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Dimension #13: Marisa's Boomness
Marisa stared at the survey on her desk. It was relatively basic; fill out who you think fits the description, most votes gets a title. She had done this last year as well, when she had first entered high school. It shouldn't have been so hard, and yet... Things had changed. Marisa and her fellow second years had gained reputations, and things had simply changed. There were no other words to describe it, they had changed, changed drastically, and nothing else could describe it. Marisa shook her head wildly, her single side braid smacking her face. She couldn't let this get her down. Marisa FREAKING Kirisame bowed to no one and nothing.....
She stared at the first question and picked up her pen, analyzing it with an expert eye; if there was no answer, then she'd make one up herself. Determination filled her. The Witch of Red Dreams wouldn't lose to a piece of paper!!
Who and who do you think makes the cutest couple?
Marisa tapped her jaw thoughtfully. There were lots of couples in Gensoukyo All-Girls. Too many to properly count; after all, quite a lot of people had their own harems, knowingly or obliviously. Marisa smiled, inspiration striking her as she recalled something she had come across the other day. Class 2A's most devious girl grinned and scribbled down a few things in the blank.
Okay, next question... Stupidest...?
Marisa hurriedly scribbled down 'Everyone's a manipulative bitch, it seems' and moved on.
If you could trade lives with anyone at school, who would you trade with?
Marisa's smile grew into a full blown sadistic grin. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see one of the two class representatives, Kochiya Sanae, shiver in apprehension.
Oh ho, now this is getting interesting... Next question~! Most musically talented! .... The new band, The Nineballs!!!
Marisa's grin grew to the point of where it rivaled the Cheshire Cat's. She was having a lot of fun now; the possibilities were stretching out before her! She quickly read the next question, and unhesitatingly wrote with a flourish. As Marisa continued down the two-page survey, her little flourishes soon changed to the point where it looked as though she was slashing the paper with her fountain pen. Ink flew onto her desk, but Marisa ignored it. Her black and white uniform was about to turn completely black, but still Marisa didn't care. She had never thought of it this way, but with this survey, she could turn anyone into whatever she thought they should have been, instead of what they really were. Marisa never knew that making up rumors was this fun; in fact, she was considering joining the Newspaper Club just for the sole purpose of doing what she was now; gossiping.
Ahahahahahaaha!!!! Man, is this what it feels like to be the head honcho? The big man on campus? The mother fuc--
"Times up girls, hand in your surveys." Marisa looked up in shock. She had not known that time had passed so quickly. The Mad Witch opened her mouth to object, before thinking better of it and meekly handing in her papers with the rest of the class. The teacher, Kanako-sensei, raised her brows in surprise. "Why, Marisa, your rather submissive for someone who looked like they were giving their all for the survey...." The class chuckled as a whole while Marisa gritted her teeth in anger.
Well, let her have her moment. My survey will wipe that smirk off her face, no doubt!!
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Yukari looked at the pile of surveys on her desk and sighed. Ran had dragged her out of bed to read and tally up the votes from the survey, and Yukari had mixed feelings. On one hand, it was fun and entertaining to read the answers and guess (with terrifying accuracy) what students were thinking when they wrote down what they did. On the other hand, it was so hard to look through all the surveys, and in the end, Yukari was just lazy.
Well, lets try to make the enjoyment worth more than the pain... Let's start with Reimu!
Who and who do you think makes the cutest couple? : I hope to marry Sanae. The food of a loving (and rich) wife tastes the best, after all.
Yukari's smile fell. She didn't know what was worst; the fact that Reimu had chosen Sanae, or the fact that Reimu was marrying for money. Yukari sighed, and put Reimu's survey off to the side to read later. The most important question had been disappointing to the point of heartbreaking (or at least in Yukari's perspective) and the principal of Gensoukyo All-Girls needed to read something funny to get her mind off. Yukari picked up the next survey and noted the perfect hand writing.
Ms. Margatroid's for sure, lets see... I'll take a chance and look at 'Stupidest'...... Kirisame Marisa...? Oh ho, so she does like the witch!!
Yukari smiled and looked back at the first question, hoping that maybe, the answer wouldn't be...
Reimu and Sanae.
Yukari's gaze darkened visibly. "... Why does this keep showing up? Is there something interesting about that couple, something that I'm missing out on?" Then she read the text under Alice's decision. "Ah.. So that's it. Clever, clever girl. No wonder why her harem's so large."
You know Principal, I personally think you and Reimu would look good together, but you're too old, so you could be a sex offender if you really went for her.
Yukari read the rest of Alice's survey with more confidence, chuckling like the rich, old hag lady she was. When she finished, she placed the survey on a blank space on her desk, before picking up another survey. This one, Yukari noted, was written in a messy, but beautiful scrawl. It had ink splatters everywhere, but it wasn't too bad, thankfully. Yukari knew who's it was immediately.
Marisa. Your quite excitable this time around, aren't you...? Very well then let's see.... Cutest Couple....
Yukari choked on thin air as she read what Marisa had written. She began to cough, elegantly covering her mouth even as her face began to turn purple.
Ran suddenly poked her head into Yukari's office. "Ms. Yukari, are you alright!? Are you hurt or something?"
Yukari waved Ran away with her hand. "Kaff! No, no I'm alright. Kaff Kaff!!! Just read something ridiculous here. I'm fine."
"I swear Ms. Yukari, these surveys will be the death of us someday..." Ran withdrew her head, and Yukari could hear her footsteps as she went back to her desk.
After Yukari got her coughs under control, she turned her attention back to the matter at hand; Kirisame Marisa's ridiculous survey.
Cutest Couple: Mokou-tan with Keine and Kaguya!! Polygamy FOR THE WIN!!!
Yukari sighed. At least it wasn't Reimu and Sanae. In fact, she'd give points to Marisa for pointing it out; Yukari herself had noticed that both the NEET and the student-teacher had expressed great interest in the oblivious health-nut. The hag lady began to laugh. Then she stopped and clasped her hand into a prayer position.
I'm sorry Mokou-tan. Being the love interest of two VERY impure women.... I'm sorry.
Yukari looked at the next few questions and nodded to herself. They were rather absurd, but still within the boundaries of common sense. Just barely, of course.
Stupidest: Everyone's a manipulative bitchan idiot, but at the same time, manipulative bitches.
Switching Lives: Yukari. I want to be in charge!! I want to be the big boomy boomness!
Most Musically Talented: The Nineballs; The newest band on campus!!
Produce the cutest baby: Flandre and Suwako-sensei. Loli+Frog= Really cute shit!!
Most righteous: Eiki. But her legs are simply magnificent, so she's excused, da ze.
Weirdest: Everyone. But mostly Chen. Isn't she supposed to be in primary school? Why is she in high school?
Most Elegant: Yuuka. Sakuya is too airheaded at times.
Strongest: Cirno. Duh, who else could it be?
Most Photogenic: Momiji. Man, those panties!!! So WHITE!!!
Most Aggressive: Yuugi. Luckily for her, Parsee is just being tsundere. If our little bridge princess wasn't so tsundere, then Yuugi would be sued for dragging her off against poor Parsee's will.
Laziest: Yukari. Who spends half the day sleeping anyways? Whole twelve hours wasted, da ze. After you'd be Yuyuko, then China, then Komachi.Get off your ass if you don't want to be fat.
Most demonlike: Reimu; those armpits are just to perfect to be humanly possible.
And so the list continued. The logic was fairly solid, but as Yukari read, it grew messier and more perverted, and logic just flew right out the window.
Best dancer: Aki Shizuha, cuz I feel like it.
Most unlucky: Remilia-sensei, cuz she Charisma Breaks.
Magical Girl: Sakuya!!! Take out your PADS and be honest!!
Idol: Koishi, sign with me, I'll make you a celebrity!!
Then Yukari read the last comment, hastily scrawled onto the very last page. Yukari crumpled the paper and leaned back in her chair, rubbing her temples insistently.
Dear, Yukari. About your Reimu complex. Give up, you're way too old for reddie. Leave it to Sanae, you old hag. Go get hitched with some dandy old man at the bar. You need to get laid and forget about the delicious, delicious, ampit-flaunting shrine maiden, and her busty waifu. Seriously, get laid, or go take out Ran and go--
Yukari closed her eyes and blocked out the last part, for fear of scarring her mind.Then she steeled herself, and flipped back to the previous page. There she spot a small line of text. Yukari took out a magnifying glass from one of her many hidden pockets and examined it. Then her body shook with barely suppressed anger.
By the way, Yukari, when you say my name, I want you to say it like this. 'Marisssaaaaaaaaaaaahhhaaaaaa~'
A vein bulged on Yukari's forehead and hand. The survey shredded itself, and Yukari's eyes bulged with sheer anger as she smashed the intercom button.
"KIRISAME MARISAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! REPORT TO THE DEAN'S OFFICE NOOOOOOOWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Needless to say, Marisa didn't go to school for a week.
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Wow, I'm not sure what to say right now, except that it was hilarious. I haven't laughed this much in a while. Good job.
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Reading the answers Marisa put down really made me chuckle as I went down the list, it just goes to show how exploitable those things are. I was also able to get some insight on some aspects of life at the school there, which was nice. Hope to see more from you.
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Thanks; I picture Marisa as a very... Perverted person, but generally good, and a lot smarter than people give her credit for. And in this dimension, Cirno is a genius. Stupidly clever actually. Also, you won't be hearing from this high school in a while, next up is the life of the ace attorney, Fanatasy Maiden Reimu and her Justice for All!! A shorter version of my on permanent hiatus story.
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Dimension 2: Ace Attorney Fantasy Maiden Reimu And Her Justice For All!
Hakurei Reimu, defence attorney extraordinaire, twirled about on her spiny chair, a gift from a past client. She was bored out of her mind. It had been three and a half weeks since her last big trial, one where a legendary thief had been accused of stealing a precious thing, but it had all been resolved with evidence provided by a weird puppeteer. Although the case had turned out perfectly, no one had come into Hakurei and Co. to request her services. Chief Yukari had gone on hibernation vacation, and the EX-defence attorney Mima had gone to visit an old friend; an owner of some haunted castle called Makai, and Reimu was completely alone in the office. She had no one to bug, no one came over, and she had already done everything a bored person always did, like clean, replace the bathroom tiles, reorganize all the law books, learn Greek, dive into a burning building and save a baby.... Reimu had done it all, and now she had nothing to d--
BAAAAM!!!
The door was nearly ripped off its hinges at the sudden intrusion. Reimu stood up immediately, her hands slamming the table as she glared at the intruder in a mix of shock and anger. The intruder on the other hand....
"Are you a defence attorney?! You've gotta help us, my... my... my friends...!!" cried a short, green haired girl with her hair swept into a side ponytail.
"Please calm down; I can't help you if you're panicking like that. Sit, I'll make tea." Reimu headed into the kitchen, not stopping to see if the girl had bothered to listen.
"B-But, my frie--"
"Sit. Now. Cute little butt on the cushy leather chair. NOW." the girl found herself on the business end of the famed turnabout-inducing pointer finger. She sat.
"Good girl. So, tell me your name, your problem, and etc." Reimu rounded the corner and sat back down on her spiny chair, placing a tray of steaming tea and warm pastries onto the desk.
"Um... Okay, I'm Daiyousei.. I'm in this band... Called the Nineballers.... And I went on a business trip with another bandmember to negotiate a new album... But when I got back, two of my friends were in the hospital, and the guitarist was being accused of attacking them and sending them into a coma.... So I want to represent my friend who's in jail..."
".... Why is it ALWAYS comas? I mean, I'm lucky I rarely get murders, but still, it's uncanny how many comas I get...." Reimu muttered around a mouthful of pastry, one hand on her tea cup and the other around half a pastry.
"I-I'm sorry?"
"No, it's nothing," Reimu shoved the rest of the rest of the cake in her mouth, before mumbling, "sho, do uu ink at yur hwend ish gwuilty?"
"N-No!! Cirno is a little... headstrong, but she'd never hurt her friends!! Ever!! No matter how angry she gets, she's never hurt us!! Someone's trying to frame her!! I know it!!"
"Ai shee...." the girl in the red pinstripe suit swallowed her food, washing it down with some tea. "But, as for whether or not I'll take her.... I have to meet her, and see for myself. Go on and take me to her."
"Ah, um.. Okay!!" Daiyousei declared, eyes blazing with subdued determination.
"WAIT!!!" Reimu suddenly roared. "FINISH YOUR TEA!!!" Daiyousei complied, ignoring the burning heat.
Girls are traveling....
Reimu sat facing a short, angry-looking girl with a blue color scheme. The girl glared up at her, before looking away in a huff.
"So.. You're the accused?" drawled Reimu.
"Yeah. But I didn't do it!!" snapped the blue-haired girl. Reimu chuckled quietly to herself. "What's so funny!?"
"Sorry, my first client said that once. So anyways, tell me your name and your alibi; in fact, tell me everything about this case."
"I'm Cirno!! I'm the leader and guitarist of the Nineballers!! We were practicing in our studio, but then we had an argument about our newest song, 'Imperishable Night', and I got angry and went to the bathroom to cool off. When I got back, the window was cracked wide open and my guitar was out and Wriggle and Mystia, the bassist and vocalist, were unconscious! I tried to wake them up, but then the cops came and arrested me!! Then Dai and Rumia came back and.... Now here we are!"
Reimu reached into the collar of her slightly unbuttoned dress shirt and gripped her mini-yin-yang-orb, which had started to glow. "Cirno. I need to know... Are you guilty?"
Cirno snorted. "No. No way I would hurt my friends. We get into fights a lot, but we'd never do anything to hurt each other. We're family, and that's that!! Someone must have framed me!"
Reimu stared at her possible client. She saw no locks, so she had to bet that Cirno wasn't guilty. "Alright... I'll take you on as a client. But tell me more. Where is your studio, where can I see your bandmates, and I need to know. Why do you think someone would frame you? What would they gain?"
"I guess it has something to do with that battle of the bands that we won a few weeks back. It was a really close win; some people say that the judge was being biased, and one of the bands even swore revenge.... Yeah I guess that's it! revenge!"
"I see... I'll head over to your studio to see if I can get any evidence and stuff. I'll be back by the end of the day to talk to you, okay?" Reimu stood and headed towards the exit. "Daiyousei, come with me."
The girl who had been ignored the whole time looked up. "Eh..? O-Okay!"
Girls are traveling...
"So this is it, huh?" Reimu looked around at the crime scene, a spacious, one-room studio. There was a drum set, a keyboard, and several open instrument cases lying in the middle of the room, and behind them, there was a cracked window, just as Cirno said there would be. Reimu squatted and examined the instruments, starting with the drum. It was normal, if not a bit worn out. The bass on the other hand... The lower right side of the bass had some bloodstains. Undoubtedly this was the assault weapon. Reimu suddenly whistled as she caught sight of something on the ledge of the window.
"What's this? .....!!!!!!" Reimu dropped the note and slumped to her knees. "No... It can't be...."
"Ms. Attorney!?" Daiyousei rushed to Reimu's side. "What's wrong?"
"The paper... It's a calling card... The mark of the assassin known only as 'Merupo. She's after you guys... Shit...."
"Huh...? B-But why?! What did we ever do to her!?" asked Daiyousei.
"The name of the band you beat... Was it called the 'Prismrivers'?" Daiyousei nodded. "Well, Merupo is part of that band, as I've just recently found out. She's probably out for revenge.
"Wh-What now...?" Daiyousei's legs trembled. "Wriggle... Mystia... Rumia... Cirno...." Daiyousei began to sob as she collapsed onto her knees. "Guys.. What'll we do...?"
A strong, firm hand plopped itself onto the fragile, green-haired girl's shoulder. "Don't worry. After we collect some more evidence, I'll prove Cirno innocent and put Merupo behind bars, where she'll never hurt you guys." Reimu flashed Daiyousei a confident smile. "Don't worry. I'll get you out of this." Reimu suddenly whirled around and pointed at the ceiling. "Me, Ace Attorney, Hakurei Reimu!!"
"Umm... Okay.. so... let's gather evidence..."
Girls have gathered sufficient evidence...
Girls are confronting Cirno...
".... And that's about it." said Cirno, sighing as she leaned back. "I don't know how that offended the Prismrivers, but I guess that's what happened."
"I see...." Reimu muttered, her amber eyes glowing as the rest of her face was thrown into shadow. "Damn... We've only got one day left before the trial, and all of this still hasn't come together.. Damn!!"
"Well, I guess that's to be expec-----"
Bleeeeeeeeeepp
"What the heck?! I forgot to save!!" Kochiya Sanae smacked her DS Lite on her futon. "Damn, damn, damn! Now I have to restart the whole thing!! Ugh... Stupid game.... Forget it, I'll do it later... I've got to make dinner for Kanako-sama and Suwako-sama..." Sanae stood up and grumbled all the way to the kitchen.
As soon as Sanae left the room, a gap tore itself into the fabric of reality inside shrine maiden's room. A hand reached out and scooped up the discarded DS Lite. A chuckle came from the gap.
"Fufufu... Don't mind if I do~"
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^Will retype/finish tomorrow.
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All done with one short. Starting on new one tomorrow!
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Dear Miss Yakumo, if you are reading this, may I request you take over and become our new school principal?
That first one really got me. Now I wish my school had a lazy and funny principal like Yukari (lazy, yes but I wouldn't say my principal is 'cool')
Wait, so the ers actually BEAT the Prismrivers!? IMPOSSIBLE! Oh wait, it's just a game, in that case yeah sure why not...
I like your shorts, really make me chuckle when reading. Hope to see more :wikipedia: :wikipedia:
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How did the nineballers win the Battle of the Bands...? How did they even learn to play instruments? Mysteries of the Universe...
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I don't know, I consider this second short a half failure.
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I don't know, I consider this second short a half failure.
I don't see it as a half failure. I think it was pretty good. I was really just kidding about the Nineballers winning the battle of the bands. I hope I didn't bring your spirits down in any way. :ohdear:
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Dimension 98: Oh Shit, It's The Yama, And She's Kyuubey!!??
Eiki watched the gardener with a critical eye. The gardener had good form, and she was sturdy. Not to mention the fact that her primary colors were green; Eiki had spare green outfit that she wanted to get rid of. She knew for a fact that the gardener had a wish; all Eiki had to do was provoke the gardener to make that wish. Now, if only she could figure out how......
"Boooss.... Did ya find someone yeeeet??" Eiki looked up to see Komachi, her first contractee, scratching the back of her neck.
"I found a willing one, but... I'm not sure about whether or not to contract her. Her wish is a bit difficult to pull off."
"So, what's her wish?"
"..... To be called by her real name." Eiki sighed as she looked down on China Hong Meiling, who was now doing stretches.
"Eh... That lazy gateguard? Isn't she really unreliable...?" Komachi was wide awake now, peering over the Yama's shoulder to see Meiling reflected in the mirror.
"You are generally unreliable in doing your job, yet you turned out to be a relatively good Hell Rider. No doubt with a little motivation, she'll be just a good.
"Actually, Komachi, I need you to go to her now. Call her by her nickname if you will. Maybe being called 'China' by the only working person as lazy as herself will motivate her to make her wish."
"Cruel boss, real cruel. I'm off!!" Komachi disappeared in a whirlwind of dust and smoke, leaving Eiki to cough and watch as Komachi appeared on the screen of her mirror. Eiki focused a small amount of will, and soon her mirror began emmitting sound.
"Yo, China!! How's life?!" called Komachi, waving her hand about in the air.
Meiling visibly slumped. "Ah, I'm fine, thank you Onozuka-san. I'm a little upset by the fact that Sakuya-san refuses to call me by my real name, no matter how much I plead. Ojousama, Imouto-sama, Patchy.... Even Koakuma and the fairies by the lake!!"
"Maaaa, sucks to be you China!! Ah, maybe you should make an earnest wish over a higanbana! I hear that it has the powers to grant selected wishes!" China Meiling looked up at Komachi with an expression like that of a kicked puppy. "I'll be leaving now, so I'll see you when I see you!!"
Eiki released the energy trapped inside the mirror, letting it return to its original state. Not long after, Komachi materialized in the room.
"Howdit go boss? Did I do well?"
"Nice job Komachi. I suspect that she'll make her wish soon. For your effort, I'll excuse you most recent attempt to ditch work. Yes, that seems fair."
Eiki closed her eyes and tapped into her seemingly unlimited well of power. Seconds later, she heard what she wanted.
Please, please, from the bottom of my heart, make Yuyuko-sama stop eating people!!!
Eiki's eyes widened. Before she could stop it, her power concentrated itself and shot off in the form of an invisible spear. Eiki groaned as she realized she had chosen the wrong gardener in the first place.
My senses must be getting weak. At any rate, I hope Saigyouji doesn't mind going on a diet.
XXXXX
Youmu stopped sweeping. Myon had disappeared. Again. But Youmu couldn't feel the sharp, sudden pangs of pain that came with having your specteral half eaten. It was strange, really. If Yuyuko-sama hadn't eaten Myon then where had it go--
Myoooon!!
Youmu turned her head towards the pile of leaves that she had meticulously swept. She shoved her hands into the pile and rummaged about, before tugging out Myon by its tail.
Youmu sighed in relief. "Oh Myon, I thought Yuyuko-sama had eaten you! Speaking of Yuyuko-sama, where is sh--"
"KYAAAAAAA!!!!!!!"
"Yuyuko-sama!!" In an instant, Youmu had dashed to where Yuyuko was. Yuyuko was lying on her side, her face twisted into a strange expression.
"Youmu... I just had an epiphany.... Why do I eat people, when I could just eat beef and pork and rice and such? It seems..... Youmu?"
"Yuyuko-sama?"
"Would you be as kind as to get me a beef rice bowl? Youmu?"
"As you wish, Yuyuko-sama." Youmu dashed off to the kitchen, a small smile beginning to creep onto her face.
Now Yuyuko-sama will stop eating Myon!!
After Youmu had prepared a beef barrel bowl and delivered it to Yuyuko, she began to stroll down the halls of the mansion, watching as other ghosts floated about. Just as Youmu was about to go to her room and polish her swords, a whirlwind of smoke and dust exploded in front of her.
Youmu drew her wakizashi and katana, coughing as Myon flailed about. "Who's there!?"
"Easy now there, half ghost. I'm just a simple shinigami, y'see? And I've got somethin' to tell ya, so calm down."
Komachi stepped foward, her usual outfit traded for a loose, black and white top and slacks under a tattered overcoat and worn black boots. Her sythe was slung on her back, and her hands were up in a gesture of peace.
"Anyways, I need you to come with me. Boss has somthin' important to say, and it ain't a lecture."
"If I refuse?"
"Then we've got a problem."
Youmu shivered slightly. Komachi rarely made threats, and rarely broke out of her slow, lazy drawl. Something was happening, and Youmu wanted no part of it. But at the same time, The half-ghost couldn't ignore something like this. It was too suspicious, too strange.... So, the choice was clear. Even as that thought crossed her mind, her chest tightened, and Youmu coughed on reflex, liftin her hand to cover her mouth, dropping her wakizashi in the process. But then something even stranger than a serious Komachi occured.
Youmu couldn't stop coughing. She hacked and chocked as something made its way up her throat from her chest, and with a final cough, the thing dislodged itself and fell into her hand. It was a stone shogi piece, in a light silver color that Youmu found mesmerising. Carved in the center was Myon, or at least its outline. It was cold and pulsating slightly, but Youmu fould it far from repelant. The glow caused by the pulsing was quite pretty.
"Ah, boss was right!! It really does look like a shogi piece. To tell you the truth, I always thought that it looked more like a chibi Rod of Remorse." Komachi shifted and pushed the overcoat aside to reveal a similar item strapped to her stomach. Komachi's stone shogi piece was black, and it had a coin outlined in red at the center. It glowed slightly, and Youmu could distinctly tell that it was pulsating.
"Wh-What are these?" Youmu stared at the thing in her hand.
"Those are our Setters. It's sorta like... A generator if you will. Oh, you wouldn't know what that is. So I'll just have to give ya a manual explanaion I guess. You see, you made a wish over a higanbana, didn't you? Well, we; and when I saw we I mean boss, granted that wish. In return, you have to serve boss for a while, until you pay off your wish's worth. So we give you these, the Setters, which draw power from the elements around you, and all the energy that gets gathered is stored in there. You can also put energy in there, your own energy or otherwise. And you see, the Setters fuel our transformed selves, which basically means we get cool outfits and our powers get more aggressive. Ya followin'?"
Youmu nodded slowly. "But what does the Yama want with me?"
"Didn't I already say it? You made a wish, and she needs to collect payment for that wish. So you comin' peacefully, or do I have to force you?"
Youmu gripped her Setter. Almost as if by its own violition, her finger traced the Myon carving. The air around Youmu rippled, and Youmu found herself in an entirely different outfit. She was wearing a dark green silk vest over a short sleeved gray dress shirt. The gardener found her legs encased in a mildly form-fitting pair of navy pants. She had a pale yellow ascot. She looked for her swords, before reaching behond her neck and feeking an unfamiliar hilt. The half-ghost drew the swords; they were essentially the same swords, but the hilts had been modified slightly. The
katana's guard was longer on one side and the hilt was distinctly of European origin. The wakizashi's hilt on the other hand, was unchanged, if not a little longer. She tightened her grip on the swords.
"I believe that you'll have to make me. I do not wish to leave Yuyuko-sama for any period of time. For her sake and the sake of society."
"That's... I really do wonder what kind of view you've got of yer boss...." Komachi had wielded her sythe in the time it had taken for Youmu to transform. "Fine, let's go. I'll make boss proud and get a day off!!"
Youmu charged, dashing until she was just one foot away from the shinigami, and stabbed her katana through the wooden planks, using the sword's hilt as a pivot and back-flipping high into the air. She unhesitatingly used her wakizashi to perform a backwards stab, but her sword met no resistance. Youmu turned and looked around. There was no one there; it was as though no one had ever been there.
"Looking for me?" Komachi reached up from the shadow she had teleported into and gripped Youmu's ankles, before dragging her in. Youmu felt a strange sensation similar to being pulled through semi-liquid jelly, and closed her eyes. She regretted it. The air rushed by her at speeds Youmu didn't know were possible, an her heart leapt to her throat. Suddenly, it all stopped, and Youmu opened her eyes.
They were in someone's living quarters. It was filled with stall stacks of paper, and a large wooden desk lay in the center of the room. It was in front of this desk that Youmu found herself in front of. The back of the large leather chair was facing the shinigami and gardener. The chair whirled aroumd, and Youmu found herself facing the Yama.
"Nice work, Komachi. Very nice job. I'll talk to you later. For now, leave me and Ms. Konpaku alone."
"You got it boss."
XXXXX
Komachi left the room, grinning to herself. Konpaku was in for one hell of a time. Komachi thought back to when she was first initiated. Then her grin grew. It was, quite memorably the only lecture that Komachi had ever fully listened
to.
Komachi walked away for a nap near the Sanzu.
Welcome to the gang Konpaku; welcome to the gang.
Komachi pulled a pair of sunglasses from her shirt and put them on. "Yeah..... Looks like she's.... Got a lot to learn."
When she reached the river, Komachi put her arms behind her head and began snoozing, the sunglasses blocking the sun and allowing her to get some well-deserved rest.
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Ugh, this is what happens when I try to be serious. By the way, Mr. Rabi, it's no problem. Just keep reviewing. I'm having too much fun to be discouraged!! :( I hate the italicizing style. I have to retype.... And retype.... Oh yeah, if you're wondering what Youmu and Komachi looks like (my ability to describe stuff is sucky) then send me a message or something. If not, just ask here and I'll tell ya.
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I'm out of ideas. Someone tell me what to write about, before I go mad from inactivity!!
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How specific do you want our ideas to be?
I'd like to suggest some form of Lovecraft Lite.
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What on Earth is this 'Lovecraft' you speak of?
As for that, anything that isn't too perverted or something within the boundaries of my knowledge. There are no limits as long as I know something about it. Ah, if you want me to write about the girls in any anime-book-etc dimension, please give me a rough summary?
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Dimension 78: Reputations of Gensoukyo: Mokou-tan!
For the sake of preserving the identities of our informants, we have given them code names as well as altering their voices of blurring their faces. Please enjoy the show.
Sincerely, Moriya TV.
Ms. Yin-Yang, please give us your honest opinion on Mokou-tan.
Yeah, she does her job well and she lessens my load. And she doesn't cause too much trouble, so I won't be exterminating her any time soon.
Er... Ms. Yin-Yang, what about the fights with her eternal rival? Do those engagements not disturb the peace of the Bamboo Forest as well as the Human Village? Also, Mokou-tan is human, Ms. Yin-Yang. Comments?
Not within my jurisdiction. And, human or youkai, god or alien, Yama or Death Princess or half-half, I don't care. I protect Gensoukyo from any threat. And in return for my actions, I expect rewards. So DONATE already!!
Uh, yes, we'll keep that in mind, Ms. Yin-Yang. Now moving on to Ms. Master F'ing Spark. What is your opinion of Mokou-tan?
Hot damn!! That girl's harem is even weirder than mine!! I mean, over half the human village AND Eientei!! At this rate she'll start to catch up with me and reddie, ze!
.... I see.... Any other opinions Ms. Master F'ing Spark?
Yeah; hey! Mokou-tan, if you're watching this, lemme borrow some of your spell cards, ze!! Ah, hey, we should head out for drinks sometime! You and me could increase our power and our harems, da z--
Pichuu~n
Our apologies to the viewers, there were some technical difficulties. Now, onto the next person; a person from our own industry! How exciting!! Bringing in..... Miracle Fruit Girl!! Ms. Miracle, what do you find most interesting about Mokou-tan?
Eh...? Suwako-sama, you're acting really mature today. What's going on?
Who is this Suwako you speak of? Please answer the question, Ms. Miracle.
Eh...? Um, okay. I think that she has really long hair...?
........ Is.... Is that all....?
Um.... I.... admire..... her passion for being.... healthy....?
......................
.......................... Can I go home now, Suwako-sama...?
........ After this commercial break, we'll move onto Ms. Halfling!!
Eh...? Suwako-sama? What are you doing with that...? Suwako-sama? SUWAKO-SAMAAAAAAAA!!???!???
Pssst!! Suwako, the camera's still running!! Suwako!! Stop whacking our shrine maiden with your hat!! Hey, are you listening?
Commercial: Nitori's Tech Support!
Hey everyone! Having tech trouble? Give us a ring! We'll help you guaranteed!! Here's a comment from one of our satisfied customers!!
Nitori's Tech Support ruined my life; and the kappa she sent ate my shirikodama!!
NO. ABSOLUTELY. DO. NOT. WANT.
The day after Nitori's kappa came, my son fell sick with a fever!! And they didn't even fix my son's--
Beeeeeeeeeeeep
Sorry about that, we had a technical Uh Oh. At any rate, give us a ring if you ever need some help with you tech, or if you want to buy some!!
Nitori'sTechSupportisnotresponsibleforanymisfortunebefallingyou.Callatyourownrisk.ItemspurchasedaresubjecttospontaneouscombustionandothersuchtechnicalOopsies.
Call now!
Welcome back! We're at Hakugyokurou, interrogating our next vict--
The Youkai Mountain goddess? What are you doing here?
Ms. Halfling, please give us your honest opinion on Mokou-tan!!
What...? Fujiwara no Mokou? What on-- Oh, never mind. If I answer, will you not leave?
Sure!
Very well. I view Fujiwara no Mokou as a worthy opponent. She is surprisingly good with weapons, and she has an excellent sense of honor. I really admire her. It's a shame that she cannot enter Hakugyokurou. I think she would have made an excellent servant to Yuyuko-sama, overall.
Our first serious assessment of Mokou-tan!! Amazing!!
I have answered your question. Please leave, so that you do not incite Yuyuko-sama's appetite wrath. She's been hungry for frog as of late.
If she eats one, I'll kill her! Again! Ah! We'll be leaving now, no need to point that at us...
Thank you. Please, do not ever come again. At least, not with such a dubious heart.
..... Okay!! Hey, Kanako, switch me me, alright?
Yeah yeah. Hey! Careful, if you break that, we'll have to pay, Yukari a hefty sum if we want to get another one!
Yeah yeah.
Alright viewers!! We're now heading to the Scarlet Devil Mansion, where we will attempt to get Ms. PADS's opinion of Mokou-tan!! Please wait warmly and watch this short commercial while we travel.
Commercial: Youkai Mountain Gods!
Hi! This is Kagiyama Hina representing the gods of Youkai Mountain! You know, lately, we haven't been getting too much faith.
Gotta agree with that. Right big Sis? ... Sis... Where is she?
Maybe she faded away due to lack of faith.
WHAT!?!? Oh, no Sis! There has to be a way to bring her back right? Right?
Maybe if you gathered a lot of faith.....
Huh? Oh, right! I'll do my best, and sell lots of sweet potatoes in her name! Hopefully, I'll get enough faith to bring her back by the end of summer!
No one's gonna buy sweet potatoes in the middle of spring....
What!?!?
Please join the 'Bring Back Aki Shizuha' cause!! Please donate faith!!
Faith. Keeping Gods Alive Since Forever.
And we are back at the Scarlet Devil Mansion, where we JUST beat up the gateguard, Ms. Hong Meiling! Now, to find Ms. PADS and--
Who are you?
Eh...? Wha-!? It's the little sister of the SDM!! Ms.... Kyuu!
Kyuu...? I can go 'Kyuuu'?
Ah-!? No, no, no!! I just meant that that's what we'll be calling you!
Really? Well, okay.
Jeez Kanako, you're really bad at this.
Shut up, Swackers. So, Ms. Kyuu. Can you tell us where your chief maid is?
Sakuya? Oh she's--
You called, Young Master?
Ah, Sakuya! The creepy people want to talk to you! I'm going inside to play danmaku tag with Koa, so I'll see you later!
Ah.... Very.... Very good, Young Master.
So, Ms. PADS, what is your opinion on Mokou-tan?
.... What did you call me?
PADS. Now answer the question.
..... Very well. You are referring to the immortal watchguard of the Bamboo Forest?
Who else?
I remember encountering a sheep named 'Mokou' in the Human Village.
Well... Your opinion please!
Very well. She's... quite a pain to kill. But I rarely encounter her, so I don't really know what to say. I suppose she's a relatively good person, but a little thick in the head, I believe.
I see... Is that all?
Yes. Ah, you might want to duck.
What the--?!!
FUJIYAMA VOLCANO!!!!!
WHAA?!!
I shall be leaving now, to tend to my Mistress. If you'll excuse me.
The hell is this!?! What the fu--
Rest Omitted. Thank you for watching!!
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^Will finish tomorrow.
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You know, you might want to slow down a bit. You don't want to just absorb yourself completely; you get in over your head, and suddenly you don't like writing any more. Just, pace yourself, you know?
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...... One and a half a day? Just kidding. I'll take your advice and shove it down my throat. Thanks for the advice!!
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The sheer randomness in what I have just read is making me go :getdown: inside. That is all I can say.
:getdown:getdown::getdown:
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What on Earth is this 'Lovecraft' you speak of?
As for that, anything that isn't too perverted or something within the boundaries of my knowledge. There are no limits as long as I know something about it. Ah, if you want me to write about the girls in any anime-book-etc dimension, please give me a rough summary?
H.P. Lovecraft was a writer most famous for pioneering the genre known as the Cosmic Horror Story, which has been summarized by TVtropes as "When the universe is ruled by unspoken horrors who don?t care about us. " Lovecraft Lite is what happens when you make it less horrific, such as the webcomic Hello Cthulhu, which is a crossover of the Cthulhu mythos with Hello Kitty.
That being said, to my knowledge, cosmic horror stories are hard to do well, but Lovecraft Lite is easier because it's not quite so serious.
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I don't know, I consider this second short a half failure.
It's not a half failure. It was pretty good imo
You know, you might want to slow down a bit. You don't want to just absorb yourself completely; you get in over your head, and suddenly you don't like writing any more. Just, pace yourself, you know?
Yea, Squawkers is right. Don't use up every single idea you have and rapidly post shorts like a machine. Just take your time, take it easy. :yukkuri:
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Thanks!! I'll take my time getting ideas. As for Lovecraft, don't expect anything SOON. Someday, but nOt anytime soon.
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Honestly, I'd be a bit worried if you posted something Lovecraftian too quickly.
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I guess I would be too. Would pretty much signify that I had no life, ne?
Also.... I'm working on one of my longest and most serious shorts, so I'll not be posting as much. Maybe finish up or touch up on a story or two!
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Well, it wasn't that you'd have no life that'd be worrying me if you could come up with some cosmic horror story real quick...
A longer story? I look forward to it.
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I did too, but at this rate, it won't be out until Thursday. But I updated the Moriya TV gag for laughs. Nearly choked writing it. Or at least the commercials. The interviews aren't really that funny. :(
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Looking forward to Thursday and the new short :V
Oh and is it just me, or does Nitori sound a little like nigahiga?
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Was inspired when my sis was listening to Children's Bop.
But mostly by Kappa Net Nitori.
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Am thinking of doing a Mahou Sensei Mima (or someone) short. (or mini series.) Tell me your character thoughts please!!
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Anyone who was expecting a Thursday update.....
I'M SO SORRY!! THE STORY MAY BE DELAYED UNTIL SATURDAY!!!! I'M SO SORRY!! MAY STILL COME OUT TODAY!!!
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It's perfectly fine. It's not like our lives hinge on your every move. :3
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I know, but it 's bad to not do something you said you'd do.
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Fair enough. Still, I think we'll live.
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Aye, I'll work on it tomorrow, and I guess it'll do for kickin off the beginning of 8th grade. Anyways, for the Mahou Sensei Mima story.... Character choices or blends? Post them here or PM me, whatever. Got an opinion? Let it rip and I'll write it!!
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Dimension 999: The Final Stand; There will Never be Buses in Gensoukyo
Cirno?s eyes darted from left to right as she ducked behind the pillar. She ignored the blood, carnage, and icicles behind her as she reloaded her Nitori-Perfect-Freezer.
It was the 5th year of the Gensou-Outsider War, and things had just turned grim, or at least, grimmer than usual. Flandre Scarlet and Cirno?s comrade Mystia had just been kidnapped by the Outsiders. Captain Fujiwara had sent her, Lieutenant Cirno, to recover the two. Cirno grimaced as she prepped her ice-themed gun for the bloodshed to come. She checked her equipment. There was her gun, of course. And she still had several bombs; three for regular, Master Spark-esque explosions and one for a suicide bombing. After she finished, the ice fairy?s grimace grew as she thought back to how the war started.
The Outsiders had been drilling underwater for oil. They had set off a bomb, a bomb that had broken the Barrier. Cirno had seen it herself, watched as the multicolored force field had shattered into millions of flashing pieces before disappearing as they neared the ground. When the humans that had caused the Barrier to break finally realized what they had stumbled across, they had immediately made it known that they had found a supernatural, illusionary country. Soon all sorts of people began pouring into Gensoukyo, from scientists and doctors to contractors and business men, all looking to scrape some sort of material gain from the ?newly discovered? Japan sized- land that had materialized before them.
Of course their greed had gotten the better of them, and, sooner than anyone ever expected, they began looting and kidnapping, making off with goods, humans, fairies, youkai, and even a god or two. Hakurei Reimu had tried to stop them, but she had been whacked over the head and added to Outsider spoils.
Naturally, a very angry Yakumo Yukari confronted them, blasting the offenders into puny pieces and reclaiming the shrine maiden. It only got worst from there. Before Yukari could conjure up a new barrier, the human war machines rumbled right over the ruins of the Hakurei Shrine (it had been destroyed by the blast; Reimu had been elsewhere at the time) and headed straight for the Garden of the Sun.
Kazami Yuuka naturally obliterated them. But that only served to motivate the humans, and they unleashed all sorts of unpleasant weapons on them. Thankfully, the Underground youkai came to their above-ground counter parts and Okuu had managed to ward off the nuclear bombs and prevent fallout. Yet the humans continued their assault, and eventually Gensoukyo had to muster up their own army, filled with people from every race and armed to the teeth with kappa issued weapons. The fairies and had also undergone a change in their physical attributes, thanks to Yukari?s ability. They grew taller, stronger, smarter, with Cirno being the most powerful.
Unfortunately, with the uniting of Gensoukyo came the full brunt of the war. The humans had realized that the ones that they were fighting against were, for the most part, immortal and had organized special teams of soldiers to capture the members of Gensoukyo?s fighting forces. They had first made off with a few fairies and lower tier youkai, but soon they were making off with higher level youkai like tengu, kappa, and even an oni or two. Even the most hard-hearted fighters were disgusted by the abhorrable things Gensoukyo?s spies had found them doing to their prisoners.
Everyone had suffered losses in the war. The Moriya Shrine had been destroyed, though its residents had escaped unscathed. The kappa had lost many of its members to the kidnapping groups. The tengu had fared no better, and the Forest of Magic had been completely looted, with only Alice Margatroid and Kirisame Marisa escaping. The residents of the Human Village and Eientei had abandoned their homes, preferring to scatter around Gensoukyo, providing service where it was needed. And of course the Scarlet Devil Mansion had gone absolutely mad when Flandre had been kidnapped a couple of days ago. Remilia Scarlet had actually flown into the Outside World and trashed some country called Russia, before Yukari dragged her back into Gensoukyo.
Cirno?s grimace disappeared as she heard footsteps. Voices reverberated down the hall as a small group of guards, just about to change shifts, headed down to the recreation room, where the soldiers had their breaks. Little did the guards know that an ice fairy had paid the recreation room a little visit, and that there was nothing left in the room but bloody corpses and scattered debris. Cirno tensed waited until the guards were right next to her pillar, before she jumped out and began firing. Icicles tore through the first man before he could even register that someone was shooting. The next guard was a little faster, and managed to get his hand near his gun before he too fell. One guard charged Cirno, but she ducked under his outstretched arm and stabbed her fingers into his neck. The rest of the guards stood no chance, as Cirno dodged all their bullets while picking them off with her Perfect Freezer. When the last man fell, Cirno reached down and snatched the keys away from his belt and attaching them to her own.
She flew down the hall, shooting at anyone who dared show their faces. The alarm began to sound as the men and women tending to the prison realized that an intruder had managed to bypass their defenses and was heading straight for the Youkai Containment Area, a mile long structure built specifically for containing youkai and their ilk behind bars. More and more soldiers poured out of Shinki-knew-where, but they were disposed of the same way the guards had been. Cirno reached the Youkai Containment Area without a scratch, but as she flew in, an explosion several yards away from her blew her straight off course. She slammed into a set of metal bars, flying through them and landing on the floor below,her vision blurring as she banged her head. She stood shakily, but slumped as her head suddenly throbbed rapidly, crimson splotches dancing in front of her eyes.Cirno gritted her teeth and steeled herself for more pain, before rising to her feet, her black uniform now stained with her blood. The Perfect-Freezer, which was still gripped in her hand, was thankfully unharmed.
A loud clapping sound echoed throughout the concrete pathway that Cirno had been flying through. She looked up and saw one of the more hated Outside figures within Gensoukyo: The leader of the Supernatural Capturing Militia. He was surrounded by what had to be the rest of the garrison; next to him was a gorilla-like woman wielding a grenade launcher. Cirno glared at her.
Oh, she is so going to pay..
?Well, well, well. So you are one of the lieutenants for Gensou-whatever.? Cirno?s glare changed to an inhumane grin that promised a slow, icy death. ?Yes, yes, you?re very angry and all that. So, here for your friends??
The man signaled suddenly. Two of his men dragged someone forward, gripping them under their arms. They roughly deposited the figure at their boss?s feet. Cirno?s eyes widened.
?Mysty!!!? Sudden screaming reached Cirno?s ears, as well as great creaks and booms. ?Flandre!!!?
Mystia, was, for all intents and purposes, completely ravaged. In all senses of the word. She was bloody, broken and naked. It didn?t take a genius (like Cirno) to understand what she had been through.
Flandre had been chained and chained and chained to a large, silver cylinder. The chains themselves where glowing strangely, and Cirno, being a genius, realized what they were. The cylinder was cracked, chipped, and dangerously close to being broken, for Flandre was making the best of her situation and was unleashing as much destructive power as she possibly could, wearing away at the pillar as she screamed in pain from the artificial, sunlight generating chains that strapped her to it. As soon as she caught sight of Cirno, her blood red eyes lit up and she began to struggle all the harder.
The man looked at the vampire with distaste. ?My, that wouldn?t do. We can?t you breaking that, you know. Titanium is very expensive, and it wouldn?t do for you to vaporize it, you know.? He snapped his fingers at the nearest soldier. ?You there, raise the power of the chains.? Flandre screamed as the artificial sunlight began burning her delicate skin.
?You MONSTERS!!!!!! YOU INCOMPETENT MONKEYS!!!! WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOOOOOOOOOOIIING!!!???? Cirno screamed, her face turning red from sheer anger and hatred. Her wings began to drip as white hot rage spread. Her body turned a bright, fiery red, but suddenly, her skin died down to her normal skin tone. The man, who had been grinning and panting as he beheld Flandre?s suffering, suddenly stopped and stared.
?Oh? Did the poor, poor fairy?s brain get overwhelmed by this?? the man jerked his head towards the still screaming Flandre. ?Is the poor, unintelligent fairy upset? Is the poor, poor fairy giving up??
Cirno lifted her hand and reached for the man. Just as she was about to turn him into a popsicle, she remembered something Captain Fujiwara had once told her.
..... Don't let the enemy get to your head alright? And never, ever lose your cool. If they mock you, if they taunt you, it's a trap. Without doubt, they'll be planning something. Humans are fickle, tricky creatures. Lose your cool, lose your freedom, or life, if you're mortal.
Cirno took a deep breath, and before long, her wings began to freeze again. Her skin became pale, and she exhaled, her heart as heavy as lead and her body loose and empty.
???. Won?t you let them go? You?re losing resources like this, and I?m going to break them out anyways. If you let them go without fighting back, you?ll be losing a lot of soldiers to me, you know.?
?No, no, no. That wouldn?t do at all. Not at all. They were bad girls you see? And bad girls have to be punished.? The man flicked his wrist at one of his goons, and the chains around Flandre grew brighter, and her screams grew louder.
??? You know, Flandre?s sister trashed ?Canada?. And Rumia ruined ?Los Angeles?. Don?t you feel bad that, by keeping and torturing Mysty and Flandre, you?ve indirectly killed so many people? Not including my little killing spree back there. Don?t you feel guilty at all??
?Not at all. Their deaths are for the greater good! ?.. Or at least, that?s how my superiors are trying to put it. I don?t really care about them. The fools were in the way, and they died as a consequence. Oh well. Too bad. But my life is here, managing you youkai and blah blah blah.? The man suddenly extended his hand towards Mystia and stroked her cheek. ?Really though?. It?s a shame how you youkai refused to cooperate with us humans. Now we?re reduced to capturing you and the like. Such a beautiful race you all are. Shame you refused our offers of peace; we would have gotten along famously."
?Famously? Yeah right. Your actions; in other words, the actions that started the war, already proved to us what we needed to know. Peace is impossible with you humans. The only thing that comes with you is suffering. You humans bowed to us, long, long ago. And you WILL bow to us, even if we have to eradicate your entire world to do so. Get your hands off Mystia, filthy trash!!?
?Oh?.? ?Hands off?, you say. I think it?s already too late for that. I?ve already had my hands on her, and in her as we??
He never finished that thought. For Cirno, who had healed, jumped and unleashed her frozen hell.
?Take this, human scum!!? Cirno shot the woman who had given her a taste of grenade, before spinning around to kick the stunned human man who had been caressing Mystia, catching him on his jaw. Cirno landed and shot at the chains binding Flandre, before whirling around in a circle, shooting and shooting and shooting. Humans fell, bone-chilling screams filled the air, and the bodies began to stack.
?Call reinforcements! Call for reinforcements!? The cry was taken up by all remaining soldiers.
?? Tch!! Flandre!? You okay?? Cirno yelled over the screams and shouts. She trod on the man who had been torturing the captives; his face was twisted in ecstasy. The man, Cirno decided, was definitely machosistic.
?? You..? The ice fairy from the lake?? Flandre managed to croak. The chains had weakened her more than ever, and the blonde had trouble standing. ?? Sis sent you..??
?Yeah! She was really worried! Come here!!? Cirno shouted. ?Bring Mysty as well!!?
?? Okay.. .? Flandre grabbed Mystia and stood from her slumped position in front of the pillar, which was now riddled with icicles and bullet holes. It looked ready to collapse. Flandre dragged Mystia and herself over to Cirno, mustering every ounce of her strength and occasionally attacking the soldiers surrounding them.
?Hang on you two, I?m getting you back!!? Cirno continued to shoot, until her Perfect-Freezer suddenly exploded in her hands. ?The hell!??
Mystia suddenly groaned and lifted her head. ?? Cirno?? Did they force drugs on me again?? Her voice, once so beautiful and melodic, was hoarse and scratchy.
Cirno grimaced and shook her head violently, her hands shaking in pain. The shards from her now-discarded gun had stuck themselves into her hands, and they were bleeding profusely from both the shards and from the force of the explosion.
Cries of, ?Her gun?s gone!!? and ?Let?s get her!? rang throughout the area from the seemingly endless amounts of soldiers. They began to advance as the thing that was harming them so lost its major advantage. They paid no attention to Flandre and Mystia, for they were too weak to escape and as such, could be captured again later.
Cirno?s shoulders began to shake in fury. She began to draw on her magical power, focusing it as best she could. She directed the power towards the center of the large room, where most of the soldiers where, and let loose.
A small disk of ice appeared within the mass of rabid soldiers, rotating somewhere near the speed of sound, growing bigger and bigger as it twirled, drawing murmurs of fear and suspicion as the soldiers beheld the relatively stationary, spinning Frisbee that had materialized near them.
The disk suddenly grew icy vines, complete with thorns, lashing out in all directions as it continued to rotate at high speeds. Anyone who even brushed against the tentacles was immediately reduced to giant blocks of ice, their faces frozen in the grotesque expressions they had on as they perished.
?C-Cirno??? mumbled Mystia. Her face, scratched, scarred, and dirty, had managed to put on an incredulous expression as she beheld her newly-powered up friend.
?Don?t worry. I?ll get you two out of here, no matter what.? Cirno said coolly as she watched her Ice Flower claim their victims. ?I promised everyone, and something like that has to be seen through. I?m not going to let them get away with what they did.?
The whirling Frisbee had become a variable hurricane, but it was starting to slow. Cirno frowned. It was supposed to last longer than that.
Guess my injuries were worse than I thought.... Shit.....
The humans stopped cowering once they realized that Cirno?s attack had ceased, and they began to advance. Cirno drew back and grabbed Flandre, who was carrying Mystia, before climbing onto the vines of her now-stationary Ice Flower. She dropped Flandre once she reached the highest point she could access, and created a crude ice sword, pointing it at the incoming wave of humans.
?Alright then, bring it on!! I?ll take on anyone!!!? Cirno began swinging as the first soldier reached her standing point. The soldier fell, as well as the next, and the next, and the next. Soon, a tall pile of bloody and mangled soldiers had piled up at the ice fairy?s feet. Behind her, Flandre and Mystia, who had finally regained her senses, were picking up the corpses and stacking them atop of each other. The trio began climbing, stacking, and w , heading higher and higher on the mountain of ice, gore, and bodies. Occasionally, Flandre or Mystia would pick up one of the loose corpses and weaponize them, swinging or throwing it to knock back the enemy. Before long, Flandre began to slash at their adversaries with her claws, while Mystia swung the corpse of her torturer; the man that Cirno had riddled with icicles, knocking back anyone within a three-meter diameter of her.
Despite the fact that the trio was fighting back as best they could, for every soldier they defeated, another one took the place of the one before. The vampire, bird, and fairy were fighting a losing battle, and they wouldn?t be able to hold out much longer. Cirno backed up and bumped into Flandre, pressing some things into her hand and mumbling to Mystia as she swung her sword. Suddenly she pushed them both off the mountain of bodies and the girls toppled off the pile of carcasses. Mystia rolled down the side, over hot blood, cold bodies, and pointy metal weapons. Flandre had been protected by Mystia, and didn?t suffer as much, but even she was coated in blood and bits of flesh when they finally came to a stop.
?Come on Flandre! Don?t let go of that thing Cirno gave you and follow me!!!? Mystia grabbed Flandre, who was sitting in a confused pile, and dashed towards the cells of their fellow fighters, where the youkai, fairies, humans, and etc?s had been roused as the fighting began. Now they were screaming encouragement, curses, and pleas for help. Mystia grabbed the keys that Cirno had forced onto Flandre, and began unlocking the restraints and releasing the captives. The former-prisoners began to head towards the fight, but Mystia suddenly let out a shout.
?STOP!!? The supernatural phenomena stopped and turned to Mystia, who had held out a hand. ?Don?t!! On orders from the lieutenant! Please come with me!! We?re going back to Gensoukyo!!? A cheer followed her words, and the Gensoukyans followed her as she went back to releasing the captives.
In the meanwhile, Cirno was badly injured, and her fairy immortality hadn?t kicked in yet. She was just as bloody and battered as the corpses she was standing on, and it didn?t look like she?d heal anytime soon.
??. Damn?. I hope Mystia, Flan, and everyone else is okaAAAAUGGGHHH!!!!? her almost-prayer was cut off as a bullet entered her chest, followed by more and more until Cirno toppled off the mountain. Cheers rose from the humans as their reinforcements marched in.
Cirno groaned as she tried to sit up. Her lungs had filled with blood, as well as being punctured. She wouldn?t last much longer. Soon her fairy regeneration would kick in, and she would be out for at least an hour, which meant that Flandre, Mystia, and whoever they had managed to release would be captured again. She couldn?t let that happen. She couldn?t!!
Cirno rose to her knees. She began coughing and vomiting blood, but stood shakily. The lieutenant could hear the sounds of celebrating masses all around her, from both humans and Gensoukyans. She smiled as the cheers from the humans suddenly became murmurs of fear and shock, before they became outright screams. Cirno reached into her hidden pocket. She wouldn?t get out of here. She knew that now. So she only had one choice.
Alright, useless, polluting, raping scum. Let?s die together. Forever.
Mystia looked around her. She and Flandre had released every youkai, fairy, human, and etc. in the containment center. Cheering had begun in the room that Flandre and Mystia had left Cirno in. She knew what had happened, and the songbird?s heart sank and shattered. She knew she wouldn?t be seeing the boisterous leader of Team 9 ever again.
Mystia fingered the last item Cirno had given Flandre, before activating it. A gap opened near her feet, and the released captives let out a roar of approval and began climbing in, one after another. Flandre tugged at Mystia?s arm.
?Mysty? Where?s Cirno?? Flandre asked, scarlet eyes wide and innocent.
Mystia?s eyes filled with tears and her already aching chest seemed to rip itself apart from the inside. Flandre didn?t know, she didn?t know the fate that Cirno had resigned herself to.
??. I?ll tell you when you get back. Go inside the gap, okay? Your sister and everyone else is waiting for you in Gensoukyo.? Flandre obediently climbed inside. Mystia turned and watched the rest of the Gensoukyans climb inside the gap, tears blurring her vision. She listened for any signs of Cirno all the while. Needless to say, she heard nothing but gunshots. When the last Gensoukyan climbed in, Mystia turned towards the gap and put one of her feet in. She turned back to the room she had left her friend in.
"Goodbye Cirno. Your legend will live on forever, I swear it!!"
The sparrow sorrowfully put her other foot in and fell into the gap just as an earsplitting explosion rocked the building, eradicating or freezing everything and everyone inside it.
Mystia was propelled farther into the gap at high speed as the shockwaves from the explosion forced her into Gensoukyo.
?What the!?!? Yukari stood and stared at the near naked, very bloody, and barely recognizable Mystia Lorelei in front of her. ?Another one!! Damn, Cirno really did her job!!?
?Ugh?.? The bird rose to her feet, covering anything that had to be covered. ?General?.?
The freed youkai, fairies, humans, and etc?s murmured in confusion. They were happy that they had been freed, but something was wrong?.
?Cirno?.. She? She?. Her final stand?? whispered Mystia.
?? What???
?She? She?s not coming back?. She forced us to leave???
The room exploded with activity. Flandre stared at Mystia, her eyes wide. Tears began to fill them as she realized the meaning of Mystia?s statement.
"Explain this Mystia!!" Yukari yelled. And the sparrow complied. The words poured out of her mouth, and tears began to fall. Rumia, who had arrived just in time to catch Mystia's explaination, walked up and comforted the sparrow. Wriggle, now one of the army's greatest spies, also came over and patted her back. Daiyousei had long since perished, in a similar manner to Cirno, and thus could not join in.
Yukari listened, enraptured. She couldn't believe that the little pest by the lake had grown so much. "... I guess she used a bomb. I don't think she's alive anymore.... That sort of bomb won't let Cirno regenerate...."
?Her? Her final words? Her final words were?.? Mystia's hand shook as she produced a small slip of paper.
?Yes?? Yukari leaned towards Mystia, her violet eyes wide; from guilt or shock, no one could tell.
The songbird handed over the note, which Yukari read aloud.
Eye'm the strongest!! And there will never be buses in Gensoukyo!
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7 pages. First long story I ever wrote. (Well, the only one I ever liked.) Please tell me what you think, and any suggestions for my next short, Mahou Sensei Mima.
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That last line means so much. So much more than I can think it to be. For a short story, I think it's a great first one.
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Thanks so much!! So... Anyone have a suggestion for Mahou Sensei Mima? Marisa is Asuna, I have decided!! (No romace between the two, no way.)
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Ah, that was definitely one of your better ones. You didn't focus on making it funny, so you fleshed out the rest of it much better.
Oh yeah, it seems I'm the person in charge of cataloging your collection in the fanfiction list. Because of that, I guess I feel obligated to give you some constructive criticism. Take the following passage into consideration:
?You MONSTERS!!!!!! YOU INCOMPETENT MONKEYS!!!! WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOOOOOOOOOOIIING!!!???? Cirno screamed, her face turning red from sheer anger and hatred. Her wings began to drip as white hot rage spread. Her body turned a bright, fiery red, but suddenly, her skin died down to her normal skin tone. The man, who had been grinning and panting as he beheld Flandre?s suffering, suddenly stopped and stared.
?Oh? Did the poor, poor fairy?s brain get overwhelmed by this?? the man jerked his head towards the still screaming Flandre. ?Is the poor, unintelligent fairy upset? Is the poor, poor fairy giving up??
???. Won?t you let them go? You?re losing resources like this, and I?m going to break them out anyways. If you let them go without fighting back, you?ll be losing a lot of soldiers to me, you know.?
?No, no, no. That wouldn?t do at all. Not at all. They were bad girls you see? And bad girls have to be punished.? The man flicked his wrist at one of his goons, and the chains around Flandre grew brighter, and her screams grew louder.
??? You know, Flandre?s sister trashed ?Canada?. And Rumia ruined ?Los Angeles?. Don?t you feel bad that, by keeping and torturing Mysty and Flandre, you?ve indirectly killed so many people? Not including my little killing spree back there. Don?t you feel guilty at all??
Don't you find it a bit odd how Cirno goes from being red with rage, so much so that her wings melt, to calmly trying to negotiate a non-violent solution? Remember, rage doesn't just go away. Emotions last for a long time, and if Cirno were that angry, she'd probably just go right into freezing ass and taking names.
Also, maybe this is just me, but that guy seemed much more like he'd be a sadist than a masochist.
Oh, and about Mahou Sensei Mima, I'd say just use your own decisions. One of the most important things in writing is to make the story your own; if it's full of suggestions from other people, you may have a harder time writing it.
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Thank you, for your advice. Thank you for cataloging my fanfiction. Thanks! Alright, though I might still ask for suggestions. I will add extra lines in the 'Chiruno is pissed, Eye will freeze you RAWR' part, involving Mokou. .... I should fix up the ending as well, now that I think about it.... Yes.... I'll start on Mahou Sensei Mima.... How about a romantic comedy through the eyes of a cynical ghost, guys?
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Dimension 15: Reimu's Tea Shop!
The bell jangled as the door opened. Reimu looked up in shock. Not many people visited her tea shop, despite the high quality of its products. The sales were so bad, that eventually, Reimu had to buy the tea and snacks herself to stay out of the red. No one had entered the shop in a month. In fact, Reimu had been dangerously close to shutting down and selling her store to Morichika, a large company specializing in electronics, and moving back to her shrine near the mountains.
'C-Can I help you!?" Reimu mentally cursed her stutter. Now the customer would think her inexperienced.....
"Ah, yes, I'm looking for this type of green tea," the customer, a tall school girl with waist length green hair, walked over to Reimu's desk and handed her a note, "I can't seem to find it anywhere else..."
Reimu raised her brows. This tea was unique only to her store. It was no surprise that the girl couldn't find it elsewhere. Reimu felt her confidence as a shopkeeper swell, and she spoke. "No surprise. This tea is only sold in my store....... I can't help but wonder how you know of this tea."
"Oh, my guardians drink this sort of tea, but they recently ran out. Actually, I think they ran out a long time ago, but I don't think they noticed back then."
"... I see. Well, the tea you're looking for is back here," Reimu waved her hand at the girl. "I have the leaves and the powdered version. Which one? The powder is a little more expensive, but it has a rich, creamy taste if you buy that one. The leaves have more kick, and it's perfect for starting the day with."
"Oh...." the girl followed Reimu, who had strolled purposefully over to the back room where she kept her tea, expertly weaving past tubs and barrels full of leaves, powders, or bags. "So.... You look about my age.... Do you go to school?"
"Can't afford it. Homeschooled. So, will it be leaves or powder?" Reimu reached into her red and white apron and produced a clear plastic bag and a metal scooper. She then noticed the expression on the girl's face. "Hey, hey. Don't feel sorry for me. I don't need school. Now, leaves or powder?"
"Uh... Some of both, I guess." the girl blinked and scratched her neck. "..... So uh.... Do you sell anything other than tea?"
"Mocchi, rice crackers, and other tea snacks."
".... Nothing else...?"
"Tea accessories, tea brewing items, and anything related to tea." Reimu deadpanned as she scooped up some tea leaves and dumped them in the bag.
"Ah.... So that's all?"
"Yep. Nothing special. Here's your stuff. Two thousand yen total. One half bag of leaves and half bag of powder." Reimu watched as the girl payed, took her tea bags, and turned towards the door. Reimu put her scooper away and wiped the green tea dust on her apron. The bell tinkled and the girl was gone.
".... Yep, that girl is definitely coming back here tomorrow, no doubt." the lazy shopkeeper sighed and sat back down at the counter. 'Let's see.... She seems like the person to enjoy mocchi, so I'll just raise the price on this red bean mocchi and lower the price of this fruity one...."
Reimu's eyes suddenly took on a strange gleam as she reached behind her to grab a packet of chewy goodness from the cubbies behind her. "....... A customer is approximately ten yards away. Fortune must be smiling on me today...."
The bell rang once again as the doors opened. A silver-haired maid and a blue haired child walked in. "My! Sakuya, this place smells so musty!"
"It's the tea dust, Milady. If you take a deeper whiff, you can smell the individual teas." the maid, Sakuya, replied.
"Can I help you....?"
"Ah yes, we're looking for some sort of red tea." the girl replied, sniffing daintily.
"..... Red teas...... I see. I have some right here. Wait there, I'll get it."
Reimu slid off her seat and grabbed the chair she had just been occupying. She dragged it over to the left side of the room and stood on it, reaching for the highest cabinet and pulling out a wrapped box. "Okay. Red tea is a bit expensive here, but only because it's grown in Africa."
The child snorted arrogantly. "For your sake, I hope the tea's worth the trip here. You might just be shut down if it isn't."
"Sure, shut me down if you can. I only import the best of teas." Reimu handed the box to the maid. "Three thousand yen."
"Thank you very much. Come Milady, we must go shop for candy." Sakuya spoke in a cultured tone.
"Actually, I have some snacks that go great with that tea. I'll give you a ten percent discount if you buy now."
Both the maid and the master turned towards Reimu, who had replaced her chair and was now facing the cubbies full of snacks. "If you add milk and honey to the tea you just bought, it makes the snacks seem warm and freshly baked. Even better than candy. Little kids used to love this sort of sweet."
Sakuya and the child looked at each other. "... We'll take it."
"Three hundred yen please."
Sakuya paid, and took the box that Reimu had dug out. The box was decorated with little bats, and was filled with chews and cookies. The duo left the shop, with the maid smiling easily and the child with a pleased grin different from the cocky smirk she had entered with.
"..... Looks like I just scored me some regular customers. Good job Reimu. Good job." Reimu stretched and was about to sit down, when the bell tinkled again. The dark-haired girl looked up to see two blondes walk in. One blonde in particular had several packages in her arms, as well as one or two dolls.
"Heyas, this place is STOCKED! Look at all the teas!! Hey Alice, look there are lots of snacks here too!! Man, I want to try mixing all of these, da ze~!"
"Calm down Marisa. Keep your twitchy hands to yourself. Ah, Miss, are you the shopkeeper?" the more refined blond asked. At Reimu's nod, she spoke again. "I want to know if you have any Earl Grey and some snacks to go with it."
"Well yeah, this is a tea shop. I have what you want right here." Reimu walked over to one of the tubs that had been lined up in a row. "How much you want?"
"Enough for three weeks, da ze!" yelled Marisa from across the room, where she had been staring at a jar full of oolong tea powder.
"Yes, for once, Marisa is right."
"What are you talking about Alice! I'm always right!!" Marisa flung her arm around Alice's shoulders, causing one of her packages to drop.
Alice blushed and bent to pick up her dropped item, before straightening and yelling at her fellow blonde.
Reimu obediently scooped out a healthy serving of tea leaves as the girls had their lover's spat. "Alright, as for the snacks.... I'd give you something good for Earl Grey tea, but this might be better for girls like you." Reimu finished packaging the tea and handed it to Alice, who tucked it uder her arm, shifting several other packages as she did so. The red and white reached for a large cardboard box with a clear top that had been sitting on her desk. Inside lay two bird-shaped buns, decorated with frosting and fruit.
"Doves...? What did you mean by--?" Alice flushed suddenly. "Wait, no... We aren't like that...."
"You never know right? Even if you aren't like that, they taste great."
"Three thousand yen total. Come again."
The girls left, with Alice blushing madly and Marisa asking what was wrong. Reimu looked at the darkening sky, and began packing up to leave. When she was done, she flipped the sign from 'Open' to 'Closed', before leaving.
Mmm.... I wonder.... Will there be any coins in the donation box?
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Erm... was that supposed to continue?
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Originally, yes. Someone pressed reply while I was out. So I wrote a new story.
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Ah. Well, you could always try typing them up in a word processor instead.
Anyway, nice slice-of-life there. You made something usually mundane interesting.
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Gonna redo the Alice and Marisa thing, doesn't seem very..... Well...... You know.
Also gonna spice it up to be less.... I don't know.
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Changed the titles and made them what they really were; little events that happened across different dimensions.
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What I Used To Be.
Meiling wiped the sweat from her brow as she strolled into the SDM's recreational room. Sakuy was already there, dozing on the couch. Meiling took a seat across from her and studied Sakuya's sleeping face, before turning her attention to the large glass windows. Sunlight was streaming through them, and the youkai's eyes could make out the individual dust motes that floated near the windows. Then Meiling yawned and shifted her body into a more comfortable position on the chair, and promptly fell asleep. And as she slept, her subconscious dragged up and old, old memory.......
Meiling stood proudly in front of the gates, facing the horizon. Her hands were wrapped around the hilt of an unsheathed sword, its point stuck in the hard earth, and a tattered, dark blue cloak had been thrown over her shoulders. A dark blur approached from the distance, stretching from one end of the plains to the other. Marching feet and chanting voices rang, and for a moment, that was all Meiling heard. Then, with expertice that only a master could have, she lifted her sword into a ready position, and, after a pregnant pause, dashed towards the approaching army of humans. The humans began screaming as they saw China's strongest youkai heading straight towards them, hefting the legenandary mountain-cleaving sword. Meiling crashed into the front of the army and began slashing and hacking. Heads began to fly as the youkai struck with terrifying precision.
Suddenly, Meiling was blown back by a huge explosion. The red head growled, and called out to the soldiers, who had backed away the second Meiling had fallen. "Gunpowder!! Cowards!!! Fight like men! Do you all still call yourselves honoured sons!! Fight!! Fight to honor your ancestors!!"
Several soldiers reacted rather violently at Meiling's taunt. They surged forward, their weapons drawn and caution thrown to the winds. Meiling let herself fall into the 'guard' postition, and blocked several sword blows in quick sucession, before launching her counterattack. She reached out and grabbed the nearest person, and flung him into the rest of the group, knocking them back and causing a few of them to fall over their own weapons. Meiling then grinned, and felt power well up in her. The youkai then took her blade, directed the point towards herself, and stabbed. Just then, her power exploded outwards, killing quite a lot of humans and utterly transforming Meiling. When the light from the explosion finally died, Meiling had gained possession of a black, reptilian tail, with a red tuft of fur at the tip. Her arms were also black, as well as being covered in ridges. Her fingers and toes had turned into sharpened claws, and her face held traces of black scales. Horns sprouted from her ruby red hair, and she, the dragon youkai of the eastern mountains, stood in front of the now cowering army. Then Meiling smiled, and reached out for the nearest man once again. She spun suddenly, allowing her claws to rake across his face. She then lifted her leg, and kneed his neck. Meiling jumped suddenly, and let herself fall feet first onto the soldier beneath her. His head smashed into the rest of his body, and when Meiling got off, his body had been crushed in half. (Like a tomato!) The dragon grinned to herself, and cracked her knuckles.
"Alright, so who wants the honor of being able to do battle with the Rainbow Dragon? Surely, your ancestors would be able to forgive your earlier cowardice if you shrug away your fear and die standing bravely against me, no?"
Meiling's arm lashed out suddenly, her palm intercepting the sword that had been about to cleave through her head. She spun, and her right arm took a large chunk from the man's chest. That seemed to enrage the rest of the men, for they let out throaty battle cries and charged. Meiling laughed, and began her counterattacks. She smashed the skull of one man, slit one man from neck to groin, and crushed the chest of another. And so it repeated itself, Meiling killing and crashing through the ranks of the once-organized men. Blood flew everywhere, blood and gore. She jumped over the spear men, dodged the arrows flying her way, avoided the cannons, and smacked away the swordsmen. One lucky man had gotten close enough to swing his sword once, but Meiling dealt with him before he could swing again. However, the one attack had done its job; Meiling was now missing a horn. Not that it mattered; she could live without one, and so she continued her slaughter, ripping off one or two limbs, crushing the legs of an axe man, and in general causing havoc among the lines of soldiers. She would win, the elation building up inside her. She would win, and she could then live in peace inside her temple. No one would dare try to capture her then, and she could practice her martial arts in relative pea---
And then she fell.
Meiling opened her eyes. Sakuya was standing over her, looking relatively worried.
"You alright, Meiling? You were thrashing about and grinning..... What were you dreaming about?"
Meiling lowered her head and smiled slightly. The dream had brought back nostalgic memories; memories that Meiling didn't know she had. But before she dwelt on that, there was something more important.....
"Sakuya-san.... THANK YOU!!!" Meiling sat up and wrapped her arms around the maid's waist, dragging her down as Meiling fell off the couch.
"For what?!! Meiling, get off!! Please, control yourself!!"
The gate guard let her grin imprint itself into Sakuya's stomach.
So that's why I like guarding gates.... I've been doing it since forever, haven't I?
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If you're wondering what EX-Meiling looks like, go to Danbooru, first picture of the Extra Stage Girls pool. Warning; Danbooru. -_-
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~('-'~) (~'-')~
Any reviews, requests, or advice would make me a happy person~
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Short Shorts Are Good For The Soul!
Elly fell to her knees and clasped her hands in front of her face. After she had adopted the traditional prayer position, she looked up and spoke in a loving, tender tone of voice. "I..... I am so, so sorry. Please, give me a second chance!!"
There was no response, and Elly's voice became desperate. "I.... I know I've been neglecting you, but.... Well, things have been busy, and my work load had doubled..... but I NEED you. I was overwhelmed by all the duties I had received, and ignored you in your greatest time of need..... But... If you'll have me, all that would be over. I..... The Elly you knew back then is back, and she's here for you once again. So please....." Elly leaned forwards for an embrace, but a sudden, elegant voice stopped her.
"Elly, are you proposing to the broken weedwhacker? Please hurry and fix it, so that you can get to work on the new garden. I don't want to go to the Kappa Village."
Elly pouted, but scooped up the weedwhacker and appropriate repair tools. "Yes Master...."
Love Spells Are Not To Be Used Near The SDM.
Remilia sauntered into the main room of her mansion, only to be greeted by the strangest scene that she had ever walked in on, the sparkling male vampire aside. She froze, her jaw dropping as her eyes jumped from one absurd image to the next. Her cheeks nearly ripped themselves apart as she beheld her precious, pure, innocent, and somewhat naive younger sister, STRADDLING a nearly undressed Komeji Koishi in what appeared to be an attempt to deflower the satori.
Remilia, attempting to protect her mental image of her sister, turned away from the two younger sisters and focused on one of the other absurd scenes; where her head maid, the ever-so-elegant Izayoi Sakuya, and her gate guard, the foolish, lazy, yet at times mysteriously wise Hong Meiling, were embracing near the stairs. Remilia turned her eyes away, and looked for the next out-of-place image; watching her two employees made her chest hurt; and she watched as Koakuma seduced an oddly subdued Patchouli. At the foot of the stairs, Alice was also straddling Marisa, who's face and upper body could not be seen by Marisa. Remilia assumed that they were 'making out' as most humans called it.
"Wh-What's going on....?" The vampire ripped the mob cap off her head and began pulling at it.
"Fufufu...." Remilia jumped, before whirling around to find half of Yukari, her torso and everything above it hanging precariously out of a gap.
"Yakumo Yukari!! What is the meaning of this!!" the vampire cried as she gestured towards the romantic scenery.
"Why, so feisty today Remilia! If you continue to act like this, I just might have to take you home with me~!"
"Bah, what nonsense is that!? Everyone knows you're out to frisk Reimu! Now hurry and answer!"
Yukari pouted, but responded. "Well, I merely manipulated the borders of lust and desire, and fanned the flames of love~!"
Koakuma pulled away from her master just in time to hear Yukari's claim, and managed to gasp, "No, Mistress Remilia!! It was the spellcards!!" before diving back at Patchouli.
"Spellcards? What about them...?"
"Oh, fine..... To be blunt, the satori used one of her love based spell cards while Flandre used one of hers, and Marisa arrived just in time to fire her Master Spark. They all collided and caused this.... Admittedly perverted scene....."
"How can I restore them!? Before Patchouli gets deflowered!!!" Remilia gestured towards the librarian, who's pajama bottoms were dangerously close to being removed.
"That, I won't help you with~" And with that, the gap youkai withdrew into her gap, leaving a flustered mistress, a blushing maid, a gently-smiling gate guard, two innocent younger siblings, a succubus and her master, and a pair of loving magic-users.
"DAMN IT YUKARI!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Alice's Completely Normal Day.
Alice capped her pen and waited for the ink on her paper to dry. It was a letter to her mother, the ruler of Makai. Today's letter mostly contained information on how Marisa had been annoying her, as well as the latest breakthroughs on her research and experiments. After having made sure that there were no mistakes or anything that could be misunderstood, Alice put the letter into an envelope, and sealed it into a small canister, which dissipated into the air after the puppeteer had tossed it into the air.
"Mmm. No doubt it's already on its way to Mother. Ah! Oh, no! Did I leave the fire on!!?" And with that, Alice rushed inside to save her dolls, all memory of her letter disappearing.
XXXXXXXXX
Yumeko, the original ninja maid, dashed to her master's room, neatly dodging any obstacles. So, after sidestepping a drunk succubus, jumping over Sariel, and ducking under a cart full of books, Yumeko stood in front of her master's chambers with barely a bead of sweat upon her brow.
The maid knocked, and entered as soon as she heard Shinki's barely audible 'Yes!'.
"Master, mail from young Alice." Yumeko spoke as she bowed with her upper body parallel to the floor, never looking up. She withdrew a small canister from her apron pocket, and held it out. The maid did not break from her position even as she heard her master's excited gasp, and did not look up as she felt the canister gently snatched from her hand. Yumeko allowed one corner of her mouth to twitch upwards. Her master had always been a little excitable when it came to the young mistress.
"Master, I shall be taking my leave now, if that will be allowed." Shinki looked up and nodded, smiling all the while.
"Ah..... So the little black and white witch has been bothering Alice, has she?" Out of the corner of her eye, Shinki saw one of her curtains move. "What do you think?"
A figure floated out from behind the cloth. Shinki's smile grew a little, and she reached under the chair she was sitting on to pull out a small box, as well as a few charms and a piece of paper. Shinki began scribbling on the paper, as the figure fit itself into the box. When Shinki had finished and the box's lid had closed, the charms sealing it shut, the ruler of Makai slipped the paper into a spare canister, as well as attaching the box to it by a string.
"Yumeko, can you please pick up a package?" At Shinki's call, the door to the room was flung open with surprising grace, and the blonde maid stood in the doorway. "Ah, so quickly too! Thank you! Can you please deliver this to Alice?"
"Of course." Yumeko took the package and canister from her master, and marched out into the hallway, before dashing away.
XXXXXXXXX
Alice gingerly opened the door to see Marisa's cheerful, grinning face.
"Hey, da ze! Let me have some teaAAUGH!?" Marisa's carefree exclamation was broken as an unidentified object fell on her head.
"Oh? Looks like Mother sent a present.... I wonder what it is?" Alice reached for the object that had bounced off a groaning witch's head, and promptly saw the words, 'Read the letter first' written on the box. The puppeteer popped the open the top of the canister, and shook the letter out from within. Alice opened the envelope, and read the letter.
Dear Alice,
I'm glad to hear that your research is going well. I am also sorry that you are being bothered by such a pest, so I'm sending something to help you with that. Oh, and please, do come to visit me sometime! Feel free to bring some of your friends as well, should you wish to. Yumeko also sends her regards, and Yuki misses you. I eagerly await your next letter, and I hope you'll have a nice week.
Best Regards,
Shinki
PS: Sariel cut off a bit of its hair, for use in your work. You'll find it in a bundle inside the box.
Alice pocketed the letter and gently peeled off one of the charms, and, after deeming it safe, stripped the box of its only decorations.
The top of the box flew open, and a blue and white bamboo shoot popped out. Alice's eyes became blank, and her mouth dropped open in disbelief. Marisa stopped moaning about her head and her hat, and turned to stare. Then the bamboo shoot grew, and before long, a tall, green haired woman dragged herself off.
"Gwah.... That hurt..... Oh! Hey, I'm here already!"
"Y-You're wearing a bamboo shoot...."
"Mima-SAMA!?!"
"Oh, hey! Marisa, how've you been? And you're Shinki's kid!! Heyas, nice to see ya two again-- Eh...?"
Mima stopped talking as she realized that Alice had fainted, and Marisa had been reduced to a babbling mess.
"OhShitOhShitMima-sama'sGoingToBeInTenDesires(Lol)Mima-sama'sGoingToBeInTenDesires(Lol)GABBURRGGPPHH...." Mima's apprentice, once so sturdy, had been reduced to twitching and foaming as her long-lost master appeared before her.
"Oh, well. I'll wait for them to wake up. Geez Shinki, your kid sure is excitable.
I will update this short series of shorts, and some of my other shorts at random times, so keep checking. And yes, I know that Ten Desires is already out, and I'm also pretty sure that Mima isn't there. I suck, don't I?
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This is why you never let anyone inside the SDM. Ever. :getdown: :getdown: :getdown:
Oh yeah can I make a request? http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,6591.msg696258.html#msg696258 (tl;dr: Hatate as a mercenary)
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The SDM, oh how I wish I could live there one day...
Don't worry, Ojou-sama. It's not as bad as it looks, come here and let Onii-chan show you why...
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Consider it done Crow Cakes. :3 After I finish up my short shorts, I'll get to work. Ah, but do you have some sort of plot other than that one in mind, or shall I make it up?
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Go make it up! I don't really care how it's done, but at least there should be GUNS. hehehehehehee
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Crow Cake's Story: Hatate Gets Paid To Hate?!
Hatate gently rubbed away the many smudges and blemishes that adorned her precious rifle. The firearm had endured many, many missions with her; the least she could do was tend to it.
The mercenary lovingly wiped it once more, before carefully easing the gun back into its well tended case. She then withdrew another black case; this one containing handguns. Just as Hatate began running the cleaning cloth up and down the side of her gun, the locks on her door clicked, and the thick oak door opened.
A pretty blonde woman in a lab coat entered, followed by a small, doll-like girl in red, Japanese-style clothing. The duo were welcomed by the barrel of a gun, as well as a few clicks as the safety was removed. The older woman immediately paused, and after a brief hesitation, smiled indulgently and held up her hands in a gesture of surrender. The girl behind the woman had similarly raised her hands.
"...... Welcome ladies. What business brings you to my humble adobe?" Hatate's face hardened. "And what gives you the FUCKING right to pick the locks and enter without permission?! You could have been shot!!"
The woman took her time thinking. "Mmmm.... I don't believe it. A mercenary with a conscious. Quite a rarity......."
"Shut up and get to the point. What do you want, and why are you here? No smooth talk please. I've had enough of smooth, silver-tongued snakes for a life time."
"Yes.... News of Yasaka's assassination has reached mine ears, as well as other.... Scientists in hiding."
"Enough of your mindless chatter, less you prove to be a waste of time. State your business!"
"Miss Himekaidou, please. Do calm down. Perhaps some tea--"
BLAAM!!
The woman's eyes were wide with shock. The girl who had been behind her was now next to her, her arm extended, as if to catch the bullet, but Hatate, sniper extraordinaire, had not been aiming at either of them. The bullet had buried itself into the wall several meters behind the girls. The bullet hole was still smoking, and the girl in the red dress glared at Hatate, her hand clutching a knife, while the blonde had brought out what appeared to be a small bomb.
The mercenary, on the other hand, had withdrawn yet another handgun, an her gloved hands were steady as she pointed her dual weapons at the intruders.
"Drop all your weapons, or I'll kill you where you stand. If you try anything funny, I'll shoot."
"And if you shoot, I'll move, Miss Himekaidou." The woman tucked the bomb into her coat and nodded to the girl, who hid her weapon. "Please, we mean no harm. We are merely here with a.... Preposition, if you will."
"A preposition? Let me guess, you want me to kill someone." Hatate deadpanned. "Tell me your name, your occupation, as well as who they are and why you want them dead."
"You are so quick to judge...... But I suppose you are correct." The woman placed a hand over her heart. "I am a scientist..... Dr. Alice Margatroid. I hail from Bucuresti."
"Long way to go. From Romania to Japan, that is."
"Indeed. At any rate, I am attempting to create the perfect human-robot hybrid. It has been my dream for a while now."
"Get on with it."
"Very well. In any case, certain people, powerful people, have threatened to... Er.... Expose my.... unethical deeds...."
"....... Let me guess, a few sacrifices for the greater good? ..... Not another one....."
"That's not true." Hatate glanced at the girl, who had finally spoken. "Miss Margatroid doesn't want to do that! She wants to help the people live their lives peacefully, without hurting others!! I'm living proof of her kindness!!"
The mercenary sighed, and turned to Alice. "Who's the girl, and what does she have to do with all this?"
"My retainer, and one of my adopted children. She volunteered for the experiment after I saved her from a life of death and decay."
"A 'Pet the Puppy' moment, huh."
"I'm sorry.....? What's that supposed to mean, Miss Himekaidou?"
"Find out yourself." Hatate's glare could have melted steel. ".... Miss Margatroid. I ask again; you wish to become my client?"
"Ah.... Yes, I suppose. I mean, yes. I do...."
"Good. Now, I want you to understand one thing about me and my clients." The brown haired mercenary lowered her arms and placed her handguns back inside their case. She also tugged off her gloves and placed them on the table that she had been standing behind. "I value the trust between me and my client, probably more than I should. If you attempt to backstab or betray me, then leave."
"Why would I--!?"
"People with more influence and power than yourself have tried, in an attempt to gain something with my death. In their lust to gain, they ended up with nothing. Don't let yourself become the same way, alright? Now, if you're really sure, sign here." Hatate produced a contract, as well as a ballpoint pen.
Alice stepped forward, signed, and placed a piece of paper on Hatate's desk. The mercenary gave the scientist and her experiment a nod, and, after they had left Hatate's house, put her gun case away and glanced at the paper.
"What the!!! Well, I'll be a skirt-flipping tengu with a cell-phone!! Just what sort of enemies have you made Margatroid!!?? Damn....." Hatate pressed the tips of her fingers to her forehead, and began rubbing away her headache. ".... It looks like this job will take longer than expected....." The mercenary got out of her seat and headed into the living room, where a large bird cage sat in the corner of the room. Inside the cage was a single crow, which Hatate pulled out. She reached into a basket inside of the cage, and withdrew a piece of paper and a small bit of lead. The mercenary scribbled down, 'Visiting you tomorrow; buisiness trip. Love, Scallop.', and attached the note to the crow's leg. When she finished, she threw the bird out of the window, and watched as it became a distant speck against the clear blue of the sky.
XXXXX
Ugh, the personalities are all wrong...... I made Hatate look like some dandy old guy in a fancy suit, or possibly Reimu, and Alice just feels so.... REMILIA-ish..... The off-characterness....... IT BURNS!!! :fail:
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I am crying tears of joy. Why can't I write anything nice? Whyyyyyyyy?
Like I said, you don't need to follow the whole idea. Especially the Koishi idea
. I'm still slapping myself silly over it.
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Why can't I write anything nice? Whyyyyyyyy?
Oh but you already do, Crow. And I wish I had dreams like yours... the only Touhou-related dream I ever had (and remembered) one about me meeting Marisa at some party somewhere and she brings me to this portal thingy somewhere and I just woke up all so suddenly...
(getting off-topic)
Oo I'm looking forward to seeing how this one will turn out. Never thought of Hatate as a mercenary before. Never really thought of her as someone who can handle guns so well, either :V
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You write well Crow, no matter how you deny it. I never really saw Hatate as a mercenary either, but now that Crow dreamt it, I SEE IT. I've had a handful of Touhou dreams, but the most vivid one was where Yukari tried to host a murderous game show in an elevator, and she tried to kill me. Akwardly enough, the dream ended with an ice cream party with giant tea cups...... I wonder if I can milk a story out of that? Read the story again, I'm updating it.
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Ugh, I hate the way I wrote this story. Give me a few days ro rewrite and finish the story...
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Celebrating 800+ views by revising several shorts. Look out for it, yeah?
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Yuuka blast my stories with a Master Spark, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS!?! EVERY TIME I TRY TO TYPE 'Gilgamesh' IT COMES OUT AS GILGAMESH! Actually, any Gilgamesh comment turned into Gilgamesh. Excuse me while I stew.
Look fowards to a story where Shinki and Gilgamesh comment on the Incidents they missed. By the way, Gilgamesh is M-I-M-A.
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Afraid you've hit a word replacement the forum's got set up, so any mentions of m.i.m.a. will turn into that entirely unrelated name. *just tested it* Seems kinda annoying that the MotK people did it, though I have no idea why so it might be done for a reason? *shrug*
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Then it looks like M.I.M.A. and Shinki are going to have to retreat to the sidelines until M.I.M.A. gets back to normal. I don't want the great evil ghost to look like WALL.E. :X
And it looks like I made most of these comments on my story. How sad. On the other hand, I can finally start working on Crow Cake's story. It'll be out by the 31rst at the latest.
|＼／|
⑩⊂;(ﾟ∇ﾟ);⊃⑩
For now, please enjoy this Reimu?
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Well, on the 'lack of comments on your stories' front, I suppose I could offer some...
I have to say, your funny ones are actually QUITE clever. i got a kick out of them, anyway.
The one I think was the best was probably the one with the Gensou-Outsider War, though. That last line, like someone else had said...It was really well done, and it made me think for a bit. At first I'd thought of it as just a silly comment before Cirno detonated herself, but then after looking at it more, I understood, and it was actually quite a powerful line. (The rest of the story was well done, too, mind; I liked the detail you put into a lot of things. It's just that that last line was the real jewel of it.)
Also, that Reimu looks like she's cheerleading, haha. (I'll figure those are meant to be yinyang orbs, but still.)
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Alex And Maurice!
Alex stretched before scratching his head. The puppeteer got up and carefully cleaned his cluttered workplace, putting everything back in its proper place. It was almost twelve, and he knew that the damned mage would come popping in any minute--
"Yo~ Alex, you in there?" The puppeteer sighed. "Hey, open up you shut-in! Let me in, ze!"
"Go away, Maurice. I'm busy." Alex turned towards the front door, and jumped back in shock. Maurice's face was pressed against the window, and his golden eyes were staring right at Alex.
"Liar! Let me in, da ze! Or I'll tell Aya that you spend all day jacking off!"
Alex pressed his thumb over his wrist and waited for his pulse to slow, before responding. "Don't you dare, you stupid black and white rat."
"Then let me in!" The mage had begun tapping at the glass, and Alex feared for its safety.
"Alright, alright, just stop that tapping!" Alex walked up to the door as fast as he could, and unlocked the door. A few seconds later, the disheveled mage strolled in.
"Hohoho! Looks like the mighty Alex Margatroid fears for the safety of his glass windows! How cute! Just wait till I tell Redie about this, he'll laugh his head off!"
"I don't really think that the Hakurei priest shares your sense of humor, Maurice. Now, what do you want?" Alex crossed his arms and scowled.
"What I always want!! Tea, magic, and fun!"
"Weird, I was always under the impression that the priorities of men like you were 'Women, wine, and money' or something like that."
"Naw, Mana-sama told me to wait until my fifties before I indulged in women and cash." Maurice stepped back and eyed the puppeteer in front of him for a moment. "Though, I'd think that would be too hard for you to do, even when you are a dandy old codger! Man, you'd be a real lady-killer if you'd step outta the house every once in a while, ze!"
"I don't want to be told that by Gensoukyo's resident pimp." Alex clapped his hands, and almost immediately, a child-sized puppet tottered foward from the back of the room. "Shang, get some tea for the pimp, would you? In a dog bowl, if possible."
"Eh~ So Alex is in to this sort of thing? Well, alright, ze! Hey, Pinocchio! While you're at it, get some--" Maurice never got a chance to finish his statement. Alex had slapped a hand over his friend's face as soon as he possibly could.
"You... You.... Get out!! Get out of my house!!"
Maurice pried Alex's hand off his face, and grinned broadly. "Hey, no problem! We can do that some other time, ze! What I really came here for is to invite you to the vampire's party. Pat's been asking for you. Apparently, he found something within your fields of expertise or something. Heres the invitation, da ze." The mage handed Alex an envelope. "See ya there~"
Alex watched as Maurice stepped onto his staff and flew off. "Hrmph. Stupid....." The puppeteer flipped open the envelope and read the contents. "Hmm... So she wants to learn a little puppeteering magic to help control Lander? Geez, that family has to learn to control their kid. Well, I suppose he has gotten better with controlling his powers." He shut the door and locked it.
Hmm... Bath time? No, too early. And the party isn't until six, so I have time. Hmm..... I just cleaned up, so I can't start my research again.... Hm.. What to do?
As Alex pondered the question, a knock on the door broke him out of his reverie. "Oh, what is it now!?" Alex flung the door open, and to his immense surprise, saw the half-youkai storekeeper, Rinnosuka.
"Oh! Er... Mister Alex.... I... Um... Here!!" The half-youkai shoved an envelope in Alex's direction. "Please read it!!" The silver haired girl then took the the air and flew away as fast as she could.
"Well, that was interesting. Let's see...."
Dear Mister Alex,
I write this letter to profess my love for you. I admit that I had fallen for you when you first entered my shop with Maurice. And I really, really, like yo--
Alex tore the letter in half, and immediately called for Shang. "SHANG!! SHANG!!" The doll flew to its master's side immediately. "Burn this, burn this immediately!! No, no! The black and white couldn't have known of this, and he must not! No, no, no, no, no, no, no..."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Alice sat up, panting and sweating. The dolls on her dresser lifted their heads, and as Alice fell back on her bed, the dolls fell back to their original positions. The puppeteer brought her hand to her face and pressed the back of it to her forehead. Then she groaned and sat back up, flipping her hand over and pressing her palm to her forehead, ignoring the way the sweat make her bangs stick up.
Unfortunately for Alice, a flood of weird, genderbended images of her fellow Gensoukyo residents flew threw her head. First came Yukari, all decked out with his/her hair in a ponytail, as well as a goatee. Then came a shirtless Reimu, who also had a small ponytail as well as his/her trademark sleeves. Male Sanae seemed a little more femine, or at least more decent than male Reimu. After flew male Aya, pulling down trousers and taking pictures of undergarments. Alice winced at that. But before the puppeteer could get herself back on track, a stream of other male Gensoukyans invaded her mind.
By the time Alice got her mind under control, only one thought was present in her head.
Oh, gods, oh gods, OH GODS. My subconscious needs to get a life. I wonder if that satori is willing to help me out with that?
An image of a male EX-Keine and a male Eirin flashed through her mind. Alice shivered,
If not, then Yukari it is. Yes, Yukari can make the bad things go away.....
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Although it's interesting to see what the girls would look like male, it's not very fun when you get down to it. IT IS, I REPEAT NOT FUN. I mean just imagine Pimprisa, as a male, seducing other males. I have nothing against yaoi, in reality and otherwise, but that image is just BAD. Not to mention Aya. Also, what about Mokou and Wriggle? They wear pants in normal Gensoukyo. What happens in genderbend? Kilts? Really, it's not pretty.
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...Gensokyo's creepy with all boys.
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Isn't it? I didn't smile once while reading this. I guess that's why Alice was so weirded out. Having something as rare as a male in Gensoukyo, and actually being one must be horrifying, even if it was a dream. As a celebration on Facebook's Touhou Project reaching 30 thousand likes, I will get off my lazy butt and start working on the Hatate=Mercenary story.
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Rinnosuka sounds cute, though. But besides that, yeah it's pretty creepy, especially when you realize there'll be a creepy old geezer who likes playing with gaps, a crazy dude in white who sprays bullets at people when it's spring, a horribly obese yeti who comes out only in the winter, a mad doctor who tries out his crazy new drugs everyday on his pet shota bunnyman and a certain tengu who flies around taking pictures of men in their underwear... I'd name more but you get the idea. I'd like a trap Wriggle though, and maybe even a shota boy!Chen with the fatherly man!Ran
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Huh, the gender-swapped Gensoukyou sounds rather interesting, actually. Likely to be difficult to write for, but still, it seems like a lot of fun.
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Someone, Help Eirin!
Kaguya's intense stare almost drilled a hole into her flatscreen, where Fox was duking it out with Sonic in Final Destination. She had one life left, and Sonic was winning with two lives left.
"Come on.... Win for Mama Fox! Win for Mama! Or at least that fox shikigami, 'cuz I guess she's more your type. Come on, almost there, 398%!! Critical, critical, critical..!!!" Sonic fell off the platform. "Oh, HELL YEAH!!! Take THAT Sonic!!"
The fight soon ended, with Kaguya's victory. After that, Kaguya had shut off her Wii and got off her futon. It was nearly time for her daily scrap with Mokou-tan, and there was no way she'd miss that.
Kaguya left her room, and energetically greeted any rabbit she passed by in the hallways. "Hi Inaba! How are you, Inaba? Nice to see you again, Inaba! Oh, hey Inaba!"
"Princess? Are you going to see Mokou now?" Kaguya turned to see the Moon rabbit. For a second, Kaguya couldn't remember her name, but it soon came flying back to her.
"Oh! Udonge!! Yeah. Why? Does Eirin want something?"
"Well. She does want you to give something to Fujiwara-san's guardian. I have it right here." Reisen reached into her blazer pocket and withdrew a small package. There was a note taped to one side of the rectangular present, but Kaguya couldn't make out what it said.
Kaguya took the package and slipped it into her sleeve. Reisen bowed, before walking away, yelling at the Earth rabbits as she went. Kaguya shrugged and left, careful not to let the package slip from her sleeve.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
The first thing Kaguya saw when she stepped into the clearing were flames. The bamboo surrounding the clearing were on fire, creating an illusion of a flaming barrier, and Mokou stepped out from the dense clumps of burning bamboo.
"Heh. Late, Kaguya. What happened? Didja get caught up in one of your video games?" Mokou grinned smugly as she flew into the air.
"No, I got held up by official business. Eirin told me to give this to the hakutaku." Kaguya tilted her arm, and the present slipped out and fell into her hand. The Lunarian held it out to Mokou, who had dispelled the flames as soon as she had heard, 'hakutaku', landed and reached for the object.
Kaguya tossed it to her, and Mokou promptly threw it into the woods. "W-What was that for, Mokou?!"
"I'll find it later. Keine's not here right now, and I'm not leaving to go get her!! Put up your fists, NEET! It's time to get started!"
The firebird's war cry caused a wave of affection to rise up in Kaguya. To think that Mokou would rather fight with her than hang out with the hakutaku....
"Take this!! Possessed By Phoenix!!"
"Urrwwraaah!?!? T-Take this then! Night's End-Cresent Moon!!"
Unfortunately, Kaguya could not make it in time, and the brunt of the spell card hit her before her danmaku could even near Mokou. The fiery lasers tore into Kaguya's flesh, and the Lunarian could feel herself slipping away from consciousness.....
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Kaguya sat up, ignoring the dull pounding in her head. She was in someone's house, tucked into someone's bed. A pleasant, yet exotic scent wafted over from one of the rooms. The princess stood, made the bed, and promptly realized just whose house she was in. Kaguya jumped back onto the bed, pulling the blankets over herself.
"What's up with that racket!? Kaguya, is that you?!" Mokou stormed into the room, her bare feet slapping against the worn wood. Kaguya yelped as she felt the blanket being ripped off her.
"Wh-What are you doing, Mokou?!" Kaguya's face turned a brilliant shade of red as iron-like fingers closed around her forearm. Mokou pulled her out of bed, sending Kaguya stumbling as she let go. The princess regained her balance, and turned to face her hotheaded rival. "What was that for!?"
"Time to eat, and I'm definitely not feeding you. Come on, let's go eat Fujiwara Curry!!" Mokou headed for the room she had just left, and Kaguya followed after her.
It was a small room, with just enough space to cook and eat. There were no chairs, just a raised wooden board several inches off the floor. Set on this board were two plates, both of which where filled with rice, and covered by some sort of thick red sauce, as well as some meat and vegetables.
"..... What's that? Is that.... Fujiwara Curry?" Kaguya stared at the meal in fascination and disgust. As if on response, one plate of curry bubbled ominously.
"Yup! The product of years and years of experimentation! Be happy Kaguya!! I've only made this for people really close to me!! In fact, you're pretty undeserving of this, you know!?"
"Aw, but Mokou-tan. Remember the rocket incident? Weren't you the one who hid outside the window and eavesdropped on us? Aren't you the once who's always obsessing over me?" Kaguya turned to Mokou and leaned forward, their noses almost brushing. "Even if you don't want to admit it, you spend more time at my place than you do at your own house~"
"Fuck off, and eat, Moonbitch!!" Mokou backed away, and headed for the table/board with only the barest hint of a blush on her cheeks. Kaguya smiled and followed after her, mentally celebrating her victory. Mokou sat at the raised board and promptly began digging in.
"Er.... Is this really safe to eat...?" Kaguya, who had seated herself on the other side of the table, lifted her spoon but eyed the meal with apprehension.
"You're immortal, what do you have to fear? Eat!" The firebird downed another mouthful of curry, smearing some sauce and rice on her cheeks.
Kaguya hesitantly dug her spoon into the rice, and brought the utensil to her half-opened mouth. She stared at the spoonful of red goop and rice. It bubbled. She stared. It bubbled. This pattern continued with such intensity, that Mokou actually stopped eating to stare.
"What's wrong Kaguya? Scared?" Mokou smirked.
"..... This thing.... It's bubbling....."
"That's because it's hot. Eat Kaguya! I put a lot of effort into this! I made it using the highest grade ingredients available!"
"The bubbles.... They look like pimples.... The pimples..... They're staring at me......"
"Kaaaaaaguuuuuyaaaa......." The Lunarian looked up, her face blank and her eyes dull. She felt her arm being moved, and Kaguya soon found the spoon and its contents in her mouth. She swallowed on reflex, and as she did, she felt the remains of her stupor fade away.
"Mokou? Why are you holding my arm?"
"Damn.... I knew playing too many video games made you stupid, but I didn't know it was this bad. I fed you. With your own spoon too. Geez, what a useless Lunatic Princess."
Kaguya said nothing.
Huh... It doesn't taste that bad? Weird. Knowing Mokou, I had thought there would have been charcoal in iTEERRRRUUUUN!!!!!!??
The princess felt her throat tightening, and her nose started to burn, bringing tears to her eyes. Almost as if on cue, her mouth seemed to catch on fire, as if someone had pressed a burning coal onto her tongue and made her swallow it. She could feel the insides of her cheeks tightening, as if they were being slow roasted over a fire. Kaguya opened her mouth and began screaming.
Mokou jumped away from the wailing Lunarian in shock. "What's wrong Kaguya?!"
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!!?? WAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHH!!!!" By now, the pain had intensified, and now Kaguya felt as though lit matches had been stuck up her nose, and her mouth was suffering abuse parallel that one time Mokou had shoved her flaming hand into Kaguya's mouth.
"Huh? Oh!! Oh, wait here!!" Mokou stood and moved to the puny cooking area, and reached into a bamboo crate. Mokou came back with a handful of ice. "Here, suck on these! Don't chew, don't swallow, and don't let them sit on your tongue!!" Mokou promptly dropped the ice into Kaguya's open mouth.
Kaguya obeyed, and once the ice had melted, the only indication of her previous pain were her incredibly raw mouth, throat, and nose. The princess attempted to speak, but the only a hoarse croak made its way out.
Mokou left the table yet again, and returned with water, smirking all the while. Kaguya glared at her through still teary eyes, and downed the glass that the firebird had given her. When she finished, she slammed the glass onto the board.
"You.... You bitch..... The fuck.... You..... You.... You call that bit of hell fire cooking!?"
Mokou frowned. "Unless you can do better, Moonbitch. I spent centuries getting that dish right! In fact, let's see you try it!"
"Try.... What.....?" Kaguya panted.
"Make a dish better than mine, and prove that you can cook better than this heartfelt meal!!"
"It's on bitch..... Tommorrow night, at Eientei! Cooking contest! I bring one judge, you bring one judge, and then each of us will post two posters in random areas to get two more judges! No bribing! Deal?"
"Deal! Now, get out of my house!!" Mokou reached over, wrapped one arm around her rivals shoulders, and put her free arm under Kaguya's knees and quickly lifted her. Kaguya promptly blanked out, and didn't notice herself being carried through the Bamboo Forest and dropped off at Eientei.
"Alright Kaguya! I'll see you tomorrow, so get ready!!" Mokou whirled around and disappeared into the forest, leaving an unconscious Kaguya and several curious rabbits.
"Princess? What are you doing, just lying there?" Eirin's face was the first thing Kaguya saw when she came to. "And did you deliver the package to Miss Kamishirasawa? Actually, never mind. I saw Mokou carrying it. So, I take it you lost the fight?"
"Urrrgghhh.... Too spicy...."
"....... Princess.....?" Eirin finally sighed a snapped her fingers at the nearby rabbits. "Take the princess to her room. If she needs me, tell her I'll be in my lab." And with that, Eirin left, leaving the rabbits to drag Kaguya back to her chambers.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
"EIRIN, EIRIN, HELP ME EIRIN!!!!!!" Kaguya screamed. It was about half an hour after Mokou had brought her home, and now Kaguya was getting hungry, and of course, she needed to tell Eirin about the contest. The door slid open, and in walked the doctor.
"Princess....?" Eirin crossed her arms and stared at the still screaming princess. "Princess, what's wrong?"
"I'm hungry!"
"......... That's certainly strange. Usually Mokou feeds you before bringing you back, if she's the one who wins."
"Well, this time she fed me something truly terrible. So, this happened." Kaguya gave a surprisingly accurate description of what had transpired, leaving Eirin bewildered.
"So... She basically fed you extremely spicy curry? And now we're hosting a contest to see who cooks better? And you want me to be a judge?"
"Yep! You and one volunteer for my part, and Mokou brings one person and a volunteer as well!"
"......... Very well. As you wish, your Highness."
"Thanks Eirin! I'm going to go get a volunteer! From the Human Village, maybe?" Kaguya flounced out of the room, midnight black hair flowing down her back.
For the next few seconds, Eirin wondered if there would be enough time to make another Hourai Elixer. If the Princess and Mokou were cooking, then Eirin would need all the immortality she could get. Sighing, the doctor chided herself for having such irrisponsible thoughts, but felt the smallest pangs of regret as her genius mind predicted the next day's blood bath.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Kaguya glanced at Mokou from the corner of her eye. The firebird was carefully examining her equipment, attempting to find proof of sabatoge. Several meters behind them sat the four judges; Eirin, Keine, Reimu, and Yuyuko. Eirin looked apprehensive, while Keine was trying, and failing, to appear assured. Reimu looked hungry, while the ghost was chatting affably. Nearby, the commentator, Udonge, was watching nervously as Mokou checked the ingredients. Once Mokou gave a nod of assention, Udonge stepped towards the microphone and began to adress the crowd of rabbits, humans, and youkai.
"Uh..... Um.... Hello..... Everybody..... Welcome t-to the first Eientei Cookoff..... Umm...."
"Get on with it rabbit, I'm hungry."
"Eep!! Uh..... Of course...... Contestants..... Please start!" Reisen spoke with conviction. Kaguya guessed that the rabbit was the type who had no idea how to fill in the blank spots in conversation, or simply wasting time chatting with strangers.
Next to her, Mokou had begun cracking eggs and beating them. Not wanting to fall behind, Kaguya began boiling water. Behind them, the judges watched with approval as the rivals began to prepare their dishes: Mokou's Fujiwara Curry and Kaguya's Eternal Udon.
Mokou had begun peeling her potatoes, and Kaguya was washing her beef. When she had completed her task, Mokou chopped her peeled carrots. Kaguya washed her vegetables. Mokou boiled her peeled potatoes. Kaguya washed her hands.
The firebird stared at her. "What's up with all this washing?! Do something productive!" Kaguya stuck out her tongue, and began greasing her pan.
Kaguya could see Reimu shift impatiently in her seat, while the pink ghost to her right had begun to drool. Eirin had gone paler than usual, and the hakutaku was starting to look regretful. She quickly dumped a bag of noodles into the boiled water, and waited patiently for them to cook.
"Alright!! Time to start!" Kaguya turned to see Mokou surrounded by an array of prepared ingredients. The firebird was standing imperiously in front of the table, which was groaning in protest to the weight it carried. One of the pots contained a thick, bubbling red sludge that was unmistakably Fujiwara Curry. Or at least the base, as the ingredients had yet to be added.
"Gh!! You're almost done already!? No fair!"
"Suck it up, Moonbitch! Your own fault for spending so much time washing!"
"Bah! Hey, Eirin! Isn't she going to be penalized for profanity? Eirin? Eir-- HOLY HELL!!" Kaguya's eyes fell upon the prone form of her faithful servant. "Eirin!? Eirin!?"
Mokou's ruby eyes widened as Eirin fell from her seat and landed facedown onto the ground. Keine quickly stood and moved to help her. "Doc?! Doc!? What the fuck are the rest of you doing!? Help Keine help the Doc!"
Reimu sighed, and went to Eirin's side, flipping the doctor over and lazily checking her pulse. "So troublesome....."
Yuyuko stared at Eirin in confusion. "My my..... What happened to the doctor? Youmu, what happened to her?" There was naturally no response, as the gardener had left after dropping her mistress off. "Youmu? Where'd you go, Youmu? Helloooo?"
Reisen ran to her master with a spray can in her hand. "Master! Hold on, I've got some sprayable revival salt!" The rabbit vigourously sprayed all over her master's face, never missing a spot.
Eirin revived in a manner that made Mokou's fiery ressurections seem almost normal. The silver-haired doctor ran laps around the table, every-so-often allowing her brisk jog to melt into a sprint and from there, turned cartwheels and backflips all the way around the group.
"Why the hell is she doing that?" asked Reimu, eyebrow twitching in irritation.
"I-I think maybe it's because I was a little too vigourous with my spraying....."
"When will she be back to normal, Udonge?" Mokou scratched her head as Eirin began doing barrel rolls and firing an imaginary automatic machine-gun.
"Cchhk-Chhcckk-Chhrrrook-BOOM!!!" Eiring threw herself back and held her arms above her head as an fantasy explosion blew up in her face.
"....... Where the hell is Aya when you need her? Is she trolling us again?" Reimu checked the sky for skirt-flipping tengus, and was disappointed when there were none in sight. Kaguya glared at her.
"Help me pin her down!! Gah, what does Eirin think she's doing!?!? Does she think she's Snake or something!?!" Kaguya rushed towards her servant, who was now chucking "grenades" at the judging tables.
"SNAKES?!?! Kanako again!? Dammit, I told her I'm not interested in marrying Sanae already!!!" Reimu cowered slightly, holding her arms up to ward off any falling pillars and indigo haired godesses.
"Wait, is she against you marrying the priestess or for it?" Keine asked.
"Against it!! I don't even like Sanae that way!!" Reimu, no longer intrested in relaying the details of her lovelife, turned and began chasing Eirin theough the clearing.
"Wahaha!! Death shall never break me, Brothers!! I swear on the Brigade that I shall uphold our laws!! Pew pew pew!!" Another deranged cry from the deluded doctor rang through the air.
Mokou jumped into the air and dove at Eirin. "Stop Doc, before the reporter and the paparazzi catch you!!"
Yuyuko stared blankly, before covering her mouth and chuckling. "Oh dear.... Looks like I'll have something to talk about during the next Old Maids meeting......"
"Shut up and help already!!" Kaguya wrapped her arms around Eirin's busty chest, but was promptly flattened as the doctor decided to do a barrel roll to avoid an imaginary gunman. "Holy hell, her breasts are heavy!!"
"Yes, breasts to tend to make up most of the body weight on busty women." Yuyuko waved her hand vaguely as the other girls; minus Eirin, stared.
"Look, we can talk breasts later; catch that doctor!!" Mokou yelled from where she was gripping Eirin's leg. Eirin kicked at Mokou's head and ran across the clearing.
Reimu sighed and tapped her head, appearing to be at least twenty years older than she really was. "Let's hurry this up....." Rather than pulling out a spell card, the dark haired maiden merely strolled over to the cooking area and grabbed a single plate.
After examining it, Hakurei Reimu's right hand; the hand that held the edge of the plate, went to her left hip before Reimu whipped her arm forward and let the plate fly out of her hand. And the plate flew through the air, spiraling towards Eirin.....
It hit. The plate smashed into the side of Eirin's head, shards and blood flying everywhere. Eirin fell to her knees and collapsed onto the floor, a small pool of blood forming around her head. Reisen quickly ran up to her master, pulling a first aid kit from within her blazer.
"Hold on Master!" Reisen grabbed a roll of bandages and bound them around Eirin's head. "The bleeding's slowing!"
While the rabbit tended to her master, Reimu watched wearily as Mokou pushed herself up and Kaguya sat up from where she lay. The lower half of Yuyuko's face was hidden by her fan, but it was obvious she was smiling. Keine had run over to Eirin, and was assisting Reisen in her medical endeavor.
"You people are so troublesome." Reimu floated over to the judge's table, and landed next to Yuyuko. Mokou glared, before turning her attention to the simmering curry.
"Shit! I gotta prepare the yakitori!" Mokou rushed over to the cooking area, arms outstretched comedically.
"..... Oh crap! My udon!" Kaguya ran after her rival, waving her sleeves flapping. Reimu watched them go with what had to be the most apathetic expression to ever grace Gensoukyo.
"They come and go like thunderstorms I swear." Yuyuko snapped her fan shut and tapped the tip against her forehead, but before the ghost could speak, Reimu interrupted her. "Shut up."
The princess pouted, but her usual airy manner was still intact. "Oh my. I wonder when the food will be ready."
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Gratz, man...
(http://i45.servimg.com/u/f45/16/35/02/77/99910.jpg)
By the time you see this, it'd be 1k...
(I'm looking forward to seeing how the Kaguya short ends and how Hatate-mercenary short goes :V)
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VICTORY!!!! I WILL NOW WORK ON THE KAGUYA SHORT WITH ALL MY HEART!!! Ah, on a side note. Anyone who reads my shorts should continuously reread some of the stories because I rewrite or add to the stories randomly.
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Hata-tan Gets Paid to Hate?
The mercenary had a gun in her purse. That much Alice was sure of. The mercenary in question, Himekaidou Hatate, sat across from the blonde scientist, smiling affably and loosely gripping her purse.
"So..... Miss Margatroid, was it? What can I do for you? Because, if it's a bit of space on my paper, I can totally do that!" Hatate grinned, just the slightest hint of a youngster's cockiness flashing across her pretty face.
"Um.... No.... That's not quite it...." When Alice had requested the services of The Kakashi Spirit, she had not expected the young, attractive young woman she was now dining with. Apparently, the mercenary known as The Kakashi Spirit owned a small, local newspaper of the same name.
Hatate raised her hand. One of the waitresses took notice and rushed over to their table.
"How may I help--"
"One of your scallop dishes! Hey, Miss Margatroid! What do you want?" A flash of annoyance appeared on the waitress's face, but Hatate ignored it.
Alice smiled apologetically at the waitress, before ordering salad. The waitress left, and Alice turned to her mercenary guest. "So.... Miss Himekaidou.... As for the reason why I called you here..... I..... have someone I want dead."
Hatate's smile disappeared immediately. She reached into her purse, and Alice tensed, thinking that she was going for her gun. "You... Take this."
Alice caught the phone that the mercenary tossed at her. Hatate withdrew another cellphone, and began typing. The sleek black phone in Alice's hand began to ring. Alice flipped it open, and found a text message.
Is that why you asked me out? Geez, I guess my hunch was off.
Alice checked the sender, before typing up a response of her own.
What do you mean, Miss Himekaidou?
I totally thought you were a lesbian who wanted to go out with me.
Alice stared blankly, her jaw slowly dropping and her eyes widening. The scientist was spared having to answer, as their meals arrived then. Hatate dug in, leaving Alice to thank the waitress in her typical suave manner, before stabbing her fork into a piece of lettuce. Hatate's slurps and loud chews were the only sounds at their table.
"So.... Do you accept my preposition?" Hatate blinked at the scientist's suddenness.
"Depends. Finish your food, then we'll discuss this." She grinned. "Holy hell, this scallop is awsome!! Totally the best cafe ever!!" Hatate hurriedly shoveled more food into her mouth.
Alice likewise began to eat, though at a slower pace. She began to put together her reasons for wanting to have the people murdered. By the time Alice finished her salad, she had a speech that most politicians would die to have. In front of her Hatate was wiping her sauce-smeared face clean with a napkin, her checkered cellphone next to her empty plate.
"Hah, I've totally gotta come back here sometime! So delicious!" Hatate flipped her cellphone open and began typing.
So, give me a reason why you want me to assassinate these people.
Alice took her time typing.
Well, Miss Himekaidou. It is my belief that it is necessary to give you a small backstory, in order to explain my motives. Do you mind?
Alice unconsciously held her breath in anticipation, the old pain in her chest flaring as she waited for an answer.
Go ahead. I totally don't mind!
Alice let out the breath, and closed her eyes thoughtfully. She began placing the horrible events in order, and felt a small twinge in her shoulder. Alice rubbed the old injury uncomfortably, before typing.
Thank you. Alright...... Let's see..... When I was younger, I was severely disliked by the children of my neighborhood. My mother and her maid did their best to protect me, but it only lessened my pain. One day, as I was being attacked by a particularly nasty bully, another girl stepped in. She was my mother's friend's adopted daughter, and soon, we too became close friends. Ah..... Those were the days; spending the days happily with my mother, putting on puppet shows to amuse her and her friend, and of course, being with Marisa.
So you ARE a lesbian! Awesome!
...... Sure, why not? At any rate, we were together for quite a while, from childhood to college. We graduated early, and studied to become scientists. We succeeded, naturally. But on our first gig....
What was the gig?
Have you heard of the Master Spark Incident? The one where an entire laboratory blew up?
So your friend.....
Alice smiled bitterly, tears coming to her eyes as she remembered the explosions, the screams, and Marisa's broken, blackened body.
Was involved in that incident. Marisa; that's her name, and I were not in the building at the time. We both got away safely, but Marisa... Like the fool she is, ran inside to try and save stragglers. She succeeded, like she usually does, but at the cost of her own body. She is currently under the care of the scientist/doctor Yakogoro Eirin, so she's in good hands. Problem is, even with Miss Yakogoro's genius, her body will still be paralyzed, and the burns will never fade.....
Oh... I'm so sorry.
Don't dwell too much on it. At any rate, it hurt for me to even look at Marisa. She used to be so lively, so cheerful, so active! Now she's reduced to sitting in bed and doing extremely limited activities like reading.... Playing video games...... The point is, I'm involved in.... I guess you could say I specialize in robotics. And I want to make Marisa a new body.
But that would involve transferring all her organs to an entirely new body!
I forgot to mention that I want her to keep all her memories and every aspect of her personality before the accident.
But that's not possible!
It is. I'm so, so close! Though I'm only testing on animals for now. But you see.... There are some people who disapprove of what I'm doing. To the animals, I mean.
Animals? So you want me to off the head of the SPCA? That's totally easy!! I mean, I can shoot him while he's using the toilet at their next meeting!
No..... You see..... There are two.... Or three other animal fanatics that are extremely angry at me for, I quote, 'Abusing the poor things! Cutting out their organs and stuff! You need to be shut down before you hurt more animals, Unyu!'. End quote.
Unyu....? Oh no.
The Head of Peace...... Utsuho "Okuu" Reiujji.
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Baby Showers in My Gensoukyo? NEVER!
Marisa adjusted her hat, a beautifully wrapped present tucked under her other arm. She stood in the center of a long, long line of well-wishers. In front of the line sat Hakurei Reimu and her husband. It had been a year since Reimu had gotten married, and three months after she had become pregnant. Marisa narrowed her eyes and studied the lucky man. It was impossible to see his face, as his shaggy black hair covered everything above his nose.