Updates will begin around 8:00pm GMT+1 now, since this is simply an easier time for me.
DAY 3: THE DAY OF OLD PEOPLE
>Rigged I tell you, rigged. Eviscerate the next poster with my verdant fury.
4+1 =5 : You know what Dormio, I've had it with your rule-breaking. No +1 for this, and you can't screw the rules, you don't have 6's.
Raikaria: Attack Dormio
1: GODDAMNIT
Raikaria must roll to dodge!
3: Owchie. Where did Dormio get this power anyway? [-1 to next roll for me]
>Transform wall into a state of the art Mobile Suit.
2: It's a wall.
(It's sort of a modified Gundam, the page I linked tells about it.)
Well, time for this old-timer to show everyone what it means to be a Mobile Suit Pilot!
>Let's push this thing's speed to the limit, and take out as many Mobile Suits as we can!
1: You shut the Gundam down. And promptly get shot like the sitting suck you are.
Hanzo must Roll to Dodge!
3: You manage to power back up and dodge in time, but you took some minor damage. [-1 to next roll]
>Get on knees, put your hands in the air, and look upwards, wailing "NOOOOOOOOO!!!" as the camera pans outward dramatically.
3: Unfortunately you cannot get the camera to pan. So instead you go for a stationary comic panel instead.
>Become THE magical girl
2: You're too old to qualify.
>Keep digging! We I shall find whatever answers we I seek beyond the earth's crust!
>Feel sad about becoming old.
3: You keep digging. However, you do not find answers.
(http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130321050426/lotr/images/a/ae/Wikia-Visualization-Add-3.png)
Oh crap.
Unmatched Sock must Roll to Dodge!
2: The Balrog lashes you with it's fire-whip, but you manage to survive.
Unmatched Sock is Seriously Injured!
> Turn young again through sheer hot-bloodedness.
3: You lose a year worth of age. Welp, you did turn younger.
>Become the New Gandalf.
6: You become the New Gandalf. Unfortunately, this draws attention from the Balrog.
The Hating Hater must Roll to dodge!
3: Apparently, squishy wizards are more nimble than miners. You get nicked by the Balrog's Fire-sword still. [-1 to next roll]
Haman's a lady. But that's not important. What's important is getting her into a Guncannon!
>Convince her to pilot a Guncannon.
5: You convince the pink-haired now-old lady to get into a Guncannon. Which promptly becomes more awesome when a giant Kanako shows up, the 'Guncannon Goddess' and works alongside you.[+1 to next roll for sheer awesome]
>This must be a sign of the Elder Gods coming! I must prepare myself for their imminent arrival.
2: The only thing coming is a Balrog. You cannot prepare for that.
> Revert Yamame and myself back to our proper ages via the ~*~power of love ~*~.
4+1 =5: LOVE CONQUERS ALL. Including money and badly-made Hammock-induced magic! [+1 to next roll]
> ::)
2: :(
>Attempts to fight the class system by using his dull and broken axe to heal the Fightest's wounds.
6: Not only do you heal Fightest's wounds, but your healing might goes so far as it reverts everyone back to their true age, since that counted as a negative status effect! Unfortunately since Fightest wasn't petrified, PX is still stone.
Fightest is healed!
Zakeri has changed class into 'Axe Cleric'
Everyone is back to normal ages!
Kyuubei slinks back to wherever it came from, to make some poor little girl magical.
>Acquire (read: steal) a weapon.
1: You give all your weapons away.
>Sojourn to the Zeon Beat Factory to obtain all the wubs I shall ever need.
4: Wubs, fully loaded!
Oh right RPG exists
> Locate a suitably large tree to attach to; maybe its nutrients will transform my arm to match the rest of me!
5: You attach to a suitably large tree. Not only does this fix your arm, but it upgrades you from a mere Dryad into a Treant. Except this isn't your normal slow Treant, it's a lighter, slimmer Treant that's got Dryad qualities. Think a Treant that's not like a 90 year old man.
>Praise the Nines for Nines are the most Nines in the Nines.
6: By praising the 9's, you make 7 angry. 7 then proceeds to eat 9.
789.
>Acquire a steamroller and roll onwards to the future!
4: 'When this steamroller hits 66 MPH, we're gonna see some serious ****'
"Oh no, we've lost track of the ball."
"Who cares about the ball Bob, the players've started fighting!"
1: The Oni promptly stop fighting, dig up the ball, and start to play like the Crow Tengu teams. The crowd get angry at the commentator's curse, and come for you!
O4rfish must Roll to Dodge!
5: The crowd get distracted by a fairy team flying onto the pitch for some reason, thinking it's their turn, and promptly getting beaten up by BOTH Oni teams. The Violence is far better this way! [+1 to next roll]
>Look for a four-leaf clover. You'll need the luck.
5: You find two 4-leaf clovers. [+1 to next roll]
> Construct a statue of Einstein whose presence blocks time-travel.
6: You construct a statue of Eienstein, who's completion happens just as time travel initiates. This makes the timeline go mental, akin to 'Chicken or the Egg'.
Ultimately, the steamroller both remains in this time, and manages to travel to the future. Whoops.
LaserTurtle now has a clone in the future! He can command both of them in the same turn. FutureTurtle and PresentTurtle must be used to differentiate them.
>Acquire a fitting walking stick. Preferably something in the +4 range.
4: You get a walking stick. You don't need it anymore, but it's fancy!
>Make those damn kids get off my lawn.
2: You go to chase the kids off your lawn.
Then you remember EVERYONE is an old hag, so there are no kids to chase.
Of course, right after you realize this and go back inside, Zakeri's magic turns everyone back.
> Attempt to ask Nuffle a question. (The question being "Can I just make a rolling post and not be in the game?")
6: You manage to ascend to the plain beyond the game, and ask Nuffle a question, to which he answers 'You are beyond the game already.'
Keester2 is beyond the plain of reality!
PX how dare you turn me into an old hag! >:<
> Use PX's power of aging to change my Baby Dragon and Dark Magician into the Ancient Thousand Dragon and Dark Sage! Now the convention hall belongs TO MEEEEEE!
Learn your Children's Card game card names Shadoweh.
e Sorry I only memorize GOOD CARDS
5+1=6: Despite recalling a card that isn't good [Dark Sage], despite his claim to the contrary, Shadoweh manages to summon Thousand Dragon and Dark Sage without using Time Wizard. Unfortunately, you are quickly called out on for cheating by Children's Card Game officials, who had arrived to congratulate you for your Exodia topdeck. The creator of the game himself sets the Rule-maker on you, under the pretense that only the people who can defeat him in a Children's Card Game, can screw the rules of said game.
>Old Magical Girl (woman?)? Lich time.
5: You turn back into a not-old woman [Good thing too, or else Revive kills zombie] and then turn yourself into a Lich.
Of course, Liches, being a type of undead, means doing so kills you and then instantly revives you.
UncertainJakutten has died!
UncertainJakutten has resurrected as a Lich!
* Special Lich rules: Liches can treat 3's on a Roll to Dodge as 4, and 2's as 3's. They do not care about mere injuries. 1's are always 1's. This is because you sacrificed your first life.
> Equip the town loon in my armor slot.
1: The Town Loon equips you as a weapon.
> Place a kitten in the topic
6: You place 1,000 kittens in the topic.
In true Dwarf Fortress Fashion, if left unchecked, this will turn into a Catsplosion.
>Give Shadoweh a flying cane
5: You give Shadoweh a flying cane powered by rockets!
====
Status:
*Note: To save time and space, only actual status changes will be listed. You can keep track of your position in story from the above.
Players:
Alive:
Hanzo K: -1 to next roll
Unmatched Sock: Seriously Injured [2]
Hater: -1 to next roll
Phlegeth: +1 to next roll
Kilgamayan: +1 to next roll
LaserTurtle: Can command PresentTurtle and FutureTurtle
O4rfish: +1 to next Roll
Massaca: +1 to next roll
Keegster2: Is beyond the game's Multiverse, with me and Nuffle. [Anything targeting him will only work on a 6]
Undead:
UncertainJakutten [2nd Life]: Is a Lich, by sacrificeing his 1st life. 3's on dodges are 4's. 2's on dodges are 3's. 1's are still 1's. On death is Perma-Dead.
Dead:
Pesco
NPC:
Raikaria: -1 to next roll
Nuffle: Talking with Keegster2
Kyuubei: Left the game
The Balrog: On a rampage
1,000 Kittens: Growing at an accelerated rate
====
The Balrog has joined the game!
Time until Kittens reach maturity and cause a Catsplosion: 3 turns
Counters to ???: 1/6
===
Balrog:
Pass Gandalf by using extreme force [Hater]
Raikaria:
Do nothing except roll for himself to remove -1 penalty
===
Day 4 begins!
DAY 4: We must be on the Internet. There are too many cats.
>Pain pain pain pain pain! Heal wounds by sheer will, add some mana that I gained from digging earlier to help with that. Healy Beams, go!
>Thank Hater for drawing off the Balrog!
4: Your healy beams work, and restore your injuries! An Unmatched Sock is healed!
[Fun fact, a 3 was basically the 2nd worst outcome. 2 would fail to dig, 1 would be flying [The opposite], and 6 would be the only thing WORSE.]
> Take on the Balrog in an epic battle involving lots of fire and lasers.
2: You're too scared to take on the daemon.
>Flee due to it being dangerous to go alone and not having a weapon.
3: You flee, but trip as you do so. [-1 to next roll]
Well, time to do some really fun stuff!
>Let's procure a Power Loader module for the Mobile Suit, and a 150 meter version of the Eager Cleaver (http://monsterhunter.wikia.com/wiki/Eager_Cleaver)! Giant Sword shenanigans!
3 - 1 = 2: You cannot find a Power Loader Module.
Horray, I'm a dog-girl now!
>Transform the 1000 cats into catgirls and use them as minions.
5: You transform the kittens into Kittengirls, the loli equivalent. In doing so, you shift into a Cat-Girl yourself.
> :getdown:
6: Apparently, your spirit's desire to :getdown: is so strong is spreads to your lifeless body, breaks you out of petrification, and you return to life! [The basilisk having left]
Pesco...is... ALLLIVE!
Well, since we've got a Balrog...
>Summon Glaurung the Golden.
2: Well, it's lucky I don't need to research who you're even on about.
>Wonder why I didn't kill Zengar like I was supposed to. Settle for quietly stabbing Kasu in the back with a bowling pin during his epic battle with the Balrog.
1: Because you didn't roll a 6 and 'attack the poster after me' is against DA RULES.
You attempt to stab Kasu in the back, as he fought against the Balrog. Except he never fought it. So you just find an angry Balrog. Whoops.
Dormio must Roll to Dodge!
2: The Balrog breathes fire at you, and while you find a conviently located pit of water nearby, you are still badly burnt.
Dormio is Seriously Injured!
> Pet ALL the kittens
3: You'll have to settle with Kittengirls... and you lose track of them and fail to pet 100% of them. Silly things keep moving.
> Break the fourth wall.
4: In acknowledging the Fourth Wall, you broke it anyway.
>Step 1: Bring Guncannon Goddess to the highest concentration of cats
Step 2: Employ Dubstep Gun
Step 3: Let nature take its course.
6: You employ the Dubstep Gun upon the army of Kittengirls. Unfortunately, it seems Kittengirls dislike Wubs. 'Nature taking it's course' turns into '1,000 Kittengirls rushing at you to slice you apart'
Purvis must Roll to Dodge!
6: Unfortunately, you brought a Goddess Along. TURN UP THE WUBS! MAXIMUM WUBBAGE!
NNR's army of Kittengirls must Roll to Avoid Wubness!
1: The Kittengirls fall to the ground, foaming at their mouths, as the wubs melt their minds.
NNR's Kittengirl Army has died!
Achievement Unlocked: Mass Murder
>Her :|
>Well, that was easy. Create phylactery.
3: You create a phylactery. But you failed the first time so more blood was required, so you feel a little woozy. I am thinking of the right kind of phylactery, right? [-1 to next roll]
>Hire my own personal army of magical girls. Killing witches, getting bitches 8)
1: Your attempt to hire an army of Magical Girls only causes a familiar face at appear.
(http://animenovel.blicky.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/kyubey.jpg)
"You have interfered with my magical girls for the last time"
PX must Roll to Dodge!
4: You close your eyes to avoid looking into Kyuubey's. When you open them, Kyuubey is gone.
> Get forged with +50 crit.
5: The Shim: Unique Weapon. Lv 80. Main Hand.
+100 Crit. +1 to next roll
>Join the fight against the Balrog supporting those who wish to take them down
...I can't do anything about the cats, sorry.
5: You join the fight against the Balrog, in a support role! +1 to any rolls targeting the Balrog this turn! +1 to your next roll for Karma!
>PresentTurtle: Ride steamroller over Balrog HUZZAH!
>FutureTurtle: How far into the future am I? AAAAAAAAH (Panic)
Present Turtle: 2+1 = 3: You ride a Steamroller over the Balrog. Nothing happens. To either of you.
FutureTurtle: 5: You calculate you are 300 years into the future. You also appear to be next to a ruined statue of Eisenstein. This means you know roughly where you are too! [+1 to next roll]
> Buy a Xbox One.
6-1=5 : You buy an XBox One, and it turns out it's actually not a spying machine! [+1 to next roll]
> Fireproof myself to defend against the Balrog!
4: You fireproof yourself. No-one quite knows how, but you did it!
Everything went better than expected. Can't let this go to waste.
>Jump in the Qubeley (http://gundam.wikia.com/wiki/AMX-004_Qubeley) (now that it's empty) and go save everyone from Gundam Zeta ending!
2+1: You jump in the Qubeley, and attempt to save everyone from the Gundam Zeta ending. Unfortunately, you just make the ending even worse with your Retcon.
>Become the 9.
6: You become 9. 7 gives you a look, and 8 says 'RUN AWAY!'
9 must roll to dodge!
1: 7 ate 9. Again.
Hero999 is dead!
> "May I please cause a little trouble for the others?" (Holds a Pokeball. It has "Magic" on it.)
6: "Trouble is the point of this game! And have a +2 to your next roll for causing it, that is limited to a 6 to avoid moving counters forward." Nuffle says.
>Turn Balrog into cat.
6+1 =7: You turn the Balrog into a cat. Unfortunately, this only makes it smaller and fuzzier. It is still just as mighty, and on fire, and evil. Except now it's as nible as a cat and fast and a smaller target!
Nuffle adds a counter.
> Fuck this card game shit. Kill the Rulesmaker with my rocket powered cane. THEN I WILL BECOME THE RULES!
D-dark sage could be cool if it were anime rules maybe okay no it couldn't SHUTUP :<
3: You attempt to kill the Rulesmaster, but he holds up the card 'Negate Attack' and your rockets stop.
"You know nothing of the reality of this Children's Card game, Shadoweh."
>Slack thirst with beer brewing.
1: Hell no! You'll keep looking for water!
>With your new-found luck, challenge Nuffle to a game of Yahtzee.
5+1 = 6: You roll the maximum points you can get in Yhatzee, while Nuffle rolls nothing of use. He promptly flips the table at you.
Massaca must Roll to Dodge!
2: The table smashes into you, and sends you back to the realm you came from, Seriously Wounded for your trouble.
Okay, just making sure since she's no longer on the NPC list.
> Take Yamame on a sightseeing trip around the world.
5+1=6: You take Yamame on a sightseeing trip. You go more than around the world, but around the Multiverse. The spider is impressed.
>Realize I've been doing nothing for an entire day while everyone has turned old.
6+1 = 7:
You channel your inner Joestar
(http://images.wikia.com/jjba/images/a/ab/Joseph-oh-my-god.jpg)
Meanwhile, Nuffle adds a counter
>Become stage 5 boss.
5: You become the strongest and most popular Stage 5 boss ever! You're sure to make Player Character status in Touhou 15! [+1 to next roll]
====
Balrog attacks Hater!
3: The Balrog's attack missed! It seems like it's not quite used to it's cat form yet.
Raikaria: Waste Turn to remove -1.
4-1: I waste my turn, but the -1 stays! [-1 to next roll]
====
Alive:
Modifiers:
Regret: -1 to next roll
Shim: +1 to next roll
Zakeri: +1 to next roll
FutureTurtle: +1 to next roll
Hater: +1 to next roll
Keegster: +2 to next roll. Capped at 6. Can only be targeted by a 6.
Juubi: +1 to next roll
O4rfish: +1 to next Roll *Expires next round*
Injuries:
Dormio: 2 Turns remaining
Massaca: 2 turns remaining
Unmatched Sock: HEALED!
Other:
LaserTurtle: Can command PresentTurtle and FutureTurtle
Undead:
UncertainJakutten [2nd Life]: Is a Lich, by sacrificeing his 1st life. 3's on dodges are 4's. 2's on dodges are 3's. 1's are still 1's. On death is Perma-Dead.
2nd Life:
Pesco
Dead:
Hero999 [Eaten by 7]
NNR's army of 1,000 Kittengirls [Death by wubs]
Other:
Yamame: Impressed
Nuffle: Angry that he lost a game of dice, how does that even work?
Raikaria: -1 to next roll
Kuuybey: Watching PX...
The Balrog: Still on a rampage in Doom-Cat form
Gundam Fight: Still raging, except Zeta's ending got even worse
====
You may now perform Game-Enders. The following will end the game:
- All players being dead simultaneously, except the commander
- Apocalyptic scenarios [Ie: Destruction of the Multiverse]
- Killing me
- Killing Nuffle
- Destroying the Thread
There are 3/6 counters placed. Upon there being 6 counters, Nuffle will be able to intervene in the game once, and he is not bound by any rules, for he IS the rules. You won't like that.
====
Balrog: Attack 3d6 /4 rounded up players at random.
Raikaria: Cast Cleanse to remove -1 roll, using class trait: First Cast
===
DAY 5 BEGINS
Raikaria: Cast Cleanse
2-1: I cast Ignite instead
Raikaria must Roll to Dodge!
3: Damnit, will I ever remove this -1? And why am I running Cleanse/Ignite anyway? I must be playing Kassidin or something. [-1 to next roll]
Day 5: Battle with the Balrog
[/b]
>Consume the life essence of any nearby ice fairies. That should help me overcome these minor burns.
6: You consume the Ice fairies nearby. Literally. This makes you overcome the burns, but also gives you ice powers! Who says overshoots are ALWAYS bad?
Dormio is healed!
>Attempt to add a Counter myself. SUMMON THE NUFFLE.
3: Nuffle says no. No-one touches his counters. Not even me.
>You're really bad at reading comprehension :|
As for the phylactery, thingy that makes me immortal unless someone finds and destroys it, is what I meant.
>Hide said phylactery in way so elaborate that I myself can't find it.
4-1 = 3: You hide away the phylactery in a place where 'You can't find it'. Because you forgot where it is! Ahha!
> Eeeew what kind of hardy Kassadin goes without his Flash? >:C
> My loyal Wraiths! We must banish this demon scourge at once! Use Harm Touch on Balrog and defeat him by default!
Edit: You mean you'll find an infant mentioned in a prophecy and fail to kill him and leave a fraction of your soul in him, Uncertain? :V
A bad one. [I do not actually play Flashless Kassa, and if you're getting C.C'ed and need cleanse you're doing it wrong]
4: You call forth a bunch of wraiths, which use Harm Touch on the Balrog-Kitten
Balrog must Roll to Dodge!
3: The kitten gets clipped by one of the Wraiths. However, simply 'harming' does little. [-1 to next roll]
>Attempt to sell baked goods and delicious drinks to the other players. Entrepreneurship is sure to give me powers!
6: Not only are you successful, but you somehow manage to make PX not own something money can buy at the same time! That in itself is a superpower!
> Swiss roll
6: You do a Swiss Roll. In fact, you do two. You are somewhat stuffed.
>PresentTurtle: Spray the balrog-kitten with a fire extinguisher! Who knows? It might work...
>FutureTurtle: REBUILD CIVILIZATION!
PresentTurtle: 1: You spray the Kitten with a Fire Extinguisher. It just turns to steam and blasts back at you.
PresentTurtle must Roll to Dodge!
5: You evade the jet of steam, and somehow end up behind the Kitten of Death [+1 to next roll]
FutureTurtle: 3+1=4: You rebuild civilisation, in a time and science-defying way, involving you spontaneously spewing fourth civilization. You guess it's a side-effect of Timey-Wimey Stuff.
Well, there's that kibosh'd, time for plan b!
>Acquire Kitten-balrog as Shikigami!
4: You acquire the Kitten-Balrog as a Shikigami, somehow. The link between you two makes it no longer consider you an enemy, and it loses it's -1 to next roll due to your power.
You may command the Kitten-Balrog from D6 onwards.
> Screw this shenanigans! I'm getting a drink.
3: You get a drink, but fail to ignore the shenanigans.
>Magical idol army
1: You create an army of brutish trolls.
> Attack Raikaria with all the spellcards. ALL OF THEM. One at a time, of course.
3: Nope, you can't target me on anything but a 6. Kinda have to penetrate the Multiverse.
Gundam Zeta has the most downerest ending ever and I made it worse :derp:
>Get drunk with Unfortunate
5: Apparently, being drunk makes you strong! [+1 to next roll!]
> Crit all the animes for a OHKO
4+1 =5: You crit all the animes, for a OHKO, with splash damage from the crit alone. Luckily your Crazy Hobo decided to do what you wanted! [+1 to next roll]
>Befriend Nuffle and have him heal your wounds. Best to be nice. Try not to gloat. Seriously.
5: What Nuffle Giveth, Nuffle Taketh Away. In this case, your beating.
Massaca is Healed!
>Make spellcards to prepare for the imminent boss battle.
3-1 = 2: You make Icicle Fall -Easy-. You don't think this one even counts.
>Cheer up Shim with judicious application of the Dubstep Gun upon his person!
2: You spend the turn reloading the Dubstep Gun
>Use the Xbox One's evil powers to trap everyone in a simulation with aliens.
1+1=2: No-one else has an XBox One to use to trap them with.
But what about Victory Gundam?
> Attempt to return the Zeta Gundam ending to normal.
4: You succeed. Downer Endings, Ahoy!
"Just look at this battlefield! So much chaos, and even a Balrog! It's no wonder Cabalvision has the highest first-quarter revenues in Gensokyo."
*mnch smack* Sorry Bob, what were you saying?"
"I w... Are you eating a dead catgirl?!"
"Kittengirl. Delicious and nutritious!"
"Bleh! And they say vampires have disgusting eating habits."
1+1=2: I don't care Jim! You should try one. They're at least 50% human blood, after all!
>Pet the Balrog
6: You pet the Balrog. Unfortunately, it is hyper-violent. And on Fire.
Smashy must Roll to dodge!
4: You pull your hand away before it burns off.
>every kitten is kittengirls
(http://i.imgur.com/zBr8vAD.png)
>Purvis kills them.
(http://i.imgur.com/C3hFFbW.png)
Purvis must be murdered with the vengeance of 1000 kittengirls
6: You channel the fury of 1,000 Kitengirls, upon yourself, and strike out at Purvis.
Purvis must Roll to Dodge!
2: Too preoccupired with reloading the Dubstep Gun, NNR rips into Purvis with the force of 1,000 Kittengirls.
He somehow lives.
Purvis is Seriously Injured!
However, channeling the pure fury of 1,000 Kittengirls has a strong effect on the mind....
NNR must roll to dodge!
5: NNR resists and suppresses the fury, and stays in control. In fact, he seems to have gained control over the fury. [+1 to next roll for KITTENGIRL FURY]
>Make Raikaria read The Silmarillion.
4: Not a 6. Too bad, I'm immune to everything but 6's. Cool book though.
>Equip Shim.
3: You try to equip Shim, but the homeless man is clingy.
Roll to Equip Shim!
Homelass Man: 3 v 2 :Zeng
The Homeless Man wins the battle over Shim.
"Ok, thanks!" I throw the Pokeball. "Go, Magic!" The Ball lands in the middle of the field. It was a Gyrados. It uses Surf, possibly attacking everyone within Magic's range.
6+ 0 = 6: You unleash 'Magic' upon the World, and it uses Surf. Nuffle amplifies it, so everyone will need to Roll to Dodge the Tidal Wave at the end of the turn, except FutureTurtle.
> Shield Yamame from all unpleasantness that comes in her direction this day.
4: Yamane is protected.
> Must have more defense. Leaf Shield!
1+1=2: The leaves burn away thanks to the Balrog.
> Jam my Seven Tools of the Bandit into the Rulemaker's face, along with my rocket cane. "I AM THE CARD GAMES!"
3: You do so, but notice your Rocket Cane only has 500 atk, while you just paid 1,000.
...Really 7?!
>Eat everything that resembles a 7.
1: Ya'know, if you take the curve out of a 9....
Hero999 must roll to dodge!
1: I don't even.... you ate yourself. As a ghost.
Hero999 is Deadbooked!
=====
Balrog: Attack 3d6/4 rounded up players at random
1+6+4 = 11
11 /4 = 3.75 -> 4
D 30 4 times: [30 being because I'm too lazy to count posts]
6 - Pesco
11 - Juubi
15 - Regret
15 - Ignore
29 - Ignore
5 - Unmatched Sock
Pesco: 3 - The Balrog's claws deal some light damage, causing a -1 to next roll
Juubi - 5 - You evade the Balrog's flames, and get into a good position [+1]
Regret - 1 - The Balrog eats you. Icicle Fall be damned.
Regret has died!
Sock - 3: You are clipped by the fire launched at Juubi, and take minor damage [-1]
TIDAL WAVE!
Dormio - 2: The wave slashes you into the wall of the cave. That hurt. Dormio is Seriously Wounded. Again!
Validon98 - 6 - You ride the wave!
Magic must Roll to Dodge!
3: Magic takes a glanceing blow, putting it off-balance [-1]
Uncertain: 1: The wave destroys you and your Phlyactery
UncertainJakuten is Perma-Dead!
Raitaki: 1: You drown.
Raitaki has died!
Sock: 1-1=0: You die horribly
An unmatched Sock has died!
Nuffle adds a counter! [4/6]
Pesco: 1-1 =0: You drown too.
Pesco is Perma-Dead!
Nuffle adds a counter! [5/6]
PresentTurtle: 4+1: You can swim well, you are a turtle, after all! [+1]
Hanzo.K: 3: You get knocked around a little [-1]
Unfortunate: 6: Good thing you're not ignoreing everything!
Magic must Roll to Dodge!
4-1=3: Magic takes another strong blow, but not enough [-1]
PX: 1: You and your troll army drown
PX is dead!
Juubi: 3+1=4: Fire and water, nothing can stop you!
Phlegeth: 3+1=4: Being drunk makes you swim... better?
Shim: 3: Your hobo can't swim all that well, but lives! [-1]
Massaca: 4: You manage to get to high ground
Regret: You are already dead
Purvis: 1: Oh my, this is a bad wave
Purvis is dead!
Hater: 4 : You can swim!
Kasu: 1: Dead
Kasu has died!
O4rfish: 4: O4rfishes can swim! So can Bloodbowl commentators!
Smashy: 3: The wave wears you out. [-1]
NNR: 1+1=2: Apparently cats can swim just well enough to not make you die. NNR is Seriously Injured!
Sourtori: 2: Sourtori is Seriously Injured!
Zeng: 4: Good thing you brought a surfboard!
Keegster: Immune
Kilgamayan: 6: POWER OF LOOOOVE!
Magic must Roll to dodge!
6-1 =5: Apparently Love isn't accurate. Either that or a Ground-type move.
Flandrdj: 1: Burnt Leafs are no protection
Flandrdj Scarlet has died!
Shadoweh: 5: Card games > Waves [+1]
The Balrog-Kitten: 3: It's hot, but not quite hot enough to not be effected. [-1]
====
Status:
Alive - Modifiers:
PresentTurtle: +1
Hanzo.K: -1
Shim: -1
Smashy: -1
Shadoweh: +1
Seriously Wounded:
Dormio [2]
NNR [2]
Sourtori [2]
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
Kasu
Purvis
PX
An Unmatched Sock
Regret
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
Other:
Yamame: Protected
Balrog-Kitten: Controlled by Hanzo.K. -1 to next roll
Magic: Out of P.P
Nuffle: Feels guilty for letting Magic happen
Me: Still waiting to lose his -1
Counters: 5/6
Hero999 wins the Darwin Award! [Be the cause of your own death and Perma-Death]
Keegster2 wins the Player Slaughter Award! And is then returned to the universe from whence he came, due to having done what he wanted.
====
Day 6 begins!
Raikaria: Remove -1
5-1=4: FINALLY.
===
Loads of Crititcal Failures on them rolls today. Well, if Nuffle Githeth what he Taketh Away, there should be 6's.
Day 6: A significantly Quieter Day
> I can never let someone attempt to get my cards wet again. It's time to ATTACK THE MOON!
1+1=2: But the tides going out of wack would make your cards wet...
>Accept the contract
6: Kyuubey gives you a contract which allows you to return to life in exchange for not interfering with him again.
PX is... ALLLLIVE!
Pet the Magic. Pet all of the Magic.
5: Apparently Gyrados like being petted
That's just unfair. I sell so much baked goods and delicious drinks, and I get drowned for it?! I don't think so, Tim.
>Reek unholy fury on Keegster as he reenters the Universe, and steal part of his soul to fix myself! I will not let this deed go unpunished!
Edit: Also, for future reference, the timer next to Serious Wound...is that countdown to die or countdown to heal? I just want to know in case I happen to live again.
4: You haunt Keegster. Unfortunately the dead cannot come back to life except on a 6.
>Gosh. Just freeze my wounds and be done with it.
1: You set yourself on fire to be done with it.
Dormio has died!
>Adapt Surfboard as weapon.
6: Adapting an already perfectly good weapon gives you the infinity +0 Blade; The ChainSurfSaw!
>Let's see about getting this Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami into something more Gensokyo-friendly! After all, any Shikigami of mine has to look the part!
Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami
>Ponder the meaning of life. Oh, and remember to pick up some eggs.
(Forgot about this.)
Hanko: 4-1 - The magic that turned the Balrog into a kitten is too strong!
Balrog: 1-1=0 You forget th e meaning of life. Meanwhile, the ground rumbles, and an evil laugh can be heard....
NUFFLE ADDS THE 6TH COUNTER.
>PresentTurtle: Find a safe spot and watch the madness.
>FutureTurtle: Upgrade the steamroller with materials acquired from the timey-wimey civilization.
PresentTurtle: 4+1 =5: You find safety on a hill. It's a good veiw too! [+1]
FutureTurtle: 4: Upgrade complete. Your Steamroller can now transform like an Autobot.
Well that happened.
> Have a passing demon cast Samarecarm on me.
2: There is only Nuffle.
I don't like being wet >:(
>Attack the ocean in true drunken stupor
2: Too drunk... to...walk...
>hide
2: Axe-Clerics do not hide!
> Sprout from a seed to begin anew! Such is the circle of life.
4: You cannot germinate unless on a 6.
Or 5+1
>Attempt to gank the Nami. With that many Tidal Wave kills that'll be a huge shut down!
1-1=0: Nami still has her Ult.
Smashy must Roll to Dodge!
5: You evade the very slow ultimate with a blink. [+1]
Nuffle starts a 2nd pile of counters. There is one here.
> Write and publish a book about shenanigans.
4: It's a great book, and sells OK for an unknown author.
> Change the world into a random Nintendo game.
6: SUPER SMASH BROTHERS BRAWL!
Oh wait that's no different really.
>Convince Hina and Tewi to take all your misfortune, leaving you with only luck, and lots of it.
1: They take all of your luck. [-1 to all rolls, natural 6 will still be a 6]
>Revive with 8 lives remaining. Cats are awesome.
6: You revive with 4.5 lives remaining. You don't get to screw the rules.
RegretDesi... is... ALLLIVE!
> "Magic, get back!" Magic is returned to it's Pokeball, unharmed, but out of PP to use Surf. "Go, Flare!" (I'm a Pok?mon Trainer, so whenever I get attacked, my Pok?mon try to protect me!)
> "Sorry, everyone, it's not my fault! It's Nuffle's! He's the one who made Magic cause a Tsunami! Be mad at him, not me!"
Also, I am in the same Universe as everyone else now, am I?
4: You swap out to Flare. Which is a who knows. I'll say Flareon.
People remain annoyed. Especially the dead ones.
>Return as the drowned ghost of funk, tied to the Dubstep Gun
1: You return as the dehydrated ghost of opera, tied to Gio Comprendeo.
But, regardless, Purvis... is... allllive! Kinda.
> Distract Keegster so Yamame can sneak up behind him and poison him in retribution for trying to separate us.
2: "But he didn't intend to separate us." Yamane says.
>Kill orphans. They attacked me first.
3: No they didn't. Regardless, you kill them.
You then feel immense guilt, as an angry mob comes at you.
Captain Infinity mst Roll to Dodge!
2: The mob buys your excuse, and let you live with Serious Wounds
>Surf.
5: Surfing Ghosts are awesome
>Lick wounds and heal.
1: Apparently your tongue is infected.
NNR must roll to Dodge!
1: You get infected and die.
NNR is dead!
> For the mighty leaders of the Necropolis, death is but an instrument!
> Return from death, more powerful and malevolent than ever as a Lich Master!
2: Nope.
"Tidal wave! Did the College approve this?"
"Actually Jim, Gensokyo has no institute of magical authority. Anyone can cast spells whenever they want."
"As we can see, this leads to utter chaos, and an exciting game."
"Yes, let's hope the fans feel the same way."
5: "Good thing every team can fly too! And the fans! We can take this match to the sky arena!"
"Not to mention the Star Player, freelancer Oni, Sukia is lifting the pitch!"
+1
>Since you're like obvs BFF with Nuffle now, earnestly request to apprentice under He, the God of Fortune (and everything). At the very least you may be able to hang out at his joint in the meantime. Maybe.
3: "No."
> obtain the shiniest meat bicycle
5-1=4: Super Meat... Bicycle!
====
Modifiers:
PresentTurtle: +1
Smashy: +1
Juubi Neion: Perma -1, except on 6's
Injured:
Sourtori: 1
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
Kasu
An Unmatched Sock
Dormio
NNR
2nd Life:
Purvis
PX
Regret
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
Other:
Yamame: Nothing important
Balrog-Kitten: Forgot the meaning of life
Nuffle: Rolling up Sleeves
Me: Watching Nuffle with fear.
=====
There are 7 counters! Nuffle spends 6 to use his divine powers to CHANGE THE RULES OF THE GAME!
The dice are my game, the rules are me, all I have to do is feel like a twist, and the rules change, you see. Also I have a lot of money and I had green hair before I went grey. - Nuffle
Nuffle changes the Die into BLOCK DICE FOR 2 ROUNDS.
1 = Attacker Down - Same as before. Natural 1's are immune to + modifiers.
2 = Both Down - You will succeed, but with repercussions. Any actions which are usually 6+ will fail and be treated as if a 1 was rolled. On a RtD, these count as a -1 to next roll.
3~4: Push: Nothing happens of note. A 3 will not kill injured players on a Roll to dodge.
5: Defender Stumbles: Success, this applies to things which are usually 6+ as well. If you want to revive, or try to cause a GAME END, then this is a good time!
6: Defender Down: Critical Success/Overshoot, depending on action. Natural 6's are immune to - modifiers.
=====
DAY 7 BEGINS
BLOCK DICE ARE IN USE
Due to being busy tomorrow this day will last 48 hours. Feel free to ask any questions about the new die.
Day the 7th: NUFFLE'S PERSONAL DICE
>Controlling ice wasn't cool enough anyway. Since I clearly set myself on fire to harness the power of fire, resurrect as an anthropomorphic phoenix.
6 - With a mighty screech and a flash of fire, you are reborn!
DORMIO....IS.... ALIVE!
>Re-recruit the dead souls of the 1000 kittengirls to enact vengeance on the living.
4: Nothing happens. You cannot find their souls. Did the Wubs destroy them, or are they just not here?
> Revive through the initiation of Ragnarok.
2: Ragnarok strikes you. Being dead, you don't die. [-1]
>Be the other guy.
5-1=4: You are the other guy. But luck is bound to you.
>Challenge the Super Player to a game of soccer. To the death.
5: You challenge the Super Player to a game to Blood-Soccer. You win. He dies.
Roll to Dodge is back, and I never heard!? BLASPHEMY!
>In the middle of another grassy field, huh? Something about a right drubbing comes to mind before a bunch of colour, but... Just try and find some eye-glasses for your crappy sight.
3: It's not easy finding glasses when you can't see.
>Try to possess the Flareon remotely. Because why waste effort wrestling with consciousness manually. Plus, fire fire burny burny :3
1: Your attempt to possess something just spreads your mind too thin, and you stop thinking.
An Unmatched Sock is Perma-Dead!
> strip the flesh
2: You strip some of your flesh by accident, and then proceed to salt the wound. It hurts. [-1]
>PresentTurtle: THIS +1 COUNTER GUARANTEES SUCCESS! Establish communications with FutureTurtle
>FutureTurtle: Use transformer-steamroller to destroy the BUST OF EINSTEIN and re-enable time travel
3+1=4: You established communications. Somehow. They are not that stable.
2: Your steamroller attacks the Bust, but, it comes to life with the power of NERD RAGE. The steamroller destroys the BUST OF EINSTEIN, but the steamroller looks at you, before exploding from the fight.
>Proceed to fire a Trueshot Barrage
2+1=3: You fire a Trueshot Barrage to clear toplane.
> Oh wait wrong game
> Remember that I'm actually Karthus, and Requiem ALL the things while the passive rolls!
> Proof I'm still on passive and not really dead:
5: You press R. Anyone who rolls a 1 after this event today will have to roll to dodge.
Then you fall over dead.
Hm, that failed. Oh well, back to the drawing board!
>Let's just go hide out somewhere with the new Shikigami.
Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami
> Remember EVERYTHING.
Hanzo: 4 - You hide in the cave you are already in. It's kinda not easy to find.
Balrog: 2: The Balrog cannot remember how to remember!
> Empower Yamame to join the game with her own independent actions and rolls.
5: Yamane joined the game!
She's not really independent, however. She's under your command. I'm too lazy to make her independent, and even then, she wouldn't be. She'd just be my proxy.
Profesora Google' gives me no hits for Gio Comprendeo =[
>Practice tenor. On....the dice say: Hanzo!
3: You practice your Tenor. It's average.
>Lie around and wait for a Smash Ball to come near my person
3: A Smash Ball floats somewhat near.
> Set the world in Sudden Death.
3: Nuffle says no.
> "What? At least he doesn't know Heat Wave!"
> Notice a Smash Ball and break it.
2: You do not notice a Smash Ball
>MUWAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHA! DIE THE DEATH OF DEADS WITH DOOM! BAHAHAHAHA!
2: No-one dies today. At least, not by your hand.
Wait, if I have a half life, does that mean that I'm not alive or dead, or do I just need to get more life shards?
>DO THE WINDY THING
Also, it may be a good idea to take note of the other 3.5 lives I have after this one.
2: The exchange rate of Cat lifes to human lives is 3.5:1. 3.5 cat lives left means you're on your last one.
As for the Windy Thing, you do it but sprain your ankle. [-1]
>Abuse loophole in contract to grant me another life
4: Sorry, you needed a 5+.
> Escape the forum.
1: You seal all the exits, and magically chain yourself to the forum. THERE IS NO ESCAPE.
A red laser appears above you, mixed with Raitaki's laughter
3: You have enough HP to survive Requiem.
>Join the game as the previously mentioned Smash Ball and dodge his attempts to break me.
4: You are now a Smash Ball. You have nothing to dodge.
> Test the Chainsurfboard on an unwilling tree.
1: The tree is particually unwilling, and grabs it, and chainsurfboards you!
Zenga must Roll to dodge!
5: You evade the Chainsurfboard and snatch it back. [+1] However, you notice a red line...
REQUIEM
5+1=6: You activate Hourglass to avoid Requiem. Unfortunately, Raitaki is already dead, so you cannot counter. So I'll just give you a +2 to next roll.
> God damn card games. Try turning Dark Sage into a Dungeon Dice Monster instead.
1: "KEEP THAT ARC AWAY FROM MY DICE!" Nuffle screams in terror, as a red line appears above Shadoweh...
Shadoweh must roll to dodge!
2: Shadoweh is reduced to 1 HP by Requiem.
Shadoweh is Critically Injured!
>Guilt? Time to purge my emotions, they'd only get in the way especially since I'm injured.
3: You purge your emotions. However, you're not sure if they were in the way or not.
====
Modifiers:
Kasu: -1
Regret: -1
Zenga: +2
Juubi Neion: Perma -1, except on 6's
Bonus Characters:
Turtle: Futureturtle
Kliga: Yamane
Hanzo.K: Kitten Balrog
Injured:
Shadoweh: 2
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
Kasu
An Unmatched Sock
NNR
Raitaki
2nd Life:
Purvis
PX
Regret
Raitaki
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
Other:
Yamame: Now under control of Kliga
Balrog-Kitten: Forgot how to remember stuff now
Nuffle: Baby-talking his dice. He seems to be murmuring about how he won't let 'That Duke near you'.
Me: Watching Nuffle with confusion.
====
Block Dice rules are in effect for 1 more turn. They managed to not change *too* much this time, but who knows?
Sourtori's wounds healed.
Day 8 begins
Everyone feels a slight chill. Something is coming. It will arrive at the end of Turn 10. This arrival cannot be prevented, as this thing[these things] have the abilty: PLOT ARMOR, however, feel free to prepare, or try and find out what it is, or whatever.
>PresentTurtle: Prepare for as much as possible
>FutureTurtle: Pull PresentTurtle and his steamroller into the future with you! It's the only way to avoid the dreaded PLOT!
steamrollerbot you will be missed ;_;
Day 8: A day of not a lot
>Take on the title of Super Player and try to use its powers to figure out the chill.
2: You take on the title of Super Player! However, you are too busy being accosted by fangirls for this title that you cannot asertain the nature of the chill. The squees are so frustrating you get a -1 to your next roll until you can shoo them away.
>I hate spiders. Every spider should just burn in a fire. And my new form should be used to realize that ultimatum. Therefore, I will set Yamame alight.
3: You attempt to set Yamane alight.
Yamane must Roll to dodge!
3: She manages to extinguish the flames quickly with webbing, but is a little stung. [-1]
> Punch the space-time continuum in frustration.
6-1=5: You punch Space-Time.... that's good stress relief. [+1]
Space-Time must roll to dodge!
4: It withstands the punch. Good thing, if it rolled a 1 it would be gameover.
>Looks like there's not enough time to scrounge around for eyewear. Try and find a weapon or some magic books or something.
2: You find a weapon. Under your knee. You broke it while looking for it. It was a magic wand.
>Design Skill: Unlimited Chainsurfboard Works.
5+2=7:
Your Reality Marble exceeds Unlimited Blade Works in size, since it is focused on one item. Your power also exceeds any other... and Unlimited Chainsurfboard Works becomes seperate from you. It engulfs the world. Everything is Unlimited Chainsurfboards.
Nuffle adds a counter. [2/6]
>Become the wind Miko
2: You become the only wind Miko. This makes Sanae angry, and she attacks you.
PX must roll to dodge!
4: Sanae's accuracy has apparently fell now she's not a miko.
> Put my pain into your soul
1: You put my pain into your soul. FELL THE PAIN OF LOST BLOODBOWL, LOL AND DOTA GAMES!
theshim must Roll to dodge!
4: Apparently you can withstand my summer-NEET wangust.
> Make it rain dragons with jetpacks.
4: WHAT THE FUUUUU-
> Transcend reality.
5: You transcend reality. You become an existence outside of reality. You see me and Nuffle.
>PresentTurtle: Prepare for as much as possible
>FutureTurtle: Pull PresentTurtle and his steamroller into the future with you! It's the only way to avoid the dreaded PLOT!
steamrollerbot you will be missed ;_;
PresentTurtle: 6: You become Bert Gummer. You have seen Tremors, right? If not, well, a doll of him is the picture for this trope: Crazy Survivalist (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CrazySurvivalist)
Future: 6: You pull PresentTurtle into the future. A bit too far. You slingshot him into 400 years from his time, instead of 300.
PresentTurtle is now called 400Turtle
FutureTurtle is now 300Turtle
I DO NOT YET BEAR THE MARK OF PERMA-DEATH! I MUST TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS SITUATION!
>STOP TRYING TO POSSESS AND START THINKING AGAIN!!! I MUST NOT GIVE UP!!!
6: Oh, thanks for pointing that out.
An Unmatched Sock is Perma-Dead. For real.
>Throw closest player at Smash Ball/Labuto
5: You throw Labuto at the ground, after all, he *is* the cloest player.
Labuto must Roll to dodge!
1: Labuto is burst open and dies!
Phelgreth can use a Final Smash! The effects of this are secret! Must be used within the next 2 turns or it fades.
> Use the gold gained from ulting top to buy a Last Whisper
6: You buy a Black Cleaver instead. It gives CDR, and you're Blue Ezreal, after all. It must work! Right?
>The other guy has undefined powers, therefore he has powers of the undefined. Undefine something, preferably your bad luck.
5-1=4~: Besides the fact that the one with the powers of the undefined is a girl, Nue, it works.
Juubi is no longer cursed!
>Zombies eat brains. Evil ass ghosts bite hearts. Logically speaking, an opera wraith would devour voices! Go devour....Shadoweh's voice, say the dice!
@ Bolded: Wat.
6: You steal everyone's voice. And hearing.
> Kilga: Dump a bucket of water on Dormio.
> Yamame: Call in Kisume for assistance!
5: You dump a bucket of water on Dormio.
Dormio must roll to not smoulder out!
4: The water evaporates.
6: You call in Kisume AND Parsee.
>Develop a cure for rap.
5: You find the Dubstep Gun, fully loaded with Wubs.
> Pah, I missed. Oh well.
> Watch the minimalp intently, pinging for Hanzo and Hater to stay out of danger!
4: You ping wildly, towards the unidentified enemy champion incoming.
>Use a spellcard.
5: You use a rip-off of Peerless Wind God. The short spellcard lets you keep some energy in reserve, and the survival aspect makes you not get hurt! [+1]
>Get a nice ice-cold glass of pink lemonade.
1: You get a red-hot glass of hot chocolate.
B-b-but dungeon dice monsters were THE FUTURE!
> Activate Future Fusion to ready the Five-Headed Dragon for the upcoming apocalypse.
5: You summon the Five-Headed Dragon, and it gives you such a confidence boost! [+1]
"Jim, I have realized a disturbing trend."
"I know what you're going to say Bob. I just didn't want to say it out loud."
"Well, it's disgraceful! Most of the injuries and deaths are ... are self-inflicted!"
"Yep. The sport just isn't what it used to be."
"Not to mention"
"Yep. No touchdowns."
"I can't even tell if any yards have been gained on the plays!"
6: Just on demand, people start to score touchdowns, and upon the bloodbowl pitch, non-self-inflicted injuries start to happen. This is shaping up to beone of the greatest matches ever.
>Well, there's only one thing left to do! Get my hands on a pair of Potara Earrings!
Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami
>Ponder the chaos that's occurring.
1: You learn the Fusion Dance.
5: You ponder. You actually get somewhere with your pondering for once, and get a +1 for happy.
> Notice I have only 5 Pok?mon.
> "A wild SHINY Chibi Nazrin appears!"
> Catch her!
5: You catch a Shiny Chibi Nazrin. [+1]
Harness the power of the extra life to become half human, half ghost, and half cat.
3: Three halves isn't doable.
====
Modifiers:
Kasu: +1
Regret: +1
Shadoweh: +1
Keegster: +1
Kitten-Balrog: +1
Yamane: -1
Phlegeth: Can use a Final Smash [2]
Unfortunate: Can only be targeted by a 6 due to being outside of reality.
Bonus Characters:
Turtle: 300turtle, normal self is 400turtle
Kliga: Yamane, Yamane's actions count Kisume and Parsee
Hanzo.K: Kitten Balrog
Injured:
Shadoweh: 1
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
Kasu
NNR
Raitaki
Labuto
2nd Life:
Purvis
PX
Regret
Raitaki
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
An Unmatched Sock
Other:
Yamame: Minor burns [-1], called allies
Balrog-Kitten: Pondering [+1]
Nuffle: Now on 2/6 counters
Me: Watching ??? approach
====
Normal dice are back in effect
Day 9 begins
Everyone feels a slight chill. Something is coming. It will arrive at the end of Turn 10. This arrival cannot be prevented, as this thing[these things] have the abilty: PLOT ARMOR, however, feel free to prepare, or try and find out what it is, or whatever.
Day 9: THE [EARLIER THAN SCHEDULED] ARRIVAL
> Sell boots (they are for plebeians) to get enough money to buy back into the game!
2: You cannot sell while dead!
> Use the space-time continuum to come back alive.
1+1=2: You sure are lucky you had a +1, eh?
>Summon Tornado around me as protection
5: You have a Tornado around you, as well as various rubble and things protecting you! It's better than expected! +1
> Tap 8 Plains, and 4 Islands. Play 4 Walls of Denial. (Magic the Gathering) Use these to protect against the coming plot device.
6: You tap all the cards. While you cannot stop the Plot Device, you can shield yourself from it.
Juubi is immune to the Plot Device!
>I feel a slight chill? Nonsense. How could I possibly feel a chill when I am an embodiment of heat?
4: Because the chill isn't the sort of chill from cold... but from being watched...
> Ride the dragons with jetpacks and fly with greatness.
6: THIS IS AWESOME! You never want to get off! [Seriously]
>Did I overwrite the world? Shiiiiit. Find out what happened to Gaia.
6: You find out what happened to all of the incarnations of Gaia in every media possible. Spoilers.
> Buzz Axe Rampage
5: You go on a Buzz-Axe rampage, complete with the explode at the end. The explode will render you 'dead' for a turn, before you automatically revive. This will NOT count as a 'Death', as it is a Borderlands style-death. 3 random posters will be attacked at the end of the post.
A chill? Must be because I'm wet. DAMN YOU OCEAN! I almost forgot all about you!
>Use Final Smash on the ocean!
4: You use a Final Smash on the Ocean
The Ocean must Roll to dodge with a -1 Modifier!
5-1=4: Even the might of a Final Smash cannot harm the Ocean.
>Attempt to obtain this so called 'plot armor' reviving in the process.
3: 'Plot Armor' is unobtainable.
>Use the screaming fans to block me from the chill. Somehow.
1: The screaming fans attract the chill. It is drawn to screams. It will arrive at the end of this turn instead of Turn 10.
> Kilga: Heal Yamame's burns to get rid of that -1 modifier. (As well as the damage done to her name in the most recent update.)
> Yamame: Use own thread to knit sweaters for the current party of 4 so they're not so cold anymore.
2: You are not an Axe-Cleric
3-1=2: You are too busy overcoming pain! And being amused at Kiga's lack of Axe-Clericness.
>300Turtle: get information about the future-er future from 400Turtle
>400Turtle: examine the future-er future. Is the civilization still there?
5: You learn in the Future, everyone lives underwater. +1
4: Civilization is there, just underwater. Global Warming.
>Invoke global ice age.
1: You invoke a global Fire-apocalpse!
Everyone must Roll to dodge at the end of the update [After Buzz-Axe, before Plot]
>This isn't working out too well. You need your ultimate "I'm totally a protagonist you guys" weapon: The Ironfoam Blade! Summon it up out of thin air like any good protagonist would.
6: You summon the +10 Masterwork Ironfoam Blade with maximum enchantment slots, and the abilty to shift between the three primary elements, Fire, Ice, and Lightling. Any offensive commands made while wielding this fine weapon will garner a +1, however, a 1 will always be treated as a 1. A 6 will not gain a +1.
> Watch the shenanigans happen.
> I hope you and Nuffle don't mind me staying here for a bit. :V
4: Nuffle careth not. Yet.
>Devour all the stolen aspects, and prepare to all the gained power toward the F.I.N.A.L.A.R.I.A.
1: You return all of the stolen objects.
>Exterminate all spiders. Because they are spiders.
3: You step on a spider. It's the only one you can find. You're too lazy. 3's don't allow genocide.
>Me: Attack Purvis.
>Jim and Bob: watch in frustrated silence. Attack Purvis also.
2: Purvis gave your voice back. No point attacking, back to Bloodbowl!
Actually there's a huge-ass spider in the basement so for once I support these anti-spidernanigans. ;_; THERE ARE SMALLER ONES THAT COME UPSTAIRS AND I FOUND ONE ON THE COUCH WHEN I WOKE UP AAAAAAAA
> Imbue the Five-Headed Dragon with its own actions so it can fight the apocalypse itself.
1: The Five-headed Dragon scoffs at your attempts to empower it, and become your minion. It instead eats you, and takes over your character!
Shadoweh is now the Five-Headed Dragon!
Well, only one thing to do.
>Meditate inside the cavern to attain even greater power! After all, all those old hermits and sages do it, so I can too!
Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami
>Ponder what master is doing, maybe we'll get stronger too!
6: You meditate so hard you become a Hermit.
2+1: You ponder, but pondering grants no power.
Just as long as you call MIA on any humanoid or excessively large spiders we'll be fine.
> Make sure the Pulsefire systems are ok as we head back to lane.
3: They are functional, but the Trueshot Barrage is still on cooldown. Also it keeps asking if you need a map. Also, the edges of your digitized FoV are flickering...
Is everyone still really old or did that get reversed?
>Create a small millitia made up entirely of people in sidetails
5: You create a medium-sized milita. [+1]
IRL stuff got me stuck the last few times I wanted to make a post. Sorry.
>Throw uncontrollable random number generator at Nuffle with a pouty face.
6: It's uncontrollable alright! It goes where you don't want it to and misses completely!
Nuffle laughs.
> Appreciate my good luck.
> Name the Shiny Chibi Nazrin "Mansion Mouse". (It's a Luigi's Mansion reference)
> Use Mansion Mouse to dowse the nearby area for treasure.
2+1=3: You name the Shiny Nazrin. However, you can only make one action per turn, and this is clearly 2, 2 and a half with appreciating your luck.
>Attempt to neutralize the Kitten-Balrog-Shikigami while it is distracted.
6+1 =7: You attack the Kitten-Balrog
Kiten-Balrog must Roll to Dodge!
1: It is too distracted, the is killed before it can react.
The Kitten-Balrog is dead!
=====
Buzz-Axe Rampage!
18: O4rfish- 3: An axe glances the side of your cheek. That hurts! [-1]
15: Unfortunate - Roll to Hit = 1, Immune.
21: Smashy - You easily evade the Axe, and notice incoming fire.... [+1]
The Shim is in Limbo!
Fire everywhere!
PX: 5: You put out the fire around you with your tornado.
Juubi Neion: 6: Fire? I laugh!
The Fire must roll to not be stopped!
5: The fire can't really get a +1
Dormio: 5: You evade and get an easy +1
Hater: 5: TOO AWESOME FOR FIRE [+1]
ZengaRin Kaenbyou: 2: The fire, it burns! [Seriously Injured]
Phlegeth: 5: Good thing you're near the sea.. +1
Validon98: 1: You burn. As you burn, you see what you attracted, and cannot even scream...
Validon98 is DEEEEAD
Kilgamayan: 2: The fire gives you SERIOUS WOUNDS
Yamane: 1: Unfortunately, Yamane is even unluckier. YAMANE IS DEAD
Sourtori - 5: You started the fire :3 [+1]
Patorikku: 3: You suffer a -1 to your next roll
Purvijiri: 3: -1
Captain Infinity: 2: Seriously Wounded!
O4rfish: 5-1=4: You evade the fire
Shadoweh: 4: Dragons care not for fire!
Hanzo K: 5: Your Hermit-self can easily put out fire with magic!
Smashy: 3+1: Good thing you saw the fire in advance!
Momijibot: 4: You are your milita escape the flames.
Massaca: 2: Your Uncontrollable RNG knocks you out of the flames in time to prevent death, but you are still SERIOUSLY WOUNDED
Keegster2: 1: Dead
RegretDesi: 6: You escape the flames, and pour tons of water on them!
Flames: 6: This just fuels the fire!
Regret: 6: Seriously?
Flames: 4: The flames give up, seeing as you are the last guy to burn anyway.
====
(http://th04.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/f/2012/225/5/a/slenderman_by_kezikiv-d53zmx1.png)
He has arrived. Everywhere, simultaneously. He has been stalking you all.
Boss Fight: Slenderman, begins
Rules: Every player is being stalked by fragments of the Slenderman, cloned and split to stalk every player by THE FINAL BOSS. Attacking Slender will only remove the Slender stalking you, not anyone else. For every Slender that dies, 'Slenderman' will lose a percentage of his HP, based on the total players posting that round, and the amount who are not being stalked anymore.
You may also try other things other than combat to stop your Slender Fragment stalking you, although these will require a 5+/6+, or some other test, to be successful, based on the action. Still, better odds than a 4+ followed by a 1 from Slender. Any Slender who is no longer stalking a player will count towards his HP loss.
Any Slenders stalking players will attack the players they are stalking at the end of the day. This will cause an automatic RtD. There is no need to roll for an action for Slender.
Even players not in the current time are not safe.
Players who are dead are not stalked, but do not count to Slender's HP loss. If they revive while this event is active, they will become stalked.
If Slender, or a Proxy, will Perma-Death you, you may use your next action to instead become a Proxy. Slender will regain 10% HP if you do this, but you will live again. However, you will attack a random player at the end of each day until the event ends. If there is no-one but Proxies alive, Slender, and any Proxies, win the game.
Currently Perma-Dead players have this turn to choose to be Proxies. However, they will not give Slender any more HP, and they will return to being Perma-Dead if Slender loses. Basically, if you wanna screw over the guys still alive, dead people, feel free!
Note you cannot change your mind after the first turn after Perma-Death, or the first round of this event. You either accept to be a Proxy, or you decline. Proxies created by Slender/Proxy kills will not return to being dead upon Slender's defeat, they will return to normal, 2nd life status.
Example: 20% of players are no longer stalked by Slender. Slender will lose 20% HP before he attacks. The next round, 40% are not, and he loses 40%, going to 40% HP. Any gains to HP from Proxies happen before removals.
Upon Slender's defeat, there will begin a 7 turn countdown to the 2nd boss. There are 3 bosses, the 3rd being THE FINAL BOSS. Defeating THE FINAL BOSS will end the game, and all players not Perma-Dead win.
There is one other way to defeat Slender, but this will remain a secret. However, I will tell you that each time you perform this action successfully, Slender will lose 13% HP. The number is a hint.
Feel free to ask questions about this boss, and I will answer, except about the nature of this 13% removal.
Slender HP: 100%
Status:
Modifiers:
Unfortunate: Can only be targeted by a 6 due to being outside of reality.
Patorikku: -1, +1 for any offensive actions [Critical Uneffected]
Smashy: +1
Phlegeth: +1
Dormio: +1
Hater: +1
Bonus Characters:
Turtle: 300turtle, normal self is 400turtle
Kliga: Yamane
Hanzo.K: The Balrog [Revival will revive it as such]
Injured:
ZengaRin Kaenbyou [2]
Kilgamayan [2]
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
Kasu
NNR
Raitaki
Labuto
Yamane
The Balrog
Keegster2
Validon98
2nd Life:
Purvis
PX
Regret
Raitaki
Limbo:
The Shim [Cannot act this turn, but will revive at the end of next turn for free]
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
An Unmatched Sock
Other:
Nuffle: 3/6 Counters
Me: Watching Slender Arrive.
Slenderman: 100% HP
Proxies:
None
Day 10 begins
> (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkvsTsn_PRQ)DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH!
<DIE THE DEATH!>
<SENTENCE TO DEATH!>
<GREAT EQUALIZER IS THE DEATH!>
>MURDER DEATH
<DIE THE DEATH!>
<SENTENCE TO DEATH!>
<GREAT EQUALIZER IS THE DEATH>!
The trial is FINISHED. FINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHEDFINISHED
> See if the... whoever that was... left anything behind.
2: It has left nothing behind.
>300Turtle: Woo! I don't even know what happened! Level up with the victory experience!
>400Turtle: Idle for hat drops. Hopefully, I'll get that Balloonicorn!
1: You level down. You are now 300Turtle -1
4: You idle for hat drops. You get The Team Captain. Not a Baloonicorn, but hey, that's not a 'hat' parsay.
> (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkvsTsn_PRQ)DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! DEATH!
<DIE THE DEATH!>
<SENTENCE TO DEATH!>
<GREAT EQUALIZER IS THE DEATH!>
>MURDER DEATH
1: Death murders you!
PX must roll to dodge!
5: Death's 'attack' doesn't do anything except give you a few extra years on your life. Apparently he's bad at attacking things that are alive. Who knew! [+1]
>Demand that Death bring him back to life while he has him at his mercy.
2: Death scoffs, calling your bluff, and points out of you kill him, you get deadbooked by default anyway.
>Well, if you're dead, you're probably a ghost, which means you can try to pester alive people to do stuff! Go pester someone to revive you!
5: You pester someone to revive you. Specifically, you pester Nuffle. He obliges.
Patorikku is ALLLIVE
>Celebrate return to life by helping Komachi recover. One good turn deserves another!
1: You 'celebrate' by handing the slacker over to Eiki.
>Build a fortress of greatness with my dragons with jetpacks.
6: It's so awesome that every other local fortress gangs up against yours!
Hater must RtD!
4: Too awesome to hurt!
> Unruly vagabonds plotting to overthrow Death? Unacceptable!
> Reap the souls of everyone trying to kill Death >:C
1: You decide to add a +1 onto any rolls aimed at killing death as assistance this turn.
Too bad PX already went.
>Use enlightenment to transcend to CATGIRL HEAVEN
I'll be sad if I can't do this action because PX tried to kill death before I could post.
3: You ascend to Catgirl Heaven, but it's pretty empty. Weirdly enough.
Well that was a good day.
>Set traps al over boss spawnpoints.
2: The boss spawnpoints are not set. You cannot trap them.
Haha Slender killed me the turn before he died ;_;
> ACTIVATE FACE-DOWN CARD! CALL OF THE HAUNTED! REBORN FIVE-HEADED DRAGON WHO IS ALSO ME!
(Also UK should have revived at the same time as Purvis for loyalty sake yes?)
4: You have 0 LP, how can you activate a trap card?
>I wonder if it hurts to be resurrected into a body that's already been burnt to a crisp. Whatever, not my problem. I want more things to burn. Let's finish off Sourtori.
Resurrection gives you a new body.
Besides;
5: SOURTORI MUST RtD!
1: Dormio reaps Sourtori in whatever way Dormio sees fit. Sourtori is DEEEEAD
Welp, wasn't expecting this.
By the way, do I still have that RtD of six modifier because of transcending reality?
> Engineer a conspiracy to stop anybody from killing Death.
I think you got kicked out because Nuffle got bored at one point.
6: You engineer a conspiracy, but it's a crazy Raikaria-mafia conspiracy theory and gets a lynch wagon on you!
RtD
1: Someone quickhammers, you flip town, but you're dead.
Unfortunate is DEEEEEAD
>Let out a war cry, boosting all players moral and buffing their strength, endurance, and agility 15%
3: Unfortunately, stats are rounded down, and 15% isn't enough to make a difference in a 1/6 incremental scale.
>Burn dread. All of the dread.
1: I don't even know.
Well, it's a good thing I rolled a 6 the turn he died, huh?
>Find Regret.
5: You find Regret in record time! [+1]
>Wander the relams of the dead
5+1=6: you find a light....
Labuto is ALLLIVE!
> Light the fuses
2: You have no fuses, you ran out of dynamite and grenades.
> Gather info on the next boss's weaknesses.
5: You find out it is related to the ocean and space simultaneously. You're not sure if this is a weakness or not, but it's something.
>Produce Ghostbusters 3.
6: You leave the script and it is found after your death. It works so great you are revived to produce more films!
Sourtori is ALLLIVE [in record time!]
>Melt wizard with thrown Hot-cocoa.
2: There is no wizard to melt!
>Give Nuffle some fuzzy dice
2: Nuffle is not amused and burns the 'Heretic Dice'
>By the power of Queen (and Sidetails), I shall put a stop to your tomfoolery!
Question for the person below me: Why am I doing this?
4: You put a stop to it, only to find there was nothing to stop.
> Kilga: Add Parsee as a die-controlled playable character under Kilga's control.
> Yamame: Add Kisume as a die-controlled playable character under Purvis' control.
3: Parsee is too Paru-Paru to command!
3: Kisume is too shy to take par herself.
=====
Turns until the Space-Sea thing comes: 6
Modifiers:
Juubi [+1]
PX [+1]
Wounded:
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
NNR
The Balrog
Keegster2
Validon98
Captain Infinity
Shadoweh
Unfortunate
2nd Life:
PX
Regret
Raitaki [You were on both dead and here, so admin error lets you live!]
Kasu
Yamane
Kilgamayan
ZengaRin
Purvis
Sourtori
Patorikku
Labuto
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
An Unmatched Sock
Other:
Nuffle: 5/6 Counters
Me: Apologetic for delays
Space-Sea thing: Approaching Fast
>Spawn a dwarf-style catgirl fortress for me and all the other catgirls to live in and use as defense against the next boss.
6: You complete your Dwarf Fortress. Unfortunately, there is one thing that is compulsive to all overseers of Dwarf Fortresses. Cage all the cats so they cannot multiply. At least you're not butchering them.
Oh God did I just screw everything up?
> Amass dakka.
5: You amass a lot of Dakka. And when you run out of Dakka to amass you use your Dakka to make BIGGER DAKKA.
>Jigger the candies converter to convert all catgirls into gerbilgirls.
1: You change all Girbilgirls into Catgirls.
..Well, that was....'interesting'. But I'm not gonna turn down an extra Shikigami!
>Commence gathering reagents to revive the Balrog! After all, a Hermit's Shikigami should be just as immortal, and being dead is a problem for that!
4: You find an etheral flame.
>Ara? Fine, then save the life of a random person
3: There is no-one to save!
>Key? Where we're going, we don't need keys! POWER IT UP THROUGH WILL POWER!
4: WILL POWER. THE UNIVERSAL FUEL!
>Dry up the sea.
2: The sea is too big, and you are too small and cold.
NOOOOOO
> Roll a 1 and make Nuffle add a counter!
3: ERROR: LOGIC PARADOX. IN ROLLING A 1 YOU WOULD DO THE OPPOSITE.
>tally alive people
5: Technically it's impossible, population is always changin' but just subtract the number of dead people from seven billion.
>Sacrifice the title of Super Player in order to live again.
2: You cannot change titles while dead!
> Ascend to Yukari levels of scheming and trolling.
3: You ascend to Yuyuko levels of scheming and trolling. CLOSE ENOUGH.
>You never did get any glasses, did you? Go get a pair already. Of glasses. Try and find some that have some water resist, too, since the next boss is water-related.
It's only suicide if it's not low-health execution...
1: You destroy all water goggles in the world.
>Pull a random planet towards our now quarter sized planet
2: You pull Pluto. At which point Nuffle reminds you Pluto is not a planet, and invalidates your action.
As it seems that this guy does not like fun, he would likely find some bs excuse to burn energy, too.
No I am not touching any ideas involving a Mana Void on someone like Garen. Yet.
> Fire a Trueshot Barrage at the closest low-HP ancient golem. Clearly, a good method to countering mana loss is a good amount of mana gain.
2: You don't have the mana for a Trueshot Barrage! And even then, you can't oneshot the golem!
>Wonder why I would require a match or any other fire starting instrument when I have my own body. Whatever, affirm my existence by turning my surroundings into a volcanic region.
5: Because you dislike rubbing your body on things.
Besides that, you make a nice volcanic region, and feel right at home. [+1]
>Calling it now. Neon Light Illusion.
5: Nope. Not even the right game.
The fact that Yukari told me the answer so easily means that we've either established rapport, or she's just feeling helpful.
>Ask Yukari politely to give you information on each of the next bosses weaknesses.
5: Yukari tells you that the weak spot of the next boss is 'The tip of it's snout'. However, she states the FINAL BOSS has no weakness.
>300Turtle: I can do anything! Repair steamrollerbot!
>400Turtle: Steal a Minishark!
6+1=7: You make STEAMROLLERBOT PRIME. Nuffle adds a 6th counter!
4: Here, have a minishark for some reason.
STOP COPYPASTING MY WAIFU'S TYPOED NAME
> Kilga: Return the world to its normal size.
> Yamame: Channel our righteous indignation at being excommunicated by our kind into everything we do, bestowing upon us a permanent +1 to all rolls (unless they are 1s).
1: NO.
Kilga: 5: The world returns to normal size, with none of the damage expected of such sudden growth and shrinking!
Yamame: 6: Well, I guess I gotta give that to her :V. Also you don't add a 1 to a 6. Criticals always ignore modifiers.
I-is the final boss the mafia? :ohdear:
> Use Exchange to grab the next boss from the Final Boss's hand and give him a Kuriboh instead.
3: The FINAL BOSS is immune to being tampered with.
>Fire danmaku-fireworks.
1: You fire the most dull, boring danmaku ever. And that's an accomplishment!
>Declare national headphones day.
3: You declare National Headphones Day. No-one knows which nation.
>Bake Nuffle the best cupcake ever!
3: Nuffle takes the cupcake and eats it. Unfortunately, Nuffle prefers the CATACLYSM MUFFIN.
"Halftime! It's halftime everybody! Look at the band marching in-- Jim I never knew you played the violin."
"Someone dropped it. I think it's all right, even though it's badly dented."
*squaaang ooruuuw bwaaaaa*
"IT may be all right, but we should get YOU checked over."
Note: it looks like a violin, because an ogre is holding it.
2: But isn't Bob the Ogre and Jim the Vampire?
Kill Next Boss.
2: CONTRACTUAL BOSS IMMUNITY. NO-SELLS DEATH.
> Pull Raikaria and Nuffle to our game dimension with the power of b-ball.
5: Nuffle uses No-Sell, even your 5's are useless!
> Silence the voices
4: Your melee attacks are far more powerful now, and will get a -1 modifier on any RtD from them. However, you will have to pass a Silence the Voices roll yourself when you attack, and on a 1, you attack yourself instead, with the same -1 modifier!
===
Turns until the Space-Sea thing comes: 4
Modifiers:
Dormio: +1
theshim: Silence the Voices; -1 modifier on any rolls to dodge from a melee attack from Shim. Must pass a Silence Roll, on a 1 he attacks himself instead.
Yamame: +1 to all rolls, Criticals excluded.
Wounded:
Dead:
Flandrdj Scarlet
The Balrog
Keegster2
Validon98
Captain Infinity
Shadoweh
Unfortunate
2nd Life:
PX
Regret
Raitaki [You were on both dead and here, so admin error lets you live!]
Kasu
Yamame
Kilgamayan
ZengaRin
Purvis
Sourtori
Patorikku
Labuto
NNR
Perma-Dead:
Pesco
Uncertain Jakutten
Hero999
An Unmatched Sock
Other:
Nuffle: 6/6 Counters
Me: Apologetic for delays
Space-Sea thing: Checking if it's sonar is working
====
DROP THE BASS!
4: GLOBAL RE-ROLL! IF YOU ROLL A 1, ONCE THIS NEXT DAY, YOU WILL GET A FREE RE-ROLL!
Nuffle has 6 counters!
Nuffle chuckles.
"You know, we need to make up for lost time. Now then, if I move the cosmos' peices like that, the boss can reach earth with a Go For It Roll, which it passes...."
====
WARNING!
A HUGE BATTLESHIP, LIGHTLING CORONATUS IS APPROACHING FAST!
(http://fc06.deviantart.net/fs27/f/2008/186/f/c/Lightning_Coronatus_by_thraxllisylia.jpg)
With that fanfare out of the way, lightling arcs in the sky, before multiple supernatural bolts strike each other, and a giant mechanical seahorse appears.
LIGHTLING CORONATUS' RULES
Lightling Coronatus is a simpler boss than Slenderman was.
Rule #1: Lightling Coronatus will have a HP bar like Slender. Damage will be done based on successful actions and failed dodges.
Rule #2: Lightling Coronatus does not instantly die from a 1 on a Roll to Dodge, but will take heavy damage. On a 6, he will counter-attack and absorb the attack to recharge his shielding somewhat!
Rule #3: Lightling Coronatus will take damage based on three factors:
1: What actually hits him [Warning: It is possible to HEAL Coronatus, or give it shields! Think before you attack!]
2: Your roll, a 6 will do more than a 4!
3: His Roll to Dodge.
Rule #4: Lightling Coronatus will recharge his shields every turn, sheilds are 30% of his maximum HP, The shield must be broken before he can take actual damage. This shield stacks, so failing to break it ill result in it getting stronger!
Rule #5: Only combat can dispatch this boss. Non-combat methods will fail due to Contractual Boss Immunity.
Rule #6: At the end of each turn, Lightling Coronatus will attack 2d6 alive players.
Rule #7: On defeat, any players perma-deathed by Coronatus will get a Roll to Revive. This roll is a 4+ On a 3- you stay deadbooked!
Rule #8: Coronatus wins if all players are dead/perma-dead at once. Alternatively, if it's shields reach 100%, it will transfer them into a devestateing blast of lightling at the planet's core, and instantly kill everyone, thus fufilling wincon #1.
Status:
Hull: 100%
Shields: 30%