Well, hello everybody, and welcome to my beautifully bad fan fiction. Honestly, if there was an award for bad fanfic, I would totally get it.
Well, anyway, as a lot of you already know, I use OC’s in my fics. Since you cant really know somebody without learning about them first, I am crafting a set of fics that showcase these Canon and OC’s first meetings. This way, I can get everybody to know and actually care about/like these stupid guys. …
A here's a little intro for you guys (You can TL;DR this, if you want) :
I begin this saga by stating a few things. The fist is that I am an amateur. I am not an amazing writer, nor do I ever claim to be. What I do is write for fun. That's it. I write to show off my creative talent and to entertain people. And this leads to one simple statement:
I am not an amazing writer like Muffin or Ruro.
What am I? I am a 14-year-old American youth. That's it. Don't expect epic, sweeping tales of drama here-- at the very least, don't expect that from this fic. If you want that from me, wait until I publish HellFire Catharsis, then you can see my serious side. On the other hand, don't expect amazing, flowing, simply beautiful writing either. I have a dry and sarcastic style that is devoid of stuff like symbolism or anything deep like that. In this fic, on the other hand, I try to deftly mix romance, drama and comedy into a crazy.....something. Right now, you may ask, “Wait, Chagen/Deathshot! You just said that there wasn't going to be any sweeping tales of romance and drama!” Well, first, I would like to point out that I didn't mention drama, and, second, that I didn't say there wasn't going to be romance. I like to combine things; after all, any good work has a little bit of everything in, after all. What I meant was not to expect epic things to happen.....at least, not in the beginning.
But I am starting to ramble. To end this into, I will state that this fic has two main arcs:
In the first arc, Gensokyo's about to get a lot crazier than anyone thought, with the arrival of several new—and male—inhabitants. These....interesting guys soon meet various girls you all know and love (and perhaps hate...) and soon....well.....something happens. Whether it's a pervert Kitsune, and crazy Mecha Otaku, a submissive Vampire Cop, a Nekomata Street Racer, a Nuke-Happy Omnicidal Madman, a crazy Italian Scientist (who you're just about to meet), or a emo tengu, Gensokyo's gonna be different, that's for sure.
Second Arc......well, things are going to get more serious than the first one. With all the characters in place, this arc sets itself up for drama and ANGST.
Okay, so it's not gonna be like a a rejected Fall Out Boy song (Though they are a fucking awesome band), but let's say that this arc has more character development and romance in it. This is where the Touhou Girls and The OC's start to actually like each other (Or, to put it better, “The TG don't want to strangle the TO half to death). Of course, this leads to some actual conflict.
Or hilarious scenes of the two group beating the shit out of each other.
It's so difficult to determine~
…..Uh, moving on, in case you are completely incapable of retaining information you just read, this fic uses OC's. Do NOT read if you are closed-minded enough to not view this fic with anything other than hatred of it for that one detail—granted, it is a BIG detail--, then do not read. I did not write this story so some asshole can throw around the words “Marty Stu”. If they are showing some tendencies, then by all means, tell me. What I don't want is baseless criticism.
Woah, I'm rambling again.
Fuck it, let's just start the story. Oh, and some of Tagento's Italian might be poor. That;s because Babelfish isn't the most reliable of things for translation:
Chapter 1: Mother Italia.
Location: Marisa Kirasame’s House
Date (Outside World): 3/14/10
God, this place was so boring.
Well, Gensokyo wasn’t that boring; it was just so ordinary to me now. You see Youkai and Gods and psychopathic Shrine Maidens every day, it becomes routine. What I needed was something different to happen.
I’m Marisa Kirasame, by the way. You probably know me already: “Crazy-Ass Magician that was kicked out of the house by her father and makes her time coming up with useless but crazy stuff and blowing up just about everything she sees”. To be honest, that’s not far from the truth.
So, Reimu had gotten sick of my antics and Alice was locked up in her house doing god only knows what with her doll fetish. Everyone else was doing their damnedest to come up with an excuse not to spend any time with me. I guess when you have a reputation for blowing shit up, people try to keep their distance.
Byakuren was busy dealing with her temple, Remilia had "Family Issues" (What Family?), Eirin and Kaguya were doing......something, and Satori and Koishi just had Utsuho throw me out when I asked.
Now, I had nothing to do except stay in my house. Yeah, that sounds real fun. But hey, you can’t always get your way. That's what my dad said when he kicked me out of our house after my mom disappeared. Never talked to him after that. Like I fucking cared.
So, I dragged myself back to my house. Once inside, I just fell on the floor and stared at the ceiling. There wasn’t much else to do, after all. AUGH! Why cant something interesting happen!?
Well, something interesting did happen.
Something very interesting.
“CHE COSA INFERNO!?”
I burst out of my house, grabbing my broom along the way. I couldn’t understand that language, but it was clear a boy said it. Whatever it was, it would’ve been a Youkai. And at least beating up Youkai was fun. Perhaps a human from the outside world? But that wasn’t Japanese. In fact, I think I had heard that language before, between that crazy Vampire, Remilia Scarlet, and her Librarian, Patchouli Knowledge. I believe it was called “Italian”…
“I’m here, Idiota.”
Before he could even react, I punched him in the side of the head, sending him into the nearest tree. If he was a Youkai, though, that wouldn’t have the least effect, so I was about to pull out a spellcard, until I noticed that boy—well, he actually a man in his twenties--looked very familiar-
“Who?” The bo-…guy replied. His face was turned away from me.
“Are you Rinnosuke Morichika?
“No, I am not. What I am is Tagento Staccato.”
He turned to face me. Though his face was bloody, I could already see the resemblance, This “Tagento” figure looked quite similar to another man I knew: Rinnosuke Morichika. Yet both were different enough to be distinguished. Both had short gray hair (Tagento’s was longer and messier). Both wore glasses (Tagento’s were square and didn’t cover half his eyes, Rinnosuke’s were round). Both had the same overall body shape (Tagento was shorter but much more imposing….). However, Tagento was wearing some kind of long and white coat. Rinnosuke had gotten one, and called it a “lab coat”. I guess that’s what I’ll refer it to.
“Just who are you?” I asked.
Tagento wiped his glasses on his coat. “I believe I should be asking you that question.” He put them back on. “I believe I would like an explanation.” He angrily emphasized that last word.
“Look, you really don’t want to piss me off, which you are doing.”
“That doesn’t matter. What matters is why a 13-year-old ragazza in some kind of screwed-up magician outfit is telling me not to piss her off.”
Geez, what pissed you the fuck off today?
“Well, fuck you too. And I’m twenty-two, thank you very much.
“You sure don’t look it. You only come to my chin.”
…Dammit, he was right; I only did come up to his chin.
“And that punch hurt. What the hell was that for, anyway?”
“I thought you were a Youkai.”
He looked confused. “Youkai? Youkai don’t exist. I swear, start spouting any more crap, and I’m gonna call the mental institution.”
Oh, this one is always funny. Humans of the outside world have a small device called a Cell Phone that they use to communicate with other people. Unfortunately, you don’t get any reception in genso. It’s always hilarious to see them try to use it, and freak out when it doesn’t work.
He took his out a small pocket, and dialed some numbers on it. After that, he placed it to his ear.
“Come on now…”
"Siamo spiacenti, ma-- "
As I said, always funny.
“So, your little phone doesn’t work.”
“Look, who the hell are you?”
Ugh. Standing was getting annoying. “Follow me to my house.” I started to walk off. Whether or not he followed was his choice.
Inside my house, Tagento admired quite a few of my possessions. "Looks very.....Japanese...."
"That's because it is Japanese."
"How’s a little girl like you get a house like this?"
Oh, there you go with that little girl bullshit again.
"Look, I'm twenty-two. That's a fact."
"But....you look like a ten-year-old......"
"Why? Is there something about me that makes me look so young?"
"I guess it's the hat."
I wondered what he thought about me without the hat, so I took it off. "Well, how about now?"
"Well....you look older and younger at the same time. You look older because you don't have the ridiculous hat on. On the other hand, You appear younger because of your hair and your face....but I must say, you are rather cute, like my....n-nevermind."
I didn't know why, but his comment made me feel better for some reason. I didn't want to admit it, but I blushed a little.
"It's nothing. I mean it. It's just....I dont think anybody has ever called me cute-well, lots of girls, but no guys....They all think I look like a little girl, like you did."
"Well, you look like a little girl and a grown woman at the same time...but it's that strange contrast that makes you cute." He smiled in a sort of smirk, but it wasn't insulting. He clearly was a person who idn't hand out smiles and compliments very often.
I was about to say something, before I realized I hadn't told Tagento my name. "Wait, I haven't even told you my name! I'm Marisa. Marisa Kirasame."
"Well, I must thank you telling me your name. I was wondering if you had one at all."
"Um...come on into the guest room."
I led Tagento into the guest room, a room I had furnished with things from the outside world (I picked them up at Rinnosuke's). It was made in case someone from the outside went through the boundary and landed up near my House, which, in case you bothered to read what I had just wrote, had just happened. However, I ended using it as a reading room--hey, don't get mad at me, sofas are comfortable!
As such, it was absolutely packed with books. And it seemed that Tagento really loved books, because as he saw it, he basically had an orgasm. Seriously, he acted like I didn't even exist and bolted for the shelves, and he must've spent at least an hour picking ones off the shelves, putting some back, picking up some more, putting some back....by the time he was done, he had a armful of literally 20 books.
".....So I guess you like books."
"What made you guess?" He said in a light-hearted tone.
I dont know, the fact that you spent an hour picking them out?
"...It's not use trying to get a straight answer out of you." He pulled one off the top shelf. But I noticed something. A lot of these are magic books. I mean, magic doesn't exist."
"Yes it does." I deadpanned.
"No, it doesn't-"
"It does. We're going to Yukari."
Yukari Yakumo. The Youkai of boundaries. She would be able to explain everything to Tagento. That is, if I was able to wake her lazy ass up. Getting to her was the easy part. Well, her house is way the hell in the middle of nowhere, but through the use of magic, its location can be pinpointed, though it was really difficult.
Except I didn't need to use any magic; because there was a portal (well, gap, to be correct) right were Tagento was. Looks like she was expecting him.
"What the hell?" Tagento said, astonished, as he got a good look at the gap. "That's impossible. A perfect tear in the space-time continuum, yet it does not go out of control and destroy everything..."
"That's a gap. It'll let us go to Yukari's house."
"You mean, in an instant? But, then it's a wormhole!"
"Anyway, it was made by Yukari."
"Wait, one person made this thing? ....Okay, I want some answers."
"Then step right in."
If you've never traveled by gap before, it's an odd experience. First, you've got to steel your resolve enough to step in a creepy hole covered in eyes. Then, you had to accept the fact that, as Yukari controlled it, she could just throw you out anywhere, and trust me, she was enough of an asshole to do it.
Then, it's just sort of existential floating for a few seconds, then you get thrown out. Hopefully where you wanted to go.
This didn't seem to effect Tagento, however, as he boldly stepped in while yelling, "FOR SCIENCE!".
.....okay. Whatever floats your boat.
I stepped in moments later, and was thrown out. Into Tagento. He was nearly knocked off his feet, but regained his composure. Dammit, Yukari.
"I see you've already arrived."
There she was, Yukari Yakumo, annoying bitch. She looked so ostentatious, with her flamboyant white dress and unnecessary parasol.
"Whoa, you're awake. That's something new."
"I wish to inquire with the boy with you."
"Well, yeah, since you dragged him here."
She looked at me with a worried face. "That's the problem. I didn't create that break in the boundary.
Wait, you didn't do that? Yukari was the only creature in Gensokyo who could manipulate boundaries like that. No one else could. That was pretty much fact.
"What do you mean? You're the only one who screw with boundaries like that!"
"I know." She sighed. "Someone, someone in Gensokyo, has used a massive amount of power to forcefully create a rift in the boundary. Worse, they were able to hide it from me completely."
This was bad, Yukari looked worried. Yukari never looks worried.
"You never found out about it?"
"Yes. I was not aware of it until that boy came today."
Okay, this wasn't not looking good.
"This is bad. Very bad."
"Don't be so pessimistic. The amount of energy required to do such a thing, unless you have my innate ability, is extremely high. It will quite a while until whoever did it will be able to do it again."
I hope you're right.
"Excuse me?" Tagento asked impatiently. "Do I not exist? I would prefer some filling in on what the hell is going on? And, why does everyone who lives here look like a little girl?"
Yukari looks a little girl to you?
"I'm sorry that you do not approve of our looks." I sarcastically replied.
"I wasn't saying that in an insulting way. This place just looks like an ephebe's dream...."
"Get inside, dammit." I grabbed his hand and dragged him into the house. This guy was really annoying; he would've been probably dead if I hadn't found him, and he responds by being a dick? "Where's Ran and Chen?"
"Out doing something." Yukari hastily replied. "They wont be back for a couple of hours."
"That is unimportant to you."
I think it is.
"Well, no mind-”
"OW! Don't pull me so roughly!"
"-we have more important issues at hand."
I led Tagento into a small room with two chairs and nothing more. He got the idea and sat down in one of them. Yukari sat down in another.
"You are not in the outside world anymore."
She ignored him. "You are in a sealed off region of Japan."
"This region was sealed off years before your birth.”
"This region's name is Gensokyo."
"Gensokyo is a area connected to the outside world--where you came from—but not a part of it. It used to be a region of Japan, but was sealed off in 1884 A.D."
"Wait, I remember that! I remember there many books of that region's disappearance, but none could find a conclusion!"
"Of course. We wouldn't be that care-less. We are not incompetent. In any case, you would never be able to explain it."
"And why is that? There surely must be a way to explain such phenomena."
"You can't, because Gensokyo is built on magic."
"Magic doesn't exist-"
"Listen. Gensokyo is a haven for magic and fantastical creatures. It was created because the outside world became increasingly scientific and started to fear creatures such as me."
"What? But you’re a hum-"
"I am a Youkai. I assume you don’t know what that is?"
"...No, I do know. I spent quite some time in Japan for the purpose of a science conference. There, I learned a lot about Japanese Mythology."
"Oh, then you know the various kinds of Youkai--Tengu, Nekomata, Oni, and others?"
"Yes.....but how can you be a youkai? You look like a normal woman!"
"Then let me demonstrate. I have the innate ability to manipulate borders. Tell me, what is the opposite of Light?"
"Therefore, I shall manipulate the border of Light and Dark." Yukari barely moved, and the inside of the room was plunged into a complete darkness. I could hear Tagento standing up in shock.
"I-I-Impossible! Light is the emission of photons from a source; Dark is the absence of it! The room cant be this dark, the sun is still shining!"
"Then the only way to explain it, " I shrewdly replied. "is magic."
The room was flooded with light again, and Tagento just fell in his chair, looking defeated. "Everything I learned.....Everything could come undone......"
Yukari smirked and got up. "You see? I control boundaries, so I could make the room dark at will. That isn't the limit of my power. I could change the night to day, erase things completely out of existence.....my power is almost omnipotent. I have lived for thousands of years, and yet I probably haven't even scratched the surface of my powers."
Tagento slowly stood out of his chair and paced around the room for a minute. Finally, while staring out a window, he started to speak.
"....so I just have to accept things my line of work disproves. I have to believe this, because it exists here. I don't know what to think." He pointed at me in an exaggerated way. "I could be going insane; Marisa here could just be some Freudian bullshit in my fucked up mind about my severe want for a girlfriend and perhaps a want to fuck my-" He stopped himself abruptly. ".....Never mind...."
Who was this person he keeps talking about? He couldn't bear to mention who he/she/it was, but how was that going to help?
"That's the way things go." I replied with a shrug. "Whether or not you want to believe it."
"I can take you back to your world." Yukari commented. "It wouldn't be that difficult."
Tagento shook his head. "No. At least, not right now."
"Are you sure? Don't you think your family might be worried?"
"Don't worry about them. I'll think for a few days; I'll tell you whether or not I want to stay."
The room was filled with an awkward silence. Nobody really had anything to say, so we just stood there and looked at each other.
I walked to the door. "I'm going outside."
Such an interesting figure. Tagento, that is. Usually when I met someone, I just had to throw down some trash talk and quasi-metaphorically shoot the fuck out of them. But Tagento was different. Maybe it was because I wasn't focused on beating him up and jacking his shit that I could get to know him better. Then again, if that was true, then I probably could apply that to everybody.
Perhaps it was simply because he was a guy. I, and a lot of the other people I associated with, never really dealt with guys constantly. Well, I did have Rinnosuke, but he was rather cold and was always alone. That wasn't to say Tagento was, but still.... I couldn't lay my hand on it. Damn, he made my head hurt.
"Do you have a headache?"
It was Tagento. He walked over to me. "I talked with Yukari for a little bit, she is an interesting per-...Youkai."
"Yeah, all she does is make my head hurt."
"I understood her well enough."
"What are you, some kind of super-genius?"
"Actually, yes, I am. Top class Scientist, though I specialize in Physics and Engineering."
"Interesting." My voice said otherwise.
"...Let's go back to your house."
"Why not let Yukari warp us back?"
"She fell asleep."
God dammit. Yukari, you lazy bitch. "Let's just go." I said, exasperated. Tagento silently went on.
Later, we were walking through the Forest of Magic, the barely-visible sky an orange-red. Tagento hadn't said anything since we left Yukari's place.
"Aren't you going to say anything?"
"Aren't you thinking about whether you want to stay or not?"
"I guess I am. I think I actually might stay."
"Don't you want to go back to your family? I mean, you'll never see them again."
"My family is all dead."
...."Well, that....is...uh...." My voice was a little shaky. It was the only thing I could say. I looked down at the ground.
"It's okay. A lot of people are shocked when they hear."
“But....I don't really....I'm sorry I asked....”
“Nah, I don't mind. In fact, it's rather refreshing to be able to talk about it.”
".....But why? What happened to them?"
"But, you're only 22-"
"No, I am eighty years old."
....What. Eighty. Eighty. How the hell...just what....
"I know it makes no sense. When I was 22, I invented a technology that greatly extended life. With it, it takes 100 years to age one year biologically. For example, if used at birth, a person who would normally live 90 years, would live 9000."
"That's impressive....so, biologically, you're 22, but chronologically, you're 80. "
"But, when I used it, it could only hold one charge. So, I became selfish....and I used on myself. I thought I could amass a huge well of knowledge....I thought I could humanity reach it's peak. And I was happy.
“But, then, my family moved on without. I was forced to watch as my family changed....as my younger siblings became older than me, as they went on to get married and have kids....and, even as they were old and dying, I was unchanged and young. My younger sister and brother started to hate me, for being able to live longer than they could. They looked at me with contempt and undeniable hatred. I was banned from their parties and meetings. I couldn't even see their children. I was soon not even recognized. One day, while I was at science expo, my parents attended. Soon, one interviewer asked them about their son, Tagento Staccato. They claimed they had no such son, even as I stood behind them. Later, they left, and I remember running up to their car, and calling them out on this. My father replied. 'You are no son of ours, you disgusting abomination.'”
“When they died, they cursed my name, and their wills left nothing to me....some days, I curse that machine...."
I noticed a small dark spot on the ground. When I looked up at Tagento, I noticed that tears were running down his cheeks. It was almost weird; I couldn't imagine him to be the type to cry.
Yet, he reminded me of how my father felt when I stated my want to be a magician.....
"Hey, I didn’t mean...." God, now I felt like an asshole.
"It's fine." His voice was rather sympathetic.
“Hey, if it makes you fell any better....I used to go through the same hate....because of my want to be a magician. My father didn't like that very much....”
“I don't know how anybody could dislike you, though. I mean....you are rather smart.....” He smiled that smirk of his. “And, if I may say, rather beautiful, as well.”
“Are you trying to flirt with me?” I knew, no matter how much I denied it, that I was blushing.
“Us Italians are known for our women-getting skills....though I believe mine are a bit dull from lack of use....” He laughed at his self-depreciation. Then he turned away from me and wiped his glasses on his coat. "Let's go." He started off without waiting for me.
"Woah, you don't even know the direction to the house!"
"Don't you mean to your house? I don't live there."
"Well, you do now."
"I guess you could make the accommodations." He scanned the nearby area. "By the way, I was wondering, is it difficult to dig through the dirt around your house?"
"Why do you care?"
He smiled that damn smirk again.
"Time will solve that mystery."
He didn't say anything else the whole rest of the way. Once we had gotten back to the house, he went into the guest room and started reading. I just went back to mine and started making some things to sell in my shop.
A few hours later, and it was completely black outside.
"Wha-" Tagento had come up behind me. "Dammit, don't do that!"
"Sorry. I heard that you had a shop."
"Heh, yeah." I sarcastically replied. "Haven't sold anything since the damn thing started."
"Well, I was just wondering. Perhaps I could help you sell things. I am a good inventor."
"Good Luck. Shit, you can just take over the shop. Like I give a damn."
"Well, I wont go that far. But I can't invent till I have a lab running. In order to do that, I need an extremely large source of power. And I don't think there is a large source of energy anywhere near here."
"There's Okuu's reactor."
"Okuu. Well, her name is Utsuho Reiuji. Anyway, she's a Hell Raven that runs a large nuclear reactor in hell."
"Yes. Well, the old hell, not the one we use now."
"Well.....I mean, knowing you, it's not that surprising if you had BEEN damned-"
"I HAD TO GO BEAT HER THE FUCK UP, OKAY!"
"Jeez, you didn't have to bite my head off for it." He held his hands up like it was some big joke. "But, anyway, I think I shall pay a visit to this Utsuho tomorrow."
"Just call her Okuu."
"No, I believe I should give her utmost respect."
"Whatever you feel like. You going to bed or what?"
"I guess I shall."
"And by the way, I'm going to go with you on that trip tomorrow. Don't ask me why, I just am."
"I'll be leaving." He bowed pompously and walked out of the room. Uptight bastard. Why can't he just be normal?
"Fine with me." I put down the firework I was working on. Couldn't focus enough to even assemble the shell. "I should be going to bed." I was so tired, however, that I considered just falling asleep at the desk.
Ugh....I had woken up wanting something new to happen, and now that something had happened, I wondered whether or not it was actually good. I was worried that Tagento might choose to leave Gensokyo instead of staying. And, as amazing it may seem to a few of you, I didn't want that.
Oh well,I thought, I should go to sleep. The Hell of Blazing Fires is rather far from here.
I set up a few magical barriers in case Tagento tried to do something funny, and just fell asleep in that chair.
.....And I have no real way to wrap that one up. Yay. Hope you found it worth your time. That's the joy of life.
If anyone wants to know, Tagento's theme song (since everyone in Gensokyo needs a theme song ,after all) is "Hate-Colored Master Spark". The Marisa vs. Tagento theme is "The Thin Line Between Love and Hate". They are not named that way because the two grow to hate each other, there's a different reason.