I'm imagining an elderly person telling touhou stories as fairy tales in storytelling style
like,
"Once upon a time there's a girl who lives in a very big mansion, she really want to go play outside but unable to because of her physical circumstance........"
"............and she ended up got beaten to a pulp down to the floor by the intruder in her mansion. The girl got rob of her happiness, but everyone else now lives in more harmony. The End"
or
"Once upon a time there's a tiger and a mouse, they are on a journey to find something that can save their friend. The tiger were too prideful to let others know it's blunder, so to hide it the tiger make use of the mouse companion to do the labor. And the tiger able to retain it's respectful appearance because of help from the mouse."
"Once upon a time there's a woman who lives happily with her husband and son, but one day the son was murdered and the mother driven into becoming a terrorist with the help of her friend who is a triple agent and her underling who looks like an arsonist."
"Ice fairy who likes to freeze frogs and got punished by the goddess of frogs"
"A modern young girl who got cut off from electricity and steadily losing common sense"
"Demon rabbit who sells medicine which occasionally mixed in with shady drug."
"A half-ghost who is afraid of ghost."
"Red-green spinning thing by the foot of a mountain."
"Woman in a gap who like to peep on people in secrecy."
"A girl who sell antidote to the people she poisoned"
"A slacking ferryman and stray spirits"