This post is live and closer to a Let's Play than an update, so excuse the brevity :V
I don't have the means to actually Let's Play a game on the DS, which is pretty much why I haven't.
~This is also only assuming that whoever is reading this knows the scenario of the game~When last we left off on Bowser's Inside Story, I was complaining that Bowser was an asshole.
I have since grinded to Lv. 18, shelled out all of the Princess Peach Date Fund on pants, raising my defense from 80... to 150 :V
My physical damage is halved! But now I'm penniless. ;-;
After being defeated, and while leaving, Bowser acts like an asshole and starts busting the shit out of all of the barricades around the shopping mall and Toad Town. ...Actually, that was rather nice of him.
Instead of following him, Mario and Luigi have to get inside him, so they walk right outside the clinic at the mall where they and Bowser fought and they break the wall (
I can't afford property damages, damn you), revealing a
contrived coincidence Very Convienent Entry Pipe Into Bowser's... Shoulder? Side Of Face?
Bowser then unexpectedly takes the rein of the story, and then parades around the lake breaking things and punching wildlife like an asshole. Also, underwater fire.
We find a tower. Bowser opts to get high on the smelly flowers sitting beside it. Now, all this time, "smelly flowers" was a cue for The Worst Minigame Fucking Ever.
Screwing up in any minigame costs coins, and screwing up in this one is damn near inevitable, due to sloppy control. Take the stylus and flick the Mario Bros. around the screen. It sounds fine on paper. It's worse than it sounds.
Peach, you better enjoy McDonalds dollar menu burgersSo we sneeze and the tower rises from out of the lake and smashes us.
What.
So we go to Bowser's dick in an attempt to make him huge.
(The Embiggening Center being right around there on the map)
This is like Gradius, except not. It's vertical and you shoot at balls.
In his balls. And then Bowser grows huge! Like fifty feet tall! You then begin one of the four Giant Boss fights- holding the DS incredibly awkwardly, flicking the stylus everywhere and touching the screen in different places. The result is eventually that you've punched the tower into submission. In the face, preferably- the game goes out of it's way to point that out to you.
What.
And then we walk inside the tower, completely ignoring any fleeting danger stemming from structural damage- you know, because we punched this thing a lot.
We find a few buttons Bowser is mentally incapable to operate, and then walk into a room at the top of the tower.
Bowser reads a book that actually contains a hologram/ghost thing of the tower's owner, who doesn't seem to mind the new holes here and there in his tower, or the fact that his tower was almost entirely underwater for some number of years. Surprising, as it bears his likeness.
He shows us his invention, an Invisibleness Ray Machine that looks like a cross between a projector and a Boo. The end the light comes from is the opposite than what you might guess at first. It makes his body invisible in certain places- but who cares about that, we can now track down that worm Bowser inhaled~
After probably the most annoying dungeon ever, we find the worm. It's tiny and shouldn't have any more than five hitpoints.
Also, this
is a no-dodge run, to remind you. The importance to say again stems from the fact that one of her attacks won't end until you smack her with a hammer. In the face.
And after a few Jump Helmets to the face, she gets bigger!
Which would explain the 400+ damage that little worm could take.
She begins shooting stars and crystal hearts and shrinking you and stomping on Tiny Ass Mario & Luigi.
That's.... it? Wail on her enough and she gets tiny again.
I take the next three turns using Jump Helmets, shaving way more HP than any worm ought to have. And then she got tiny, so Jump Helmets started doing around 260 again, instead of 150 damage. I won rather quickly.
She then turns into a butterfly, expects Mario to comment on her figure, gives us our Star Plot MacCoupon, and then flies off, having only this to say:
And pleaaaase... Stop following me aaaaroundddd... It's creeeepy....
Well said.
To leave, we follow her out the door.
Mario Lv. 21
105 HP / 33 MP / 89 St / 139 En / 64 Ag / 74 Lu
Luigi Lv. 21
125 HP / 31 MP / 64 St / 150 En / 44 Ag / 90 Lu
Bowser Lv. 19
248 HP / 35 MP / 152 St / 209 En / 30 Ag / 74 Lu
(Did I mention the retarded EXP curve? Bowser has 11,786 EXP and Mario has 22,266. They're two levels apart.)
I probably should have Let's Played this game from the start, but it would've been text-only. Like the above, I guess, this is for the bored.
I know I am. I'm in a car headed home from Vegas. It'll be like a 20 hour drive.
