Author Topic: Alice (An Oscar parody)  (Read 2626 times)

Von Stein

  • Just some insane airhead.
  • What's this newfangled stuff?
Alice (An Oscar parody)
« on: September 30, 2012, 06:17:03 PM »
The doorbell rang.

Three words that hold great power, great promise, great threat, just plain great potential.

It could be the mailman with news of that cousin in the war. Or the neighbour, asking to borrow a jar of newt's eyes again. Or it could be that cute person down the street you have been eying. Or maybe just some kid, ringing and dashing. It could be anything.

This lady, moving to open the door, dressed in a snappy butler's suit, with long flowing silver hair, adorned with red and white paper-talisman-ribbons couldn't have cared less if it was the Hakurei Shrine Lucky Balls with a billion yen in winnings, or Kanako's Witnesses, whoever was in front of that door at this unholily early hour of the morning would get burned.

Something, it should be advised, that was quite possible. But I digress, you must wonder where all this takes place. The place is Gensokyo City, a city of magic and dreams, both metaphorical, and literal. More specifically we are currently on the land of one Lady Mima, living a bit outside the city, in a rather lavish little cabin for three people and some staff. The time, specifically, is ten minutes past ten in the morning.

"What?" The door flew open and the servant, on Fujiwara no Mokou glared out of the house into empty air. "Good morning, Miss Mokou. Could I speak to Lady Mima please?" A voice entered Mokou's ears from slightly below where she was looking, from whence also a staff suddenly appeared swiveling through the air in front of her for a moment, before prompting the grumpy servant to look down, and see a woman dressed in greens and yellows, with bright red hair.

The smaller woman looked up with a big grin, waving her staff at Mokou, and holding a large bouquet in her other hand. The sight triggered an expected reaction from Mokou. Once the smoke had settled, and most of the fire had died down, she sighed as the young girl appeared to have erected a barrier around herself. "Please, Miss Mokou?" "Oh for crying out loud, the Mistress doesn't take visitors at this early hour," Mokou slammed the door in the small woman's face and turned to leave.

The doorbell rang.

Mokou grumbled, turned around, opened the door and unleashed another inferno at the hapless woman outside. Several squeals and the sound of running feet indicated a great success. Seeing instead a blonde girl in a blue dress running and crying indicated a mistake. Mokou shrugged, closed the door, and almost tripped over the colorful lady from a moment ago.

"Tell Mima that Orange wants to see her, and that it's a matter of life and death," Orange proclaimed and pointed her staff smugly into the house. Mokou planted her palm squarely in her face. "Very well, your funeral.""Oh also, I will be having breakfast with the mistress, so make it for two. And have a yukkuri ready for when I call you." "Sure, whatever, I'll get you a bell to ring me with." "And take these flowers and hide them until I ask for them, ok?" "Would madame like me to floss her teeth and polish her buttocks too?" "Later~" Mokou shook her head and took the flowers, a really quite pretty assortment of roses, particularly a few red Misses Hakureis, a few white Maiden's Blushes and like an explanation mark, a single Elly de Funes rose. She then moved out of sight for a moment, presumably to hide the roses or perhaps burn them, before returning to knock on a door gently.

There was no response.

Mokou knocked louder.

Still no response.

"OI, MIMA! WAKE UP!" "Mrmph, go away!" The voice came out from the room.

Some might attribute Mima's state as being a ghost to not be too keen to wake up outside the witching hour, and while it is true, that this entrepreneur parties hard during that hour, it is far more likely that said partying hard is to blame for the late hour of Lady Mima's usual rising from her bed.

"Some Orange is here to see you." "Tell her to get into the fruit salad, I'm not hungry yet. Blasted annoying oranges." "She says it's a matter of live and death." "Mmrphl, I'll be right there." Mokou turned to Orange, shrugged, and wandered off.

A moment later the door flew open, and Mima, long green hair, pointy blue nightcap, and sporting a very fashionable, by which I mean completely casual, set of pajamas, featuring a set of teddy bears on a starry blue sky, did like said door and flew out of the room. "What is it?! Is the Office in flames?! Did the stocks plummet?! Did I park in the wrong spot again?!" "Calm yourself, Lady Mima, it's nothing of that nature."

Mima rubbed her face, and stretched. "Ok, Miss Orange... let's continue this upstairs in the office." She pointed up one of the flights of stairs, and a hop, a skip and a float later Mima was sitting in a comfortable chair behind a desk, and orange was pacing back and forth infront of it.

"Out with it, Miss Orange, what is so important that you would wake me up at such an early and unholy hour of the day?" "Lady Mima, you know I would not disturb you if, what I was about to ask was not of the utmost, the most direst of urgency." "Go on, or I will urgently require an undertaker." "Lady Mima, I request a ra-" At that moment, the door opened and Mokou entered: "Here's the bell for later." "OUT! Out I say, out!" "Ok, ok, ease off, Mima." Mokou placed the small hand bell on a cabinet next to the door rolled her eyes, and made herself scarce.

Mima returned her attention to the small woman before her. "You were saying?"

Orange took a deep breath: "I request a raise."



The prologue of a small story to follow here... who knows, maybe I'll actually follow this story through to its conclusion. T_T

In case anyone wonders, the rose bouquet consists of Mister Lincolns, Maiden's Blushes and Louis de Funes roses. if any of those are not fitting for a bouquet, then sorry, I am neither a botanist, nor a florist. ^_^;;

And for anyone that actually knows the source material, I'll hope you still enjoy the ride.
Can't think of a good signature.
More lilies maybe?