> Stuffman: Update again quickly to remove unspeakable horror from front page.
Hahaha, NOPE! You're going to read your shitty SBaHJ parody and you're going to like it!
Wait, this
is an update.
Dangit.Fine, let's move on.
~> ACT 1 PART 3> Be Satori.
That is not Satori.
Get out of the way, Orin!
Damn it, cat, don't lay down. Move!
Sigh.
Look, Orin! It's a corpse!
Go get it, Orin! Go get the corpse!
That'll keep her busy for a while.
> Actually be Satori.
You are SATORI KOMEIJI, THE SICKNESS IN EVERYONE'S HEART. (I'm using her Double Spoiler title, because it's rad.) You are the master of the underground PALACE OF THE EARTH SPIRITS, which overlooks the recently no-longer-defunct HELL OF BLAZING FIRES. It is inhabited only by you, your many pets, and occasionally your SISTER.
You possess the ABILITY TO READ PEOPLE'S HEARTS, an ability all creatures of your particular species possess. This is enabled by the power of your THIRD EYE. You are widely feared for this ability, and shunned by almost everyone who knows you have it. As it turns out, the number of people that enjoy having their minds read amounts to EXACTLY NOBODY. Unfortunately, you can't simply stop doing it; for you, reading someone is as natural as looking at them.
On the other hand, you are loved by ANIMALS because you provide them with a MEANS TO COMMUNICATE, something which they normally lack. As such, you allow a large number of animals of all shapes and sizes to reside in the palace as your pets; without them, the place would just be too empty. Some of them are youkai animals, who assist in keeping the rest of your pets fed and cared for (which would otherwise be a large workload).
You are an obsessive BIBLIOPHILE, and you spend most of your time reading and writing books. The ones you publish you do so anonymously, as having your name on them would likely be unhealthy for their popularity.
Today is a special day! YUUGI HOSHIGUMA of the oni has sent out mass invitations to a GIGANTIC PARTY IN FORMER HELL as a gesture of FRIENDSHIP between the youkai of the surface and the underground, partially to ease tensions after RECENT EVENTS (of which you were a part). Yesterday, you received a FRIENDLY THREATENING LETTER insisting on your attendance. You have no desire whatsoever to attend, but when Yuugi Hoshiguma insists on something, you BEST BE OBLIGING.
You are currently in your room, getting very nervous about the party and trying to keep your mind off it. You just hope that with all the youkai coming from the surface, you'll be able to get lost in the crowd and nobody will notice your presence.
> _
