So, isn't that basically a well-functioning relationship?
Essentially, just BDSM is for people less vanilla about it, or at least are able to share and express their less mainstream fetishes or practices.
But seriously folks, I don't begrudge stuff like this, but am I a bastard if I find dom/sub and all permutations of it completely nuts? ;-;
I'm not trying to be a jerk. I just don't see how anyone could enjoy it. I'm as intimate physically as the next bro dawg BETA PHI BETA PHI WE'RE A BUNCH OF BADASS GUYS brother but it's just not my slice of pie, cup o' tea, boat floated.
Nah, you're not a bastard. To each their own, y'know? Sometimes some things don't need an explanation on WHY you like it, you just do. The prime tenants of BDSM are Safe, Sane, and Consensual, because it's an exploration of each other's inner sexual desires, not the ability for someone to simply cause pain and anguish. In a good D/S relationship, it's actually the Dom that has the hard job; balancing his desires and maximizing pleasure for his sub, keeping them safe during a session, and not crossing any boundaries. The sub, in return needs to be able to communicate clearly and effectively, and know their boundaries.
Some people just don't get off on the feeling of holding power over someone or having someone submit to them, and some people don't get off on submitting to others, being restrained or feeling overpowered. There are so many different sub/dom styles so i'm not going to get into it.
But yeah. TL;DR version: You're not weird, you don't have to tend toward either dom or sub. Just tolerate us and keep and open mind.
Also, you can still learn something from those books for vanilla relationships.
