A bit of a serious post.
I've been playing Touhou since October '08. The patterns, the music and everything about it has helped me through some of the hardest times I've ever had, right down to the Hakurei Shrine being my "happy place" if I need to meditate.
On March 11th of this year, my father passed away after a sudden onset of cancer. Needless to say, I was devastated, and after helping comfort my family as best I could, I retreated to my room and fired up Imperishable Night, which at the time was my current Lunatic 1cc goal. I just wanted to lose myself in the challenge, not to mention the sound of Love-Coloured Master Spark and the rest of the soundtrack.
It was on that day of all days that I got what I wanted: a Lunatic 1cc.
I was never happy with the clear I got, since I finished Imperishable Night's End at exactly 5am. It felt as if I hadn't actually won because I "ran out of time" just at the end, not to mention the empty feelings I had that day. It was "good enough"; I achieved the goal I had set out for, but for me it wasn't what I wanted.
Today was the first time I've played IN Lunatic since then, since I've come to associate that particular game and difficulty with the above date and it's sometimes a little painful. It ends a week of me replaying what TH games I have all the way through for old times sake and, other than a false start on stage 1 and losing 4 bombs to a Marisa rugby-tackle in Stage 4, I managed to get a run I was happy with. The Last Spells finished at 2:30am (should have been 2:00am, got SO unlucky with the 3rd) and I captured more spells overall than on my previous run.
I'm eternally grateful to ZUN for creating these games and to MoTK for being such a great community to discuss them in, and I know that the happiness I get from the games/fan stuff, even when associated with painful memories, will continue to keep me motivated.
Apologies if that was tl;dr.
