering I KNOW what I'm missing, and I long for it evermore. I don't think anybody has gone through this kind of pain - the pain of losing everybody you have.

I can't live like this. And I don't think I will continue to.

Entry 163:

I've stopped attempting to work. It's useless.

I should go return the books I've borrowed from Patchouli. Not like I'll be needing them.

Entry 164:

Patchouli was glad I returned her books. But she looked surprised that I returned ALL of them. Still, not like she cares, she has her books back.

I also noticed how Meiling was sleeping with a smile on her face. She's lucky, she has a home where she can talk to people, even if they don't exactly respect her 100%, I know that deep down they like her as one of the family. I'd be jealous, but there's no point in tearing myself further down.

Entry 165:

I cleaned my house today, and made everything extremely tidy. Everything looks as if nobody has touched it in quite a while...that's good. An atmosphere of little stress...At least it can be peaceful.

Entry 166:

It still hasn't snowed. I love the snow, not many people know that about me. Watching it fall for the first time in winter has always been a secret love of mine. It's so beautiful, the blankets of white. The way it glistens in the moonlight as well, it's quite the scene.

There's really nothing left in my life to do but wait for that first snow, I guess.

Entry 167:

Still no snow. And yet, it continues to get colder and colder every day. It's as if even the weather is taunting me...Fitting.

Entry 168:

Clouds are everywhere in the sky, and no snow. It's definitely winter, and still no snow.

I guess I can't ever have anything I want, can I?

Entry 169:

That's it. I'm done waiting for the snow.

I haven't been exactly writing it down, but I've been crying myself to sleep every night for about a week. Every day, I can't shake the feeling of this terrible sadness I have, and I know it's all my fault. I could have done so many things differently, and yet I chose what I did, which screwed everything up. Everything that's happened to me that's driven me to this state of mind has been all my fault.

And so, it is thus, that it's going to end.

I'm useless in the world anyway. Nobody cares if I go, I'm simply another faceless person to everybody. Everybody except for Marisa, I guess. But Marisa is going to remember me as that loser who wouldn't stop her idiotic feelings and would rather ruin the beautiful friendship she shared with me than think of her for even a second.

I guess this is going to be the last thing I ever write then, huh? It's strange, thinking I'll be gone in a little bit. And yet, will I be truly gone? I'll have to pass through judgement, live in the netherworld...Maybe I could get some advice on how to live in the afterlife from Yuyuko.

I'm really running out of things to say. Stalling really isn't an option here, and yet, nobody would know or care if I did.

It's dark out. And still, there's no snow.

I guess this bed will be my final resting place. There's clean sheets, and everything is in order. I just wish there was a way that I could apologize to Marisa one last time, to make sure she knew how sorry I was.

If you ever find this book, Marisa, please know that even though it's selfish of me to say after all that's happened, I still love you. I still wish you nothing but happiness, and I hope that if you don't forgive me, you at least know my reasoning behind my actions. I did everything out of love, and love messes with ones judgement, so I'm sorry for any rash, idiotic things I did to you or Reimu.

I love you.

Goodb

Just then, Alice heard a loud knocking in her door.

"Alice!!! Alice, you in there? I need to talk to you!!!"

Alice knew that voice. The tears that had been welling up in her eyes started to spill over. She couldn't begin to think of what Marisa would want with her right now.

"Go away Marisa..." the dollmaker quietly mumbled to herself. Alice thought Marisa sounded angry, or at least upset about something. "I know I screwed up, you don't have to tell me again."

The excessive knocking continued, but Alice didn't care. If anything, knowing that Marisa was right there, still mad at her, anguished her even further. She picked up the silver kitchen knife that she had sharpened the day before, and pressed it against her neck. She could feel the sharp edge pressing into her skin, and knew that there was no going back now.

"Goodbye..." Alice quietly said, and began to press the knife slowly harder and harder.

Just then, Alice's door broke inward, and Marisa rushed into her room.

"ALICE!!!" The witch screamed as she saw what Alice was about do to to herself. Marisa jumped on top of her, knocking the knife out of her hand.

"Go away, you idiot!!! Can't you see that I'm solving this damned problem!? You'll never have to deal with me again, and you can keep being happy with Reimu..." Alice began writhing wildly and trying to break out of Marisa's grasp, thinking of nothing but the knife.

"Alice, I love you!"

The dollmaker stopped. Her heart skipped several beats, and everything suddenly became quiet.

"Please don't do this Alice...I can't live without you."

"But..."

"I know." Marisa slowly got off her, and went over to the shelf where the two dolls were sitting. "I gave this back to you, but I know how terrible of a mistake this was. Truth is, I've been feeling terrible ever since I did it." Marisa picked up the doll of herself and hugged it tightly.

"What about...?" Alice attempted to say.

"Reimu?" Marisa finished her sentence. Alice only nodded. "I figured out she wasn't what I thought she was...Reimu really is kinda self centered, even worse than I am, which is saying something."

The two girls let off a small chuckle, mixed with Alice's cough of tears. Marisa went to sit next to Alice on her bed, and hugged her warmly.

"Please Alice...I know I haven't been exactly nice to you this past month or so, but I've learned that you're the only person who's ever truly cared about me. Can you forgive me?"

Alice couldn't believe what she was hearing. All she did was begin to cry again. This time, however, the tears were caused not by sadness, but sheer joy.

"I love you..." Alice managed to say.

"You too..." Marisa comforted her.

The two looked out the window next to Alice's bed.

It was snowing.

[Marin The Magus]

I'M FRIGGIN' CRYING AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!
God this was...
I expected this, but still...
STILL...
Oh dear here I go again... *sobs*

[Blackraptor]

The ending...it felt...abrupt. I mean, yeah...Huzzah for Alice. But something just didn't feel right. I don't know...I hope it's just me.

I think Marisa is lying about Reimu. It wouldn't make any sense for her to suddenly dump Reimu for Alice after those events. I don't know...this whole ending kind of leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

*shrugs*

Screw it. I won't overthink this. It was a great read regardless. Cheers!

[Ryuu]

have to agree with blackraptor, though I enjoyed it overall


the ending just seemed to shoot out of nowhere and felt a bit convenient

[AMZYoshio]

In my own defense, about the abruptness, the ending really was happening in front of Alice the entire time, she just didn't care to pay any attention to it. I could write out a better explaination from a not-Alice point of view, and that probably would show how things were going in reality. You guys have to realize that Alice was a super-depressed and confused lovestruck girl, she's not going to think rationally, and her thoughts are going to be plagued by her problems more than solutions.

Just sayin.