My first Touhou-related work. Double-spaced
for your reading pleasure.
?Alice, open up!? I yelled, pounded the brass knocker into its frame.
?Alice, it?s me! Hey, Alice! You there??
Not waiting for a decent response, I kicked in the door, which creaked open rather easily for its size.
?Don?t mind if I do!? To my surprise, I was not greeted immediately with the usual shouting of empty threats.
?Hey Alice, where?d ya go? I?ve been knockin? for a good five minutes!? I made my way through the silent living room towards the kitchen.
?Listen, I?ve been thinkin?, and I?ve decided.?
I opened the refrigerator, which had a sheet of paper with a bunch of food and things written on it.
?I?ll return everything later,? I muttered while adding an apple to the growing list. It had gone bad, so I threw it over my head
and it turned into Patchouli.
?Make that two?? I took another one out and corrected the paper.
I called out once more. ?Alice? Hey, Alice! Don?t make me look for you!?
?Alice? Come on, say something!?
I started to search the rest of the house for any sign of my doll-maker. The living room was already clear.
?Alice!?
No one in the library.
?Alice! Where are you??
She was not in the dolls? room.
?Alice? You in here??
The bathroom was empty.
?Alice??
I arrived at the one place I had promised never to enter without permission: her bedroom. I cautiously tapped the door. It slid forward a little. It had always been locked.
?Alice? Al-?
Less than three feet away, my Alice lay sprawled in a pool of her own blood, cold. I dropped the apple.
?Alice! What-??
I pulled her out of the little red lake. Her neck was covered in gashes.
?Alice! Speak to me, Alice! Come on!?
I grabbed her delicate hands, this time not for kicks. They were covered with blood. Her blood.
?Alice? What did you do to yourself? Tell me, Alice! Speak!?
Her cute little head rolled lifelessly to one side.
?No, no, no! Alice! Don?t leave!?
This can?t be happening. There?s no way. Everything was perfect.
?Come back to me, Alice!?
My Alice. You can?t leave me, Alice. We?re supposed to be together.
?Come back!?
Alice, you can?t go.
?Alice!?
You?re gone.
?We?ve got quite a mess on our hands,? I said, staring down at the young girl?s corpse. I overheard the name ?Alice? on a homicide report that came in this morning, and I was wondering if it was the one I knew. It was, and I didn?t feel any better.
?And what sort of mess is tha-? said someone who had just walked in. ?Oh damn.?
Hakurei Reimu, vigilante. She?s known for her use of excessive force, her impeccably short temper, and her amazing metabolism. Hakurei?s been indicted several times on account of her rabblerousing, but I?ve had to dismiss them all. Sure, she?s a little too pushy. Sure, she?s acting within my jurisdiction without my permission. Sure, she?s breaking the law. But I can?t get rid of her, not even for a second. She gets results. By Byakuren she gets results. I?ve no idea how long I?ve wished for someone else in my department besides me who?s as dedicated to at least some form of justice as her. But right now I didn?t need her here. In fact, it?d be better if she was somewhere else right now. Somewhere very far away from this place.
?Miss Hakurei, may I ask you to not use profanities at least while you are in my presence as well as to what you are doing here before I have someone escort you out??
?So you?re here, too, Shikieki? I heard that something had happened to Alice, and at first I assumed the worst. I came over to check to see if I was as wrong as I hoped I was.?
She was still as nosy as ever. And disrespectful to boot.
She continued. ?You?re in charge, right? Who found Alice??
?What kind of relationship do you have with Miss Margatroid??
I?m betting I sounded pretty stupid right now.
?I?m pretty sure you didn?t have to ask that question.?
Of course I knew that. I wouldn?t have if I didn?t have to.
?We have a death on our hands. This is purely for the record.?
For great justice.
?We?re friends. Well, were? but anyways, who found her here? It?s important.?
I suppose it wouldn?t hurt to tell her.
?A Miss Marisa Kirisame.?
?Oh Youchrist. This is bad.?
The words coming out of this child?s mouth!
?Once more, Miss Hakurei-?
?Please, I hate it when you?re so formal. We?ve known each other for long enough, so call me Reimu.?
?Fine. Um? Reimu, I ask you once more not to use profanities in my presence. And what do you mean by that? Did Miss Kirisame-?
?Marisa.?
Yes, I know her name.
?Don?t get carried away, this is still an investigation. Did Miss Kirisame have a relationship with Miss Margatroid??
?Yeah, you could say that??
What does that mean? Is she hiding something?
?But what would you say??
?I would say they were friends.?
?Is that all??
?Don?t worry, anything past this point will not be on the record.? I silently turned off the recorder in my pocket.
?Okay. But you must promise to never repeat in any way, shape, or form what I?m about to tell you.?
If it gets you to talk. What am I thinking?
?If a friend could not trust me in matters such as this, how could I ever be trusted to carry the burdens of a Yama??
?Good.?
There was a little pause.
?So? as you were saying??
?Hmm? umm? have you ever been in love with anyone, Shikieki??
As a Yama, I?ve been asked many, many questions about myself: have I ever made the wrong call on anything (irrelevant), what do I do when I?m not on the job (irrelevant), do I have any hobbies or interests (irrelevant), how old I really am (extra irrelevant) and little things like that; I?ve never been caught off guard by any inquiry into myself until now.
?E-eh? W-w-what kind of question are you asking at this time? A-as a Yama, I h-have had no need to-?
?Not as a Yama. Not as anyone but yourself. Have you ever been in love??
She was completely straight-faced. This was no joke.
?W-well, uh, t-t-that sort of t-thing??
I thought of Valentine?s Day.
?? m-may have happened??
And then it dawned on me. Is she implying?.
?Wait, do you mean those two were-?
?Exactly that.?
I was not expecting that at all. Sure, I knew the two hung around together quite a bit, but it hadn?t even crossed my mind that they were together.
?Oh my.?
?Well, almost exactly that. You know what they have in common??
Enlighten me.
?They?re both incredibly stubborn. Neither one was going to admit to the other how they felt, but they couldn?t live without each other. Until now, at least.?
I?m not a fan of black humor.
?That?s a horrible thing to say about them.?
?No! I meant about the admitting part!?
Oh. Oops.
?About a week ago, both of them, separately of course, came up to me with a grand idea. You know how there?s gonna be a full moon again this week??
No.
?Yes, what about it??
Wait, I don?t want her talking again. What happens around a full moon??
?Oh, do you mean Eientei?s Moon Festival? I heard that something special event would be happening this time.?
?Yeah. Alice had been working with Nitori on something for the past couple of months, and they had finished whatever it was around the time she had come to me. I think Nitori would know more about it because Alice wouldn?t say anything about it to me.?
Suspicious. I know who?s just been added to my list of people to interrogate.
?And Miss Kirisame? Did she know anything about this??
?I?m almost positive she knew that Alice and Nitori were working together, but I don?t know if she knew what it was that had to be so secret. But anyways, they, Alice and Marisa of course, both told me that they wanted to confess. I suggested that they ? still talking to them separately ? should do it after Alice?s big show or whatever, because I assumed that everything would go well. Everything was going well??
?And now this.?
?Yeah, now this.?
I have no idea how I?m going to work this into a report.
?Well, I thank you for this most? enlightening conversation. I am sure it will help in the future? somehow. You may leave, Reimu.?
?What? I?m not leaving.?
Oh, here we go again?
?But I thought that you were only here to check on Miss Margatroid, and maybe Miss Kirisame. In fact, you should probably go see her righ-?
?You do have a point??
So close.
?As her friend, I should probably be with her right now, telling her that things?ll be better and that when Alice comes for judgment, you could just send her up? But I?m not her friend. I?m her best friend, and I know that even though she might not realize it now, what she really wants is two things: one, to see Alice again; and two, to see her murderer brought to justice. I want to see at least the second one happen, and if it happens with my help or even because of it, it?ll mean the world to me as long as it makes Marisa happy. So I want to help you, Shikieki. I swear I?ll try not to screw things up, and if I do, I?ll take any punishment. Okay??
I was thoroughly impressed and even a little touched with Reimu?s devotion to Alice?s happiness. She might not be so bad after all. I can?t tell her that, though.
?? alright, fine. You can help. However, let me make this clear: I will PERSONALLY hold you responsible should anything bad happen.?
?I would expect nothing less from a Yama, especially you.?
Good answer, keep it up and I might actually hire you. But first things first.
?Well, now that you?re helping me, you get the joyous task of questioning your best friend on what she found. At least she?ll be willing to say more if it?s you.?
Nice dodge, me. I hate interrogating the first witness. It?s always so? depressing.
?Oh great, thanks? Hey, Shikieki??
What is it, lackey?
?Yes, what is it??
?I?m sure that you really could fudge your decision a little when the time comes, but I know you wouldn?t betray your principles just to make someone else feel better. I know you. I?m your friend too. I just wanted to let you know that I?ve got your back.?
Oh wow. I think she really means it. I?m almost at a loss for words, I?ve never heard someone say something like that! Quick, think of something nice!
?Um? thank you. You know, you always look like you?ve got this forceful air around you from a distance, but you?re not so bad up close.?
?I could say the same to you.?
Touch?. Wait, I see what you?re trying to do here!
?You?re still questioning her.?
??dammit.?
?Reimu!?
You may have noticed, but in the story I'll be telling different parts of it from the first-person perspective. Just making that clear for anyone who didn't catch that.
And now, any praise, criticism, and comparisons to Law and Order go under here.
