Touhou doing re-inacting various Movie scenes n' quotes

[SuzumiyaIkari]

Take a movie scene or quote and Touhou-tize it

What i thought of recenty-

Ran: I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills danmaku; skills I have acquired over a very long life. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my shikigami go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
: Good Luck

Remilia: CAN YOU COUNT, SUCKERS? I SAY, THE FUTURE IS OUTS... if you can count!
Youkai #1: COME ON REMI WE?RE WITH YOU!
Youkai #2: GO AHEAD SIS!
Remilia: Now, look what we have here before us. We got the Phantom Blades sitting next to the Poison Dolls. We've got the Earth Bunnies right by the Firefly punks. Nobody is wasting nobody. That... is a miracle. And miracles is the way things ought to be.
[Few more Youkais cheering for Remilia]
Remilia: You're standing right now with nine delegates from 100 gangs. And there's over a hundred more. That's 20,000 hardcore youkais. Forty-thousand, counting affiliates, and twenty-thousand more, not organized, but ready to fight: 60,000 soldiers! Now, there ain't but 20,000 shrine maidens in the whole town. Can you dig it?
Youkais: Yeah.
Remilia: Can you dig it?
Youkais: Yeah!
Remilia: CAN YOU DIG IIIIIIIIIIIIIT?
[Youkais shouting and Cheering]
Remilia: Now, here's the sum total: One gang could run this city! One gang. Nothing would move without us allowing it to happen. We could tax the crime syndicates, the shrine maidens, because WE got the streets, suckers! CAN YOU DIG IIIIIIIIIIIIIT?
[Youkais shouting and Cheering again]
Remilia: The problem in the past has been the woman turning us against one another. We have been unable to see the truth, because we have fighting for ten square feet of ground, our land, our little piece of land. That's crap, sisters! The land is ours by right, because it's our turn. All we have to do is keep up the general truce. We take over one borough at a time. Secure our territory... secure our land... BECAUSE IT?S ALL OUR LAND
[Youkais shouting and Cheering again]

[Helix ⑨]

Gensokyo Wars:
Yukari: Ran, I am your mother.
Ran: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Yukari: Search your feelings, Ran.

The holy donation box:
Cirno: We are the bakas that say Ni!

[dustyjo]

So basically it's "Take a scene and replace the characters with Touhou characters, while not changing the dialogue or anything at all".

[Yakitori]

So basically it's "Take a scene and replace the characters with Touhou characters, while not changing the dialogue or anything at all".

Actually they did change the dialogue a little, but you're right. It's pretty much the same. Although, it could also be like "what Touhou character do you picture in this scene or which character would say what lines?" That would be a bit more interesting IMO.

[Reddyne]

Who stole one of my ideas for the Whose Line thread?! 

[Marin The Magus]

Gensokyo Wars:
Yukari: Maribel, I am your mother.
Maribel: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Yukari: Search your feelings, Maribel.

Fix'd
also, "Nameless hill":
Komachi: Eiki, someone's here to see you
Eiki: Tell that person that I'm not here
Komachi: it's ...something urgent
Eiki: if I hired someone useless would I have to pay that person the same money as you?

[KrackoCloud]

Orin: Oh, Utsuho!
Utsuho: It's all right, you're safe now. What are you doing out here?
Orin: I was so worried about you. Satori told me terrible things.
Utsuho: What things?
Orin: She said you have turned to the dark side.
Utsuho: Satori is trying to turn you against me.
Orin: She cares about us.
Utsuho: Us?!
Orin: She knows... She wants to help you.
Utsuho: Is Satori going to protect you? She can't... She can't help you. She's not strong enough.
Orin: Utsuho, all I want is your love.
Utsuho: Love won't save you, Orin. Only my new powers can do that.
Orin: At what cost? You are a good person. Don't do this.
Utsuho: I won't lose you the way I lost my mother! I've become more powerful than any youkai has ever dreamed of and I've done it for you. To protect you.
Orin: Come away with me. Help me raise our child. Leave everything else behind while we still can.
Utsuho: Don't you see, we don't have to run away anymore. I have brought peace to the underground. I am more powerful than the oni. I can overthrow Chireiden, and together you and I can rule all Gensokyo. Make things the way we want them to be.
Orin: I don't believe what I'm hearing... Satori was right. You've changed.
Utsuho: I don't want to hear any more about Satori. The youkai turned against me. Don't you turn against me.
Orin: I don't know you anymore. Utsuho, you're breaking my heart. I'll never stop loving you, but you're going down a path I can't follow!
Utsuho: Because of Satori?
Orin: Because of what you've done... what you plan to do. Stop, stop now. Come back! I love you.
Utsuho: Liar!
Orin: No!
Utsuho: You're with her. You've betrayed me! You brought her here to kill me!
Orin: NO! Utsuho. I swear... I...
Reimu: Let her go, Utsuho.
Utsuho: What have you and she been up to?
Reimu: Let her go!
Utsuho: You turned her against me.
Reimu: You have done that yourself.
Utsuho: You will not take her from me.
Reimu: Your anger and your lust for power have already done that. You have allowed the yatagarasu to twist your mind until now... until now you have become the very thing you swore to destroy.
***BGM: Sun Worship of Gnosis ~ Nuclear Fusion***
Utsuho: Don't lecture me, Reimu. I see through the lies of the miko. I do not fear the dark side as you do. I have brought peace, justice, freedom, and security to my new Empire.
Reimu: Your new Empire?
Utsuho: Don't make me kill you.
Reimu: Utsuho, my allegiance is to Gensokyo... To democracy.
Utsuho: If you're not with me, you're my enemy.
Reimu: Only a final boss deals in absolutes. I will do what I must.
Utsuho: You will try.

Sorry for making it go so long, but the whole dang scene works so well! Even the setting is all firey and stuff!

[SuzumiyaIkari]

Bravo KrackoCloud, bravo.

Heres a new one that i came up with.

In XXXX a crack commando team was sent to court for a crime they didn't commit. These women escaped a maximum security stockade the Gensokyo underground. Today, still wanted by the Shrine Maidens, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the O.M.A-Team.

Staring Yukari 'Hannibal' Yakumo, Yuyuko 'Faceman' Saigyouji, Yuka 'Murdock' Kazami, and Kanako Yasaka as "K.A Baracus.

[Marin The Magus]

"Liar liar" (sorry, couldn't change the tittle xD)
Characters:
Fletcher- Marisa
The judge- Shikieiki
Samantha Cole- Sakuya
Mr. Cole - Remilia
Dana- Yukari
Miranda - Patchy
Audrey - Alice
Jerry - Reimu
Max- Ehh...Medicine?

Now some quotes!

Marisa: Mrs. Izayoi. IS this a copy of your driver license? *shows her the paper*
Sakuya: Yes...
Marisa: It says that you have silver hair. Do you?
Sakuya: *sigh*...
Marisa: Well, if you don't remember, perhaps Remilia will...
Sakuya: I'm brunette!
Marisa: Thank you. Now...weight 105? Yeah-uh, in your pads
Yukari: Your honor, I object!
Marisa: You would!
Yukari: BASTARD!
Marisa: HAG!
Eiki: Quiet! overruled. *to Sakuya* weight?
Sakuya: 118......Fine! I'm 127.
Marisa: Alright, here it says that you were born in 1964, but that's not true, is it? IS IT?
Sakuya: No!
Marisa: Now let me get this straight. You lied to make yourself older. Why would any woman do that?
Sakuya: I changed it so I could get married
Marisa: AND THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE! My client lied about her age, so she was  17 when Remilia married her, a minor.And in the great state of California, no minor can enter into any legal contract without parental consent! This contract is VOID. The fact that my client has been ridden more than Seattle Slew is irrelevant. Standard community property applies and she is entitled to half the marital assests, or $11.395 million dollars. Jordan fades back, shwoosh, and THAT'S THE GAME! Nothing further, your honor.
---
Marisa: Are you marrying this girl because you are mad at me?
Alice: No - I got divorced because I was mad at you.
---
Marisa: Is this girl good for you? She's so not me!
Alice: that's one of his best qualities...
Marisa: Yeah, but she's kinda magoo
Alice: You're wrong! I mean, sometimes, maybe yes, she is a litte bit...
Marisa: Magoo!
Alice: yes
---
Reimu: I love you
Alice: uh...Thank you.
Reimu:...That's not the answer I hoped for.
Alice: Thank you very much?

[KrackoCloud]

France : Shanghai, what're you doing under the bed?
Shanghai : Uh... Nothing! Nothing. I'm sure Alice was just a little excited, that's all. Too much sugar in her tea, I suppose. It's just a mistake.
Russia : Well, that mistake is sitting in your spot, Shanghai.
London : Have you been replaced?!
Shanghai : Hey!  What did I tell you earlier? No one is getting replaced. Now let's all be polite, and give whatever it is up there a nice, big "Alice's Room" welcome.
-----
Shanghai : YOU ARE A DOLL!!!  You aren't a real person from Hourai, you're a figurine with a noose around your neck!  You are a witch's plaything!!

[De La Witch]

Hijiri: What the heck is going on up there, why haven?t you guys left yet?
Murasa: We?re going Hijiri. Makai, we have OMS pod restart!
Ichirin: Restart confirmed!
*palanquin ship sputters and dies.*
Murasa: What?s the problem?
Ichirin: I don?t know
Shou: What?s wrong!?
Murasa: Fix it, now!
*ship sputters and dies again*
Murasa: We?ve got no time! No time!
*Ichirin jumps out of her seat and rushes downstairs, Shou rolls her eyes, throws off her safety harness, and follows her down. *
Random youkai 1: Where are you guys going?
Nazrin: Oh come on, we?re staying, we?re going, we?re staying, we?re going, make up your mind!
Hijiri: Dang it Murasa, get out of here, you?ve got less than 3 minutes!
*Ichirin starts flipping random buttons on engine control panel*
Murasa *whispers urgently*: C?mon Ichirin, c?mon c?mon!
Nazrin: Blow the bomb up Hijiri, we?re with you!
*Shou comes up behind Ichirin*
Shou: Aah, it?s stuck yes?
*Ichirin throws instructions against Shou in frustration*
Ichirin: Oh, back off, you don?t know the components.
*Shou steps forward and observes the machine*
Shou: Gensokyo components, Eintei Components, Makai Components, ALL MADE BY KAPPA!
Shinki: It?s time for ignition Palaquin!
Murasa: Makai, we have NO fire!
Nazrin: What?s that mean!?
Murasa: Means we?ve got a busted ship.
Nazrin: A busted ship? And I?m trapped in here? I had a great spot picked out there!!
Shinki: Palaquin, you fire that engine. If there?s not a way, you find a way. The clock?s ticking, let?s go! Let?s fire that engine Palaquin!
Hijiri: You?ve got less than a minute, don?t think I won?t blow this thing!
*explosion blows Hijiri off balance*
Hijiri: Gah! *cough, cough*, Murasa get out of here, it?s getting bad down here.
*downstairs, Shou is still hounding Ichirin*
Shou: I know how to fix it, PLEASE move, I have to take you away if you don?t move.
Shinki: Murasa, you?ve got to get that ship started, you?ve got to fire it up, NOW!
Hijiri: Dangit Murasa! Get off this rock!
Shou: I?m telling you, PLEASE MOVE! *grabs Ichirin and shoves her out of the way, proceeds to pick up a Gohei*
Shou: THIS, is how we fix things in the MY-slam!-OU-slam!-REN-slam!-SHRINE *keeps slamming the engine with the gohei* -BECAUE I DON?T WANT TO STAY HERE ANY LONGE-
*with a shudder, ship starts*
Shou *slams gohei to the floor*: YEA, FINALLY, WE CAN GO HOME!
Murasa: She?s got me back, she?s got me back!
Random youkai in control room #2: We?re hot!
Murasa: Ichirin, let?s go, let?s go!
Hijiri *stares at unmoving ship, shakes head*: Wait all you want, stupid.
*crew aboard ship is scrambling to get into their seats*
Murasa: We don?t have time. Hurry, hurry, we got NO time! Initiate thrusters on my mark 2?1? FIRE!
*ship flies off asteroid back into safety of earth, Hijiri blows up asteroid, earth is saved. YAAAAY*

[Marokuu]

@KrakoCloud Briliant that is all

[roy42osborne]

Watched it and all are pretty same....

[Aquila]

Shanghai : YOU ARE A DOLL!!!  You aren't a real person from Hourai, you're a figurine with a noose around your neck!  You are a witch's plaything!!

You are a sad, strange little doll... And you have my pity... Farewell!

Doll Story...

Yes yes yes and more yes!

[Forte Blackadder]

Yakumo Yukari is sat at her desk with new employee Sanae sat in front of her.

Yukari: Hope this doesn't embarrass you Sanae, but I find the best thing to do with a new employee is to size them up with a long, hard stare.

(Yukari stares long and hard)

So!

Sanae: So.

Yukari: First day.

Sanae: Yes.

Yukari: Scary.

Sanae: Yes.

Yukari: Don't be scared.

Sanae: Well I'm not really scared...

Yukari: You should be.

Sanae: Well I am a little bit scared.

Yukari: What? Don't be!

Sanae: Make up your mind!

Yukari: Ha ha ha!

Sanae: Ha ha ha...

Yukari: So, here you are.

Sanae: Yes, really looking forward to getting to grips with...

Yukari: I'm gonna put you in Y.E. (Youkai Exorcising) because you said on your CV you have a lot of experience with seals.

Sanae: I did say that on my CV, yes. I have a lot of experience with the whole seal thing you know, papers, throwing papers, drawing papers, burning papers, I could go on.

Yukari: Do.

Sanae: The chores. Using a needle, broom, using broom. Shouting, screaming. The goddess, of course. The frogs. The... bit that goes on the floor down there.

Yukari: The snakes.

Sanae: Correct.

Yukari: A ha! Well, you certainly seem to know your stuffs. That's settled then. I've got a good feeling about you Sanae and they need a new manager.

Sanae: Fantastic, so the people I'll be working with, what are they like?

Yukari: Lazy kids!

Cut to Marisa's desk in the shrine. Phone is ringing and she is drinking coffee and licking doughnut sugar from her fingers.

(answers phone)

Marisa: Y.E ze. Have you tried slapping his head over and over again? OK, well, the eyes, are they glowing? Yeah, you need to hit it hard. Err, the head of the possessed guy.

*enters Reimu who tosses Marisa a taiyaki*

Marisa: Yeah, you do know where the head is, don't you? No, not on coins.

*Reimu's phone rings. she answers it.*

Reimu: Hello YE. Uh huh. Have you tried forcing an unexpected anaesthetic?

Marisa: No, there you go, I just heard it come out. No, that's the sound you hear when it comes out. No, that's the sound you hear when... I'm sorry, are you from the past?

Reimu: You see the youkai hooks a host by patching the nervous system core so it's not safe to enliven him unless another threat is about to jump in there and do its stuff. And you don't want to end up in the middle of invalid memory ha ha ha... Hello?

Marisa: Oh really?! Well why don't you come up here and meet me then. What? You think I'm afraid of you? I'm not afraid of you, you can come to the shrine here any time and I'll be waiting for ya! (hangs up and sits back in chair) Stupid Flandre. Damn it's about time you got back it's been all go.

Reimu: You had a job?

Marisa: Girl in the library.

Reimu: Did you and her, hit it off?

Marisa: Define "hit it off"?

Reimu: Did she continue talking to you once you'd exorcised the youkai?

Marisa: No. And while I was working on it, she rested a cup on my back.

Reimu: No!

Marisa: Yup. *shows her back with a tea stain*

Reimu: Unbelievable!

Marisa: Yup they have no respect for us down there. No respect whatsoever. We're all just drudgeons to them.

Reimu: Yes. If there were such a thing as a drudgeon, that is what we would be to them.

Marisa: It's like they're pally-wally when there's a problem with their shelves, but once it's fixed...

Reimu: They toss us away like yesterday's jam.

Marisa: YES! Like yesterday's jam! That is what we are! To them! (phone rings, Marisa picks it up) Err you know what, that doesn't really to work as a thing, 'cos jam lasts for ages... Hello YE. Have you tried hitting his head over and over again?

[Arcorann]

Ah, the IT Crowd... I wonder how many people on here would have gotten that.

Also, both of KrackoCloud's are awesome.

[Forte Blackadder]

Akyuu: Okay, children, let's take our seats. We have a lot to learn today.
Keine: We sure do, Ms.Hieda. Okay, children, let's start the day with a few new math problems. What is five minus four? ...Come on children, don't be shy.  Just give it your best shot. [Cirno smiles and raises her hand]
Keine: Yes, Cirno?
Cirno: Nine?
Keine: Okay. Now let's try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete idiot. Anyone?... Come on, don't be shy.
Flandre: I think I know the answer, Ms.Keine.
Rumia: Is that so ~
Flandre: Shut up you retarded blondie!
Rumia: Ey! Don't call me retarded, you fuckin' Jew!
Keine: Rumia! Did you just say the F-word??
Rumia: ... Is that so?
Flandre:   Yes, she's talkin' about "fuck." You can't say "fuck" in school, you fuckin' retard.
Keine: Scarlet!
Rumia: Why the fuck not?
Keine: Rumia!
Tewi: Mate, you just said "fuck" again!
Keine: Inaba!
Wriggle: Fu!
Keine: Nightbug!
Rumia: What's the big deal? It doesn't hurt anybody. Fuck fuckity fuck fucking fuck.
Keine: How would you like to go see the school counselor?!
Rumia: How would you like to suck my balls?
Class: Ooooh.
Keine: What did you say?!
Rumia: Oh, I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Actually, what I said was: [picks up a megaphone, turns it on, and speaks] "How would you like to suck my balls, Keine-sensei?!"
Flandre:   You don't have balls, dude.

[KrackoCloud]

Koishi : What do you want from us?
Renko : Inception. Is it possible?
Alice : Of course not.
Renko : If you can steal an idea from someone's mind, why can't you plant one there instead?
Alice : Okay, here's planting an idea. I say to you, "Don't think about Yukari." What are you thinking about?
Renko : ... Darnit, Yukari!
-----
Koishi : Somnacin?
Eirin : Eirin's Somnacin.
Koishi : As good as the real thing?
Eirin : Better.
-----
Alice : Koishi said you'd be back.
Maribel : I tried not to come, but...
Alice : But there's nothing quite like it.
Maribel : It's just... Pure creation."
-----
Yukari : Let me tell you a riddle. You're waiting for a train. A train that will take you far away. You know where you hope the train will take you, but you can't be sure. Yet it doesn't matter. Now, tell me why?



And somewhere in there, Nue as Eames, and Moriya Engineering in place of Cobol Engineering. Yay!