My Touhourtal: A TOUHOU TALE.

[sakrium]

((This is a remake of "My Immortal" and is purely just for kicks and giggles))

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

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Hi my name is marassia keerreeesame salami dementia way and I have long golden hair with salami barrettes. (that?s how I got my name) with black ebony streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and Hazelnut eyes like a cup of coffee and a lot of people tell me I look like Lady Gaga (AN: if u don?t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I?m not related to Mikey Way but I wish I was because he?s a major effing hottie. I?m also a witcca, and I work at a magik shop in Gensokyo where I?m the shoppe owner1. I?m a goth (in case you couldn?t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic?s and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a white corset with red lace and a long black skirt that was see-thru and thigh high boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eyeshadow. I was walking outside Gensokyo. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.
?Hey Marassia!? shouted a voice. I looked up. It was? Aless Margarita!
?What?s up Aless?? I asked.
?Nothing.? she said shyly.
But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

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[sakrium]

Chapter 2: Chapter 2

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The next day I woke up in my broom closet. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my broom closet and drank some stolen ale from a bottle I had. My broom closet had a black ebony door with a hot pink handle that glittered and inside it was red velvet with lace hanging from the ceiling. I got out of my broom closet and took off my giant Lady Gaga t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a golden chain mail, a pentagram necklace, thigh high boots and black fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.
My friend, Reemou woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped short shoulder length mahogany hair  with red streaks and opened her bronze-brown eyes. She put on her favorite spireetual band Nirvana t-shirt with a black mini, stockings and pointy high-heels. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.)
?OMFG, I saw you talking to Aless Margarita yesterday!? she said excitedly.
?Yeah? So?? I said, blushing.
?Do you like Aless?? she asked as we went out of the shrine and out into the shrine ermtrance.
?No I so effing don?t!? I shouted.
?Yeah right!? she exclaimed. Just then, Aless walked up to me.
?Hi.? she said.
?Hi.? I replied flirtily.
?Guess what.? she said.
?What?? I asked.
?Well, Lady Gaga is having a concert in the hewmain village.? she told me.
?Oh. My. Effing. God!? I screamed. I love LG. She is my favorite band, besides MCR.
?Well?. do you want to go with me?? she asked.
I gasped.

[sakrium]

Chapter 3: Chapter 3 (WARNING: May not be "suitable for work" but there's no vulgar language tis all for comedy!)

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On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red stockings. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I straightened my hair and made it look all shiny. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some Lady Gaga. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn?t put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some stolen booze so I was ready to go to the concert.
I went outside. Aless was waiting there in front of her doll carriage. she was wearing a Katy Perry t-shirt (shewould play at the show too), short skirt, and high heels.
?Hi Aless!? I said in a depressed voice.
?Hi marassia.? she said back. We walked into her flying Mercedes-Benz doll carriage (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Spice girls and Britney Spears. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Lady Gaga.
?I wanna roll with him a hard pair we will be A little gambling is fun when you're with me (I love it) Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun, and baby when it's love if its not rough it isn't fun, fun? sang Gaga.
?Gaga is so effing hot.? I said to Aless, pointing to her as she sung, filling the club with her amazing voice.
Suddenly Aless looked sad.
?What?s wrong?? I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.
?Hey, it?s ok I don?t like her better than YOU!? I said.
?Really?? asked Aless sensitively andshe put her arm around me all protective.
?Really.? I said. ?Besides I don?t even know Gaga and she?s going out with some girl.? I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.
The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Aless. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Gaga and Katy for their autographs and photos with them. We got LG concert tees. Aless and I crawled back into the flying Mercedes-Benz doll carriage, but Aless didn?t go back into The Magik Shoppe, instead she drove the car into??? the Magic Forest!

[sakrium]

Chapter 4: Chapter 4 (WARNING: may not be "suitable for work" but it's all for comedy (: No vulgar language or "suggestive" descriptions pure funniness!)

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?ALESS!? I shouted. ?What the EFF do you think you are doing??
Aless didn?t answer but she stopped the flying carriage and she walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.
?What the effing heck?? I asked angrily.
?marassia?? she asked.
?What?? I snapped.
Aless leaned in extra-close and I looked into her gothic blue eyes (she was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn?t feel mad anymore.
And then?? suddenly just as I Aless kissed me passionately. Aless climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. She took of my top and I took of her dress. I even took of my bra. Then she rubbed her thingie on my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
?Oh! Oh! Oh! ? I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then?.
?WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING YOU SILLYWILLIES!?
It was??Patcharollie!

[sakrium]

Chapter 5: Chapter 5

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Patcharollie made and Aless and I follow her. She kept shouting at us angrily.
?You ludacris fools!? she shouted.
I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face. Aless comforted me. She took us  into a mansion, Patcharollie took us to Assistant Professoru Sackooya and Mastery R.e.m.ill.ya. who were both looking very angry.
?They were doing dirty things in the Magic Forest!? she yelled in a furious voice.
?Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?? asked Mastery R.e.m.ill.ya.
?How dare you?? demanded Assistant Professoru Sackooya.
And then Aless shrieked. ?BECAUSE I LOVE HER!?
Everyone was quiet. Patcharollie and Mastery R.e.m.ill.ya still looked mad but Assistant Professoru Sackooya said. ?Fine. Very well. You may return to your magic shoppe.?
Aless and I went hurridly left the mansion getting into the flying doll carriage and returned to my magik shoppe.
?Are you okay, marassia?? Aless asked me gently.
?Yeah I guess.? I lied. I opened the door to my magik shoppe going straight to my bedroom to slip into a long lady gaga ripped t-shirt and new stockings. When I came out?.
Aless was standing in front of the bedroom, and she started to sing ?Just Dance? by Lady Gaga. I was so flattered, even though she wasn?t supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and she reluctantly went back home.

[sakrium]

Chapter 6: Chapter 6

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The next day I woke up in my broom closet. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end and a matching top with broom sticks all over it and high heeled boots that were black. I put on two pairs of stolen earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with stolen glitter.
In the Shrine hall, I ate some poor villagers breakfast cereal (which she also stole) with alcohol instead of milk, and a pint of beer. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the beer spilled over my top.
?BUTTSAUCE!? I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic girl with spiky bronze hair with red streaks in it. She was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down her face and she was wearing black lipstick. She had a deep scar between her breasts she was also wearing blue contact lenses just like Aless?s and her wings had vanished as well. She had a childlike face and porcelain skin. She had a sexy English accent. She looked exactly like Katy Perry. She was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw her kind of like an erection only I?m a girl so I didn?t get one you sicko.
?I?m so sorry.? she said in a shy voice.
?That?s all right. What?s your name?? I questioned.
?My name?s Ustsuho, although most people call me okyou these days.? she grumbled.
?Why?? I exclaimed.
?Because I love the taste of yew.? she giggled.
?Well, I am a thief.? I confessed.
?Really?? she whimpered.
?Yeah.? I roared.
We sat down to talk for a while. Then Aless came up behind me and told me she had a surprise for me so I went away with her.

[sakrium]

Chapter 7: Chapter 7

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Aless and I held our pale white hands with black nail polish as we walked down the steps to the shrine. I was wearing red hearts on my nails in red nail polish.
I waved to Okyou. Dark misery was in her depressed eyes. I guess she was jealous of me that I was going out with Aless. Anyway, I went excitedly with Aless into her house. We went into her room and locked the door. Then?
We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. She felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my black leather bra and she took off her dress. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then she put her girl thingy on mine and we HAD MATING.
?Oh Aless, Aless!? I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Aless?s arm. It was a black heart with an arrow through it. On it in bloody gothic writing were the words? Okyou!
I was so angry.
?You BUTTSAUCE!? I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.
?No! No! But you don?t understand!? Aless pleaded. But I knew too much.
?No, you effing idiot!? I shouted. ?You probably have SAUCESs anyway!?
I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Aless ran out even though she was naked. She had a really hairy you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in okyou?s dark gothic lair where she was having lunch with some annoying prep named Aya and some other people.
?YOULKU, YOU NUTCRACKER!? I yelled.

[sakrium]

Chapter 8: Chapter 8

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Everyone in the room stared at me and then Aless came bursting in the front door even though she was naked and started begging me to take her back.
?Marassia, it?s not what you think!? Aless screamed sadly.
My friend  Reemou  smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her short shoulder length gothic mahogany hair and opened her deep brown eyes with like blood that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had pale white skin that she was wearing white makeup on.  Reemou was kidnapped when she was born. Her real parents are humans and one of them is a witch but Lord Flandry killed her mother and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed.

?Okyou, I can?t believe you cheated on me with Aless!? I shouted at her.
Everyone gasped.
I don?t know why Marassia was so mad at me. I had went out with okyou for a while but then she broke my heart. She dumped me because he liked Aya, a stupid preppy effer. We were just good friends now. She had gone through horrible problems, and now she was gothic. (Haha, like I would hang out with a prep.)
?But I?m not going out with Aless anymore!? said Okyou.
?Yeah BUTTERSTICKS right! LICK off, you buttsauce!? I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Magic Forest where I had lost my virility to Aless and then I started to bust into tears.

[sakrium]

Chapter 9: Chapter 9

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I was so mad and sad. I couldn?t believe Aless for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Aless.
Then all of a suddenly, an horrible woman with red eyes and a red dress and everything started flying towards me on with wings! She didn?t was glowing evily (basically like Flandre in the game) and she was wearing all red but it was obvious she wasn?t gothic. It was?? FLANDRY!
?No!? I shouted in a scared voice but then Flandry shouted ?AND THEN THERE WERE NONE!? and I couldn?t run away
?buttsauce!!? I shouted at her. Flandry fell out of the sky and started to cry. I felt bad for her even though I?m a sadist.
?Marassia.? she yelled. ?Thou must kill Ustsuhou!?
I thought about Okyou and her sexah breas- I mean scar and her gothic brown hair and how her face looks just like Katy Perry. I remembered that Aless had said I didn?t understand, so I thought, what if Aless went out with Okyou before I went out with her and they broke up?
?No, FLANDRY!? I shouted back.
Flandry gave me a machine gun. ?No! Please!? I begged.
?Thou must!? she yelled. ?If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Aless!?
?How did you know?? I asked in a surprised way.
Flandry got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on her face. ?I hath telekinesis.? she answered cruelly. ?And if you doth not kill Okyou, then thou know what will happen to Aless!? she shouted. Then she flew away angrily.
I was so scared and mad I didn?t know what to do. Suddenly Aless came into the woods.
?Aless!? I said. ?Hi!?
?Hi.? she said back but her face was all sad. She was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner.
?Are you okay?? I asked.
?No.? she answered.
?I?m sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me.? I expelled.
?That?s okay.? she said all depressed and we went back into the Magic Shoppe together making out.

[sakrium]

Chapter 10: Chapter 10

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I was really scared about Flandry all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals with my gothic wiccan band of awesome doom WiccaBrooms. I am the lead singer of it and I play guitar (Just like yui from k-on becuz she?s a hot gothic lolita). People say that we sound like a cross between Lady Gaga, Katy Perry and MCR. The other people in the band are Reemou, Okyou, Aless, Ren (although we call her Ohren now. She has red hair with blue streaks in it.) and Suwika. Only today Aless and Okyou were depressed so they weren?t coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Aless was probably slitting her wrists (she wouldn?t die because she was a magician too and the only way you can kill a magician is with m-a-g-i-c-k-k (there?s no way I?m ic writing that) or a doll) and Okyou was probably watching a depressing movie like TWILA, DA GIRL WHO WAS IN LUV W A VAMPIR. I put on a black leather shirt that showed off my boobs and tiny matching miniskirt that said Wicca4lyf on the butt. You might think I?m a prep but I?m really not.
We were singing a cover of ?Kissed A Girl? and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears.
?Marassia! Are you OK?? Reemou asked in a concerted voice.
?What the buttersticks do you think?? I asked angrily. And then I said. ?Well, Flandry came and the saucy jalapeno told me to buttersaucin? kill Okyou! But I don?t want to kill her, because, she?s really nice, even if she did go out with Aless. But if I don?t kill Okyou, then Flandry, will stinkin kill Aless!? I burst into tears. Suddenly Aless jumped out from behind a wall.
?Why didn?t you effing tell me!? she shouted. ?How could you- you- you poser wiccan butt!?

Aless started to cry too all sensitive. Then she ran out crying.
We practiced for one more hour. Then suddenly Patcharollie walked in angrily! Her eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn?t cause she had a headache.
?What have you done!? She started to cry wisely. ?Marassia Aless has been found in her room. She committed suicide by the hands of her dolls.?

[sakrium]

Chapter 11: Chapter 11

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?NO!? I screamed. I was horrorfied! Reemou tried to comfort me but I told her sauce off and I ran to my shoppe crying myself. Patcharollie chased after me shouting but she had to stop when I went into my shoppe cause she would look like a burglar that way.
Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I slit both of my wrists. They got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Lady Gaga song at full volume. I grabbed a pint of beer and some stolen meds and almost overdosed to be with aless. I was so effing depressed! I got out of the bathtub and put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on black high heels with pink broom stuff on the ends and six pairs of stolen earrings. I couldn?t effin believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed? Sackooya was spying on me and she was taking a video tape of me! And Mayleng was masticating to it! They were sitting on floating balls.
?EW, YOU SAUCY PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NEKID! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!? I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Katy Perry on it. Suddenly Okyou ran in.
?ALFASHVER!? she yelled at Sackooya and Mayleng pointing her womb. I took my broom and started shotting Sackooya and Mayleng a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly, Patcharollie ran in. ?Marassia, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!? she shouted looking at Sackooya and Mayleng and then she waved her hand and suddenly?
Suwika ran outside on her ball and said everyone we need to talk.
?What do you know, Suwika? You?re just a little Oni living on the surface in Gensokyo!?
?I MAY BE A ONI?.? Suwika paused angrily. ?BUT I AM ALSO A WICCAN!?
?This cannot be.? Sawkooya said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from her hand where Patchatolli?s spell had shot her. ?There must be other factors.?
?YOU DON?T HAVE ANY!? I yelled in madly.
Maylenng held up the camera triumelephantly. ?The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!?
I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough booze.
?Why are you doing this?? Mayleng said angrily while she rubbed her dirty hands on her kretch.
And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from her. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to attack her and drink her alcohol because I felt faint.
?BECAUSE?BECAUSE?.? Suwika said and she paused in the air dramitaclly, waving her bag in the air. Then swooped she in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.
?Because you?re goffic?? Sackooya asked in a little afraid voice cause she was afraind it meant she was connected with Tenma.
?Because I LOVE HER!?

[sakrium]

Chapter 12: Chapter 12

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Anyway I was in that weird mansion again inside what looked like a nurse?s office now from my alcohol poisoning. Sackooya and Mayling and Suwika were there too. They were going to a gothic bloody dungeon after they recovered cause they were peddlefiles and you can?t have those saucy pervs prancing in Gensokyo with lots of hot gurlz. Patcharollie had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them.
Anyway Suwika came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses.
?Marassia I need to tell u somethnig.? she said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.
?Sauce off.? I told her. ?You know I effing hate the color pink anyway, and I don?t like effed up preps like you.? I snapped. Suwika had been mean to me before for being gottik.
?No Marassia.? Suwika says. ?Those are not roses.?
?What, are they goffs too you poser prep?? I asked cause I was angry that she had brought me pink roses.
?I saved your life!? She yelled angrily. ?No you didn?t I replied.? ?You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Sackooya and Mayleng.? Who MASTABATED to it she added silently.
?Whatever!? I yelled angirly.

Shee pointed her hand at the pink roses. ?These aren?t roses.? She suddenly looked at them with an evil look in her eye and muttered Ale ale jandro! .
?That?s not a spell that?s a LG song.? I corrected her wisely.
?I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes.? Then she screamed. ?Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio imo noto okayo!?

And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew she wasn?t a prep.
?OK I believe you now wtf is Aless??
Suwika rolled her eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing.
?U c, Marassia,? Patcharollie said, watching the two of us watching the flame. ?2 c wht iz n da flmes u mst find urslf 1st, k??

?I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD WOMAN!? Suwika yelled. PATCharollie lookd shockd. I guess she didn?t have a headache or else she would have said something back.
Suwwikaa stormed off back into her bed. ?U r a liar, bookwarm Patcharockalie!?
Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of  Lady Gaga on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like that dead woman from the grudge (if u don?t know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off!) and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss.

?You look kawai, girl.? Reemou said sadly. ?Fangs you do too.? I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed and I sucked all the booze from my veins. I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Sackooya  and Mayleng couldn?t spy on me this time. I traveled to some villages. Okyou was at a kiosk that was selling wigs and magic stuffz. She looked all depressed because Aless had disappeared and she had used to be in love with Aless. She was drinking some licker from her flask.
?Hi.? she said in a depressed way. ?Hi back.? I said in an wqually said way.
We both looked at each other for some time. Utsuhouhou had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Alesss. Then??? we jumped on each other and started mating each other.
?STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!? shouted  Mastery R.e.m.ill.ya who was watching us and so was everyone else.
?Okyou you saucer!? I said slapping her. ?Stop trying to mate me. You know I loved Aless!? I shouted and then I ran away angrily.
Just then she started to scream. ?OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!? and then?.. her eyes rolled up! You could only see her red whites.
?NO!? I ran up closer.
?I thought you didn?t have a scar anymore!? I shouted.
?I do but Ohren changed it into a wiccAN symbol for me and I always cover it up with foundation.? she said back. ?Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Aless??Flandry has her bondage!?

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[sakrium]

Chapter 13: Chapter 13

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Okyou and I ran up the stairs looking for Patcharollie. We were so scared.
?Patchasatch Patcharock!? we both yelled. Patcharollie came there.
?What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?? she asked angrily.
?Flandry has Aless!? we shouted at the same time.
She laughed in an evil voice.
?No! Don?t! We need to save Aless!? we begged.
?No.? she said meanly. ?I don?t give a darn what Flandry does to Aless. Not after how much she misbehaved me in bed especially with YOU Marassia.? she said while she frowned looking at me. ?Besides I never liked her that much anyway.? then she walked away. Okyou started crying. ?My Aless!? she moaned.
?Its okay!? I tried to tell her but that didn?t stop her. She started to cry tears of blood. Then she had a brainstorm. ?I had an idea!? she exclaimed.
?What?? I asked her.
?You?ll see.? she said. She took out her stick and started talking crazy. Then?? suddenly we were in Flandry?s lair!
We ran in with our hands out just as we heard a croon voice say. ?TAKE EM OFF!? It was???.. FLANDRY

[sakrium]

Chapter 14: Chapter 14

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WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD.

We ran to where Flancedry was. It turned out that Flandry wasn?t there. Instead the stupid preppy Aya  girl was. Aless was there crying tears of blood. Aya was torturing her. Okyou and I ran in front of Aya.
?Rid my sight you despicable goths!? she shouted as we started shooting her with the gun she then suddenly she looked at me and she fell down with a lovey-dovey look in her eyes.

?MarassiaIloveyouwiluhavematewithme.? she said.
?Huh?? I asked. ?MarassiaI love you will you have mating with me?? asked Aya. I started laughing crudely. ?What the sauce? You torture my gf and then you expect me to sauce you? God, you are so sauced up you saucing butterstick.? I said angrily. Then I stabbed her in the heart. Blood pored out of it like a fountain.

?Nooooooooooooo!? she screamed. She started screaming and running around. Then she fell down and died. I brust into tears sadly.
?Aya what art thou doing?? called Flandry. Then?? she started coming! We could hear her high heels clacking to us. So we got on our wiccabrooms and we flew to the shrine. We went to my broom closet. Okyou went away. There I started crying.

?What?s wrong honey?? asked Aless taking off her clothes so we could mate. Shee had a sex-pack (geddit cuz shes so sexah) and a really hairy you-know-what and everything.
?Its so unfair!? I yielded. ?Why can?t I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for Reymouu, because she?s not ugly or anything.?
?Why would you wanna be ugly? I don?t like the preps anyway. They are such saucing slugs.? answered Aless.

?Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Sackooya and Mayleng took a video of me naked. Suwika says she?s in love with me. Okyou likes me and now even Aya is in love with me! I just wanna be with you ok Aless! Why couldn?t satan have made me less beautiful?? I shouted angrily. (an? don?t wory marassia isn?t a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) ?Im good at too many things! WHY CAN?T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT?S A SAUCY CURSE!? I shouted and then I ran away.
!

[sakrium]

Chapter 15: Chapter 15

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?Marassia Marassia!? shouted Aless sadly. ?No, please, come back!?
But I was too mad.
?Whatever! Now u can go anh have mate with Okyou!? I shouted.

I stormed into my broomcloset and closed my black door with my blood-red key. It had a picture of Lady Gaga on it. She looked so sexy in a way that reminded me of Aless and Okyou. I started to cry and weep. I took a razor and started to slit my wrists. I drank the booze all depressed. Then I looked at my black LG watch and noticed it was time to go to steal some shet.

I put on a short ripped black gothic dress that said Wiccan on the front in blood red letters and was all ripped and a spiky belt. Under that I put on ripped black fishnets and boots that said Gaga all over them with blood red letters. I put my golden hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. I did sum advanced thief work. I was distracting poor villagers as I stole their wallets. Suddenly the wallet turned to Aless!

?Marassssia I love you!? she shouted sadly. ?I dnot care what those saucer preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna saucing be with you. I saucing love you!.?

Then??. she started to sing ?The one that got away? (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Katy Perry was singing it) right in front of the entire village! Her singing voice was so amazing and gothic and sexxy like a cross between Gaga, Katy, Drake, 50Cent and Miley Cyrus

?OMFG.? I said after she was finished. Some saucing preps stared at us but I just stuck up my middle fingers (that were covered in black nail polish and were entwined with Aless?s now) at them. ?I love you!? I said and then we started to kiss just like BritneySpears (i fukin h8 dat bitch) and Madonna in a that one concert that one time. Then we went away holding hands. Mayleng shouted at us but she stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how sexy we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that Katy Perry would have a concert in the hewman village right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether.

[sakrium]

Chapter 16: Chapter 16


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?Wtf Aless im not going to a concert wid u!? I shouted angrily. ?Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its KatyPerry n u no how much I lik her?
?What cause we?you know?? she gadgetted uncomfortbli cause girlss don?t like to talk a bout you-know-what.
?Yeah cause we you know!? I yielded in an angry voice.
?We won?t do that again.? Aless promised. ?This time, we?re going with an ESCORT.?
?OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?? I asked. ?So I guess ur a prep or a Shinto or what now??
?NO.? she muttered loudly.
?R u becoming a prep or what?? I shootd angrily.
?mARassi! I?m not! Pls come with me!? She fell down to her knees and started singing ?PokerFace? by LG to me.
I was flattened cause that?s not even a single, she had memorized da lyrks just 4 me!
?OK then I guess I will have to.? I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room.
Reemou was standing there. ?Hajimemashite gurl.? she said happily...

?BTW that saucing poser patcharolle gt Kirno imprizned she lyk stole sum imprtna buuk.
"Sam", i sed.
Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some goffic movies like Das niteMARE b4 xmas. ?Maybe Kirno will die too.? I said.
?Kawai.? Reemou shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. ?Oh yeah o have a confession after she got imprizned I murdered her and den Mayleng did it with her cause she?s a necphilak.?

?Kawai.? I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie.
?OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with Aless tonight in the HEwmanE villagee with KatyPerry.? I sed. ? I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA.?
REEEMOU Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. ?Omfg totally lets go shopping.?

?In Hot Topic?s, right?? I asked, already getting out my spshcial Hot Topic?s Loiyalty carde.
?No.? My head snaped up.
?WHAT?? my head spuin. I could not believe it. ?REaMOU are u a PREP??
?NOOOO!NOOOO!? She laughed. ?I found some cool goffic stores near THE ShRINe that?s all.?
?Hu told u abut them? I askd sure it would be Aless or Ohren or Okyou(don?t even SAY that nam to me!). Or me.
?Patcharock.? She sed. ?Let me just call our brewms.?
?OMFFG PATCHYOARLE?? I asked quietly.
?Yah I saw the map for Gensokyo on her desk.? She told me. ?Come on let?s go.?
We were going in a few punkgoff stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in sum town. The salesperson was OMG HOTTER THAN MILEY CYRUS EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT?S IMPOSSIBLE and she gave me a few dresses. ?We only have these for da real goffs.?

?Da real goffs?? Me and Marassia asked.
?Yah u wouldn?t believe how many posers ther are in this town man! Yesterday Mayleng and Sackuewya tried to buy a goffic camera pouch.? She shook her head. ?I dint even no they had a camera.?
?OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!? I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a long black dress with lots of red tulle coming out and very low-cut with a huge slit.
?Oh my satan you have to buy that outfit? The salesperson said.
?Yeah it looks totlly hot.? said Rewmou.
?You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really hot in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?? she asked.
?Yeah I am actually.? I looked back at her. ?Hey BTW my name?s marassia keerreeesame salami dementia GAGA way what?s yours??
?Yuu. Yuucaree? She said and ran a hand through her bleach-blonde hair. ?maybe I?ll see you there tonight.?

?Yeah I don?t think so cause I am going there with my gf Aless you sick perv!? I yelled angrily, but before she could beg me to go with her, Suwika flew in on her black balls looking worried. ?OMFG MARASSIA U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE MANSION NOW!?

[sakrium]

Chapter 17: Chapter 17

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Yuucaree gave us some clothes n stuff 4 free. She said she wud help us wif makeup if she wunted koz she was relly in2 fashin n stuff. (shes bisezual). Suwicka kept shooting at us to cum back 2 The Mandion. ?WTF Suwica?? I shouted angrily. ?Sauce off you sjausing buttsace.? Well anyway Kirno came. Suwika went away angrily.
?Hey itcher you look kawaii.? she said.
?Yah but not as kawaii as you.? I answered sadly cause Kirno?s really pretty and everything. She was wearing a short black corset-thingy with blood red lace on it and a blak blood-red miniskirt, leather fish-nets and black pointy boots that showed off how pale she wuz. She had a really nice body wif big bewbs and everything. She was thin enouff 2 be anorexic.

?So r u going 2 da concert wif Aless?? she asked.
?Yah.? I said happily.
?I?m gong with Ohren.? she anserred happily. Well anyway Aless and Ohren came. They were both loking extremely hot and sexy and u could tell they thoufht we were ot 2. Ohren was wearing a black corset that said ?WICCA? on it. She was wearing tons off makeup jus like a cheap human virgin. Aless was wearing black leather underwear, a gothic black KP tubetop and black thigh high boots she got from da Dark Riverrz.

Reumou was going 2 da concert wif Sandeye. Sandeye used to be called Sanaye but it tuned out dat she was kidnapped at birth and her real family were toads. They dyed in a car crash. Sanaye converted to Toadism and she went goth. Se was in Toadstew now. She was wearing a black bra, black leather booty shorts and heels and long green hair wif white streekz in it. We kall her Sandeye now. Well anyway we al went 2 Aless?s flying black Mercy-Bens carraige (geddit cuz wer gpffik) that her dad ?dollmaster? gave her. We did pot, coke and crak. Alesso and I made out. We made fun of dose stupid saucer preps. We soon got there??.I gapsed.

Katy was da sexiest girleva! Shee locked even sexier den she did in pix. She had long blue hair n piercing blue eyes. Shee wuz really skinny and she had n amazing ethnic voice. We moshed 2 Firework and sum odder songz. Sudenly Katy polled of her mask. So did the other membez. I gasped. It wasn?t Katy at all! It was an ugly preppy woman wif wingz and red eyes... Every1 ran away but me and Aless. Akess and I came. It was??.FLANDRIED and da EVIL VAMPAREES!
?U moronic idiots!? she shooted angstily. ?Marassia, I told u to kill Okyou. Thou have failed. And now???.I shall kill thou and ALESS!?

?No no please!? We begged sadly but she took out her lavivateen.
Sudenly a gothic old woman flu in on her broomstick. She had lung purple hair and a looong nitegown. She wus werring black eyelinr and lots of white fundaton. She shotted a spel and Flandry ran away. It was????PATCHAROCKS!

[sakrium]

there're at least 3 of these fuckers on this forum lmao

xD ughh seriously?! I didn't think anyon had done this yet major bummer

[Tengukami]

Seeing how short the chapters are, and that you're sometimes posting several chapters at a time, you can probably just put a bunch of chapters together into a single post, instead of making separate posts for each chapter and needlessly bumping this thing to the top of the page.

[trancehime]

xD ughh seriously?! I didn't think anyon had done this yet major bummer

i even did a reading of one of them once...